Disabled Sis Demands Bro Give Up His Dreams For Her, He Finally Snaps After One Guilt Trip Too Many

In a fantasy book set in Ancient Greece that I read many-many years ago, the authors noted that people, unlike gods and other immortal heroes, are the only creatures capable of sacrificing not others, but themselves. Now, in the 21st century, we still sacrifice our time, energy, and abilities – but does anyone actually appreciate this sacrifice?

Today, we’re going to tell you a story from the user u/loudrain99, who was faced with the difficult challenge of being a caregiver for his disabled elder sister. And who truly feels torn between love for his sis and pity for his life, which, alas, is going South the most dramatic way…

More info: Reddit

Taking care of your relatives is a great responsibility but a great sacrifice as well – and sometimes no one actually appreciates it

Woman wearing headscarf looking tired and frustrated, reflecting the challenges of a caretaker dealing with guilt trips.

Image credits: Getty Images / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

The author of the post is a 27-year-old man who is a guardian of his disabled elder sister who had health issues after undergoing brain surgery decades ago

Text excerpt about caretaker snapping at sister after years of sacrificing career, frustrated by constant guilt trips.

Text post describing a caretaker’s experience supporting a disabled sister after a brain cancer battle affecting her brain.

Text describing caretaker frustrations after sacrificing career, dealing with constant guilt trips from sister.

Alt text: Caretaker frustrated after sacrificing career and dealing with constant guilt trips from sister while assuming caregiver role.

Text excerpt about caretaker sacrificing career and facing frustration from constant guilt trips by sister.

Text excerpt showing frustration of caretaker who sacrificed career to care for sick mother, highlighting guilt trips.

Text showing a caretaker frustrated by her sister's constant guilt trips after sacrificing her career for years.

Text showing frustration of a caretaker dealing with constant guilt trips while sacrificing career and personal time.

Text excerpt showing a caretaker expressing frustration after sacrificing career and dealing with constant guilt trips.

Image credits: loudrain99

Man holding a microphone and note speaking in front of a small audience, expressing caretaker frustration and guilt trips.

Image credits: A.C. / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

The sister is physically capable but can’t drive due to poor eyesight and has some other related activity limitations

Text excerpt showing a caretaker frustrated by guilt trips after sacrificing career opportunities during family obligations.

Text image showing a person describing a trip to a mic about 90 minutes away, related to caretaker frustration and guilt trips.

Text graphic saying Do you have to go that far?, expressing frustration in a caretaker snapping at sis after years of sacrificing career.

Text quote in black font on white background expressing frustration about signing up early to avoid conflict with owner.

Text on a white background showing a frustrated quote expressing conflict between a caretaker and sister.

Text post showing a caretaker expressing frustration after sacrificing career, fed up with constant guilt trips from sister.

Text on a white background saying a few friends moved to Austin for careers and asked about moving down with them.

Text about caretaker frustrated with sister’s guilt trips after years of sacrificing career and difficult living arrangements.

Caretaker expressing frustration after years of sacrificing career and dealing with constant guilt trips from sister.

Text excerpt showing frustration of a caretaker dealing with guilt trips from sister about moving closer to the city.

Image credits: loudrain99

Young man on a bench looking frustrated while using phone, symbolizing caretaker snapping after guilt trips and sacrifice.

Image credits: Aedrian Salazar / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

The man really loves his sis but he’s in despair as he clearly sees as taking care of her actually gets his entire life go awry

Text excerpt showing a caretaker frustrated after sacrificing career and facing constant guilt trips from sister about living arrangements.

Text screenshot showing a frustrated caretaker expressing concerns about career goals and family expectations at age 29.

Text excerpt discussing the caretaker's frustration with her disabled sister and impact on her personal life and career.

Text excerpt about caretaker’s frustration after sacrificing career, highlighting guilt trips and emotional struggle.

Text excerpt from a caretaker frustrated by constant guilt trips after sacrificing career multiple times.

Text excerpt about caretaker frustrated after years of sacrifices, reflecting emotions of guilt and exhaustion.

Caretaker frustrated after years of sacrifices snaps at sister over constant guilt trips and emotional strain.

Text on a white background expressing frustration about a loved one's unwillingness to compromise despite hardships, related to caretaker sacrifices.

Text expressing frustration of a caretaker after sacrificing career, feeling guilt-tripped by sister repeatedly.

Caretaker expressing frustration during a conversation, highlighting sacrifices made and dealing with constant guilt trips from sister.

Image credits: loudrain99

Recently they had a spat over this and the man voiced his thoughts in return of her reproaches and guilt-tripping, ending up with her storming out

So, the Original Poster (OP) is a 27-year-old man and has been the official guardian for his elder sister for several years. Now 37 years old, she underwent surgery for brain cancer as a child and is now fully physically capable, but due to the aftereffects of the surgery, she has poor eyesight, is unable to drive, and is unable to properly care for herself too.

