Bezos’ Space Launch Turned Into A Massive Joke Online, Here Are 40 Of The Best Jokes And Memes
Amazon founder and billionaire Jeff Bezos successfully rocketed up more than 65 miles on Tuesday, and declared that the event had made for his "Best day ever."
Bezos, his brother Mark, aeronautics legend Wally Funk and 18-year-old Oliver Daemen flew on a New Shepard rocket, landing safely in the West Texas desert after a trip of more than eight minutes.
It's just my guess, but I think Bezos may have been blasting Bo Burnham during the flight: "Come on, Jeffrey, you can do it / Pave the way, put your back into it / Tell us why, show us how / Look at where you came from, look at you now."
True, Bezos didn't actually "pave the way": he was the second billionaire businessman to head to space, with Virgin Galactic's Richard Branson beating him by 9 days, but his trip has inspired just as many memes and jokes. Here are some of the funniest ones
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Disgusting amount of greed. He stomped on so many people to create his wealth.
Yes. Gimme libraries. And also open hospitals and education centres.
Or the Williamsburg Historic Village, or the Monterey Bay aquarium. A Hewlett Packard founder funded the Monterey Aquarium, which revitalized tge Monterey economy, educated the public, funded marine research, gave the public some fun, and gave Mr. Packard a chance to bum rides on deep-sea research vessels. Nobody makes memes mocking Packard!
or.. take an artist of some kind as a house pet (looking at you Venice)
Yeah instead he's helping pioneer exploration. The same exploration that generated the tech that made your computer, cel phone and wifi possible, you idiot.
Yeah instead he's helping pioneer exploration. The same exploration that generated the tech for your computer and cel phone, you idiot.
May be he could have learned to treat his staff a bit better. Whadda ya say Jeffey BOY!!!!!!!
Yesssss, I remember those old good times too. They get together and give a concert for the victims of...
The post-flight briefing was shown a video of the occupants performing somersaults and tumbles during four minutes of weightlessness.
Stunning views of the Earth could be seen outside — the crew travelled in a capsule with the biggest windows flown in space, offering stunning views of the Earth.
Jeff Bezos was surprised by the sensation of microgravity: "It felt so normal," he said.
Funk added: "It was great, I loved it, I can hardly wait to go again." In the 1960s, she was one member of a group of women called the Mercury 13. They underwent the same screening tests as male astronauts, but never got to fly under the US national space program.
Eventually, Bezos also revealed what the astronauts spoke about as they were in the capsule ahead of the launch; he told his crewmates that the flight was not just about "adventure" but also the start of "something big."
"What we're doing is the first step of something big, and I know what that feels like, I did it three decades ago, nearly three decades ago, with Amazon," Bezos said. "Big things start small, but you can tell when you're onto something, and this is important."
"We're going to build a road to space so that our kids and their kids can build the future, and we need to do that, we need to do that to solve the problems here on Earth,” Bezos added. “This is not about escaping Earth."
Have no line for women toilet? That's something I never saw.
"I see that Jeff Bezos has made it into space astride his giant phallic rocket. The massive bell-end made it safely back to Earth by parachute, along with the rest of the capsule. Just waiting for the Austin Powers inspired memes now. 😉" It didn't take long, and I'm not disappointed. :D
The billionaire said Earth is "the only good planet" in our solar system, and "we've sent robotic probes to all of them."
"When you go to space and see how fragile it is, you want to take care of it even more, and that's what this is about," he explained.
Bezos estimated that Blue Origin has already approached some $100 million in private ticket sales.
While building space infrastructure will take decades, Bezos believes that "This is how it starts."
The memers, however, seem to disagree.
He was only in space 10 minutes. I think he went before he left home.
I wonder if this will cause insecure men everywhere to strap enormous phalluses to their absurdly lifted trucks, badly tuned motorcycles and excessively loud sports cars?
Shoulda kept him there for 16 hours and having to pee really badly the whole time!
The fact he had the audacity to thank us confirms he’s a narcissistic sociopath. Does he actually think that’s how we wanted him to spend his money? Is he really that out of touch?
Maybe next time we’ll blast them into space, but without the rockets.
If Jeff Bezos Launched His Rocket In Japan (Fixed)
Would that he had done so, using this method. Maybe next time his own employees will rise up and make it happen. Then they can bring his ex-wife in to take over running the company, or make it an employee-owned corporation.
Note: this post originally had 41 images. It’s been shortened to the top 40 images based on user votes.
It definitely shows billionaires are not taxed enough.
