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We're learning all our lives. But some things and experiences teach us more than others.

A month ago, Reddit user Artudetan posted a question on r/AskMen that read, "What did you not know or realize until after living with a woman?" Turns out, a lot!

From "the good bra" to doing the dishes, the post has already received over 14,000 answers and judging from them, getting a roommate can be quite educational!

#1

Men Share 'What Did You Not Know Or Realize Until After Living With A Woman?': And Here're 40 Of The Top Answers Fine, I'll say it.

I always thought that pads operated like Band-aids and they'd just slap em over their vaginas and absorb everything. It wasn't until I was... 27? When my girlfriend at the time had some as a backup in case she ran out of tampons and I opened it and looked. The adhesive was on the wrong side for my version of how they worked, and it dawned on me that they're supposed to be stuck to their panties, not their vaginas. I only regret telling her of that revelation, because she laughed until she cried and then called her mom to tell her about it.

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#2

Men Share 'What Did You Not Know Or Realize Until After Living With A Woman?': And Here're 40 Of The Top Answers When you’re having a really tough day, she unexpectedly comes home and surprises you with a bottle of your favorite drink, homemade cookies and a dinner you love. And then she cuddles with you while you vent about your now not so crappy day. And you realize what it’s like to actually have someone support you.

And you find yourself wanting to make sure the toilet seat is down, smiling when you can never find anything in the kitchen, rolling with it when the living room turns into a 12 stage laundry OCD deployment zone, and you laugh when you trip over her shoes that are now tangled in a knot of hair bigger than the dog.

Because your house/apartment is no longer a place you live at, it’s now your home. And it’s safe to be the real you, not the show you put on when you were dating.

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#3

Men Share 'What Did You Not Know Or Realize Until After Living With A Woman?': And Here're 40 Of The Top Answers That she owns only one truly GOOD BRA. There is only one and part of your duty as a man is to protect The Good Bra. If you are doing laundry, you must take the greatest of precautions to make sure it is properly cleaned, dried, and stored. God forbid The Good Bra ever turn up missing or in the wrong drawer.

Ladies, why is there only one GOOD BRA?

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Daria B
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes. Yes, there is. The one and only! ♡ Because, a product, to be mass-produced, it needs to be built within certain norms and patterns, but each woman has different breasts. As a result, it's difficult to find the perfect one, but once you do find it, it becomes precioussssss. Not to mention, these things aren't cheap either. (Waiting for replies of the ladies whose boobs need no support. Respect to you, sisters, but see... just because I don't need braces, I'm not protesting against the dentist industry.)

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#4

Men Share 'What Did You Not Know Or Realize Until After Living With A Woman?': And Here're 40 Of The Top Answers I was raised by a woman, so none of it was new to me, except:

Period Panties.

I wasn't shocked or disgusted by it because I wasn't a 12-year-old; it was just like, "Huh. Yeah, I guess I'd have a separate selection of underwear to use when I'm menstruating, too. Why the Hell would I ruin all of my sexy underwear?".

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#5

Men Share 'What Did You Not Know Or Realize Until After Living With A Woman?': And Here're 40 Of The Top Answers I learned that bathroom can smell like soap and flowers and coconut instead of like pee.

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#6

Men Share 'What Did You Not Know Or Realize Until After Living With A Woman?': And Here're 40 Of The Top Answers Apparently showering and washing your hair are separate events.

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Enuya
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Are they? Am I 'woman-ing' wrong since I am always doing it at the same time?

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sturmwesen
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Nope, it depends on your hair, styling, life style etc. For me it depends a lot on length: the shorter the more I wash it. If it is long I just put it in a ponytail if its not right.

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CatWoman312
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

And there’s basically 3 types of showers: the quick just clean yourself shower, the wash hair and clean yourself shower, and the shave/exfoliate, wash hair, and clean yourself shower. Some ladies like me will occasionally take a bath before a shower which would make an additional type of bathing experience

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Hidasi Kata
Community Member
1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I would recommend the other way around-shower first than bathing....more sanitary.

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Mimi777
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I wash my hair every time I shower lol it just doesn’t feel right if I just wash my body I have to wash everything

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Efia
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

same here. It feels wrong when only parts of your body are "clean". I can't separate those two procedures :D

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Shell
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have long hair and fibromyalgia, so absolutely seperate events. It's a good day if I c

lyndsayn17 avatar
Winx
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes, one takes 20 minutes, the other takes two and a half hours (at least for me lol)

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Edward Willis
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm not a woman, and my hair is rather short, but I couldn't imagine washing it every single time I had a shower. That's really a thing people do?

vickyz avatar
Vicky Z
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If you have shower every day they say it's not good to wash your hair also daily

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Ozacoter
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Only for the women with long hair. I clean my hair while i shower. Short hair rocks.