Our hero, his disabled sister, and their another sis, slightly older than the author, all live in their late parents’ house. And it seems their older sister is perfectly happy with this arrangement. The other siblings dream of a career, a family and kids – but, sad as it is to realize, their sister gets in the way of these plans.

For example, the OP, in addition to working in fast food, has been trying his hand at stand-up comedy for many years – and quite successfully. From time to time, he’s invited to various shows in other cities – and each time, his sis clearly expresses her displeasure at being left alone. When the guy wanted to move to Austin with his friends to work as a comedian, she didn’t even want to hear about moving.

Recently, the author even lost it after another reproach from the sister and told her everything that was in his mind. For example, that he and his other sis wanted to have a life outside their family home too, and that it was unfair for her to blame them for this. She got upset and stormed out to her room, and the OP, left feeling frustrated, decided to ask people online for advice.

A caretaker expressing frustration while talking to sister in a living room, highlighting years of career sacrifices and guilt trips.

Image credits: Vitaly Gariev / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

Well, the first thing we can say to the original poster is that he’s actually far from alone in this situation. At least, the recent survey conducted by the Associated Press-NORC Center for Public Affairs Research found that the caregiving situation in the US is hopelessly far from ideal. For example, 25% of respondents admitted that they’ve cut back on their own retirement savings.

The study also found that 41% of caregivers surveyed have dipped into their personal savings, and about a quarter spend 40 or more hours per week on caregiving. As we can see, the situation is quite sad, and the author is in fact relatively lucky that his sister doesn’t require more extensive care; otherwise, he’d be in a much more difficult financial situation.

In fact, the question of ethical support for family caregivers has been raised in our society long before the birth of the OP. For example, the author of this study, published on PubMed in 1988, notes that caregivers can be socially isolated. “If heroic demands are to be made on family members, a richer moral culture is required, not just the provision of improved social services,” the scientist says.

Most people in the comments under the original post just agreed that he’s completely innocent of the current case, and that both he and his another sister have every right to live their own lives. So the older sister could’ve realized this and actually helped her siblings instead of guilt-tripping them. Well, do you, our dear readers, also agree with this?

Many commenters gave the man their sincere support and sympathy, claiming that he actually deserves to live his own life

Reddit comment discussing caretaker frustrations and exploring legal options for alternative living arrangements for a sibling.

Comment from anon explaining frustration of caretaker snapping after years of sacrificing career, facing constant guilt trips from sister.

Comment discussing caretaker snapping at sister after years of sacrificing career, frustrated by constant guilt trips.

Screenshot of a social media comment expressing frustration in a difficult caretaker situation involving guilt trips.

Text message from caretaker expressing frustration over sister’s constant guilt trips after years of sacrificing career.

Comment text showing a discussion about a caretaker snapping at sister after years of sacrificing career and dealing with guilt trips.

Comment discussing caretaker frustrations and guilt trips after sacrificing career and personal life for caregiving duties.

Comment discussing caretaker frustration after sacrificing career and dealing with sibling's constant guilt trips and emotional challenges.

Comment text about caretaker snapping at sister after sacrificing career, feeling frustrated by constant guilt trips.

Comment discussing caretaker frustrations with a dependent sister and concerns about her helplessness and independence.

Screenshot of a Reddit comment discussing the frustration of a caretaker snapping at her sister after years of sacrifice and guilt trips.

Caretaker frustrated by constant guilt trips after years of sacrificing career, seeking support for sister's disability needs.

Text comment offering advice to caretaker frustrated by constant guilt trips from sister after sacrificing career.

Comment advising exploring group homes or independent living options for sister, highlighting caretaker’s need for a life beyond guilt trips.

Screenshot of a Reddit post discussing caretaker frustration and guilt trips after years of sacrificing career for sibling care.

Comment about caretaker frustration and guilt trips, emphasizing sacrifices and family care responsibilities.

Caretaker frustrated with sister’s constant guilt trips after years of sacrificing career and personal goals.

Screenshot of an online comment discussing a caretaker frustrated by constant guilt trips from her sister.

Commenter advising caretaker to set boundaries and consider assisted living for sister to avoid resentment and regain life balance.

Comment expressing frustration from a caretaker snapping at sister after years of sacrificing career and guilt trips.

Poll Question

Total votes ·

Thanks! Check out the results:

Total votes ·

Newsletter

Subscribe to Access
Exclusive Polls

Subscribe

By entering your email and clicking Subscribe, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. You are also agreeing to our Privacy Policy.

Thank you! You've successfully subscribed to newsletters!

Anyone can write on Bored Panda. Start writing!

Follow Bored Panda on Google News!

Follow us on Flipboard.com/@boredpanda!