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Nobody deserves being rejected. First off, the world is cruel enough. And second, there’s a fair share of karma involved in it. If you ever reject someone, the chances are the same thing will come to you as a boomerang when you least expect it. In a parallel reality, everyone would have a reciprocal “It’s a match!”

But being told ‘sorry’ by your love interest is surely much more complex than that. And the best way to take a glimpse into humanity’s hurt souls is to look at what people have to say themselves.

So when Twitter user Eden Dranger posed the question “What was your harshest rejection?” it resonated with many, amassing 4,173 retweets and 67.6K likes.

So let’s get ready for a brutal, yet sometimes funny, other times plain odd, roller coaster ride featuring the stories of rejection as told by the ones who know what they’re saying.

#2

Emberrassing-Rejection-Stories

SueZieCue Report

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Alison
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wow 😳 that was a close call. Sorry to hear about the wife though being beat up. Awful to think about what happens behind closed doors

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To find out more about dealing with harsh rejection, Bored Panda reached out to Kate Mansfield, an acclaimed dating and relationship coach based in London, UK. Kate told that the way rejection psychologically affects us vary from person to person. “Rejection can have a profound or a mild effect, depending on the psychological state, the past trauma, and the personality of the person,” she explained.

“At its worst, it can cause extreme feelings of worthlessness and even depression. It can cause the person to withdraw from relationships and to stay alone. Or, to feel not good enough and low self-esteem.”

Meanwhile, people with healthy self-esteem and confidence, are usually mildly affected. This is “because they have a solid sense of self-worth already,” Kate explained.

When asked about the ways to deal with being rejected, Kate suggested working on your self-esteem and understanding that it’s nothing to do with you, and usually, it’s not personal.

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“Try to feel grateful, because the one thing worse than being rejected is to stay in a relationship with someone who doesn't really love you. That is rejection on a daily basis, and causes extreme loneliness.”

#7

Emberrassing-Rejection-Stories

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WilvanderHeijden
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Let's just hope that they are able to put him behind bars for his part in the siege of the capitol.

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#8

Emberrassing-Rejection-Stories

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Joonscrab
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You just dodged a bullet lolll if he can't handle a person having an extra few pounds, then that's on him.

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#10

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Catherine
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Haha this one made me laugh! Luckily, you were overqualified and clearly meant for bigger things in life

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Whatever people say, rejection hurts. Bottom line. It doesn’t matter which point of a relationship you’re at—being told "I am sorry, but" is something none of us want to hear. Emotional responses by anyone who’s experienced it are confirmed by researchers, and they range from feeling jealous to anxious and lonely.

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But since rejection has a lot to do with self-worth and self-image, oftentimes the pain of it is directly linked to how you validate yourself. Often people look for external and not internal forces to feel validated, which makes them vulnerable to setbacks. What if we simply haven't learned to love ourselves enough?

#14

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Being rejected by someone you love can really turn even the strongest of us into emotional train wrecks. But in many cases, we tend to idealize both the person and the relationship, as we only remember good times and emotions.

Such behavior is usually unconscious, but it nevertheless doesn’t show the full picture of what you really feel hurt about.

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Interestingly, friendship rejections can often be even more painful than romantic ones. Beverly Flaxington, a life and career coach, says to remember that while a friendship’s end can be painful, it’s also normal for friends to come and go.

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On the other hand, if you still feel like you're missing that person and that friendship in your life, Lexington suggests “reaching out to see if the person wants to get together.” In fact, timing may be crucial as it gives a whole new perspective of the friendship and the people we surround ourselves with.

After some time has passed and if you find yourself missing that person and that friendship, Flaxington suggests reaching out to see if the person wants to get together. Timing is key here. Time can allow people to approach a friendship with a new perspective, she notes

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#21

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Sum Guy
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Sometimes you need people to be tough on you because family and friends might lie to you about how good you are

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Tiger Pearl
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Or maybe you are really really good, but the others were better. Keep practicing and better luck next time!

