Pandas, please share some ideas on how to get over depression.

#1

How I got over my... ?

I will let you know as soon as that happens.

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AliceInWonderland?
Community Member
1 month ago

Oh my god I love your response

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#2

I have chronic mild depression and reoccurring major depression, and I'm an alcoholic.
I got into therapy. I got clean/sober. Started taking antidepressants as prescribed. Developed a spiritual life. Continued to work on myself, confront the things that caused me problems, seek ways to improve.

There is no quick fix, but it can get better. I still have depression, but I am not depressed. I'm living my best life and I expect it to keep getting better.

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Deb Phair
Community Member
1 month ago

Thats how it works!! I'm right there with you! Congratulations!!!!

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#3

I didn't. I learned to accept that, unfortunately, it is part of me and I can only learn to live with it. I recognise the signs and prepare myself to be emotionally assaulted by it's ugly presence. For me, the first sign is complete loss of appetite followed by irritability by everyone and everything around me. I plucked up the courage to call a meeting with my manager to lay bare all the facts about my depression and anxiety and in doing this I no longer have the pressure of having to force a smile and pretend everything is okay at work when it isn't. So whenever I'm entering a particularly dark phase then I am allowed to call off work for however long it takes me to feel more stable. I volunteered my medical information to my boss and that way it's been noted on my file so I don't have to explain or repeat myself when I call off sick. I have such a supportive workplace. I also have a very supportive partner who understands that I'm not in control of my depression. When I was single I did used to worry that nobody would want me as I'm damaged goods and complicated at times. But being in a relationship with someone for 8 years means they know me inside out and know what to expect. I've found distracting myself with websites such as this (not to sound too soppy but thank you Bored Panda) and keeping myself to myself by sleeping on the couch allows me to get through my depressive episodes faster. Unlike a lot of people I really don't find talking helps so I enjoy peace and quiet, although music sometimes helps. For all the partners of depressed people out there- sometimes you don't have to say or do anything to show your support, all you have to do is be there. Something as small and insignificant as gently rubbing your partners back is enough to make them feel loved and supported. Stay safe everyone ❤

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Thomas Duncan
Community Member
1 month ago

My employer is also excellent in this regard; without that support and my wife, I likely wouldn't be here to post.

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#4

First off, there is a temporary depression that comes with say, losing a job, a loved one, anything that can bum you out for a few days. These are usually passing. You can "get over these" just by the passage of time, most of the time.
When you're talking clinical depression, there is no "getting over" it. Medication and treatment can help alleviate the symptoms, but you cannot be "cured". If you are severely hindered by your depression in your daily life, its time to seek professional help (if not before).

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Lyone Fein
Community Member
1 month ago

Yes!

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#5

I have been in a major depression for years. I have two answers:

1. You wouldn’t believe how good it feels to own it. I decided I was too depressed to get through on my own and knew I was on the brink then decided to tell my close friends. Bottling it up was actually the absolute wrong thing for me to do. The weight I’d been feeling was gone, and now I feel protected by people who love me for all of what I am.

2. I say to people I talk with “I just need you to hear, let me feel heard, no need to figure out how fix it for me. Just give me your compassion for awhile.

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Doc Thissen
Community Member
1 month ago

This needs to be higher.

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#6

You don’t get over depression, you get through it. With medication, family, friends, and support though therapy.

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Community Member
1 month ago

*through (typo sorry)

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#7

Well, I have not quite gotten over it, but I have certainly improved, and I'm proud of myself and thankful to my family and the doctors. I've come from sobbing every night, being a bit violent, and suicidal to taking medicine, and learning to cope with my depression and anxiety.

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Jonathan
Community Member
1 month ago (edited)

I've always found suicidal thoughts to be terrifying, so scary how they both begin and end out of nowhere.

