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Mom Says She’s Not Going To Lie To Her Kids About Santa Or The Easter Bunny, Gets Criticized

Mom Says She’s Not Going To Lie To Her Kids About Santa Or The Easter Bunny, Gets Criticized

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When it comes to parenting, everyone has their own philosophy, style, and methods. And this case is the perfect example of that.

Recently, Nevada Shareef uploaded a TikTok where the mom revealed that she hasn’t told her children about Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, or the Tooth Fairy.

In the video, you can hear Nevada’s reasoning behind the decision too. She said she understands people might think it’s “weird” but the mom claims it’s healthy for her kids because she “doesn’t want to build her children’s lives on lies.” It’s clear that Nevada wants the best for her little ones.

Nevada Shareef caused quite a stir on TikTok when she revealed she hasn’t told her kids about Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, or the Tooth Fairy

Image credits: nevadashareef

Image credits: nevadashareef

Vicki Broadbent, a writer, director, broadcaster, and founder of the parenting blog Honest Mum, thinks whether you share with your kids that Santa, the Easter Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy are real or not, is your own personal choice as a parent and understands why this mother wanted to be upfront and honest with her children.

“She’s sharing one of her key values with them early on and this can avoid disappointment and can help them feel more responsible and mature,” Broadbent told Bored Panda.

It’s clear that she wants the best for her little ones

Image credits: nevadashareef

Image credits: nevadashareef

Broadbent herself has found that time in childhood when she believed in Santa and the gang to be quite magical and she personally wanted the same for my children. “I felt it contributed to the precious innocence of childhood,” she said.

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“When I finally told my then 10-year old that Santa wasn’t real, he felt sad that I hadn’t waited longer and given him another year as Christmas now didn’t feel as special,” the author of The Working Mom: Your Guide to Surviving and Thriving at Work and at Home recalled. “It was pretty remarkable that despite his maturity that he was still believing at that point and I felt as he was entering puberty, it was time to inform him of the truth. My 8-year-old still believes in all of the above but I’m not sure for how long. I think personally, I find it harmless for children to believe in these mythic and traditional characters but equally advocate honesty with my kids (in an age-appropriate way).”

“I fully see why the mother decided not to pretend to her children and as she said in her video, they still enjoyed the occasions regardless. I’d quite like not having to remember to leave money under my son’s pillow every time he loses a tooth, thank you very much!”

Image credits: nevadashareef

Image credits: nevadashareef

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Image credits: nevadashareef

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Image credits: nevadashareef

Just like Nevada, David Kyle Johnson, Ph.D., a professor of philosophy at King’s College in Pennsylvania, also argues that parents shouldn’t intentionally trick their children into believing that Santa actually exists.

“The reasons parents avoid the Santa-lie are often straightforward,” he wrote on Psychology Today. “Many simply think it’s wrong to lie to their children—and they have a good point. Although few philosophers (besides Kant) maintain that lying is always immoral, they do suggest that justifying consequences are necessary—a lie has to do a greater, justifying, good. But what justifying good does the Santa-lie produce?”

“A sense of wonder? Perhaps, but I could create wonder in my kids by tricking them into thinking that events of Star Wars actually occurred a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away… but would we call that a moral lie?”

Image credits: nevadashareef

Image credits: nevadashareef

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Image credits: nevadashareef

If you, however, are raising your kids with these mythical stories, you know that one they will figure them out. We all do. “Often it is other children who have older siblings in a school setting for eg who end up informing other children that Santa etc isn’t real. The child will then often come to the parent for confirmation either way and it is then that you should judge whether it is time or not to reveal the truth or whether it’s reasonable to keep up the pretence or magic (however you want to view it),” Vicki Broadbent said.

According to the Honest Mum, This will depend on how mature your child is and how they might take the news. “By the time your child has started high school at 11, it is unlikely they will still believe. Request they keep it from younger siblings too if you don’t want your other children to find out at that point. I’ve found most under 9s we know still believe but from 10 onwards they don’t.”

Over 400,000 people have already watched Nevada’s TikTok

@nevadashareefStitch this…..I’m interested in seeing different parents styles#stitch #fyp #viraltiktoks #momtiktok #parenting101🕺🏾🤣♬ original sound – Nevada Shareef

Vicki Broadbent of Honest Mum believes it is your parental choice whether or not you want to raise your kids with Santa and the gang

Image credits: honestmum

But beware. “Discussing this can also open up other questions about religion and science so I would work out how you want to handle any topics and questions that might spin-off from this as children will request what is and isn’t real (the answers will be based on your beliefs),” Broadbent advised. “Prepare yourself as these questions might surprise you. My parenting mantras are to ‘trust your gut’ and ‘always be prepared’ so consider those when it comes to this subject!”

