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We have a lot of different types of jokes, fitting for any occasion. Today, however, we will talk about jokes for 5-year-olds. The little ones might often get left out of the conversation regarding jokes, and bad puns beloved by adults just won’t do. But just like the grown-ups, the kids enjoy having a good laugh, and such interactions can only benefit the development of children’s character. So think of this list as a collection of two-liner jokes but for the little ones!

While there are some references to popular kid culture and children's movies (like Frozen), these funny jokes also refer to history, biology, and general knowledge of the world. And that’s why seemingly silly jokes for kids can also be an excellent tool for learning. Hidden under the disguise of comedy, you can gift your children knowledge from an early age. 

However, these short jokes can also help prepare your child for school and introduce essential life skills like communication, creativity, and self-awareness. The latter make up a significant part of one’s life. And while funny jokes for kids might not be directly responsible, it’s a great way to include a child in conversation and kick off their social habits.

But enough with all this seriousness, we’re here to have fun! Dig into this list of jokes for 5-year-olds, and make sure you take notes for later. Making your children laugh must be one of the best feelings in the world, and we sincerely hope this collection of funny puns will allow you to achieve that. Vote for your favorites and share with your family and friends, as perhaps they also need laughter in their lives.

#1

Joke for 5 year olds about Elsa Why shouldn’t you give Elsa a balloon?

Because she’ll “Let It Go”!

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Illustrious G
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

A chance to make my students groan AND I get to sing for them while doing so!? I can’t WAIT to try this joke on them!

#2

Why was the baby in Egypt?

It was looking for its mummy.

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Andre Blue
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Things I've realized my 5 year old doesn't know: That mummies are a burial practice from ancient Egypt and not just occasional cartoon heels.

#3

What do you call a bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear!

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#4

Why did the math book look so sad?

Because it had so many problems!

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#5

Joke for 5 year olds about teapot What word starts with the letter t, ends with the letter t, and has t in it?

A teapot!

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#6

What did one eye say to the other eye?

Between us, something smells.

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How do you find some easy-to-understand jokes for 5-year-olds?

Adults' sense of humor can be vastly different than that of kids. Simple jokes for 5-year-olds just won’t hit the spot for us. And it might be a bit hard to understand what makes them laugh and what just flies over their heads. And that’s absolutely normal! Our understanding of the world grows over time, and it’s no wonder we view everything around us at an early age differently.

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The key to collecting a great series of jokes that would make your kids laugh is simple. Put yourself in their shoes and remember your own childhood. What sort of things made you laugh? Was it an unexpected noise, a person being goofy, or some silly knock-knock jokes? The key is to be simple, remove all the difficulties of the adult universe, and just appreciate the world as it is.

#7

Which hand is better to write with?

Neither. It’s better to write with a pencil!

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#8

What kind of music do balloons hate?

Pop music.

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andreblue avatar
Andre Blue
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Things I've realized my 5 year old doesn't know: I have neglected to explain the concept of music genres to my tiny human with barely any executive brain function. Even if she was fully developed brain-wise it still doesn't make any sense.

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#9

What kind of witch can you find at the beach?

A sand-witch!

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#10

Joke for 5 year olds about cows Where do cows go on Friday nights?

To the mooooo-vies!

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Bethany Grinnell
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I told this one to my older sister and I started cracking up to the point where I couldn't breathe BHAHAHAHAHAHA

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#11

Why do sharks swim in saltwater?

Because pepper water makes them sneeze!

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#12

What do you call two banana peels?

A pair of slippers!

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Andre Blue
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Things I've realized my 5 year old doesn't know: That banana peels are, according to the oldest cartoons, are the slipperiest things ever.

With so many jokes for kids, how do you choose the best one?

When picking the best of the bunch, consider whether it’s age-appropriate, and remember that your goal is to entertain a kid. So if you’re a father, your usual, genetically embossed spicy dad jokes just won’t do, unfortunately.