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#8

I find small things I enjoy and tell myself "This is something worth living for"

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saesha has depression
Community Member
1 month ago

i dont have anything worth living for but i keep going on with life

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#9

Honestly, by letting myself be depressed. By thinking of it the same way you'd think of a cold. By making sure to know my signs, acknowledge when I'm depressed, and following my biggest rule - never analyze my life or make big decisions when depressed (because it's like trying to get an accurate view of the world while wearing dark sunglasses.) By catching negative self talk and talking back. ("God, I'm such an idiot. Hey, you can't call me an idiot!" "Why can't I do this hard thing? What the hell is wrong with me? Haha, damn! I really AM depressed. Time for a Coke and some murder shows! I can do that hard thing later, no big.")

Now, I still get depressed, but not as deep or for as long. Because I no longer get depressed about being depressed.

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Richard Portman
Community Member
1 month ago

Same, or similar. I don't like being depressed but i accept it as the weather of my soul. It would be like asking why are you so happy today?

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#10

Art and regular exercise (not much of it, as I also have ME and chronic pain) help me a lot, but I need to be on antidepressants to get to the point where I can motivate myself to do them.
If you have depression, ask your doctor about medication. It's not weakness, or some sort of moral failure. Your body isn't producing enough neurotransmitters, and medication can help with that.

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Squirrelflightisawesome
Community Member
1 month ago

Amen.

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#11

I manage my depression or it manages me. Exercise, positive activities, medication therapy, my dog, my friends and family are all part of the process and it can be exhausting, so I am occasionally overwhelmed and have to re-evaluate the process and adjust.

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#12

In my case you don't, 35 years and counting. SSRI's help, but they just mask the depression; depression manifests itself at any time, regardless of what pill you're swallowing.

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Thomas Duncan
Community Member
1 month ago

Yep

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#13

I find it as like a wave, and I honestly just sleep until it's over.

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Jonathan
Community Member
1 month ago

Sometimes sleep is the safest option. If anything it helps pass the time as the days are so long during an episode of depression! Positive dreams are also great at lifting spirits!

#14

I bettered myself. I went back to school got an Engineering Degree and a great Job. At the same time I got into running. Let me tell you the runner's high is real. Tuns of endorphins and adrenaline.

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Thomas Duncan
Community Member
1 month ago

I tried this for months ( to lose weight, not for depression ) Never once got runners high, but I know several folks who do.

#15

Before you are diagnosed with depression, anxiety or low self-esteem make sure you're not just surrounded by arseholes...

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Leslie K Von Dell
Community Member
1 month ago

LOL! I love this!

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#16

Thanks, Bored Panda, for posting these!
I manage my mild depression by looking for fun stuff to read on Bored Panda.

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saesha has depression
Community Member
1 month ago

:)

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#17

Pills.

I’ll have to take them for the rest of my life. As long as they keep working, I’m totally fine with that.

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Debby Hartinger
Community Member
1 month ago

Our bodies change as we age, so stay on top of what you're taking.

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#18

Doing one small thing at a time to take control of my life back. I started with medication that allowed me to exercise.

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#19

I haven't. My younger brother died 6 years ago and my dad 3 years ago. Loosing my brother, who was 37 at the time, was the single worst thing to ever happen and plunged me into the deepest darkest place I have ever been to. I have never climbed back to the surface light.

My brother and my dad were more than father and son to each other too. Best friends and it hurt my dad deeply. My dad and I spent more time together after my brother passed away - I live in a different town, roughly an hours drive away. My dad would come up each Saturday and we would go bowling together - Crown Green Bowling - He joined the club I was a member of. Many good times.

He was supposed to be coming up to the end of season awards bash, an excuse to go and get drunk with your mates really, hotel booked and everything. He rand me and said he was going to come but not stay he'd drive up and head back the same night. He didn't sound right on the phone and I called him back, I just got lots of heavy, laboured breathing.

I knew he wasn't right so I drove down to see him, got his spare keys from mums house (they had split many years ago but remained friends - she still did his washing!) and went to his. I found him crashed out on the floor in the dark. He'd hit his head on the ceramic fireplace and wasn't in a good way at all.

