Making a character in a book seem realistic and interesting is no easy task. It’s not down to just your skills as a writer, though. You actually have to know a bit about who you’re writing about. In other words—do your research. Unfortunately, there are some male writers out there who seem to have major problems writing female characters and seem shy about asking their female friends for advice.

That’s where the ‘Men Write Women’ Twitter page comes in. It documents the scariest and most cringe-worthy examples of men writing about women without having any idea about them or their anatomy. Scroll down and read for yourselves, dear Pandas, because some of these examples have to be seen to be believed—that’s how unreal they are. Remember to upvote the best of the worst.

The project was started back in 2019 when Meghan Vondriska launched her version of the ‘Men Writing Women’ Reddit community. Now, the ‘Men Write Women’ Twitter page has 63k followers and there are 666 fans who follow their Instagram page. Very spooky and perfect for Halloween. "Women just want to be written as human. That's it. There isn't some wild scientific equation to writing women, and it isn't difficult. Write them as human, with complex feelings, not as body parts that happen to be put together into a feminine form," Vondriska told Bored Panda.

More info: Twitter | Instagram | MegVondriska.com

#1

This Is The Best One Yet

This Is The Best One Yet

ewillard42 Report

Stephanie Did It
Community Member
6 months ago

Lord of the Toilet Rings

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#2

We Don’t Get Real Pockets In Pants Because We Have Tiny Purses In Our Vaginas!!! (Stuart Woods, Desperate Measures)

We Don’t Get Real Pockets In Pants Because We Have Tiny Purses In Our Vaginas!!! (Stuart Woods, Desperate Measures)

menwritewomen Report

Samantha Lomb
Community Member
6 months ago

This is horrifying. Has this man ever seen a vagina? I could not imagine jamming credit cards up it.

Pink kitty
Community Member
6 months ago

I checked on Google. Apparently he has been divorced 3 times. Wonder why?!

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Foxxy (The Original)
Community Member
6 months ago

Dammit, how did he know about our hidden vagina purse.

A Confused Person
Community Member
4 months ago

lo and behold, you are everywhere again

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kasa alex
Community Member
6 months ago

Oh - no one else tucks their tiny purse into their vagina?

Erica Cochrane
Community Member
6 months ago

I work in a coffee shop, it's bad enough when people produce money out of their bras, if they started fishing around in their vagina for the money, I'd nope the hell out of there

Wonderful
Community Member
6 months ago

“Damnit the credit card reader is “gummed up” again. Hey Erica, go get the Lysol wipes! I gotta finish making this latte.”

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Jo Choto
Community Member
6 months ago

Anything that would hold a credit card, a driver's license and some cash would not be welcome in my hoo-ha, thanks very much.

Tabitha L
Community Member
6 months ago

Amen!

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Bowtechie
Community Member
6 months ago

I love that the second person in the conversation doesn't even blink at the remark. Just '"where does she live?"'

Arctic Fox Lover
Community Member
6 months ago

Uh... He thinks we use that for storage??

A Random Panda
Community Member
6 months ago

Particularly nasty on your period.

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Vincent Philippart
Community Member
6 months ago

Is that possible? (Don't judge. I don't do vaginas, so they're a bit of mystery to me)

Foxxy (The Original)
Community Member
6 months ago (edited)

Probably possible but certainly not recommended and would be super uncomfortable.

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SheHulk
Community Member
6 months ago

Ha! I once smuggled a burner phone, 1,254 million dollars and a small to scale model (1:1000) of the Taj Mahal in my secret purse!

Agata Wightman
Community Member
6 months ago

And a passport, car keys, some chewing gum...

No You
Community Member
6 months ago (edited)

Oh yeah I can carry that for you here let me just *pulls down pants*

Granny
Community Member
6 months ago

Boy that sounds comfy and add a sanwich why don't you

Rebekah
Community Member
6 months ago

You should see me make change.

WildBerry
Community Member
6 months ago

ROFLMAO

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Deb Neuheimer
Community Member
6 months ago

I feel bad for the cashier. Hold up, lemme get my credit card out... Do you accept tap?

A Random Panda 2
Community Member
6 months ago

My lower body winced.

