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40 Times People Had To Hold Their Laugh Because They Realized The Person Wasn’t Joking
You’ve probably been there: you’re talking with someone, only for them to make a claim so outrageous or awkward that you think they must be joking or (badly) lying. When, in reality, they were being 100% truthful. And there you are, left flabbergasted and unsure how to respond.
In a bizarrely entertaining thread on Askreddit, some folks opened up the weirdest moments when they found themselves in exactly these kinds of situations. Check out their unbelievable (yet true) stories below. They’re a reminder that fact can often be stranger than fiction.
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#1
Her: How do we even know that Dinosaurs were called Dinosaurs if they're all extinct now and we've never met one in real life?
Me: Hahaha that's funny.
Her: What's funny?
Me: Oh honey...
It took me literally half an hour to even get her slightly on board with the fact that things are called things because we decided on the name not because things inherently have a name we discover.
I wish I was joking.
GenuineJen 2 months ago
Thank goodness for Ralph, otherwise we'd never have known what to call them.
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Trillian 2 months ago (edited)
How did she things it works with the things/animals that still exist? Did they introduce themselves at some point? 'Good morning, I am an Orca. That's o-r-c-a.'
Kirsten Kerkhof 2 months ago
I'm just glad they were named by actual scientists and not by the general public, or the Triceratops would be called something like Chonky-boi McPointy-Face.
Becky Samuel 2 months ago
Trust me, scientists do this sort of thing quite a lot, they just hide it by using greek and latin. The spiky bit on the end of certain dinosaurs' tails is called a 'Thagomizer' because of a Gary Larson cartoon.
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Ace 2 months ago
TBF I do sometimes get riled by documentaries that consistently use the wrong tense when referring to ancient animals or objects they've just discovered. "This was called a ..." No, it was not called that. It _is_ called that now, but there was nobody to do the calling when it actually existed.
tameson 2 months ago
Because that is the only reasonable explanation for how we know their names.
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Sam Trudeau 2 months ago
It wasn't immediately after they were discovered either. The Megolosaurus was named by a guy who just said "BFL. Big freaking lizard" (not word for word, but in short, he said it was big lizard). But then again, said guy died eating the heart of Louis XIV. Wish I was joking
Rich Black 2 months ago
in a biology class one of the students suggested we pivot away from the focus on "evolution of man" to how women separately evolved. seriously
RELATED:
#2
I own a small electronics design business (30 employees). A part-time intern working 20 hrs a week and making about $15 an hour came to me and said "I have to cut my hours back to 10 a week - so I'll need for you to double my salary."
Yeah, no. Have a nice life.
Michael Largey 2 months ago
"I'm not showing up at all any more. So you'll have to set my salary to infinity."
KatWitch57 2 months ago
FFS just spend 10 minutes giving a lesson in reality. There is no real education, young people need to understand what it is they are doing wrong.
#3
Dated a girl for ~4 months a few years back. One day we're chilling at my house, ask her if she wants to watch an episode of a documentary *Wonders of the universe* to which she told me she *"doesn't believe in space"*
She was 100% convinced that the sky was all their was and that space was a huge cover up by the government.
At first I laughed, then we argued and I couldn't win because I haven't been to space to prove it exists.
We didn't see much of each other after that.
Resting B. 2 months ago
Wow... people would invent and believe anything as it is less demanding for their brain..
WindySwede 2 months ago
I guess theist and/or huge distrust in anything guvernement? Could also be a flerfer?
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Ace 2 months ago
That's actually quite impressive. Did she also deny the existence of, say, the Sahara, or Antarctica, or anywhere else that you personally had never been to?
Nicole Weymann 2 months ago
I'd like to know if she's religious, though...and if so, then based on what "evidence"
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Jumping Jellyfishes 2 months ago
These people who don't believe in something they haven't personally seen (dinosaurs, space, the shape of the earth from space) tend to be strongly religious... no?
Rich Black 2 months ago
she doesn't believe education either. all the teachers were lying to her?
Cpt. Christan "Panda Bombero" 2 months ago
Flerfer, Dino Denier, Non-Mooner, etc. I mean, I have never been to the deepest oceanic trench, but I am pretty d**n sure it exists.
As reported by Forbes, the most important factors to consider whether someone is a liar include a person’s body language, voice inflection, and eye contact.
For example, based on research by the University of Michigan, liars maintain eye contact 70% of the time.
Meanwhile, according to former CIA agents in the book, ‘Spy the Lie,’ people naturally want to physically cover a lie and to hide from others’ reactions. So, some folks actually physically cover their mouth or close their eyes.
And if someone says that they’re a ‘good liar,’ you should believe them. This is a better indication that they’re actually a good liar than taking a lie detector test.
#4
My grandmother and grandfather were discussing how their computer could have contracted a virus, when my grandmother says: "Well it has gotten awfully chilly outside..." Wait... What?
Delicate Fcuking Flower 2 months ago
Yeah I can't even be frustrated at that lol it's rather precious
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Mike L 2 months ago
At a library in Honolulu I was waiting behind an elderly woman. She was afraid to step up to the counter where they run the book spine over a magnet to deactivate the alarm strip before checkout. The reason? A sign in front of her said "DO not place personal bags or items if they have floppy disks". She thought it meant her disks in her back!
Crissy Newbury 1 month ago
I have greatgrandchildren. Friends and older family come to me to sort out their phones, tablets, iPads etc. I learned by watching, listening, and just getting on with it.
#5
Someone once said to me " Wait you're Chinese? I always thought you were Asian.".
