Woman Perfectly Explains Consent In One Hilarious Analogy So That All Men Can Finally Understand It
You aren’t one of those people who think someone can ever be responsible for being raped or assaulted. You know that no one is ever actually ‘asking for it.’ You know that rape is always the fault of the rapist. But there are some people who haven’t quite figured it out yet. Addressing them, London-based comedian Alice Brine penned a witty analogy, and it perfectly highlights the stupidity of victim blaming.
While it is a serious topic, Brine’s text is as clever as it is funny and has amassed over 200,000 likes and 95,000 shares on Facebook. “At the time [of the post] there was a cricket player in New Zealand who was in the spotlight for sexual assault,” she told Bored Panda. “The media was blowing up with headlines like ‘She said no, but did she mean it?’ Even one publication went as far as to say “She told him she was on the pill, so how could it be rape?” I got so frustrated seeing all those headlines and wrote the status.”
“I find that the post starts trending again <…> when there is a particular event happening that it relates to,” Alice added. “Right nowI’mm getting tagged in a lot of retweets about a US senator that not too many people are happy with…”
The comedian thinks that victim blaming is a huge worldwide problem. “It’s not a bunch of people shouting loudly at all, it’s embedded into the fragments that build our society.”
And the academia agrees with her. One theory suggests that this kind of victim blaming is inherently human. It’s called the just-world bias and was first formulated by Melvin Lerner in the early 1960s. After his original experiments, Lerner suggested that seeing innocent people getting hurt with no resolution of the situation violates the observers’ sense of the world as just.
“There’s just this really powerful urge for people to want to think good things happen to good people and where the misperception comes in is that there’s this implied opposite: if something bad has happened to you, you must have done something bad to deserve that bad thing,” Sherry Hamby, a professor of psychology at Sewanee University said. “We want to think that if we do the right thing, it’s all going to be OK. It’s threatening to see other people not be OK, so we want to come up with an explanation of why that experience won’t happen to us.”
Scroll down to read Alice’s analogy and tells us what you think in the comments.
More info: Facebook
New Zealand comedian Alice Brine had been sick and tired of victim blaming when it comes to rape or sexual assault
Image credits: Alice Brine
So she wrote this analogy to prove that no one is ever ‘asking for it’
Image credits: Alice Brine
Applauding her wit, over 201,000 people have already liked her post
P.S. Alice has one more message. “Is there literally anyone reading this in London who will give me a comedy gig? Please book me.”
I was just wondering do we need to see all these "omg gurl you're so right!" -comments integrated in the post? I mean, they rarely add anything and there's a comment section right here.
I read some of the comments. That was such an easy analogy and yet some people STILL try to argue against it. What is so hard to understand?!
They've probably done something they might be prosecuted for. That's the only reason I can think of.
Load More Replies...Yeah and hate the "women never say what they want" stereotype too. From my experience - even when we do, most men just don't listen. Because they don't want to. I really don't see what's so difficult about the meaning of the one-syllable word that we all learn to use at about 1,5 years old...
Women never say what they want? Maybe. But we ALWAYS say what we DON'T want. *high five*
Load More Replies...That's what I am always saying! The fact that people get raped or robbed means there is something wrong with people who rape or rob. A human being should be able to walk the street drunk and naked and NOT BE TOUCHED!!! Everyone should be able to keep their houses/cars open and not be robbed. If you lose your phone/wallet/anything, you should be able to go to the same spot and find it UNTOUCHED. The fact that we have to be careful not to get raped/robbed/murdered/beaten means there is something terribly wrong with the society. NEVER blame the victim.
That is a brilliant analogy. Ladies. Please correct me if I am mistaken in any part of my understanding. When women wear skimpy clothes, they do it to suit their mood and to feel sexy. (So I understand). This is for their pleasure, not the men's. So no, if they get raped, they are NOT "asking for it", and being drunk is no excuse. Ever.
And here i am trying to hit those like button and then realizing it's not even facebook. -_- But I am agree with her 100% this is supposed to be the easieag analogy there is..
"So that men can finally understand it." STOP. THEY DO UNDERSTAND IT. STOP PANDERING TO THEM PLAYING STUPID. It's not our damn job to "teach" them human decency. They understand it, they just don't care.
Apparently ALL men have no idea what "No" means is such a hoot. Oh how funny...(cough) If I wrote the same thing about a woman, I would be labeled sexist because women don't do that sort of thing. Well, just because female-on-male rape is about 53% of male-on-female rape doesn't mean it doesn't happen. Joking about ANY rape is ridiculous.
