Guy Wants To Give Part Of Lottery Winnings To His Ex That Raises Their Kids, His GF Goes Livid
Some say that the love of money is the root of all evil, while others think that it’s the lack of money. No matter which side of the fence you find yourself on (I’m currently balancing on top of it), there’s no denying — financial issues can and do cause very serious arguments.
Usually, arguments start when there’s not enough money to go around. However, one man recently won the lottery and was surprised to find out that it can be the other way around. When Reddit user Binkies123 started planning to give away a large chunk of his winnings to his ex-wife, who is raising their two children, his current girlfriend blew her top.
One Reddit user recently won a huge sum of money
Image credits: 401(K) 2012 (not the actual photo)
Binkies123 shared his worries that he may have acted like a jerk to his girlfriend with the subreddit ‘Am I the A**hole,’ an online community that helps people stuck in dilemmas figure out whether or not they were on the right side of history in a fight. This subreddit has a very large following: 1.1 million people and counting are members.
He then asked the internet whether giving part of his lottery winnings to his ex-wife was the right call
Reddit user Binkies123 explained the whole situation, including how he and his wife got divorced, because he cheated on her with his current girlfriend.
“My ex wife is the mother of my 2 kids. She is an amazing woman and good to the bone. We divorced 6 years ago because I had an affair with my current partner,” Binkies123 wrote online. “I was in a low place in my life and I [messed up]. She was in incredible pain but — like [an effing saint] — she allowed me to still see our kids who mean the world to me, allowed our divorce to be as pain free as possible despite the fact that I know she was hurting. She still is close with my parents. She is respectful to me although she refuses to talk to my gf.”
Binkies123 also mentioned that his ex-wife was one of the first people he phoned after finding out he won the lottery. He then decided to give her a large part of his lottery winnings, for her sake and for their kids’ sake.
However, the moment he told his girlfriend what he was planning to do, she went ballistic, “accusing” him of being “in love” with his ex. She even threatened to leave him. Reddit exonerated Binkies123 and declared that he wasn’t a jerk. But what do you think about the situation? Do you believe Binkies123 acted in the right way? Let us know in the comments section below.
While we should all congratulate Binkies123 on being fortunate enough to win the lottery, we really shouldn’t be jealous of him. Why? Because of a study that was done in 1975.
Researchers measured the amounts of happiness lottery winners and catastrophe survivors got from everyday activities like talking with friends, eating breakfast or getting a compliment. As it turns out, the thrill of winning the lottery doesn’t last long. We get used to being rich. Just as we get used to having been badly hurt in an accident. That means that eventually, no matter how good or bad our luck, we all return to our personal happiness baseline: we end up just as happy as we were before winning the lottery or getting into an accident. Perhaps that’s why Binkies123 had no qualms about his plans to give a significant chunk of his money away?
This is what people said about Reddit user Binkies123’s actions
Helping the mother of YOUR children is a good thing, the soon to be ex GF can go pound sand
Right? Sounds like he found out the hard way that the grass isn't always greener ;)
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That last response is best response. Be single for a while and sort your feelings out.
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Your ex threatening to break up with you if you give your ex the money instead of her, is really her asking you to choose between her and your kids. Which is absolutely disgusting. That in itself is a massive reason to break up with her but you also feel relief when she said she would end things. Let her end things, she's a terrible person.
SERIOUSLY! If I was him I wouldnt of wasted a minute further on this insecure piece of s**t. What kind of a*****e gets mad about their partner helping someone, let alone their own f*****g kids. Omg i want to punch her in the d**k so bad.
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I feel like a lot of these people missed his explanation of why he still loves her. She is the mother of his kids, and to boot takes care of his kids. I think that he is making the right decision. And the gf sounds like a jack***
Well, basically it's like giving alimony to your ex-wife, no? Nothing strange about it. The only difference is that you're not obbligated by law.
More like child support than alimony, which is justified since they have kids together.
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Well, you sure f****d up alright. Going from that pretty damn sweet sounding ex to your pretty damn awful current girlfriend. Give your ex money, and dropkick your current gf without giving her a single cent.
no.. you aint in the wrong. your heart is in the good place. and your girlfriend is a bit too childish dont u think? either talk it out with her or break up. your relationship cant possibly last the long run considering she started threatening like that. no. she is not above your children. she should understand that.
Exactly! The Ex wife and kids are family! He expressed this when he said he called her right after he called his parents. Him doing that also tells me that he knew his gf would give him a hard time over it! Kids eat first!!
Load More Replies... It’s your kid’s parents. I could see if she was just an ex, how wrong that would be. But that’s the mother of his own children. The only other person responsible for keeping the kids. Of course he should give her money. Plus she did nothing wrong. He cheated on her and left her for the other woman. The least he can do is toss her some cash. He owes her. If the circumstances were different, I would understand the girlfriend a little more. Girlfriend needs to learn to shut up and let him spend his money. Most of it will go to girlfriend if she plays her cards right.
