Whether we like it or not, conflicts are inevitable in any long-term relationship. Nearly everyone knows that finding someone you can be completely honest with comes with many ups and downs that reveal the most annoying behaviors imaginable. But while some disagreements can get seriously spicy, partners also often lose control and get angry over absolutely nothing.
Attorney, advocate, and author Rabia Chaudry set out on a mission to discover the stupidest and most meaningless arguments married couples "just cannot, will not stop having". Her Twitter thread quickly blew up with people opening up about the most infuriating habits their spouses have that make them fight about it for years.
From never squishing out the sponge to refusing to close the drawers all the way, every couple has things they repeatedly return to because both sides refuse to back down. Continue scrolling because we’ve selected some of the funniest examples from the thread. Upvote the ones you can relate to all too well, and be sure to share your own pet peeves with us in the comments!
Image credits: rabiasquared
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Mine leaves the sponge in the sink, every time, and it's always in the one spot with water and the food he didn't clean out. I have to throw it out
If Rabia Chaudry’s name sounds familiar, it might be because she’s the author of the New York Times bestselling book Adnan's Story. She has also amassed quite a following on Twitter where almost 202K users are engaged in what she has to say and, luckily for us, share their own funny and genuine stories. The post in question, which has received over 19K likes, proved that couples all over the world get peeved off by the most foolish things.
Hundreds of replies on this thread had to do with household tasks not being completed correctly. Well, at least in their partner's eyes. But whether you’re in a meaningful relationship or decided to tie the knot, sharing a space together is bound to be at least a bit of a challenge. At the bare minimum, you’ll have a partner that tells you you never fold the socks right.
I believe some decorative plastic fruit would solve this problem. No rotting = no more buying fruit.
When you decide to be with one person for a long time, it's only natural for the quirks you found sweet at the beginning of the relationship to irritate you as time flies. But those little habits sure have a way of blowing up into a major argument or at least something you always have at the back of your mind.
But not all fights are created equal. While some are more severe and worth talking through, others are downright ridiculous and illogical. "Partners often say, 'We argue over stupid things,'" licensed relationship therapist Dr. Jason N. Linder wrote in Psychology Today. "This is somewhat true. That said, there are a lot more things partners are actually arguing about under the surface than what meets the eye, especially for the partners themselves."
We have a TV series about these people: Help, my husband is a handyman.
It's entirely possible he has ADD/ADHD? We're TERRIBLE at finishing projects. It's not an excuse, but if he gets diagnosed then he can seek help (therapy, medication, even an ADHD Coach- whatever works). Just food for thought.
Yeah even just being aware of it can help. You can catch yourself doing it at work or other places.
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how so? i've never heard of semi-completed tasks to be a symptom (m just generally curious)
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Hire a handsome guy to finish his abandoned stuff. Sit, drink coffee, watch , and hubby will catch on if you let him see. Sorry, worked for me better than the screaming and I was in a much better mood toward hubby when handyman was finished. In many ways.
My husband half asses so many things. He sees it as well it's half done that's better than not done at all. Omg no! He'll sweep but leave the piles of dust. He'll empty the dishwasher but won't fill it. He'll clean the sink but only the inside not around it. It's constant extra work for me bc I have to go behind him and finish what he starts while I'm doing what i need to do which is actually clean. Thank god i was able to hire my house cleaner back after everyone was vaccinated
Mine pretends to clean up. I find slightly opened paint cans/ rollers shoved behind the washer/ dryer and painters tape in the linens (kept on a shelf above the washer and dryer) whenever he does any painting. I have to follow him around when he does projects or he loses tools all over the house. I love him but he is the most absent minded dork in the world.
So decide to either stay insane or have a talk with him and if talk doesn't do any good
Thoughts: 1) I'm disturbed by the lack of communication and inability to see things from another's point of view. 2) From personal observation, I've concluded that half of all men make terrible roommates as do half of all women. My assumption is that half of the complaints are legitimate and the other half are from clueless whiners who have too much time on their hands. 3) I'm guilty being a 90% / 10% project/repair completer (I'll work 5.5 hrs of a 6 hr. job,, then do the last half hour later because I run out of steam). 4) It seems the OP is ungrateful that her husband saved 100 ($, £,€) by doing a project that could have been hired out. A project that she and the commenters below don't claim to be able to do themselves. This LITTLE job put $50 in her pocket or $100 shared. Is putting away your husbands caulk gun and cleaning the tub worth $50. If yes, say "thank you". If my SO planned, shopped, cooked, cleaned 95% of dinner & "burdened" me w/ 5% of the easy work ...YES please!