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somnomania
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

not for me, ever, but i also don't shower every day, and never have. nowadays i do have to shower pretty much every other day, and i don't understand people who take time to do it every day.

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Aroha
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have long hair and I wash it every time I shower. Doesn't damage my hair and I just love having clean hair, it never looks good on second day :).

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Oskar vanZandt
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I shower and wash my hair at the same time twice a week. On other days I just wash at the basin or only shower my body and wet my hair. My hair is fine and gets greasy if I wash it too often. Apparently some women like to use dry shampoo to clean their hair... it's very common in Asia and Africa according to Wikipedia. I guess it's also a good thing in places where there is a shortage of potable water.

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lenka
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I've been married for over 10 years and literally had this conversation with my husband last week. I guess it has just never come up before, but yeah, he was surprised that I dont wash my hair every day. Ain't no-one got time for that!

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M Kate McCulloch
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

huh... I don't shower every day - but I do wash my hair every time I shower.

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QueenMiri
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Exactly. There are three options. Shower with hair. Shower without hair. Just hair.

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zims
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I budget 5 minutes for a shower and 30 for a hair-washing shower, not including the post-shower braiding. If I blew-dry my hair it would be a lot longer.

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Kathryn Baylis
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Most of the time they are. But sometimes, if it’s reasonably clean, we’ll throw a shower cap over it and just wash everything else. It also depends on how long and thick your hair is—-the longer and thicker it is, the longer it takes to dry, not to mention style.

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Miss Cris
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wait, the lady on the pic is showering while wearing a dress????

dks001 avatar
DKS 001
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

there are times when I just wash my hair, and then wash off in the sink

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Veda De Decker
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have long and very thick hair. I laught pretty hard at this one, because i make a huge deal about washing my hair. It's something that influences both of our agendas and has to be held into account. Note : it takes a 45 min to an hour shower, getting all the shampoo in everywhere and decently rinsed, then if i need to condition it's a whole new thing...

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InfectedVoice
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm a dude with short hair and I don't wash my hair every time I shower either, it's bad to wash hair every day.

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Violet Smith
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Uh, that is not a universal. I wash my hair every time I shower.

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Bob Bobbins
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Same here. I was super confused when my wife said she only washes her hair 2-3 times a week, when I would see her shower way more than that. Guys do both every time as far as I know.

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ebonyruffles
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have so much crap in my hair I have to wash it every day. Spiking glue, wax, spray etc, etc.

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Pam Wilson-Hallinan
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Don't have time to do that every morning. Not good for the hair either!

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Autumn
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Well, for me, they aren’t separate events, I just don’t wash my hair every time I take a shower.

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Vasana Phong
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Hair care( mostly if more then shoulder length) are different, wait til you hear about the below the “waist “ area

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Tracy Wallick
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Hell, I'm a woman and I didn't learn this til my20s. Still wash it every day though, or my hair gets so greasy I wanna shave it all off

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Ingrid
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I shower twice a day, no way I would wash my hair twice a day

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Isabel Care
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If you have very thick, long hair it can take hours to wash and dry it properly, especially if you have low water pressure. I use clippers, so it takes a few seconds to wash it.

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Lilith the Demon Panda
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

not for me, I truly dont understand how someone can shower and not get the hair wet

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Miss Cris
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Because we can separate the shower from the wall and jet the water on parts of our body we need to wet, and not the others.

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Ivana
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I set my hair so it is a whole event to wash it. Gotta prep it with a mask, then wash it, let it air dry for a little bit, then put curlers in it after about 30-40 minutes of air drying. Must be done before 8pm or it won't be dry enough in the morning. Twice a week. Sunday night and Wednesday night.

vickyz avatar
Vicky Z
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

May i ask if you are from Russia? No offense but i have a Russian friend that does a very similar ritual for her hair! And she has gorgeous hair!

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Mimi M
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I stopped using shampoo. Now my hair is so much healthier (no longer stripped). I just rinse it well with warm water when I shower and towel it dry. In the winter I keep my scalp healthy with a few drops of water mixed with a bit of vinegar and a dissolved aspirin - no more itching or flaking.

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Anne
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

How.. I mean.. when you wash your hair, you definitely will shower at the same time.. or does your wife wash her hair in the sink.. I have questions..