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Vicki Broadbent also has a TikTok account and one of her videos went viral after she uploaded it to Facebook where it received over 3 million views. She has personally found it to be more positive and upbeat than other platforms (even though Broadbent realizes it’s not the case for all), and the comment section under Nevada’s video is a good example of that. It’s quite civil!

But their opinions on the topic are mixed

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terybriggs avatar
Mama Panda
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

They are her kids, it's her choice on how to raise her kids. My question is how did she handle things when other kids, and I am sure there were a lot, would question her kids' beliefs during those holidays? How did she work around the holiday seasons with images of Santa everywhere? Did her kids miss out on watching all of the Christmas movies and tv specials? Also, how does she feel about fantasy based children movies? I am genuinely curious and I am not bashing her. Just a conversation I am interested in learning more about.

bientje125 avatar
Sabienn
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I never believed in Santa, because I already believed in Sinterklaas (a Dutch and Belgian figure who gives kids presents on his birthday, December 6th) and my parents thought getting a lot of presents once a month was enough. Which is understandable. So I never got any presents for Christmas, but I did watch a lot of Christmas movies and I enjoyed them even though I didn't believe in Santa. So it's possible! But of course, every kid is different, so her kids could react differently

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samyobado avatar
Sam Yobado
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

So this is how it was explained to me, and now I explain it to others. Santa Clause isn’t a literal person, he’s the personification of the spirit of giving. When you are old enough to understand you too become Santa Clause. There are no lies in it, only a changing perspective as you mature.

raven_sheridan14 avatar
Raven Sheridan
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Due to the religion I was raised in, I wasn't lied to about Santa, the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy and all the rest of that childhood bunk. In first grade as Christmas approached, my teacher took me outside and asked me not to tell the other children that Santa wasn't real. I never felt deprived. I had, (and still have) an extremely active and vivid imagination. We had celebrations on random days, for no reason at all. Those days were always so special, because every gift came from the heart. Not because of a societal convention.

doggofroggo avatar
Doggo Froggo
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think she can do whatever she wishes as they are her children. As long as she's not abusing them, (and I don't think this is abuse personally) it's none of anyone else's business - end of.

james_fox1984 avatar
Foxxy (The Original)
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

How about let families do their own thing. If you don’t believe in Christmas or Easter or you don’t celebrate it, then don’t. You don’t need an excuse. If you Don’t teach about Santa, tooth fairy etc same thing, it’s your family so your choice. Just do you. It’s no one else’s business as long as you aren’t harming your children.

justprayagain avatar
Black Karen
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Nothing you say about abortionmakes any sense. If yu understand anatomy physiology and basic biology, which you clearly dont, youd know that babies in the womb are... omg actual living creatures. They are humans. Babies. They are alive and their hearts beat and they swallow and smile but I wouldnt expect someone with such a small brain fill with ignorance to be able to comprehend a concept so simple.

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amunetbarrywood avatar
Kristal
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Hmm well, it was a little backwards for me as a child. My mother was a single parent and I remember her reaching under my pillow when I lost a tooth (about 5-ish). That's when I figured they weren't real but my mom was having so much fun playing these imaginary roles that I just let her think I didn't know. I never interpreted it as lying but something that made her happy to do, why take that away? Then, on the flip side, my sister (10 years younger then I), figured out santa wasn't real due to not having special wrapping paper on the present from santa (wasn't much money this year so no budget for special wrapping paper) and she bawled and made a huge scene "YOU LIED TO ME!??!?". It was quite dramatic. So really, it just depends on the kid how they would take it and no one can predict that, so do what you think is best for your kid(s).

piper-fair avatar
Lilly Rose Poppy
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My mom did this to me. She just said, I don’t want you to grow up being lied to, so Santa is not real. It’s not bad, it’s completely healthy

jeffrequier_1 avatar
Requiem
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

you let them figure it out on their own. Kids dont get devestated when they realize from using critical thinking that they dont exist. They still expect presents from all these mythical beings

el_dee_1 avatar
El Dee
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Doesn't seem that radical to me. The only one of these I was brought up with in my country was Santa Claus, the others didn't exist. I remember my (much older) cousins visiting from America and being quite shocked that I knew Easter Eggs came from my parents and not the Easter Bunny (who I'd never even heard of!) Made up magical beings is a weird thing to get your kids to believe in but then, so many kids are raised to believe in God still..

