Who doesn't love pets? That furry friend that greets you at the door and the one you can cuddle with late at night. Almost everyone has one and who can blame them? Who doesn't want someone to love them unconditionally?

But have you ever wondered what would happen if your pet talked, I sure have?

So pandas if your pet could talk, what would it say?

#1

At this very moment, my cat with whom I am sharing my chair would say: "Move, hooman, this is my spot."

Report

#2

"NO BOOP" >:(

Report

Add photo comments
POST
tzipporagold avatar
View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#3

My dog would say "Hooman stop talking in a baby voice and get meh food."

Report

#4

My rabbit princess would say: "Every living creature on earth shall obey me! I'm the almighty overlord! Commit yourselves to me worthless living being"! And my dog would say: "MEAT!"

Report

#5

My dog would say two things, "Gimme food," or, "Come play with me."

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#6

"Where's my food?" -My black cat. "I feel like biting my brother today." -My torbie.

Report

#7

My 2 cats would be saying "FEED ME AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN!!!!"

Report

Add photo comments
POST
ADVERTISEMENT
#8

Parakeet 1 : Hey, stop touching me !
Parakeet 2: Im not touching you, your touching me !
Parakeet 3 : SHUT UP !
* I come downstairs
Cockatiel: Oh good , the parakeets are on the verger of killing each other.

Report

ADVERTISEMENT
#9

My youngest cat would probably tell me to feed him, and my oldest would scream at people to leave him alone (he’s very independent and hates cuddles)

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#10

"why the hekk you wake me up at 3 am making the weird sound, awwwwwww all the time??!??!"

Report

#11

gib food nao

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#12

My cat would probably ask for even more food than he already does...

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#13

Cat 1 (my husbands cat): Your Mother is never coming home, ever again. Despair.
Cat 2 (my cat): Lies! Mother loves me! She will return!
Me coming back from the mail box: Hey Dumb Dumbs, miss me?
Cat 2 (Meeting me at the landing and escorting me up the stairs): Mommy! I love you! I knew you'd return! Love me! Love me!
Cat 1(draped across the back of the couch, has not moved for hours, flips me off by minutely flicking his tail): No, go away and take the loud one with you.

Report

Add photo comments
POST
ADVERTISEMENT
#14

Why you keep waking me up at 2am?! Its so hard not to pet her she is a kitten and looks so adorable when she sleeps.

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#15

Where are my testicles?

Report

#16

Dad walks into room: Oh yes, servant 3!
He gets a drink and leaves: Fine, back to servants 1 and 2 ( me and brother)
Mom walks in: OH YES ALPHA I HAVE SPOTTED FRESH SQUIRREL TO BARK AT
Mom leaves: SERVANTS I COMMAND YOU TO BRING ME UP OF THE STAIRS
( He isn't allowed upstairs)
This is what I imagine him as

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#17

if i had a pet it would say "I WUV U"

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#18

Gizmo (my young horse): I am the Boss. The only Boss. This is why I need food

Cartmen (my retired horse) : I am not boss. Just sweet and happy. And needing food...... like now

Gizmo: NO! All food is for me! 'Cause I am boss! and fast! and smart!

Cartmen : *nom nom*

Gizmo: 0-0

Cartmen: *nom nom nom nom*

Gizmo: *nom nom nom nom nom*

Both horses: *nom nom nom nom*................thanx mom

Report

ADVERTISEMENT
#19

probably "HEY, HUMAN!!! GIVE PETS SO I CAN BITE YOU!!!!!!!! or just give food and toy, anything works..

(he's a dog)

Report

#20

"Food? No food?" *expectant sitting position*
"MY DUCK DUCK-"
"Play with me!" *let the zoomies commence*
"Move over, this my spot. Hmph."
"IWANTWALKWALKWALKWALKWALKWALK!!!"
"I hate you." *sits on lap*
"No nose boops!"

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#21

I've taught my 3-year granddaughter that one of our three pitbulls, Lucy, says "Oh Dear God" whenever she is there.

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#22

Food food food, can u pet me, aaah no pet, u scary, i want food now, can i eat this, food? Can i bite finger? Food food

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#23

Kitty: Why are you typing on my sleeping board.
Dog: Throw the ball, throw the ball, throw the ball, throw the ball. Nooooo, no touchy. Throw the ball throw the ball...........

Report

Add photo comments
POST
ADVERTISEMENT
#24

"Girl if you don't stop hugging me so tight my head's gonna pop."

Report

#25

“Why the hell are you grabbing my face like that?”

