Mother Of 3 Posts About How Her Husband Goes Hunting Twice A Week, So She Decides To Start ‘Hunting’ Herself
Relationships are all about compromise, support, and giving (not just taking). Most couples learn that eventually. They can tell you that things tend to work out when both partners give each other enough time to recharge from taking care of the family all the time.
That’s exactly the type of relationship that mother of three kids Jentri Gilbert Nelson has with her husband Adam. They both need time to themselves. So while her husband goes hunting for deer, ducks, and turkey, she goes ‘hunting’ herself. And by that, she means that she relaxes, reads a book, takes a bath, and has some well-deserved ‘me’ time. Don’t worry, dear Pandas, Jentri doesn’t hurt any animals when she goes ‘hunting!’
Bored Panda spoke to Jentri about her marriage, the dynamic of her relationship with Adam, the importance of mental health, some of the misunderstandings her post created, and about what she’d tell other couples and moms to improve their lives. Scroll down for the full exclusive interview.
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Jentri Gilbert Nelson told the internet what ‘hunting’ time means for her
Image credits: jentri.nelso
Image credits: jentri.nelso
“My husband and I have worked hard to create a balance in our marriage. We try to successfully balance time—work time, time with our children, time with each other, and alone time,” Jentri told Bored Panda.
“As a mother, I always felt guilty about taking time to myself. However, as my job became more demanding, I realized that if I didn’t take time to unwind by myself, I wouldn’t be the kind of wife, mother, and lawyer that I want to be. That realization is where my ‘hunting’ time began.”
She continued: “The day I wrote the Facebook post, I was sitting in the bathtub. I had just told my husband that I needed some ‘hunting’ time. I was thinking about how silly it is that I call my downtime ‘hunting,’ but also about how very important the time is to me—how necessary it is to my mental health. I thought that I would share a quick Facebook post that might encourage other moms to enjoy ‘me’ time without feeling guilty. Moms wear so many hats. Sometimes you need to take every one of those hats off and just be. Just be—in the tub, reading a book, real hunting, working out—whatever you want to do.”
“Relax and be,” she summed up her advice to moms.
Jentri and Adam have 3 kids
Image credits: jentri.nelson
Jentri explained that her husband needs “his real hunting” just as much as she needs her ‘hunting.’
“He is also an attorney. He works hard to provide for our family. He does most of the cooking. He helps me keep the house clean, changes diapers, gives baths, kisses boo-boos, reads stories, and gives bottles. He loves me and our children more than anything. I would never want to deny him his passion of hunting when he is such a wonderful father and husband,” Jentri told us how much of a great human being Adam is.
The couple love and support each other unconditionally
Image credits: jentri.nelson
In Jentri’s opinion, relationships and marriage are about learning to compromise. She stressed just how important that really is. “Marriage is about give and take. You have to learn how to share both the responsibilities and the fun. Otherwise, it can lead to fights and bitterness. Give each other room to breathe.”
According to Jentri, Adam is a wonderful husband and father
Image credits: jentri.nelson
But how did the internet react to Jentri’s Facebook post about ‘hunting?’ “The internet reaction has been mostly positive. I have had many women tag their husbands and say things like ‘I’m going golfing’ and ‘I’m going to the gym.’ Many couples commented that they hadn’t thought of that type of compromise, which really made me happy. I’d like to think my post impacted some of those people in a significant way.”
However, there were some people who weren’t happy about the post, too. “There were some negative comments—mostly from people making assumptions. It is interesting that several people thought they were getting a full view of my marriage from one Facebook post, rather than the tiny glimpse that it really was.”
“Some people are upset that I don’t cook. Apparently, because I’m a woman, I need to get my bottom in the kitchen and whip up some pies. I can assure you that my husband is a fantastic cook, and he enjoys cooking. I would put his cooking against any woman I know, including my mother and mother-in-law (sorry mom and Stacey), and they are wonderful cooks.”
Compromise is incredibly important in relationships, according to Jentri
Image credits: jentri.nelson
There were even more misunderstandings! “For some reason, some people thought that I only get two nights alone per month. Others thought that my husband hunts for days and weeks at a time. I can assure you that I get alone time often. My husband hunts usually two days per week, and he rarely stays overnight away from home.”
“I honestly stopped reading the comments because some of them were so ugly,” Jentri noted. “The internet can be an ugly place. People are hiding behind keyboards and feel like they can say anything. I wish they would be more aware of the effect their words have on the writer. Above all else, I try to be kind.”
Most people on Facebook thought that Jentri was making a good point about couples
Their relationship works for them, their way of living together works for them. Great, marvellous, fantastic. There are about a 100 million couples that have found other sweet, adorable, funny, loving ways to live happily together. But not everyone thinks it is necessary to "share" it on social media. And I thank them for it.
