Hey Pandas, let’s try a new kind of “Ask Pandas”! I want everyone here to post a problem, then people in the comments can provide solutions! This will be like a Bored Panda advice column. I hope we can make this work!

#1

I am not unhappy about going into my eighth decade, because I am healthy and still take care of my home and hearth. However, I am a wee bit distressed that my body does not always obey my orders as it once did. Arms, hands, back, brain have all developed intermittent weakness and lack of civility. However, I still adhere to the old credo "the more you do, the more you can do". Also love "never walk slow when you can walk fast".

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#2

Why is there so much people who discriminate others?

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#3

My brother has been taking 2 hour long naps everyday after finishing homework, then going to bed early and sleeping the entire time. My mom took him to get a blood test after she learned this. Why did she do this? Should I be concerned?

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#4

hey pandas, i need some help. how do i get rid of a toxic friend? i am too nice to say goodbye but my real friends tell me that she is toxic and i should stop being her friend. what should i do??

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#5

How do I tell my family that I don’t feel comfortable around men and would prefer a female-female relationship?

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#6

I can never do anything right. Everything results in self-blame. I feel as if everything would be better if I was gone. I feel like I'm suffocating. I need help but I don't know how to ask. Does needing help make you weak? How do I stop feeling like a burden to everyone around me?

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#7

Ok so if anyone who is struggling rn reads this, try Kooth it's a website where you can anonymously have 1-1 discussions with councillors and you can also talk to children and teens your own age about your problems that they might have too. No, I'm not posting this to get fame coz i work there. I do not work for them. I'm only posting this coz they have helped me out soo much recently and I thought maybe they can help u too. I'm also here for u if u need to talk to someone, you are not alone. Stay safe xxx

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#8

I am currently out of the closet as lesbian, to exactly three people. I have this friend, like my best friend, who I came out to, but it went south, fast. She ended up not liking that about me, and is distancing herself from me, and like downplaying my best qualities because I am attracted to girls, and she told a lot of other people about it, and I live in this really religious, small community. She even told my friend who told their bus. Now some other friends of mine have stopped talking to me. What do I do? Please help!

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#9

I have to hide who I am in my own house. Mostly my parents. My sister will use my correct name and pronouns but my brother doesn't understand my parent pretend i'm not gay. I'm also a cosplayer-ish and my parent think it weird and don't talk about it much. I can't share my opinions with them because I know they won't understand. I go to therapy but I want your opinions on what to do. Please help me, I hurts to only be half of myself.

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#10

I push down my feelings and barely cry. When I do it's by myself and I try to be as quiet as I can. I don't know why because I want to get help, I want to be able to get better but I don't want people to worry about me. It's a never ending cycle and I'm really tiered of it. I don't know what to do.

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#11

Um hi, pandas I have a Friend that is apart of a 3 friend group: me her and my other friend. She frequently gets snappy and annoyed at me for silly reasons. Should I cut ties or be bffs with her and forgive her?? And also Do you know how to get over a fear of flying animals cuz I am scared of all flying animals like bees and wasps and including butterflies

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#12

I'm really confused about my sexual orientation but I have no way of figuring it out that I would be comfortable with. I'm just really not sure who I like or anything like that. Please pandas, how did you know you were bi/gay/lesbian?

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#13

My problem is that I can not post anything in the comments. Whenever I try to, it just says "In order to comment your account must be approved by BoredPanda staff."

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#14

Here is another big problem. I really, really, really love animals. For like when I was younger, I started to get depressed because I didn't have a pet. I used to visit my cousin's dog like every 2 weeks and if we didn't go, I would start to cry and feel so lonely and depressed. I would feel way more anger if a dog got abused than if an adult died. I have a dog now, Loki who is the best but why do I love animals so much?

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#15

Everything/everyone good in my life (which isn't much) gets completely ruined by my brain. I have such negative thoughts about everything, and I get exponentially more negative thoughts when I actively try to think of something positive. I tried medication for years, and it seemed to make things worse, because my life seems to be a lot better now that I'm not taking them. (If what I'm saying sounds bad now, trust me, it was a lot worse) I also tried therapy for years, didn't work. I am seeing a new therapist, I am expecting things will go well until this one breaks my trust, just like all the others. Anyway, not sure how to make things better for myself. Advice is appreciated.