christine-backbay avatar
Uncommon Boston
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When my son first asked if the tooth fairy was real, I told him it his choice to believe or not. He was five and stunned. Thought about it and asked about Santa and the Easter Bunny. Then I told him parents decide what their family will believe in. It is their decision, not his. He shouldn't tell other children. My parents choose to continue following the European traditions they grew up with. When at their homes for Christmas we did things the old way. No Santa or Bunny. As children we enjoyed all holiday celebrations and the holiday specials, but knew reindeer don't talk. We did most things differently. I told my son I would never lie to him -- ever. He needed to believe without question the earth is round and other things he can't see.. He has a fantastic imagination and wrote wonderful fantasy stories all his creation. For my son, it was the right decision. We never discussed talking cartoon animal and toys.

shannonparrott avatar
Shannon Parrott
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My daughter never believed in Santa or Easter bunny. So when she asked I told her the truth but reminded her that other kids did so don't tell them. It might be hurtful to them if you do. She understood what I meant. But when I was a kid I knew a family that told their kids there was a Santa but they were so poor there was no Christmas gifts and I remember how hurt they were thinking Santa didn't bring them gifts. They wondered what they did wrong especially when the class bully was showing off what he had gotten for Christmas. So I think it's ok to tell them or not. To each their own but maybe sometimes we need to think about things like this.

tjkckh2 avatar
BIG FOOT
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

A parent can teach their kids what they want. But why to you have to go post it all over social media like it's some big deal?

jessgunn77 avatar
JessG
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is a bigger conversation, the issue isn't black and white. There is a possibility for negative repercussions on both sides of the issue, as well as positive. The main thing here, is that she can tell or not tell her kids whatever she wants, as long as she considers the impact her decisions make. That's it. Everyone lies to their kids, it's just up to the parent to decide which lies to tell while considering the impact

alangreen avatar
Alan Green
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Totally agree with her. I've never had kids but I always said if I did I couldn't lie to them about all these fake entities. I remember as a kid feeling let down and lied to when I worked out these things myself. Then to follow it up my parents divorced leaving me thinking their marriage vows were yet another lie too. Basically everything good in my childhood turned out to be BS. Guess that's why I don't rely on anybody but myself. All that BS gave me trust issues.

kaliniemann avatar
Anxiety
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I guess it makes sense, I mean as a kid I vaguely remember how I felt on Easter and Christmas, but I found out at a young age the tooth fairy wasn’t real, but I never felt robbed of that. Honestly its up to the parent, on one hand kids enjoy the magic, on the other they may feel lied or deceived by their parents.

jpcallaghan avatar
JP callaghan
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Funny because I have several book on the subject and it easy to find on any historical website....

vidimlic62 avatar
Mimi777
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

There are millions of little kids around the world who have a different religion and culture and they didn't believe in Santa or any of the other ones. Their childhood wasn't ruined.

lesburleson avatar
Leslie Burleson
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's not lying , it's creating childhood magic . Kids only get to be kids for a little while before the real world takes magic away. Let them believe

ddw2945 avatar
Curry on...
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I didn't teach my kids about Santa, but we still celebrated Christmas with food and fun. I also got them gifts throughout the year. I had a well-educated acquaintance tell me I was cruel for not teaching them about Santa, to which I replied, 'Christmas is not about Santa, it's about the birth of Christ. And no lie, she said, "what the hell does Christmas have to do with Christ?#&@ Okie dokie.

am-vautour avatar
am_c0m0
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I raised my children the same way. At least I never had to find an explanation about why the kids who bullied others or who were mean had great toys at Christmas from 'Santa'.

gabbym avatar
Gabby M
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My mom is a Jesus freak and always told me and my siblings that Santa wasn't real. I feel like I missed out as a kid, so now I choose to believe in Santa. I see him as an embodiment of Christmas joy and cheer.

vincenzocaggiula avatar
Vincenzo Caggiula
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

How about you do whatever you educate your kids to the best. Of your abilities and not go on Internet looking for approval (realp

vincenzocaggiula avatar
Vincenzo Caggiula
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

So actually what I meant was:how about you educate your kids to the best of your abilities and not ask Internet in search of false notoriety?