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#26

F*****g feed me you insignificant pile of feculent bolts, this is animal abuse to not feed your pets. My cat Crowley to the automatic feeder.

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#27

He would just scream, all the time, everyday. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#28

"give me butt scratches hooman. now that i can talk i have all the power over yoo."

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#29

I think my kitten blue would say:















































































"move peasants, this is my kingdom, I am the god of snuggles and murder, bow down to me"

Report

ADVERTISEMENT
#30

My pet would say, "I want to go to the backyard and them come back either 1 second later or 6 hours later!"

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#31

Walter Cat: “No hooman. You cannot go to toilet. Not finished nap.”

All 7 of them: “Would you eat this crap you give us?”

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#32

My cat: give me the food you stupid hooman
My dog: give me love and I will give you more
My chickens: foodfoodfooddrinkfoodfood

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#33

“You’re not doing it right!” (Petting, playing, feeding, whatever).

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#34

My family’s dog who almost certainly has separation anxiety:
“WHERES MUM? WHERES MUM? WHERE THE HECK IS MUM???”

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#35

Why amb I living with you ?

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#36

My dog: Give. me. The. Ball. NOW! Throw the ball throw that ball how shoot you threw the ball
My kitten: Am lionz mumma looks I go rawr
And finally my bird who acts like Gordon Ramsey
Bird: Awe you stupid peasant I said fine ground bird seed not this rubbish mess

Report

#37

My bird would say 2 things: "HOOMAN SHUT THE F&*$ UP!"
and "Hooman, pleese clean meh bird seed shells."

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#38

Our old lovebug Fibbo: "why you no lemme snug? stahp pushin me! >:c i shall lyk face to get you to lemme snug. aw you happy now :D snug time"
Our little rascal Sassy: "ima be as loud as possible running around upstairs so you hear a stampede of buffalo as you try to watch BattleBots >:D"
Our dog Franklin: "take me on run! gimme food! take me on walk? cuddles pls. thamk."
The lizard: "i didn't eat my celery again eheheheheheheheheheh"

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#39

my cat would say, GET YOUR A*S OFF MY FU*KING SEAT YOU BI*H

Report

See Also on Bored Panda
#40

Old gurl: PET MY BUTT
Bubbersh: BELLY RUUUUUBBBBBBBBBBBBSSSSSSSS

Report

Add photo comments
POST
jaydenpenzien avatar
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My cat: FEEEEEEEEEEED MMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! In a deep voice lol

#41

my doggo would say "feed me more you peasants" or "gosh i hate this worls so much"

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#42

My dog would say 'give me food and belly rubs now!"

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#43

hey bro. imma tell all your secrets if you dont constantly feed me. and probably a lot of cussin from hearing it from me when i hurt myself

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#44

Snacks, more snacks, just all the snacks.

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#45

F**KING PAT ME

Report

#46

So, I put a fat face filter on my elderly rescue dog. The way she stares at me just screams, “Oh god will you please stop”

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#47

they would say something like "come onnnn lets go play come on come on come i want to playyyy play with usssss" or "we want food give us food we want it now"

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#48

“you fed me an hour ago and there’s still food in my bowl but i need more.”

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#49

He'd probably ask, "Where's all my food?" while staring directly at it.

Report

Add photo comments
POST
See Also on Bored Panda
#50

My dane would say "hooman pet me and play with me and feed me and give me loves all the time" and my poodle would say "pet me. feed me. play with me. snuggle me. all i ask." I imagine my dane has a really high pitched voice and then my poodle sounds like a happy version of eeyore with a slightly higher voice.

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#51

well, this is my cat that ran out of the garage when we were moving but... "hey hooman gimme snuggles, chubbiesness, food, and let my fluffy self fart every 2 minutes!! also imma poke da dog."

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#52

giv meh food hooman!

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#53

my cat would say this is my house not yours. you are my servant. my dog would say get that cardboard away from me!(he afraid of cardboard)

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#54

*my tarantula* why does it rain only in my dirt holder?

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#55

I wish he would tell me why he keeps digging out of the yard.

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#56

I'm hungry even though I just ate literally 3 minutes ago

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#57

My hamster: whyyyyyy did you wake me uppppppp?
Me: it’s noon
My hamster: then feeeed meeeee!
Me: only if you let me pet you
Hamster: fiiiiiiiiine but not my face!

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#58

“Guuuurl are you really gonna make me have me stay inside for a whole ten minutes?” My dog pepper would probably say

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#59

I don't have one.

Report

Add photo comments
POST
See Also on Bored Panda