I actually cannot believe that this sorry excuse for a woman even had the f*****g nerve to say something about this! She literally has like no place in the matter considering they are a whole separate family. They will be connected FOREVER through their children! What he does with that family is HIS business, and if you are going to be with someond that has a previous family then you need to understand from.the beginning that you have no say in what goes on with them. The fact that there are still females out there with this b******t mentaloty is INFURIATING. And I am a female! Even worse, this guy went to the trouble of asking reddit if he is the a*****e in this situation! This girlfriend needs to GO.
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Hey Miklos, what the hell does being a woman have to do with anything? There are plenty of men that are like the girlfriend as well. You seem like you just really wanted to make a misogynistic comment for the hell of it. Women are not a monolith. We are individual human beings. So stop treating us like we’re all the same.
If you read this comment, sir, I hope you will consider these things: First, congratulations on your windfall! Next, there are a couple things that reveal the true character of a person. One of them is money. It tends to show the weaknesses in some, the selfishness in others, and the selflessness in the rest. And you, good sir, are definitely not a "f*** up" as you put it. This situation is also revealing what kind of person your gf is and I'm afraid you may have to assess what kind of person you want to spend the rest of your life with, money or no. Is this gf the one? Or is it someone else? As for your ex-wife, I say do what is right. No one, but yourself, can make that decision.
This guy is definitely an arsehole for cheating on the mother of his babies. And his gf is also a selfish b***h for carrying on with a married father and then being angry her bf wants to share his winnings with the mother of his children. He should give the money as planned to his ex and ditch the girlfriend. Maybe he'll meet someone who isn't about stealing another woman's husband.
Well I have no sympathy for the current girlfriend at all since she most likely knew that he was a married man when she got with him. So she has no right to be jealous either. But I honestly don’t have much sympathy with him either. If he was unhappy in the marriage he should have just broken up first and not cheat on her.
I don’t necessarily agree with everyone that says he’s still in love with his ex, but you can have love for a person and it not be romantic. However, what he is wanting to do is incredibly humble of him and f*ck the new gf she needs to be kicked to the curb. 6 years and still a gf? You never wanted her to be end game to begin with so let this be your sign. On a side note he cheated on his family yet gets to win the lottery. Isn’t life soooo fair. Smh
I would understand a current wife to be upset, but not a current girlfriend. Especially one that was "the other woman". I think its great he wants to do that...they shared a life together at one point. I would do the same if my husband and I ever left each other because for the past 10 years we talk about how great it would be if we won. I couldn't imagine not giving him a small chunk of my winnings if it happened without him. I know he would do the same. But everyone is different
Wife girlfriend none of that matters, because these 2 people share CHILDREN, which no matter what any currwnt wife or girlfriend says, will NEVER CHANGE and if you can't accept that, then you should not be getting involved with someone that has a previous relationship and kids. Its quote f*****g simple!
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You can tell he still misses his family unit but he isn't wrong for taking care of his kids. His GF has zero legal right to that money because they aren't married. She is being selfish and greedy after helping to destroy a family. I low key hope he leaves the GF and he and his ex wife reconcile, she sounds like a far better person.
that money is viewed as his income. Child support is typically based upon what the 2 parent make as income, how much it costs to raise kids at that income level, with each parent providing a percentage of that total based upon their combined income (ie, Mom makes 50k a year, Dad (prior to lotto win) makes $150k. The court determines with 2 kids, if the parents were still together, would spend $2k on the children a month to raise them. Mom would be responsible for $500 and Dad for $1500, as Dad makes 75% of their total income. Now add the lottery win. The mom could easily take him to court to get a raise in child support. Dad is doing the right thing and avoiding the stress and mess. Time to show the GF the door.
Is this supposed to be noble? He was a cheating sack of feces and the ex is entitled to go to court and get more child support whether he likes it or not. Non-story. Clearly he is still an a*****e needing to turn to the internet for coddling. Take care of your kids and the woman you wronged and shut the f**k up. Attention hungry a*s.
He is a piece of s**t and his current gf is the same type of s**t. No amount of lottery money will change that.
Guy has no financial obligation to GF. They aren't married (and for all anyone knows that may well be her decision) so outside of a common law situation(which is 7+ years, but probably varies from state to state), he owes her nothing. GF knows this. Which is why it is unlikely she will leave. It wouldn't be a surprise if she started acting contrite and apologizing as soon as she realizes he is absolutely adamant about his intentions towards his ex. He doesn't address GF's behavior prior to this, but his relief makes her reaction and threat seem like they verify a negative assessment of their relationship based on prior unpleasant behavior. His situation doesn't entail a legal financial obligation to anyone, although ex could pursue (and probably get) increased child support even if a court had nothing to do with whatever arrangement they have currently... presuming there is one. Not surprised his lawyer "was on board".