Rang 999 and got an ambulance out. Took into the local hospital for some tests, he was there a few weeks before being transferred to a specialist unit in Manchester.

He was there several weeks, I was there almost everyday. He was showing progress but suffered multiple heart attacks and passed in his sleep.

It was hard to loose him, but strangely, didn't hit me as hard as loosing my brother. I don't know why and I feel bad for it not hurting as much. I don't think that I'll ever recover from loosing these two, it's a little easier everyday but it is still very dark.

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Josy Bannon
Community Member
1 month ago

I am sorry for your loss and all you had to go trough. You were such a good son, taking good care of your father. I Hope things get better one day for you and you can see light again!

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#20

I remember being scared all the time of my parents dying or something bad happening to me or my family, and my parents just told me to try harder and I didnt want to tell them how i felt because I felt like I was a burden to them, but when i started to talk about how i felt i started to get better, every time another wave of sadness came, they were there for me. For everyone out there who is having a bad time just keep going, even when you feel like you are at your worst and that its never going to get better just keep going. I'm only twelve, I have a hole life ahead of me, so for everyone reading this please just remember your loved ones, thats my advice.

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Debby Hartinger
Community Member
1 month ago

That's great wisdom from a 12-year-old. :)

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#21

I have a whole list of 'issues' including depression. I don't think it will ever go away completely, but I am learning tricks to help myself out. I've been in & out of therapy for years, but most of the ways I help myself I've learned on my own:
I write, draw comics of situations that bother me, imagine negative thoughts leaving my head and burning into the sun, practicing meditation, remove people from my life who cause anxiety and negativity, doing little favors for 'future me', being outside - walks/run, decorating my space in ways that make me happy - lots of string lights.
I'm still learning how to take care of myself and not expect to make all the problems go away, but make it easier to deal with the depression and still function. Its a process.

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Josy Bannon
Community Member
1 month ago

"doing little favors for 'future me'" YES I do that too! :-) A way of self love

#22

Well depression stays with you. But it can get better. I like to play flute and listen to jazz to help. But I also take prozac which helps as well. I actually wrote a poem about depression. I'll share it on here.

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Community Member
1 month ago

Actually I made a post for it. Press on it in my profile

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#23

By coming to the conclusion that "if you want something to change, you have to do things you never done before". It was still a long way to go, but I got there in the end. In my case, psychologists/psychiatrists didn't help much, because I found them to be too easy to fool. So now I'm studying to become a psychologist myself, so I can help to learn others how to deal with it. My advice will still be to talk to professionals though, they can really help a lot if you allow them to.

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Melissa Jones
Community Member
1 month ago

I agree professional therapy didn’t work. It’s too mundane

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#24

I... didn't. I didn't even learn how to manage it like some people on here. I just live with it and ignore the thoughts that tell me I'm not worth it, and I don't tell anyone. It's probably not the answer you were looking for, but it's what I do.

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Community Member
1 month ago

saesha darling are you okay? i've looked at a few of your posts and it sounds like you need to talk to someone

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#25

I never exactly got out of depression, but it is on and off with the feelings and stuff. I have had plenty of moodswing issues and cry for no reason many times. My besties try to help me al the time, and they do, but sometimes i do depressed.

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Debby Hartinger
Community Member
1 month ago

Besties are like therapists you don't have to pay. :) They can listen and try to help.

#26

I go to therapy

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R3belB4nny
Community Member
1 month ago

WE PRETTY MUCH ALL DO. IT STILL DOESNT HELP MAHHHH

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#27

well i don't know much because i'm kinda depressed rn but all you need to do is focus on happy things in you life instead of sad things oh and i'm not really good at giving people advice

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Debby Hartinger
Community Member
1 month ago

That's good advice. :)