Magna Linnevers
Community Member
6 months ago

Imagine walking, sitting, or any movement with that shoved up there....

WildBerry
Community Member
6 months ago

Maybe similar to a menstrual cup?

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Sarah Young
Community Member
6 months ago

I mean that's where I store my valuables.

Sasha Kuleshov
Community Member
6 months ago

Oh yes, that purse is $8.99 on Amazon! XD

s. vitkovitsky
Community Member
6 months ago

Read one of his books once. Thst was enough. The sex scene was basically she's sitting there on a counter or something, and he basically walks into her. Literally. The foreplsy was walking towards her, I guess.

Wonderful
Community Member
6 months ago

My husband used to work the door at a nightclub and now I’m imagining some chick walking up to him tells him to hold on a sec. and then does a squat and fishes her iD out. I hope he didn’t touch the id and that her hands were clean. Also does she just casually shove it back in there after he stamps her hand? I mean what are the protocols for this handy way of not carrying a purse?

KT Pinto
Community Member
6 months ago

Did she put it up there, or did the murderer? You don't know, because it's only a paragraph of a story. Only thing the author is guilty of is bad writing.

M Kate McCulloch
Community Member
6 months ago

That's not actually where we would tuck something. maybe in our bra...

WildBerry
Community Member
6 months ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Speak for yourself. Women have been caught smuggling items up there.

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Carol Barvir
Community Member
6 months ago

I've heard she keeps her cellphone there too (on 'vibrate')

WildBerry
Community Member
6 months ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Nah. There are toys made just for leaving it up there so no need to use a cellphone.

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Jeff Requier
Community Member
6 months ago

hahah, it is the prison pocket

Animal lover❤
Community Member
6 months ago

Oh my god, I somehow felt that

Sophie Babbitt
Community Member
5 months ago

Im more than a little horrified at the mere prospect of carrying ANYTHING in my privates, let alone a hard square of plastic!

Kay Maxey
Community Member
6 months ago

Ouch!

Ella Blackwood
Community Member
6 months ago

He's obviously a virgin.

Elizabeth Guiles
Community Member
6 months ago

owie. no woman would do that

Trish Cacciato
Community Member
6 months ago

A tiny purse, WTF. NO ‘tiny’ purse could hold all that stuff, lol and no vagina can hold a purse, geesh!

Kelly MS
Community Member
6 months ago

This "author" has probably never been laid by a woman.

CHARLOTTE SCHWEIZER
Community Member
6 months ago

ow ow ow ow that lady must be desperate if shes stuffing things up her vagina that aint supposed to be there. although I must say it'd be a smart way to hide your money...

Eulalie Grace
Community Member
6 months ago

Well, I checked on eBay, and I couldn't find a tiny vaginal purse. Damn!

Idk Katniss Potter
Community Member
6 months ago

You have got to be kidding me 😳

Evripidou Maria
Community Member
6 months ago

don;t forget her mobile and mask

Sandra Lent
Community Member
6 months ago

This guy/writer is either clueless, or has a sideways sense of humour.

Mumof1
Community Member
6 months ago

Of course - it's where we all keep our money etc - isn't it?

Valerio Mitritsakis
Community Member
6 months ago

I think this is intended as a joke in the lines of "How do you fit 4 elephants in an autobianchi? Two in the front and two in the back".

Pheebs
Community Member
6 months ago

All I can think is ow, ow, ow, ow......

The one and only
Community Member
6 months ago

uh- good lord no. Are y'all men ok?

Kathy Bouchard
Community Member
6 months ago

What’s really funny is the very last line...that’s really misogynistic. “Where does she live?”

Paizleypie
Community Member
6 months ago

Um, OUCH!

🌺🍍🌼🌻🌼🍍🌺
Community Member
6 months ago

what the f**k? seriously? unless this woman was a sex worker, or just an extremely weird person, this would NEVER HAPPEN

Vorknkx
Community Member
6 months ago

This is even funnier to me because I know a guy named Dino and now I can troll him with this :P

Audrey Conrad
Community Member
4 weeks ago

yup. just fitting a "bag" in our vadonkadonk. (i don't wanna get in trouble)

Wannabeee
Community Member
1 month ago

He has to be a virgin right???