Leg less In Minneapolis 2 months ago
I think it would very helpful if the village idiots wore some type of identification
Sam Trudeau 2 months ago
I keep hearing (not to me, but to others) "Wait, Germany? You mean Europe?"
Jerusalem Cat Syndrome 2 months ago
This is what happens when being specific is politically incorrect.
#6
**Friend:** I have something I need to tell you.
**Me:** Dude, everyone already knows that you're gay.
**Friend:** Yeah that's what I wanted to tell you. How did everyone know?
Me: Haha, funny man. What is it that you really wanted to tell me.
**Friend:** That was really it. I'm gay.
**Me:** No. Really... stop playing. What did you want to tell me?
**Friend:** I'm gay.
**Me:** Wait...Oh my god, you're serious?? I'm so sorry! I was just joking. I didn't think you were really going to say that you're gay.
**Friend:** Haha. It's ok but yeah.. Are you okay with that? Can we still be friends?
**Me:** Dude. I don't care if you're gay or not.
Yeah. He was really worried that we weren't going to be friends afterwards. It was a bit awkward (mostly my fault for joking about it) but we're still best friends.
Multa Nocte (she/tiger quoll) 2 months ago
And yet it is still sad that someone in this day and age has to worry that someone will no longer be their friend if they find out that they are gay.
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Anthony Elmore 2 months ago
I was lucky enough to get to skip the whole, awkward friend reveal since most of my friends were part of the local LGBTQ youth group. The conversations went something along the lines of "Dude, did you know Anthony's gay?" "Honestly, I kinda figured."
Beak Hookage 2 months ago
Reminds me of that scene from He Died With A Felafel In His Hand. "I have something to declare. I'm gay." "Hey, could you pass the sweets?" "...I said I'm gay." "Yeah okay."
JimothyGoodswell 2 months ago
love the support. Bestfriends should support no matter what. This person is a true friend :)
Celtic Pirate Queen 2 months ago
I think it's interesting that so many people come out and everyone says, "Yeah. We know". Like, sometimes it's pretty obvious.
Rex-a-Roni 2 months ago
This is kinda sweet, but I'll never understand why "being gay" is punchline.
Lee Gilliland 2 months ago
A good many of them honestly think they're going to lose friends, it's sad.
Something else to look out for is changes in one’s tone of voice. As Time magazine points out, when a person is nervous, their vocal cords might tighten up in response to the stress they feel. So, their voice becomes very high-pitched. Hearing a creak in an individual’s voice or them clearing their throat may be signs of dishonesty.
On top of that, someone who suddenly raises their voice may be doing so because they’re lying and getting defensive.
Other things to note are folks who use suspicious phrases such as “honestly,” “let me tell you the truth,” and “I want to be honest with you. That’s alongside overusing filler words such as “uh,” “um,” and “like” to buy more time to figure out what to say next while lying.
#7
On Wednesday, a customer asked me why our produce section was so empty, especially in terms of stuff like lettuce. I told him that it was because of extreme weather in Spain, where we source most of our stuff from. He cut off my explanation with "why does it matter what's going on in Spain, we're in Scotland?".
Mel in Georgia 2 months ago
Our shelves will probably not be empty, but just wait for the answer why produce will be so much more expensive in the US. Tariffs? No one to pick produce here?
WindySwede 2 months ago
and their faces when they realise they pay the tariffs... 5.12.21-Sh...dience.png 
Tom Brincefield 2 months ago
The number of people in the world who have no idea just how their food gets to them is staggering.
Lee Gilliland 2 months ago
I had one acquaintance who didn't know that Argentinian wine came from Argentina and then wanted to know why Eva Peron didn't object. And was astonished that she was dead. Evita is her favorite movie.
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Joe Publique 2 months ago (edited)
The customer sounds like he paints roundabouts and shouts at hotels.
Cold Eagle 2 months ago
Given their inability to put two and two together, I can only hope the staff member explained that this is where they source the stock from. In the hope that there was no misunderstanding.
#8
An old roommate wanted me to start paying more in rent because he was trying to save up to buy himself a house.
Janissary35680 2 months ago
"So am I. So I guess neither of us pays rent. I'm sure the landlord will understand."
#9
Someone once told me that men were superior to women because they had bigger brains, therefore, they were smarter.
It wasn't really awkward for me because I just continued laughing at him.
Hobby Hopper 2 months ago
Statistics show no significant difference in general intelligence between the sexes.
Beak Hookage 2 months ago
Rats have a brain that wouldn't fill an eggcup yet are some of the smartest animals on the planet. This guy has a brain that's clearly only big in order to provide hungry cannibals with a more generous portion size.
Cpt. Christan "Panda Bombero" 2 months ago
Ummm... I am going to theorize, that he is one of those "Alpha Males" or "Sigma Males". You know, the ones that want to make sure that you know & understand that they are. By directly telling you how they are so superior, every chance they get.
nicholas nolan 2 months ago
Um, I don't like to say things like superior, but everyone knows men are smarter than women because we go to college to get more knowledge and girls go to Jupiter to get more stupider. (obviously a joke based on the playground rhyming chant, but I figure I'd better point it out)
Broadly speaking, people are fairly good at judging liars. The caveat is that you’re capable of doing this subconsciously. Meanwhile, it’s your conscious mind that throws a spanner in the works, according to research.
