Most of us say "yes" when asked if we want to hear the truth. And it seems like a good idea at first that will ultimately help us improve and become our best. But there’s something about having it shoved in our face that is so unbearably revolting, only the most courageous dare to swallow it.

Thanks to the redditor who posted the question “What is an absolute truth that no one wants to hear?” on r/AskReddit and received 11.8k comments, we now know what people hold as some of the most difficult truths. So hold on tight, ‘cause it ain’t gonna be an easy ride, and you won’t surely have a place to hide.

You have an option to either endure them and survive the post, becoming a better self, or to ignore them and move on. Whatever you choose, I feel you. No one was born ready to come to terms with things like “Just because someone is related to you doesn't mean they are a good person” and “It is possible to make no mistakes and still lose.” And I mean it.

#1

Just because someone is related to you doesn't mean they are a good person.

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lenka
Community Member
5 months ago

Ot that you have to accept being abused and mistreated by them. You are allowed to walk away from people who are toxic.

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#2

Don't believe everything you think.

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Amy Pattie
Community Member
5 months ago

This one should be at the top, everyone should understand this.

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#3

“It is possible to make no mistakes and still lose. That is not failure that is life.”

-Captain Jean Luc Picard

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Hans
Community Member
5 months ago

And not accepting this is very depressing. Accepting this is very hard, though.

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Getting people to see what’s right in front of their face is not easy. This is largely due to the fact that we, as humans, hate hearing the truth. It’s especially true when we are dealing with truths that involve something we need to improve or work on.

To find out more about why so many of us don’t feel comfortable around hard-to-swallow truths, Bored Panda reached out to Susan Petang, a certified life coach who runs The Quiet Zone Coaching. Susan is helping those who struggle with stress find relief, manage their fears, and build self-confidence so they can wake up happy in the morning.

Susan said that if the truth is something we don’t agree with, it will be uncomfortable to hear it because it all has to do with our core beliefs and values, and the way we view the world. “When what we believe to be true about ourselves, situations, other people, or the world, in general, is at odds with what we observe, the result is cognitive dissonance—when our beliefs and our observations are at odds. This can cause considerable stress,” she explained.

#4

Life is easier for attractive people.

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Titas Burinskas
BoredPanda Staff
5 months ago

Life is easier for attractive people where attractiveness plays a factor in life. But the same can go with any merit. I.e. Life is easier for smarter people where smarts are concerned. Life is just easier when you have merits.

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#5

Vaccines don’t cause autism.

They help stop the spread of the disease. They are not a cure, the just allow you to have a lower chance to catch the virus, which helps lower the chances of the virus spreading.

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EA
Community Member
5 months ago

PREACH 🙌🏻

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#6

There is no inherent justice in this world.

Bad things will happen to good people, and good things will happen to bad people.

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Scyth
Community Member
5 months ago

This. Realizing this is a part of growing up.

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However, one has to be aware that perception can be an issue here too. “So, what I have experienced as 'truth' may not be what you have experienced as 'truth.' For example, one could say that the truth is that water boils at 212 degrees. Or does it? If you use the metric system, water boils at 100 degrees.”

Susan said that even though these two are the same, the perception, the semantics come across differently, and “what one individual might experience as truth wouldn't be truth to someone else.”

Susan warns that when you’re telling people something they don’t want to hear, it’s going to sound like a criticism. She suggests keeping that in mind and not being surprised if you get perceived as the one launching an attack.“

#7

If you didn't vote but could have done so, you have no right to complain about our elected officials.

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RaroaRaroa
Community Member
5 months ago

Yes!

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#8

No-one wants to hear your [crappy] music in public, especially in class.

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troufaki13
Community Member
5 months ago

Or in public transportation

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#9

Having an opinion doesn't make you right.

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Amy Pattie
Community Member
5 months ago

I mean, the bubonic plague never went away, we just have treatment for it now.

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That being said, the first step is to remember kindness and the Golden Rule. How would you want to be told that something you believe isn't true?” Susan suggests thinking about your tone in communication, which should be kind, respectful, and encouraging.

Moreover, you may use reflective listening. “For example, you could say, 'It sounds like you see grass as pink,' or 'I'm hearing that you think crocodiles make great pets.' You can also add, 'Tell me how you came to that conclusion,' or 'I'm curious as to how you formed that opinion.'"

Susan encourages using expressions like "It sounds like..." "I'm hearing that..." "You seem to feel..." "I'm noticing that..."It’s also important to phrase the truth in a way that doesn’t undermine others.

And also, it's important to agree to disagree, since “even after you have (calmly!) stated the truth, someone else still might not accept it,” she concluded.

#10

2021 will not magically be better than 2020.

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WilvanderHeijden
Community Member
5 months ago

Seeing the ways things are going I guess that people will think 2020 was much better than 2021.

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#11

Just because you’ve done something wrong in the past, doesn’t mean you can’t advocate against it.

