Woman Gets What She Deserves After Kicking Out BF’s Cat From His House When He Wasn’t Around
What’s with some people disliking cats so much, I wonder. We previously covered a story about a woman who kicked her BF out of her flat because she overheard him talking maliciously with her furball. We also wrote about a man who got an ultimatum from his vegan girlfriend who demanded that he give away his cat. Both incidents are hard to wrap your head around and there’s another similar story from this Redditor, u/Astonished_Hound.
“My girlfriend of 2 years moved in with me a few weeks ago and it was clear she didn’t like my cat,” he wrote in a post on r/AITA. But one day he got home and his beloved 3 Y.O. furball Raven, who was not an outdoorsy cat, was gone. As you can imagine, Raven’s owner was sick to his stomach as his friend was gone for hours.
Read on for how the story evolved right below, which ends in a broken relationship and an ex-girlfriend having to move out by the end of the month.
The owner of 3 Y.O. black-furred Raven shared a story of how his girlfriend kicked the cat out of his house
Image credits: Astonished_Hound
Here are some more pics of poor Raven, who got kicked out for some reason that, for most people, is simply unthinkable
Image credits: Astonished_Hound
Image credits: Astonished_Hound
“Secondly, house pets are accustomed to having their needs met by their human parents. Asking a cat or dog (or anything else) to defend itself or hunt for food when they’ve never been taught how to do so is inhumane. There’s only so much they know from instinct,” Susan explained.
The life coach added that she wouldn’t have any problem asking this woman to leave at the end of the month. “She’s a human who can take care of herself. The cat was there first, and if the girlfriend wasn’t comfortable with it she shouldn’t have moved in in the first place. By throwing the cat out to fend for itself, the girlfriend showed a lack of compassion not only for the cat, but for the boyfriend, too. This really isn’t the kind of person you want to have a relationship with,” Susan concluded.
The takeaways from this story according to Susan are these: “Make sure the person you’re dating has similar values to yours, and don’t be afraid to communicate openly and honestly. If you can’t, then move on.”
People said that the author was definitely not an a-hole and that nothing good can come out of this relationship
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If she had given the cat a month's notice then she'd be entitled to a month's notice. Otherwise, no.
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I have a dog. She comes first. End of story and yes, she would have been out on her @$$ that very same day.
Oh boo hoo she will be homeless. So f'n what!!!! She had no problem with making this little snuggle boy homeless, so why should anyone care she will be. Also he is generous, I would have grabbed her crap and thrown it out the door with her the moment she admitted to dumping the cat.
my fiancee & I had long talks every Saturday afternoon about our upcoming marriage. The pastor gave us a marriage prep book with multiple chapters. It dealt with all the main topics that should be discussed and on the table before marriage. I thought we were both being cool-headed and upfront about all these things. Yes, pets were discussed. I had a cat who I was very attached to. She knew this. I owned my house. It was a modest 1400 s.f. (130 square meters) detached starter home with a fenced garden in a decent middle-class nice neighborhood that was only a few years old. We went through all of the chapters. I asked her if she knew who she was marrying and what she was getting into. She said "yes" and "yes". She said she didn't like cats. The compromise was that the cat would become an outdoors cat and stay in the garage. We came back from the honeymoon, and the cat had given birth to kittens. The new wife moaned that she was surrounded by cats. She said the cat was attacking her. I asked what this meant, and the reality is the cat was rubbing up to her ankles trying to make friends. She said she would not go into the garage anymore since it was contaminated. She then told me she hated cats. She slammed down the ultimatum after only three weeks' investment in the marriage that the cat and her kittens had to go. Her exact words were, "she goes or I go". I told her that I was calling her bluff and to do what she had to do. She knew I had a cat when she moved in. This was already discussed and agreed to. I told her I was not going to take my cat and her new kittens to the pound and have them put to sleep. She kept escalating with outrage until I asked for a separation. She called up her mother and said that I asked for a divorce, which was a lie. She moved out and all her stuff was gone the next day. She cleaned out the bank account. She expected me to crumble to her majesty's demands on threat and ultimatum of divorce. She would not talk to me on the phone, so I sent her a letter detailing the 50 or so similar incidents where she had been equally unbelievably obnoxious and unreasonable. I suggested we go together to counseling. She filed that day after getting the letter. Then she proceeded to destroy my reputation among our friends. Talk about the marriage from hell!!! I still did not crumble, so she divorced me. She ruined my life and reputation and could not understand why I did not come over and beg her majesty's forgiveness and to return on her sovereign terms. It has been 35 years, and I still haven't got over it. What a jerk! My best understanding from talking to psychologists and marriage counselors after this was that she was a borderline psychotic in deep denial. The stress of leaving her precious "toxic co-dependent" mommy and comfortable cradle of a home pushed her over the edge. What a nightmare! You never know who you are marrying until after you marry them. Why me, Lord?
What a miserable piece of trash. I hope horrible things happened in her life.
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NTA. This is disgusting. I had to leave an abusive ex with my newborn daughter in tow... I wasn't able to get my cat out fast enough; my ex made it clear I would have to sue him to get him back "bc he loved him and needed him"... before I could file the paperwork proving ownership, he threw him on the street (fully indoor cat) so he could be hit by a car. So disgusting and unforgivable! It takes a true psychopath to intentionally hurt an animal out of revenge for their own garbage behavior!!!
That's terrible. My ex made it look like he had murdered and skinned my cat. When I got home he had a spotlight shining on the kitchen table where he had staged a rabbit fur that looked exactly like my cat. So disturbing. I was able to get mine out and run.
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End of the month? I would not spend one more day with this person, so "Out!" it is - the same day. She can stay with family, friends, or at a youth hostel, I don't care...
New boyfriend came to the apartment, saw the cat and said, "It'll have to go." Ex-boyfriend left a few minutes later.