Beside heartfelt discussion, I've found INEFFICIENCY in chore division to be a great solution. Instead of having the husband shovel snow for 60 min., both partners go outside and work for 45 minutes. Then, if clothes need to be folded after this chore, both people can do that together. Time could be saved if each person did what they are best at, but I think this often leads to perceived lack of appreciation for what the other person does. My other solution involves letting one person divide the chores in a way they think is fair and then let the other person chose which half they will do. This works if people are rational, but I once saw young sisters arguing over how to split a dessert. When they were told one of you cuts the piece in half and the other chooses I thought this was a great solution. But then I saw the crestfallen look on both girls faces. They didn't want a solution. They wanted to argue and "win" the fight. They weren't trying to be partners -- see most comments
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I have ADHD and started remodeling the bathroom and abandoned the task near the end. I didn't everything except the caulking lol
I never fight about his any longer . I call someone to fix it without even talking about it.
I bet he has ADD. I don't mean that as a joke or a putdown. My husband has it bad. It's easy to describe it as 'being forgetful' of 'like a child' but it's so much more pernicious.
I have been waiting 4 years for the front of the 'new' dishwasher skirting-panel-thingy to be put on...
Sounds like me but j was recently diagnosed with Adult ADHD by my therapist. I personally think if no one is going to praise him or ensure the task gets done why not abandon for a minute or and eon?
My father's the same way, which turned my brother into it. And yes, it pisses me off.
My husband does this, too. I'm gonna start throwing away tools next time I am left to finish a project for him. Putting everything away and cleaning is the last steps!!
Ai yi yi.... My hubby and I have the same problem..... except it's ME..... I do this🤦🏻♀️..... I don't know why he puts up w me🤷🏻♀️. I'm just so thankful and appreciates that he does🙏🏻💗🤗. He's for sure a Saint😇!
I assume the intention of the post is something else, but the example sounds more like he doesn't clean up after he's done, rather than "not finishing the last 5%".
I have decided my husband does this because he is convinced that if he actually finishes something he will die because his mission has been completed.
Unloads the dishwasher down to the last 2 dishes, I fork and maybe a plastic bowl left. Then walks away. Tickles me to no end.
This says to me that he's never done this kind of work professionally. Either that or he has done it professionally and has a helper assigned to these tasks. The goal is something that works. Once it should work, his job is done. (In his thinking) where the actual goal is a finished product. Let him have a break, an hour or a day depends on time available. In a non accusing way, ask him if the job looks finished. If he says yes, say you thought he was still working on it because there were tools or it wasn't cleaned up yet. Let him address that. Once it becomes the expectation, he should adapt.
Maybe op should consider ADHD/inattentive ADD as a possible diagnosis. This is a perfect description of the resulting work of someone with that brain.
"Focusing on the content of arguments (i.e who forgot to mail the important package) misses the forest for the trees. What fights are really about is the emotional safety in a relationship, partner's subjective sense of the other’s caring from them (or being there for them), and fear that they will get hurt."
He explained that getting to what’s underneath leads us to the cause of arguments and relationship distress. "Partners need to learn to reach out to each other with those feelings such as sadness about the disconnection, feelings of failure or inadequacy, or fear of rejection.”
Unfortunately, it might be easy to fall into the trap of thinking that fighting with your partner is a bad sign for the relationship itself. But we all know that every single couple has had at least one or two arguments. In fact, experts say that such disagreements can also be beneficial.
"I am more worried about my clients who say they never argue with their partners,” Maryann W. Mathai, a licensed counselor who specializes in helping people heal from toxic relationships, told Bustle. "It signals passivity, emotions being ignored, or a lack of self in the relationship — all of which are unhealthy."
Next time put their laundry around the washing machine. When there are no clean clothes for them anymore, they will understand.
I can sympathize with this, as you may have water on the floor if the shower is not closed off enough, and open drawers kill shinbones.
