Weddings can be a minefield of social etiquette. You need quite a bit of experience to deliver everything that’s expected from the perfect guest.
But even a hundred ceremonies couldn’t have prepared cosplayer and Reddit user DanWantsDeath for what he experienced on his friend’s big day.
The woman and her fiancé invited people to an “engagement party” and once it started, the couple revealed that it was actually their wedding. And it may have worked. If DanWantsDeath wasn’t dressed as the Corpse Bride.
This cosplayer decided to attend his friend’s engagement party in a wedding dress
Image credits: hidylle (not the actual photo)
But once it started, he learned that it was the actual ceremony
Image credits: Warner Bros
Image credits: veloritapdx (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Daniel Frese (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Christina A. Meador (not the actual photo)
Image credits: DanWantsDeath
It’s difficult to sympathize with the newlyweds after they purposefully misled everyone
Image credits: Pavel Danilyuk (not the actual photo)
In general, an engagement party tends to be more casual than a wedding reception. Lisa Sanchez, in-house stylist and fashion editor of The Nines, told BRIDES that choosing the right outfit depends on the season, time, and venue.
With that being said, the typical engagement party attire etiquette rules are:
- Avoid wearing white. Even if it’s not their wedding night, it’s still a wedding-related celebration.
- Pay attention to the dress code recommendations. “If no dress code is advised, then you can assume business professional attire is appropriate,” Sanchez said. You can also contact the couple’s family and friends if you don’t want to ask them directly.
- Skip the jeans. “Generally, jeans are a no-go, but the venue could affect the style,” Sanchez added “For example, if the event is at a pub, then dark jeans paired with a nice shirt and jacket for a man and a formal top for a woman could work.” She recommends skipping lighter and distressed jeans so you don’t look overly casual.
- Wear something tasteful that isn’t too bold. “Your goal as a guest is to celebrate the special couple, so it would be in poor taste to overshadow the event with a lavish, show-stealing outfit,” Sanchez highlighted. “You are not expected to totally mute your individuality, but be respectful.”
While you could argue that DanWantsDeath went for an extravagant look, even the groom reassured him that it was fine when he informed the guests about the plot twist. So you can’t really blame the cosplayer, can you?
There’s also a chance that the actual reason for the estrangement lies somewhere else
Image credits: Polinach (not the actual photo)
“The wedding actually becomes a convenient and concrete vehicle for individuals to express resentments they may have had historically,” Seth Meyers, a clinical psychologist and the author of Dr. Seth’s Love Prescription: Overcome Relationship Repetition Syndrome and Find the Love You Deserve, explained to The New York Times.
(That can go both ways and could explain, for example, why many brides and grooms recall a friend hurling cruel, seemingly deep-seated comments at them when they weren’t asked to be a bridesmaid or when they weren’t allowed to bring a plus-one.)
A wedding represents change and human beings often struggle with it. It’s the start of a new phase and sometimes you just aren’t ready to take the leap.
As his story went viral, the guy explained that pretty much everyone was dressed in funny and silly costumes
Some commenters were confused to hear a man was wearing a dress
And his friend is still angry with him
At least people who read the cosplayer’s post have been really supportive of him
A MALE cosplayer "outshines" the bride wearing a Corpse Bride costume???? The bride definitely has an "Ugly-Duck-Complex"! .... As the bride I would have made him my shadow, grinning with him in every picture!
And have him stand beside her at the ceremony! How funny would that be?!
Honestly? If I had a wedding, I wouldn't care what people wore as long as the hubby showed up.
I think most of us are like that. And if you really care what people wear to your wedding, it's probably a good idea to tell people it's actually a wedding.
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To be FAIR who would ever think someone (especially a MAN) would wear a wedding dress to an engagement party? But he UNbecame TA when he asked the fiance if he should change. The fiance wasn't really thinking when he said it was ok, but HE became TA when he asked the OP why he told the woman!
Don't agree Jude - he went to the trouble to check and the groom said he was okay to stay in the dress. The groom shouldn't be such a wimp about that decision now and be lying to his wife about it. In fact it says something about that person that they're not prepared to be honest with his wife and so will throw this friend under the bus - or says something about the wife that he's too scared to be honest with her. The OP didn't know this was a wedding and did nothing wrong - he dressed for a costume party and even tried to apologise. If you're going to spring a surprise wedding on people, people who have been invited to a costume party, then you have to accept that the clothing might not be ideal for a wedding. As for who would think someone would come to a costume party dressed in a wedding dress, I held a costume party once and someone came in a wedding dress - I've often had men dressed in woman's clothes too. My BIL came as Lara Croft once.
I mean, yes, but also no. I don't care what you're wearing in the sense that it's only clothes and I couldn't care less who "outshines" whom. BUT, if you wear a wedding dress to somebody's wedding *knowingly and on purpose* then it's not about the clothes. Like unless you're ignorant to that culture somehow (or like here, you didn't know it was a wedding) then you're doing it to make some kind of statement and it's not a good one. I would certainly be wondering about that.
