This Mom’s Desperate Plea To Husband For Help Is What Too Many Women Are Going Through Right Now
Celeste Yvonne, 38, is a mother of two, with a 4-year-old boy and a baby to constantly keep her eyes on. And even though Celeste would probably like to stay in the kid-raising game without a substitution, naturally, sometimes it drains her energy so much, she needs help. Sometimes, however, the mom feels like her husband isn’t willing to step up. After nearly losing it the last time, Celeste has decided to write him an open letter.
“My husband and I talk about this topic fairly regularly,” Yvonne, who also runs a parenting blog called And What A Mom, told Bored Panda. “The reason I wrote an open letter is because I know lots of women facing similar issues. I discuss this topic all the time with my friends. I wanted to put it out there to start a larger discussion. I wanted women to feel encouraged to ask for help. I wanted husbands to know we need more help.” And it worked; moms all over the internet started relating to the emotional text.
Since her story went viral, people have been wondering about Celeste’s husband’s take on the situation. “He understands the bigger picture,” she added. “He doesn’t love the attention directed towards him, but he knows my concerns and we work on that daily.” Scroll down to check out the letter that started it all and let us know your thoughts about it in the comments.
Follow Celeste Yvonne on Facebook.
Celeste Yvonne, a mom of two, has been struggling to keep up with her new baby
With two little devils, you can get your hands full pretty fast
And as she felt alone in the struggle, Celeste has decided to speak out on Facebook
“My husband expresses gratitude so much more now”
“We communicate better about our needs and try to keep frustrations from building up inside us”
“Talk to your Partner. Tell them you need more help. Chances are, they’re eager to up their game”
Instantly, mothers all over the internet started relating to Celeste
Some, however, tend to disagree
Nothing says "I love you" like airing your dirty laundry on Facebook.
While I understand the sentiment, wouldn't it have been better if she had just given this to him as a personal letter/message? I get that writing it down may help and have more impact than speaking sometimes, but posting of facebook seems a bit too much. I completely understand how important this message is for her, I just think she could have given it to her husband directly instead of making it public...
I recently asked my husband to friend me from his facebook account. He looked at me, befuddled. "Why would I do that? If I want to tell you something, I walk to the room you are in and tell you?" Our adult working life was as a team of tag-team parenting/shift work. We both did all that was required during our shift at home. Worked really well, very effective method of birth control. ;)
Load More Replies...
The issue is the word "help". Dads should not "help". The parental etc. duties are on both sides equaly, none of the parents should only provide "help" to the other. Sure, men can't breasfeed. But that's it! They capable of covering all of the rest, so why don't they? I hate to see families, when both parents work full time, but the whole house and children are handled by the mom and the dad only awaits the dinner and then sits with beer watching TV, because they are tired... WTF?! Even if the mom does not work - I can't believe, that so many people, even other women, think othat housewifes do nothing all day long. Ugh...
Exactly. It's even worse when it gets referred to as babysitting.Oh the dad is babysitting the kids today everyone congratulate him. No it's called parenting and if you're not capable of doing it you shouldn't be having kids.
Load More Replies...
Passive aggressive, insulting, and publicly shaming. This sounds like an excellent relationship.
Oh yay the age of social media where we not only get to read everybody’s personal issues, people get praised for airing their dirty laundry. Yes the sentiment is valid but why does everything have to be public and for show? Well, hopefully it helped! I’d be pissed if my spouse publicly blasted me though.
Hm. Somehow I think maybe this text will open some eyes, I don‘t like the part that she choose to do it as a „open letter“ for her husband. I feel like blaming someone in public (even in this kind and reflective way) shouldn‘t be a thing in a relationship. I think that parenting is a job for mother and father, but we don‘t know what his work is, or if she even try to talk with him. Maybe she didn‘t communicate that she is done and needs sleep. Maybe he is naive and thinks she is okay with it. Who knows. I don‘t like this „public part“ on this.
Well, I tried to talk to him, just like this and he got offensive and we divorced nearly two years ago. He was not a great husband or great father. He's a good, god fearing man and a great dad for the most part. He has since found someone he doesn't mind helping and I have found someone who doesn't mind helping me.
That's horrible! I'm so sorry you went through this but so glad that you found someone who really loves you in the end.