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katherineboag avatar
Katherine Boag
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I was pretty devastated at the way i learned santa wasnt real, but i realise now it wasnt that i was lied to about santa, but the cruel way my dad told me he wasnt real.

seanegan avatar
Sean Egan
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It good to let them believe in those so it's easier later on when they discover god and heaven don't exist either

springfisk avatar
Spring Fisk
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Our family was very honest telling us the truth about Santa, but they were sure to point out that it is so much fun it was to pretend and that we should not tell other kids because they did not know and it would upset them. We had an awesome childhood and had fun pretending. My brother told my niece a few years ago because she asked point blank several times if he was real or not. My brother did not want to lie so we were honest. She was fine and still enjoys pretending.

aidansivits avatar
AntiAntiVaxx
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I feel like although its not true the magic of these idols lasts forever I am 16 and know Santa is not real its the nostalgia the magic and wonder of those expierences in the past that make Christmas so fun. I think that witholding that is not right.

heathervance avatar
AzKhaleesi
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I am very torn on this, on one hand, I understand what she's saying. On the other hand, I would've hated not being able to sleep on Christmas Eve trying to listen for Santa. Heck we still mess with our teens and tell them santa is real. they know he's not, we know he's not, but we love the magic. My kids to this day say "mom did you put out santa's key?" we have a large skeleton key (it's an ornament) that says santa on it, its for houses that don't have a chimney. We all know it's not real but it's been such a part of our family memories. My oldest is 19 and she said, "When I move out the first thing I want is a Santa Key, even though I'll be here because I don't want santa to bring my presents to me, I want them here with you guys." So no, teaching your kids about santa etc does not ruin them. And my kids have never accused me of lying to them when they found out either. So not sure how to feel about this.

ovataacronicta avatar
Ovata Acronicta
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yeah, I was never told Santa et al existed either. I did have a family member come through and get me coal when I explicitly asked for it - some other members thought it was cruel but at the time and even now I still think it's funny. Said family member got me other things too but...we're fairly alike in adulthood so...she got it, I got it, it was funny. I still have the bag and coal bits somewhere. My step-sibling was told Santa existed, and lost their friggin marbles at like 8 when told otherwise. Immediately asked about Jesus too, which...you know, not quite the intended results for family. Having seen that meltdown and the absolute loss of trust following it, it just seems like a tradition I wouldn't partake in. The backlash moms like this get every time they're on this side of the field is just goofy honestly. I assure you the holiday is no less "magical" without believing in Santa. Nowadays the magic is getting folks - or making them - the right things on a budget.

piet-puk avatar
Piet Puk
Community Member
3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I hope she is honest enough to tell her kids that Jezus is made up as well.

astridtvandam avatar
OpalTheRainwing
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

For me I remember when I asked my mom And I cried Lol I was heartbroken I cried and was saying “ why am I crying over this” over and over Oof

juslisenk avatar
Yo Momma
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I did the exact same thing. I made sure to tell my children that other children do believe and that is ok, and to NEVER tell them otherwise. They are 10 and 12 now and have never ruined it for another kids. My kids still have an imagination, they still play, they didn't miss out on anything.

nevits_yibble avatar
Nevits Yibble
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Millions of modern children all over the planet have been raised healthy and flourished for thousands of years without believing in Santa Claus or the Easter Bunny. I think her kids will survive

lorrierothstein avatar
Lorrie Rothstein
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She parents her kids the way she wants. I don't see anything wrong it

msmith_3 avatar
PjandBolt
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My parents did this with me, mostly for religious beliefs but also because they didn't want to lie to me about it. Of course it felt normal to not believe in Santa and all the others, but I had plenty imagination to spare! I honestly think it depends on the family, sometimes it's really simple and easy for the kid to eventually realize that Santa, the Easter bunny, and the tooth fairy aren't real, and sometimes it's really hard for them to understand. Not telling your kids about Santa, the Easter bunny, and the tooth fairy is perfectly fine in my opinion. It's just a choice of preference I guess.

spazmops19 avatar
Logic and Reason
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Parents deceive their kids for years and then expect their kids to be honest.

hiie_posti avatar
Hiie Posti
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I am sooo on her side. My mum never pushed that on me either, she kinda let me be. And I still had an imagination, oh how big. I thought up a whole country, and I'm sure I'm not the only way.

michaelswanson avatar
Lunar Bicycle
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I was also raised without Santa, the Easter Bunny, etc. I still loved the holidays and had a vivid, active imagination. I knew all my presents at Xmas came from my mom, but she still labeled them “from Santa” for fun. When I was older, but still a kid, I realized that the Santa myth could be really harmful. You’re supposed to get presents from him just for being a good kid, but poor kids got few presents, or none at all, while more affluent kids got more and fancier presents. That’s gotta play into the idea that if you’re poor, you’re bad.