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#28

It's the thinking I'm not depressed for me

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#29

I've gotten extremely good at hiding how I really feel from everyone in my life - Most people consider me a confident introvert I chose to say I was introverted because its very tiring to maintain this persona. I've just accepted who I am and have very low expectations of those around me which helps because really I know and have accepted that I'm a piece of s**t so I just feel lucky that anyone wants to stick around - its become more difficult since my partner moved in but luckily he's to caught up sexting with other people to notice or even ask which works perfectly for me - I don't blame him I own a mirror and have had to look at myself for the past 33 years I know its not a joy to wake up to this face - but i know he's with me because I take care of him so I distract myself with that - I just honestly don't want to be alone anymore - Sometimes you just have to accept who you are and take the best of what life will give you

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uber mensch
Community Member
1 month ago

Please, please, please... find someone you trust and/or believe in, start talking to them, and get help. Speaking from experience, it CAN get better.

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#30

Just started therapy. I talked myself out of doing it for years because my depression made me feel like it was impossible to feel better so why try. But I did the scariest thing I could imagine and I reached out to a therapist. It was hard and every session is hard but, I feel better every time I get a new tool to deal with how I feel and get more insight into myself.

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Josy Bannon
Community Member
1 month ago

Good for you and congrats for overcoming that fear!

#31

Nope. My husband is disabled now and cannot work. I have kids who go to school and sometimes they don’t because of Covid. It changes monthly. And I decided to adopt a puppy to make everyone happy, but he chews all my s**t, but I love him. My depression has turned into stress on how to make all of them happy and content. I work from home, run a diner and a dog training school to say the least. I don’t have time to be depressed and that stresses me out. I just fake happiness.

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Community Member
1 month ago

To clarify I don’t run a diner, I cook whatever they ask for and it’s hard. I used to love to cook but now I’m just a so called line cook In my own home.

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#32

I change my hair color. Then every time I look in the mirror I smile, sometimes laugh, and it is the new start to a new day and a new attitude. And I can always change it back if I ever need to. Women used to buy a new hat. Change something about yourself on the outside and there will be a difference on the inside. Comedy helps, too!

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Arezebrascool?123
Community Member
1 month ago

That’s amazing advice! I hope you are ok now!

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#33

I haven't. And honestly? I'm OK with that.
I manage symptoms through a combination of medication (no shame) and distraction (video games, books, films, sewing, even work). There are bad days which suck, but there are also good days.

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#34

I got a dog

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#35

Sometimes depression is life circumstances and not clinical. Then drugs don't help and actually give you horrible side effects. I found it when I keep my life busy and have lots of friends around me I'm not depressed. Covid has dumped me right back into it because I'm alone and things look awful. I keep in mind that that situation is improving.

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#36

Well I didn't have the best support system so it took a long time to finally decide to tell someone about it but when I told them I went to a mental hospital and therapy for a few months

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Jonathan
Community Member
1 month ago

What happens in hospital? I've only seen them in movies so I don't know how much they differ in reality? Sorry if I'm intruding, I just don't really wanna get stuck down a Google rabbit hole- would much rather hear from an actual person with experience. I hope you're doing well, especially right now. The virus has magnified my depression.

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#37

Self care. Finding funny things to watch or just in real life. Helping someone else who is depressed. Talking to a good friend. Going for a walk. Taking care of a pet. Music. Ahhh music. Meditation. Counting my blessings. Giving thanks. Prayer. Talk therapy.

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Rae Black
Community Member
1 month ago

Being grateful is huge for me, too. :)

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#38

Did something I love. Painting, writing, spending time with my pets, walking in the desert, watching the sunsets. Find the things you love and do them. If it's difficult to do so at first, force yourself. It gets easier. Eventually you realize you aren't sad, you're doing things and enjoying them.

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#39

13 years after my first visit to the psychiatric ward I can say with 100% certainty that in my case it takes a ton of medication. I've been admitted to hospital, had regular therapy sessions etc etc but that didnt do much. In the beginning I was given SSRIs, which were better than nothing but not good enough. After 3 years on those I got SNRIs instead and finally felt like myself again. And it's not like I'm happy 24/7 now, I just feel like a regular person with ups and downs. It's amazing!