I don't mind people sharing marriage tips -- it might help others. In this case, the couple is an example of compromise, acceptance and fairness. At the very least, their story made me smile, which puts me in a good mood. (No issue with bad news, but I don't mind a story that makes me smile)
Load More Replies...It should never be okay to hunt for sports; never! But if this man is hunting to feed his family, it's no difference than going to the butcher to buy your meat. My apologies to any vegetarians out there.
Load More Replies...What I don't understand about hunters is do they actually enjoy pointing a gun at an animal and killing it?
John, they sure do. They would like to kill their fellow human beings as well if the penalties weren't too stiff.
Load More Replies...Her husband is away two whole days a week (killing things) when he has three children? And he thinks that's fair? Wow
Certainly not fair to innocent, sentient animals.
Load More Replies...Okay, this comment isn't about the "he vs. me, or the "his time vs my time." As someone who loves animals, wildlife, birds… I have to say, how can it be okay that your guy likes to kill things for fun? When children are small and kill things, we see them as budding psychopaths. Why is it different when they're older? I know it sounds judgemental, but there is something SERIOUSLY wrong when someone who is not hungry, someone who does not have to kill to feed their family, goes out to kill other living beings just for the fun of it.
No it's not judgmental it's wright on. "As long as man continues to be the ruthless destroyer of lower beings, he will NEVER know HEALTH or PEACE. For as long as men massacre animals, they WILL kill each other. Indeed, he who sows the seed of murder and pain cannot reap joy and love." - Pythagoras, Greek mathematician & philosopher (? - 497 BC/BCE)
Load More Replies...Here I was thinking the article was going to be about a moral objection to hunting.
He "has" to kill living creatures? As a so-called sport, with his big man guns? Yuck
We do this - my husband goes kayaking with the lads for a week each year, then takes my sons camping for a week so I can have a week's 'mummy' holiday.
Just's husband is perfectly understanding, fair, good husband and father...... figures, he does not murders animals for fun.
Load More Replies...Stop killing animals for fun. And also, keep your private life to yourself, cause revealing such "universal" truths isn;t anything interesting... Come'on BP give us some CONTENT not...this.
What I don’t understand is how people who are dead certain that hunters only hunt because they enjoy killing, never address the possibility that livestock farmers might also enjoy their work. Is being dependent on Big Agra okay because beef and pork are prepackaged, and you don’t often see steaks or cows in proximity the way you see hunters and deer interacting?
Load More Replies...I find this interesting, she takes the time for herself, only when "she really needs it, or she wouldn't ask". Generally, once a month. Whereas he goes out twice a week? I understand that people have passions, but with young kids, some things do need to change or be adjusted... I still see the scales are uneven. Just my two cents, it's working for them so who am I to say!
Yes, the scales are horribly uneven for suffering animals.
Load More Replies...It sounds like these people have learned to accept eachother as they are and thrive. Good for them.
When I met my husband I thought "flying kites" was a metaphor. Nope - he's a National Kite Flying Champion. And I love being able to tell him to "go fly a kite". I have a life, things to do, books to read, s**t to organize - GO
Its so important as a couple to ensure you both get free time for self care, hobbies, and to relax.
And to be able to kill things two days a week. Important!
Load More Replies...So he goes hunting twice a week (for several hours I guess?) but you take a bath twice a month so it's ok? Not great at math, are you? Also how can you trust someone who enjoys killing? Disturbing.
I, actually, got something very different from this then most people seem to have gotten. I thought that " going hunting " was a way to get out of the house for awhile not necessarily to go hunting but to get away. When she told him she was going hunting she said he smiled knowing full well she was not going hunting but wanted/needed to get away. I am no expert on hunting but I am not sure if there is game all year round to hunt legally. I think it is their code for saying I need some time to myself. Again it is just my take on this story.
It works for them. I only question her use of the word "lets" rather than accepts. Lets implies hubs is giving permission, not getting its her equivalent to his time off.
We all need a little hunting time :) you cann tell theyre a strong couple. I don't necessarily agree with hunting...but that's a whole different story.
I though it will be a trashy post how bad this guy is and please to read a wonderful love story
My takeaway from this is that every movie ever made about lawyers just starting out has been a lie. I was under the impression they worked 80 hours a week for little pay, kind of like intern doctors. I guess new lawyers actually have oodles of free time and live well. Who knew?
Wow. A big ol' post about how if one half of the couple is allowed me time/a hobby, so should the other half. Groundbreaking.
Forget hunting ... this is about being equals and everyone getting their "time out" from duties.
A human family affair that goes out and kills members of other families. Super. How wholesome.
