Having people over for drinks, backyard parties or, most recently, Thanksgiving dinners can be one of the most enjoyable things in the world. Many of us love inviting visitors into our humble dwellings, and we always go the extra mile to make them feel as comfortable as possible. Fluffy pillows, soft lighting, scented candles, soothing music, you name it, making our guests feel at home tends to make us all happy and warm inside, too.
But some people may have a different idea of what being a respectful and courteous guest means. Then, it can do homeowners well to set some boundaries and stick to them from the get-go.
So to gain inspiration from people who firmly draw the line, Redditor cigarandcreamsoda reached out to fellow members of the 'Ask Reddit' community: "What is a non-negotiable rule in your house for everyone?" As the thread immediately became a hit, we at Bored Panda have gathered a list of some of the most interesting responses down below. Continue scrolling to check them all out, upvote the ones you agree with, and be sure to share your own unyielding house rules with us in the comments!
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I live alone with my dog. When my friends come over, they make comments about my dog being on my furniture or that he sleeps in the bed with me. It’s my house and my dog’s house. If they don’t like it, they can leave.
You don't get to hug my kids if they don't want to hug you. I don't care if you're the grandparent or what.
If there is a cat on your lap, you don’t have to get up for any reason.
Knock first! Bathroom, bedroom or study room. Knocking is a slowly forgotten art of respect.
The dog lives here - you don’t.
I have timid cats, leave them alone. If they come up to you, fine. Don't be chasing them around the house trying to pet them or pick them up. You won't be invited over ever again.
Don't f**k around with someone when they are asleep. If someone is asleep, they're off limits, no messing with/pranks and no waking up without good reason. It wasn't until talking to my friends who had siblings who would pile things on them, move the bed, wake them up in the middle of the night (just general sibling hijinks) And realised how important the 'leave sleeping family members alone' was in our house growing up
Don’t feed my dogs, anything. I don’t care how cute they are looking at you.
WASHING HANDS AFTER USING THE WASHROOM.
No smoking
As someone who used to smoke, I totally agree. If you want to smoke you can go to the balcony.
Car doesn’t go in drive unless everyone has their seatbelts on.
Nobody gets humiliated. For nothing. Joking around, banter, discussions, arguments, all fine. Humiliation, as in name calling, laughing down, patronising, unhelpful comments that just hurt and don't do anything else - no.
My husband has a very snarky sense of humor. Back when we were dating I told him his jokes were too similar to what my bullies did in school. After a short discussion we came up with a solution. When he has a joke that might be hurtful he says that it is a joke BEFORE saying the joke. That way he can indulge his sense of humor and I know he thought about whether it might be hurtful or not and wanted me to know he is not serious. It took practice on his part, some patience on mine, but very quickly he was pretty good about it, and not long after that, real good. All because he didn't want to hurt me and once he knew his words hurt he wanted to change. So, yes, no humiliation, no bullying in my house.
Shoes off!
okay, listen. I'm not the hugest fan of this rule, only because of my dad. He's diabetic and *has* to wear shoes while walking around or he could seriously hurt his feet. That would be my only exception unless something else just as important comes around
But surely he could have a pair of comfy indoor shoes / slippers? If you want (or need) to wear shoes indoors, wear clean ones. I don't know why anybody is fine with tracking in outdoor dirt/poop/gum/etc into their houses and all over their floors.
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If you want me to take my shoes off your house better be spotless. 9 times out of 10 when I take my shoes off in someone's house I'm stepping on food crumbs, water bowl drool, carpet that hasn't been vacuumed, etc.
So few people I know have this rule except myself. I automatically take my shoes off in others homes too. The amount of people who think it's acceptable to just stroll through my house over my £1000 carpet in shoes boggles me.
Come up to the nordic countries and you'll be hard pressed to find a home that doesn't have that rule. They even make kids take their outdoor shoes off and use indoor shoes at primary schools here.