The mother has been working extremely hard. It is soo difficult to raise two kids as a single mum in this modern world. She deserves the money, really. The girlfriend is being entitled, selfish, arrogant, disrespectful and entirely evil if you consider the fact that she isn’t raising two kids by herself, while the ex wife is. So the ex wife deserves the money. Also, the girlfriend is assuming she is entitled to your money which is a serious red flag. She doesn’t respect you or your children. Split it between you and ex wife as she is working the hardest out of all 3 of you.
On one hand it's good that he wants to look out for the mother of his kids but he does not sound at all like he's over her so I get where his current GF is coming from and I don't think she's wrong to point out that he still has feeling for her because he clearly does. End of the day I just don't think he's the kind of guy that does right by any of them.
This is insecurity and immaturity at its PEAKKK. She is the mother of his children! Together or not, this will connect them FOREVER. If you start dating someone with an ex and kids and don't realise this, well then you clearly have some issues with insecurity and should NOT be getting into any type of relationship until ypu sort your own s**t out. Omg wtffff
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Sounds like he is in love with his ex-wife and only with the girlfriend because the ex left him. So the girlfriend is going to be upset because their relationship seems to be built on a shaky foundation. Plus the girlfriend knows he cheated on his wife so she also knows he has the potential to cheat on her or leave her. In the end it is the guys money and he can just give more money in child support or give the ex a lump sum. But he has done some emotional damage to both women in this situation. The wife has reason to be upset and so does the girlfriend. Relationships are complicated and you can't expect the girlfriend to not be upset anymore than you could expect the wife to not have left him in the first place.
So he first disrespected his wife and now he's disrespecting the gf. What a talent. Both should ignore him, because he clearly doesn't know where he stands.
The bloke isn't going to win on this one no matter what. BUT i will say if it was the other way around and the ex won the money and wanted to give some to him, though WHY she would is beyond me, I 'd bet the girlfriend would not object.
He doesnt talk with much respect about his current gf. More like he is with her cause his ex dumped him. He even says he still loves his ex and that he feels relieved his gf wants to break up!!! WTF. If youre relieved about that, why dont you break up the relationship yourself? I understands he wants to share his money with his kids (and their mother), but other than that he sounds like a douche.
I'd have lost all respect for my SO too after such a response. I still love all my exes. I would never be back with them, that ship has sailed. But I still love them. He should still break up, if the idea of breaking up was not shocking.
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he doesn't love the current gf nor does he want to keep her, otherwise they would be having a child together by now
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Sounds like he and his girlfriend have been together long enough that their finances are probably entwined. I'd be upset if my financial partner was making huge decisions without me. I would not be upset if it were say, 10 million to us, 1 mil to ex wife, and 5 mil for each of his kids in a trust. It would be an acknowledgement of both the current stage in my life, the importance of my kids future, and being supportive of a good coparent. If he's struggling with thoughts like this, he needs to re-evaluate his current relationship.
If your children are minors I'd set money aside till they are 18-25 or whatever you feel they would benefit best from it. Your ex-wife deserves some money as she does have your kids. I think it is a major red flag that your gf doesn't see it that way, that it is for helping to raise your kids. Buy your gf a new Birkin bag and she will stfu. I'd also get a lawyer and financial advisor, cause if you live with that gf of yours and have millions in your banque account she may be entitled to some of those winnings if she decides to flip script. 1. Children 1st!!!
Does he and the GF have children together? I agree that it was not appropriate to tell the ex first. He should have talked to the GF and be excited together, then tell her you want to set up college accounts for the kids. But then they can go on a trip together. GF is acting like a 2 year old. It's all mixed up. Good luck trying to get it all straightened out.
We all make mistakes, but to cheat on your spouse is horrendous, especially when am there are children, I admire the man for giving his ex and children money, their life will improve, it would take a miracle for the two to get back together, and be a family, I believe it's up to the ex if she can forgive, and still loves him, hope for the children !!!
I hope he realizes his gf is TA in this situation. And runs like hell the other way!
If he is no longer with his ex-wife there is no reason to give her any money. Whatever their previous arrangement was should stay the same, and he SHOULD spend the money on himself and his girlfriend. He is clearly a horrible person for stringing her along anyway. She had a right to scream at him. The poor girl is probably extremely insecure because he clearly loves his ex-wife.
Well, the most important sentence, imo, is how he felt relief about the GFs ultimatum. It sounds like he would like to get rid of his GF and this is a way out. (An odd way out but still seems to work)
Nothing wrong with giving money to his ex and kids but I bet he has more feelings for her than he is admitting to, his current relationship is blatantly on the rocks and this situation will probably be the nudge that is needed for them to break up. He basically admitted that he has been waiting for an excuse to break up with his partner which makes him look like just as much of a douch as her!!