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Jessica Aubé
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Huh? How are these seperate events ? Seriously there’s a bunch of woman out there who only wash their hair ?? Just get in the shower it’s way faster

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Tania Dubodiel
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Meaning that we shower every day but don't necessarily wash our hair every day? I have long and sensitive hair, if I washed it every day, it would look terrible.

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Nerdlife
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Can confirm! Washing your hair every day is bad for the hair and ain't nobody got time for that. Even women with short hair try not to wash their hair everyday.

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Linda HS
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Heck, yeah! Doesn't everyone know about this? These two ARE two separate events! Dah!🤦

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Lola
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Nope, not for me. I have never taken a daily shower without washing my hair. I think this depends on hair type too. And for those saying you can’t wash your hair everyday because you damage it, not true at all. Not to brag but my hair is healthy, long, and beautiful.

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Leigh C.
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Huh? Both at the same time is a given. Not sure how you can do one or the other. If I just want to bathe that's what baths are for. Just me.

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Madadh Sweeney
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is a girl thing I can't fathom, as I've gotten older I'm not as oily as I was in my youth, but not washing my hair daily is still something I just can't do very often.

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Melanie
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

🙄 DUH! You need to wash your body, but if you washed your hair each time it would a) take up too much time, and b) RUIN YOUR HAIR

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Jade Lynn - Panda's Brat
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Not for me most of the time, since I have dogs and I don't want to smell like dog when I go to work. Complete clean every morning. It's exhausting.

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Artoonist Corine
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My girls and I took "bowers" even. You start in a bath, then shower (mainly to wash hair) = bower

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SydneyP
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Not for me. However as I’ve said before I’m what one would call a boyish lesbian so I guess I don’t really count.

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#7

Men Share 'What Did You Not Know Or Realize Until After Living With A Woman?': And Here're 40 Of The Top Answers If you leave something on the kitchen counter, it will get put/thrown away. If she leaves something on the kitchen counter, that's where it goes now.

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I I
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

yep , when i cook my wife "tidies up" around me , only thing is i still need the things she's putting in the dishwasher

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#9

Men Share 'What Did You Not Know Or Realize Until After Living With A Woman?': And Here're 40 Of The Top Answers Pockets are very rare for women's pants. Several years married and still shocked by this.

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Thomas Price
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I didn’t realise this until my now wife showed me the pockets she had in her wedding dress. She was so excited.

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#11

When you’re done showering, you’re supposed to stay on the bath mat while you dry off, not walk around the apartment

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DKS 001
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I dry off in the shower so there are no wet foot prints outside the shower

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#12

They fart just as much as men.

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#13

Men Share 'What Did You Not Know Or Realize Until After Living With A Woman?': And Here're 40 Of The Top Answers Apparently, cleaning the toilet on the regular is much, much more important than I'd previously thought.

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#14

Men Share 'What Did You Not Know Or Realize Until After Living With A Woman?': And Here're 40 Of The Top Answers Just how expensive and shoddy brands for women are.

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Scagsy
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My wife always says 'Don't buy the pink razors, get the yellow ones please'.

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#15

Men Share 'What Did You Not Know Or Realize Until After Living With A Woman?': And Here're 40 Of The Top Answers How nice house plants are. Now I have all kinds of plants and my place feels so much more nice and relaxing.

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#16

Men Share 'What Did You Not Know Or Realize Until After Living With A Woman?': And Here're 40 Of The Top Answers There is a wrong way to hang clothes to dry.

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Francis
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes! My bf had to hang the laundry last week.. he tried. And failed xD had to rehang everything LOL

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#17

If they leave stuff at the bottom of the stairs, that means you’re supposed to bring it up. If it’s at the top of the stairs, you should bring it down. Also, the correct place for objects in the kitchen is where they currently reside. Stuff is gonna move around constantly, just roll with it.

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Linda van der Pal
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I do leave stuff on the stairs, but that's for whoever goes up first to bring along (and yes, that definitely includes myself)

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#18

Men Share 'What Did You Not Know Or Realize Until After Living With A Woman?': And Here're 40 Of The Top Answers They have a really weird obsession with glass containers or jars.

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Foxxy (The Original)
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Mine obsession can be any kind of storage including shoe boxes, takeaway containers etc.

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#19

Men Share 'What Did You Not Know Or Realize Until After Living With A Woman?': And Here're 40 Of The Top Answers Hair ties actually disappear faster than MIA socks. Until you find 20 in a kitchen drawer.

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#20

Men Share 'What Did You Not Know Or Realize Until After Living With A Woman?': And Here're 40 Of The Top Answers No matter how many bobby pins are in the house, there is always a need for more.

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Lauren Caswell
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

And hairties.buy a pack and you'll have heaps for a few weeks, then back to one somehow.