Load More Replies...
What about us, single working moms who do everything alone? No help from anyone. And please, talk to your spouses don't flash your domestic problems on the internet. Maybe it could help someone but it probably won't.
Slamming the dad on Facebook, it's a bold move. I think he may be slightly peeved.
The age of social media... For every problem you gotta write an "open letter" that has to go viral... Yes I did read that she tried talking to him before and that it did help 'improve' the relationship but still, I don't think this publicly shaming is needed. She could've just written the letter and give it to him in person.
Also the "I need to hear you're grateful for all I do, I want to know that you notice the laundry is done and a nice dinner has been prepared .... " Do you also tell your husband you're grateful that he's going to work and providing for the family too? Yes getting a compliment is nice but geez.... "good job hun, thx for doing laundry"?
Load More Replies...
shout out to the single moms who have no choice but to do it alone because their baby daddies ran out on them...
Shout out to the broken Dads whose wives had affairs, got a 'no fault' divorce, were granted the house, sole custody and a monthly income and left them homeless, penniless and alone - perhaps contributing to the fact that suicide among middle aged men has skyrocketed in the last few years accounting for 7 out of 10 suicides. But who cares? it's just men.
Load More Replies...
Dude, run! What kind of person puts this on social? Here's the tl;dr version. You're the greatest worthless husband ever.
I would love to know about his reaction to this letter, if it has helped ?
You can read later in the article that she feels it has improved her relationship, and that the father really stepped up around the house and with the kids.
Load More Replies...
This is really unfair to all the great dads and husbands out there. You've married a s**t man - you knew that when you married him. If he doesn't help and you're too proud to just tell him, you are the only idiot here. Don't paint all men the same, or blame the previous generation for the piece of s**t man you chose to have children with. As someone who had the childcare conversation with my husband before we married, we opened up communication about how we will deal. Now we have kids, we couldn't be stronger, more committed and supportive of each other so much so I'm writing this as I lie in bed between my husband and my baby in the side sleeper. Baby just woke up sad because he peed through all his clothes and was hungry. Hubby woke up too and saw I was struggling to console, change and settle baby enough to get his bottle ready too. He didn't even ask how he could help, he just took baby and changed him so I could get his milk. That's how it's done. Your situation is your fault.
aw that guy needs to step up his game, it's such a damn shame that she's had to resort to facebook to make him wake up to this, obviously face to face conversations have fallen on deaf ears. If he can't see the stress she's under, the aching in her eyes, the drained person next to him, what can he see? just helping a little would help a lot and helping a lot would help even more. You both made the kids, so you've gotta both raise them, the good AND the bad bits, chances are the baby didn't settle with the dad coz he doesn't spend enough time with it? And I speak from experience, I've got 2, we both handle them, we both work at it, it's not always easy but it's always worth it.
I wonder why it is that many women seem to think providing for a family is essentially like a day at a spa or something? White males accounted for 7 of 10 suicides in 2016. That's not a coincidence. Work is stressful, Commuting is stressful. And these days work doesn't stop when you leave the office. I take care of my kids and it's stressful too. But too many women like the lady above who think it's a "luxury" to be a man, seem to think work is some kind of bloody holiday. What jobs has she held down I wonder? I come home from work after spending 10 hours out of the house and face into several hours of preparing meals and cleaning / organizing / doing chores before hitting the sack long after my wife had gone to sleep. Up again before her and nose to the grindstone again - and yet many arguments revolved around how hard HER situation was while I apparently contributed 'nothing'. We had a frank exchange of views on that and we are both happier and more understanding because of it!
Thank you...took the words right out of my mouth. If a husband and wife both work outside the home, they should both share in household chores equally. If he doesn't then he's more than likely lazy and/or selfish. And spending time with your kids, helping them, teaching them, correcting them, and caring for them is not a chore. It is a choice you make when you decide to bring children into this world. If the wife stays at home, she needs to recognize that HE is also sacrificing...usually greatly. Work isn't singing and dancing. It is frequently stressful, we deal with intense worry, uncertainty, risk, conflict, politics, etc. We feel the pressure of providing for our families, and it never ends. So please recognize this is a two-way street. Both of us have to sacrifice to make this relationship work. I get so tired of the all the man-shaming and man-blaming when most of us our out there fighting the good fight and trying to carve out a living for ourselves and our families.