His girlfriend has no place. She knows they are amicable because of the kids, and on top of that, she laid with a married man and now they are divorced. Yes he is at fault too obviously, but he realizes that and has remorse-she does not. She’s an awful human being, which clearly shows since she doesn’t think the mother of these kids deserve some recompense for what THEY put her through. Ridiculous. I’d boot that b***h to the curb in the next county. He obviously is tired of her s**t he needs to tell her to take a hike. Maybe she can find another marriage to ruin. 🤷🏽♀️
What he is doing is right and the gf needs to put a sock in it and remember that she helped break a family apart, can't say it was just her because he is also to blame. She just needs to go kick rocks.
He's doing the right thing by giving the ex some of his winnings, but he needs to break it off with the GF immediately. I doubt she will leave him not that he has all that cash.
First of all, you need to ditch the witch GF. You will have to declare this income anyway, which would greatly alter the amount of child support you are required to pay your ex, which she will have to pay taxes on. I think it's a very wise move to go through an attorney to make sure this is all done in a legal fashion. Your GF is an incredibly insecure & childish individual. Put on your big boy pants and go find an actual adult to spend your time with.
Do for your kids, if that also does for your ex-wife then so be it. You need to have a long heart to heart with the girlfriend.
time for a new girl friend. or to be on your own (your relief when she said that she;s gonna break it off should tell you something, listen to it!! RUN!!!)
Life is complicated but my decision on this is easy. Ditch the girlfriend and pay attention to your ex and your kids. You may be surprised at the outcome. Good luck!.
I have great respect for a man whose first thoughts are his children, and who really wants to make amends for literally f-ing up. Let the girlfriend GO.
Dump the GF. She's always going to be known as the side piece that wrecked your marriage, which you clearly feel guilty about. Time for a getaway with just yourself so you can work out why you can't be alone and figure out what you want. And yes, of course give generously to your ex. I'd be putting it in a trust for them though so they don't come knocking in a few years with their hands out saying they blew it all and now the kids want to go to an ivy league college. It may seem like a lot of money, but it's very finite and goes very quick.
A few people seem to be taking my point completely the wrong way. The entire point I'm trying to make, is to give his ex wife the money for the sole purpose of their children. They're far too young to be given the money directly. I completely agree that a woman shouldn't have access to a man's wallet once they're no longer together, obviously they shouldn't.
Yeah well. Loose the gf, no point being with her if you still love your ex. You're just fking up her life you know, if you didn't get over your marriage. It's another thing wanting to give $ to your kids, they are yours and always will be. But you're being unfair staying with the gf just because your ex divorced you. Gf was a booty call obviously, nothing more, and you're with her only because it got out and you're divorced.
He can't see this but here my opinion! Give the b***h an "break up fee" I'm sure she'll won't be happy but you well be!! Be single on your own!! Not trying to find someone else! The gf is TAH for being that selfish, she's definitely seeing dollar signs now! You know the right thing do to so do it!
if you feel relieved about threats of breaking up... you should break up. also you probably shouldn't have cheated in the first place
This post is INFURIATING. What kind of an insecure jealous a*****e do you have to be to actually get mad about this? SHE IS RAISING THEIR F*****G CHILDREN! This girlfriend needs a good kick in the butt.
Actually, ex-wife could go back & get more child support. I wouldn't ask for child support in my divorce because I would never get it because he usually worked (when he did) under the table. The judge said he wouldn't sign the paperwork unless I asked (although he wouldn't make a judgment that he had to pay), because if he won the lottery or inherited a bunch of money then I wouldn't have as much legal standing to ask later. He's better off doing it this way.
Share it with your x. Screw the gf. Think of what your x could do for your kids with that money. That guy is my kind of man.
Really? He cheated on his ex and he’s “your kind of man”. Yuck
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I would give my ex-wide a sizable portion of the gains (30-50%) in exchange for renouncing the alimony and that would buy my freedom and decrease the risks in the new relationship (that might even end in a marriage) as, apparently, the things are not better. Thus he removes a debt and another risk and wins two pondered relationships.
Dude dump the Gf, mend things with the ex wife. Restart your life the RIGHT WAY. Imagine how happy your kids would be if mom and dad got back together. And all the fun you can do with the money, and college is all set for the kiddos. This isn't a very hard concept to see. I hope you do this and give us an update!
Does depend on the ex wanting him back - though it would be a nice ending.
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I would just make an account for each of the kids and give them a huge sum. I wouldn't bring the ex into it at all. It is a bit disrespectful to the recent gf.
how? It's him trying to make someone he hurt happier
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this wouldn't be a problem if OP just said he's simply giving the money for the sake of his kids and not bring the ex-wife name into the discussion with the current gf
But then he would be telling a false story. Why not be honest if you want honest advice.
