49-Year-Old Mom Happily Shares How She Adopted A Child Recently But The Internet Starts Shaming Her
Meet Kris Monsour, a happy mom to a beautiful 2-year-old toddler named Ainsley. But her journey to motherhood was not an easy one to begin with as she shared it on TikTok.
“Being told at 41, after my latest miscarriage, that I would never be a mom and to ‘accept my fate,’” the caption said in a video she posted on her TikTok channel @thevintageparents which already amassed a total of 9.4M likes. The second part of the video shows happy Monsour lovingly holding her daughter and the caption says “me at 51 with my two-year-old.”
Shockingly, many commenters showed no empathy to Monsour’s story and instead, used the comment section to share shaming remarks. And you wonder how come people can be so blatantly cruel.
More info: Instagram | TikTok | Beacons.ai
This woman was told she was never going to be a mom after a miscarriage 10 years ago
But at 49, Monsour adopted a girl, filling her life with the joys of motherhood
Image credits: thevintageparents
Image credits: thevintageparents
The stigma around older mothers is still pretty strong in our society. But the science is debunking it by showing that children of older mothers have fewer behavioral, social and emotional difficulties.
This recent research printed in “The European Journal of Developmental Psychology” showed promising outcomes for young children born to older moms. It suggests that older women tended to punish their children less by verbal or physical means. The patience these women cultivate throughout their lives comes into play, which they then offer to their children. As a result, their children don’t suffer from behavioral issues at as high of a rate as other children.
She has been sharing her journey on her TikTok channel The Vintage Parents
@thevintageparents However motherhood comes to you, it’s a miracle. #thevintageparents #adoptionstory #miscarriage #thevintagemom #whatalie #miscarriages ♬ What a time by Niall Horan and Julia Michaels – ana.tpwk
There may be many reasons to why are older moms more patient and less likely to lash out, such as the fact that they’re likely more financially stable and finished with their education. Their career path is set, or they’re in a position to stay home full-time. Because of the previous advantages, older moms may have better access to prenatal care and healthcare in general.
Image credits: thevintageparents
Moreover, the authors of the same research found that age alone plays a huge role in how moms parent. It is believed that as women grow older they tend to be more tolerant of others and more flexible. This may come as a huge benefit for a child whose mother is aware of not only their, but also their own emotional wellbeing.
Image credits: thevintageparents
It’s no secret that women are put under immense pressure in our society, especially when it comes to marrying and having children, in general. “These days, women feel the pressure to ‘do and have it all.’ We feel that we are expected to be able to have a successful career, provide financially, have a happy marriage, and be a full-time parent,” Jane Parker, an Advanced Relationship Coach, told Bored Panda.
But some people shared nasty comments on the family’s TikTok channel
“Women also have higher expectations to be physically attractive and have a stronger need to be nurturing and empathic. Self-care can take a major back seat for some women when trying to achieve all of this,” she explained.
Although pressure to get married varies in different cultures and religions, Parker feels that the pressure for women to get married is greater than for men, which is interesting as women are more independent now than ever before. “Parents, often, very much want to become grandparents, and so, that pressure is more on women than men. The fertility rate in the US is lower than it has been in 35 years.”
Luckily, at least some people showed their support for the mom who felt heartbroken
Despite all the hate, they are a happy and loving family, cherishing all the moments they spend together
View this post on Instagram
View this post on Instagram
View this post on Instagram
The comment "too old to grandparent." Did they really mean, "too old for me to drop my kid off all the time so that I don't have to raise them"??
WOW. Some of the comments are very negative. Why not adopt a child when you're 50? If you can give a child a happy, secure and loving home then go for it. Women have had babies at an older age and those children are fine. Maybe it's tough that you could lose a parent at 20 or 30 but that happens regardless of age. Car accidents and illness lurking around the corner sucks at any age.
Yup. Better than a 20year old who accidentally got pregnant and has no clue about life herself yet.
Load More Replies...
Some seriously f***ed up comments on here. 49 is not old. 70 is not really that old. Unless she is still working full time, she is likely to have more time to look after a child and give them more love and opportunities than someone in their 20s or 30s. If she has taken early retirement, she will be in an even better position to be a full time parent. Quit being so judgemental!
well 70 is pretty old, to be fair. it 70 isn't old, what is?
Load More Replies...
My 30 something mom died when I was 3. There is no guarantee in life. These are the same people that would say she should adopt and don't be selfish for wanting her own. She was selfless and adopted another human that needed love and a home.
Ikr? My parents had me in their twenties and my father died when I was 18. These people on tiktok are just toxic
Load More Replies...
The outrage at this disgusts me frankly. My father was 55 when I was born. He retired when I was around 8 and as a result was able to be around to be around much more than most fathers in my neighborhood. I believe his wisdom made me who I am today. He passed away when I was 16, and while I would love more time with him, I would never give away what his wisdom did for my character. People are so judgemental nowadays smh.
I’m sorry you had to lose him. Many fathers have time to give, but I think it’s admirable that he gave you the time that mattered the most. God bless you both.
Load More Replies...
Women can never win when it comes to ageism. 20 too young. 30 you're too focused on a career. 40 getting up there. Nearing 50 and too old. Women are not bananas. We don't have this 1 minute of perfect ripeness then BOOM hit the old folks home. Go ahead and adopt. There's so many kids in need of adoption. For those concerned about kids having to take care of aging parents. Not all 70 year olds are in such poor health they need geriatric care. Some people may not ever need it. Also people can die at any time, any age really, so any kid is at risk of losing parents regardless. Parents can become disabled at any time. My boyfriend takes care of his severely disabled parents who are in their 50s and need full time monitoring and care. It can happen to anyone.
THISS! People say that motherhood is a difficult job/thing to do and they should be ready for taking care/parenting child(ren) but when they do in their 'old' age, they're selfish?? This is why aliens dont come near earth
Load More Replies...
Sometimes I feel like people's mentality is "Someone is extremely happy? We simply CANNOT have that. Let us deflate that s**t, stat!"
Definitely. For some, I think it makes them subconsciously realize they may have rushed into having children too early for the wrong reasons. The knee-jerk reaction is to target someone else's actions as the "incorrect" way to settle their own minds.
Load More Replies... I have stronger feelings about using children for internet clout, tbh. A digital footprint is forever and 2 year olds can't consent to that. As for her age, if she'd given birth at 49 would people still be freaking out? It's not like anyone can just go adopt a baby, they have to be considered fit parents first.
I follow her. People would absolutely be freaking out if she gave birth at 49, I’ve noticed a lot of the judgy comments assume the baby is biologically her’s. As far as using the baby for clout I don’t think that was ever her intention. Her channel grew very organically and not all the videos are even about the child.
Load More Replies...
I don't see why anyone has a problem with, they look happy just leave them alone for goodness sake
I was 49 when I adopted my then godson when his teenage homeless parents weren't able to provide for him and neither of their families would take him in. I had already been caring him for three years through foster care. Do you think it would have been better for me to turn him over to the system and abandon him one more time? I don't.
"Oh no, two dads poor child has no mum." "Oh look, two mums, no father figure." "Damn are they young, they should enjoy life before having a famliy." "That woman is so old, she shouldn't raise a child, she will D - I - E soon !!" How about we spend all that time and energy helping children who really need it ? There are financial problems, addiction problems, violence, etc. in so so many families with a mum and a dad with the "perfect" age to parent.