Load More Replies...
ORRRR......you could just not have kids, enjoy all your time, money, love, energy and dreams on each other. And live happily ever after. ♡ Yes, I know - kids are fantastic. But the more I read stuff like this the happier I am that I don't have kids. I'm gonna go take a nap now and plan my next trip. Lol!
OMG was going to make this comment thanks for doing it so I don't have to.
Load More Replies...
I'm not being cold hearted but I think some women's expectation of what they think is normal and a woman's job, is choice. With this much stress and anxiety comes cranky kids and exhausted parents. Quit being so hard on yourself. I raised twins by myself and worked full time. Some days were awful...but those days ended and a new day started. Give yourself credit and above all else be kind to yourself.
I've read a lot of comments here and it seems like many people are forgetting that she isn't generalizing all fathers and that this is simply a problem she had with HER husband. She isn't attacking fathers here, she's just sharing a problem she had experienced with her husband
Yes, but to write it as an open letter all over the Internet is detrimental all fathers because she is perpetuating a stereotype. The effect is reinforcing the incorrect assumption that all dads act like this so people reading it get yet another negative and unfair view of men. It doesn't matter that she's written it to one man; the mass audience of the Internet can see it too.
Load More Replies...
Facebook? Shouldn't such an issue can't be communicated face to face - without the general (and mostly unintersted) public. Some relationship...
Boo-Hoo. Passive aggressive marries jerk. Takes to Facebook to shame him for her poor decision in marrying him and not laying down the law about helping out. Let's all have a pity party.
You know, you can't possibly guess how someone will behave in a marriage before you marry them. You cannot know if he will be a good father until you have a baby with him. AND, people change. My guy was a pretty good single guy, with a great autonomy in his household. As soon as we moved in together, he began doing less. One day he did a load of laundry (yay !), and as I was putting it up to dry, I noticed that there wasn't a single one piece of MY clothing in the entire load. I was baffled. That was ten years ago. Just last week, I have begun doing only my laundry and leaving his clothing in the hamper. He still hasn't noticed. I'm curious to how this will turn out...
Load More Replies...
It seems to me that there is a communication problem, as she is grudging her husband for not knowing what she thinks he must do, instead of just plainly talk to him and tell him how she feels and what she needs. There are a lot of us men who believe in sharing the burden of house chores, raising the kids and providing an income, as neither of those tasks are exlusivly his or hers, but a thing that we certainly can't do as much as we would like to be able to, is to read minds
You don't have to read minds to SEE the dirty dishes in the sink and to DO THEM WITHOUT BEING ASKED !!!! You don't have to read minds to open your eyes and ask yourself what you can do to alleviate her workload. Why don't YOU ask HER what you can do for her instead of wanting HER to ask YOU for "help" ? She doesn't need you to "help" her, she needs you to do YOUR PART.
Load More Replies...
We are not all Asses. As for the lady who said she "would love to know what it is like to be a man and just leave for work without a million things to do." seriously? If your man isn't helping out in an equal partnership then you are with the wrong man! Also if this lady feels the need to post this on social media and not speak directly to her partner, then there is other problems than a lazy husband.
This has really worked and I am proud to testify of it. If you are passing through difficulties in your relationship, LORD MERCOLA can help solve marital problems, restore broken relationships and He can also cure diseases like HIV, AIDS, Herpes Virus, Cancer, E.T.C Email him for urgent help. Email: lordmercolatemple@gmail.com or WhatsApp/Call him at +1 (845) 731-5610 Thank you LORD MERCOLA for the help
First off, airing your dirty laundry on facebook makes you a small person. This was unnecessary. Second off. Why did you have so many kids if you couldn't handle them? They're not pets, so please stop breeding indiscriminately. Thirdly, if you can't handle the job of being the stay at home parent. Switch. You get the job while he does the stay at home parenting, because in this economy running the breadwinner down by throwing more c**p on their plate is just going to get you fired and fired with kids is worse than tired with kids. Basically, breeding is a responsibility. Stop abusing it.