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branson begs the gov for cash in 2020, goes to space in 2021 and we're supposed to go well thats good, meanwhile bezos treats his staff like crap and musk threatens to fire people if they dont come to work during a governmemnt mandated lockdown and somehow we're supposed to think these 3 tax dodgers are people to look up to? well screw them, I respect the flat earth guy that died a couple of years ago more
I don't mind Jeff Bezos going into space at all. It's the thought of him coming back that troubles me.
Sadly this doesn't indicate how better and cheaper space technology got, but how much the wealth gap has gotten. Private people as rich as entire nations.
Shocking waste of resources. The future shouldn’t be in space, it should be unfucking the Earth and living more sustainably. I don’t suppose that’s in the interests of men who have made their billions based on consumerism.
What the actual F? Actually going to space in a d**k for NO REASON while people are starving because they cannot afford to live with the wages they are given while working for most of their day? Is this a dystopian novel? I seriously can't believe this is actually real. Why won't he share money with anyone? Why not donate to good causes that could save lives? Why not increase workers' wages? F**k you, Bezos.
You wonder if the penis shape was done on purpose. Not by Bezos, but by the engineers that worked with him. Like when Phil Donahue had the editor for The Enquirer on his show...the make up crew made him look like Mimi from the Drew Carey Show. A subtle "F*** You!"
It was the unfortunate combination of the booster having a maximum diameter determined by what could be moved by truck, and the capsule needing to have maximum internal volume relative to the aerodynamic stability of its shape. The "flare" beneath the capsule is actually a very complex piece of aerodynamic engineering which stabilizes the booster during its descent. It serves a similar function to the grid fins on a SpaceX rocket.
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To say the least... Sure rockets always look somewhat like d***s, but this is pushing it.
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Aliens: we find a flat round shape is ideal for space travel, it can hover and change directions well. Humans: but that won’t look like my d**k at all!
Yes Jeff, we know you the biggest d*ck now. Now go back to destroying bookstores and exploiting your workers.
These things are not men they are users they use us and the government for their own amusement and they use us to make money. If they weren't rich they would probably be weaving baskets in an asylum somewhere. They waste money like they waste humans and they don't care.
In all fairness, I think Branson at least had the best approach by using a plane in the first stage rather than a rocket
Branson has been planning this since at least the 90's before Amazon was even a thing. Of the three of them I have the least disdain for him because this is at least part of his established publicity method. The other two are the ones going "quick, let's jump on this bandwagon and do it bigger and better coz we're richer and more important". I'm fully expecting Elon's rocket to look like the accompanying pair of b0llocks to Bozo's shaft
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bp did we need to shear off precisely one post so this could be an even 40
I would love to go there, how cool is that, I have always wanted to go to space for as long as I can remember. I just couldn't afford the cost of going though and not sure if there is an age limit or not. I Can dream. X x
I wouldn’t mind trying it myself but it’s like $500,000 total. Hopefully the price comes down in the next few years.
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I expected Musk to pull this crap and have all the deek jokes flood his Twitter feed. Guess he doesn't get that dishonor now, still was the biggest waste of time and money I've seen to date. I betcha all the astronauts that actually left Earth are laughing at him and his giant boner, knowing that he only reached the tip and had to pull out so soon...I have no regrets over that statement. Kiss my tail, Bezos!
The kids on BP are sure jealous today. I read through these with a little cheese to go along with the whine. Wouldn't it be great if you did one damn thing to help out the world instead of bitching?
Wonder what it is you're doing to better the world? Your views and opinions certainly do not bring much to the table.
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The starting wage for an Amazon employee is $15 an hour. How much more do you want someone to get paid to put items In a box and tape it closed?
The problem with working for Amazon is not the pay, it's the way the employees are being abused. They get docked if they're not meeting the hourly quota of boxes filled, they get docked if they take too long on break to go to the bathroom, and you don't even want to know what happens if they get hurt, or have a heart attack on the job. And there are cameras everywhere, even in their delivery trucks, watching them.
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As a newly minted “rich” person, I disagree so much. You’re thinking of it wrong. These guys aren’t just rich. Rich is just basically being an average millionaire. These guys are billionaires. And it makes logical sense to detest what billionaires do, just simply based on the exploitation alone. Poor people are wrong to lump it all together. Rich people pay taxes. Mega rich and billionaires don’t. And no, none of the people you’re talking about would give their fortunes away. Or they’d never amass them. The more money you make, the more guarded and cold you have to become. It’s the nature of things. Unless you win the lottery but that barely counts.
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It's good bet that Brett owns copies of The Protocols Of The Elders Of Zion and The Turner Diaries.
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It definitely shows billionaires are not taxed enough.