Sounds like you made up that stat because RAINN keeps track of ALL rape
Load More Replies...I'm not sure why this is necessary? I don't think the issue behind consent is what the word "No" means.. that is pretty clearly rape? I'm confused why it's titled as "perfectly explains consent" so "men can finally understand" - it literally only explained the meaning of "No" (which is important.. but this post was her beating a dead horse). I think an analogy that accurately showed how lack of consent does not imply consent would have been more useful and um.. praiseworthy?
I would rather see her get away with that. This whole story, really, should not have a need to be on here. Put simply, it should not happen!
Anyone else notice the shown FB comments where they missed the whole point of Alice Brine's analogy* - which is brilliant - seem to be male? (ZOOM!) *analogy - a comparison between two things, typically for the purpose of explanation or clarification.
Weird way to compare but sure...However lets say the victim, a lady, is wearing a short skirt and rocking a cleavage, no it doesn't mean she's asking for it in any way, but apperently guys are thick like that and thinks so, but lets put the truth out there, women are also sexual beings and lets turn the tables, a man is shirtless, the ladies like what they see, they cannot however touch him without consent, but, HE'S ASKING FOR IT??? right? Being shirtless and all? So what would the difference between short skirts and cleavage be to being shirtless, neither should be unconsentually touched and neither are asking for it, however I think a shirtless man is better comparison.
Face argument: "Insurance companies blame me if I get my stuff stolen." Yes, but th eCOPS and COURTS and SOCIETY at large don't. THey say, "Geez, that could happen to anyone, sucks, wow, awful." Oh, an dnobody insures you against RAPE to replace what's lost --- wouldn't that be a nice mriacle? Ai-yi-yi!
Oh my gooood, how many times are people gonna explain consent in some kind of BRILLIANT or GENIUS way?? Enough already! People get it. Unfortunately a lot of people just don't care about consent. It's not that they don't understand it, they are just heaps of human c**p.
If you don't think this applies to you because you get it and u deserved what consent is, feel free to not click on an article like this
Load More Replies...This is not an analogy, it's a fallacy. This implies that all acts or allegations of 'no consent' with regards to sexual assault is a premeditated act by the accuser, which just ins't true.
There's a BIG problem with this "just world bias." It's 100% Bull. There is no such thing as justice or fairness in this world. Otherwise, how do you explain that children get terminal cancer. Did they do something to deserve that. Or why do people minding their own business get killed by drunk drivers? This notion just DOES NOT stand to water.
It boggles the mind that some people don't understand the concept of consent- I can only assume that those same people are indeed f*cking r******d.
Won't happen because to join the Supreme Court you have to make sure that what you're hearing makes sense in order to give it the thumbs up. This analogy does not fit. It's illogical so a real court Justice would laugh it out of court.
Load More Replies...Oh no, she never gave consent, just shared a cab with him, led him back to hers, opened the door, undressed herself and invited him to bed. But she never SAID it...
If a man finds and unconscious woman and rapes her he will likely get away with it. But if he takes here wallet he might be in trouble. I guess it's because the wallet didn't consent.
No one takes a person home expecting they'll stal from them. No one goes to a persons home home expecting the man will just do gangham style for them and call it a night. The issue is expectation in taking someone home and them accepting. She shud have said I'll be taking men to their homes, not going home WITH. taking them implies carrying them into the car, etc while they are unaware they're in the presence of anyone else going home
Oooooooh my god. It just hit me. I can't believe how completely and utterly r******d this girl is. So they will "finally understand"? Seriously? She's trying to compare drunk sex, to STEALING s**t from guys? Are you serious? Sex is something that two people do WITH each other and rape is when one person decides to do it TO another. There are MANY situations where sex is good. In fact, the vast majority of sex is good and enjoyed, more or less, by both parties. BUT THERE IS NO SITUATION (okay, insurance fraud maybe) WHERE SOMEONE STEALING YOUR S**T IS GOOD! This...the fact that she thinks this "shows them" or "puts them in their place" is idiotic in and of itself. Holy jesus...why don't people think of these things?
I agree with the part that consent is needed. I myself had several guys in my life who literally tried talk me into anything, for hours. But this issue will always have same aspects that will divide people. Firstly, MEN also get raped.. What about them? Let's not pretend women are always the weakest. Second situation is when a spouse wants a divorce and will say in court that their better half has raped them. This will always will be questionable, because of some people who would lie about such a thing, so the ones who really get into such a situation, will not be believed. Last but not least, what about those 13 year old, looking like 16, having no freaking clue what sex consists of, they tease men, even have sex with them and then when their parents find out, of course want to take that man to court, while they maybe should have thought also on raising their sweet daughter so that they wouldn't want to got to clubs in heels at that age!
I understand this. But the people who had stuff stolen because they were drunk are also often victim blamed, like "So someone stole your wallet and phone at the bar? You should blame yourself - you were too drunk".