I saw this story on a new site and it made me so mad. If I were her husband I would feel betrayed and embarrassed. And if my spouse was throwing me to the wolves and airing dirty laundry so publicly, I would consider this being a non-marriage. How passive aggressive of her. And if it was for money, she exploited her husband for it. Maybe he doesn't mind, idk. But I think it's horrible and would never do that. I feel bad for him. His wife just screeched her grievances in front of everyone.
Dear Moms- you gotta give have the responsibility for the baby to the dad- from the very beginning. Make it your project, all in together, or separate the different chores coming along with the child. I often hear Mom s complaining- but if you don't give them the chance to learn how to take care of an infant- you can't expect them to care, just that one night, when you feel like taking a rest- it's always two
By posting it publicly, she probably helped other women in the same situation to find the words to express their feelings.
I think she posted it as a statement in support of the IDEA that moms work their asses of and many dads are oblivious. I'm sure she did talk to him in private... many times, but someone's it's nice to have someone commit to words what you also are experiencing. As a blogger/ writer, this is her forum...pretty much the same as complain ing to your friends at happy hour, but more far reaching. I dig it!
I'm sorry but i am one of those fathers that Helps out. We have 4 kids and one of them with autism.... And i work my a*s out at the office and at home to give them a better life , i may not be perfect but i help my wife with everything, i play with them, give them Baths, take them to sleep, i get up at night 90 % of the times they need attention during nighttime, i clean the house......The only thing i don't do is cooking and that is because i suck at it and don't want my kids to eat nasty food that will only make them sick.
Her post wasn't a generalization of all fathers, she was just sharing a problem she had with her husband. She wasn't attacking all fathers
Load More Replies...
Must be nice!! I spoke up once to him and my own mother saying "I need help". I was met with them consorting together to try to take my son away from me. I asked if I could move in with my mother away from the father and she said "I don't think it's a good idea because D (my son) will be staying here." He was only there in the first place because I was forced to leave him with his father(even though I had already purchased a plane ticket for him) while I went to visit mine for the first time in years. Because I broke up with the father at the time. They claimed I abandoned my son and made a plan to keep him forever because I said I needed help. And instead of taking care of him he pawned my son off onto my mother because he had never done anything to take care of him since birth. I had to beg to get him to just give him 5mins of attention a week. And we planned this baby!!!!!
Women DO set a precedent! That is why I have warned both of my adult daughters to set the PROPER precedent from the start! I didnt, and I always had to take care of everything myself.
Someone on the replies to it is literally 'not all men'ing her. 'Way to paint all dads' he says. She literally does not generalise at all. She talks about her situation and the situations with her friends and some idiot still has to come along and try and undermine her complaints by being all not all dads are like this at her. Newsflash to the guys who do this - not everything is about you specifically. The world does not revolve around you. Other people actually exist in this world.
Shall we play a little numbers game? So lets say a mum stays at home, shes dooing the housework and carring for the kids. What does the statistics say about work hours? Well seeing from what you might read on the Internet it sounds like ..well 10 hours 12? 14 even? Nope, in Germany its between 2 to 3 Hours a day including cooking and all homework that has to be done. France, 2 to 3 hours. UK? 2 to 3 Hours. But okay shes in the US so it must be more there, right? Nope 2 to 3 hours. But childcare that takes a lot of time right? THats where the big part of the time is going right? Sorry no again, in Average and those numbers you can find all over the western States, about 1 to 1 and a half hours. SO At best were talking about a workload of 4 and a half hours a day. I can see why she needs help with that from her husband who in average is working about 7 and a half hours a day. And sure call for help on facebook, classy....
She posted this online to let other SAHM's know they're not alone. Just because you're the mom and stay at home with the kids doesn't mean you have to do everything and aren't allowed to ask for help.
Yeah seems weird to post it on facebook...However why do men not think they have to take more responsibility in general? It´s not like dishes, laundry, vaccuming etc is more pleasurable for women, we only do it cause the mens lazy arses aren´t and someone needs to or else the place will be a total wreck.
If there're two adults in charge of children, why one has to ask for help? Becase one has a D and the other doesn't. I call this patriarchy.