Chores and other responsibilities are some of the most common argument topics between married couples. It’s important to distinguish, however, whether these silly quarrels are healthy or toxic for your relationship. For example, if you start nitpicking your partner about the way they wash the dishes but end up blatantly declaring you dislike the company of their parents, that’s a red flag for toxic communication patterns. When arguing, you stay focused on the topic and issue at hand, so avoid looking for opportunities to air other grievances.
Ahh... I guess I remove eggs like OP's wife... because we usually grab the carton from one end or the other, not in the front 'n' center... so the weight is evenly distributed...
Mathai explained that while it is normal to need space after a disagreement, routinely withdrawing for days at a time shows your fights could be toxic. "Researchers have shown that stonewalling, the term for withdrawing and avoidance, is a predictor of divorce," she added. "Shutting down and emotionally leaving the conversation will trigger the other partner to feel alone and overwhelmed."
"You both may have different needs or time frames to cool down after an argument, but a sign of healthy relationships is [that] couples come back to each other quickly," Mathai explained. "There is truth behind the old saying 'Never go to bed angry.'"
After all, we're all guilty of having weird little quirks that might annoy people around us. Some of these behaviors are more benign, others are pretty bizarre. But as they say, communication is key, so if you find a way to talk through them and even sometimes kindly poke fun at them, you might be on the right path.
I feel like the couples arguing over bars of soap should switch to liquid body wash. :)
omg... my dad was like this... no matter how much time he had before the family had to leave for whatever... the MOMENT we're supposed to go out the door.... he had to go to the bathroom. It was. so. odd.
Meanwhile he’s like “My wife is great, always puts gas in my car for me!”
Pretend you didn't hear that he said something and keep pretending until he speaks so you can understand him. Rinse and repeat for as long as it takes to get the message home. I took me 6 weeks to teach my wife that, since I'm getting deaf, I can't hear her when she's whispering from the other side of the room.
Put it in random places. On his pillow, his dashboard, in his drawers, at a crime scene.
I've learned to preface some questions with "It's yes or no question. One-word answer only. (Fill in question)." B/c I got tired of essay answers to yes-no questions. We've gotten around it over the years, but twenty-five years ago? It'd take him ten minutes to answer "yes" or "no" or for me to work out which it was. And the question would be something like, "Do you want dessert?"
My ex said it was an "accident" when she slept with someone else. What does that mean? He tripped and his d**k fell into your vagina?
Wanna swap? I'm like that, if it's important put it away. My partner leaves everything anywhere and when he can't find it, he'd buy a new one or ask for a copy. Then leaves it anywhere and buys a third one when he can't find the previous two. I lost count of how many superglue, toothpick packs, torches, sealants and tin openers I found last time I went on a cleanup bender
Note: this post originally had 105 images. It’s been shortened to the top 40 images based on user votes.
Dirty socks. He leaves his everywhere but the hamper. Stairs. Floors. Tabletops. Chairs. *top of the refrigerator*. We came to an understanding about 15 years ago (we're together about 30) taht socks left outside hampers are not to be laundered, and socks atop the fridge are *trash*. That at least got the dirty socks out of the kitchen.
He leaves clothes all over the house (except the laundry basket). If i dont clean the ones that are "dirty" he gets anoyed. But if i clean all and he considers that some "were clean" he gets anoyed as well. How am I supposed to know which ones are which? Just put the f*****g dirty clothes in the basket and the others aside. I have a drawer for my "I can still reuse" clothes. Its not rcoket science. Also he refuses to separate clothes (I used to do a normal and a delicate wash) but then he complains that his tshirts get old fast... Men!
I'm all for if they don't like the way I do the laundry, they can do their own and get mad at themselves when it's not done right.
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My mom's big one. Dad will use like 3 pans just to make breakfast and leaves for work without cleaning up after himself.
Putting the dirty dishes in the sink rather than directly into the empty dishwasher right next to the sink. Then letting said dishes pile up so that filling the dishwasher becomes a whole chore that could have been avoided if he'd put things into the dishwasher as soon as he was done with them. I love the man, but I will never understand this.
My take away from this list is that an alarmingly large percentage of adults in this world are childish little sh*ts. Likely the result of so many parents more concerned with being their kids "friend" than actually doing any parenting.
This is why I give son a weekly allowance for KEEPING his room and shared spaces clean instead of just paying him for cleaning up his messed up room.