Load More Replies...Their relationship works for them, their way of living together works for them. Great, marvellous, fantastic. There are about a 100 million couples that have found other sweet, adorable, funny, loving ways to live happily together. But not everyone thinks it is necessary to "share" it on social media. And I thank them for it.
I don't mind people sharing marriage tips -- it might help others. In this case, the couple is an example of compromise, acceptance and fairness. At the very least, their story made me smile, which puts me in a good mood. (No issue with bad news, but I don't mind a story that makes me smile)
Load More Replies...It should never be okay to hunt for sports; never! But if this man is hunting to feed his family, it's no difference than going to the butcher to buy your meat. My apologies to any vegetarians out there.
Load More Replies...What I don't understand about hunters is do they actually enjoy pointing a gun at an animal and killing it?
John, they sure do. They would like to kill their fellow human beings as well if the penalties weren't too stiff.
Load More Replies...Her husband is away two whole days a week (killing things) when he has three children? And he thinks that's fair? Wow
Certainly not fair to innocent, sentient animals.
Load More Replies...Okay, this comment isn't about the "he vs. me, or the "his time vs my time." As someone who loves animals, wildlife, birds… I have to say, how can it be okay that your guy likes to kill things for fun? When children are small and kill things, we see them as budding psychopaths. Why is it different when they're older? I know it sounds judgemental, but there is something SERIOUSLY wrong when someone who is not hungry, someone who does not have to kill to feed their family, goes out to kill other living beings just for the fun of it.
No it's not judgmental it's wright on. "As long as man continues to be the ruthless destroyer of lower beings, he will NEVER know HEALTH or PEACE. For as long as men massacre animals, they WILL kill each other. Indeed, he who sows the seed of murder and pain cannot reap joy and love." - Pythagoras, Greek mathematician & philosopher (? - 497 BC/BCE)
Load More Replies...Here I was thinking the article was going to be about a moral objection to hunting.
He "has" to kill living creatures? As a so-called sport, with his big man guns? Yuck
We do this - my husband goes kayaking with the lads for a week each year, then takes my sons camping for a week so I can have a week's 'mummy' holiday.
Just's husband is perfectly understanding, fair, good husband and father...... figures, he does not murders animals for fun.
Load More Replies...Stop killing animals for fun. And also, keep your private life to yourself, cause revealing such "universal" truths isn;t anything interesting... Come'on BP give us some CONTENT not...this.
What I don’t understand is how people who are dead certain that hunters only hunt because they enjoy killing, never address the possibility that livestock farmers might also enjoy their work. Is being dependent on Big Agra okay because beef and pork are prepackaged, and you don’t often see steaks or cows in proximity the way you see hunters and deer interacting?
Load More Replies...I find this interesting, she takes the time for herself, only when "she really needs it, or she wouldn't ask". Generally, once a month. Whereas he goes out twice a week? I understand that people have passions, but with young kids, some things do need to change or be adjusted... I still see the scales are uneven. Just my two cents, it's working for them so who am I to say!
Yes, the scales are horribly uneven for suffering animals.
Load More Replies...It sounds like these people have learned to accept eachother as they are and thrive. Good for them.
When I met my husband I thought "flying kites" was a metaphor. Nope - he's a National Kite Flying Champion. And I love being able to tell him to "go fly a kite". I have a life, things to do, books to read, s**t to organize - GO
Its so important as a couple to ensure you both get free time for self care, hobbies, and to relax.
And to be able to kill things two days a week. Important!
Load More Replies...So he goes hunting twice a week (for several hours I guess?) but you take a bath twice a month so it's ok? Not great at math, are you? Also how can you trust someone who enjoys killing? Disturbing.
I, actually, got something very different from this then most people seem to have gotten. I thought that " going hunting " was a way to get out of the house for awhile not necessarily to go hunting but to get away. When she told him she was going hunting she said he smiled knowing full well she was not going hunting but wanted/needed to get away. I am no expert on hunting but I am not sure if there is game all year round to hunt legally. I think it is their code for saying I need some time to myself. Again it is just my take on this story.
It works for them. I only question her use of the word "lets" rather than accepts. Lets implies hubs is giving permission, not getting its her equivalent to his time off.
We all need a little hunting time :) you cann tell theyre a strong couple. I don't necessarily agree with hunting...but that's a whole different story.
I though it will be a trashy post how bad this guy is and please to read a wonderful love story
My takeaway from this is that every movie ever made about lawyers just starting out has been a lie. I was under the impression they worked 80 hours a week for little pay, kind of like intern doctors. I guess new lawyers actually have oodles of free time and live well. Who knew?
Wow. A big ol' post about how if one half of the couple is allowed me time/a hobby, so should the other half. Groundbreaking.
Forget hunting ... this is about being equals and everyone getting their "time out" from duties.
A human family affair that goes out and kills members of other families. Super. How wholesome.
Load More Replies...
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