Little Dino
Community Member
3 months ago

I'm offended that we have the same name

Mónica Elisabeth Sacco
Community Member
6 months ago

He should shove a credit card in his a**e, sure it fits!

Bored Little Panda
Community Member
6 months ago

Damn she gonna need some super max tampons!

COcO BAMa
Community Member
6 months ago

Omg that's freaking scary maybe it's because stores sell us those pants with fake pockets

AnInrovert
Community Member
6 months ago

Ummmmm... what?

Grace Smith
Community Member
6 months ago

What the f**k?

Todd Hollfelder
Community Member
6 months ago

I now have an awful image of gashes caused inside from insertion and removal.

WildBerry
Community Member
6 months ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

The cards are inside a purse. Lubricated purse. LOL !!

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Ivy Ruonakoski
Community Member
6 months ago

Oh lord.

Micchi Dawn
Community Member
6 months ago

Man wait... A tiny purse holding what? Tucked where?? 😆😆

Syed Salah
Community Member
6 months ago

Detective was talking about an elephant . I think.

I I
Community Member
6 months ago

she also had a room to rent

Bama Belle
Community Member
6 months ago

In this doofus' defense, my sister's SIL is a hospital nurse. She once told us a story about a female patient who was brought from the local jail. The woman was running a high fever and delirious. Doctors began their battery of tests, including a pelvic exam. Our good nurse told that when the doctor inserted the speculum, he said, "Made in America?". The woman had a pack of cigarettes shoved up her vagina. The first words the doc saw were...you guessed it. It's not a "tiny purse" with credit cards but it does show that when properly motivated, we can get some weird things up in there.

Tabitha L
Community Member
6 months ago

So what is the "proper motivation" for storing a purse with credit cards, license, and cash inside your vagina? Is the character in the story in prison? I realize large things CAN fit inside some vaginas. But that doesn't mean women walk around all day with everyday items shoved up there.

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Michał Jastrzębski
Community Member
6 months ago

looks like someone wanted to write about prison pockets waaay too much...

ShikamaruPanda
Community Member
6 months ago

isn't this book famous??? WTF

Kalpana M
Community Member
6 months ago

🤦‍♀️

Sk FaiXan
Community Member
6 months ago

few bucks? wtf!!! you sure not talking about doraemons 4d pocket

Lord Mysticlaw
Community Member
6 months ago

What??

Leah Pheonix
Community Member
1 week ago

Why would you want to know where this lady lives???

juniper chatham
Community Member
2 weeks ago

i have one and last time i checked i cant put a purse in it XD

Nora the mistake 0_o
Community Member
3 weeks ago

wait i can do that cool XD

Pujitha Gaddam
Community Member
1 month ago

not for me hecc noo

Kyle Bartz
Community Member
1 month ago

Just because a single character in a book does something really strange, now this is somehow saying that all women do this? Relax.

BG
Community Member
2 months ago

"License and registration please."

purple boi
Community Member
2 months ago

how can a girl put a purse(no matter how small)in her v-v-...private part!?!?

Shrabonti Bagchi
Community Member
2 months ago

And it's so matter-of-fact, like he believes most women do this.

Zet
Community Member
2 months ago

i solved the case the killer showed it in there thinking women have a lot of space.. look for a misogynistic killer!

Deep
Community Member
2 months ago

My eyes!! My eyes!! My eyes!!

BananaAnna
Community Member
3 months ago

"Obviously, this woman is a member of the Ubangi tribe. They are famous for stretching out their ear lobes, mouths, necks. Stretching out their vaginas is certainly a new note. But, I can see the reasoning behind this: easier births, no handbags, carry small children in a sheltered place, and hide left over-food. However, this is a severe disadvantage to congenial bliss" said Dino.

Anonymous Panda
Community Member
3 months ago

No, just know. This is gross and sounds extremely uncomfortable.

Furry_Danger
Community Member
3 months ago

...Why do you want to know where she lives?

Leila Noury
Community Member
3 months ago

- borfs -

LegendYak
Community Member
3 months ago

I dunno bout you but I always have a purse in my vagina. Just for emergencies, you know?

phantom buni
Community Member
3 months ago

Ow

Rhylie W.
Community Member
3 months ago

omg I'm dying. This man has never had interaction with a female, has he?