hazelree avatar
Stille20
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Sometimes it's okay to do a thing without talking about it on social media... sometimes it is okay to disagree with something and not post it in the comments.

mintyminameow avatar
Mewton’s Third Paw
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

But even if you’re not raised in these cultural traditions, if you’re in America theres really no escaping it. My family never celebrated Christmas (not American / Christian) until I got in school and other kids were getting Christmas presents and coloring Santa. But we still signed gifts “from Santa” and did milk and cookies once we started celebrating. We didn’t talk about Santa like he wasn’t real. Like what I’m saying is you can technically know these things are fake but then still participate like it is real. Does anyone actually believe in the easter bunny ever? Even kids probably know it’s just for coloring and symbolizing springtime or whatever, when you see more bunnies around. People know it’s fake but you can still talk about it and play pretend. Like kids know a tea party isn’t real tea but you don’t ever need to actually say that. It’s for playing.

dontlook avatar
Don't Look
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

...okay. Question: do they know about the easter bunny or santa or the tooth fairy anyway?

katerynagedz avatar
Kateryna
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My parents simply told me that there was a St Valentine, a Santa Claus etc before, and today we celebrate the tradition, and sometimes we say the gifts are from Santa. It's a wonderful tradition of giving.

skwirril avatar
స్టీఫెన్ ఆండ్రూ
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't understand why society normalises (essentially expects) parents lying to their children. It's not 'magical'; it's a lie. If you can't be honest with your kids, how can you expect them to be honest with you?

ilbrujo avatar
Tapio Magnussen
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Maybe in those cases is not about lies but illusion. Maybe thinking a 4yo kid believing in Santa will become a professional liar is not a good point.

danit avatar
Froganit Gamesy
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This idea to collectively lie to children in order to distort their perception of the real world is insane! No wonder so many Americans believe in conspiracy theories.

jpcallaghan avatar
JP callaghan
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't think it's healthy either, why lie to your kids. Bad enough that Christmas is actually a the roman festival of saturnalia, and Easter is a festival to the fertility goddess Ishtar (rolling eggs down a hill symbolises eggs travelling down the fallopian tubes)

amunetbarrywood avatar
Kristal
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

JP, I think Mama Panda may be referencing Eostre who was the goddess of spring for early British pagans and the monk she referenced is the one that wrote about it

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Motes Menezes
Community Member
3 years ago (edited)

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terybriggs avatar
Mama Panda
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

They are her kids, it's her choice on how to raise her kids. My question is how did she handle things when other kids, and I am sure there were a lot, would question her kids' beliefs during those holidays? How did she work around the holiday seasons with images of Santa everywhere? Did her kids miss out on watching all of the Christmas movies and tv specials? Also, how does she feel about fantasy based children movies? I am genuinely curious and I am not bashing her. Just a conversation I am interested in learning more about.

bientje125 avatar
Sabienn
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I never believed in Santa, because I already believed in Sinterklaas (a Dutch and Belgian figure who gives kids presents on his birthday, December 6th) and my parents thought getting a lot of presents once a month was enough. Which is understandable. So I never got any presents for Christmas, but I did watch a lot of Christmas movies and I enjoyed them even though I didn't believe in Santa. So it's possible! But of course, every kid is different, so her kids could react differently

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samyobado avatar
Sam Yobado
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

So this is how it was explained to me, and now I explain it to others. Santa Clause isn’t a literal person, he’s the personification of the spirit of giving. When you are old enough to understand you too become Santa Clause. There are no lies in it, only a changing perspective as you mature.

raven_sheridan14 avatar
Raven Sheridan
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Due to the religion I was raised in, I wasn't lied to about Santa, the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy and all the rest of that childhood bunk. In first grade as Christmas approached, my teacher took me outside and asked me not to tell the other children that Santa wasn't real. I never felt deprived. I had, (and still have) an extremely active and vivid imagination. We had celebrations on random days, for no reason at all. Those days were always so special, because every gift came from the heart. Not because of a societal convention.

doggofroggo avatar
Doggo Froggo
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think she can do whatever she wishes as they are her children. As long as she's not abusing them, (and I don't think this is abuse personally) it's none of anyone else's business - end of.

james_fox1984 avatar
Foxxy (The Original)
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

How about let families do their own thing. If you don’t believe in Christmas or Easter or you don’t celebrate it, then don’t. You don’t need an excuse. If you Don’t teach about Santa, tooth fairy etc same thing, it’s your family so your choice. Just do you. It’s no one else’s business as long as you aren’t harming your children.

justprayagain avatar
Black Karen
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Nothing you say about abortionmakes any sense. If yu understand anatomy physiology and basic biology, which you clearly dont, youd know that babies in the womb are... omg actual living creatures. They are humans. Babies. They are alive and their hearts beat and they swallow and smile but I wouldnt expect someone with such a small brain fill with ignorance to be able to comprehend a concept so simple.