Why have kids with useless men. It's like they don't care at all that it's their child too. My father was like this, demanded everything from my mother, expected everything to be done, didn't even bother glancing our way now i can't even be bothered to hate him, i just don't care if he drops dead any second and i defo won't be there by his deathbed the same way he was never there in any shape or form for us.
Dear humans, Stop. Having. Children. I don't know if humans realize this, but 80% of the world's problems will be solved and/or slowed if we stop having kids for a generation. It's a sacrifice that people should make for future people. But, I understand. People are greedy and they want things. Now.
Your solution is everyone should stop having kids for a generation? I mean that's never going to happen but if it did there wouldn't be any future people to worry about. And anyway over population is not the problem. The problem is a small percentage of people in the most developed countries use the vast majority of resources.
Load More Replies...
Sexual orientation doesn't matter. Everyone can have a good or bad relationship with their partner regardless.
Load More Replies... 
Seems to me that this is another topic, to be discussed another time, in a different place. Come back then.
Load More Replies...
Nothing says "I love you" like airing your dirty laundry on Facebook.
While I understand the sentiment, wouldn't it have been better if she had just given this to him as a personal letter/message? I get that writing it down may help and have more impact than speaking sometimes, but posting of facebook seems a bit too much. I completely understand how important this message is for her, I just think she could have given it to her husband directly instead of making it public...
I recently asked my husband to friend me from his facebook account. He looked at me, befuddled. "Why would I do that? If I want to tell you something, I walk to the room you are in and tell you?" Our adult working life was as a team of tag-team parenting/shift work. We both did all that was required during our shift at home. Worked really well, very effective method of birth control. ;)
Load More Replies... The issue is the word "help". Dads should not "help". The parental etc. duties are on both sides equaly, none of the parents should only provide "help" to the other. Sure, men can't breasfeed. But that's it! They capable of covering all of the rest, so why don't they? I hate to see families, when both parents work full time, but the whole house and children are handled by the mom and the dad only awaits the dinner and then sits with beer watching TV, because they are tired... WTF?! Even if the mom does not work - I can't believe, that so many people, even other women, think othat housewifes do nothing all day long. Ugh...
Exactly. It's even worse when it gets referred to as babysitting.Oh the dad is babysitting the kids today everyone congratulate him. No it's called parenting and if you're not capable of doing it you shouldn't be having kids.
Load More Replies... Passive aggressive, insulting, and publicly shaming. This sounds like an excellent relationship.
Oh yay the age of social media where we not only get to read everybody’s personal issues, people get praised for airing their dirty laundry. Yes the sentiment is valid but why does everything have to be public and for show? Well, hopefully it helped! I’d be pissed if my spouse publicly blasted me though.
Hm. Somehow I think maybe this text will open some eyes, I don‘t like the part that she choose to do it as a „open letter“ for her husband. I feel like blaming someone in public (even in this kind and reflective way) shouldn‘t be a thing in a relationship. I think that parenting is a job for mother and father, but we don‘t know what his work is, or if she even try to talk with him. Maybe she didn‘t communicate that she is done and needs sleep. Maybe he is naive and thinks she is okay with it. Who knows. I don‘t like this „public part“ on this.
Well, I tried to talk to him, just like this and he got offensive and we divorced nearly two years ago. He was not a great husband or great father. He's a good, god fearing man and a great dad for the most part. He has since found someone he doesn't mind helping and I have found someone who doesn't mind helping me.
That's horrible! I'm so sorry you went through this but so glad that you found someone who really loves you in the end.
Load More Replies... What about us, single working moms who do everything alone? No help from anyone. And please, talk to your spouses don't flash your domestic problems on the internet. Maybe it could help someone but it probably won't.
Slamming the dad on Facebook, it's a bold move. I think he may be slightly peeved.
The age of social media... For every problem you gotta write an "open letter" that has to go viral... Yes I did read that she tried talking to him before and that it did help 'improve' the relationship but still, I don't think this publicly shaming is needed. She could've just written the letter and give it to him in person.
Also the "I need to hear you're grateful for all I do, I want to know that you notice the laundry is done and a nice dinner has been prepared .... " Do you also tell your husband you're grateful that he's going to work and providing for the family too? Yes getting a compliment is nice but geez.... "good job hun, thx for doing laundry"?