The problem is people like you making jokes.no what if that drunk guy said yes yes take all my s**t I want you to have it so bad. Then in the morning he is embarrassed he gave you all his stuff and realizes you are not coming back to get more stuff from him so out of shame and humiliation he reports that you stole it all. Now without any proof or evidence of what happened ,just his word you are convicted and life destroyed.you now have to register as a thief and shamed more all because someone felt ashamed and embarrassed about giving their stuff away to someone that only wanted stuff.
So you're saying a woman simply existing is the same as someone flashing money in a fancy car around a bunch of people? What the actual f**k.
Load More Replies...It's not supposed to be funny, it's trying to send a message to dumbasses like you. And if you don't like it, DON'T CLICK ON IT! Problem solved!
Load More Replies...What? It's not saying that women don't go out/dont have one night stands...what does that have to do with rape. Nobody wants to raped...
Load More Replies...Please do tell us where exactly it says every man is a rapist? If you already understand the concept of consent, then you can skip this part, but to deny victims are still blamed is just plain idiotic
Load More Replies...Glad you caught the most important part of the post.
Load More Replies...You need consent explained to you? You must be a rapist.
Load More Replies...I'm sure even the Republican Party are against rape, right? How is this the Democrat Party talking points?
Load More Replies...I was just wondering do we need to see all these "omg gurl you're so right!" -comments integrated in the post? I mean, they rarely add anything and there's a comment section right here.
I read some of the comments. That was such an easy analogy and yet some people STILL try to argue against it. What is so hard to understand?!
They've probably done something they might be prosecuted for. That's the only reason I can think of.
Load More Replies...Yeah and hate the "women never say what they want" stereotype too. From my experience - even when we do, most men just don't listen. Because they don't want to. I really don't see what's so difficult about the meaning of the one-syllable word that we all learn to use at about 1,5 years old...
Women never say what they want? Maybe. But we ALWAYS say what we DON'T want. *high five*
Load More Replies...That's what I am always saying! The fact that people get raped or robbed means there is something wrong with people who rape or rob. A human being should be able to walk the street drunk and naked and NOT BE TOUCHED!!! Everyone should be able to keep their houses/cars open and not be robbed. If you lose your phone/wallet/anything, you should be able to go to the same spot and find it UNTOUCHED. The fact that we have to be careful not to get raped/robbed/murdered/beaten means there is something terribly wrong with the society. NEVER blame the victim.
That is a brilliant analogy. Ladies. Please correct me if I am mistaken in any part of my understanding. When women wear skimpy clothes, they do it to suit their mood and to feel sexy. (So I understand). This is for their pleasure, not the men's. So no, if they get raped, they are NOT "asking for it", and being drunk is no excuse. Ever.
And here i am trying to hit those like button and then realizing it's not even facebook. -_- But I am agree with her 100% this is supposed to be the easieag analogy there is..
"So that men can finally understand it." STOP. THEY DO UNDERSTAND IT. STOP PANDERING TO THEM PLAYING STUPID. It's not our damn job to "teach" them human decency. They understand it, they just don't care.
Apparently ALL men have no idea what "No" means is such a hoot. Oh how funny...(cough) If I wrote the same thing about a woman, I would be labeled sexist because women don't do that sort of thing. Well, just because female-on-male rape is about 53% of male-on-female rape doesn't mean it doesn't happen. Joking about ANY rape is ridiculous.
Sounds like you made up that stat because RAINN keeps track of ALL rape
Load More Replies...I'm not sure why this is necessary? I don't think the issue behind consent is what the word "No" means.. that is pretty clearly rape? I'm confused why it's titled as "perfectly explains consent" so "men can finally understand" - it literally only explained the meaning of "No" (which is important.. but this post was her beating a dead horse). I think an analogy that accurately showed how lack of consent does not imply consent would have been more useful and um.. praiseworthy?
I would rather see her get away with that. This whole story, really, should not have a need to be on here. Put simply, it should not happen!
Anyone else notice the shown FB comments where they missed the whole point of Alice Brine's analogy* - which is brilliant - seem to be male? (ZOOM!) *analogy - a comparison between two things, typically for the purpose of explanation or clarification.
Weird way to compare but sure...However lets say the victim, a lady, is wearing a short skirt and rocking a cleavage, no it doesn't mean she's asking for it in any way, but apperently guys are thick like that and thinks so, but lets put the truth out there, women are also sexual beings and lets turn the tables, a man is shirtless, the ladies like what they see, they cannot however touch him without consent, but, HE'S ASKING FOR IT??? right? Being shirtless and all? So what would the difference between short skirts and cleavage be to being shirtless, neither should be unconsentually touched and neither are asking for it, however I think a shirtless man is better comparison.