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I’m paid $185 per hour to complete the task using an Apple laptop. I absolutely didn’t think it was conceivable, but my dependable buddy convinced me to give this straightforward an03 chance a go after she made $26,547 in just 4 weeks working on it. Visit the following page to find out additional . . instructions—————————>>> 𝐖𝐰𝐰.𝐣𝐨𝐛𝐬𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐮𝐞.𝐜𝐨𝐦
NTA. It's ridiculous. You didn't know it was a wedding, and it wasn't even a real wedding dress, you were covered in a blue paint, ffs
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He shouldn't have worn the dress but it was a faux pas and he's not TA cuz he tried to rectify.
I know you're coming from a right place but hear me out: the outfit OP wore wasn't to upshine the bride, he didn't know it was a wedding, and overall it's a perfect and fun cosplay to do on that ocasion. If op used in the actual wedding maybe i'll consider him TA, but is not the case.
In his defense I think the title could have been better. OP didn't technically go to a wedding, they went to a party and had a wedding thrust upon them.
Please only use downvotes for spam etc. People should be allowed to express different opinions without being blocked from posting.
I thought they changed that idiot system because everyone hated it so much? There’s the “report” function one can use for spam, under the three dots by the comments.
People are allowed to express any opinion. Just like everyone else is allowed to express their dislike of it. Like I did with your comment, since I didn't appreciate you trying to tell people what to do.
Why is everyone down voting Jude, they said he's "not TA" = NTA, reread their post.
A MALE cosplayer "outshines" the bride wearing a Corpse Bride costume???? The bride definitely has an "Ugly-Duck-Complex"! .... As the bride I would have made him my shadow, grinning with him in every picture!
And have him stand beside her at the ceremony! How funny would that be?!
Honestly? If I had a wedding, I wouldn't care what people wore as long as the hubby showed up.
I think most of us are like that. And if you really care what people wear to your wedding, it's probably a good idea to tell people it's actually a wedding.
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
To be FAIR who would ever think someone (especially a MAN) would wear a wedding dress to an engagement party? But he UNbecame TA when he asked the fiance if he should change. The fiance wasn't really thinking when he said it was ok, but HE became TA when he asked the OP why he told the woman!
Don't agree Jude - he went to the trouble to check and the groom said he was okay to stay in the dress. The groom shouldn't be such a wimp about that decision now and be lying to his wife about it. In fact it says something about that person that they're not prepared to be honest with his wife and so will throw this friend under the bus - or says something about the wife that he's too scared to be honest with her. The OP didn't know this was a wedding and did nothing wrong - he dressed for a costume party and even tried to apologise. If you're going to spring a surprise wedding on people, people who have been invited to a costume party, then you have to accept that the clothing might not be ideal for a wedding. As for who would think someone would come to a costume party dressed in a wedding dress, I held a costume party once and someone came in a wedding dress - I've often had men dressed in woman's clothes too. My BIL came as Lara Croft once.
I mean, yes, but also no. I don't care what you're wearing in the sense that it's only clothes and I couldn't care less who "outshines" whom. BUT, if you wear a wedding dress to somebody's wedding *knowingly and on purpose* then it's not about the clothes. Like unless you're ignorant to that culture somehow (or like here, you didn't know it was a wedding) then you're doing it to make some kind of statement and it's not a good one. I would certainly be wondering about that.
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
I’m paid $185 per hour to complete the task using an Apple laptop. I absolutely didn’t think it was conceivable, but my dependable buddy convinced me to give this straightforward an03 chance a go after she made $26,547 in just 4 weeks working on it. Visit the following page to find out additional . . instructions—————————>>> 𝐖𝐰𝐰.𝐣𝐨𝐛𝐬𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐮𝐞.𝐜𝐨𝐦
NTA. It's ridiculous. You didn't know it was a wedding, and it wasn't even a real wedding dress, you were covered in a blue paint, ffs
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
He shouldn't have worn the dress but it was a faux pas and he's not TA cuz he tried to rectify.
I know you're coming from a right place but hear me out: the outfit OP wore wasn't to upshine the bride, he didn't know it was a wedding, and overall it's a perfect and fun cosplay to do on that ocasion. If op used in the actual wedding maybe i'll consider him TA, but is not the case.
In his defense I think the title could have been better. OP didn't technically go to a wedding, they went to a party and had a wedding thrust upon them.
Please only use downvotes for spam etc. People should be allowed to express different opinions without being blocked from posting.
I thought they changed that idiot system because everyone hated it so much? There’s the “report” function one can use for spam, under the three dots by the comments.
People are allowed to express any opinion. Just like everyone else is allowed to express their dislike of it. Like I did with your comment, since I didn't appreciate you trying to tell people what to do.
Why is everyone down voting Jude, they said he's "not TA" = NTA, reread their post.