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The problem with the is people have various feet problems. My mom had planter fasciitis and wore shoes from body up to body down. I have sciatic nerve troubles that reach down to my feet. I have to protect my feet from the pain. I'm not taking my shoes off for anyone.
Carry those thin shower caps to put over your shoes. Some contractor always use them. Can be purchased at home improvement store & beauty supple stores. I don’t believe in naked feet because you can pick up a nasty fungus.
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This is just me, but hey, as long as you haven't been stomping in mud puddles or work in sanitation department or something, if you wanna leave your shoes on at my place, I could care less. My floors are clean so if you wanna take em off, have at it. There's no unwritten rule that says you HAVE TO TAKE THEM OFF. If I come to your place and I know it's a rule, I'm bringing slippers.
Same. I was hoping someone else was okay with this. I have to say that I'm the only one who doesn't take their shoes off. My husband does it and so does my children.
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There's no reason to keep shoes on! I heat my apartment so no one will have cold feet. I don't wantt anyone to bring the street in my cozy living room
Unless I expressly tell them that it is okay to keep them on. (times when I haven't yet washed the floors lol)
Especially if a young child/toddler lives in the home!! If you see a child crawling on the floor, take your shoes off so the baby isn't playing in whatever filth you dragged in on bottom of your shoes! Yuck!!
i know my response won't be popular but I once showed up to friends house and they asked me to take my shoes off, I just turned around and left. I am uncomfortable being in my socks or barefoot.
So you make elderly and handicapped folks balance on one foot to take shoes off and on? Let them suffer in pain with out the support their shoes provide, or slip and fall in sock feet? Nice people.
Of course not, don't be a fool. They can bring indoor shoes, and can sit on a chair while changing, it is not that complicated.
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I would say to please let people know if this is what you want. Don't get offended if someone comes in and doesn't automatically do it. It's not standard everywhere. I would have no problem doing it as long as my friend lets me know so I can make sure I wear socks or something.
American here. Midwest region. My elderly mother who is from elsewhere cannot fathom walking around in another person's house in socks. She was down for Thanksgiving and I knew she was dreadfully mortified but hid it well and was as charming as ever.
That's the rule for our home. However, guests are not required to do so unless they have dirty shoes
I still don't get this. So I get to walk around in your house, get cold feet, pick up whatever germs, pet hair, dirt you have on your floor? Or worse, you get all the germs gathering on my feet if they are bare.
I live on a farm. I guarantee you no matter how much cat hair is on my floor or germs are on your feet, they're not covered in mud, animal s**t and dirt like outside is. We have a mud room for shoes, if you don't use it, don't come into my house.
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Ok. But how do you defend asking people to put dirty socks back into their shoes? Is your floor immaculate? Do you offer them slippers or other foot covering?
I'd rather that than have dirty shoes all over my floors, rugs and furniture.
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Then supply some kind of slippers for your guests. Rude to force them to go barefoot! Vacuum if you must as soon as they leave.
Yes, it's much better for you to walk around in your sweaty socks, with verruca juice seeping through lol. If you warn me that you have this rule, I would bring my slippers but don't just drop it on me.
Shoes on...I don't want your acrid, sweat-laced footprints all over my house
No, think this is weird. No shoes upstairs but downstairs? Too precious for words.
The cleanliness of my floor is not more important than the health and comfort of my people.
That's the whole point of taking your shoes off: the health and comfort of your guests.🙄
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god no one understands this one no matter how many times its told.
Don't put stuff on the stairs. Almost died once. Never again!
One of the biggest rules is actually for when people are leaving my home, and it's a very simple one, "Text me when you get home safely."
Noone gets in without at least 5 days of warning and an exact arrival time. I need to f*****g clean.
If you pee on the toilet seat clean it up!!!
I am a single parent with 2 boys, I know I'm not the one peeing on the toilet seat but apparently they don't either.
Unless you've explicitly been invited to spend the night go away at the end of the night. I'll call you an uber, I'll pay your cab if I have to, I'll give you a ride to retrieve your car tomorrow, but go away.