As someone with an amazing black cat I absolutely love the he chose the cat over her. Also his cat is f*****g adorable ❤️
NTA...i recently moved to an apartment with all my pets..the neighbors complained about it..now i was given an option to move out or adopt my cats away...i decided to move out...aint nobody gonna take away my family from me..one of them is a black cat i found on my doorstep...she and her brother are super sweet...and i couldnt bear the thought of letting them go...so they are coming with me wherever whenever...no bf or gf of mine will kick my cats out...luckily my current gf is looking forward to meeting all of them :)
I wouldn’t have waited until the end of the month since I’d be afraid she’d hurt the cat again out of spite. I’d also call her ex girlfriend. Too many red flags
The cat was staying with someone else until she moved out. She sounds deceitful, too. She knew about the cat, but didn't show how much she hated Raven until she moved in.
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that poor cat could've been killed. i had a black cat that was killed by my neighbor because he said it was in slef defense. how the hell are you in self defence to a one yr old cat
In Greece, the fine for killing an animal is 30,000 Euros, ever since the new law was passed (last year) and it has been enforced many many times. Now, self defence against a cat... I mean what was it? The Month Python killer bunny???
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So she was okay with the cat living on the street but not her??? She can at least take care of herself, a trained indoor cat CANT
Throw out my cat and you can consider yourself lucky if you're able to leave the house in one piece. Also, you will desperately try to fnd her and bring her back into the safe inside that is her world, where nothing but love, rubs and treats are to be given to her. And afterwards - fuggyaself, leave, do not dare to return, unless you don't like having your head attached to your neck...
A pet is just one step below a child in a list of priorities and responsibilities. You don't ask your partner to kick out his/her kids out once you move in and same is with the pets. You either take the whole package or none.
Hurt my pet and I will hurt you without regard for my own safety. And I might not stop if you harmed them badly enough.
That's the moment you grab your now-ex girlfriend by the scurf of her neck and throw her out, on the street, on her f***y. Good riddance.
BP censors "f***y"?! Not surprised. You can "edit", change a letter to cap/special, or misspell. And yes!!!
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It is totally fine if you don't like pets or children or whatever, but then don't date (or move in with ffs!!!) people who have them. Don't expect people to totally change who they are for you, seriously!
I would have been beyond livid! I have one cat and she is absolutely my best friend. I would like to believe that if I were seeing someone who had an aversion to cats that I would be observant enough to pick up on this. However, many people are very talented at hiding the truth of their thoughts and feelings. Were I to come home and discover my cat had been purposely escorted from the house then the person responsible would receive the very same treatment on the spot! My cat will always love me unconditionally and clearly anyone who is willing to pull a stunt like this, will not!
Why even let her move in in the first place? She sounds like a selfish, uncaring twat who didn’t give a f**k about another living being, or about the bf’s feelings. Thank goodness he found out before they had children together, or bought a plant.
New boyfriend came to the apartment, saw my cat (of many years) and said, "It'll have to go." Ex-boyfriend left shortly thereafter.
soooo NTA! she's lucky you gave her until the end of the month as i would have had her packed out that very day. don't have any where to stay? well, not being completely heartless, i would have booked one night at the sleaziest motel in order for her to have at least a few hours to come up with a plan.
Unless the end of the month was within the next hour then you were waaaaay to lenient. But yeah, she gotta go.
He was incredibly nice to let her stay a month. I would have made her leave that day! The cat could have been hit by a car, gotten into a fight with another animal, eaten something harmful, etc. while he was outdoors. She was mean, selfish and abusive to both her boyfriend and Raven. If she dated him for two years, she must have known he had a cat and that he and the cat had a bond. I've had my cats for 14 years and 12 years. I'd never let anyone make me gat rid of them. They are indoor cats. I'd be furious if anyone put them outside!!! I had a black cat for 19 years. I loved him - Raven reminds me of him.
NTA. Your cat is a member of your family, and at 36 with no man in my life, my cats are likely going to be my "children". Only true animal lovers know that your animal isn't "just a cat", it's your loved one, family member, something you cannot live without and would be heartbroken at its loss. Either she sees no value in animals (i NEVER trust those people), or she knew how much the cat meant to you but didn't care. Either way, get rid of her. This is unforgiveable. He could have been hit by a car, torn apart by a neighborhood dog, abused by horrible humans, or could have picked up diseases/ticks/fleas costing you in vets bills. Ditch her and find a fellow feline lover who will spoil and love your furball the same way you do - or more! Good luck.
She would have been OUT right away if that were my pet and my situation. I have been in that position. An ex threatened to "lose" my cat somewhere if I didn't declawed him. He is an ex, for a reason. My kitty lived to 18½ years old and happy with a sister cat, sister dog, brother dog - all rescues, and my loving husband who adores animals, too.
Her stuff would be out on the street the minute she admitted to kicking my cat out. You don't need someone as heartless as that to stick around.
I surprised you weren't aware of her feelings towards your lovely cat prior to moving in together. If my husband didn't love cats he wouldn't be my husband.
She knew about the cat, hadn't said anything against Raven. My husband didn't understand why I would have a pet rabbit. The difference between the two is that one was dishonest and selfish and the other wasn't.
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I went on a first date with a young man whom I had know casually for quite a while. Somehow, pets had never come up. I invited him in after our date, for a cup of coffee (yes, really), and he saw my cat. He snarled, in that hateful voice that actual cat-haters always use, "I HATE f'ing cats." I looked him dead in the eyes and said, "She was here before you came along, and she'll be here when you are long gone. I had a lovely evening, and you have a nice life.
Dated a very nice man a couple of times he was great but admitted he was allergic to cats and didnt like my dog in the house . Suddenly he wasnt so great . My 2 cats are indoor only dog in And out as she pleases . He couldn't understand why i put my pets first . Oh well nice knowing you goodbye.