Exactly. Thank goodness these comments have no real power over others.
Load More Replies...
"it's better this child spend a lifetime of being unwanted and unloved and bounced around and abused then you give her a solid upbringing and maybe die young.". That's what you nasty mean shits are saying. For the record. My partner is a widower who's wife died when his children were 13 and 14 and she was in her 30s.
Absolutely. My husband was hit and killed 2.5 years ago. He was 46. Kids are 17, 13, and 9. Life is never a guarantee and this baby has an amazing home instead of being stuck in the system.
Load More Replies...
I can understand that people are "worried" regarding the fact that yes, the child may lose her parents or have to sort out elder care etc at a younger age than most. But put it this way. Growing up in and out of foster care, or in a home, is far more damaging. At least this child will have the opportunity to grow up loved. And that will make them a far better person.
My Dad was pushing 40 when I was born and I lost him to cancer when I was 30. But you know what, I would have chosen him to be my Dad a thousand times over even if I lost him at 10, 15, or 20! The wisdom and life lessons he taught me and the love he gave me are irreplaceable. I would rather have my amazing Dad for a shorter amount of time than to have someone who paled in comparison as a parent for twice as long. We don't judge people who have genetic predisposition for life threatening diseases for having children in their late 20's (when the disease may shorten their lifespan significantly and be passed to their child) so why shame a woman for adopting a child in her 50's and providing it with a loving home for the rest of her life!
too old to grandparent made me want to punch the writer b/c what they mean is they want free babysitting.
Ikr, the irony and the audacity to call that woman selfish 🤡
Load More Replies...
Excuse me, but she is a fast better and far sweeter parent and person than any of these negative community comments. I'm sure some have their basis in losing a parent. But my dad died when I was fifteen and he was forty eight. It happens. She has quality parenting. Yay team.
As every parent-to-be, you should reflect, if you will have the Ressources (money, energy, time, patience...) to rise a child, bevor you Do it. This may be harder or easier if you are older. I think it is always two-sided
Agreed. I'd be easily exhausted and have insufficient energy for a small child. Though I have far more patience today than I did at 20.
Load More Replies...
As a 26-year-old single woman who began the adoption process for my infant 2nd-cousin when I was 20 years old... I totally relate to all the judgement this mother is getting. My adopted son is now 5, and he is generally very happy and healthy. Granted, since I'm technically his 4th mother (if I'm counting the foster mothers that he has no concrete memories of anymore) he does still have some abandonment issues, but those decrease with each successive year of stability and love. A young 21 year old single mother isn't ideal for any child, so at first I hesitated to open my home. But then I asked myself, are his alternatives better? They weren't. People need to be supporting this child in her new home instead of tearing her parents apart for their age.
You are an amazing woman. Wishing you and your son a life richly blessed. ❤️
Load More Replies...
The comments on here are hideous. Who says that age has anything to do with being a good mother? Apart from maybe being financially stable and settled in your life. If you have love to give then society should stop frowning on you because you aren't 20 anymore. Fgs, my mother had me at 20 and I lost her to breast cancer at 40. Death doesn't care how old you are! Good luck to this lady and her little girl.
My Dad passed at 43 from an aneurysm. We were 20, 16, and 15. Death does not discriminate. However, adoption is a wonderful blessing for all involved. Celebrate the good in this story people!
This infuriated me. This woman should be allowed to share her love with a child if she wishes to. I've had the opposite problem - I don't want children, never did, and one of my GYN's told me flat out that I might want to have one at age 50 because a patient of hers did. WTF. Can these people not make up their minds? Childfree folks like me get told they're selfish all the time, so what is it? D*mned if you do, and also if you don't? Gee whiz. Thank goodness I'm almost home free at 45.
Wow. My mom died when I was 25. She was 53. Get over yourselves, people. Parents die all the time.
There are children without parents sitting in foster care waiting on a loving family. I don't care if the adoptive parent or parents are old,young,man,woman,gay, straight, or any color under the son as long as they can provide a loving healthy home for the child I see absolutely nothing wrong with them adopting. The children deserve to know what a loving family is. Anyone saying otherwise undoubtedly has no heart or love in themselves to give
Not many 25 year olds out there adopting the half million children in foster care on a given day, thousands of whom age out with No parents and immediately become homeless. But sure, hate on this woman because 49 is too old to adopt. Close your mouth unless you are taking these kids in when they age out, or at any age, really.
Most care homes are staffed by dedicated, hardworking and caring people but they are often overworked and lack resources they would like. Anyone that wants to and can provide loving home and family to those children should be allowed to. Even the best care home cannot replace being in a family.
I LOVE my father he was 60 when i was born. Seeing an older parent decline is very hard. It is much different than losing a parent to a car accident 😕
Young people can get dementia or other degenerative illnesses
Load More Replies...
Unreal. My mother was 45 and my dad 50 when they had me. Mom just passed a few weeks ago, but my dad is turning 88 next month. I regret nothing of their age. If anything, I welcome it. Not many people in their 30's can proudly say their parents survived WWII. I swear, these days morons are some a dozen, to shame older parents, when they know nothing about the subject matter. Makes me sick to my stomach. P.S.- I love and miss you mom. ❤️
Those people are real garbage. Bless this woman and her family. It's a great thing they did and I'm sure they'll give the little girl a great upbringing and life.
My mother is in her 70s and I love her very much. I didn't/don't have to take care of her and I don't see that as something she will ever let me do. My father and her have made it quite clear they want to live on their own until they pass, and that they make any necessary decisions. If something happens and a decision has to be made that wasn't planned for - they have people listed to handle things that are NOT their children. She's never been unable to do something I wanted/needed her to do because of her age. She takes care of her four active grandchildren regularly. Shame on all of you acting so ugly, it's disgusting. To any of you geriatric parents out there who parented these idiots - I'm so sorry.
This is the risk of exposing your life on the internet. It is full of dead people, evil people, who did nothing out of their lifes. None of those people ever moved a finger to help a child, to save a life, to do some good. And they think a 60/70yo person is a useless corpse shitting itself who needs to be put in a nursing home. You can learn a lot about these people families.
.........live well w/ your child folks and have fun.................
Lady, you and your husband are loving parents my mama was 60 + when she adopted me , and she even went as far as allowing my birth mother to be apart of my life as well . so i speak from personal experience that baby is just fine, and you two are going to be a great and wonderful influence in her life. You two most definitely will be in my prayers, and heart. God Bless you and your love for that precious little bundle of joy....
Many decided youth was for mothering and old age was for wisdom. Idiots. Honey, if the other women envy you, hate you, but still respect you, then you’re doing it right. As a young woman, you have fabulous freedom, and never find yourself in regret, then competing against other parents for self-worth. She lives through her children, but she’s silent when you’re the one achieving YOUR dreams. And when you get old, surrounded by grouchy empty nesters, lacking sense of self, and wishing they’d raised their kids better, you know the joy of children, and don’t need to say a word about who’s the best parent. Your wisdom and patience helps your children become their best. You win at your children’s life because you first won at your own. Even when they lose you, they’re better off than ones raised by idiotic ego-driven social media parents of hellspawn of today, and ones in foster care. A spinster, darling, becomes the wisest woman in the room. Richly rewarded. Be her.
To all the people who feel sorry for the child, why? The child gets all the love and care in the world. You don't know if you live to be 70 or 100, so stop being mean and be happy for the child. Do you believe the child would be better off at a orphanage, or in the foster care system?