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amunetbarrywood avatar
Kristal
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Hmm well, it was a little backwards for me as a child. My mother was a single parent and I remember her reaching under my pillow when I lost a tooth (about 5-ish). That's when I figured they weren't real but my mom was having so much fun playing these imaginary roles that I just let her think I didn't know. I never interpreted it as lying but something that made her happy to do, why take that away? Then, on the flip side, my sister (10 years younger then I), figured out santa wasn't real due to not having special wrapping paper on the present from santa (wasn't much money this year so no budget for special wrapping paper) and she bawled and made a huge scene "YOU LIED TO ME!??!?". It was quite dramatic. So really, it just depends on the kid how they would take it and no one can predict that, so do what you think is best for your kid(s).

piper-fair avatar
Lilly Rose Poppy
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My mom did this to me. She just said, I don’t want you to grow up being lied to, so Santa is not real. It’s not bad, it’s completely healthy

jeffrequier_1 avatar
Requiem
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

you let them figure it out on their own. Kids dont get devestated when they realize from using critical thinking that they dont exist. They still expect presents from all these mythical beings

el_dee_1 avatar
El Dee
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Doesn't seem that radical to me. The only one of these I was brought up with in my country was Santa Claus, the others didn't exist. I remember my (much older) cousins visiting from America and being quite shocked that I knew Easter Eggs came from my parents and not the Easter Bunny (who I'd never even heard of!) Made up magical beings is a weird thing to get your kids to believe in but then, so many kids are raised to believe in God still..

christine-backbay avatar
Uncommon Boston
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When my son first asked if the tooth fairy was real, I told him it his choice to believe or not. He was five and stunned. Thought about it and asked about Santa and the Easter Bunny. Then I told him parents decide what their family will believe in. It is their decision, not his. He shouldn't tell other children. My parents choose to continue following the European traditions they grew up with. When at their homes for Christmas we did things the old way. No Santa or Bunny. As children we enjoyed all holiday celebrations and the holiday specials, but knew reindeer don't talk. We did most things differently. I told my son I would never lie to him -- ever. He needed to believe without question the earth is round and other things he can't see.. He has a fantastic imagination and wrote wonderful fantasy stories all his creation. For my son, it was the right decision. We never discussed talking cartoon animal and toys.

shannonparrott avatar
Shannon Parrott
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My daughter never believed in Santa or Easter bunny. So when she asked I told her the truth but reminded her that other kids did so don't tell them. It might be hurtful to them if you do. She understood what I meant. But when I was a kid I knew a family that told their kids there was a Santa but they were so poor there was no Christmas gifts and I remember how hurt they were thinking Santa didn't bring them gifts. They wondered what they did wrong especially when the class bully was showing off what he had gotten for Christmas. So I think it's ok to tell them or not. To each their own but maybe sometimes we need to think about things like this.

tjkckh2 avatar
BIG FOOT
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

A parent can teach their kids what they want. But why to you have to go post it all over social media like it's some big deal?

jessgunn77 avatar
JessG
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is a bigger conversation, the issue isn't black and white. There is a possibility for negative repercussions on both sides of the issue, as well as positive. The main thing here, is that she can tell or not tell her kids whatever she wants, as long as she considers the impact her decisions make. That's it. Everyone lies to their kids, it's just up to the parent to decide which lies to tell while considering the impact

alangreen avatar
Alan Green
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Totally agree with her. I've never had kids but I always said if I did I couldn't lie to them about all these fake entities. I remember as a kid feeling let down and lied to when I worked out these things myself. Then to follow it up my parents divorced leaving me thinking their marriage vows were yet another lie too. Basically everything good in my childhood turned out to be BS. Guess that's why I don't rely on anybody but myself. All that BS gave me trust issues.