My diagnosis is recurrent major depressive disorder and I'll probably be on meds for life.

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Debby Hartinger
Community Member
1 month ago

Congratulations for working on this and continuing to work things out until you found a solution. Sometimes it takes a while, but it's worth it. :)

#40

Learning that the bad days don't invalidate the good days.
Having a bad/terrible day doesn't mean that all the good days were 'fake', 'wishful thinking' or just imagined, or not that great after all; no matter what my brain tried to tell me.
I turned my good days from an 'impossible to reach goal' into a safety net,
At the beginning, it might have not been a good day, but just a good moment. But that doesn't make them less valid. Moments have turned into days, and I am certain, that someday they will become weeks.

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#41

Clinical depression is something you don’t get over. You have to learn how to keep it in check.
The #1 intervention is adhering to a regular sleep/wake cycle with 8 or more hours of sleep.
A close second is 20 mins or more of exercise as close to daily as you can. Simply walking can change your mood.

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#42

Well, I haven't quite gotten over the depression of my reptile dying, but what helps is to think of the nice parts of owning him.

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#43

Tamagotchis are the ultimate sadness relievers for me.

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#44

I doubt that it's something that a person *can* "get over" - at least not if it isn't relatively mild to start with. I've been on some hefty doses of antidepressants for nearly 30 years, and don't expect that to change any time soon.

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Tiny Dynamine
Community Member
1 month ago

You can. It's certainly not easy, but there are many stories of people who have got over it.

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#45

Still have not "got over" it- sometimes incredibly happy, sometimes hiding from my parents and crying. Sometimes I have extreme anxiety. It varies. I am only a child, so no antidepressants or therapists for me. I do have the school counselor though.

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Josy Bannon
Community Member
1 month ago (edited)

Do you think you can talk to your parents about this? They may understand you better if they know and might be able to help you. You shouldnt have to go through this alone. I hope talking to the school counselor helps!

#46

Exercise. Developing strong self boundaries and learning to say 'no, absolutely not.' Learning to love myself [even if it's not 100% consistent]; myself for only myself, and not someone else. Prioritizing the people who care about me vs wasting effort on people that don't. Going back to university and making friends :)

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Debby Hartinger
Community Member
1 month ago

You are strong and a fighter! It's great that you fought for yourself and won. :)

#47

The unfortunate reality of the matter is that regardless of culture/background, there's always been a stigma surrounding mental health issues in general, not necessarily just depression. As an example, a close family member of mine thinks that suicidal people are cowards who just want to escape from everything. As a human being AND as a music therapy student, I wholeheartedly disagree with that notion. I've been through depression before and had many dark thoughts within that realm, and I can tell you it's not us being cowards–oftentimes, as I see it at least from my experiences, it's years of negativity from other individuals and the overall environment alongside several other factors that you bury deep in your chest and rarely/never let out that causes it. Ultimately, indeed as many of you have said–take it one day at a time, and most importantly, do your best to surround yourself with positivity, be it from people, the environment, etc... Be safe and make wise decisions!

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#48

I haven't. And honestly? I'm OK with that.
I manage symptoms through a combination of medication (no shame) and distraction (video games, books, films, sewing, even work). There are bad days which suck, but there are also good days.

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#49

I clinical depression, attempted suicide last year... you don’t get over depression, you learn to live with it and you fight hard. Therapy and medication have been key in my struggle.

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Diandra “Mss Didi” Blackthorn
Community Member
1 month ago

Please look into TheTappingSolution.com - free, no drugs, and you have the control.

#50

Well, I didn't, but my medications help a lot. There are still days where I feel really bad, though. We need to work on diagnosing this medical problem! It's serious.

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#51

I would take good care of myself as if I were a little child I love and that needs some help right now. I will be understanding, honest, comforting and patient. Thats what I can do going through it, but I cant "overcome" it.