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This dude is still holding on to the ex too much and the GF is right to be pissed although it is somewhat poetic considering she is the one he cheated on the ex with. Set up trust funds for the kids. Take your GF on a beautiful trip..problem solved.
whether or not his girlfriend is being childish, the fact that he feels relieved by her threats means it's time to break up. also you left your wife for this woman and yet 6 years later you haven't married her. maybe you know this is not the woman for you long term. so another sign to break up
Anyone want to tell that guy that he has money now... He can do what he wants. Give the mother of your children (which I would totally do) and dump the childish girlfriend. Go lead an extraordinary life. Leave the drama behind.
Where did he say he still wanted to romance his ex? He flat out says they've grown apart and it's NORMAL for him to still care about her, even though they're not together. The GF sounds like a money grubbing jerk. It's time to kick her to the curb. Anyone who screams because he wants to give his kids a better life is human garbage.
I cant believe how many immature people are downvoting this
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Are you fudgin kidding me right now???? SHE IS THE MOTHER OF HIS CHILDREN! Obviously she is going to spend the money on their children! You suck so bad right now
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This is literally a problem that could have happened anywhere and at any time. Definitely NOT a first world problem.
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Helping the mother of YOUR children is a good thing, the soon to be ex GF can go pound sand
Right? Sounds like he found out the hard way that the grass isn't always greener ;)
Load More Replies... That last response is best response. Be single for a while and sort your feelings out.
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Load More Replies... Your ex threatening to break up with you if you give your ex the money instead of her, is really her asking you to choose between her and your kids. Which is absolutely disgusting. That in itself is a massive reason to break up with her but you also feel relief when she said she would end things. Let her end things, she's a terrible person.
SERIOUSLY! If I was him I wouldnt of wasted a minute further on this insecure piece of s**t. What kind of a*****e gets mad about their partner helping someone, let alone their own f*****g kids. Omg i want to punch her in the d**k so bad.
Load More Replies... I feel like a lot of these people missed his explanation of why he still loves her. She is the mother of his kids, and to boot takes care of his kids. I think that he is making the right decision. And the gf sounds like a jack***
Well, basically it's like giving alimony to your ex-wife, no? Nothing strange about it. The only difference is that you're not obbligated by law.
More like child support than alimony, which is justified since they have kids together.
Load More Replies... Well, you sure f****d up alright. Going from that pretty damn sweet sounding ex to your pretty damn awful current girlfriend. Give your ex money, and dropkick your current gf without giving her a single cent.
no.. you aint in the wrong. your heart is in the good place. and your girlfriend is a bit too childish dont u think? either talk it out with her or break up. your relationship cant possibly last the long run considering she started threatening like that. no. she is not above your children. she should understand that.
Exactly! The Ex wife and kids are family! He expressed this when he said he called her right after he called his parents. Him doing that also tells me that he knew his gf would give him a hard time over it! Kids eat first!!
Load More Replies... It’s your kid’s parents. I could see if she was just an ex, how wrong that would be. But that’s the mother of his own children. The only other person responsible for keeping the kids. Of course he should give her money. Plus she did nothing wrong. He cheated on her and left her for the other woman. The least he can do is toss her some cash. He owes her. If the circumstances were different, I would understand the girlfriend a little more. Girlfriend needs to learn to shut up and let him spend his money. Most of it will go to girlfriend if she plays her cards right.
I actually cannot believe that this sorry excuse for a woman even had the f*****g nerve to say something about this! She literally has like no place in the matter considering they are a whole separate family. They will be connected FOREVER through their children! What he does with that family is HIS business, and if you are going to be with someond that has a previous family then you need to understand from.the beginning that you have no say in what goes on with them. The fact that there are still females out there with this b******t mentaloty is INFURIATING. And I am a female! Even worse, this guy went to the trouble of asking reddit if he is the a*****e in this situation! This girlfriend needs to GO.
Load More Replies... Hey Miklos, what the hell does being a woman have to do with anything? There are plenty of men that are like the girlfriend as well. You seem like you just really wanted to make a misogynistic comment for the hell of it. Women are not a monolith. We are individual human beings. So stop treating us like we’re all the same.
If you read this comment, sir, I hope you will consider these things: First, congratulations on your windfall! Next, there are a couple things that reveal the true character of a person. One of them is money. It tends to show the weaknesses in some, the selfishness in others, and the selflessness in the rest. And you, good sir, are definitely not a "f*** up" as you put it. This situation is also revealing what kind of person your gf is and I'm afraid you may have to assess what kind of person you want to spend the rest of your life with, money or no. Is this gf the one? Or is it someone else? As for your ex-wife, I say do what is right. No one, but yourself, can make that decision.