Hi Buddy
Community Member
3 months ago

Oh god I hope she’s not on her period that would bad

Taylor Bentley
Community Member
4 months ago

WHEEZE

Leslie K Von Dell
Community Member
4 months ago

WTF? Oh, yea, excuse me. I need to duck into the nearest bathroom to get my purse out in order to pay for my groceries, could you point me to the nearest one? Did this guy come from a different planet where the alien physiology is totally different or what?

Dorothy Cloud
Community Member
4 months ago

Not only the author, but books are proof read before printing. Where was that person's head?

deathmetalpegasus12
Community Member
4 months ago

CRIIIINGE

Pansexual-Pancake
Community Member
4 months ago

Elizabeth swaney is the name of my fren

Katya Davidson
Community Member
4 months ago

Big enough for a credit card is not "tiny" when it comes to ramming something up yer hoohaw

Lillian Castellow
Community Member
5 months ago

no no no no no no no no no no wtf

invisible sheep
Community Member
5 months ago

this man must be a virgin

Banjo Peppers
Community Member
5 months ago

Real world women - hide packages of cocaine in their vaginas. This comment section - omg this fictional dead woman couldn’t have put a tiny purse with two credit cards inside her.

Banjo Peppers
Community Member
5 months ago

And obviously i don’t mean ALL women hide cocaine inside their vaginas.

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Aidan Garza
Community Member
5 months ago

I'm uncomfortable....

Izzy Curer
Community Member
6 months ago

I mean... maybe...?

CatWoman312
Community Member
6 months ago

Ummm ouch

Lila Nguyễn
Community Member
6 months ago

TBF it was a woman who thought it okay to put a ROCK up there

Rachel Waller
Community Member
6 months ago

For everyone making comments about giving birth, just because it could technically hypothetically fit doesn't mean it would be remotely comfortable or possible to walk normally.

Nicole Tomme
Community Member
6 months ago

Wow. Just.... Wow.

HufflepuffPanda
Community Member
6 months ago

Umm....

Lydia Coy
Community Member
6 months ago

👁👄👁

Anxious-lesbian-disaster
Community Member
6 months ago

Definitely a virgin

Zoë
Community Member
6 months ago

So if Mary Poppins ever lost her magic bag.... no problem! Vagina to the rescue! Hey everybody, lunch is on me, just have to grab my MasterCard out of my vagina.....

Tina Hugh
Community Member
6 months ago

Good God. It hurt just reading that.

Macy Mudder
Community Member
6 months ago

heeheeheeheehee

Dogo the Dog
Community Member
6 months ago

Okay, so he’s got no idea how this works.

Anxious-lesbian-disaster
Community Member
6 months ago

Whattttttttttt

J
Community Member
6 months ago

I'm... I'm legitimately terrified

Stacy Dalley
Community Member
6 months ago

It’s not a pocket!!!

shado
Community Member
6 months ago

erm ... in reality, truth is stranger than fiction ... maybe said writer has just been to one too many peeler joints to see one too many strippers popping ping-pong balls out of their vags and into customer's beer mugs ... maybe?

Lunar Owo Potato
Community Member
6 months ago

The next president needs to put pockets into girls/women pants

Brandi VanSteenwyk
Community Member
6 months ago

This leaves me wondering exactly what the author encounters when he approaches his significant other in intimacy. I can only pray that the gentleman is gay.

Blue
Community Member
6 months ago

Wow, Clearly never had the opportunity to see an actual vagina. LMFAO

Gayle Hunter-Gatherer
Community Member
6 months ago

Not in touch with reality? Or maybe he knows perfectly well that it wouldn't be possible. Like serious pain impossible. That's creepier.

Katharina Rosskopf
Community Member
6 months ago

Did the man ever have sex!?!

WildBerry
Community Member
6 months ago

He had sex with one of those performers who shoots ping-pong balls outta there so he thought why not when it came to a purse with credit cards.

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Punyasloka Sahoo 17198
Community Member
6 months ago

This man must be an alien!

Shelli Aderman
Community Member
6 months ago

😳😳😳😳😳OUCH!

Colleen Hindson
Community Member
6 months ago

How absurd!