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#16

I'm too scared to come out but I want to really bad but I don't know how.

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#17

I have a crush on this girl. I tried to ask her out once but that failed and she doesn't even know about it. I'm to scared to ask her out in person. My plan is to ask her out the day before Christmas break, with a note on a candycane. What do ya'll think and do you have any other ideas?

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#18

how can i fall asleep easier? recently i have had trouble with falling asleep does anyone know how to help?

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#19

How do I tell if a guy likes me? I have a slight crush but can’t tell if he likes me back

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#20

How do I become less gullible. (I don't know what word to put here). It doesn't matter what someone does to me, I will still forgive them. How do i stop this, I dont want to get taken advantage of.

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#21

Ok so I'm not fat ik that but I'm now constantly aware of what I eat, and I'm trying to eat more healthy good. The reason I'm so aware of what I eat is because my mum keeps saying I'm too skinny and she needs to fatten me up and I don't need too much exercise (I've been trying to exercise more). I think my mum thinks I'm anorexic or something and she's been giving me more chocolate. She puts four chocolate bars in my lunchbox every day and crisps too and extra large portions of food at dinner. When I'm at school I share the chocolate with my friends but they all think I'm obsessed with food and they don't believe me when I say it's my mum putting them in. I feel if I say anything to my mum she'll make me see a therapist or something which I don't want to do coz there's nothing wrong with me. Plz help xoxo

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#22

I lost my job due to health reason and now couse of covid I can't find anything. Tried to open etsy shop but there is very little views, what should I do to get more visibility on the internet? If I'm not going to sell anything I think we are going to live on the streets...

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#23

Got a 4-month old Belgian Malinois girl here, she knows how to sit, thinks everything is a toy if it’s close enough to her face, and will use anything as a reward. Pretty calm puppy, doesn’t bark, but nips and bites at my legs if I walk too fast or she’s all hyper. Solutions to nipping/biting? Also, training tips? I’ll take anything. Thanks you guys!

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#24

I am a closeted queer person and my parents are kinda homophobic/transphobic. My Dad works at my school and I am constantly looking around corners. They have started monitoring my phone (I’m not even sure if I won’t get caught reaching out like this) and I have gotten caught talking to my gay/FTM BFF about me being queer. My dad has come up with this narrative about how my friend (mentioned above) is trying to sell me on being gay and that I am too young to know. He says that he has gay friends and that they didn’t know until they were in college, but I am sure that I am, in fact queer. Any help is appreciated. ❤️

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#25

I'm an introvert, so I like to be alone, but I afraid of gradually getting lonely as I grow older. I need the contact with people, but I hate (and can't do) small talk. My ideal day is staying home, playing games and walking with my dog, but I don't want to become an insane, grumpy person, living only like this. I wait robots and software to take away my job and pay taxes instead of me, but I want to feel that I am part of the society.

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#26

Every time I post a comment on Bored Panda that is an accurate statement of fact, people down vote it.

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#27

well, lately me and my girlfriend have been in a weird spot- like we hug and stuff but otherwise when we are with friends i feel like she ignores me. She told me that "sorry i am just bad at showing affection.." even tho she once had this other girlfriend and she was like all over her and shit. i think i am over thinking it but i dont know if i should be worried or not.. pls help