This guy is definitely an arsehole for cheating on the mother of his babies. And his gf is also a selfish b***h for carrying on with a married father and then being angry her bf wants to share his winnings with the mother of his children. He should give the money as planned to his ex and ditch the girlfriend. Maybe he'll meet someone who isn't about stealing another woman's husband.
Well I have no sympathy for the current girlfriend at all since she most likely knew that he was a married man when she got with him. So she has no right to be jealous either. But I honestly don’t have much sympathy with him either. If he was unhappy in the marriage he should have just broken up first and not cheat on her.
I don’t necessarily agree with everyone that says he’s still in love with his ex, but you can have love for a person and it not be romantic. However, what he is wanting to do is incredibly humble of him and f*ck the new gf she needs to be kicked to the curb. 6 years and still a gf? You never wanted her to be end game to begin with so let this be your sign. On a side note he cheated on his family yet gets to win the lottery. Isn’t life soooo fair. Smh
I would understand a current wife to be upset, but not a current girlfriend. Especially one that was "the other woman". I think its great he wants to do that...they shared a life together at one point. I would do the same if my husband and I ever left each other because for the past 10 years we talk about how great it would be if we won. I couldn't imagine not giving him a small chunk of my winnings if it happened without him. I know he would do the same. But everyone is different
Wife girlfriend none of that matters, because these 2 people share CHILDREN, which no matter what any currwnt wife or girlfriend says, will NEVER CHANGE and if you can't accept that, then you should not be getting involved with someone that has a previous relationship and kids. Its quote f*****g simple!
Load More Replies... You can tell he still misses his family unit but he isn't wrong for taking care of his kids. His GF has zero legal right to that money because they aren't married. She is being selfish and greedy after helping to destroy a family. I low key hope he leaves the GF and he and his ex wife reconcile, she sounds like a far better person.
that money is viewed as his income. Child support is typically based upon what the 2 parent make as income, how much it costs to raise kids at that income level, with each parent providing a percentage of that total based upon their combined income (ie, Mom makes 50k a year, Dad (prior to lotto win) makes $150k. The court determines with 2 kids, if the parents were still together, would spend $2k on the children a month to raise them. Mom would be responsible for $500 and Dad for $1500, as Dad makes 75% of their total income. Now add the lottery win. The mom could easily take him to court to get a raise in child support. Dad is doing the right thing and avoiding the stress and mess. Time to show the GF the door.
Is this supposed to be noble? He was a cheating sack of feces and the ex is entitled to go to court and get more child support whether he likes it or not. Non-story. Clearly he is still an a*****e needing to turn to the internet for coddling. Take care of your kids and the woman you wronged and shut the f**k up. Attention hungry a*s.
He is a piece of s**t and his current gf is the same type of s**t. No amount of lottery money will change that.
Guy has no financial obligation to GF. They aren't married (and for all anyone knows that may well be her decision) so outside of a common law situation(which is 7+ years, but probably varies from state to state), he owes her nothing. GF knows this. Which is why it is unlikely she will leave. It wouldn't be a surprise if she started acting contrite and apologizing as soon as she realizes he is absolutely adamant about his intentions towards his ex. He doesn't address GF's behavior prior to this, but his relief makes her reaction and threat seem like they verify a negative assessment of their relationship based on prior unpleasant behavior. His situation doesn't entail a legal financial obligation to anyone, although ex could pursue (and probably get) increased child support even if a court had nothing to do with whatever arrangement they have currently... presuming there is one. Not surprised his lawyer "was on board".
The mother has been working extremely hard. It is soo difficult to raise two kids as a single mum in this modern world. She deserves the money, really. The girlfriend is being entitled, selfish, arrogant, disrespectful and entirely evil if you consider the fact that she isn’t raising two kids by herself, while the ex wife is. So the ex wife deserves the money. Also, the girlfriend is assuming she is entitled to your money which is a serious red flag. She doesn’t respect you or your children. Split it between you and ex wife as she is working the hardest out of all 3 of you.
On one hand it's good that he wants to look out for the mother of his kids but he does not sound at all like he's over her so I get where his current GF is coming from and I don't think she's wrong to point out that he still has feeling for her because he clearly does. End of the day I just don't think he's the kind of guy that does right by any of them.
This is insecurity and immaturity at its PEAKKK. She is the mother of his children! Together or not, this will connect them FOREVER. If you start dating someone with an ex and kids and don't realise this, well then you clearly have some issues with insecurity and should NOT be getting into any type of relationship until ypu sort your own s**t out. Omg wtffff
Load More Replies... Sounds like he is in love with his ex-wife and only with the girlfriend because the ex left him. So the girlfriend is going to be upset because their relationship seems to be built on a shaky foundation. Plus the girlfriend knows he cheated on his wife so she also knows he has the potential to cheat on her or leave her. In the end it is the guys money and he can just give more money in child support or give the ex a lump sum. But he has done some emotional damage to both women in this situation. The wife has reason to be upset and so does the girlfriend. Relationships are complicated and you can't expect the girlfriend to not be upset anymore than you could expect the wife to not have left him in the first place.