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I must say, I'm happy I don't have to share a house with *any* of these people, either the complainers or the "complainees."
He always has "his" roll of toilet paper sitting on top of all the toilet tanks. Uses this one, even though the one on the wall is obviously within easy reach, plus I keep 4-6 rolls of spares on a little shelf also within easy reach. Why?! I always have to move it to clean the toilet. Plus it looks weird if we have guests. 20 years now. Whenever I used to ask him about it he would say "Just a mystery of life."
Don't know why, but your last sentence cracked me up! 😂
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Breadboard is always coated with crumbs and coffee grounds, with one or two dirty knives on it. He's meticulous about keeping his tools clean and organized in the garage, but what about those kitchen tools?
Yes! Breadboard is always dirty. The counter above the cat food drawer always has cat food and empty cans all over it. The counter where the coffee goes is covered in coffee. Every morning there is an empty bowl with dried up egg on the bottom next to the stove. I used to like to cook. But now I have to clean the kitchen for 2 hours if I want to cook.
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My finance puts food scraps into the sink and not the rubbish bin 😡 I have to scrape them out by hand...
Eeeee noooo, I'm so sorry! I'd break that habit fast. Nasty.
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Being single is the best thing ever!!!! Sorry, not sorry about your miserable married lives!!!!
All the comments are so negative. Just because a spouse does something that's annoying doesn't mean the relationship is toxic. Jeez people, lighten up.
It is though, why would you be with a pain in the a*s. It's simple "X bothers me" and an answer of "I don't care, stay mad", so apparently mostly men are just like that so they don't need accountability, cause its 'normal'
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Mine does a lot of outside lawn work and constantly tracks mud and mulch and dirt through the house for 6 months straight. If he does take his shoes off he puts them where I will definitely trip over them. I've broken my tailbone bc he left his shoes which are huge in the living room walkway where I let my dogs out at night. Fell so hard I heard it crack. He also drops stuff on the floor while eating and does not pick it up. I watched him do this at his moms house too. For 22 yrs! If he gets crumbs on his shirt he rakes it off on to the floor. He doesn't even know he's doing it. It's so weird. Lately he's not done any dishes at all for the past year. That's a new frustration
He also lives out of the clean clothes basket, but puts "still going to wear clothes" into it also... along with on the floor. I just push it all over to "his" side of the room if it encroaches in my territory. 30 years of marriage. Compromises all over as I can be a pain in the ass too. Damn, I love him. Clothes on the floor and all.
My mom gets very annoyed at my dad’s habit of keeping EVERYTHING. Any documents, boxes of expensive stuff that might be returned, every single piece of paper that could ever be needed again. He tries to clean it up but forgets, so she does it instead. Most recent find is two envelopes from something neatly stuffed inside another envelope. Hope those weren’t super important, cause they’re gone now. Also, he has a magnetic clip to attach all his papers too and the deal is that when the clip gets so heavy that the magnet won’t hold it up, he has to sort through it all.
When I'd b!tch at my ex for not helping clean the house his answer was alway "I pick my socks up!"
Not replacing tp roll in holder and not putting dirty dishes in dishwasher even though it is right there drives me insane!
Where to start ? He wears the same underwear for 3 days straight. He breathes through his mouth even though there's nothing wrong with his nose. He spills coffee and or jelly on EVERY kitchen surface. He's so flippin passive that he won't tell me what he wants then gets grumpy if I do or pick something he doesn't like or wants. Drives me bat s**t! We actually had an argument about him asserting himself! He actually argued with me about not arguing with me! I had to laugh. Lolz
Me: Your parents are assholes and treat us like s**t. They don't come over when they said they would, constantly criticize our every move and only hear their own voices. Hubby: But they're my family..
Stopping to stand and think (?) in the doorway of a room. Every time. Excuse me.
All this time I have been thinking that my OCD has been off the chain after the pandemic. Now I realize I'm just fine. It's just me and my adult (26yo) son, so my house rules are mine. He doesn't do stuff the way I prefer, but I just "correct" unless it is unhealthy or dangerous, then explain to him why. I have given up on his room. Disorder is his order.