Load More Replies... branson begs the gov for cash in 2020, goes to space in 2021 and we're supposed to go well thats good, meanwhile bezos treats his staff like crap and musk threatens to fire people if they dont come to work during a governmemnt mandated lockdown and somehow we're supposed to think these 3 tax dodgers are people to look up to? well screw them, I respect the flat earth guy that died a couple of years ago more
I don't mind Jeff Bezos going into space at all. It's the thought of him coming back that troubles me.
Sadly this doesn't indicate how better and cheaper space technology got, but how much the wealth gap has gotten. Private people as rich as entire nations.
Shocking waste of resources. The future shouldn’t be in space, it should be unfucking the Earth and living more sustainably. I don’t suppose that’s in the interests of men who have made their billions based on consumerism.
What the actual F? Actually going to space in a d**k for NO REASON while people are starving because they cannot afford to live with the wages they are given while working for most of their day? Is this a dystopian novel? I seriously can't believe this is actually real. Why won't he share money with anyone? Why not donate to good causes that could save lives? Why not increase workers' wages? F**k you, Bezos.
You wonder if the penis shape was done on purpose. Not by Bezos, but by the engineers that worked with him. Like when Phil Donahue had the editor for The Enquirer on his show...the make up crew made him look like Mimi from the Drew Carey Show. A subtle "F*** You!"
It was the unfortunate combination of the booster having a maximum diameter determined by what could be moved by truck, and the capsule needing to have maximum internal volume relative to the aerodynamic stability of its shape. The "flare" beneath the capsule is actually a very complex piece of aerodynamic engineering which stabilizes the booster during its descent. It serves a similar function to the grid fins on a SpaceX rocket.
Load More Replies... To say the least... Sure rockets always look somewhat like d***s, but this is pushing it.
Load More Replies... Aliens: we find a flat round shape is ideal for space travel, it can hover and change directions well. Humans: but that won’t look like my d**k at all!
Yes Jeff, we know you the biggest d*ck now. Now go back to destroying bookstores and exploiting your workers.
These things are not men they are users they use us and the government for their own amusement and they use us to make money. If they weren't rich they would probably be weaving baskets in an asylum somewhere. They waste money like they waste humans and they don't care.
In all fairness, I think Branson at least had the best approach by using a plane in the first stage rather than a rocket
Branson has been planning this since at least the 90's before Amazon was even a thing. Of the three of them I have the least disdain for him because this is at least part of his established publicity method. The other two are the ones going "quick, let's jump on this bandwagon and do it bigger and better coz we're richer and more important". I'm fully expecting Elon's rocket to look like the accompanying pair of b0llocks to Bozo's shaft
Load More Replies... bp did we need to shear off precisely one post so this could be an even 40
I would love to go there, how cool is that, I have always wanted to go to space for as long as I can remember. I just couldn't afford the cost of going though and not sure if there is an age limit or not. I Can dream. X x
I wouldn’t mind trying it myself but it’s like $500,000 total. Hopefully the price comes down in the next few years.
Load More Replies... I expected Musk to pull this crap and have all the deek jokes flood his Twitter feed. Guess he doesn't get that dishonor now, still was the biggest waste of time and money I've seen to date. I betcha all the astronauts that actually left Earth are laughing at him and his giant boner, knowing that he only reached the tip and had to pull out so soon...I have no regrets over that statement. Kiss my tail, Bezos!
The kids on BP are sure jealous today. I read through these with a little cheese to go along with the whine. Wouldn't it be great if you did one damn thing to help out the world instead of bitching?
Wonder what it is you're doing to better the world? Your views and opinions certainly do not bring much to the table.
Load More Replies... The starting wage for an Amazon employee is $15 an hour. How much more do you want someone to get paid to put items In a box and tape it closed?
The problem with working for Amazon is not the pay, it's the way the employees are being abused. They get docked if they're not meeting the hourly quota of boxes filled, they get docked if they take too long on break to go to the bathroom, and you don't even want to know what happens if they get hurt, or have a heart attack on the job. And there are cameras everywhere, even in their delivery trucks, watching them.
Load More Replies... As a newly minted “rich” person, I disagree so much. You’re thinking of it wrong. These guys aren’t just rich. Rich is just basically being an average millionaire. These guys are billionaires. And it makes logical sense to detest what billionaires do, just simply based on the exploitation alone. Poor people are wrong to lump it all together. Rich people pay taxes. Mega rich and billionaires don’t. And no, none of the people you’re talking about would give their fortunes away. Or they’d never amass them. The more money you make, the more guarded and cold you have to become. It’s the nature of things. Unless you win the lottery but that barely counts.
Load More Replies... It's good bet that Brett owns copies of The Protocols Of The Elders Of Zion and The Turner Diaries.
Load More Replies... 