Patrick O'Harris
Community Member
6 months ago

I heard women sometimes hide money and IDs in their bras but their vaginas... Wtf. How does he imagine that in front of a club or something? -"Yeah, give me a second" she said and grabbed unter her skirt to pull a purse out of her vagina.- Does the author actually know women? Like any at all?

Thomas
Community Member
6 months ago

Looks like something out of Cyanide&Happiness... http://explosm.net/comics/1245/

Carol Barvir
Community Member
6 months ago

I'

Paula Norman
Community Member
6 months ago

So she would have had plenty of awkward moments in the grocery store/atm then..."hold on a sec I'll just grab my purse".

Cybele Spanjaard
Community Member
6 months ago

It that so Stuart.. are you gay ( not judgemental by the way) and never looked at a woman's private parts even on a medical chart?

Liz
Community Member
6 months ago

I believe this girl is a murder victim and the murderer put the purse there... just a thought 🤷‍♀️

Quazmodic
Community Member
6 months ago

Let's be honest. With some women, it doesn't even have to be a tiny purse. Anything from the luggage department would work just as well. ;)

WildBerry
Community Member
6 months ago

Thank you for that.

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Gerry Higgins
Community Member
6 months ago

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Well if you can squeeze a baby out of there a tiny purse should be no problem. With keys, phone, and a few other things as well.

Full of Giggles
Community Member
6 months ago

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This comment has been deleted.

Mike Kozubski
Community Member
6 months ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Wow seems from the comments and the fact this is posted here...that he knows women better then they know themselves. As it seems women here think this is fantasy or impossible when it's not. I know many who use it as storage, and can first a bit up there Women do not knowi women as well as men, women know themselves and maybe their small circle..which will likely be just like them...they do not know other women. Men do as they date and do not stick to a group, they know many types of women who all act differently. This here shows that, as not one woman was even capable of say "well that's not me but I don't know other women" they are all just like yup I know for sure because, well just because. This man like other men have met women and will speak from experience you lack as you only know yourself and spend to much time judging other women to actually like and know them. Some women do do this. So the fact it is here shows how little womens know about other women.

Tabitha L
Community Member
6 months ago

Yes. Please explain vaginas to all the women here. We clearly need a man to tell us how they work. You can fit all of those things in your asshole. So does this mean it is reasonable to assume that you do??

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Truth Monster
Community Member
6 months ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

I feel this is missing a larger context possibly. Like, did Elizabeth think she was in danger and there was a likelihood of them trying to hide her identity?

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#3

"3 And A Half Milliboobs Per Handful"

"3 And A Half Milliboobs Per Handful"

Christimay , www.reddit.com Report

Samantha Lomb
Community Member
6 months ago

hahaha omg. Miliboobs

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"I'm an avid reader, but the straw that broke the camel's back was a novel my boyfriend lent me, where the female character was described by her breasts and the male character was described by his personality. Working in advertising, I tend to be Very Online, and so taking my anger to Twitter seemed like a natural parallel. I was familiar with the Men Writing Women subreddit, but created a Twitter account in order to craft a consistent narrative and to build a community that wasn't hidden behind anonymity," Vondriska revealed what inspired her to create 'Men Write Women.'

Vondriska, from Wisconsin, devours 3 to 5 books each week. (Meanwhile, our piles of started-but-unfinished books keep on growing.)

According to the founder of the 'Men Write Women' Twitter page, a lot of male writers who tend to be thought of as the "founders of the literary canon" are continuous offenders. "John Updike, for instance. But the greatest repeat offender is definitely Stephen King. His portrayal of his female characters is honestly offensive," Vondriska said.

#4

Yes, Men Would Be Amaaazing At Handling Pregnancy - Evolution Really Screwed This One Up. Bonus Points For “No Woman Gets Raped Unless She’s Looking For It.”

Yes, Men Would Be Amaaazing At Handling Pregnancy - Evolution Really Screwed This One Up. Bonus Points For “No Woman Gets Raped Unless She’s Looking For It.”

cheribella Report

Samantha Lomb
Community Member
6 months ago

I feel like this idiot may also be a sitting member of Congress. https://time.com/3001785/todd-akin-legitimate-rape-msnbc-child-of-rape/

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#5

Well Damn, Where Are All My Kids Then??