So he first disrespected his wife and now he's disrespecting the gf. What a talent. Both should ignore him, because he clearly doesn't know where he stands.
The bloke isn't going to win on this one no matter what. BUT i will say if it was the other way around and the ex won the money and wanted to give some to him, though WHY she would is beyond me, I 'd bet the girlfriend would not object.
He doesnt talk with much respect about his current gf. More like he is with her cause his ex dumped him. He even says he still loves his ex and that he feels relieved his gf wants to break up!!! WTF. If youre relieved about that, why dont you break up the relationship yourself? I understands he wants to share his money with his kids (and their mother), but other than that he sounds like a douche.
I'd have lost all respect for my SO too after such a response. I still love all my exes. I would never be back with them, that ship has sailed. But I still love them. He should still break up, if the idea of breaking up was not shocking.
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he doesn't love the current gf nor does he want to keep her, otherwise they would be having a child together by now
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Sounds like he and his girlfriend have been together long enough that their finances are probably entwined. I'd be upset if my financial partner was making huge decisions without me. I would not be upset if it were say, 10 million to us, 1 mil to ex wife, and 5 mil for each of his kids in a trust. It would be an acknowledgement of both the current stage in my life, the importance of my kids future, and being supportive of a good coparent. If he's struggling with thoughts like this, he needs to re-evaluate his current relationship.
If your children are minors I'd set money aside till they are 18-25 or whatever you feel they would benefit best from it. Your ex-wife deserves some money as she does have your kids. I think it is a major red flag that your gf doesn't see it that way, that it is for helping to raise your kids. Buy your gf a new Birkin bag and she will stfu. I'd also get a lawyer and financial advisor, cause if you live with that gf of yours and have millions in your banque account she may be entitled to some of those winnings if she decides to flip script. 1. Children 1st!!!
Does he and the GF have children together? I agree that it was not appropriate to tell the ex first. He should have talked to the GF and be excited together, then tell her you want to set up college accounts for the kids. But then they can go on a trip together. GF is acting like a 2 year old. It's all mixed up. Good luck trying to get it all straightened out.
We all make mistakes, but to cheat on your spouse is horrendous, especially when am there are children, I admire the man for giving his ex and children money, their life will improve, it would take a miracle for the two to get back together, and be a family, I believe it's up to the ex if she can forgive, and still loves him, hope for the children !!!
I hope he realizes his gf is TA in this situation. And runs like hell the other way!
If he is no longer with his ex-wife there is no reason to give her any money. Whatever their previous arrangement was should stay the same, and he SHOULD spend the money on himself and his girlfriend. He is clearly a horrible person for stringing her along anyway. She had a right to scream at him. The poor girl is probably extremely insecure because he clearly loves his ex-wife.
Well, the most important sentence, imo, is how he felt relief about the GFs ultimatum. It sounds like he would like to get rid of his GF and this is a way out. (An odd way out but still seems to work)
Nothing wrong with giving money to his ex and kids but I bet he has more feelings for her than he is admitting to, his current relationship is blatantly on the rocks and this situation will probably be the nudge that is needed for them to break up. He basically admitted that he has been waiting for an excuse to break up with his partner which makes him look like just as much of a douch as her!!
His girlfriend has no place. She knows they are amicable because of the kids, and on top of that, she laid with a married man and now they are divorced. Yes he is at fault too obviously, but he realizes that and has remorse-she does not. She’s an awful human being, which clearly shows since she doesn’t think the mother of these kids deserve some recompense for what THEY put her through. Ridiculous. I’d boot that b***h to the curb in the next county. He obviously is tired of her s**t he needs to tell her to take a hike. Maybe she can find another marriage to ruin. 🤷🏽♀️
What he is doing is right and the gf needs to put a sock in it and remember that she helped break a family apart, can't say it was just her because he is also to blame. She just needs to go kick rocks.
He's doing the right thing by giving the ex some of his winnings, but he needs to break it off with the GF immediately. I doubt she will leave him not that he has all that cash.
First of all, you need to ditch the witch GF. You will have to declare this income anyway, which would greatly alter the amount of child support you are required to pay your ex, which she will have to pay taxes on. I think it's a very wise move to go through an attorney to make sure this is all done in a legal fashion. Your GF is an incredibly insecure & childish individual. Put on your big boy pants and go find an actual adult to spend your time with.