I think the little girl is lucky to have older parents. They probably have their $h*t together better than a 20 year old. I had my son at 20. I wish I could do it all over again with the knowledge I have now. I would've made a lot smarter choices. And for those saying how selfish of them and how they will be so old by the time she graduates....Yeah...how selfish of the fact that they are probably close to retirement and will be able to give her their undivided attention..gee..what horrible parents they will be....SMH
it doesn't matter what age a parent dies and the age of their children. death comes for us all at any time. being the youngest i was the one who my siblings decided would take care of mom and dad. lost mom5yrs ago but dad is doing just fine. also, it doesn't matter what age you lose your parents - it's still traumatic. all my friends lost both of theirs by the time they were 30. i'm 65 and losing mom after a literal life time of having her nearby was devastating. same will be when dad goes.
I was born when my mother was 41 (and my bro was born two years later). I count myself lucky every day that I had my parents for as long as I did. My dad died when I was 35 and my mom when I was 38. They had long lives and both died pretty suddenly (dad declined and died in a span of six months after the medical aid made him switch blood pressure medications and mom developed a stomach pain on a Thursday and was dead by Saturday - we think it was an ulcer or hernia that ruptured). But then I think of some of my ancestors whose parents died in their twenties or thirties. I'm still lucky.
When you are against abortion but shame a woman that wants to adopt! Always the fetus but screw the born child! Downvote me if you want but I have two adopted daughters. Bless this woman for giving this little girl some semblance of a family!
To paraphrase George Carlin: "If you're pre-born you're fine; if you're preschool, you're effed."
Load More Replies...
Wow, imagine adopting a child with the intention of giving them the warm, loving home they deserve only to just be age shamed? Ugh Some people are just trash. How much you want to bet none of these haters ever considered adopting?
I think what matters is that this child has a happy loving family, who cares what some people say.
Had my surprise rainbow blessing at 44, his grandparents are well into their 70's and adore him and "grandparent" just fine, hell my mother in law can still swing a sledgehammer and work a jackhammer.
My mom didn't start having kids until she was in her late 20s. She had 8 of us between then and her late 40s and I couldn't ask for a better mother. People don't need to be young to be a good parent
Wonder how many of these c***s who post negative comments ever did anything other then being a twat?
My parents adopted me in their 40s. I'm now 21 and my parents are 64 and 68. I don't think they did anything wrong or that their age affected w their ability to parent me
Oh my God, i just read the comments and i can not believe how mean people can be. you can never be to old to adopt a child and give him a loving home. N E V E R. How do the people that say such mean things even live with themselves. they suck such big time
Nasty behaviour honestly. My grandma adopted my "cousin" (technically uncle but we call them cousins cuz they're our age), he's 18 now and she still works at a school, she used to take care of 8 kids at one point and she was 60. She should say "thanks but you're doing worse than me lol" cuz as someone WITH YOUNG PARENTS, they had NO idea what they were doing and ask ME advice on their relationship. Literally. The other day they asked ME if they should get divorced or sell the house. Like bruh I'm in college I'm not tryna figure out your guys's s**t for u.
people saying that older people shouldnt adopt because they'll die soon must all come from a magical land where women never die during childbirth
F*ck the haters. A kid with parents that actually want them is better off than being in the system, hands down. Old or not, at least this mom is aware of what it takes to be a mom. That is already miles ahead than most "younger" biological moms I've seen.
My children are grown, and my husband was 67 in November. We all expected him to be around for many years, he only had aches and pains. On March 23rd he had a sudden cardiac event and was gone in seconds. My middle child found him the next morning, in his chair. Luckily his eyes hadn't glazed over yet so he looked like he was awake, but of course he wasn't. I'm just glad she didn't have to see him after the eyes had glazed that would've been worse. I'd just had surgery that day on my arm so was in the hospital. When I found out the next morning, I checked out ama and went home. The point is 67 isn't really that old, and though he seemed in good health, he obviously wasn't. It can happen anytime at any age. His brother died at 23(cancer) and nephew died at 9(cancer).
My husband was born from older parents and I can tell you that he is a unicorn. I have never met someone who is so kind, loving, gentle, and overall amazing. His parents are amazing. I have one of the greatest mother in laws in the world and it lets me know there doesn't need to be a ticking clock for having a baby either.
All I can say is those negative comments were clearly born by people who simply had negative parental experiences all together. I'm 55 and can still outrun my 10 year old grandson and his Friends. Some People are just plain nasty and look for the worst in everything. Wish this woman and her family much happiness
To the OP you are amazing and I’m so glad you were able to have a child ! To the haters stfu most of you can’t even begin to fathom what she went through and probably most of you are miserable parents anyways so back the fu k off .
Be a hell of a lot better parent than those 22 moms with 3 kids. GTFOH
My ex was 48 when we got our first kid. I'm 51 now. Lol no wonder he was so tired.
As an orphaned child, who was later adopted by an amazing family, and now a proud father of an adopted child myself, I have ONE THING to say to those disgusting people making hateful comments: You're all cowards hiding behind your anonymous thinking your opinion matters. You are an embarrassment to your life. You have no soul.
23 year old here who was adopted at 18 months by someone who was 50 at the time the adoption went through! This sickens me that my mom, a single parent, probably had people thinking this about her. I don't know where I'd be if not for her.
Working in home health, I see a lot of people living well into their 80's and 90's independently. Being 49 is not too old. Also, as a child of a mom that was only 20 years older than me, she had a lot of growing up to do which did more harm than good. In addition to that I lost my mom when she was 47 years old. So yes, death can happen at any time. No matter the age it is traumatic to lose a parent. Just because you are older, doesn't make it easier.
No one knows how much time they have, so judging this woman is ridiculous. I had friends who had parents die when we were in elementary school, and I have known people whose parents lived into their 90s. My mom had me at 31 and her last child at 40; the youngest died at the end of 2020, my mom is still around. Health issues can arise at any point, and when I was an assistant teacher there was a nine year old boy in my classroom who had to help his mother (late 20s-early 30s) who couldn't get out of bed most days due to kidney failure. No one is guaranteed even one more day, but every child deserves to feel wanted and be loved, and there's no doubt this little girl will have that.
People suck. She loves her kid and that's all that matters. Everyone who's hating I hope that you never have kids until your sixty.
That comment about how the kid's gonna be 20 and picking out her parents nursing home, when she's 20 the mom will be 68. Can people do math? If you think that you're going to be in a nursing home before you're 70 then I feel sorry for you.
My sister and I were 6 years old when our adoptive parents adopted us, they were 53 and 51, and gave us both a good life.
My dad was 51 and mom was 43 when they adopted my sister; I was 16. They had already raised three kids and knew what they were doing. The folks hating on this woman apparently don't know that ageism is discrimination. Now there's a dirty word nowadays. I doubt that any baby/child now available for adoption would have objections to a loving parent with a little gray hair and a couple of wrinkles. Parenting is about what's in your heart not what you look like.
So many "wise" millennials showing their asses. As usual. This woman is happily raising a lovely daughter and all the punks can do is crap on her. For shame. But these people haven't been taught shame. If they had they wouldn't be dragging this proud mother.