Practices music (loudly) while I’m sleeping. I’ve asked him to ask first or at least check that I’m awake before he practices but he refuses because he “doesn’t want to bother me”… how tf does that make any sense?? Also, his one job around the house is to make dinner for the 2 of us because I’m chronically ill and disabled and can’t cook. If he isn’t hungry that day he just doesn’t cook. Doesn’t tell me that he’s not making dinner or ask if I want to order food, he just doesn’t do it and I only find out that we aren’t eating that day after he goes to bed (we only eat one meal a day so idk how he isn’t starving and keeps forgetting to cook)
Squishy soap lady: let him have his own soap with extra squish if he likes. Toothpaste tube lady: get him his own tube to mangle as he sees fit. For all the hamper avoidance: I have no help for you. 20 years together and he still won't use the hamper.
No matter who you’re living with (friend, boy/girlfriend, wife, husband, parent, grandparent) do NOT be a bad roommate. Always strive to be a respectful house partner.
Leaving the cordless house phone next to the charger base and letting it go dead. Or letting the batter get so low that when you answer the phone, it won't connect or beeps the while time!
Mine loves to put groceries in the cabinet sweet right? Not when the groceries are still in the bags from the store, or like he walks out of the car and ALWAYS leaves the door open, doesn’t matter if I’m a parking lot, in the middle of nowhere door is always open and I have to close the door. He also loves to take showers and somehow always misses the rug and drip water all over the bathroom as he leaves his clothes on the floor with an empty laundry basket next to him. Oh also leaves everything open wrappers on tables next to the bed you name it waiting for me to pick it up. Ugh I can relate to so many on this page.
True happiness lies in letting things go. We all do things that bother other people but the more time we spend being frustrated, the more we'll view that person as a source of frustration. Why not love them for it? For example: This silly guy keeps doing (insert meaningless thing I hate). Just one of his quirks but I love him so I love his quirks too. Once I started viewing it like that, I found myself to be much happier and less stressed. We argue a lot less now.
We have different taste in room temperature, my husband And i. He likes it way colder, but we keep our apartment on my preferable temperature. Therefore the first thing He does when he comes home Is to strip to his t-shirt And boxers. Nothing Wrong with that. Except He does this on the hallway next to coathanger, And He puts his pants on said coathanger. It's floaded with his pants, sweaters and sweatshirts, so i have nowhere to put my And our kids jackets... We have walk-in closet right next to the coathanger...
It's ok to use a bath towel more than once. Hang it over the shower curtain rod to dry and use it a few times. It's only been used to wipe water off a clean body. It's still clean. Also eliminates half the laundry loads
Feet with socks on are ok to put on sofa, dirty socks off feet are not ok left on sofa cushions.
For 15 years : Xmas = he wants to buy 10 one dollar 'gifts', I thought one ten dollar gift was better... divorced, stayed friends - he passed suddenly earlier this month... it all seems so petty now...
Leaving empty cans, more notable beer cans. In the shower, on the counter, night stand, garage, next to the garbage can. Really? Gross. I started leaving my cans laying around until he finally made a comment, then I said, hmmm 🤔 yeah I hate it when that happens.
I'm a fat lazy slob that sleeps too much because I should know how to handle my depression even though pills and therapy are not acceptable. And I don't get a choice to have lights turned on, 3 TVs on and I don't get to choose a channel. (I also don't sleep well with the TV on, but it is on and loud every night.)
You are angry at yourself for chosing these creatures to be your life partners.
Stuffing stuff into the nearest cabinet or drawer and than wanting to be praised for tidying up so well. But she gets annoyed if I cannot find something that she wants me to get for her.
Never closes cupboards, laundry next to basket, used tissue and napkins everywhere, scratches his feet on everything, squeezes toothpaste in the middle, never throws away mail EVER, files important papers in random books, nicknacks he doesn't even know what it is are on every surface-makes me scream. Believes house cleaning only needs to be done twice a year.
He won't put his clean clothes away then bitches that he doesn't have anything to wear.
The vast majority of complaints is that he does something not right, or bad. Either this thread is biased, or men and women are different? If they are different in these ways, there will be differences, where it is less shiny for her. If there are no differences, this is biased.
I think a lot of women notice more details. Obviously it’s not across the board.
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Half of these were "my husband has a different opinion than me, and that makes him stupid." The other half was laundry on the floor. I'm so glad I'm gay.