The generosity of this guy giving her a months notice?! Sod that, out on her ear the minute she confessed. I honestly can't imagine how people can behave this way with other living creatures??! Woman probably has no soul herself! My husband & I have a feline family member who we love to death, but if I was single and anyone i dated had an issue with him or cats generally - they'd be GONE without hesitation.
She would get exactly 3 words from me... " Get. Out. NOW." my furry boys /are/ my children ( since I can't have biological ones) and by the gods, I take care of them as such. ( when looking for housing, I was told I would have to either declaw or give them up. Apparently asking the person to do the same in return to one of their biological offspring is ' monstrous' and ' not socially acceptable' )
I would say this isn't even about the cat. She knew that he would be devastated, and she did it anyway. That's not okay.
Hey ya know what at least he found out b4 he married her..... Some people are so....... I don't even know what the word is ... Most cats jst lay around, chase things, and want to be loved. Even if u don't like them jst ignore it... I had my son (cat) for almost 19yrs b4 he passed away. Let me tell you Mr. bubbs came first b4 any woman. He was always there for me loved me unconditionally, and never hurt me, (few scratches 😉) R.I.P. will never forget ya Mr bubbs😞😞
Please accept my deepest condolences on the passing of your dear sweet Mr. Bubbs 😭😿
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I would have kicked her ass out that second. I'd have been like "your s**t will be on the porch in the morning".
He made the right choice. The cat was there first. I know someone who made the wrong choice. She adopted a cat, and then met a man who owned a dog. He eventually moved in with her. He made her give up the cat, while he got to keep his dog. That cat now lives with me. Her name is Cookie.
I couldn't imagine giving her a month to get out. I would have given her an hour. How could anyone thing that is alright? Honestly, I would pick my dog over anyone any day of the week. He means more to me than any other living thing so I am 100% behind this man and his choice. The strongest emotional bonds I have ever had have been between me and my pets, they come first and more than that, they rely on me. A grown adult can look after themselves.
You gave her a month??? She would have been out the door in seconds if it were me! The window if it was closer!
NTA AT ALL! As an owner of 3 cats and have owned cats for 15 years, my SO would have five minutes to pack and leave. Thankfully, my bf has grown to love my cats and their personalities. So much that now he has two of his own!
Btw What a sweet cat Raven is! I have two black kitties and a Calico
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I hope she is NOT his girlfriend any more..... for good, not taking her back.
When you told her to move out and she said I have no place to go I will be living in the streets, You should have said to her now you will k ow what's it's like being a cat with no home or shelter from the cold. Cat people should always be with other cat people. I also have a cat that a friend of mine found out in the street crying he was only 2.monshs old he is truly the love of my life, I have had two other cats that I adopted but they have long past away. 😸
If it was me, she would be dragged outside by her feet that very moment and thrown in the trash. My cat is my literal baby. We are inseperatable. The day she dies, part of my soul and heart will die with her.
When my cousin got married, her husband had a dog. She dislikes dogs and didn’t want one. She cared for it for seven years (her husband had to do the majority of the poop scooping) until it died of natural causes because he loved it and it was a helpless animal. They never got another one. That’s how decent people behave.
I've always made it crystal clear to whom ever I'm dating my main priorities: 1. My family, 2. My Wellbeing, 3. My home/property, & 4. My Career. My dogs are my children and they fall into the family category and until you prove yourself to deserve to be part of my family they will always come first. So if you can't handle that keep it moving.
I'd kick her then kick her out of the house. Don't mess with my master,you damn pest!
Curious to know how the girlfriend behaved with the cat in the two years before she moved in.
NTA. Your cat takes priority over any human, PERIOD. Kick that B*tch to the curb where she belongs. She almost made your cat homeless and DEAD, so now she DESERVES to be made homeless herself. You already are being too nice by giving her until the end of the month. She should be out that same day.
I don't have to say not the asshole because duh but I have SO MANY BLOODY QUESTIONS!
My cat was afraid of men because of my x. (That asshole would do things like get jealous of my cat sleeping on my boobs and throw him! That was just the tip of the psycho iceburg.) I remarried when i met a man my fearful cat would sleep in the lap of. Married 13 years and my "new" hubby is still the most wonderful person I have ever met and i love him dearly. ^_^
On a side note, my good hubby also had a cat when we met. She never had to share her human before and would just glare at me. It was a long distance relationship, so when i came over i wound up staying in his sister's old room. She had left some items on the shelf above the pillows of the bed. I woke up to a sound near my head. Then a glass candle votive narrowly missed my head. Then i heard a scooting noise and realized a porcaline cookie jar in the shape of a milk cow was slowly scooting out above my head. I turned the light on and it was his cat scooting things off the shelf above my head! Long story short, his cat decided after a year of me giving her treats an pets that i make an adequate human slave. XD She slept on me more than him after a while.
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My ex man friend told me, in order for our relationship to move forward "You need to get rid of your dog, get rid of your cat and put that bird of yours in a little cage. I told him if I "Got rid of my pets I would no longer be happy." I said my parrot is 25 y. o. and had all of his feathers because he had all kinds of enrichment, a proper diet and plenty of love. My animals mean everything to me. We are now only friends.
When I started dating my husband (then boyfriend) he came over and was like 'Oh I am allergic to cats.' I told him my kitty boy was around way before him and he sleeps in my bed, boyfriend could share or just not sleep in my bed. He shared, took allergy meds and LOVED MY kitty boy. Which is why he is my now husband. :D What this woman did is HORRID and shows a lack of empathy which is the biggest red flag anyone could have. You don't like animals, GTF out with that.
1,000,000,000 percent NTA! There is not a single person on this planet that I would get rid of my cats for. For her to throw him out? WTF! Good riddance
K would not have waited to throw her out........it would have been immediately so as to not give her time to pull another stunt like this before the end of the month.
NTA She should have been kicked out the same day like she did to poor Raven. So glad that your buddy found and recognized her to bring her home.