Face argument: "Insurance companies blame me if I get my stuff stolen." Yes, but th eCOPS and COURTS and SOCIETY at large don't. THey say, "Geez, that could happen to anyone, sucks, wow, awful." Oh, an dnobody insures you against RAPE to replace what's lost --- wouldn't that be a nice mriacle? Ai-yi-yi!
Oh my gooood, how many times are people gonna explain consent in some kind of BRILLIANT or GENIUS way?? Enough already! People get it. Unfortunately a lot of people just don't care about consent. It's not that they don't understand it, they are just heaps of human c**p.
If you don't think this applies to you because you get it and u deserved what consent is, feel free to not click on an article like this
Load More Replies...This is not an analogy, it's a fallacy. This implies that all acts or allegations of 'no consent' with regards to sexual assault is a premeditated act by the accuser, which just ins't true.
There's a BIG problem with this "just world bias." It's 100% Bull. There is no such thing as justice or fairness in this world. Otherwise, how do you explain that children get terminal cancer. Did they do something to deserve that. Or why do people minding their own business get killed by drunk drivers? This notion just DOES NOT stand to water.
It boggles the mind that some people don't understand the concept of consent- I can only assume that those same people are indeed f*cking r******d.
Won't happen because to join the Supreme Court you have to make sure that what you're hearing makes sense in order to give it the thumbs up. This analogy does not fit. It's illogical so a real court Justice would laugh it out of court.
Load More Replies...Oh no, she never gave consent, just shared a cab with him, led him back to hers, opened the door, undressed herself and invited him to bed. But she never SAID it...
If a man finds and unconscious woman and rapes her he will likely get away with it. But if he takes here wallet he might be in trouble. I guess it's because the wallet didn't consent.
No one takes a person home expecting they'll stal from them. No one goes to a persons home home expecting the man will just do gangham style for them and call it a night. The issue is expectation in taking someone home and them accepting. She shud have said I'll be taking men to their homes, not going home WITH. taking them implies carrying them into the car, etc while they are unaware they're in the presence of anyone else going home
Oooooooh my god. It just hit me. I can't believe how completely and utterly r******d this girl is. So they will "finally understand"? Seriously? She's trying to compare drunk sex, to STEALING s**t from guys? Are you serious? Sex is something that two people do WITH each other and rape is when one person decides to do it TO another. There are MANY situations where sex is good. In fact, the vast majority of sex is good and enjoyed, more or less, by both parties. BUT THERE IS NO SITUATION (okay, insurance fraud maybe) WHERE SOMEONE STEALING YOUR S**T IS GOOD! This...the fact that she thinks this "shows them" or "puts them in their place" is idiotic in and of itself. Holy jesus...why don't people think of these things?
I agree with the part that consent is needed. I myself had several guys in my life who literally tried talk me into anything, for hours. But this issue will always have same aspects that will divide people. Firstly, MEN also get raped.. What about them? Let's not pretend women are always the weakest. Second situation is when a spouse wants a divorce and will say in court that their better half has raped them. This will always will be questionable, because of some people who would lie about such a thing, so the ones who really get into such a situation, will not be believed. Last but not least, what about those 13 year old, looking like 16, having no freaking clue what sex consists of, they tease men, even have sex with them and then when their parents find out, of course want to take that man to court, while they maybe should have thought also on raising their sweet daughter so that they wouldn't want to got to clubs in heels at that age!
I understand this. But the people who had stuff stolen because they were drunk are also often victim blamed, like "So someone stole your wallet and phone at the bar? You should blame yourself - you were too drunk".
The problem is people like you making jokes.no what if that drunk guy said yes yes take all my s**t I want you to have it so bad. Then in the morning he is embarrassed he gave you all his stuff and realizes you are not coming back to get more stuff from him so out of shame and humiliation he reports that you stole it all. Now without any proof or evidence of what happened ,just his word you are convicted and life destroyed.you now have to register as a thief and shamed more all because someone felt ashamed and embarrassed about giving their stuff away to someone that only wanted stuff.
So you're saying a woman simply existing is the same as someone flashing money in a fancy car around a bunch of people? What the actual f**k.
Load More Replies...It's not supposed to be funny, it's trying to send a message to dumbasses like you. And if you don't like it, DON'T CLICK ON IT! Problem solved!
Load More Replies...What? It's not saying that women don't go out/dont have one night stands...what does that have to do with rape. Nobody wants to raped...
Load More Replies...Please do tell us where exactly it says every man is a rapist? If you already understand the concept of consent, then you can skip this part, but to deny victims are still blamed is just plain idiotic
Load More Replies...Glad you caught the most important part of the post.
Load More Replies...You need consent explained to you? You must be a rapist.
Load More Replies...I'm sure even the Republican Party are against rape, right? How is this the Democrat Party talking points?
Load More Replies...
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