Your task is simple—make your kids laugh so hard that they’ll get so tired that they’ll go straight to nap time. But it’s not only that; these jokes for 5-year-olds should also work as a tool for academic and general education. It might not seem like it at first, but we’re sure your kid will remember the laughing sessions for a long time and whatever life skills you gave them in humor form.

#13

Why do hummingbirds hum?

Because they don’t know the words!

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#14

Why do birds fly south in the winter?

Because it’s too far to walk!

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#15

Joke for 5 year olds about hot and cold Which is faster? Hot or cold?

Hot. You can easily catch a cold.

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#16

How do they answer the phone at the paint store?

Yellow!

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#17

What is a cat's favorite color?

Purrr-ple!

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#18

Who won the race of princesses?

Rapunzel, by a hair!

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Andre Blue
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Things I've realized my 5 year old doesn't know: What "by a hair" means. And I do not spare the old colloquialisms.

#19

What do you call a boomerang that won't come back?

A stick.

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#20

Joke for 5 year olds about monsters What’s a monster’s favorite game?

Swallow the leader!

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#21

What is a pirate’s favorite letter?

Arrrrrr!

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#22

Why didn’t the teddy bear want dessert?

Because he was stuffed!

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#23

Why did Mickey Mouse go up in space?

To find Pluto!

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Andre Blue
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Things I've realized my 5 year old doesn't know: That Pluto is a cartoon dog in addition to a disenfranchised planetessimal.

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#24

What do elves learn at school?

The elf-abet!

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#25

Joke for 5 year olds about horse Where do you take a sick horse?

To the horse-pital!

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#26

What do you call a pig that knows karate?

A pork chop!

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Andre Blue
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Things I've realized my 5 year old doesn't know: What a "karate chop" is.

#27

What do you get when you shake a cow?

A milkshake!

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#28

Why did the bee get married?

Because she found her honey!

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Andre Blue
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Things I've realized my 5 year old doesn't know: That "honey" is a cute, diminutive name for someone's partner.

#29

Where do eskimo pigs live?

In pig-loos!

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Andre Blue
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Things I've realized my 5 year old doesn't know: Neither what an Eskimo is or that that's not really what they're called.

#30

Joke for 5 year olds about gum Why did the gum cross the road?

It was stuck to the chicken’s foot!

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#31

Why are seagulls called seagulls?

Because if they flew over the bay, they'd be bagels!

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#32

How do you fix a cracked pumpkin?

With a pumpkin patch!

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#33

Where do hamburgers go dancing?

A meat ball!

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Andre Blue
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Things I've realized my 5 year old doesn't know: What a "ball" is.

#34

Why did the jelly wobble?

Because it saw the milk shake!

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#35

Joke for 5 year olds about bat What animal is always at a baseball game?

A bat.

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#36

Why can’t Elsa have a balloon?

Because she will let it go.

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#37

Which vegetable do sailors hate the most?

Leeks!

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#38

What do sprinters eat before a race?

Nothing. They fast!

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#39

Why did the invisible man turn down the job offer?

Because he couldn’t see himself doing it.

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#40

Knock knock joke for 5 year olds Who’s there?

Ice cream.

Ice cream who?

ICE CREAM SO YOU CAN HEAR ME!

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#41

Why can't you play hockey with pigs?

They always hog the puck.

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Andre Blue
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Things I've realized my 5 year old doesn't know: What hockey is or the phrase "hogging the..."

#42

What does every birthday end with?

The letter Y.

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#43

What’s yellow and looks like pineapple?

A lemon with a new haircut.

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#44

What do you call a gorilla with bananas in its ears?

Anything you like, he can’t hear you.

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#45

Joke for 5 year olds about color red What is red and smells like blue paint?

Red paint.

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#46

What do you call cheese that’s not yours?

Nacho cheese!

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#47

What did the mommy tomato say to the baby tomato?

C’mon, ketchup!

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#48

Why did the banana go to the doctor?

Because he wasn’t “peeling” well!

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#49

Why didn’t the skeleton go to the dance?

Because he had no body to go with!

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#50

Joke for 5 year olds about egg What happens when an egg laughs?