NOT the A.H.!! I'm not especially fond of cats but were that women my roomie etc, she'd be OUTTA THERE PRONTO!! That's cruelty to let the cat "get out"! Bad GF, BAD, BAD GF!!
you are out. That day. That minute. Out. nobody will hurt my pets i lived on the strreet when i was a kid and now im welthy but how could a little cat become safe and sound she should go to hell
oh boo-hoo she kicked out a defenseless cat on the streets and now she will feel how it feels to be defenselesson the streets with no food r water and cold hungry. she has a right to be on the street for kicking out a little fur ball that is hungry and that has not even layed a furry paw on the outside world she just left him out there to die in to be defenseless he never even known other defenses self because he's just a little baby
Very much NTA! The ex-gf is 100% TA. I can't stand people like her who think the world should revolve around them. And definitely can't stand people who are mean to animals. I understand not everyone likes them, but that doesn't give anyone the right to mistreat them. If anyone ever hurt my cat or kicked him out like this, I'd have a hard time not physically attacking that person. And I'm glad it seems like 99% of people here agree! Bored pandas love animals
I wouldn't have given a one month. Why should I have to be without my pet while you take your sweet time to figure it out. I agree with the coach, however this isn't television we aren't going to get the 411 on what they have and haven't discussed. Maybe they did discuss the cat before moving in together. But maybe she's just a horrible person who didn't wanna take "no" for an answer. There is A LOT of that surprisingly.
when a relationship starts like this it will not be good. she has no respect for you OR for living creatures. considers her comforts of more importance. I know a hoarder and I would not dare throw away ANYTHING. even a scrap of paper and he would not allow me to. you are better off!
I wouldn't have been nice enough to give her till the end of the month. She would have been out as soon as my fur baby got home.
Pack her things and leave her at the door step. Kick her out like she kicked out that majestic cutie pie
My kitten escaped out the house on Friday and got knocked over. My daughter has been crying since; how could she put the poor baby out.
I would have kicked her out on the spot, And thrown out all her belongings into the street, She is obviously VERY bad news!
If it was me, I'd have called a locksmith right on the spot, then informed the now EX-Girlfriend that she had until the locksmith finished changing all the locks to have her and her crapola out of my life. Anything not removed by that time would start accruing storage charges and she would have to make an appointment, at my convenience not hers, to remove the rest of her junk. As to her lament about having to live on the street, that's exactly what she expected the cat to do.
She was a pice of s**t and doesn't deserve to live! I'm glad he dumped her ass. I'm also glad his furbaby was found and back with his dad.
You were actually generous not to have asked her to leave in the next hour. She pose a serious dangerous to Raven. By the way, I have two black cats, siblings. They were rescued and I can see some patch marks in Raven's fur. This is stress, related maybe to when he was kicked out or changes in the environment (with her moving in). My cats had the same marks (licking fur too much to a point to leave marks) and it was solved using Feliway. The way we plug in the power outlet. It's just pheromones and it helps a lot. Hope it helps Raven to decompress after the stress.
You gave her till the end of the month, sorry she would have been on the street in 30 mins or less. as for where will she go, hey they have shelters for dumb buggers like her. I would also file a police report of animal cruelty and get her prosecuted.
BRAVO she does not deserve an animal loving guy like you. She did that to my dogs and cats let us say I have a back hoe and 100 acres.
If your girlfriend had time to move in and get comfy enough to oust your cat (who was there first), I think giving her until the end if the day to get her trifling a** out is being more than generous!
This is awful! My dad doesn't like cats either, but the worst thing he's ever done to my mom's cat is throw balled up paper napkins at him (which the cat just ends up tossing around like a toy).
I really want an update to this post, to know she was kicked out... Throw her onto the cold sidewalk for at least several hours, see how she likes it. Animals are great and inherently good. People suck. Especially people who are mean to animals.
Im sorry but if my girlfriend had a problem with my pets (Which she doesn't she loves them to death.) And she pulled some crap like this i would given her two weeks to move out. My pets come first, They have been with me WAYYYYYYYYYY longer than she has. Long story short. Hes NTA
Nta she should've been out the next day. I don't care how badly you hate any animal you do not throw them out to fend for themselves. She's a grown up she would've figured it out no matter if she did end up homeless.
Definitely nta. I'm allergic to cats so if I dated someone with one it would likely be a discussion, but I would never take it upon myself to get rid of someone's cat. I don't even like the idea of getting rid of someone else's stuff.
I understand how some people can be superstitious of black cats but he looks like a real love bug and I don't understand how somebody could just leave a poor defenseless animal out on the street to Bedford self those are the worst kind of people and have a special place in hell for when they get there
I wouldn't even date let alone live with someone who hates animals. Let alone harms any animal, and my cats especially.
She was thrown out instead of killed? She should consider herself lucky.
I'm gonna go with YTA for having such poor judgement when it comes to your partner. NTA for kicking her out. Just for getting her there in the first place.
That’s a deal breaker for me. I’d have kicked her out that day. I hope the cat came back
NTA! I wouldn't give her more than 24 hrs. This makes me sick! Poor kitty :(
You touch or treat my cat with no respect you are out of my life. Massive red flag, she lucky she's got till the end of the month, I'd turf her and her stuff out immediately
NTA for getting rid of her. Moron for letting her move in in the first place knowing she didn't like the cat. Wasted your and cat's time. P.S. I would have said end of day, not month.
A month is way too long. She deserves to be out right now. I think he needs to get her out before she has a chance to play mind games and convince him that it was a mistake and she is sorry. I am not saying that will happen, but some people do crazy things to get their way.
One of the signs for emerging psychopaths is killing/torturing animals, I would be wary!
So she'll kick the cat out with nowhere to go.... but then has the audacity to complain about the same s**t when she can work, get her own place and feed herself? Nah. F**k that bitch. She's gotta go.