I like hosting, but only friends who also leave without basically being shoved out the door eventually.
I have a friend who never knows when to leave. I could be standing in my pj's after a shower with lights turned off and she would still be sitting chatting with herself. I love her to death, but she is very clueless. Now I just tell her to leave when she overstays.
Put the lid down on toilet! We have shelves by the toilet and I don't know how many stuff jumped into the toilet.
Omg my friend and I just talked about this. Who wants to look into a toilet. If you’re not using it the lid is shut so that nothing randomly falls down it. When your lipstick goes flying off the counter it doesn’t go into the poo water. It’s an obvi that most households don’t even care about. A simple thing too.
Don't leave time on the microwave!
Someone is doing that at work....I' ll find him one day and then..... (Liam Neeson voice)
If the TV is on, your phone volume should be set to zero or else wear headphones. Same goes for any other electronic devices. There are few things more annoying than volume wars in the living room.
I wish my parents would do this. They always have their TV playing very loudly even when noone is watching it. Meanwhile my autistic nephew runs around playing loud irritating repetitive youtube videos on his tablet, their phones are always going and when they answer they shout over the din. The noise levels can get ridiculous and it really stresses me out. I almost always end up with a migraine whenever I spend any time there.
Don't EVER touch my God damn thermostat ........EVER!
One side of the kitchen sink stays empty!
We have one of those two-basin stainless sinks and it drives me absolutely bonkers when I have to remove and stack dishes just to get water to make coffee in the morning.
No outside clothes on the bed
You *will* give my dogs at minimum one pat and one "good boy" each or you're leaving.
Since my friends have manners, I have no rules. If you aren't a friend, you're not in my house
That how it should be. If people have manners, they don't need any imposing rules.
It used to be to not pee on the carpet.
My wiener dog disagrees with that rule
Well, you have to respect the fact that your flatmate may have different views.
Who ever has the higher standard for a chore does the chore.
When I do the dishes, I do the dishes. When my wife does the dishes, she does the dishes, makes coffee, and wipes down the counters.
When my wife sweeps, she gets the major areas. When I sweep, I move all the furniture and toys, then sweep every room, under every bed, then spot mop, then vacuum all the rugs and carpeted areas.
Minimum pants (underwear) at the dinner table. Remarkably something you have to enforce quite often with small children.
This is funny because it's true... my kid was quite a nudist as a toddler 🤣
If there is food in the house, it is available to anyone. Company included.
That is really nice. It’s available to company. IF THEY ASK ME!!! If company goes into my kitchen opens my cabinets and fridge and has at it. I have a big probably with that. To grab a water sure. But just ask about the food and I’ll be happy to share but to have the audacity to rummage through someone else’s fridge or cabinets without asking first. Yikes
No slamming doors.
Strange how in TV shows, when someone is arguing in the kitchen they slam the doors and drawers ....just wait till they have soft close and it will seem surreal
Clean after yourself. Let people have their turn to speak. If things get heated, take break before you say s**t you’ll regret afterwards.
And always, always, close the dog gate after you walk in lest the dog go on an endless adventure.
Hubby still isn't fully trained on closing the gate. Our lab has escaped several times but we live where traffic isn't an issue. Still, I'm ready to string Hubby up by his thumbs at times.
If i want to sit on my countertops don’t tell me i f*****g cant.
Thats what my cats try to tell me about the tables..... I have allready given up on trying to stop them, Im nothing but a 100kg can apener to them.
Note: this post originally had 50 images. It’s been shortened to the top 40 images based on user votes.
I would add to not start filming on your camera at my home unless I give you permission. It shouldn't have to be said but, here we go. I have a friend who's grown, adult daughter comes by with her occasionally and she'll just start filming a tiktok video while walking around my home. I mentioned this to a co-worker of mine once and she said she found out one of her daughter's friend's parents are family vloggers and they did a whole video for their 'family blog' with her daughter in it because she had visited once. I don't have kids but I would be super annoyed if you put pictures or video of my kid online without my permission.