The kitchen surfaces are not shelves....they're to give us space to prep and make food on. The sides of the bath are not shelves, and certainly not ones that should have fresh loo rolls balanced on instead of replacing the old one in the holder. The wooden box at the end of the bed is not a shelf... it's a container for storing our bedding. The floor is not a shelf for worn clothing.. it's a surface for walking on. The kitchen table is not a shelf for anything you can't think of a home for right now, we shouldn't have to clear everything off it before we can put a couple of plates down. The top of the wash basket is not a shelf, the lid often needs to be lifted. Those little squares that I had lying around when you moved in? I call them coasters... they are not decoration, they ARE shelves. Little tiny shelves you can put drinks on so they don't mark the furniture. We don't row about anything really but mess and clutter is the one thing we come close to on.
Why does your rule have to be THE rule? YOU DECIDED that the kitchen counter is not a space to store stuff, and is only a space to prep food. Your spouse may have decided otherwise. Why does YOUR decision have to be THE decision?
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A lot of these are just the OP making things a bigger deal than they are or are upset that their SO doesn't do things the exact same way they do.
That's ... exactly the point of this list.... they didn't ask for legitimate things, they asked for trivial things lol
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My hubby and I always fight over who has more bed and blanket lol.
Most of these are petty. Learn to love your partner even with their flaws.
The amount of people commenting "get separate bedrooms" is concerning
Dirty socks. He leaves his everywhere but the hamper. Stairs. Floors. Tabletops. Chairs. *top of the refrigerator*. We came to an understanding about 15 years ago (we're together about 30) taht socks left outside hampers are not to be laundered, and socks atop the fridge are *trash*. That at least got the dirty socks out of the kitchen.
He leaves clothes all over the house (except the laundry basket). If i dont clean the ones that are "dirty" he gets anoyed. But if i clean all and he considers that some "were clean" he gets anoyed as well. How am I supposed to know which ones are which? Just put the f*****g dirty clothes in the basket and the others aside. I have a drawer for my "I can still reuse" clothes. Its not rcoket science. Also he refuses to separate clothes (I used to do a normal and a delicate wash) but then he complains that his tshirts get old fast... Men!
I'm all for if they don't like the way I do the laundry, they can do their own and get mad at themselves when it's not done right.
Load More Replies... My mom's big one. Dad will use like 3 pans just to make breakfast and leaves for work without cleaning up after himself.
Putting the dirty dishes in the sink rather than directly into the empty dishwasher right next to the sink. Then letting said dishes pile up so that filling the dishwasher becomes a whole chore that could have been avoided if he'd put things into the dishwasher as soon as he was done with them. I love the man, but I will never understand this.
My take away from this list is that an alarmingly large percentage of adults in this world are childish little sh*ts. Likely the result of so many parents more concerned with being their kids "friend" than actually doing any parenting.
This is why I give son a weekly allowance for KEEPING his room and shared spaces clean instead of just paying him for cleaning up his messed up room.
Load More Replies... I must say, I'm happy I don't have to share a house with *any* of these people, either the complainers or the "complainees."
He always has "his" roll of toilet paper sitting on top of all the toilet tanks. Uses this one, even though the one on the wall is obviously within easy reach, plus I keep 4-6 rolls of spares on a little shelf also within easy reach. Why?! I always have to move it to clean the toilet. Plus it looks weird if we have guests. 20 years now. Whenever I used to ask him about it he would say "Just a mystery of life."
Don't know why, but your last sentence cracked me up! 😂
Load More Replies... Breadboard is always coated with crumbs and coffee grounds, with one or two dirty knives on it. He's meticulous about keeping his tools clean and organized in the garage, but what about those kitchen tools?
Yes! Breadboard is always dirty. The counter above the cat food drawer always has cat food and empty cans all over it. The counter where the coffee goes is covered in coffee. Every morning there is an empty bowl with dried up egg on the bottom next to the stove. I used to like to cook. But now I have to clean the kitchen for 2 hours if I want to cook.
Load More Replies... My finance puts food scraps into the sink and not the rubbish bin 😡 I have to scrape them out by hand...
Eeeee noooo, I'm so sorry! I'd break that habit fast. Nasty.
Load More Replies... Being single is the best thing ever!!!! Sorry, not sorry about your miserable married lives!!!!
All the comments are so negative. Just because a spouse does something that's annoying doesn't mean the relationship is toxic. Jeez people, lighten up.