This just made me soooo angry!!! We are 53 n raising our almost 3 yr old granddaughter....how dare some of these commenters claim selfishness 🤨🤔🤬 of the parents!!!! Would it be better for this beautiful lil girl be bounced around foster care?!!! We certainly didn't plan to be raising a baby at this age but I know I definitely have more patience at this age than I did in my 20's!!! I've also met people who were raised by grandparents and they are thriving n successful n said they were soooo thankful!!!
My dad died before I was born. He was 35. My friend's dad died when she was 15. He was also in his 30s. If "you might die" is a reason not to adopt/have a child, then not a single person on this planet should have kids. Young age is not a guarantee you will love, and old age is not the only cause of poor health.
My parents had me in their 40's and they were the best parents I could have ever had! 50 is definitely not "too old" to care for a child. As long as you're able to provide that child with everything they need and love and support them then who cares what age you are?
I am 69 and have raised 4 children and 4 grandchildren ( for over 20 years) and still have one living here and one while he goes to college. Grandparents are the best parents I think. I have taken very good care of them and love them very much. Not to mention kept them from being separated and living in foster homes.
My mom had me when she was 19 and my dad was 22. When she was 25 she remarried to someone who was 19. I have had 4 different stepmoms of various ages ranging from 25-45 throughout my childhood. I've had about 10-15 different parental figures depending on if you're keeping it in the family or also including parents of very close friends. Older parents are better. They may rely on you sooner than you'd like. But they also provide for you better in youth. I have absolutely no interest in helping my mother with CHF or my stepdad with diabetes and such nor my mother's younger sister. I have a hard time with my father. I know my mother is kinda trying now, but her abusive ways of interacting with her kids is very ingrained still. I can't talk to her without being insulted. Most of my stepmoms were really awesome though. Most of them had their own (younger than me) kids too and the step siblings clearly had a healthier relationship with rheir parents and Outlook in general.
Women can never win. Judged when wanting kids and when they don't. It's ridiculous, really
Honestly, I'm less worried about her dying and more about how the daughter will adjust at school. My parents were essentially a generation behind everyone else's, I never really managed to integrate like everyone else did. But then I'm from a small town and everyone else in my class had parents who'd grown up together, so maybe that was part of the issue too.
How many GRANDPARENTS are raising their grandchildren?? Does anyone get disgusted that the older person has to now be responsible for someone they did not bring into this world? And now that the MAGA MAGGOTS have decided no one can get an abortion, WHO do you think is going step up and take care of all those kids? This country is doomed if we stop adoptions to "old" or "gay" or "singles" or anyone who has "compassion". If you want to stop abortions and then only "allow" certain people to adopt, this nation better turn some of their empty warehouses into "homes for the unadoptable". WAKE UP people, your nation is getting flushed down the toilet by your lawmakers!!
My MIL was 42 when my wife was born. She's an only child; they'd been trying for a decade. Her pregnancy came as a complete shock to her--she went to the doctor because she wasn't feeling well, they did a pregnancy test as part of the workup, and guess what? Both my inlaws are gone now--FIL passed in '17 at 80, MIL passed in '18 at 89. My wife had a lot of older cousins who could help out with babysitting when my inlaws needed a break. Because of my MIL's age when she had my wife, she's an only child, but I know none of them would have changed a thing.
Who's being selfish? 30 used to be considered old for having a baby, now it is the norm. You can loose your parents at any time in life. Too old to grandparent comment, your grandparents would have been too old and your parents managed.
If the child is well cared for, loved, and supported in every way by her parents. Then who cares about their age? It's not like she loves her any less and I don't see any younger adults adopting children very often. If they adopted a child and saved her from years of torture then praise them people.
The negativity is unreal!! I doubt this was a rash decision. I rather think she stewed on it for a long time. Lot's of people have babies in their late 40s and fifties. Go them! I don't agree the comments about how the child will have to prepare to deal with the death of her parents. What about those children who lose their parents who had them in their teens, 20s, 30s? They won't necessarily be prepared for it. I was 29 & 31 when I had my children. I was diagnosed with cancer when I was 36, and again with terminal cancer at 39. I'm still here at 45, but I'm not preparing my children for my death. I'm too busy living our lives and making memories... exactly what the family in the story are doing, I bet.
My parents adopted me in their late 50s. My adopted mother died right after I turned 9 (after 2 years of being in a nursing home. My adopted father is now 70 and his health is badly deteriorating quickly. Of course I'm glad I got a family for a minute, but it's fair to say that I will be an orphan way before everyone else I know. My kids will never had grandparents and I will never have my own family at my wedding (if I choose to marry or have kids) it's not all about patience and care. It's about know when to not let your want for something outweigh another persons needs. Maybe she's in great shape and will be a good mother. But the comments arents that far off either.
The negative comments are ridiculous. My cousin in his 20's just lost his mother, she was only 45 her death was hard on everyone not due to her age but because love she provided. Her son is set, she left him a 3 bedroom 2 bath fairly large home, 3 vehicles, and enough money to pay bills monthly and still live a moderate yet budgeted life if he chose not to work. However his mother's work efforts rubbed off so he works in the gov. just like she did and will be fine. Literally none in my family said a word to me when I had my first baby at age 16. But when I had my 3rd at 31 some asked if I was done? Like really! I'm financially stable and retired at 41, and perfectly healthy. I am done but that's only because my youngest son has autism and needs my care 24/7. My husband and I don't feel it would be fair to bring another child in and not give it the full attention our others received. It's not about age, it's about the stability you provide, while alive and after!
This is the reason I really hate social media. Tiktok is the worst. Those ppl are hateful trolls with no life They can only wish to be this awesome woman and her pretty baby. Screw them and y'all live your best life together
The number one lesson she should learn here is don't use tiktok. People are friggin crazy.
Screw it. Been there have a wife that 16 years younger than me and I am mother of a 2, 4, and 7 year old at 38. My grandma had my mom at 36. Further my mother has 8 year old twins my nieces because their parents both died in a car accident she's in her 50s . Stop judging they are all happy and them wanting a baby makes them appreciate her more. Why don't you start by looking at your life people. These people have every right to love their child no matter their age. Btw I am a woman. Chew on that internet trolls
Why are people so mean? Lovely family. Go be blessed and enjoy your beautiful family!❤️
those who decided to have children, better make sure you are all set financially with insurance and heritance to the child. Age doesn't matter.
happy for her, sad for the kid... also, my friend and his wife want to adopt, but theyve been told their only option is to adopt a child with severe disabilities; because theres just too many children born with disabilities that are surrendered by their parents... theyve considered private adoption, but havent had any luck. 😔
My aunty married young. She passed away when she was 36 and my cousins were 15 and 7 and her husband passed away 2 years later making them orphans. We all have stories of young people who die and leave their children. No one is sure to live tomorrow. You can be involved in a car accident, a bomb, plane crash, mass shooting, serial killing/homicide/murder, heart attack or suicide at any age. Death is a respecter of no person. So, I find those negative posts heart wrenching. People don't always choose to die. If death is fought with love or strength then lots of people would be alive. I wonder if the blame the parents of all orphans for dying.
So instead of going the irresponsible route and doing some disgusting IVF scifi garbage she ponies up, does the right thing, gives that kid a home, and all anyone can say "she's too old". I got news for you people, an elderly mother is better than a foster mother any day. Anyone who chooses adoption over natural birth is a freaking hero.
If some hag fish celebrity like Madonna literally BUYS children people clap like trained seals but condemn this...thats tragic.