When I moved in with my now wife, she had an alley cat that I wasn't fond of. Of course, he thought I was the bees knees and inside a week we were snuggling together and we were best buddies. Micio was with us for over 10 years and we still have his ashes on our mantle, almost 30 years later. Now you look at my pets sideways and I'll kick your ass on principle.
I had always had cats. Boyfriend had always had dogs. We were both without pets. My husband died after only 356 days married, and my cat died eight months later at age 18. I got a new man before I could bring myself to get another baby. He said let's expand the family. He wanted a puppy. I was willing, but it was January in Pennsylvania. I said, "That puppy's going to need to go out at night..." and he said "Let's get a kitten." And we did. When we took Buster to get him neutered, BF said to the nurse "I thought I was a dog man, but this cat changed my life.". We didn't stop we Buster. We grew the family more with Bose, Spec, and Lloyd. He is the best cat dad ever!
You can't diagnose mental illness over the internet.
Load More Replies... "Don't harm something I love" is usually understood as a boundary without being spoken.
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If she had given the cat a month's notice then she'd be entitled to a month's notice. Otherwise, no.
Load More Replies... I have a dog. She comes first. End of story and yes, she would have been out on her @$$ that very same day.
Oh boo hoo she will be homeless. So f'n what!!!! She had no problem with making this little snuggle boy homeless, so why should anyone care she will be. Also he is generous, I would have grabbed her crap and thrown it out the door with her the moment she admitted to dumping the cat.
my fiancee & I had long talks every Saturday afternoon about our upcoming marriage. The pastor gave us a marriage prep book with multiple chapters. It dealt with all the main topics that should be discussed and on the table before marriage. I thought we were both being cool-headed and upfront about all these things. Yes, pets were discussed. I had a cat who I was very attached to. She knew this. I owned my house. It was a modest 1400 s.f. (130 square meters) detached starter home with a fenced garden in a decent middle-class nice neighborhood that was only a few years old. We went through all of the chapters. I asked her if she knew who she was marrying and what she was getting into. She said "yes" and "yes". She said she didn't like cats. The compromise was that the cat would become an outdoors cat and stay in the garage. We came back from the honeymoon, and the cat had given birth to kittens. The new wife moaned that she was surrounded by cats. She said the cat was attacking her. I asked what this meant, and the reality is the cat was rubbing up to her ankles trying to make friends. She said she would not go into the garage anymore since it was contaminated. She then told me she hated cats. She slammed down the ultimatum after only three weeks' investment in the marriage that the cat and her kittens had to go. Her exact words were, "she goes or I go". I told her that I was calling her bluff and to do what she had to do. She knew I had a cat when she moved in. This was already discussed and agreed to. I told her I was not going to take my cat and her new kittens to the pound and have them put to sleep. She kept escalating with outrage until I asked for a separation. She called up her mother and said that I asked for a divorce, which was a lie. She moved out and all her stuff was gone the next day. She cleaned out the bank account. She expected me to crumble to her majesty's demands on threat and ultimatum of divorce. She would not talk to me on the phone, so I sent her a letter detailing the 50 or so similar incidents where she had been equally unbelievably obnoxious and unreasonable. I suggested we go together to counseling. She filed that day after getting the letter. Then she proceeded to destroy my reputation among our friends. Talk about the marriage from hell!!! I still did not crumble, so she divorced me. She ruined my life and reputation and could not understand why I did not come over and beg her majesty's forgiveness and to return on her sovereign terms. It has been 35 years, and I still haven't got over it. What a jerk! My best understanding from talking to psychologists and marriage counselors after this was that she was a borderline psychotic in deep denial. The stress of leaving her precious "toxic co-dependent" mommy and comfortable cradle of a home pushed her over the edge. What a nightmare! You never know who you are marrying until after you marry them. Why me, Lord?
What a miserable piece of trash. I hope horrible things happened in her life.
Load More Replies... NTA. This is disgusting. I had to leave an abusive ex with my newborn daughter in tow... I wasn't able to get my cat out fast enough; my ex made it clear I would have to sue him to get him back "bc he loved him and needed him"... before I could file the paperwork proving ownership, he threw him on the street (fully indoor cat) so he could be hit by a car. So disgusting and unforgivable! It takes a true psychopath to intentionally hurt an animal out of revenge for their own garbage behavior!!!
That's terrible. My ex made it look like he had murdered and skinned my cat. When I got home he had a spotlight shining on the kitchen table where he had staged a rabbit fur that looked exactly like my cat. So disturbing. I was able to get mine out and run.
Load More Replies... End of the month? I would not spend one more day with this person, so "Out!" it is - the same day. She can stay with family, friends, or at a youth hostel, I don't care...
New boyfriend came to the apartment, saw the cat and said, "It'll have to go." Ex-boyfriend left a few minutes later.
As someone with an amazing black cat I absolutely love the he chose the cat over her. Also his cat is f*****g adorable ❤️
NTA...i recently moved to an apartment with all my pets..the neighbors complained about it..now i was given an option to move out or adopt my cats away...i decided to move out...aint nobody gonna take away my family from me..one of them is a black cat i found on my doorstep...she and her brother are super sweet...and i couldnt bear the thought of letting them go...so they are coming with me wherever whenever...no bf or gf of mine will kick my cats out...luckily my current gf is looking forward to meeting all of them :)
I wouldn’t have waited until the end of the month since I’d be afraid she’d hurt the cat again out of spite. I’d also call her ex girlfriend. Too many red flags
The cat was staying with someone else until she moved out. She sounds deceitful, too. She knew about the cat, but didn't show how much she hated Raven until she moved in.
Load More Replies... that poor cat could've been killed. i had a black cat that was killed by my neighbor because he said it was in slef defense. how the hell are you in self defence to a one yr old cat
In Greece, the fine for killing an animal is 30,000 Euros, ever since the new law was passed (last year) and it has been enforced many many times. Now, self defence against a cat... I mean what was it? The Month Python killer bunny???