It is though, why would you be with a pain in the a*s. It's simple "X bothers me" and an answer of "I don't care, stay mad", so apparently mostly men are just like that so they don't need accountability, cause its 'normal'
Load More Replies... Mine does a lot of outside lawn work and constantly tracks mud and mulch and dirt through the house for 6 months straight. If he does take his shoes off he puts them where I will definitely trip over them. I've broken my tailbone bc he left his shoes which are huge in the living room walkway where I let my dogs out at night. Fell so hard I heard it crack. He also drops stuff on the floor while eating and does not pick it up. I watched him do this at his moms house too. For 22 yrs! If he gets crumbs on his shirt he rakes it off on to the floor. He doesn't even know he's doing it. It's so weird. Lately he's not done any dishes at all for the past year. That's a new frustration
He also lives out of the clean clothes basket, but puts "still going to wear clothes" into it also... along with on the floor. I just push it all over to "his" side of the room if it encroaches in my territory. 30 years of marriage. Compromises all over as I can be a pain in the ass too. Damn, I love him. Clothes on the floor and all.
My mom gets very annoyed at my dad’s habit of keeping EVERYTHING. Any documents, boxes of expensive stuff that might be returned, every single piece of paper that could ever be needed again. He tries to clean it up but forgets, so she does it instead. Most recent find is two envelopes from something neatly stuffed inside another envelope. Hope those weren’t super important, cause they’re gone now. Also, he has a magnetic clip to attach all his papers too and the deal is that when the clip gets so heavy that the magnet won’t hold it up, he has to sort through it all.
When I'd b!tch at my ex for not helping clean the house his answer was alway "I pick my socks up!"
Not replacing tp roll in holder and not putting dirty dishes in dishwasher even though it is right there drives me insane!
Where to start ? He wears the same underwear for 3 days straight. He breathes through his mouth even though there's nothing wrong with his nose. He spills coffee and or jelly on EVERY kitchen surface. He's so flippin passive that he won't tell me what he wants then gets grumpy if I do or pick something he doesn't like or wants. Drives me bat s**t! We actually had an argument about him asserting himself! He actually argued with me about not arguing with me! I had to laugh. Lolz
Me: Your parents are assholes and treat us like s**t. They don't come over when they said they would, constantly criticize our every move and only hear their own voices. Hubby: But they're my family..
Stopping to stand and think (?) in the doorway of a room. Every time. Excuse me.
All this time I have been thinking that my OCD has been off the chain after the pandemic. Now I realize I'm just fine. It's just me and my adult (26yo) son, so my house rules are mine. He doesn't do stuff the way I prefer, but I just "correct" unless it is unhealthy or dangerous, then explain to him why. I have given up on his room. Disorder is his order.
Practices music (loudly) while I’m sleeping. I’ve asked him to ask first or at least check that I’m awake before he practices but he refuses because he “doesn’t want to bother me”… how tf does that make any sense?? Also, his one job around the house is to make dinner for the 2 of us because I’m chronically ill and disabled and can’t cook. If he isn’t hungry that day he just doesn’t cook. Doesn’t tell me that he’s not making dinner or ask if I want to order food, he just doesn’t do it and I only find out that we aren’t eating that day after he goes to bed (we only eat one meal a day so idk how he isn’t starving and keeps forgetting to cook)
Squishy soap lady: let him have his own soap with extra squish if he likes. Toothpaste tube lady: get him his own tube to mangle as he sees fit. For all the hamper avoidance: I have no help for you. 20 years together and he still won't use the hamper.
No matter who you’re living with (friend, boy/girlfriend, wife, husband, parent, grandparent) do NOT be a bad roommate. Always strive to be a respectful house partner.
Leaving the cordless house phone next to the charger base and letting it go dead. Or letting the batter get so low that when you answer the phone, it won't connect or beeps the while time!
Mine loves to put groceries in the cabinet sweet right? Not when the groceries are still in the bags from the store, or like he walks out of the car and ALWAYS leaves the door open, doesn’t matter if I’m a parking lot, in the middle of nowhere door is always open and I have to close the door. He also loves to take showers and somehow always misses the rug and drip water all over the bathroom as he leaves his clothes on the floor with an empty laundry basket next to him. Oh also leaves everything open wrappers on tables next to the bed you name it waiting for me to pick it up. Ugh I can relate to so many on this page.