Why do you have to call her a hag fish? Why can't you just comment on what she says or does that offends you rather than spouting off some sexist BS insult.
Load More Replies...
Losing your geriatric father st 13, while your geriatric mother suffers through all kinds of health issues your entire teenage years while your adult siblings just live their lives... it sucked! And dear old Mom left everything to the older ones when she died because she didn't want her menopause baby in the first place
I'm confused..it says she adopted the girl but then shows her in a photo with a hospital bracelet, in a hospital bed wearing a hospital gown holding a newborn. So she obviously gave birth to this kid! What?? Why did the article say the kid was adopted? I'm so confused
I'm 26, my sister is 23 and our parents are both almost 70, meaning they were already elders when we were in highschool. My mom said to me once, that when she was freshly over 40 and had us, she thought she'd manage just fine, but raising children is incredibly exhausting. Suddenly you're almost 60 and you have two teenagers, and many more health problems than you used to. From the children's perspective, being 13 and already seeing your parents aging and getting sick is heartbreaking.
Honestly I have to agree, to a point, that adopting such a young child at that age is incredibly irresponsible. Her body is in decline. By the time this girl is a teenager they won't be able to properly keep up with her. Theres a very real possibility they won't be alive to see her graduate highschool. If she'd adopted a decade earlier, I don't see the problem but at 51 you are much too old to adopt a toddler and be able to raise them without issue or die when they are far too young to lose a parent.
Tbh I agree about the selfishness, but that goes for any parent. Sure, afterwards they are required to be extremely selfless if they care at all, as a parent, but having a child in what ever way for yourself is selfish. Then again, who isn't selfish, but we are talking about a human being who will have no choice but to depend on you for their every need, and it's never a choice for the child, being born at all, nor who their parents end up being, etc.
The comment "too old to grandparent." Did they really mean, "too old for me to drop my kid off all the time so that I don't have to raise them"??
WOW. Some of the comments are very negative. Why not adopt a child when you're 50? If you can give a child a happy, secure and loving home then go for it. Women have had babies at an older age and those children are fine. Maybe it's tough that you could lose a parent at 20 or 30 but that happens regardless of age. Car accidents and illness lurking around the corner sucks at any age.
Yup. Better than a 20year old who accidentally got pregnant and has no clue about life herself yet.
Load More Replies... Some seriously f***ed up comments on here. 49 is not old. 70 is not really that old. Unless she is still working full time, she is likely to have more time to look after a child and give them more love and opportunities than someone in their 20s or 30s. If she has taken early retirement, she will be in an even better position to be a full time parent. Quit being so judgemental!
well 70 is pretty old, to be fair. it 70 isn't old, what is?
Load More Replies... My 30 something mom died when I was 3. There is no guarantee in life. These are the same people that would say she should adopt and don't be selfish for wanting her own. She was selfless and adopted another human that needed love and a home.
Ikr? My parents had me in their twenties and my father died when I was 18. These people on tiktok are just toxic
Load More Replies... The outrage at this disgusts me frankly. My father was 55 when I was born. He retired when I was around 8 and as a result was able to be around to be around much more than most fathers in my neighborhood. I believe his wisdom made me who I am today. He passed away when I was 16, and while I would love more time with him, I would never give away what his wisdom did for my character. People are so judgemental nowadays smh.
I’m sorry you had to lose him. Many fathers have time to give, but I think it’s admirable that he gave you the time that mattered the most. God bless you both.
Load More Replies... Women can never win when it comes to ageism. 20 too young. 30 you're too focused on a career. 40 getting up there. Nearing 50 and too old. Women are not bananas. We don't have this 1 minute of perfect ripeness then BOOM hit the old folks home. Go ahead and adopt. There's so many kids in need of adoption. For those concerned about kids having to take care of aging parents. Not all 70 year olds are in such poor health they need geriatric care. Some people may not ever need it. Also people can die at any time, any age really, so any kid is at risk of losing parents regardless. Parents can become disabled at any time. My boyfriend takes care of his severely disabled parents who are in their 50s and need full time monitoring and care. It can happen to anyone.
THISS! People say that motherhood is a difficult job/thing to do and they should be ready for taking care/parenting child(ren) but when they do in their 'old' age, they're selfish?? This is why aliens dont come near earth
Load More Replies... Sometimes I feel like people's mentality is "Someone is extremely happy? We simply CANNOT have that. Let us deflate that s**t, stat!"
Definitely. For some, I think it makes them subconsciously realize they may have rushed into having children too early for the wrong reasons. The knee-jerk reaction is to target someone else's actions as the "incorrect" way to settle their own minds.
Load More Replies... I have stronger feelings about using children for internet clout, tbh. A digital footprint is forever and 2 year olds can't consent to that. As for her age, if she'd given birth at 49 would people still be freaking out? It's not like anyone can just go adopt a baby, they have to be considered fit parents first.
I follow her. People would absolutely be freaking out if she gave birth at 49, I’ve noticed a lot of the judgy comments assume the baby is biologically her’s. As far as using the baby for clout I don’t think that was ever her intention. Her channel grew very organically and not all the videos are even about the child.
Load More Replies... I don't see why anyone has a problem with, they look happy just leave them alone for goodness sake
I was 49 when I adopted my then godson when his teenage homeless parents weren't able to provide for him and neither of their families would take him in. I had already been caring him for three years through foster care. Do you think it would have been better for me to turn him over to the system and abandon him one more time? I don't.
"Oh no, two dads poor child has no mum." "Oh look, two mums, no father figure." "Damn are they young, they should enjoy life before having a famliy." "That woman is so old, she shouldn't raise a child, she will D - I - E soon !!" How about we spend all that time and energy helping children who really need it ? There are financial problems, addiction problems, violence, etc. in so so many families with a mum and a dad with the "perfect" age to parent.
Exactly. Thank goodness these comments have no real power over others.
Load More Replies... "it's better this child spend a lifetime of being unwanted and unloved and bounced around and abused then you give her a solid upbringing and maybe die young.". That's what you nasty mean shits are saying. For the record. My partner is a widower who's wife died when his children were 13 and 14 and she was in her 30s.
Absolutely. My husband was hit and killed 2.5 years ago. He was 46. Kids are 17, 13, and 9. Life is never a guarantee and this baby has an amazing home instead of being stuck in the system.
Load More Replies... I can understand that people are "worried" regarding the fact that yes, the child may lose her parents or have to sort out elder care etc at a younger age than most. But put it this way. Growing up in and out of foster care, or in a home, is far more damaging. At least this child will have the opportunity to grow up loved. And that will make them a far better person.
My Dad was pushing 40 when I was born and I lost him to cancer when I was 30. But you know what, I would have chosen him to be my Dad a thousand times over even if I lost him at 10, 15, or 20! The wisdom and life lessons he taught me and the love he gave me are irreplaceable. I would rather have my amazing Dad for a shorter amount of time than to have someone who paled in comparison as a parent for twice as long. We don't judge people who have genetic predisposition for life threatening diseases for having children in their late 20's (when the disease may shorten their lifespan significantly and be passed to their child) so why shame a woman for adopting a child in her 50's and providing it with a loving home for the rest of her life!
too old to grandparent made me want to punch the writer b/c what they mean is they want free babysitting.
Ikr, the irony and the audacity to call that woman selfish 🤡
Load More Replies... Excuse me, but she is a fast better and far sweeter parent and person than any of these negative community comments. I'm sure some have their basis in losing a parent. But my dad died when I was fifteen and he was forty eight. It happens. She has quality parenting. Yay team.