Lies can be categorized into three main categories:
- Lies of commission, where a person is actively telling false statements
- Lies of omission, where someone fails to disclose information that is relevant
- Lies of influence, aka character lies, which are used to create misleading or false impressions, even if the statements aren’t necessarily untrue. Lies of influence can be used to state something unrelated in order to cover up untruths
#10
A girl I was seeing told me she didn't believe in dinosaurs.
Edit: her issue with dinosaurs wasn't so much creationist denial as much as it was a belief in a marketing scheme companies invented to sell dinosaur toys. Also the toy companies must've planted fossils, because how else did they get there...
Rich Black 2 months ago
this one has religious origins. some fundamentalists are convinced that fossils were buried there by god, "to test our faith"
John Dilligaf 2 months ago
honestly that conspiracy theory makes more sense and is more believable than most anything creationists come up with .
Power puff scientist 2 months ago (edited)
your name and bio are literally about dragons being real...
Load More Replies... #11
First day on a new job, my boss was discussing standard office policies. He said, "And I'd like to point out we have an open door policy here."
I said, "Oh, great! So if I have a problem I can come to you?"
He said, "No, I mean keep your office door open at all times."
Oh.
Beak Hookage 2 months ago
What, leave my office door open and risk having someone interrupt my executive naptime?
Ace 2 months ago
I've worked in places where a closed office door meant "do not disturb", so it's not that unusual, but yeah, should apply to the bosses as well - always did when I've encountered it.
LinkTheHylian 2 months ago
My old boss had an open-door policy too. Which was funny as he didn't have an office.
#12
I posted this before but - I was on a first date with a guy I met at work and things are going good til his phone starts ringing and he tells me to be quiet because it was his wife...
BrunoVI 2 months ago
"Oh HI MISSUS KRUPKE!!! IT'S ANGELA, FROM WORK!!! I'M SO GLAD YOU HAVE AN OPEN MARRIAGE! YOUR HUSBAND IS GREAT!!!! YOU'LL HAVE TO TELL ME IF YOU KNOW ANY TRICKS IN BED THAT HE LIKES!!!!"
Load More Replies... Earonn - 2 months ago
Shouting "What do you mean, your wife, (his name)? We're on our usual date!"
Anthony Elmore 2 months ago
Right? You should it the moment "Hey, honey!" comes out of his mouth. "Wait, what do you mean 'wife'? Why would you go on a date if you already have wife?"
Load More Replies... Celtic Pirate Queen 2 months ago
Oh, I would be SO obnoxious. Loudly saying "Baby, hang up the phone and come back to bed".
Ozymandias73 2 months ago
And why would one hold their laugh for that? That's not funny. Hopefully the lady called it a night and excused herself...permanently!
What is the most ridiculous, bizarre, or awkward thing that someone has ever told you that seriously made you think they were either lying or joking? What happened next?
Do you think you’re fairly good at picking up on liars, or do you tend to believe everything and anything others tell you? Share your thoughts below.
#13
When my daughter said she had been stung by a bee and it went all of the way through her. It turned out she had been stung on the chest and back at the same time.
Serena Myers 2 months ago
Fair comment, don't see why you were downvoted. Bees rarely, if ever, sting unless they are provoked or swatted, mostly gentle little buzzers. Unless OP's daughter disturbed a nest? We've lavender outside, and in the spring and summer the bees love it and they buzz around happily outside the front door. Nobody has been stung. Yet.
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I was at work, I work in retail, and me and my coworkers heard a loud "boom". But we didn't think anything of it.
5 minutes later, an older lady who is in the store almost everyday, maybe in her 50s-60s, came up to me and said " I just drove into your building."
I looked at her, and right before I began to laugh out loud, I realized she actually did.
Tucker Cahooter 2 months ago
Refreshing honesty on her part. Some people would probably try to blame the store for jumping into the path of the car.
Na Schi 2 months ago
Can completely imagine this. Or the building not being lit well enough to be seen in time.
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Jenny Barton 2 months ago
We heard a boom and we didn't think anything of it and then we were completely surprised to discover there had been a car accident.
#15
Manager: "Remember how Kathy (coworker) said her back was hurting and she went to the hospital for appendicitis? Well she didn't have appendicitis."
Me: "Did she have pneumonia?"
Manager: "No, she had a baby"
Me: "HA. Right. So what did she really have?"
Manager: "A baby"
Me: "oh"
Earonn - 2 months ago
Happened to a friend of our barmaid. Left work for backpain, had to call her parents from the hospital to let them know that they're grandparents now. Our pub collected a bit of money for her. Everything ended well, her parents weren't idiots and her boyfriend stood by her. I think they had another child afterwards.
NancyandCharlie Miller 2 months ago
Hopefully the second child was intentional!
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arthbach 2 months ago
A similar thing happened to a friend's sister, Carys. She is a large woman, both in height and circumference. Carys went on holiday to Spain and came home with a bebé. The baby was fine, but mammy was rather shaken by the experience.
arthbach 2 months ago
Whilst I really do believe the people this has happened to, I still find it amazing. With my first, I knew I was pregnant in 10 days, and it was 3 days with the second. My body just felt so different.
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MargyB 2 months ago
After I had scrubbed independently for a Caesar for the first time, I was asked, what was it? I had been so focused and nervous that I replied "A Baby", not realising they meant the s*x of the baby. I didn't even know the s*x, I was too busy focusing on the instruments!
Philly Bob 2 months ago
At least it wasn't a potato... although a lot of newborrns look like a bloody pototo at first.
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Lee Gilliland 2 months ago
Hey, I was six months pregnant and the doctors were insisting he was an ulcer until we did a barium x-rey and there was the skeleton.