It cracks up!

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#51

Why can’t you tell a joke while ice skating?

Because the ice might crack up!

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#52

What’s mommy and daddy’s favorite ride at the carnival?

A married-go-round!

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#53

How did Cookie Monster feel after eating all the cookies?

Pretty crummy!

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Andre Blue
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Things I've realized my 5 year old doesn't know: That "crummy" means "not great or bad".

#54

What did the cookie say to the annoying cookie?

Crumb on!

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#55

Joke for 5 year olds about Olaf What does Olaf eat for lunch?

Icebergers!

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#56

Why do giraffes have long necks?

Because they have smelly feet!

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#57

What goes black, white, black, white, bump?

A penguin falling down the stairs!

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#58

What animal needs to wear a wig?

A bald eagle!

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#59

Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!

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#60

Joke for 5 year olds about squirrel How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut!

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#61

Where do eskimo pigs live?

In pig-loos!

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Andre Blue
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When I was in high school in the late 90s my friends and I would skip school and hang out at the local college campus. Our cover story was that we were Eskimologists. But we promptly switched to Inuit studies majors when we realized we were being ignorant.

#62

Why did the man run around his bed?

Because he was trying to catch up on his sleep!

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#63

Can a kangaroo jump higher than the Empire State Building?

Of course! The Empire State Building can’t jump!

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#64

What can you catch but not throw?

A cold!

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#65

Joke for 5 year olds about winter What falls in winter but never gets hurt?

The snow!

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#66

What did one plate say to the other?

Dinner is on me!

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andreblue avatar
Andre Blue
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Things I've realized my 5 year old doesn't know: What "on me" means.

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#67

How do you make a lemon drop?

Just let go of it!

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#68

What did the traffic light say to the truck?

Don’t look! I’m changing!

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#69

What is the witch’s favorite school subject?

Spelling!

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#70

Joke for 5 year olds about haircuts What kind of haircuts do bees get?

Buzzzzcuts!

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Andre Blue
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Things I've realized my 5 year old doesn't know: What a buzz-cut is. Kids in her class either have hair or a thin blue line.

#71

Where do pencils go for vacation?

Pencil-vania.

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#72

What kind of shoes do spies wear?

Sneakers!

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#73

What musical instrument is found in the bathroom?

A tuba toothpaste.

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#74

What time do you go to the dentist?

At tooth-hurty!

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#75

Joke for 5 year olds about school Why did the boy bring a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school.

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#76

Why should you not talk to circles?

Because there is no point!

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#77

Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

In case he got a hole in one!

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#78

What did the hat say to the scarf?

You stay here I’ll go ahead!

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#79

Why does a penguin carry a fish in its beak?

Because it doesn’t have pockets!

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#80

Joke for 5 year olds about monsters What do sea monsters eat?

Fish and ships!

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#81

Why did the student eat his homework?

Because the teacher told him it was a piece of cake!

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#82

How do they keep the basketball arena cool?

They fill it with fans!

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#83

Why was the computer cold?

It left its window open!

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andreblue avatar
Andre Blue
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Things I've realized my 5 year old doesn't know: This. And she can navigate a computer pretty well already.

#84

What happened when the skunk was on trial?

The judge declared, "Odor in the court, odor in the court!"

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Andre Blue
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Things I've realized my 5 year old doesn't know: That "order in the court" is a thing or how courts work. Am I doing something wrong? I let her watch law and order but my wife got mad at me.

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#85

Joke for 5 year olds about owl Who was that owl who did all the tricks?

Who-dini.

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Andre Blue
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Things I've realized my 5 year old doesn't know: Who Houdini even is. Although I'm glad my kid doesn't remember some weird past life I guess? Or is overly interested in stage magic?

#86

How do you fix a broken tomato?

With a can of tomato paste.

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Andre Blue
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Things I've realized my 5 year old doesn't know: That paste is a glue thing and some of her friends' parents definitely ate it. A lot.

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#87

Why was the rabbit happy?

Because somebunny loved him!

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#88

"Knock knock!"