As every parent-to-be, you should reflect, if you will have the Ressources (money, energy, time, patience...) to rise a child, bevor you Do it. This may be harder or easier if you are older. I think it is always two-sided
Agreed. I'd be easily exhausted and have insufficient energy for a small child. Though I have far more patience today than I did at 20.
Load More Replies... As a 26-year-old single woman who began the adoption process for my infant 2nd-cousin when I was 20 years old... I totally relate to all the judgement this mother is getting. My adopted son is now 5, and he is generally very happy and healthy. Granted, since I'm technically his 4th mother (if I'm counting the foster mothers that he has no concrete memories of anymore) he does still have some abandonment issues, but those decrease with each successive year of stability and love. A young 21 year old single mother isn't ideal for any child, so at first I hesitated to open my home. But then I asked myself, are his alternatives better? They weren't. People need to be supporting this child in her new home instead of tearing her parents apart for their age.
You are an amazing woman. Wishing you and your son a life richly blessed. ❤️
Load More Replies... The comments on here are hideous. Who says that age has anything to do with being a good mother? Apart from maybe being financially stable and settled in your life. If you have love to give then society should stop frowning on you because you aren't 20 anymore. Fgs, my mother had me at 20 and I lost her to breast cancer at 40. Death doesn't care how old you are! Good luck to this lady and her little girl.
My Dad passed at 43 from an aneurysm. We were 20, 16, and 15. Death does not discriminate. However, adoption is a wonderful blessing for all involved. Celebrate the good in this story people!
This infuriated me. This woman should be allowed to share her love with a child if she wishes to. I've had the opposite problem - I don't want children, never did, and one of my GYN's told me flat out that I might want to have one at age 50 because a patient of hers did. WTF. Can these people not make up their minds? Childfree folks like me get told they're selfish all the time, so what is it? D*mned if you do, and also if you don't? Gee whiz. Thank goodness I'm almost home free at 45.
Wow. My mom died when I was 25. She was 53. Get over yourselves, people. Parents die all the time.
There are children without parents sitting in foster care waiting on a loving family. I don't care if the adoptive parent or parents are old,young,man,woman,gay, straight, or any color under the son as long as they can provide a loving healthy home for the child I see absolutely nothing wrong with them adopting. The children deserve to know what a loving family is. Anyone saying otherwise undoubtedly has no heart or love in themselves to give
Not many 25 year olds out there adopting the half million children in foster care on a given day, thousands of whom age out with No parents and immediately become homeless. But sure, hate on this woman because 49 is too old to adopt. Close your mouth unless you are taking these kids in when they age out, or at any age, really.
Most care homes are staffed by dedicated, hardworking and caring people but they are often overworked and lack resources they would like. Anyone that wants to and can provide loving home and family to those children should be allowed to. Even the best care home cannot replace being in a family.
I LOVE my father he was 60 when i was born. Seeing an older parent decline is very hard. It is much different than losing a parent to a car accident 😕
Young people can get dementia or other degenerative illnesses
Load More Replies... Unreal. My mother was 45 and my dad 50 when they had me. Mom just passed a few weeks ago, but my dad is turning 88 next month. I regret nothing of their age. If anything, I welcome it. Not many people in their 30's can proudly say their parents survived WWII. I swear, these days morons are some a dozen, to shame older parents, when they know nothing about the subject matter. Makes me sick to my stomach. P.S.- I love and miss you mom. ❤️
Those people are real garbage. Bless this woman and her family. It's a great thing they did and I'm sure they'll give the little girl a great upbringing and life.
My mother is in her 70s and I love her very much. I didn't/don't have to take care of her and I don't see that as something she will ever let me do. My father and her have made it quite clear they want to live on their own until they pass, and that they make any necessary decisions. If something happens and a decision has to be made that wasn't planned for - they have people listed to handle things that are NOT their children. She's never been unable to do something I wanted/needed her to do because of her age. She takes care of her four active grandchildren regularly. Shame on all of you acting so ugly, it's disgusting. To any of you geriatric parents out there who parented these idiots - I'm so sorry.
This is the risk of exposing your life on the internet. It is full of dead people, evil people, who did nothing out of their lifes. None of those people ever moved a finger to help a child, to save a life, to do some good. And they think a 60/70yo person is a useless corpse shitting itself who needs to be put in a nursing home. You can learn a lot about these people families.
.........live well w/ your child folks and have fun.................
Lady, you and your husband are loving parents my mama was 60 + when she adopted me , and she even went as far as allowing my birth mother to be apart of my life as well . so i speak from personal experience that baby is just fine, and you two are going to be a great and wonderful influence in her life. You two most definitely will be in my prayers, and heart. God Bless you and your love for that precious little bundle of joy....
Many decided youth was for mothering and old age was for wisdom. Idiots. Honey, if the other women envy you, hate you, but still respect you, then you’re doing it right. As a young woman, you have fabulous freedom, and never find yourself in regret, then competing against other parents for self-worth. She lives through her children, but she’s silent when you’re the one achieving YOUR dreams. And when you get old, surrounded by grouchy empty nesters, lacking sense of self, and wishing they’d raised their kids better, you know the joy of children, and don’t need to say a word about who’s the best parent. Your wisdom and patience helps your children become their best. You win at your children’s life because you first won at your own. Even when they lose you, they’re better off than ones raised by idiotic ego-driven social media parents of hellspawn of today, and ones in foster care. A spinster, darling, becomes the wisest woman in the room. Richly rewarded. Be her.
To all the people who feel sorry for the child, why? The child gets all the love and care in the world. You don't know if you live to be 70 or 100, so stop being mean and be happy for the child. Do you believe the child would be better off at a orphanage, or in the foster care system?
I think the little girl is lucky to have older parents. They probably have their $h*t together better than a 20 year old. I had my son at 20. I wish I could do it all over again with the knowledge I have now. I would've made a lot smarter choices. And for those saying how selfish of them and how they will be so old by the time she graduates....Yeah...how selfish of the fact that they are probably close to retirement and will be able to give her their undivided attention..gee..what horrible parents they will be....SMH
it doesn't matter what age a parent dies and the age of their children. death comes for us all at any time. being the youngest i was the one who my siblings decided would take care of mom and dad. lost mom5yrs ago but dad is doing just fine. also, it doesn't matter what age you lose your parents - it's still traumatic. all my friends lost both of theirs by the time they were 30. i'm 65 and losing mom after a literal life time of having her nearby was devastating. same will be when dad goes.
I was born when my mother was 41 (and my bro was born two years later). I count myself lucky every day that I had my parents for as long as I did. My dad died when I was 35 and my mom when I was 38. They had long lives and both died pretty suddenly (dad declined and died in a span of six months after the medical aid made him switch blood pressure medications and mom developed a stomach pain on a Thursday and was dead by Saturday - we think it was an ulcer or hernia that ruptured). But then I think of some of my ancestors whose parents died in their twenties or thirties. I'm still lucky.
When you are against abortion but shame a woman that wants to adopt! Always the fetus but screw the born child! Downvote me if you want but I have two adopted daughters. Bless this woman for giving this little girl some semblance of a family!
To paraphrase George Carlin: "If you're pre-born you're fine; if you're preschool, you're effed."