Yeah, all daycares, schools etc. have to have you sign waivers, but (a-hole) friends could just put your toddler up on the Internet... I'm glad my friends and family always ask before sharing pictures and videos with someone.
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I have two rules except the common ones like no shoes, be clean and don't be rude: No. 1 is: If I cook, you eat. If I invite people over there will be at least snacks available. These snacks are home made. If you tell me beforehand that you will have eaten before - fine. I won't cook anything. But if I invte you to my house expect food. You don't have to eat a lot. I will accomodate to your diet. If your vegan, veggie, gluten free - I'll make it possible. I will spend time and energy to make this food so show some respect and eat it. Or tell me beforehand you're not hungry. The second rule is to drink while eating. I hate people who only eat and don't have a glass on the side while doing so. I will make you drink at least a glass of water while at mine. Because y'all don't drink enough and it's weird to not drink while eating.
None of these rules are strange. Most of them should be common sense and a matter of respect.
Honestly the only bizarre one to me was 'don't look outside during these random three minutes'.
Load More Replies... Some of you are quite gracious! Many of you are not folks whose home I would care to visit.
just curious, what rules do you not like from this list? I thought most of them seemed reasonable
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For G's sake put the toilet lid down when you flush! Especially after Nr 2! Saves a lot of smell and bacteria floating around the bathroom! I'm not a hypochondriac but this can make me pretty pissed off if you don't do it. Also: if it's not in the laundry basket it won't get washed. Period.
Really, my only rule for guests is, no guests in the house. It keeps things simple. My kids' friends come over on occasion, but those are kids, and they're usually more well behaved than my own kids, so it's cool. Adults are too judgey, they can stay in their own houses.
LOL I made an exception for a mom who wanted to pick up her kid or with a bday party, the parents could bring em inside. My immediate family is welcome, because they don't judge.
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Stay outta my kitchen. If I'm cooking, I'm using a knife. Do not be int he way. Please. Other than that, just take off your shoes, be polite.
Mine is no sudden movements or sound. Due to my autism I have really bad sensory issues and get very quickly thrown into a meltdown if I see something suddenly coming towards me or moving in general or if someone is talking at a normal volume and then suddenly shouting or yelling, or just making a lot of noise. It stresses me out and a lot of people don't get it, specifically my parents
My oldest son and his GF are both autistic but on each end/side of the spectrum so they complement each other. I didn't know then but we never shout in our house because my youngest son and I get migraines really quickly. One of his friends had to stop coming over because he was doing exactly like you described and we couldn't take it.
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It's easier to remain alone than make rules. My only rule: Humans not welcome here.
My own rule is "let me know you are coming in advance or accept that I may not have cold beer for you and you will have to accept whatever food is on. If you let me know in advance, beer will be cold and I will prepare food you will like."
The animals get fed first.... dogs then the raptors and the donkey before any human lol
My rules are as follows: You don't have to love on the dogs, but you do have to be nice to them; they love you and if you make them sad, I will make YOU sad. You don't have to ask for permission to use the bathroom, get yourself some water or a tissue, or for a blanket/sweater if you're cold. Pick up after yourself, especially anything the dogs might try to eat. End of list.
You have to pay attention to my kids. They’re excited you’re here. They want to welcome you into their home and offer a treat. They want to show you their cool stuff. They want to tell you their secrets and play. It takes less than five minutes of our adult time, but sticks with them forever. And meal time means family time. No outside world. For us, meal time is time for fueling, grounding, and reconnecting with each other. And careful when petting that one particular cat, he’s unpredictable.
My house, my rules, and no one else gets a say, PERIOD. FLUSH the FKing toilet, wash your hands, and clean up after yourself. No smoking anywhere on our property. You do NOT get to turn on the TV or change the channel because it's our home, not yours. You do NOT question any of our purchases. Our lifestyle is none of your business. We don't want kids, so STFKUP or your out on your a**e, NO EXCEPTIONS.