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Lili
Community Member
3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That's not an appropriate rejection lettter coming from an admission board. Maybe they should learn how to write polite official letter first before going harsh on applicants?

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Night Owl
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"I read many talented writers of rejection letters this application cycle. Unfortunately, you were not one of them. I hope you made other plans."

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Kathryn Baylis
Community Member
3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Another way of saying “Don’t quit your day job”. Brutal. Bet you ya successful published author now. If so, then rub their faces in it every chance you get.

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Dorothy Parker
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

They can't be serious. No esteemed institution would do that. That's an old joke.

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Tina Hugh
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You're the only other person on this thread using your common sense. I suddenly understand how Trump maintains his fanbase -- people will believe any damn thing. It's frightening

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Samantha Bing
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I call BS - Johns Hopkins University would not have written this, multiple words are cut out to make it false

el_dee_1 avatar
El Dee
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's important to be honest but that is often used as an excuse to be cruel and rude for their own amusement..

shead26 avatar
Steve
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

No nice way to say "You suck at what you do, look for another career"

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Marcellus the Third
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

No, this is just a (summary of a) standard, polite rejection letter ---- with the middle paragraph accidentally missing, "We had only X places so could take X candidates". I know somebody that did send out such an email (and only realized when her CCed boss pointed it out, so hastily sent an apology mail after that). It happens when the precise number isn't known (budget dependent) or privileged info. So if on paper, good luck the secretary will never know their error...

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Biljana Malesevic
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I once sent a novel to small publisher, which was accepted, or so I thought until I received a freaking bill for all the costs of printing, design, lectoring etc for me to finance my own novel, and I will get all the copies to distribute and sell myself... I was like, why the hell would I need you then? Sometimes, rejection is not far from something that only looks like accepting.

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catherine todd
Community Member
3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"Johns Hopkins?" what? What in the world possessed them to respond this way? Hope whoever wrote this, thinking they are so funny, got canned right quick.

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Diane Phillips-Herman
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

There were companies that didn't think The Beatles were good enough to sign, too.

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David Beaulieu
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I call shenanigans on this one. No one from JH has ever been that funny.

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Curry on...
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I wonder if that was the first response, or the "10th" after the author refused to accept rejection. If it was the first, that's pretty harsh.

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lara
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

How about this one: Dear Mr. Smith, you should be aware that someone is sending out horrible manuscripts, that are so bad they should be burned, in your name.

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Tina Hugh
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Do you people actually believe this happened? My God. Please do not vote in future elections

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AzKhaleesi
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wow apparently they don't have a professionalism course do they?

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Konpat
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That's fair. Don't waste your time trying to achieve something impossible. At least not at John Hopkins, I guess...

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Poppy
Community Member
3 years ago

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You dodged a big one. You came that much closer to being a John Hopkins alum. Art is inherent, it can't be taught. Some have it, some don't. You're better off girl.

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#22

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Dan Buczynski
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wow. Well f**k Kavanaugh and f**k your ex husband. I hope you've since found someone who appreciates a bad@$$ like you.

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Lili
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I really don't understand people who pay for their not-even-spouse's education, house, cars, etc... Like, are you out of your mind?

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According to Lori Gottlieb, M.F.T., psychotherapist, "When somebody rejects us, there's a very primal piece to it, which is that it goes against everything we feel like we need for survival."

But beyond the evolutionary standpoint, our responses to rejection vary greatly as they really depend on the models in which we develop our relationships with people. Those with insecure attachment styles in contrast to secure ones are likely to experience much greater pain from rejection.

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#27

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Vic
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That's not a rejection, that's cheating! He was not your boyfriend, and she definitely was not your best friend.

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#29

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Pungent Sauce
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Stripping is sex work, and a lot of guys have difficulty separating the fantasy woman from the actual human being. Not excusing this jackass in any way, but as in most any job it’s best to not date the customers/clientele.

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#30

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