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#28

I apologize that it's super long. Ok, so I found a classmate attractive and we started talking because of a group assignment. I developed feelings for him and wouldn't you know it, he gave me his snapchat. As a naive teenager I fell hard for such an act and searched him up. Nothing. I checked snapchat, twitter, facebook, and instagram. It had appeared as if he didn't exist. Immediately: He's trolling me! But why? So the next day I confronted him. He claimed he gave the right one. Then hours later saying that because I confronted him, his buddy told him I had a crush on him, *Yipes! How?!* Then straight up asked for my number, gave blunt comments about my attractiveness, gave me his number, and started talking dirty to me. I was freaking out of how fast and easy things were going, that I was absolutely suspicious. *In my head: Yeah no* So I gave him a fake number in result. I later felt bad and texted him with my real number. Two weeks went by and this boi BARELY talked to me and if he did, every word was short-answered, misspelled, or abbreviated. If anything, I was lucky to even get a "Okay". He one day out of nowhere asked if we could date now and promised all these great things of being loyal. It then struck me that he was desperate. I didn't want to be mean so I felt pressured and had a long night of sobbing, ice cream eating, and worrying what my parents would think. But I said yes because I had convinced myself that I liked him. He then turned around and told me that he was messin. I felt so relieved and did cartwheels, but a sense of anger lingered as I STILL(stupidly) continued to talk to him. We zoomed, texted, and called for a good week. I found out that he was rich UwU. He asked me to date again, but I didn't want to fall for it and told him sure as a joke. He apologized after and told me that his brother sent the message. (Which was a lie because his brother didn't live with him at all). Moving forward to the next day, he was "pretending" to talk to his crush(we'll call her Adri) in front of me. I was honestly full of joy that he didn't like me, but it was a little sad. I started making jokes about them together as I would with any friend. Apparently, by doing this, it..."turned him on?" and got him to ask me officially out. *sigh* I told him "ok, I guess" and oh boy did I make the worst decision. He kept sending these s*x jokes, emojis, and calling me mamma. I was...horrified! After bugging him about the snap account thing, he sent me a screenshot of his full account. I was astound when I saw his story page: Dares and Memes. And under dares and memes was a list of names that appeared to belong to girls. The first one I saw was, you guessed it, Adri. The dots connected so perfectly that I was too stubborn to see it. My classmate was a player. And the list of girl names were his prey. I felt betrayed and wanted to help those girls, but I knew not one of them. I took every positive thing into consideration, finding some sense in this, but couldn't. I later got a text from him saying, "I don't like to date you right now". GREAT!! Me NEITHER!! And I never talked to him after that. And when I accidentally did, he told me to send nudes to date again......... What.The.Actual.Flip.Is.Wrong.With This.Guy? I still have classes with him (hooray ( ͠° ͟ʖ ͡°) ) But I just wanted advice of what I should do now since I can't let this go knowing I probably have a opportunity to do something about it.

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#29

How do I help my children have a healthy understanding of food? I’ve been obese and food addicted all my life, I’ve had bariatric surgery. I still struggle, but I know what are right and wrong food choices. The problem is, my husband is naturally thin, and even though our 13yo is 250 pounds, and our 4 year old is 60 pounds, he stops at the store every single day to pick up cases of sugar pop, gummy candy, or a 6 pack of mcDonalds cheeseburgers for one kid. I’ve fought, I’ve educated, I’ve dumped out bad food both in secret and right in front of everyone, I’ve done meal plans and prepped weekly healthy foods. I still can’t seem to make him understand that he is hurting our children by teaching them it’s normal to eat chips, soda, candy, and fast food every single day. He’s watched me struggle and complained plenty about my weight over the years, I know he doesn’t want our kids to be obese, but this man who can re-build a car engine by hand from memory, cannot seem to make the connection that too much sugar = obesity for people with my genetics. I’ve actually considered divorce to save my kids, even though the rest of our marriage is good.

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#30

I'm pretty sure nobody likes me. Everybody is telling me I'm annoying, and my family always pins the blame for anything bad on me. My older brother bullies me, and my parents don't do anything about it, even when they're there. My other siblings like to pick on me too. And my little sister has no definition of personal space and my parents baby her because she's the youngest. I feel like my family would rather not have me around, other than to use my as an emotional punching bag.

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#31

bipolar (i think, cant get tested), extremely depressed, suicidal, and gay as f*** but i cant vent. Try to solve this, bored panda

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#32

Not necessarily a problem per se, but I would like to know how the heck bitcoin works.

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#33

I don’t Think that this can be solved but I have a little problem. I was playing Among Us and found the nicest person. I couldn’t tell them my phone number, or any way to get in touch with me before the server disconnected. So, if Cyberdoggo (Cyan) met PRISONMIKE(Pink) in the Pollus map, Please comment. Thank you so much!

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#34

I found out my husband was trying to reconnect with an ex. He met on tinder when we where separated for 6 months in 2018. I told him I knew and that it was over. That was two weeks ago. He hasn't tried to contact me to explain or apologise or anything. I feel so alone, but if he really wanted me he would have tried explaining his actions right?