Load More Replies... Wow, imagine adopting a child with the intention of giving them the warm, loving home they deserve only to just be age shamed? Ugh Some people are just trash. How much you want to bet none of these haters ever considered adopting?
I think what matters is that this child has a happy loving family, who cares what some people say.
Had my surprise rainbow blessing at 44, his grandparents are well into their 70's and adore him and "grandparent" just fine, hell my mother in law can still swing a sledgehammer and work a jackhammer.
My mom didn't start having kids until she was in her late 20s. She had 8 of us between then and her late 40s and I couldn't ask for a better mother. People don't need to be young to be a good parent
Wonder how many of these c***s who post negative comments ever did anything other then being a twat?
My parents adopted me in their 40s. I'm now 21 and my parents are 64 and 68. I don't think they did anything wrong or that their age affected w their ability to parent me
Oh my God, i just read the comments and i can not believe how mean people can be. you can never be to old to adopt a child and give him a loving home. N E V E R. How do the people that say such mean things even live with themselves. they suck such big time
Nasty behaviour honestly. My grandma adopted my "cousin" (technically uncle but we call them cousins cuz they're our age), he's 18 now and she still works at a school, she used to take care of 8 kids at one point and she was 60. She should say "thanks but you're doing worse than me lol" cuz as someone WITH YOUNG PARENTS, they had NO idea what they were doing and ask ME advice on their relationship. Literally. The other day they asked ME if they should get divorced or sell the house. Like bruh I'm in college I'm not tryna figure out your guys's s**t for u.
people saying that older people shouldnt adopt because they'll die soon must all come from a magical land where women never die during childbirth
F*ck the haters. A kid with parents that actually want them is better off than being in the system, hands down. Old or not, at least this mom is aware of what it takes to be a mom. That is already miles ahead than most "younger" biological moms I've seen.
My children are grown, and my husband was 67 in November. We all expected him to be around for many years, he only had aches and pains. On March 23rd he had a sudden cardiac event and was gone in seconds. My middle child found him the next morning, in his chair. Luckily his eyes hadn't glazed over yet so he looked like he was awake, but of course he wasn't. I'm just glad she didn't have to see him after the eyes had glazed that would've been worse. I'd just had surgery that day on my arm so was in the hospital. When I found out the next morning, I checked out ama and went home. The point is 67 isn't really that old, and though he seemed in good health, he obviously wasn't. It can happen anytime at any age. His brother died at 23(cancer) and nephew died at 9(cancer).
My husband was born from older parents and I can tell you that he is a unicorn. I have never met someone who is so kind, loving, gentle, and overall amazing. His parents are amazing. I have one of the greatest mother in laws in the world and it lets me know there doesn't need to be a ticking clock for having a baby either.
All I can say is those negative comments were clearly born by people who simply had negative parental experiences all together. I'm 55 and can still outrun my 10 year old grandson and his Friends. Some People are just plain nasty and look for the worst in everything. Wish this woman and her family much happiness
To the OP you are amazing and I’m so glad you were able to have a child ! To the haters stfu most of you can’t even begin to fathom what she went through and probably most of you are miserable parents anyways so back the fu k off .
Be a hell of a lot better parent than those 22 moms with 3 kids. GTFOH
My ex was 48 when we got our first kid. I'm 51 now. Lol no wonder he was so tired.
As an orphaned child, who was later adopted by an amazing family, and now a proud father of an adopted child myself, I have ONE THING to say to those disgusting people making hateful comments: You're all cowards hiding behind your anonymous thinking your opinion matters. You are an embarrassment to your life. You have no soul.
23 year old here who was adopted at 18 months by someone who was 50 at the time the adoption went through! This sickens me that my mom, a single parent, probably had people thinking this about her. I don't know where I'd be if not for her.
Working in home health, I see a lot of people living well into their 80's and 90's independently. Being 49 is not too old. Also, as a child of a mom that was only 20 years older than me, she had a lot of growing up to do which did more harm than good. In addition to that I lost my mom when she was 47 years old. So yes, death can happen at any time. No matter the age it is traumatic to lose a parent. Just because you are older, doesn't make it easier.
No one knows how much time they have, so judging this woman is ridiculous. I had friends who had parents die when we were in elementary school, and I have known people whose parents lived into their 90s. My mom had me at 31 and her last child at 40; the youngest died at the end of 2020, my mom is still around. Health issues can arise at any point, and when I was an assistant teacher there was a nine year old boy in my classroom who had to help his mother (late 20s-early 30s) who couldn't get out of bed most days due to kidney failure. No one is guaranteed even one more day, but every child deserves to feel wanted and be loved, and there's no doubt this little girl will have that.
People suck. She loves her kid and that's all that matters. Everyone who's hating I hope that you never have kids until your sixty.
That comment about how the kid's gonna be 20 and picking out her parents nursing home, when she's 20 the mom will be 68. Can people do math? If you think that you're going to be in a nursing home before you're 70 then I feel sorry for you.
My sister and I were 6 years old when our adoptive parents adopted us, they were 53 and 51, and gave us both a good life.
My dad was 51 and mom was 43 when they adopted my sister; I was 16. They had already raised three kids and knew what they were doing. The folks hating on this woman apparently don't know that ageism is discrimination. Now there's a dirty word nowadays. I doubt that any baby/child now available for adoption would have objections to a loving parent with a little gray hair and a couple of wrinkles. Parenting is about what's in your heart not what you look like.
So many "wise" millennials showing their asses. As usual. This woman is happily raising a lovely daughter and all the punks can do is crap on her. For shame. But these people haven't been taught shame. If they had they wouldn't be dragging this proud mother.
This just made me soooo angry!!! We are 53 n raising our almost 3 yr old granddaughter....how dare some of these commenters claim selfishness 🤨🤔🤬 of the parents!!!! Would it be better for this beautiful lil girl be bounced around foster care?!!! We certainly didn't plan to be raising a baby at this age but I know I definitely have more patience at this age than I did in my 20's!!! I've also met people who were raised by grandparents and they are thriving n successful n said they were soooo thankful!!!
My dad died before I was born. He was 35. My friend's dad died when she was 15. He was also in his 30s. If "you might die" is a reason not to adopt/have a child, then not a single person on this planet should have kids. Young age is not a guarantee you will love, and old age is not the only cause of poor health.
My parents had me in their 40's and they were the best parents I could have ever had! 50 is definitely not "too old" to care for a child. As long as you're able to provide that child with everything they need and love and support them then who cares what age you are?
I am 69 and have raised 4 children and 4 grandchildren ( for over 20 years) and still have one living here and one while he goes to college. Grandparents are the best parents I think. I have taken very good care of them and love them very much. Not to mention kept them from being separated and living in foster homes.
My mom had me when she was 19 and my dad was 22. When she was 25 she remarried to someone who was 19. I have had 4 different stepmoms of various ages ranging from 25-45 throughout my childhood. I've had about 10-15 different parental figures depending on if you're keeping it in the family or also including parents of very close friends. Older parents are better. They may rely on you sooner than you'd like. But they also provide for you better in youth. I have absolutely no interest in helping my mother with CHF or my stepdad with diabetes and such nor my mother's younger sister. I have a hard time with my father. I know my mother is kinda trying now, but her abusive ways of interacting with her kids is very ingrained still. I can't talk to her without being insulted. Most of my stepmoms were really awesome though. Most of them had their own (younger than me) kids too and the step siblings clearly had a healthier relationship with rheir parents and Outlook in general.