Load More Replies... shout out to the single moms who have no choice but to do it alone because their baby daddies ran out on them...
Shout out to the broken Dads whose wives had affairs, got a 'no fault' divorce, were granted the house, sole custody and a monthly income and left them homeless, penniless and alone - perhaps contributing to the fact that suicide among middle aged men has skyrocketed in the last few years accounting for 7 out of 10 suicides. But who cares? it's just men.
Load More Replies... Dude, run! What kind of person puts this on social? Here's the tl;dr version. You're the greatest worthless husband ever.
I would love to know about his reaction to this letter, if it has helped ?
You can read later in the article that she feels it has improved her relationship, and that the father really stepped up around the house and with the kids.
Load More Replies... This is really unfair to all the great dads and husbands out there. You've married a s**t man - you knew that when you married him. If he doesn't help and you're too proud to just tell him, you are the only idiot here. Don't paint all men the same, or blame the previous generation for the piece of s**t man you chose to have children with. As someone who had the childcare conversation with my husband before we married, we opened up communication about how we will deal. Now we have kids, we couldn't be stronger, more committed and supportive of each other so much so I'm writing this as I lie in bed between my husband and my baby in the side sleeper. Baby just woke up sad because he peed through all his clothes and was hungry. Hubby woke up too and saw I was struggling to console, change and settle baby enough to get his bottle ready too. He didn't even ask how he could help, he just took baby and changed him so I could get his milk. That's how it's done. Your situation is your fault.
aw that guy needs to step up his game, it's such a damn shame that she's had to resort to facebook to make him wake up to this, obviously face to face conversations have fallen on deaf ears. If he can't see the stress she's under, the aching in her eyes, the drained person next to him, what can he see? just helping a little would help a lot and helping a lot would help even more. You both made the kids, so you've gotta both raise them, the good AND the bad bits, chances are the baby didn't settle with the dad coz he doesn't spend enough time with it? And I speak from experience, I've got 2, we both handle them, we both work at it, it's not always easy but it's always worth it.
I wonder why it is that many women seem to think providing for a family is essentially like a day at a spa or something? White males accounted for 7 of 10 suicides in 2016. That's not a coincidence. Work is stressful, Commuting is stressful. And these days work doesn't stop when you leave the office. I take care of my kids and it's stressful too. But too many women like the lady above who think it's a "luxury" to be a man, seem to think work is some kind of bloody holiday. What jobs has she held down I wonder? I come home from work after spending 10 hours out of the house and face into several hours of preparing meals and cleaning / organizing / doing chores before hitting the sack long after my wife had gone to sleep. Up again before her and nose to the grindstone again - and yet many arguments revolved around how hard HER situation was while I apparently contributed 'nothing'. We had a frank exchange of views on that and we are both happier and more understanding because of it!
Thank you...took the words right out of my mouth. If a husband and wife both work outside the home, they should both share in household chores equally. If he doesn't then he's more than likely lazy and/or selfish. And spending time with your kids, helping them, teaching them, correcting them, and caring for them is not a chore. It is a choice you make when you decide to bring children into this world. If the wife stays at home, she needs to recognize that HE is also sacrificing...usually greatly. Work isn't singing and dancing. It is frequently stressful, we deal with intense worry, uncertainty, risk, conflict, politics, etc. We feel the pressure of providing for our families, and it never ends. So please recognize this is a two-way street. Both of us have to sacrifice to make this relationship work. I get so tired of the all the man-shaming and man-blaming when most of us our out there fighting the good fight and trying to carve out a living for ourselves and our families.
Load More Replies... ORRRR......you could just not have kids, enjoy all your time, money, love, energy and dreams on each other. And live happily ever after. ♡ Yes, I know - kids are fantastic. But the more I read stuff like this the happier I am that I don't have kids. I'm gonna go take a nap now and plan my next trip. Lol!
OMG was going to make this comment thanks for doing it so I don't have to.
Load More Replies... I'm not being cold hearted but I think some women's expectation of what they think is normal and a woman's job, is choice. With this much stress and anxiety comes cranky kids and exhausted parents. Quit being so hard on yourself. I raised twins by myself and worked full time. Some days were awful...but those days ended and a new day started. Give yourself credit and above all else be kind to yourself.