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#35

coping mechanisms for depression ? reasons to stay ?? i've been struggling a bit lately so if some advice or something could be given that would be wonderful :D

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#36

8th grade is hard. I don't know many others at my school. It doesn't help that my two brothers and I got high and decided to do our own haircuts. One of my brothers made my hair SO SO SO short, I prefer it in White-boii-afro-curly-head-thing. I just don't like my hair.

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#37

how do i stop myself from cutting and doing things like that? help?

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#38

So, because of zoom calls and school, I don't exactly have time to care for myself. And so I forget to eat...most of the time. I lost 7 pounds in the last 2 weeks its horrible I know, My question is, How do I keep a healthy eating habit and stop being stressed about my school work.

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#39

My sister want to blackmail me using my secret accounts that I really don't want my parents to know about. What should I do?

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#40

Soooooo I have this crush. It was really weird when I realized that I had a crush on him because we were just friends who weren't even that close and I don't ever remember being attracted to him in any way before. Then one day it just kinda hit me like a ton of rocks, almost like a second person inside my head, telling me that I liked him. And I was like "Holy cow I do?" and my mind told me "Hell yeah girl you do!!!" This has never happened to me before. It was about two months ago. The sad part is he's already in a relationship. I never hear him talk about her and I've never seen them together so sometimes I forget about her. I don't hate her, she's really nice, but it just makes me sad because I have never had a crush like this before (and believe me I've had many). Sometimes I think that she is just a middle school girlfriend, nobody lasts up here lol, our time will come eventually, but sometimes I get so sad because I doubt that anything will ever work out. On top of that I have to deal with his friends asking me who my crush is bc they can probably smell it from a mile away that I like him. Please just give me a little bit of help and sorry if I'm being incoherent this is my first time asking for help on BP. Thanks y'all :)

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#41

My friend is Jewish and often gets bothered by racist people

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#42

I am a lesbian with a homophobic family. I have to wait years to finally move out and be myself. How do I survive until then?

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#43

I am 11 and still do not have a phone how do I convince my parents to get me one?

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#44

I've already posted here but I thought of something else. I've recently gotten into some trouble and I'm not sure how to handle it. Okay so I started dating one of my friends, but the longer it went on the more I realized I didn't actually like her and I just wanted someone to cling to. So I talked to her about it and she was obviously upset and didn't talk to me for a while. When she finally did she still wanted to be friends!!?? I was really surprised because it isn't the first time, I've done it before and I hurt her really bad. The problem is I don't know why. I really care about her and there was no reason for me to do that to her. I don't want to lie to her and hurt her like that but I do it anyway and I feel awful about it. Is there something wrong with me??? How can I fix it??

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#45

Me and my boyfriend have been together over 3 years, we live together and have a dog. I've been waiting for the day we get engaged. I thought we were on the same page. I've started college and work at the same time but we decided that I should work less so I can finish my school in time with good grades. He would works so we can live mostly on his pay.
But now he suddenly told me his not sure he wants to be with me anymore.
I'm not sure how to mentally or financially cope. Any advice?

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#46

I really need help identifying my emotions. For example, when you see an opossum looking cute and your heart does that "pump blood but not in the way it does when I see my toxic friend" feeling. Also I thought I had a crush on several people because I didn't know the difference between love and enjoying a person's company. And is there a name for the lack of emotion I feel a lot?

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#47

I sometimes constantly feel like some people around me hate me for who I am. I have been really good at controlling myself, I only ever "hang out" with my real friends.

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#48

So, I recently found out I'm trans. Female-to-male to be exact. I really want to come out to my family. My parents are super accepting and stuff, but I'm not so sure about my other family. Please help me-

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#49

My two best friends in the whole world are moving away

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#50

My cousin and BFF committed suicide last year. And I just can’t get over it. How do you try to start moving on from someone who is really close to you’s suicide?

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#51

Hey Pandas I have an annoying siblings that are always bothering me.

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#52

I have started hitting myself and calling myself a mistake rubbing it of and going with a fake smile everyone I can't talk about this to anyone because I'll end up getting scolded and getting hit again so any suggestions to overcome this

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#53

Also I'm just going through a tough time rn, and I just need a few words of encouragement. It doesn't seem like much but it would mean a lot to me.

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#54

I have a problem. What should I do with friend that is always a bully, always trying to get on my nerves, and someone in my family looks up to him. And he is not a good role model at all. And they don’t really have a persistent attitude.