Do for your kids, if that also does for your ex-wife then so be it. You need to have a long heart to heart with the girlfriend.
time for a new girl friend. or to be on your own (your relief when she said that she;s gonna break it off should tell you something, listen to it!! RUN!!!)
Life is complicated but my decision on this is easy. Ditch the girlfriend and pay attention to your ex and your kids. You may be surprised at the outcome. Good luck!.
I have great respect for a man whose first thoughts are his children, and who really wants to make amends for literally f-ing up. Let the girlfriend GO.
Dump the GF. She's always going to be known as the side piece that wrecked your marriage, which you clearly feel guilty about. Time for a getaway with just yourself so you can work out why you can't be alone and figure out what you want. And yes, of course give generously to your ex. I'd be putting it in a trust for them though so they don't come knocking in a few years with their hands out saying they blew it all and now the kids want to go to an ivy league college. It may seem like a lot of money, but it's very finite and goes very quick.
A few people seem to be taking my point completely the wrong way. The entire point I'm trying to make, is to give his ex wife the money for the sole purpose of their children. They're far too young to be given the money directly. I completely agree that a woman shouldn't have access to a man's wallet once they're no longer together, obviously they shouldn't.
Yeah well. Loose the gf, no point being with her if you still love your ex. You're just fking up her life you know, if you didn't get over your marriage. It's another thing wanting to give $ to your kids, they are yours and always will be. But you're being unfair staying with the gf just because your ex divorced you. Gf was a booty call obviously, nothing more, and you're with her only because it got out and you're divorced.
He can't see this but here my opinion! Give the b***h an "break up fee" I'm sure she'll won't be happy but you well be!! Be single on your own!! Not trying to find someone else! The gf is TAH for being that selfish, she's definitely seeing dollar signs now! You know the right thing do to so do it!
if you feel relieved about threats of breaking up... you should break up. also you probably shouldn't have cheated in the first place
This post is INFURIATING. What kind of an insecure jealous a*****e do you have to be to actually get mad about this? SHE IS RAISING THEIR F*****G CHILDREN! This girlfriend needs a good kick in the butt.
Actually, ex-wife could go back & get more child support. I wouldn't ask for child support in my divorce because I would never get it because he usually worked (when he did) under the table. The judge said he wouldn't sign the paperwork unless I asked (although he wouldn't make a judgment that he had to pay), because if he won the lottery or inherited a bunch of money then I wouldn't have as much legal standing to ask later. He's better off doing it this way.
Share it with your x. Screw the gf. Think of what your x could do for your kids with that money. That guy is my kind of man.
Really? He cheated on his ex and he’s “your kind of man”. Yuck
Load More Replies... I would give my ex-wide a sizable portion of the gains (30-50%) in exchange for renouncing the alimony and that would buy my freedom and decrease the risks in the new relationship (that might even end in a marriage) as, apparently, the things are not better. Thus he removes a debt and another risk and wins two pondered relationships.
Dude dump the Gf, mend things with the ex wife. Restart your life the RIGHT WAY. Imagine how happy your kids would be if mom and dad got back together. And all the fun you can do with the money, and college is all set for the kiddos. This isn't a very hard concept to see. I hope you do this and give us an update!
Does depend on the ex wanting him back - though it would be a nice ending.
Load More Replies... I would just make an account for each of the kids and give them a huge sum. I wouldn't bring the ex into it at all. It is a bit disrespectful to the recent gf.
how? It's him trying to make someone he hurt happier
Load More Replies... this wouldn't be a problem if OP just said he's simply giving the money for the sake of his kids and not bring the ex-wife name into the discussion with the current gf
But then he would be telling a false story. Why not be honest if you want honest advice.
Load More Replies... This dude is still holding on to the ex too much and the GF is right to be pissed although it is somewhat poetic considering she is the one he cheated on the ex with. Set up trust funds for the kids. Take your GF on a beautiful trip..problem solved.
whether or not his girlfriend is being childish, the fact that he feels relieved by her threats means it's time to break up. also you left your wife for this woman and yet 6 years later you haven't married her. maybe you know this is not the woman for you long term. so another sign to break up
Anyone want to tell that guy that he has money now... He can do what he wants. Give the mother of your children (which I would totally do) and dump the childish girlfriend. Go lead an extraordinary life. Leave the drama behind.
Where did he say he still wanted to romance his ex? He flat out says they've grown apart and it's NORMAL for him to still care about her, even though they're not together. The GF sounds like a money grubbing jerk. It's time to kick her to the curb. Anyone who screams because he wants to give his kids a better life is human garbage.
I cant believe how many immature people are downvoting this
Load More Replies... Are you fudgin kidding me right now???? SHE IS THE MOTHER OF HIS CHILDREN! Obviously she is going to spend the money on their children! You suck so bad right now
Load More Replies... This is literally a problem that could have happened anywhere and at any time. Definitely NOT a first world problem.
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