I've read a lot of comments here and it seems like many people are forgetting that she isn't generalizing all fathers and that this is simply a problem she had with HER husband. She isn't attacking fathers here, she's just sharing a problem she had experienced with her husband
Yes, but to write it as an open letter all over the Internet is detrimental all fathers because she is perpetuating a stereotype. The effect is reinforcing the incorrect assumption that all dads act like this so people reading it get yet another negative and unfair view of men. It doesn't matter that she's written it to one man; the mass audience of the Internet can see it too.
Load More Replies... Facebook? Shouldn't such an issue can't be communicated face to face - without the general (and mostly unintersted) public. Some relationship...
Boo-Hoo. Passive aggressive marries jerk. Takes to Facebook to shame him for her poor decision in marrying him and not laying down the law about helping out. Let's all have a pity party.
You know, you can't possibly guess how someone will behave in a marriage before you marry them. You cannot know if he will be a good father until you have a baby with him. AND, people change. My guy was a pretty good single guy, with a great autonomy in his household. As soon as we moved in together, he began doing less. One day he did a load of laundry (yay !), and as I was putting it up to dry, I noticed that there wasn't a single one piece of MY clothing in the entire load. I was baffled. That was ten years ago. Just last week, I have begun doing only my laundry and leaving his clothing in the hamper. He still hasn't noticed. I'm curious to how this will turn out...
Load More Replies... It seems to me that there is a communication problem, as she is grudging her husband for not knowing what she thinks he must do, instead of just plainly talk to him and tell him how she feels and what she needs. There are a lot of us men who believe in sharing the burden of house chores, raising the kids and providing an income, as neither of those tasks are exlusivly his or hers, but a thing that we certainly can't do as much as we would like to be able to, is to read minds
You don't have to read minds to SEE the dirty dishes in the sink and to DO THEM WITHOUT BEING ASKED !!!! You don't have to read minds to open your eyes and ask yourself what you can do to alleviate her workload. Why don't YOU ask HER what you can do for her instead of wanting HER to ask YOU for "help" ? She doesn't need you to "help" her, she needs you to do YOUR PART.
Load More Replies... We are not all Asses. As for the lady who said she "would love to know what it is like to be a man and just leave for work without a million things to do." seriously? If your man isn't helping out in an equal partnership then you are with the wrong man! Also if this lady feels the need to post this on social media and not speak directly to her partner, then there is other problems than a lazy husband.
This has really worked and I am proud to testify of it. If you are passing through difficulties in your relationship, LORD MERCOLA can help solve marital problems, restore broken relationships and He can also cure diseases like HIV, AIDS, Herpes Virus, Cancer, E.T.C Email him for urgent help. Email: lordmercolatemple@gmail.com or WhatsApp/Call him at +1 (845) 731-5610 Thank you LORD MERCOLA for the help
First off, airing your dirty laundry on facebook makes you a small person. This was unnecessary. Second off. Why did you have so many kids if you couldn't handle them? They're not pets, so please stop breeding indiscriminately. Thirdly, if you can't handle the job of being the stay at home parent. Switch. You get the job while he does the stay at home parenting, because in this economy running the breadwinner down by throwing more c**p on their plate is just going to get you fired and fired with kids is worse than tired with kids. Basically, breeding is a responsibility. Stop abusing it.
I saw this story on a new site and it made me so mad. If I were her husband I would feel betrayed and embarrassed. And if my spouse was throwing me to the wolves and airing dirty laundry so publicly, I would consider this being a non-marriage. How passive aggressive of her. And if it was for money, she exploited her husband for it. Maybe he doesn't mind, idk. But I think it's horrible and would never do that. I feel bad for him. His wife just screeched her grievances in front of everyone.
Dear Moms- you gotta give have the responsibility for the baby to the dad- from the very beginning. Make it your project, all in together, or separate the different chores coming along with the child. I often hear Mom s complaining- but if you don't give them the chance to learn how to take care of an infant- you can't expect them to care, just that one night, when you feel like taking a rest- it's always two
By posting it publicly, she probably helped other women in the same situation to find the words to express their feelings.