Women can never win. Judged when wanting kids and when they don't. It's ridiculous, really
Honestly, I'm less worried about her dying and more about how the daughter will adjust at school. My parents were essentially a generation behind everyone else's, I never really managed to integrate like everyone else did. But then I'm from a small town and everyone else in my class had parents who'd grown up together, so maybe that was part of the issue too.
How many GRANDPARENTS are raising their grandchildren?? Does anyone get disgusted that the older person has to now be responsible for someone they did not bring into this world? And now that the MAGA MAGGOTS have decided no one can get an abortion, WHO do you think is going step up and take care of all those kids? This country is doomed if we stop adoptions to "old" or "gay" or "singles" or anyone who has "compassion". If you want to stop abortions and then only "allow" certain people to adopt, this nation better turn some of their empty warehouses into "homes for the unadoptable". WAKE UP people, your nation is getting flushed down the toilet by your lawmakers!!
My MIL was 42 when my wife was born. She's an only child; they'd been trying for a decade. Her pregnancy came as a complete shock to her--she went to the doctor because she wasn't feeling well, they did a pregnancy test as part of the workup, and guess what? Both my inlaws are gone now--FIL passed in '17 at 80, MIL passed in '18 at 89. My wife had a lot of older cousins who could help out with babysitting when my inlaws needed a break. Because of my MIL's age when she had my wife, she's an only child, but I know none of them would have changed a thing.
Who's being selfish? 30 used to be considered old for having a baby, now it is the norm. You can loose your parents at any time in life. Too old to grandparent comment, your grandparents would have been too old and your parents managed.
If the child is well cared for, loved, and supported in every way by her parents. Then who cares about their age? It's not like she loves her any less and I don't see any younger adults adopting children very often. If they adopted a child and saved her from years of torture then praise them people.
The negativity is unreal!! I doubt this was a rash decision. I rather think she stewed on it for a long time. Lot's of people have babies in their late 40s and fifties. Go them! I don't agree the comments about how the child will have to prepare to deal with the death of her parents. What about those children who lose their parents who had them in their teens, 20s, 30s? They won't necessarily be prepared for it. I was 29 & 31 when I had my children. I was diagnosed with cancer when I was 36, and again with terminal cancer at 39. I'm still here at 45, but I'm not preparing my children for my death. I'm too busy living our lives and making memories... exactly what the family in the story are doing, I bet.
My parents adopted me in their late 50s. My adopted mother died right after I turned 9 (after 2 years of being in a nursing home. My adopted father is now 70 and his health is badly deteriorating quickly. Of course I'm glad I got a family for a minute, but it's fair to say that I will be an orphan way before everyone else I know. My kids will never had grandparents and I will never have my own family at my wedding (if I choose to marry or have kids) it's not all about patience and care. It's about know when to not let your want for something outweigh another persons needs. Maybe she's in great shape and will be a good mother. But the comments arents that far off either.
The negative comments are ridiculous. My cousin in his 20's just lost his mother, she was only 45 her death was hard on everyone not due to her age but because love she provided. Her son is set, she left him a 3 bedroom 2 bath fairly large home, 3 vehicles, and enough money to pay bills monthly and still live a moderate yet budgeted life if he chose not to work. However his mother's work efforts rubbed off so he works in the gov. just like she did and will be fine. Literally none in my family said a word to me when I had my first baby at age 16. But when I had my 3rd at 31 some asked if I was done? Like really! I'm financially stable and retired at 41, and perfectly healthy. I am done but that's only because my youngest son has autism and needs my care 24/7. My husband and I don't feel it would be fair to bring another child in and not give it the full attention our others received. It's not about age, it's about the stability you provide, while alive and after!
This is the reason I really hate social media. Tiktok is the worst. Those ppl are hateful trolls with no life They can only wish to be this awesome woman and her pretty baby. Screw them and y'all live your best life together
The number one lesson she should learn here is don't use tiktok. People are friggin crazy.
Screw it. Been there have a wife that 16 years younger than me and I am mother of a 2, 4, and 7 year old at 38. My grandma had my mom at 36. Further my mother has 8 year old twins my nieces because their parents both died in a car accident she's in her 50s . Stop judging they are all happy and them wanting a baby makes them appreciate her more. Why don't you start by looking at your life people. These people have every right to love their child no matter their age. Btw I am a woman. Chew on that internet trolls
Why are people so mean? Lovely family. Go be blessed and enjoy your beautiful family!❤️
those who decided to have children, better make sure you are all set financially with insurance and heritance to the child. Age doesn't matter.
happy for her, sad for the kid... also, my friend and his wife want to adopt, but theyve been told their only option is to adopt a child with severe disabilities; because theres just too many children born with disabilities that are surrendered by their parents... theyve considered private adoption, but havent had any luck. 😔
My aunty married young. She passed away when she was 36 and my cousins were 15 and 7 and her husband passed away 2 years later making them orphans. We all have stories of young people who die and leave their children. No one is sure to live tomorrow. You can be involved in a car accident, a bomb, plane crash, mass shooting, serial killing/homicide/murder, heart attack or suicide at any age. Death is a respecter of no person. So, I find those negative posts heart wrenching. People don't always choose to die. If death is fought with love or strength then lots of people would be alive. I wonder if the blame the parents of all orphans for dying.
So instead of going the irresponsible route and doing some disgusting IVF scifi garbage she ponies up, does the right thing, gives that kid a home, and all anyone can say "she's too old". I got news for you people, an elderly mother is better than a foster mother any day. Anyone who chooses adoption over natural birth is a freaking hero.
If some hag fish celebrity like Madonna literally BUYS children people clap like trained seals but condemn this...thats tragic.
Why do you have to call her a hag fish? Why can't you just comment on what she says or does that offends you rather than spouting off some sexist BS insult.
Load More Replies... Losing your geriatric father st 13, while your geriatric mother suffers through all kinds of health issues your entire teenage years while your adult siblings just live their lives... it sucked! And dear old Mom left everything to the older ones when she died because she didn't want her menopause baby in the first place
I'm confused..it says she adopted the girl but then shows her in a photo with a hospital bracelet, in a hospital bed wearing a hospital gown holding a newborn. So she obviously gave birth to this kid! What?? Why did the article say the kid was adopted? I'm so confused
I'm 26, my sister is 23 and our parents are both almost 70, meaning they were already elders when we were in highschool. My mom said to me once, that when she was freshly over 40 and had us, she thought she'd manage just fine, but raising children is incredibly exhausting. Suddenly you're almost 60 and you have two teenagers, and many more health problems than you used to. From the children's perspective, being 13 and already seeing your parents aging and getting sick is heartbreaking.
Honestly I have to agree, to a point, that adopting such a young child at that age is incredibly irresponsible. Her body is in decline. By the time this girl is a teenager they won't be able to properly keep up with her. Theres a very real possibility they won't be alive to see her graduate highschool. If she'd adopted a decade earlier, I don't see the problem but at 51 you are much too old to adopt a toddler and be able to raise them without issue or die when they are far too young to lose a parent.
Tbh I agree about the selfishness, but that goes for any parent. Sure, afterwards they are required to be extremely selfless if they care at all, as a parent, but having a child in what ever way for yourself is selfish. Then again, who isn't selfish, but we are talking about a human being who will have no choice but to depend on you for their every need, and it's never a choice for the child, being born at all, nor who their parents end up being, etc.
113
181