"Who’s there?"

"Cow."

"Cow who?"

"Cows don’t say who, they say moooo!"

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#89

What is the name of the Dutch pig who was famous for painting sunflowers and cutting off his ear?

Vincent van Hog.

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Andre Blue
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Things I've realized my 5 year old doesn't know: Who the Dutch and Van Gough are. That's on me.

#90

Joke for 5 year olds about hair How do bees brush their hair?

They use honeycombs.

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#91

What goes “tick, woof, tick woof”?

A watch dog.

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#92

Do you want to hear a joke about a pizza?

Never mind, it’s too cheesy!

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Andre Blue
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Things I've realized my 5 year old doesn't know: What "cheesy" implies.

#93

Why don’t polar bears eat penguins?

Because they can’t get the wrappers off.

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Andre Blue
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Things I've realized my 5 year old doesn't know: Why I don't get this joke.

#94

What goes "Ha ha ha..... THUD!"?

A monster laughing his head off.

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#95

Joke for 5 year olds about lying guy What do you call a guy lying on your doorstep?

Matt.

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#96

How do you make a tissue dance?

Put a little boogie in it!

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#97

What did one snowman say to the other?

Do you smell carrots?

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#98

What does one eye say to the other eye?

Something between us smells.

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#99

What do you call a train that sneezes?

Achoo-choo train!

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#100

Joke for 5 year olds about ocean and airplane What did the ocean say to their airplane?

Nothing, it just waved!

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#101

Why did the crab go to jail?

Because he kept pinching things!

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Andre Blue
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Things I've realized my 5 year old doesn't know: That "pinching" is a euphemism for stealing.

#102

What do you call a skunk who flies in a helicopter?

A smelly-copter!

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#103

What do you call an eagle at the bay?

A bay-gull!

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#104

"Knock! Knock! Who’s there?"

"Kanga."

"Kanga who?"

"Actually, it’s kangaroo."

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#105

Joke for 5 year olds about elephant How do you know if there’s an elephant under your bed?

Your head hits the ceiling!

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#106

What do you call the horse that lives next door?

Your neighbor!

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#107

After many years, a prisoner is finally released.
He runs around yelling, "I'm free! I'm free!"
A little kid walks up to him and says, "So what? I'm 4."

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#108

What do you get on every birthday?

A year older!

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#109

What do you give a sick bird?

TWEETment!

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#110

Joke for 5 year olds about fish in a tank Two fish are in a tank.

One says to the other ‘Do you know how to drive this thing?’

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#111

How does a cucumber become a pickle?

It goes through a jarring experience.

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#112

What stays in the corner yet can travel all over the world?

A stamp.

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Andre Blue
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Things I've realized my 5 year old doesn't know: Stamps. Oh God I'm failing her.

#113

What does a rain cloud wear under her dress?

Thunderwear!

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#114

Joke for 5 year olds about days What day of the week are most twins born on?

Twos-day!

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#115

Joke for 5 year olds about deer What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No eye-deer.

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#116

Why do scissors always win a race?

Because they take a shortcut!

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#117

How do cats bake cake?

From scratch.

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#118

What did the basketball say to the hoop when it missed?

Oh shoot!

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#119

Why do bees hum?

They’ve forgotten the words.

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#120

Joke for 5 year olds about fish and elephant What do you get if you cross a fish with an elephant?

Swimming trunks.

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#121

What do kittens like to eat?

Mice cream.

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#122

What do you call a fish with no eyes?

A fsh.

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#123

What is red and smells like blue paint?

Red paint.

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#124

What does a piece of toast wear to bed?

His pa-JAM-as!

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#125

Joke for 5 year olds about stick What is brown and sticky?

A stick!

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#126

What letter is always wet?

The C!

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#127

How can you tell if someone is a good farmer?

He is outstanding in his field!

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#128

How many apples grow on a tree?

All of them!

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#129

What do you call bears with no ears?

B.

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#130

Joke for 5 year olds about vegetables What did the salad say to the carrot after it lost the fight?

You've lettuce down.

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