Brittania Kelli 2 months ago
You know it's possible for a woman to still get her period while pregnant, right? That not all women get the usual symptoms like morning sickness or gaining significant weight? I knew a very intelligent and well educated woman who this happened to.
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#16
When I was 18, I went with my then girlfriend to Las Vegas to meet her parents (we were in Florida where she lived with her aunt and uncle). I found out that her dad and mom lived in separate houses right across the street from one another for whatever reason, which was strange but definitely not the strangest thing that would happen that trip. Her dad came over to her mom's house to meet me and I couldn't help but notice he was dressed in a suit. I thought maybe he was just a fancy dresser. He kept asking me questions about my family and how I felt about his daughter. He seemed to like me, and we went through the trip on fairly pleasant terms, but nothing else happened of any note.
Once we get back home to Florida, my girlfriend decides to tell me that her dad thought we were coming out to Vegas to get married and he dressed up because he was planning on taking us to get married that day. She had to tell him that we had no intention of getting married in Vegas.
Mel in Georgia 2 months ago
What other reason would one come to Vegas? I mean, you could be married by Elvis!
highwaycrossingfrog 2 months ago
Being in a couple doesn't mean you *have* to live together. My partner of 7 years and I intentionally live apart. Our houses are half a mile from each other, so we can see each other as often (or as little!) as we like. It's called apartnering and it's not that uncommon. It would be nice if it were more socially accepted though. Not everyone wants to be on top of each other all the time.
Michael Largey 2 months ago (edited)
The are enough risky ventures available in Vegas already without getting married.
detective miller's hat 2 months ago
This happened to a girl I knew in college. No clue she was pregnant, didn't even make it to hospital to have the baby, ended up having it in her bathroom. Both mom and baby were fine. Girl was raised very strict Mormon, so her sęx ed had left rather a lot to be desired.
Rich Black 2 months ago
there has to be some sort of preceding phone conversation which led to this conclusion.
#17
I worked at a bookstore and a customer asked why the hardcover and paperback versions of the same book didn't cost the same amount.
I chuckled and said, "I guess I'll have to look into that." He came back to me 5 minutes later and asked if I had found out yet.
liam newton-harding 2 months ago
Once had a customer ask, "Where's your trilogy section?"...My brain vapor-locked.
LinkTheHylian 2 months ago
"Excuse me, where's the self-help section?" "If I told you that would defeat the point."
#18
When I was in middle school there was a period of a few weeks when kids would fake seizures to get a laugh. It was the hip thing to do.
So, I was at the mall toy store one day and I came around the corner of an aisle and saw a kid a little younger than me on the ground.
I delightfully shouted, "DUDE, YOU ARE GOOD!"
I'll never forget his parent's faces when I looked up and figured out what was really happening.
Rod 2 months ago
Similar thing happened to me at a LARP during a banquet.... My friend and I thought he was simulating being poisoned and started to compliment him on his role playing when we understood. Fortunately another player nearby was an intern and took care of him and he was totally fine. We felt so bad about it and apologized profusely. He said it was OK and actually kinda funnny. I still feel bad about it....
PeepPeep the duck 2 months ago
One of those moments that replays in their mind nightly before sleeping 😔 🤦
#19
I was taking a long leg cast off a kid about 2.5-3 years old. After I get the cast split open and pull it off, mother says, "Oh, his toe fell off". I'm like, "heh, nice one". The kid was in the cast because his small toe had been nearly amputated and reattached; the doc was hoping what tissue was still connected would be enough to vascularize the distal portion. It wasn't
Alison Hobbs 2 months ago
S**t wasn't censored! What magic did you use on BP to make that happen?
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Paula Smith 2 months ago
Child’s surgery to reattach his toe was unsuccessful and it fell off as the doctor was removing the cast.
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Crissy Newbury 1 month ago
As a nurse I have had elderly diabetic patients’ toes fall off because gangrene.
#20
I asked a coworker with what his son's name was, and he answered Legolas. After two seconds of laughing I realised he wasn't laughing. His son is actually named Legolas.
Mel in Georgia 2 months ago
They're not the first person to name a kid after a favorite fictional character, but sometimes this is the reaction you get. Nickname Lego?
Rika 2 months ago (edited)
A relative once called to announce the birth of her son, Gaylord. My grandmother laughed and said, "No, what's his real name ?!" Everyone at the time (especially women) knew about Gaylord Hauser as a diet plan to lose weight. We always joked it was good that relative only had one kid because the other one would've been called Weight Watchers. Edit: We're from a non English-speaking country. Gaylord is a very rare name here, most people only ever heard it because of the diet plan.
Roxy222uk 2 months ago
I’ve never heard of the Gaylord Hauser diet plan; is it named after a person? Or it’s basic principles? Gaylord used to be a name in England but currently is out of fashion
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T'Mar of Vulcan 2 months ago
I know a guy whose name is Aragorn. (He was born long before the LotR movies came out - his parents loved the books.) When FB still required you to use your real name, he was threatened with banning for having a made-up name. He had to send them a picture of his ID to prove his name really was Aragorn!
SCP 4666 2 months ago
Like the one time when Game of Thrones was all the rage and all the newborn girls were named Khaleesi
Mrs.C 2 months ago
I met my first Kalesi (that's how her's is spelled) this school year. While I was ready for something other than Adelyn, Adilyn, Adelyn, and Adylynne, I feel for the kid.
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Cindy Brick 2 months ago
... and no, they don't call him 'thor' for short.