kaliniemann avatar
Anxiety
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I guess it makes sense, I mean as a kid I vaguely remember how I felt on Easter and Christmas, but I found out at a young age the tooth fairy wasn’t real, but I never felt robbed of that. Honestly its up to the parent, on one hand kids enjoy the magic, on the other they may feel lied or deceived by their parents.

jpcallaghan avatar
JP callaghan
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Funny because I have several book on the subject and it easy to find on any historical website....

vidimlic62 avatar
Mimi777
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

There are millions of little kids around the world who have a different religion and culture and they didn't believe in Santa or any of the other ones. Their childhood wasn't ruined.

lesburleson avatar
Leslie Burleson
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's not lying , it's creating childhood magic . Kids only get to be kids for a little while before the real world takes magic away. Let them believe

ddw2945 avatar
Curry on...
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I didn't teach my kids about Santa, but we still celebrated Christmas with food and fun. I also got them gifts throughout the year. I had a well-educated acquaintance tell me I was cruel for not teaching them about Santa, to which I replied, 'Christmas is not about Santa, it's about the birth of Christ. And no lie, she said, "what the hell does Christmas have to do with Christ?#&@ Okie dokie.

am-vautour avatar
am_c0m0
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I raised my children the same way. At least I never had to find an explanation about why the kids who bullied others or who were mean had great toys at Christmas from 'Santa'.

gabbym avatar
Gabby M
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My mom is a Jesus freak and always told me and my siblings that Santa wasn't real. I feel like I missed out as a kid, so now I choose to believe in Santa. I see him as an embodiment of Christmas joy and cheer.

vincenzocaggiula avatar
Vincenzo Caggiula
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

How about you do whatever you educate your kids to the best. Of your abilities and not go on Internet looking for approval (realp

vincenzocaggiula avatar
Vincenzo Caggiula
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

So actually what I meant was:how about you educate your kids to the best of your abilities and not ask Internet in search of false notoriety?

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Katherine Boag
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I was pretty devastated at the way i learned santa wasnt real, but i realise now it wasnt that i was lied to about santa, but the cruel way my dad told me he wasnt real.

seanegan avatar
Sean Egan
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It good to let them believe in those so it's easier later on when they discover god and heaven don't exist either

springfisk avatar
Spring Fisk
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Our family was very honest telling us the truth about Santa, but they were sure to point out that it is so much fun it was to pretend and that we should not tell other kids because they did not know and it would upset them. We had an awesome childhood and had fun pretending. My brother told my niece a few years ago because she asked point blank several times if he was real or not. My brother did not want to lie so we were honest. She was fine and still enjoys pretending.

aidansivits avatar
AntiAntiVaxx
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I feel like although its not true the magic of these idols lasts forever I am 16 and know Santa is not real its the nostalgia the magic and wonder of those expierences in the past that make Christmas so fun. I think that witholding that is not right.

heathervance avatar
AzKhaleesi
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I am very torn on this, on one hand, I understand what she's saying. On the other hand, I would've hated not being able to sleep on Christmas Eve trying to listen for Santa. Heck we still mess with our teens and tell them santa is real. they know he's not, we know he's not, but we love the magic. My kids to this day say "mom did you put out santa's key?" we have a large skeleton key (it's an ornament) that says santa on it, its for houses that don't have a chimney. We all know it's not real but it's been such a part of our family memories. My oldest is 19 and she said, "When I move out the first thing I want is a Santa Key, even though I'll be here because I don't want santa to bring my presents to me, I want them here with you guys." So no, teaching your kids about santa etc does not ruin them. And my kids have never accused me of lying to them when they found out either. So not sure how to feel about this.

ovataacronicta avatar
Ovata Acronicta
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yeah, I was never told Santa et al existed either. I did have a family member come through and get me coal when I explicitly asked for it - some other members thought it was cruel but at the time and even now I still think it's funny. Said family member got me other things too but...we're fairly alike in adulthood so...she got it, I got it, it was funny. I still have the bag and coal bits somewhere. My step-sibling was told Santa existed, and lost their friggin marbles at like 8 when told otherwise. Immediately asked about Jesus too, which...you know, not quite the intended results for family. Having seen that meltdown and the absolute loss of trust following it, it just seems like a tradition I wouldn't partake in. The backlash moms like this get every time they're on this side of the field is just goofy honestly. I assure you the holiday is no less "magical" without believing in Santa. Nowadays the magic is getting folks - or making them - the right things on a budget.

piet-puk avatar
Piet Puk
Community Member
3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I hope she is honest enough to tell her kids that Jezus is made up as well.

astridtvandam avatar
OpalTheRainwing
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