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#21

Men Share 'What Did You Not Know Or Realize Until After Living With A Woman?': And Here're 40 Of The Top Answers Women are both simultaneously messier and cleaner than men. It’s bizarre how messy rooms can get with them and how quickly they can turn it around and make it clean!

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#22

One corner of the shower will become a "graveyard" for bottles of shampoo, conditioner, all sorts of stuff.

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#23

Men Share 'What Did You Not Know Or Realize Until After Living With A Woman?': And Here're 40 Of The Top Answers An innocent cleaning excursion in the right circumstances will lead to a full-on reorganization of all the dang furniture in the house, if you're not careful.

nothanksreddit2 , kentwang Report

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Nerdlife
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

😂😂😂😂 I didn't realize until now that I do this very often

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#24

Men Share 'What Did You Not Know Or Realize Until After Living With A Woman?': And Here're 40 Of The Top Answers The hair that gets stuck in the shower drain. OMG.

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#25

Men Share 'What Did You Not Know Or Realize Until After Living With A Woman?': And Here're 40 Of The Top Answers You find out the amount of food that a refrigerator can really hold.

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Brendan
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I thought that a full fridge was more of a 'male' thing. It is for me and my two boys, anyway.

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#26

Men Share 'What Did You Not Know Or Realize Until After Living With A Woman?': And Here're 40 Of The Top Answers Fancy makeup takes a long time.

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#27

Men Share 'What Did You Not Know Or Realize Until After Living With A Woman?': And Here're 40 Of The Top Answers You’ve been doing laundry wrong your whole life.

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Nerdlife
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Now I am intrigued and curious to know what you did to find this out!

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#28

Men Share 'What Did You Not Know Or Realize Until After Living With A Woman?': And Here're 40 Of The Top Answers I never realised that she'd start wearing my clothes. T-shirts, sweaters, not even my damn underwear is mine any more!

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#29

Turns out RuPaul’s drag race is a great show

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#30

Men Share 'What Did You Not Know Or Realize Until After Living With A Woman?': And Here're 40 Of The Top Answers I load the dishwasher so inefficiently, I'm no longer allowed to load it at all.

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Sophie Greeff
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Girl here I'm not allowed to load the dishwasher as i do it wrong husband is in charge

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#31

Men Share 'What Did You Not Know Or Realize Until After Living With A Woman?': And Here're 40 Of The Top Answers I have freaked out too many times at what I thought was a 52-legged spider clinging to my bathroom wall.

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Lauren Caswell
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You do this so you don't need to unclog your shower weekly. But you don't leave it on the wall, it should be binned before you leave the bathroom

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#32

Men Share 'What Did You Not Know Or Realize Until After Living With A Woman?': And Here're 40 Of The Top Answers That there can never be enough throws/blankets/cushions.

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#33

Men Share 'What Did You Not Know Or Realize Until After Living With A Woman?': And Here're 40 Of The Top Answers That moisturizer goes on the body too.

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Dark Pigeon
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Well yes, the lotion or moisturizer goes on the skin. Or you get the hoze again

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#34

Strange new foods will appear in the cupboard and the fridge. This is actually good, you will get to try new things.

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#35

Men Share 'What Did You Not Know Or Realize Until After Living With A Woman?': And Here're 40 Of The Top Answers The wardrobe in your bedroom that you agreed to share 50/50? Just like the bathroom, in a few years it will be 90/10.

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#36

Men Share 'What Did You Not Know Or Realize Until After Living With A Woman?': And Here're 40 Of The Top Answers There is an incorrect place for hand soap on the sink.

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#37

No matter how much you vacuum or sweep the floor, there will ALWAYS be hair in the floor.

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#39

Men Share 'What Did You Not Know Or Realize Until After Living With A Woman?': And Here're 40 Of The Top Answers When long, loose head hairs wash off in the shower, it's common practice to stick them to the wall rather than let them collect in the drain.

If she forgets to remove them afterwards, it can be very confusing for the next person in the shower. Why are there a bunch of individual strands of hair deliberately stuck to the wall?

Professor_Brooks , soapbeard Report

#40

Men Share 'What Did You Not Know Or Realize Until After Living With A Woman?': And Here're 40 Of The Top Answers They're not nearly as neat and tidy as they want you to believe.

MystikxHaze , crimsonninjagirl Report

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Jessica Aubé
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ya so ... let’s not generalize woman ... some woman are clean freaks others are in the middle and others are the opposite ... this is not a female trait .. this is a human being trait ... please stop putting woman in charge of cleaning and making them feel like if they don’t keep their house spotless there’s something wrong with them

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