Load More Replies... Celtic Pirate Queen 2 months ago
My daughter's sister in law. She called her son in from the yard, "Attila, dinner!" I started cracking up. I said, that's an interesting nickname. It wasn't a nickname. Turns out Attila is a very popular Hungarian name. Oops.
Lee Gilliland 2 months ago
My best friend had aunts named Melanie and Scarlett, she was named Norma (Desmond, do NOT ask me what her mother was thinking), her sisters were Shirley (Temple) and Deanna (Durbin) and her granddaughter is named Kahleesi. *Sigh*
Sam Trudeau 2 months ago
Honestly, if the friends are LOTR fans, not a terrible name. Now he has to learn archery though
#21
On my 25th birthday, my new-ish boyfriend told me he was going to "surprise me" and do something special as a birthday dinner. He told me to get dressed up and wait for him around 7. I was super excited to wear a dress for once, got all dolled up and was eagerly waiting for him. When he showed up, he was wearing jeans and a T-shirt and just holding a grocery bag with store-bought sushi. I laughed, thinking this must be a pre-cursor to the actual 'big night out'. Nope, we just ate store-bought sushi in my living room. It was actually a pretty nice time but he shouldn't have hyped it up so much.
Mel in Georgia 2 months ago
I love me some take out sushi, but definitely wouldn't have dressed up for the occasion!
Seadog 2 months ago
Hopefully she saw that red flag and moved on to better.
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Auntriarch 2 months ago
A fancy dinner at home all dressed up is good, as long as you are expecting just that
Lee Gilliland 2 months ago
I was going to say at least he tried but that wasn't much of a try.
#22
A man was regaling his fellow party-goers with his drunken jokes. He described being found as a newborn in a field, after his teenage mother hid her pregnancy and gave birth at home. All he knew about her was she was a Waffle House waitress. We sat there, enthralled, waiting for the punchline, until we realized he'd moved from "life of the party" onto the "in vino veritas" stage of drunkenness.
Teutonic Disaster 2 months ago
Please tell me he's named Moses and is into extreme marathons...
#23
I saw a largely pregnant woman, and made a stupid comment about "bet you can't wait to get that out of you!" She said "eh, not really. The baby doesn't have a heartbeat and I'm just waiting to have the still birth.".
Lukas (he/him, it/its) 2 months ago
OP was apparently also pregnant and just trying to make small talk waiting for an OBGYN appointment, oh man, I'd feel absolutely awful.
Auntriarch 2 months ago (edited)
So really understandable question, not just some random nosy person... But you'd still want to rip out your own tongue after saying it.
Load More Replies... Multa Nocte (she/tiger quoll) 2 months ago
It's one of the many reasons people are cautioned not to assume that a pregnant-shaped person is actually pregnant and comment on it to them.
WindySwede 2 months ago
now I understand the comment (a week ago) stating not to ask before you can hear the baby scream.. 😥
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Laserleader 2 months ago (edited)
Have a diabetic belly and boy shape, and a lady I once worked with would ask me if I was pregnant every time she saw me for years. She thought every woman is supposed to have babies and couldn't understand why I never did but I always had a tummy. She wasn't skinny herself. Didn't want to explain my numerous health conditions and zero desire to reproduce, so I would always say, "Nope, still just fat."
Jane Doe-Doe 2 months ago
That’s why you should never ask a woman if she is pregnant or any questions about being pregnant
Mel in Georgia 2 months ago
Oh man. There would be so many ways to make a inadvertently terrible comment on a pregnant woman in this situation.
Faye Bosworth 2 months ago
And this is yet another reason why abortion needs to be legal. You just never know what can happen, and no woman shouod have to go through this if there's another option.
Sue User 2 months ago
About 20 years ago my friend was pregnant. She felt somethibg was off but the doctors said everything was fine. When she had the child, they told her it died in chilfbirth but she could tell.
Load More Replies... Justanotherpanda 2 months ago
Kind reminder to be very careful with your questions towards pregnant women.
Rich Black 2 months ago
is this really true? i always heard that a fetus death causes a spontaneous miscarriage.
#24
Met a guy, and I told him my name. He said "I'll probably not remember it; I have memory problems." I said "Haha yeah, I'm bad with names too." Met him again two days later, and I remembered his name. He, on the other hand, didn't remember meeting me. And when I realized it wasn't a joke, and was told by his mother that he actually does have memory problems, I felt like an idiot.
Oh well, he doesn't remember me laughing at him.
JK 2 months ago
I think OP meant that the guy didnt remember that OP thought they were joking and laughed when the guy said they didnt remember them. I dont think OP was saying they laughed at them having a memory problem.
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Gabby Ghoul 2 months ago (edited)
I have trouble remembering humans' names. The names of dogs I meet at the park, on the other hand ...
Brian Droste 2 months ago
I am getting older so I am having a little bit of a problem remembering things myself.
#25
My boss tends to not really think before she speaks, so she says some pretty funny stuff, but about half the time, she's dead serious.
A few off the top of my head:
"My son has light hair because I dyed my hair while I was pregnant" (nevermind that her husband is blond)
"Don't leave open cans of soda in the fridge, that's how you get hepatitis".
These were both vehemently defended until google proved her wrong.
Stephanie Did It 2 months ago
Reminds me of the lady who got a nose job so her baby wouldn't inherit her original nose.
Mrs.C 2 months ago
Worked with a woman who didn't comprehend a thermostat. She turned it all the way up in the winter and all the way down in the summer. She constantly stressed over her electric bill and complained that it was too hot/too cold in her house. It took us weeks to explain it to her. She also never had her oil changed. Like ever. Her car died and they found sludge when the mechanic started tearing into it.