Load More Replies... So she was okay with the cat living on the street but not her??? She can at least take care of herself, a trained indoor cat CANT
Throw out my cat and you can consider yourself lucky if you're able to leave the house in one piece. Also, you will desperately try to fnd her and bring her back into the safe inside that is her world, where nothing but love, rubs and treats are to be given to her. And afterwards - fuggyaself, leave, do not dare to return, unless you don't like having your head attached to your neck...
A pet is just one step below a child in a list of priorities and responsibilities. You don't ask your partner to kick out his/her kids out once you move in and same is with the pets. You either take the whole package or none.
Hurt my pet and I will hurt you without regard for my own safety. And I might not stop if you harmed them badly enough.
That's the moment you grab your now-ex girlfriend by the scurf of her neck and throw her out, on the street, on her f***y. Good riddance.
BP censors "f***y"?! Not surprised. You can "edit", change a letter to cap/special, or misspell. And yes!!!
Load More Replies... It is totally fine if you don't like pets or children or whatever, but then don't date (or move in with ffs!!!) people who have them. Don't expect people to totally change who they are for you, seriously!
I would have been beyond livid! I have one cat and she is absolutely my best friend. I would like to believe that if I were seeing someone who had an aversion to cats that I would be observant enough to pick up on this. However, many people are very talented at hiding the truth of their thoughts and feelings. Were I to come home and discover my cat had been purposely escorted from the house then the person responsible would receive the very same treatment on the spot! My cat will always love me unconditionally and clearly anyone who is willing to pull a stunt like this, will not!
Why even let her move in in the first place? She sounds like a selfish, uncaring twat who didn’t give a f**k about another living being, or about the bf’s feelings. Thank goodness he found out before they had children together, or bought a plant.
New boyfriend came to the apartment, saw my cat (of many years) and said, "It'll have to go." Ex-boyfriend left shortly thereafter.
soooo NTA! she's lucky you gave her until the end of the month as i would have had her packed out that very day. don't have any where to stay? well, not being completely heartless, i would have booked one night at the sleaziest motel in order for her to have at least a few hours to come up with a plan.
Unless the end of the month was within the next hour then you were waaaaay to lenient. But yeah, she gotta go.
He was incredibly nice to let her stay a month. I would have made her leave that day! The cat could have been hit by a car, gotten into a fight with another animal, eaten something harmful, etc. while he was outdoors. She was mean, selfish and abusive to both her boyfriend and Raven. If she dated him for two years, she must have known he had a cat and that he and the cat had a bond. I've had my cats for 14 years and 12 years. I'd never let anyone make me gat rid of them. They are indoor cats. I'd be furious if anyone put them outside!!! I had a black cat for 19 years. I loved him - Raven reminds me of him.
NTA. Your cat is a member of your family, and at 36 with no man in my life, my cats are likely going to be my "children". Only true animal lovers know that your animal isn't "just a cat", it's your loved one, family member, something you cannot live without and would be heartbroken at its loss. Either she sees no value in animals (i NEVER trust those people), or she knew how much the cat meant to you but didn't care. Either way, get rid of her. This is unforgiveable. He could have been hit by a car, torn apart by a neighborhood dog, abused by horrible humans, or could have picked up diseases/ticks/fleas costing you in vets bills. Ditch her and find a fellow feline lover who will spoil and love your furball the same way you do - or more! Good luck.
She would have been OUT right away if that were my pet and my situation. I have been in that position. An ex threatened to "lose" my cat somewhere if I didn't declawed him. He is an ex, for a reason. My kitty lived to 18½ years old and happy with a sister cat, sister dog, brother dog - all rescues, and my loving husband who adores animals, too.
Her stuff would be out on the street the minute she admitted to kicking my cat out. You don't need someone as heartless as that to stick around.
I surprised you weren't aware of her feelings towards your lovely cat prior to moving in together. If my husband didn't love cats he wouldn't be my husband.
She knew about the cat, hadn't said anything against Raven. My husband didn't understand why I would have a pet rabbit. The difference between the two is that one was dishonest and selfish and the other wasn't.
Load More Replies... I went on a first date with a young man whom I had know casually for quite a while. Somehow, pets had never come up. I invited him in after our date, for a cup of coffee (yes, really), and he saw my cat. He snarled, in that hateful voice that actual cat-haters always use, "I HATE f'ing cats." I looked him dead in the eyes and said, "She was here before you came along, and she'll be here when you are long gone. I had a lovely evening, and you have a nice life.
Dated a very nice man a couple of times he was great but admitted he was allergic to cats and didnt like my dog in the house . Suddenly he wasnt so great . My 2 cats are indoor only dog in And out as she pleases . He couldn't understand why i put my pets first . Oh well nice knowing you goodbye.
The generosity of this guy giving her a months notice?! Sod that, out on her ear the minute she confessed. I honestly can't imagine how people can behave this way with other living creatures??! Woman probably has no soul herself! My husband & I have a feline family member who we love to death, but if I was single and anyone i dated had an issue with him or cats generally - they'd be GONE without hesitation.
She would get exactly 3 words from me... " Get. Out. NOW." my furry boys /are/ my children ( since I can't have biological ones) and by the gods, I take care of them as such. ( when looking for housing, I was told I would have to either declaw or give them up. Apparently asking the person to do the same in return to one of their biological offspring is ' monstrous' and ' not socially acceptable' )
I would say this isn't even about the cat. She knew that he would be devastated, and she did it anyway. That's not okay.
Hey ya know what at least he found out b4 he married her..... Some people are so....... I don't even know what the word is ... Most cats jst lay around, chase things, and want to be loved. Even if u don't like them jst ignore it... I had my son (cat) for almost 19yrs b4 he passed away. Let me tell you Mr. bubbs came first b4 any woman. He was always there for me loved me unconditionally, and never hurt me, (few scratches 😉) R.I.P. will never forget ya Mr bubbs😞😞
Please accept my deepest condolences on the passing of your dear sweet Mr. Bubbs 😭😿
Load More Replies... I would have kicked her ass out that second. I'd have been like "your s**t will be on the porch in the morning".