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#55

My partners is emotionally abusive and i seriously consider separating from him. But i am confused as he is a good father to the child, he earns a lot and buys every property in my name, spends every thing on me even gives me his whole salary, good to my family. But he is emotionally distant, name calling me, never available when i need, even if i am sick he doesnt ask, we hardly talk. He is not gay doesnt have a girl friend, i have asked for divorce amicably but wont let me go. I feel so lonely, this is driving me crazy. What kind of personality is that.

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#56

hello does anyone have advice on how to feel good about how you look? i always appreciate it when people compliment me but i feel like i dont feel good about myself and i really want to be able to look in the mirror or at the scale and feel beautiful regardless of what people say.

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#57

Since you asked, the economy's been a bit of a (bleep) lately with the shut downs and all, so I'll ask that you support small busineses and the artists who supply them. Don't know if it's cool to post my Etsy shop address here or not.
And, if you have any Holiday shopping 'problems', We're here to help!

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#58

Hi pandas, this is a pretty complicated one. My best friend wants to run away because of their abusive parents and stay either in a shelter or with a friend for the rest of the school year. I would love for them to stay with me but I live too far away and I don't know if my parents are trustworthy. Their mom hits them but I don't know how bad it is. I am really stressed out and I don't know if I should call the police or somebody.

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#59

My dad is always rude to my sister and I (we are teenagers) when we talk to him and he gaslights us all the time. He used to be nice once upon a time. When we told our mom, she said that he's under a lot of stress during work so we had to bottle up our feelings. Recently, my dad lost his job and spends hours in a room and when he comes outside, he's always trying to control whatever my sister and I do for little things like "stop doing this or that". My sister and I are trying our hardest to be nice all the time but what should we do when my dad is always rude to us? Should we just bottle up our feelings? My mom understands but she comes with random excuses to stop us from hating our dad. Thank you so much!

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#60

I am depressed and constantly anxious. i hate everything and everyone hates me. My families homophobic and my dad and brothers constantly call me a faggot. WTF am i supposed to do?

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#61

My friend is very attractive, im talking head-turning. Guys stop to talk to her, waiters only checked in on her & completely ignored me, etc etc. i sound petty but i mean, how can i be ...more likeable like her? Other than the looks part, which is already impossible

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#62

I feel very stressed out with all the schoolwork I have to do, taking care of myself, eating healthy, finding out who I am, having fun, just basically everything society as well as my parents expect me to do. And I'm also lonely. :(

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#63

Too many to count, but can y'all help me out with this one?
I'm young, as in middle school, and I have a boyfriend. I really really like him because he's funny and nice and sensitive, plus I think he's kinda cute... I don't really have any particular problems, but do you pandas have any advice you can give me? Because I like him a lot and I don't want this to end badly.

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#64

I am a teenage female. I suspect I have "mild" or "high-functioning" or "Autism 1" or whatever the politically correct word is now. In females, autism is harder to spot. It can look like High Sensitivity, OCD, depression, etc.

I feel different from my peers. For one things, my interests are in different places: I like physics, chem, bio, drawing, painting, animals, and humanities, while my friends are into TV shows, studying for SAT, and gossip. For another, I am almost never completely still (stim?). My most constant ones are toe rubbing, leg shaking, and doodling. I need lots of time to recharge. I am constantly thinking--my thoughts are never quiet. I'm extremely introverted and I get overstimulated by people, noise, and lights. I feel like I am wearing a mask a lot of the time. I don't like physical touch. It is extremely difficult for me to recognize my emotions, much less process and share them.

The problem is, it isn't interfering with my life, which I heard is needed to get a diagnosis. Is this true? Maybe life gets harder as I age, so it could interfere as more things are demanded of me... is that how this works?

For against: I am able to make eye contact, I wasn't delayed as a child, I am able hold conversations, listen to others, understand and use sarcasm, take turns in conversation, talk on the phone, and use my vivid imagination.

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#65

I wanna gain weight but I feel awkward about it is there like a medicine or something that can help

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#66

i have terrible anxiety with needles. it's so bad i don't want a covid vaccine yet. heck, i get scared about the word shot or vaccine or needle. any tips?

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#67

I have turned to self harm to feel numb.