Crissy Newbury 1 month ago
Just like eating porridge puts hairs on your chest, eating raw pastry gives you worms, and swallowed chewing gum will wrap itself around your heart and choke you.
Rich Black 2 months ago
relatives of the boss need some sort of job. celebrate them for what they know, not what they don't
#26
Realtor here. Buyers offered goats to sweeten their offer.
arthbach 2 months ago
There was a guy who rescued a couple of pygmy goats. He was training as a teacher in Canada and interviewed for a teaching position in a First Nations school. The interviewers asked if there might be anything that could prevent him from accepting the position (if offered). He explained he'd have to secure a property with some land for his goats. A few days later, he was sent an offer, and included in it was a house with grazing rights for animals. Unsurprisingly, he took it.
Pferdchen 2 months ago
What is the opposite of ESH? I ask because everyone in your anecdote are a credit to humanity.
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Con O Cuinn 2 months ago
My uncle's house came with 3 donkeys. Not an option, if you bought the house you were agreeing to home and care for the donkeys.
Zig Zag Wanderer 2 months ago
I was offered two cows with my current home. They were both pregnant, I found out later. I sometimes wish I'd accepted, but I was busy working then.
S Bow 2 months ago
I've frequently offered chickens, but nobody has accepted yet.
Load More Replies... Rich Black 2 months ago
if you have a weed problem, these guys could pay for themselves in a jiffy
#27
I met a guy who's studying engineering with me and he mentioned to me he's part of the flat earth society.
I laughed at first but he didn't laugh with me, we ended up having an hour long debate, no matter what I said, he wouldn't believe me and I learned he believed in almost every conspiracy theory out there.
We're still friends but we don't mention politics or anything like that anymore, he's also a trump supporter despite the fact that we live in South Africa.
Wij 2 months ago
What kind of technician, who you would think accepts scientific theory, could be that….. dumb?
Ace 2 months ago
There are quite a number of scientists who believe in the supernatural (a God) so...
Load More Replies... Jane Doe-Doe 2 months ago
Someone who believes the flat earth theory is bad enough, I think I could cope with that BUT a Trump supporter, no, that would be the end of the friendship ( I am also not American!!)
Tucker Cahooter 2 months ago
OP should have realised that trying to debate with such a believer is just a waste of time. The only way they *might* change their mind is if you launch them into space so they can see for themselves
Multa Nocte (she/tiger quoll) 2 months ago
I believe they would still find a way to say that they only see the outline and therefore it's still flat.
Load More Replies... Lee Gilliland 2 months ago
You ever been in the military? I think they assign roommates in inverse IQ just for giggles.
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A.J. 2 months ago
I was taking evolution class and a student got very angry because he didn't believe in evolution. Why taking this class if you don't believe in it?
bntxy64kf8 2 months ago
As a graduate student IN SAN FRANCISCO, I worked with a PROFESSOR that taught evolution, but did not "believe" in it.
Load More Replies... Reemerger 2 months ago
I reckon it's a refuge for people who desperately want to feel smart by pretending to be smarter than their interlocutor by claiming to have unraveled a mystery the other was not even aware of. I just like reading books.
Mel in Georgia 2 months ago
I have met otherwise seemingly smart and normal people who believe in the craziest things. It's hard to know how to respond.
Anthony Elmore 2 months ago
It's surreal, isn't it? It's gotta be a blind-spot thing or like how nobel peace-prize winners are susceptible to going down the rabbit hole.
Load More Replies... liam newton-harding 2 months ago
Can you let us know what devices/buildings he is "engineering", so we can stay the f@ck away from them?
#28
After finishing an otherwise flawless interview, we shook hands, and I said "Thank you sir"
She replied "Ma'am".
Mel in Georgia 2 months ago
You could still consider it flawless if you just corrected yourself graciously.
Shayna 2 months ago
I'd just say I was so nervous that I blurted out sir. I'm guessing OP knew who their interviewer was and likely that they were a ma'am.
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Dave Pearson 2 months ago
In 2025 no one knows what the F pronouns to use, everyone gets offended.
azubi 2 months ago
I can't see how the difference could be relevant in a professional environment, so....
Anthony Elmore 2 months ago
The main relevance is that one is correct, and the other is not.
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#29
Worked at a pet food store. A women came in and asked where to put topical flea medicine on her kids, Frontline, I laughed way too hard. She complained to my manager, who also laughed.
Reemerger 2 months ago
Just put a drop each on their necks where they can't lick it off, easy.
Mel in Georgia 2 months ago
Awww, I'm imagining a poor family who's dealing with a flea infestation from their untreated pets. No laughing is required to help them with this problem.
Abel 2 months ago
"Do you have a medicine for my casually black plagued family please? Bubons are starting to be annoying!"
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Littlemiss 2 months ago
Its a treatment for nits for years. Heard of families whose kids are constantly getting them. Sometimes it works depending on how advanced the nits are. I've heard of ones that are immune to most treatments.
Auntriarch 2 months ago
Try oil, vegetable oil or whatever you have in the kitchen, apply to hair and scalp. Leave it on overnight. The oil gums up the lice breathing holes and they suffocate.
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Day Andie 2 months ago
Anybody in this thread that's acting surprised that someone would make the assumption that Frontline can be used for flea infestations on humans just hasn't been paying attention lately. It's Ivermectin, people! The answer is always Ivermectin.