He made the right choice. The cat was there first. I know someone who made the wrong choice. She adopted a cat, and then met a man who owned a dog. He eventually moved in with her. He made her give up the cat, while he got to keep his dog. That cat now lives with me. Her name is Cookie.
I couldn't imagine giving her a month to get out. I would have given her an hour. How could anyone thing that is alright? Honestly, I would pick my dog over anyone any day of the week. He means more to me than any other living thing so I am 100% behind this man and his choice. The strongest emotional bonds I have ever had have been between me and my pets, they come first and more than that, they rely on me. A grown adult can look after themselves.
You gave her a month??? She would have been out the door in seconds if it were me! The window if it was closer!
NTA AT ALL! As an owner of 3 cats and have owned cats for 15 years, my SO would have five minutes to pack and leave. Thankfully, my bf has grown to love my cats and their personalities. So much that now he has two of his own!
Btw What a sweet cat Raven is! I have two black kitties and a Calico
Load More Replies... I hope she is NOT his girlfriend any more..... for good, not taking her back.
When you told her to move out and she said I have no place to go I will be living in the streets, You should have said to her now you will k ow what's it's like being a cat with no home or shelter from the cold. Cat people should always be with other cat people. I also have a cat that a friend of mine found out in the street crying he was only 2.monshs old he is truly the love of my life, I have had two other cats that I adopted but they have long past away. 😸
If it was me, she would be dragged outside by her feet that very moment and thrown in the trash. My cat is my literal baby. We are inseperatable. The day she dies, part of my soul and heart will die with her.
When my cousin got married, her husband had a dog. She dislikes dogs and didn’t want one. She cared for it for seven years (her husband had to do the majority of the poop scooping) until it died of natural causes because he loved it and it was a helpless animal. They never got another one. That’s how decent people behave.
I've always made it crystal clear to whom ever I'm dating my main priorities: 1. My family, 2. My Wellbeing, 3. My home/property, & 4. My Career. My dogs are my children and they fall into the family category and until you prove yourself to deserve to be part of my family they will always come first. So if you can't handle that keep it moving.
I'd kick her then kick her out of the house. Don't mess with my master,you damn pest!
Curious to know how the girlfriend behaved with the cat in the two years before she moved in.
NTA. Your cat takes priority over any human, PERIOD. Kick that B*tch to the curb where she belongs. She almost made your cat homeless and DEAD, so now she DESERVES to be made homeless herself. You already are being too nice by giving her until the end of the month. She should be out that same day.
I don't have to say not the asshole because duh but I have SO MANY BLOODY QUESTIONS!
My cat was afraid of men because of my x. (That asshole would do things like get jealous of my cat sleeping on my boobs and throw him! That was just the tip of the psycho iceburg.) I remarried when i met a man my fearful cat would sleep in the lap of. Married 13 years and my "new" hubby is still the most wonderful person I have ever met and i love him dearly. ^_^
On a side note, my good hubby also had a cat when we met. She never had to share her human before and would just glare at me. It was a long distance relationship, so when i came over i wound up staying in his sister's old room. She had left some items on the shelf above the pillows of the bed. I woke up to a sound near my head. Then a glass candle votive narrowly missed my head. Then i heard a scooting noise and realized a porcaline cookie jar in the shape of a milk cow was slowly scooting out above my head. I turned the light on and it was his cat scooting things off the shelf above my head! Long story short, his cat decided after a year of me giving her treats an pets that i make an adequate human slave. XD She slept on me more than him after a while.
Load More Replies... My ex man friend told me, in order for our relationship to move forward "You need to get rid of your dog, get rid of your cat and put that bird of yours in a little cage. I told him if I "Got rid of my pets I would no longer be happy." I said my parrot is 25 y. o. and had all of his feathers because he had all kinds of enrichment, a proper diet and plenty of love. My animals mean everything to me. We are now only friends.
When I started dating my husband (then boyfriend) he came over and was like 'Oh I am allergic to cats.' I told him my kitty boy was around way before him and he sleeps in my bed, boyfriend could share or just not sleep in my bed. He shared, took allergy meds and LOVED MY kitty boy. Which is why he is my now husband. :D What this woman did is HORRID and shows a lack of empathy which is the biggest red flag anyone could have. You don't like animals, GTF out with that.
1,000,000,000 percent NTA! There is not a single person on this planet that I would get rid of my cats for. For her to throw him out? WTF! Good riddance
K would not have waited to throw her out........it would have been immediately so as to not give her time to pull another stunt like this before the end of the month.
NTA She should have been kicked out the same day like she did to poor Raven. So glad that your buddy found and recognized her to bring her home.
NOT the A.H.!! I'm not especially fond of cats but were that women my roomie etc, she'd be OUTTA THERE PRONTO!! That's cruelty to let the cat "get out"! Bad GF, BAD, BAD GF!!
you are out. That day. That minute. Out. nobody will hurt my pets i lived on the strreet when i was a kid and now im welthy but how could a little cat become safe and sound she should go to hell
oh boo-hoo she kicked out a defenseless cat on the streets and now she will feel how it feels to be defenselesson the streets with no food r water and cold hungry. she has a right to be on the street for kicking out a little fur ball that is hungry and that has not even layed a furry paw on the outside world she just left him out there to die in to be defenseless he never even known other defenses self because he's just a little baby
Very much NTA! The ex-gf is 100% TA. I can't stand people like her who think the world should revolve around them. And definitely can't stand people who are mean to animals. I understand not everyone likes them, but that doesn't give anyone the right to mistreat them. If anyone ever hurt my cat or kicked him out like this, I'd have a hard time not physically attacking that person. And I'm glad it seems like 99% of people here agree! Bored pandas love animals
I wouldn't have given a one month. Why should I have to be without my pet while you take your sweet time to figure it out. I agree with the coach, however this isn't television we aren't going to get the 411 on what they have and haven't discussed. Maybe they did discuss the cat before moving in together. But maybe she's just a horrible person who didn't wanna take "no" for an answer. There is A LOT of that surprisingly.
when a relationship starts like this it will not be good. she has no respect for you OR for living creatures. considers her comforts of more importance. I know a hoarder and I would not dare throw away ANYTHING. even a scrap of paper and he would not allow me to. you are better off!