Well Damn, Where Are All My Kids Then??

lilycama Report

Angela Turrall
Community Member
6 months ago

But did she have a tiny purse in her vagina? Just big enough for her drivers license?

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#6

Let's Not Forget This Gem Either

Let's Not Forget This Gem Either

isapphic Report

Stephanie Did It
Community Member
6 months ago (edited)

Just imagine the reverse: "every hair in my beard becoming a tiny penis"

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However, it isn't all doom and gloom in the literary world. There are male writers who can write women well, too. "Terry Pratchett is wonderful, and I've yet to see a submission from Michael Crichton," Vondriska shared that she, like many of us, is a Pratchett fan.

Vondriska also pointed out that, in her opinion, the best writers are well-read. So she encouraged all of us to read more and (most importantly) read more widely.

"Pay attention to what you're reading, and who you're reading. You have to make sure your bookshelf isn't made up of just men. Add in some spice—some female authors, some nonbinary authors, authors of color. And lastly, just because you were assigned a book in high school, doesn't mean its good!"

#7

Ugly Women Without Good Personalities Should Kill Themselves [rivers Of London By Ben Aaronovitch]

Ugly Women Without Good Personalities Should Kill Themselves [rivers Of London By Ben Aaronovitch]

reddit.com Report

Vincent Philippart
Community Member
6 months ago (edited)

Jesus...

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#8

This Made My Breasts Frown

This Made My Breasts Frown

lordeandsaviour Report

Rowlie
Community Member
6 months ago

Lately my breasts only cry and sigh deeply. I miss all the smiling

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#9

That's Not How Any Of This Works

That's Not How Any Of This Works

menwritewomen Report

Stephanie Did It
Community Member
6 months ago

HAHAHAHAHA

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#10

Unsurprisingly, The Book's Terrible Writing From A "Proclaimed" Writer Does Not End Here (The Wedding Plot, Jeffrey Eugenides)

Unsurprisingly, The Book's Terrible Writing From A "Proclaimed" Writer Does Not End Here (The Wedding Plot, Jeffrey Eugenides)

menwritewomen Report

Samantha Lomb
Community Member
6 months ago

Boobs are testicles. They don't "withdraw" because there is muscle and a rib cage underneath and they are just mounds of fat and milk producing tissue. I feel like so many people here did not pay attention in health class. How can they be so clueless about the female body?

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#11

Male Authors Writing Women Are Actually Just Horror Stories And Here's Why

Male Authors Writing Women Are Actually Just Horror Stories And Here's Why

isapphic Report

Vincent Philippart
Community Member
6 months ago

She was "probably" molested?? How does that work?

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#12

Ah Yes, Exactly How I'd Describe Myself (The Diamond Age, Neal Stephenson)

Ah Yes, Exactly How I'd Describe Myself (The Diamond Age, Neal Stephenson)

menwritewomen Report

Theodore Theodora
Community Member
6 months ago

Woman: "I'm SO HOT omg." Dude: "Just like my dead wife." What?!

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#13

I'm Sorry, Her Breasts Do What

I'm Sorry, Her Breasts Do What

alexis_writes1 Report

Stephanie Did It
Community Member
6 months ago

I've had more bras ripped to pieces that way

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#14

She's Eleven And Scared But Let's Talk About Her Nipples

She's Eleven And Scared But Let's Talk About Her Nipples

Professor_Owl Report

Rowlie
Community Member
6 months ago

Stranger danger

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#15

This Whole Book Has Both My Eyes And My Boobs Rolling.

This Whole Book Has Both My Eyes And My Boobs Rolling.

icomebearingpoop Report

Squee
Community Member
6 months ago

H-how would you even...?

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#16

Be Horrified With The Rest Of Us

Be Horrified With The Rest Of Us

meganaderr Report

Lord Mysticlaw
Community Member
6 months ago

Men like Conde should not be surprised that sexy women love other women, and he really should try to help that male chauvinism.

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#17

Breasts Totally Get Scared

Breasts Totally Get Scared

Report

Stephanie Did It
Community Member
6 months ago

My breasts are embarrassed by this.