Anonymouse 2 months ago
I had heard that they used to use flea collars as ankle bracelets in vietnam, so...
Valegro 2 months ago
Yeah no. 1: Why would a PET STORE stock flea/lice remedies for people?? and 2: Frontline literally has a photo of a dog/cat on the container/box, if it doesn't it usually specifies what size of dog it is for. This woman doesn't have a "lack of knowledge" - she has a lack of basic reading and comprehensive skills
Load More Replies... #30
A new co-worker came up to me one day and said "What comes after 999?" She got offended when I laughed - turned out she had a learning disability and couldn't make the cognitive leap from 9 to 10. She also wore two watches so she could know what time it was where her boyfriend worked (we were in CST and her boyfriend worked in EST).
Mel in Georgia 2 months ago
Learned from a commenter here that dyscalculia is a thing. I'm not good at math, but this person could not do a simple problem. It's not to be laughed at.
Stephanie Did It 2 months ago
I'm one those people. I'm excellent with words and language, but numbers are very difficult for me. You know those cognitive tests they sometimes do in medical offices, where they ask you to count backwards by threes? I just answer, "No, I cannot. Next question." I get some weird looks for that.
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Roxy222uk 2 months ago
Oops, thought of the UK emergency number and wondered what kind of existential question it was
Dave Pearson 2 months ago
The two watches thing is quite sweet. Inhave two clocks on my phone for the same reason as I work all over the world, and its easy to forget what time zone I am in and when is a good time to call home.
Marie BellaDonna 2 months ago
Or to set an entry in the world clock of your smartphone.
Load More Replies... Dr Jimmy 03 2 months ago
Not voting up or down yet, in hopes that OP made abject apologies about not understanding the disability.
#31
I went on a date with a dude in high school and he told me that he had astral projected himself into my dreams for the past few weeks.
Idk man.
Bill Swallow 2 months ago (edited)
Tell him he got a wrong number, because he never showed up in your dreams. Then bribe the biggest football player on the school team to tell him, "Dude, you'll never guess what a weird dream I've been having about you..."
Multa Nocte (she/tiger quoll) 2 months ago
“Wait, You’re Serious”: 40 Times People Said Unbelievable Things That Were Actually True" So, BP, you are saying he actually astral projected himself into her dreams?
Dragons Exist 2 months ago
A better way to phrase the title would be "40 Times People Said Ridiculous Things And Weren't Joking"
Load More Replies... sfgothgirl 2 months ago
Uhhhh, there's a bit more to this story if you click the link to the OOP over on Reddit. But you might want to just be glad you don't know
Teressa Reeves 2 months ago
So of course I had to check it out. Whoa... that was quite a ride!
Load More Replies... Cpt. Christan "Panda Bombero" 2 months ago
Yeah..."I have been stalking you, in your dreams." Hopefully that was your only date with him, before he decided to go from astral stalking to physical stalking.
#32
I was at a Kobe Steakhouse (Teppanyaki, like Benihana's) and as always, it was the birthday for a girl across the table. She was there with her mom and probably a good friend. Anyway, once the table realized it was her birthday and we all wished her a good day, she asked me how old I thought she was. If I were putting money on it I would have said 13, but I figured she'd feel good if I said I thought she was a bit older, so I guessed 16. She got "mad" and said "No! I'm 20!!" I laughed. She didn't. Then I realized she was serious. Now every time my friends and I go to Kobe Steakhouse, we bring it up.
Multa Nocte (she/tiger quoll) 2 months ago
I have learned to never answer the question "How old do you think I am?" because they are either doing it so you'll tell them they look younger than they are if they are older, and older than they are if they are younger. You truly can't win.
[>.<]/ 2 months ago
I always add at least 10 years to my honest guess. That usually shuts them up.
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Mel in Georgia 2 months ago
She will end up appreciating her youthful looks, as I eventually did. But it is annoying when you're taken for a kid or a know-nothing young person.
Cadena Norton 2 months ago
I once carded a girl for cigarettes. Tiny little thing decked out in full hello kitty barely looked 16...she was 50!!!
Bartlet for world domination 2 months ago (edited)
I remember a woman in front of me in the line being carded for a bottle of champagne and being absolutely thrilled. "Best birthday ever! I'm 41 today!" Poor teenager behind the counter had no idea.
Load More Replies... Beak Hookage 2 months ago
I'm almost 40 and people regularly assume I'm in my 20s. I still get asked for ID at the bottle shop despite having a bunch of very visible tattoos. It always amuses me, and doubly so because I don't give a rat's rear about trying to maintain a youthful appearance. I don't wear makeup or dye my hair, or have a skincare regime or go on healthy morning jogs with a bowl of bran and half a grapefruit afterwards, etc etc. Nope, just a quirk of genetics apparently. Even my friends who are younger than me regularly forget that I'm not the same age as they are.
Jan Rosier 2 months ago
My dad had a thing for guessing ages, at the most he was one year off. So when that question came he always answered "you donot want me to answer that", and then when they insisted, he answered what he thought was right and not what they wanted to hear...
BadmanMonkey 2 months ago
What made me laugh most was that the extra explanation in brackets made me even more confused.
Brian Droste 2 months ago
I have a young female friend that is early twenties. She is kinds small and petite. You look at her and didn't know she was in her early twenties you would think she was a teenager.
#33
Wife asked if she could get some essential oils for our diffuser. I said sure, how much? She said "125$", and I laughed and was like "Nah for real". "Seriously", "125$". She cried and I laughed. Proceed to sleep on couch.
