We all deserve love and to be loved. I mean, is it too much that we’re asking for? But if you've ever walked in the shoes of a singleton, and at some point we all have, you know what a blessing and a curse it may be. Let’s face it, the dating game is not for the faint-hearted, no matter what the media and apps that people download and delete in a cycle of despair and hope would tell us.
In fact, a Pew Research survey showed that most of those on the romantic hunt, which makes up 15% of American adults who are single and looking for a relationship, are dissatisfied with their dating lives. How come?
Well, the answer lies somewhere between the lines of real-life stories from people who survived the most awkward date. And although the degree of awkwardness varies substantially from one date to other, anyone who’s had a bad one came out of it with a fun (hopefully fun) memory to talk about.
Thanks to Twitter user Steven Glansberg, who asked “What’s the most awkward date y’all ever been on?” we now have a collection of honest answers that tick all the boxes for a well-made drama film. Psst! After you're done, make sure to check out our previous post with the worst first date stories right here.
In a sense, every date is like your first date. The nervousness is real, but the level of it varies from person to person. Some see it as a test they want to pass real badly, others go with a more relaxed approach and see where the encounter takes them.
So previously, Bored Panda contacted Susan Winter, love coach and author of “Breakup Triage: The Cure for Heartache,” to find out what she has to say about nailing the dating game. It turns out, even if the impulse to create romantic relationships exists, the skill set to do so may not. Susan said that there’s been an increasing loss of capacity for clear communication and clarity of "dating purpose."
According to Susan, it’s important to know what you want and how you want it: “Without mental clarity, there is no emotional clarity.” Firstly, “we must know what we want out of a relationship.” And secondly, “we must define those goals to our perspective mate, using language they understand, e.g. 'I want a partner,' or 'I'm just looking to have fun.'"
When asked whether people still date in these unprecedented times, the relationship coach assured us that they indeed do, but nobody really calls it “dating” anymore. “This seems to be a resistance to the term itself. 'Dating' may feel too formal a word for some people who'd rather say they're hanging out, or hooking up,” she explained.
Meanwhile, more and more singletons are now getting into doing "proper dates." Susan explained: “Old-school protocol can seem interesting and new wave when it's a novel departure from the norm of nondescript get-togethers.”
“If your partner takes the time and energy to plan a great date, then you know they have the capacity to invest time and energy into a relationship.” So no date should be overlooked. Planning a first date is a way to show that you're invested in making a good impression. “Plan in advance. Know your partner's preferences: their likes and dislikes. Be creative. Be thoughtful. Be kind,” suggested Susan.