My mom's was no food in the bedroom. My husband and I just moved to an area with a lot of hiking and walking trails. Our daughter has a rule that if we say "stop," "wait," or "too far" then she had better stop walking. Grandma also has our daughter and her best friend trained the same way. The girls are 3 and 4.
Mine is that no one may punish themselves in regards to food. In this house we feed ourselves with love.
No slamming doors or yelling through the house for someone's attention.
No drugs or alcohol allowed in my home. What you do in your own space is your business but I worked hard to get sober and I want to stay that way.
I'm sorry, but if you invite me to your house, your pet isn't more important than I am. WAY too many pet rules here.
Okay, you're getting downvoted and shouldn't. Yes, too many about the pets. I have to pet your cat because it wants me to? I don't think so. Same with a child; it's not getting in my arms if I don't want that child in my arms.
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No phones or hats at the dinner table is a big one in my house. Sorry if you have hat hair, but I really don't give a s*it. There's no reason to wear a hat while you're eating and unless it's a family member (who knows better than to call at dinner time so if they do, it's an emergency), there is no call or text that can't wait 30 minutes.
Not sure why you're getting downvoted so here's an upvote to keep you at 0.
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1) Hard rule: NO tilting of windows! Open it fully or close it, but just tilted is a death trap for cats. 2) Should be obvious rule: Nice of you to help me tidy up, but only clean stuff is to be put in its place. Yes, even if fresh out of the dishwasher, if it is still dirty it doesn't go into the cupboard. Yes, that pullover was only worn for half a day, but it goes to "the chair", not back into the wardrobe.
wdym by tilting windows? Our windows only slide up and down, I don't think I've ever seen one that tilts
Load More Replies... I would add to not start filming on your camera at my home unless I give you permission. It shouldn't have to be said but, here we go. I have a friend who's grown, adult daughter comes by with her occasionally and she'll just start filming a tiktok video while walking around my home. I mentioned this to a co-worker of mine once and she said she found out one of her daughter's friend's parents are family vloggers and they did a whole video for their 'family blog' with her daughter in it because she had visited once. I don't have kids but I would be super annoyed if you put pictures or video of my kid online without my permission.
Yeah, all daycares, schools etc. have to have you sign waivers, but (a-hole) friends could just put your toddler up on the Internet... I'm glad my friends and family always ask before sharing pictures and videos with someone.
Load More Replies... I have two rules except the common ones like no shoes, be clean and don't be rude: No. 1 is: If I cook, you eat. If I invite people over there will be at least snacks available. These snacks are home made. If you tell me beforehand that you will have eaten before - fine. I won't cook anything. But if I invte you to my house expect food. You don't have to eat a lot. I will accomodate to your diet. If your vegan, veggie, gluten free - I'll make it possible. I will spend time and energy to make this food so show some respect and eat it. Or tell me beforehand you're not hungry. The second rule is to drink while eating. I hate people who only eat and don't have a glass on the side while doing so. I will make you drink at least a glass of water while at mine. Because y'all don't drink enough and it's weird to not drink while eating.
None of these rules are strange. Most of them should be common sense and a matter of respect.
Honestly the only bizarre one to me was 'don't look outside during these random three minutes'.
Load More Replies... Some of you are quite gracious! Many of you are not folks whose home I would care to visit.
just curious, what rules do you not like from this list? I thought most of them seemed reasonable
Load More Replies... For G's sake put the toilet lid down when you flush! Especially after Nr 2! Saves a lot of smell and bacteria floating around the bathroom! I'm not a hypochondriac but this can make me pretty pissed off if you don't do it. Also: if it's not in the laundry basket it won't get washed. Period.
Really, my only rule for guests is, no guests in the house. It keeps things simple. My kids' friends come over on occasion, but those are kids, and they're usually more well behaved than my own kids, so it's cool. Adults are too judgey, they can stay in their own houses.