I think she posted it as a statement in support of the IDEA that moms work their asses of and many dads are oblivious. I'm sure she did talk to him in private... many times, but someone's it's nice to have someone commit to words what you also are experiencing. As a blogger/ writer, this is her forum...pretty much the same as complain ing to your friends at happy hour, but more far reaching. I dig it!
I'm sorry but i am one of those fathers that Helps out. We have 4 kids and one of them with autism.... And i work my a*s out at the office and at home to give them a better life , i may not be perfect but i help my wife with everything, i play with them, give them Baths, take them to sleep, i get up at night 90 % of the times they need attention during nighttime, i clean the house......The only thing i don't do is cooking and that is because i suck at it and don't want my kids to eat nasty food that will only make them sick.
Her post wasn't a generalization of all fathers, she was just sharing a problem she had with her husband. She wasn't attacking all fathers
Load More Replies... Must be nice!! I spoke up once to him and my own mother saying "I need help". I was met with them consorting together to try to take my son away from me. I asked if I could move in with my mother away from the father and she said "I don't think it's a good idea because D (my son) will be staying here." He was only there in the first place because I was forced to leave him with his father(even though I had already purchased a plane ticket for him) while I went to visit mine for the first time in years. Because I broke up with the father at the time. They claimed I abandoned my son and made a plan to keep him forever because I said I needed help. And instead of taking care of him he pawned my son off onto my mother because he had never done anything to take care of him since birth. I had to beg to get him to just give him 5mins of attention a week. And we planned this baby!!!!!
Women DO set a precedent! That is why I have warned both of my adult daughters to set the PROPER precedent from the start! I didnt, and I always had to take care of everything myself.
Someone on the replies to it is literally 'not all men'ing her. 'Way to paint all dads' he says. She literally does not generalise at all. She talks about her situation and the situations with her friends and some idiot still has to come along and try and undermine her complaints by being all not all dads are like this at her. Newsflash to the guys who do this - not everything is about you specifically. The world does not revolve around you. Other people actually exist in this world.
Shall we play a little numbers game? So lets say a mum stays at home, shes dooing the housework and carring for the kids. What does the statistics say about work hours? Well seeing from what you might read on the Internet it sounds like ..well 10 hours 12? 14 even? Nope, in Germany its between 2 to 3 Hours a day including cooking and all homework that has to be done. France, 2 to 3 hours. UK? 2 to 3 Hours. But okay shes in the US so it must be more there, right? Nope 2 to 3 hours. But childcare that takes a lot of time right? THats where the big part of the time is going right? Sorry no again, in Average and those numbers you can find all over the western States, about 1 to 1 and a half hours. SO At best were talking about a workload of 4 and a half hours a day. I can see why she needs help with that from her husband who in average is working about 7 and a half hours a day. And sure call for help on facebook, classy....
She posted this online to let other SAHM's know they're not alone. Just because you're the mom and stay at home with the kids doesn't mean you have to do everything and aren't allowed to ask for help.
Yeah seems weird to post it on facebook...However why do men not think they have to take more responsibility in general? It´s not like dishes, laundry, vaccuming etc is more pleasurable for women, we only do it cause the mens lazy arses aren´t and someone needs to or else the place will be a total wreck.
If there're two adults in charge of children, why one has to ask for help? Becase one has a D and the other doesn't. I call this patriarchy.
Why have kids with useless men. It's like they don't care at all that it's their child too. My father was like this, demanded everything from my mother, expected everything to be done, didn't even bother glancing our way now i can't even be bothered to hate him, i just don't care if he drops dead any second and i defo won't be there by his deathbed the same way he was never there in any shape or form for us.
Dear humans, Stop. Having. Children. I don't know if humans realize this, but 80% of the world's problems will be solved and/or slowed if we stop having kids for a generation. It's a sacrifice that people should make for future people. But, I understand. People are greedy and they want things. Now.
Your solution is everyone should stop having kids for a generation? I mean that's never going to happen but if it did there wouldn't be any future people to worry about. And anyway over population is not the problem. The problem is a small percentage of people in the most developed countries use the vast majority of resources.
Load More Replies... Sexual orientation doesn't matter. Everyone can have a good or bad relationship with their partner regardless.
Load More Replies... Seems to me that this is another topic, to be discussed another time, in a different place. Come back then.
Load More Replies...
117
110