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#68

My younger sisters are always together and I'm always left out. I'm the oldest, but it seems like they team up against me to say mean things. Also, how do you find out if someone likes you if you're too scared/shy/awkward to ask? How do you tell someone you like them? How do you ask for someone's number without making it weird or ruining the friendship if that's the best you can get?

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#69

How do i know if my crush likes me back

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#70

How do I confess my feelings to a girl? I am thinking of telling her, but every time I come to it, I chicken out. what to do? (Advice preferably from girls)

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#71

I want to come out as gay to my family (besides my mom and dad, they already know). I love them, and don't like hiding things from them. But, I have no idea how they'll react. On the one hand, I know they love me, but on the other hand, I don't know how open-minded they are. I don't know how they'll react. If they react like my parents did,, I'll be grateful, but our family is a Christian family, and I don't really know their opinion on gay people

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#72

Known I was bi for a bit now, told a friend, but idk how to tell my parents, any advice would be helpful.

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#73

I never believed in god. My direct family does. They aren't necessarily mean or strict about it but I don't know how to tell them.

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#74

My life is a mess. I've moved this summer and I don't have any friends. High school is hard.

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#75

Why is there so much hate? People say they want equality, like how women say they want to be equal to men, but they won't believe that girls can be just as toxic as boys, why is this?

Sorry, Its just this has been a problem I have been trying to solve..

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#76

The Chicago Bulls can't get a top pick and continually have been bad for like the last 15 years.

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#77

I have this crush. She is super kind, pretty and she seems like the perfect person for me. Problem is shes straight and taken. But I have seen her boyfriend around other girls. Recently we have been growing apart, and me and her bf HATE EACH OTHER. so, if she doesnt believe me, or he lies, and btw she knows i like her, or she pulls the jealous card, what do i do?

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#78

I wanted to re-join the amish community, which I left about a decade ago. I know this is complicated, but do you have any advice or tips on what to do? I have small children who haven't experienced what it is like.

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#79

Many people in my friend group have problems at home and are very stressed. My life is not perfect either. But whenever something bad happens to my friends, we all work through it together and take them to the school social worker and try to make their life more bearable. But I try not to bring my own problems up, because I feel like I put pressure on my friends. My life is stressful, but not stressful enough to be the main focus of my friends.

Plus, my friends read boredpanda too. They are probably checking the name right now and I feel terrible for putting this out there where they can see it and feel bad.

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#80

i know this is not as serious as the others but how do i say no to someone asking me to be a girlfriend to them?!?!?!?! he gave me a few days but i need a little bit of help

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#81

i'm failing health class and my mother doesn't seem to accept me for who i am 🏳️‍🌈 if you know what i mean.

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#82

Ok try to solve this for me pls: I am polyamorous so I prefer to date more than one person but it’s not cheating because it’s like a threesome or foursome, but anyways my current girlfriend is not polyamorous and someone I like likes me back and I’ve tried ignoring my feelings before but they just came back and now I’m confused but I’m not going to cheat on my girlfriend because that is just messed up but I can’t reject the person I like because I won’t stop liking them I tried it and it did t work last time so we are in the exact same situation and I need help🥲

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#83

Me and my friend got out of a toxic friendship a few years ago, but it damaged her more than me. She often asks me if she is being too clingy and annoying when she most definitely is not. We are best friends, but sometimes I feel like there is a sort of small barrier that was put between us, so we are not being completely honest ( idk if that is the right word ) or as close as we could be due to the toxic friendship. How do I take down these barriers so we can be more close?

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#84

why does school think its a good idea to cram science fair into a single quarter instead of just skipping it?

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#85

I think I’m bisexual. This isn’t a problem, I’m just really confused... help?

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#86

I’m trying to write an album, but none of my lyrics are sticking. I have all these ideas, lyrics that I think are awesome, but then when I go to write them down I forget them. I ended up writing a song about a gas station once because I had an awesome idea that had “serv-o” as ONE LYRIC but then it ended up engulfing the entire song. Anyone know of any creative exercises for songwriters?

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#87

20 random cards are placed in a neat row, all faced down. A move consists of two steps: Turning only a face-down card face up, and then turning over the card immediately and keeping it on the right side. Show that no matter what the choice of cards, the sequence must terminate.

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