For me I remember when I asked my mom And I cried Lol I was heartbroken I cried and was saying “ why am I crying over this” over and over Oof

juslisenk avatar
Yo Momma
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I did the exact same thing. I made sure to tell my children that other children do believe and that is ok, and to NEVER tell them otherwise. They are 10 and 12 now and have never ruined it for another kids. My kids still have an imagination, they still play, they didn't miss out on anything.

nevits_yibble avatar
Nevits Yibble
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Millions of modern children all over the planet have been raised healthy and flourished for thousands of years without believing in Santa Claus or the Easter Bunny. I think her kids will survive

lorrierothstein avatar
Lorrie Rothstein
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She parents her kids the way she wants. I don't see anything wrong it

msmith_3 avatar
PjandBolt
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My parents did this with me, mostly for religious beliefs but also because they didn't want to lie to me about it. Of course it felt normal to not believe in Santa and all the others, but I had plenty imagination to spare! I honestly think it depends on the family, sometimes it's really simple and easy for the kid to eventually realize that Santa, the Easter bunny, and the tooth fairy aren't real, and sometimes it's really hard for them to understand. Not telling your kids about Santa, the Easter bunny, and the tooth fairy is perfectly fine in my opinion. It's just a choice of preference I guess.

spazmops19 avatar
Logic and Reason
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Parents deceive their kids for years and then expect their kids to be honest.

hiie_posti avatar
Hiie Posti
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I am sooo on her side. My mum never pushed that on me either, she kinda let me be. And I still had an imagination, oh how big. I thought up a whole country, and I'm sure I'm not the only way.

michaelswanson avatar
Lunar Bicycle
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I was also raised without Santa, the Easter Bunny, etc. I still loved the holidays and had a vivid, active imagination. I knew all my presents at Xmas came from my mom, but she still labeled them “from Santa” for fun. When I was older, but still a kid, I realized that the Santa myth could be really harmful. You’re supposed to get presents from him just for being a good kid, but poor kids got few presents, or none at all, while more affluent kids got more and fancier presents. That’s gotta play into the idea that if you’re poor, you’re bad.

hazelree avatar
Stille20
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Sometimes it's okay to do a thing without talking about it on social media... sometimes it is okay to disagree with something and not post it in the comments.

mintyminameow avatar
Mewton’s Third Paw
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

But even if you’re not raised in these cultural traditions, if you’re in America theres really no escaping it. My family never celebrated Christmas (not American / Christian) until I got in school and other kids were getting Christmas presents and coloring Santa. But we still signed gifts “from Santa” and did milk and cookies once we started celebrating. We didn’t talk about Santa like he wasn’t real. Like what I’m saying is you can technically know these things are fake but then still participate like it is real. Does anyone actually believe in the easter bunny ever? Even kids probably know it’s just for coloring and symbolizing springtime or whatever, when you see more bunnies around. People know it’s fake but you can still talk about it and play pretend. Like kids know a tea party isn’t real tea but you don’t ever need to actually say that. It’s for playing.

dontlook avatar
Don't Look
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

...okay. Question: do they know about the easter bunny or santa or the tooth fairy anyway?

katerynagedz avatar
Kateryna
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My parents simply told me that there was a St Valentine, a Santa Claus etc before, and today we celebrate the tradition, and sometimes we say the gifts are from Santa. It's a wonderful tradition of giving.

skwirril avatar
స్టీఫెన్ ఆండ్రూ
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't understand why society normalises (essentially expects) parents lying to their children. It's not 'magical'; it's a lie. If you can't be honest with your kids, how can you expect them to be honest with you?

ilbrujo avatar
Tapio Magnussen
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Maybe in those cases is not about lies but illusion. Maybe thinking a 4yo kid believing in Santa will become a professional liar is not a good point.

danit avatar
Froganit Gamesy
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This idea to collectively lie to children in order to distort their perception of the real world is insane! No wonder so many Americans believe in conspiracy theories.

jpcallaghan avatar
JP callaghan
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't think it's healthy either, why lie to your kids. Bad enough that Christmas is actually a the roman festival of saturnalia, and Easter is a festival to the fertility goddess Ishtar (rolling eggs down a hill symbolises eggs travelling down the fallopian tubes)

amunetbarrywood avatar
Kristal
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

JP, I think Mama Panda may be referencing Eostre who was the goddess of spring for early British pagans and the monk she referenced is the one that wrote about it

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Motes Menezes
Community Member
3 years ago (edited)

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