LOL I made an exception for a mom who wanted to pick up her kid or with a bday party, the parents could bring em inside. My immediate family is welcome, because they don't judge.
Load More Replies... Stay outta my kitchen. If I'm cooking, I'm using a knife. Do not be int he way. Please. Other than that, just take off your shoes, be polite.
Mine is no sudden movements or sound. Due to my autism I have really bad sensory issues and get very quickly thrown into a meltdown if I see something suddenly coming towards me or moving in general or if someone is talking at a normal volume and then suddenly shouting or yelling, or just making a lot of noise. It stresses me out and a lot of people don't get it, specifically my parents
My oldest son and his GF are both autistic but on each end/side of the spectrum so they complement each other. I didn't know then but we never shout in our house because my youngest son and I get migraines really quickly. One of his friends had to stop coming over because he was doing exactly like you described and we couldn't take it.
Load More Replies... It's easier to remain alone than make rules. My only rule: Humans not welcome here.
My own rule is "let me know you are coming in advance or accept that I may not have cold beer for you and you will have to accept whatever food is on. If you let me know in advance, beer will be cold and I will prepare food you will like."
The animals get fed first.... dogs then the raptors and the donkey before any human lol
My rules are as follows: You don't have to love on the dogs, but you do have to be nice to them; they love you and if you make them sad, I will make YOU sad. You don't have to ask for permission to use the bathroom, get yourself some water or a tissue, or for a blanket/sweater if you're cold. Pick up after yourself, especially anything the dogs might try to eat. End of list.
You have to pay attention to my kids. They’re excited you’re here. They want to welcome you into their home and offer a treat. They want to show you their cool stuff. They want to tell you their secrets and play. It takes less than five minutes of our adult time, but sticks with them forever. And meal time means family time. No outside world. For us, meal time is time for fueling, grounding, and reconnecting with each other. And careful when petting that one particular cat, he’s unpredictable.
My house, my rules, and no one else gets a say, PERIOD. FLUSH the FKing toilet, wash your hands, and clean up after yourself. No smoking anywhere on our property. You do NOT get to turn on the TV or change the channel because it's our home, not yours. You do NOT question any of our purchases. Our lifestyle is none of your business. We don't want kids, so STFKUP or your out on your a**e, NO EXCEPTIONS.
My mom's was no food in the bedroom. My husband and I just moved to an area with a lot of hiking and walking trails. Our daughter has a rule that if we say "stop," "wait," or "too far" then she had better stop walking. Grandma also has our daughter and her best friend trained the same way. The girls are 3 and 4.
Mine is that no one may punish themselves in regards to food. In this house we feed ourselves with love.
No slamming doors or yelling through the house for someone's attention.
No drugs or alcohol allowed in my home. What you do in your own space is your business but I worked hard to get sober and I want to stay that way.
I'm sorry, but if you invite me to your house, your pet isn't more important than I am. WAY too many pet rules here.
Okay, you're getting downvoted and shouldn't. Yes, too many about the pets. I have to pet your cat because it wants me to? I don't think so. Same with a child; it's not getting in my arms if I don't want that child in my arms.
Load More Replies... No phones or hats at the dinner table is a big one in my house. Sorry if you have hat hair, but I really don't give a s*it. There's no reason to wear a hat while you're eating and unless it's a family member (who knows better than to call at dinner time so if they do, it's an emergency), there is no call or text that can't wait 30 minutes.
Not sure why you're getting downvoted so here's an upvote to keep you at 0.
Load More Replies... 1) Hard rule: NO tilting of windows! Open it fully or close it, but just tilted is a death trap for cats. 2) Should be obvious rule: Nice of you to help me tidy up, but only clean stuff is to be put in its place. Yes, even if fresh out of the dishwasher, if it is still dirty it doesn't go into the cupboard. Yes, that pullover was only worn for half a day, but it goes to "the chair", not back into the wardrobe.
wdym by tilting windows? Our windows only slide up and down, I don't think I've ever seen one that tilts
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