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#18

The Count Of Monte Cristo- 1884

The Count Of Monte Cristo- 1884

HotMopo Report

RaroaRaroa
Community Member
6 months ago

Poor old lady. :-D

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#19

Plz Put This On My Tombstone #submission (The Dogs, Scott Smith)

Plz Put This On My Tombstone #submission (The Dogs, Scott Smith)

menwritewomen Report

Samantha Lomb
Community Member
6 months ago

Barbie doesn't have a vagina. Would anyone describe a man as " Bob- sweet, green eyed bob, with his short red hair, his musky skin and his Ken doll penis"?

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See Also on Bored Panda
#20

*me To My Friend* Excuse Me, May I Please Borrow Your Eyeballs?

*me To My Friend* Excuse Me, May I Please Borrow Your Eyeballs?

menwritewomen Report

Bacony Cakes
Community Member
6 months ago

*brandishes ice cream scoop* Your eyeballs, please.

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#21

She Was Flesh And Blood, Not The 2D Woman He Was Used To Objectifying On Television, And For That She Was All The More Special (A Time On Earth, Vihelm Moberg)

She Was Flesh And Blood, Not The 2D Woman He Was Used To Objectifying On Television, And For That She Was All The More Special (A Time On Earth, Vihelm Moberg)

menwritewomen Report

Stephanie Did It
Community Member
6 months ago

But no head, brain or mouth. How convenient!

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#22

Literally No Woman Would Ever Do This (Misterioso, Arne Dahl)

Literally No Woman Would Ever Do This (Misterioso, Arne Dahl)

menwritewomen Report

Samantha Lomb
Community Member
6 months ago

Well she might if she wants him to go away. And since it appears he is creeping on her in her sleep that might be her goal. The bigger problem appears to be that he feels like he as a right to sex

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#23

Only Sluts Have Hairy Legs (The Things They Carried, Tim O'brien)

Only Sluts Have Hairy Legs (The Things They Carried, Tim O'brien)

menwritewomen Report

Samantha Lomb
Community Member
6 months ago

dry sounds like she just needs to use more lotion. dry skin is horribly itchy

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#24

Thank God For The Bikini Wax.

Thank God For The Bikini Wax.

sausageroll101 Report

Charlotte A.
Community Member
6 months ago

Since when do bruises make your body sexier?

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#25

Wish I Had Pillowy Breasts! Taken From Ben Fountain’s Brief Encounters With Che Guevara

Wish I Had Pillowy Breasts! Taken From Ben Fountain’s Brief Encounters With Che Guevara

inquisitorial_25 Report

Samantha Lomb
Community Member
6 months ago

I'm more concerned by the fact he seems to routinely check out boys' butts and uses that as the benchmark of sexy.

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#26

The Rest Reads “Dad Is Looking Like He Made A Better Decision Every Year”. What?!?

The Rest Reads “Dad Is Looking Like He Made A Better Decision Every Year”. What?!?

sadhairahcaz Report

Samantha Lomb
Community Member
6 months ago

wow that is very Oedipal.

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#27

This Is A Totally Anatomically Normal Thing For Breasts To Do #submission (We Can Remember It For You Wholesale, Philip Dick)

This Is A Totally Anatomically Normal Thing For Breasts To Do #submission (We Can Remember It For You Wholesale, Philip Dick)

menwritewomen Report

Rowlie
Community Member
6 months ago

That nail....

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#28

#menwritingwomen No Wonder Some Of Them Think Our Breasts Stop Us From Doing Stuff If They Think We’re As Obsessed As They Are. We Can’t Get Away From Them. Oh Must Do This Important Thing But Wait!

#menwritingwomen No Wonder Some Of Them Think Our Breasts Stop Us From Doing Stuff If They Think We’re As Obsessed As They Are. We Can’t Get Away From Them. Oh Must Do This Important Thing But Wait!

KathrynEvansInk Report

Samantha Lomb
Community Member
6 months ago

Well this seems to reinforce every ugly stereotype of men being sex crazed horndogs

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#29

'the Shining', By Stephen King. Its Always Breasts

'the Shining', By Stephen King. Its Always Breasts

GodfreyCrane Report

Bacony Cakes
Community Member
6 months ago

Your human disguise doesn't work when you're a goat.

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