I wouldn't have been nice enough to give her till the end of the month. She would have been out as soon as my fur baby got home.
Pack her things and leave her at the door step. Kick her out like she kicked out that majestic cutie pie
My kitten escaped out the house on Friday and got knocked over. My daughter has been crying since; how could she put the poor baby out.
I would have kicked her out on the spot, And thrown out all her belongings into the street, She is obviously VERY bad news!
If it was me, I'd have called a locksmith right on the spot, then informed the now EX-Girlfriend that she had until the locksmith finished changing all the locks to have her and her crapola out of my life. Anything not removed by that time would start accruing storage charges and she would have to make an appointment, at my convenience not hers, to remove the rest of her junk. As to her lament about having to live on the street, that's exactly what she expected the cat to do.
She was a pice of s**t and doesn't deserve to live! I'm glad he dumped her ass. I'm also glad his furbaby was found and back with his dad.
You were actually generous not to have asked her to leave in the next hour. She pose a serious dangerous to Raven. By the way, I have two black cats, siblings. They were rescued and I can see some patch marks in Raven's fur. This is stress, related maybe to when he was kicked out or changes in the environment (with her moving in). My cats had the same marks (licking fur too much to a point to leave marks) and it was solved using Feliway. The way we plug in the power outlet. It's just pheromones and it helps a lot. Hope it helps Raven to decompress after the stress.
You gave her till the end of the month, sorry she would have been on the street in 30 mins or less. as for where will she go, hey they have shelters for dumb buggers like her. I would also file a police report of animal cruelty and get her prosecuted.
BRAVO she does not deserve an animal loving guy like you. She did that to my dogs and cats let us say I have a back hoe and 100 acres.
If your girlfriend had time to move in and get comfy enough to oust your cat (who was there first), I think giving her until the end if the day to get her trifling a** out is being more than generous!
This is awful! My dad doesn't like cats either, but the worst thing he's ever done to my mom's cat is throw balled up paper napkins at him (which the cat just ends up tossing around like a toy).
I really want an update to this post, to know she was kicked out... Throw her onto the cold sidewalk for at least several hours, see how she likes it. Animals are great and inherently good. People suck. Especially people who are mean to animals.
Im sorry but if my girlfriend had a problem with my pets (Which she doesn't she loves them to death.) And she pulled some crap like this i would given her two weeks to move out. My pets come first, They have been with me WAYYYYYYYYYY longer than she has. Long story short. Hes NTA
Nta she should've been out the next day. I don't care how badly you hate any animal you do not throw them out to fend for themselves. She's a grown up she would've figured it out no matter if she did end up homeless.
Definitely nta. I'm allergic to cats so if I dated someone with one it would likely be a discussion, but I would never take it upon myself to get rid of someone's cat. I don't even like the idea of getting rid of someone else's stuff.
I understand how some people can be superstitious of black cats but he looks like a real love bug and I don't understand how somebody could just leave a poor defenseless animal out on the street to Bedford self those are the worst kind of people and have a special place in hell for when they get there
I wouldn't even date let alone live with someone who hates animals. Let alone harms any animal, and my cats especially.
She was thrown out instead of killed? She should consider herself lucky.
I'm gonna go with YTA for having such poor judgement when it comes to your partner. NTA for kicking her out. Just for getting her there in the first place.
That’s a deal breaker for me. I’d have kicked her out that day. I hope the cat came back
NTA! I wouldn't give her more than 24 hrs. This makes me sick! Poor kitty :(
You touch or treat my cat with no respect you are out of my life. Massive red flag, she lucky she's got till the end of the month, I'd turf her and her stuff out immediately
NTA for getting rid of her. Moron for letting her move in in the first place knowing she didn't like the cat. Wasted your and cat's time. P.S. I would have said end of day, not month.
A month is way too long. She deserves to be out right now. I think he needs to get her out before she has a chance to play mind games and convince him that it was a mistake and she is sorry. I am not saying that will happen, but some people do crazy things to get their way.
One of the signs for emerging psychopaths is killing/torturing animals, I would be wary!
So she'll kick the cat out with nowhere to go.... but then has the audacity to complain about the same s**t when she can work, get her own place and feed herself? Nah. F**k that bitch. She's gotta go.
When I moved in with my now wife, she had an alley cat that I wasn't fond of. Of course, he thought I was the bees knees and inside a week we were snuggling together and we were best buddies. Micio was with us for over 10 years and we still have his ashes on our mantle, almost 30 years later. Now you look at my pets sideways and I'll kick your ass on principle.
I had always had cats. Boyfriend had always had dogs. We were both without pets. My husband died after only 356 days married, and my cat died eight months later at age 18. I got a new man before I could bring myself to get another baby. He said let's expand the family. He wanted a puppy. I was willing, but it was January in Pennsylvania. I said, "That puppy's going to need to go out at night..." and he said "Let's get a kitten." And we did. When we took Buster to get him neutered, BF said to the nurse "I thought I was a dog man, but this cat changed my life.". We didn't stop we Buster. We grew the family more with Bose, Spec, and Lloyd. He is the best cat dad ever!
You can't diagnose mental illness over the internet.
Load More Replies... "Don't harm something I love" is usually understood as a boundary without being spoken.
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