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#52

When I get depressed, I usually go to my room, take deep breaths, and rest a little, and when I wake up, I feel better. :)

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#53

A better way to word this post would be "How do you get THROUGH your depression." Unfortunately, even with intensive therapy, positive life changes, and decades of meds, many people, including me, don't get over it. We work on it daily, fighting it so it doesn't consume us. Depression is usually a life-long condition, to word it as "get over it" only promotes the myth that it's a character failing, as if we don't try hard enough.

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Josy Bannon
Community Member
1 month ago

I agree! It's good to know ways to make it more bearable though, but "getting over it" is a (dangerous) misconception, which might lead people to underestimate depression and stigmatise others.

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#54

Moomin books and the Moomin anime of the '90s.

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Tiny Dynamine
Community Member
1 month ago

Yes! Moomins rule!

#55

How I got over depression? Uh, well, ok. I've been depressed at least 11 times, and this is the 12th. To get over it, I just did what I loved most, like reading, doing book reports for fun (I am a huge nerd and find comfort in researching and studying.) I also became a furry. I now draw athropomorphic art, and will start selling fursuits soon.

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#56

I got depression because of how short I am, and because I just lost my best friends # while a phone switch. I coped with it by pretending I'm in my own world and listening to sad music. I would and still, pretend I'm in a recording studio singing this while fiction characters watched in awe.

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#57

I was depressed from about 15 to 21 and I hated myself and the way I acted with other people. I used meditation as I was reading about Buddhism at the time anyway. I learned how to meditate (Naomi Humphrey's book - check it out) and selected one behaviour that I exhibited that I didn't like and meditated on that during a session. I went through different things and after about 6 months, I was more content with the kind of person I had then become. I highly recommend it as the drugs just mask it, but don't beat it.

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#58

The 10 Best-Ever Depression Management Techniques by Margaret Wehrenberg

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#59

Learning that the bad days don't invalidate the good days.
Having a bad/terrible day doesn't mean that all the good days were 'fake', 'wishful thinking' or just imagined, or not that great after all; no matter what my brain tried to tell me.
I turned my good days from an 'impossible to reach goal' into a safety net,
At the beginning, it might have not been a good day, but just a good moment. But that doesn't make them less valid. Moments have turned into days, and I am certain, that someday they will become weeks.

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#60

Trigger warning: Mentions self-harm, su*cide

Disclaimer: I didn't have clinical depression. I was assessed, but it wasn't "severe" enough. I was told that it couldn't be clinical since I didn't have any appetite/weight change. It took me awhile to realize that not being clinical didn't invalidate what I was feeling.

ANYWAY

I would say what really helped were two things:
1) God
Probably a really controversial answer. But it's true. God said do not murder, (Ex. 20:13) and that includes myself. He also said I am his child, (John 1:12-13)and he knows the plans he has for me (Jer. 29:11). Who am I to say when it is time for me to die? He said my body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, (1 Cor. 6:19-20)who am I to cause harm to it? I trust God to make those decisions for me, and that trust in him saved me from cutting and suicide. So even though bad thoughts were in my head, God's commands and promises gave me something to hold on to.
2) Counselling.
I found an amazing councillor. All that first point probably makes it sound like I'm one of those miracle-healer-prosperity-gospel people, but part of taking care of my body is taking care of my mind. After like three weeks I got in touch with a certified counsellor, signed a no-harm contract, and began my 4-month recovery. I don't think I could have done it without her. She was so good. I did cognitive-behavioral therapy, CBT, and learned a lot of stuff. I am able to pick out spiraling, black-and-white, and generalizing/catastrophizing thoughts, and I 100% recommend CBT to anyone and everyone, depressed or no.

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#61

music or movies help me

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#62

1) Interrupt the depression-thought patterns - TheTappingSolution.com - NO drugs and FREE

2) I practice #Gratitude by listing things that I am so fortunate to be grateful for --like food; running water; a home; heat; and so many things that people just a few miles away in NYC and around the world do NOT have. I start with #Gratitude for My health.

3) Put on some feel-good music and DANCE! Immediate boost of endorphins and good exercise!

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