Celtic Pirate Queen 2 months ago
You can go to the local head shop and get essential oils. They do not have to be blessed my Tibetan monks.
Rich Black 2 months ago
they are on sale at Amazon for $9.99 on Prime day. Lavender and Peppermint.
#34
Flight Attendant here: got asked if we have diabetic wine. Did the haha part and he was serious.
Awkward.
Mel in Georgia 2 months ago
So looked it up ... guess he was asking for a dry wine, as in not sweet?
Anthony Elmore 2 months ago (edited)
Probably. Poorly worded on his part, but a valid concern for diabetics. Wines, spirits, beer, ect doesn't have to list nutritional facts so It's a guessing game for us when it comes to taking enough insulin that we don't give ourselves high blood sugar, but not too much so we end up with low blood sugar. It's easier with straight liquor but can be a nightmare when flavoring or other aspects are added.
Load More Replies... BadmanMonkey 2 months ago
I read it as the laughter arising from the expectation that there would be a wide selection of wines on board an aircraft (with very limited space...and no wine cellar).
#35
Her: "I'm going to Oklahoma State because I didn't get into Texas Tech.
Me: "Hahahaha"
Her: "What?"
Me: "I liked your joke. Everyone gets into Texas Tech."
Her: "I didn't."
Me: *walks away*.
Mel in Georgia 2 months ago
If it's anything like Georgia Tech, not everyone gets accepted. Not sure I get the joke.
nottheactualphoto 2 months ago
Some state schools are pickier than others.
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#36
I was a waiter and guy said his wife wanted to take me home. I had never heard of anything like that before.
Philly Bob 2 months ago
Apparently her box was to go... wanted the waiter to fill it?
Load More Replies... #37
One time my science teacher was talking about solar powered remote control race car races and my friend asked me "Was the race held inside or outside?".
Grumpy old man 2 months ago
If its light powered it can be inside a gym or cafeteria. Not a dumb question
Fat Harry (Oi / You) 2 months ago
It could also use solar to charge a battery.
Load More Replies... highwaycrossingfrog 2 months ago
Kinda stupid to ask your friend a question about a race the teacher is talking about ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Load More Replies... Con O Cuinn 2 months ago
Robotics course in my university had a competition with solar powered automated cars. It was held in our canteen. You don't necessarily need direct sunlight for them to work, the ambient light was fine.
#38
See one of the managers, realize they haven't been around in a few days.
"Hey, how was your vacation?"
- "Not great, I was at my dad's funeral."
*laugh*
*she's not laughing*
*oh*
Heir of Durin 2 months ago
Hmm. I don’t think I’d assume this was a joke. I don’t know many people who would joke about attending a parent’s funeral.
Multa Nocte (she/tiger quoll) 2 months ago
I know. I am a little alarmed that their go-to reaction would be to laugh at a comment like this.
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Glenn Cuneo 2 months ago
I went back to teaching after chemo radiation, and surgery for colon cancer. Lost about 80 pounds-- everyone was asking how I lost the weight... ."Cancer" they clamned up pretty quick.
#39
My friend told me her cat died and I laughed at her because it was April Fool's day. It wasn't a joke though.
Inigo Montoya 2 months ago
Even worse, why would they laugh? It's not funny and they probably aren't joking. At least ask if they are serious
Load More Replies... Jane Doe-Doe 2 months ago
NOT at all funny, I don’t get why you would think that she was joking
ErrorCode404Sans 2 months ago
If someone did that to me I would hide inside their walls until they fall asleep then go stabby stab on them
Colleen Glim 2 months ago
My oldest daughter was born on April fools day. For my entire pregnancy everybody swore she was a boy. April fool!
#40
Female age 42 says she wants a tattoo. I ask her what she's getting.....a horse head with the words " I love horses ".
AKRaven 2 months ago
Only thing I can think of is the scene from The Godfather?
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Upstaged75 2 months ago
"I love horses" is something a 12 year old writes on her school notebook. I have a horse tattoo, but I'd laugh at any adult who actually put those words on their body.
Joe Publique 2 months ago
This probably isn't the flex you think it is...
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What do you think ?
Sarah 2 months ago
What? What’s the H OL O- Caust? [explanation give to him by me] no..I never heard of that, when did that happen? Kitchen conversation with 33 yr old flatmate
Mel in Georgia 2 months ago
Oh my. I'm sometimes dumbfounded by how poorly informed some people are. It's like they've been living under a rock somewhere.
Load More Replies... Lee Gilliland 2 months ago
Is there a problem on BP? I keep getting thrown off and am having trouble posting.
mria alternativa 2 months ago
It's been happening all day for me, got it working after resetting (and accepting a few more...) cookies.
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Rich Black 2 months ago
i attended a religious service once and the pastor told everyone they were going to hell. It turns out he was serious.
Sarah 2 months ago
What? What’s the H OL O- Caust? [explanation give to him by me] no..I never heard of that, when did that happen? Kitchen conversation with 33 yr old flatmate
Mel in Georgia 2 months ago
Oh my. I'm sometimes dumbfounded by how poorly informed some people are. It's like they've been living under a rock somewhere.
Load More Replies... Lee Gilliland 2 months ago
Is there a problem on BP? I keep getting thrown off and am having trouble posting.
mria alternativa 2 months ago
It's been happening all day for me, got it working after resetting (and accepting a few more...) cookies.
Load More Replies... Rich Black 2 months ago
i attended a religious service once and the pastor told everyone they were going to hell. It turns out he was serious.
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