True happiness lies in letting things go. We all do things that bother other people but the more time we spend being frustrated, the more we'll view that person as a source of frustration. Why not love them for it? For example: This silly guy keeps doing (insert meaningless thing I hate). Just one of his quirks but I love him so I love his quirks too. Once I started viewing it like that, I found myself to be much happier and less stressed. We argue a lot less now.
We have different taste in room temperature, my husband And i. He likes it way colder, but we keep our apartment on my preferable temperature. Therefore the first thing He does when he comes home Is to strip to his t-shirt And boxers. Nothing Wrong with that. Except He does this on the hallway next to coathanger, And He puts his pants on said coathanger. It's floaded with his pants, sweaters and sweatshirts, so i have nowhere to put my And our kids jackets... We have walk-in closet right next to the coathanger...
It's ok to use a bath towel more than once. Hang it over the shower curtain rod to dry and use it a few times. It's only been used to wipe water off a clean body. It's still clean. Also eliminates half the laundry loads
Feet with socks on are ok to put on sofa, dirty socks off feet are not ok left on sofa cushions.
For 15 years : Xmas = he wants to buy 10 one dollar 'gifts', I thought one ten dollar gift was better... divorced, stayed friends - he passed suddenly earlier this month... it all seems so petty now...
Leaving empty cans, more notable beer cans. In the shower, on the counter, night stand, garage, next to the garbage can. Really? Gross. I started leaving my cans laying around until he finally made a comment, then I said, hmmm 🤔 yeah I hate it when that happens.
I'm a fat lazy slob that sleeps too much because I should know how to handle my depression even though pills and therapy are not acceptable. And I don't get a choice to have lights turned on, 3 TVs on and I don't get to choose a channel. (I also don't sleep well with the TV on, but it is on and loud every night.)
You are angry at yourself for chosing these creatures to be your life partners.
Stuffing stuff into the nearest cabinet or drawer and than wanting to be praised for tidying up so well. But she gets annoyed if I cannot find something that she wants me to get for her.
Never closes cupboards, laundry next to basket, used tissue and napkins everywhere, scratches his feet on everything, squeezes toothpaste in the middle, never throws away mail EVER, files important papers in random books, nicknacks he doesn't even know what it is are on every surface-makes me scream. Believes house cleaning only needs to be done twice a year.
He won't put his clean clothes away then bitches that he doesn't have anything to wear.
The vast majority of complaints is that he does something not right, or bad. Either this thread is biased, or men and women are different? If they are different in these ways, there will be differences, where it is less shiny for her. If there are no differences, this is biased.
I think a lot of women notice more details. Obviously it’s not across the board.
Load More Replies... Half of these were "my husband has a different opinion than me, and that makes him stupid." The other half was laundry on the floor. I'm so glad I'm gay.
The kitchen surfaces are not shelves....they're to give us space to prep and make food on. The sides of the bath are not shelves, and certainly not ones that should have fresh loo rolls balanced on instead of replacing the old one in the holder. The wooden box at the end of the bed is not a shelf... it's a container for storing our bedding. The floor is not a shelf for worn clothing.. it's a surface for walking on. The kitchen table is not a shelf for anything you can't think of a home for right now, we shouldn't have to clear everything off it before we can put a couple of plates down. The top of the wash basket is not a shelf, the lid often needs to be lifted. Those little squares that I had lying around when you moved in? I call them coasters... they are not decoration, they ARE shelves. Little tiny shelves you can put drinks on so they don't mark the furniture. We don't row about anything really but mess and clutter is the one thing we come close to on.
Why does your rule have to be THE rule? YOU DECIDED that the kitchen counter is not a space to store stuff, and is only a space to prep food. Your spouse may have decided otherwise. Why does YOUR decision have to be THE decision?
Load More Replies... A lot of these are just the OP making things a bigger deal than they are or are upset that their SO doesn't do things the exact same way they do.
That's ... exactly the point of this list.... they didn't ask for legitimate things, they asked for trivial things lol
Load More Replies... My hubby and I always fight over who has more bed and blanket lol.
Most of these are petty. Learn to love your partner even with their flaws.
The amount of people commenting "get separate bedrooms" is concerning