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Niko Alarcon
Community Member
5 months ago

This is what some people need to hear. I 100% agree with this statement, some of us dont know the harm we've done until later, but it doesnt mean its too late to prevent others from making the same mistake.

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#12

As long as we fail to protect and provide for all children in our society, we will continue to suffer the crimes of the damaged adults we produce. We have no right to expect any different, and we deserve everything that we get.

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RaroaRaroa
Community Member
5 months ago

Anyone who complains about people receiving benefits from the government needs to consider this. If we don't help them, their children have NO chance of doing better. We'd end up with people living in gated communities, hiding from the other part of society, afraid to go out. Parts of the world all ready live like that. I hope we never do.

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Mark Murphy, the author of "Truth At Work: The Science Of Delivering Tough Messages," suggests that cognitive dissonance is to blame. It occurs when someone holds two psychologically inconsistent beliefs (or attitudes or opinions) that create unpleasant mental tension.

Murphy explains: “If you've ever been in a conversation with someone who just couldn't, or wouldn't, hear the truth, no matter how many ways you tried to explain it, or who reacted so badly to the truth that you regretted saying anything at all, you've likely witnessed someone who was experiencing cognitive dissonance.”

This is because such a reaction is a way of lessening psychological tension and reducing anxiety when people face something that contradicts their existing beliefs, attitudes, and opinions.

In reality, no human brain would ever enjoy receiving information that doesn’t help ourselves in the sense that it makes our lives more difficult or threatens our self-esteem, status, and public image. And it seems that the saying “truth hurts” wasn’t born out of nowhere.

#13

People don't think about you anywhere near as much as you think they do.

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RaroaRaroa
Community Member
5 months ago

Ahh, but to the socially anxious, we still cringe over something dumb we said to someone 20 years ago. Something they no doubt forgot within a week.

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#14

You're supposed to care deeply about the things in your own life, and other people not caring about them doesn't make them less important.

This is one of the things Instagram culture has taken away from us -- the idea that you're doing great even if nobody likes the photos of the breakfast you made or knows who you are.

For most of human history, most of our emphasis and energy was spent on our families and immediate communities. Now we're all flailing to "matter" to a bunch of strangers we probably wouldn't like in person and it's wrecking our brains.

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WilvanderHeijden
Community Member
5 months ago

Except for the few that have discovered that life without Fakebook, Instagram and Twitter is much more enjoyable.

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#15

No matter how nice you are, people will still just be a**holes to you just cuz.

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WilvanderHeijden
Community Member
5 months ago

Some people will. It's not that all the people are a**holes all the time but you do get to meet the inevitable jerk or bitch, no matter how nice you are. It's up to you to decide if they are going to dictate how you interact with people. It still does take more muscles to frown than to smile.

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#16

Just because someone is related to you, doesn't mean you have to like or tolerate them. Sometimes for people, friends are your true family because they accept you for who you are. They choose to stick around with you. Not because they have to.

I don't speak to my abusive father and never will again, nor his side of the family. I'm estranged from one of my sisters already and I don't like most of my extended family. I do not appreciate their morals.

You won't lose much at all by cutting some family ties (circumstances depend though, ofc). You'll be much happier in the long run once you establish your life, who you are and what you need/want for your future.

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yosemity sam
Community Member
5 months ago

That'll be my life in a couple of years and it's the only thing keeping me going.

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#17

Life isn’t fair and you aren’t owed a damn thing.

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Kim
Community Member
5 months ago

Well everyone deserve a chance.

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#18

Civil debate is a must. You gotta stay respectful, open-minded, and civil, even if you loathe the views of the other side with a passion.

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Scyth
Community Member
5 months ago

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This is what's wrong with blm.

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#19

Even though you think your kids are special, they are most likely just average.

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Amy Pattie
Community Member
5 months ago

But everyone’s kids are special to them, and that is why love is so important.

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#20

You can’t make everyone happy.

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troufaki13
Community Member
5 months ago

First person we should make happy is ourselves.

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#21

After a generation or two after your death, no one alive will have any memories of you. Your life, everything you did, and all of your struggles and achievements will all be forgotten. You’ll just be another one of the billions of forgotten souls whose names, faces, and life stories have all been lost to time.

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Amy Pattie
Community Member
5 months ago

I find this fact really comforting

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#22

You need to have your views challenged.

Being around and positively engaging with people who disagree with you is one of the healthiest intellectual practices we can do.

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Scyth
Community Member
5 months ago

Unfortunately the mainstream media is heavily against this idea.

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#23

You can't control what happens to you, only how you react to it.

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troufaki13
Community Member
5 months ago

Exactly. If you put a potato and an egg in boiling water (same circumstances) one becomes soft and the other becomes hard.

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#24

Just because you helped someone doesn't mean they are going to help you. People are ungrateful more often than not.

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lenka
Community Member
5 months ago

Yes, this is true. But did you help them because you expected something in return, or did you help them simply because they were in need? I get that it still hurts, but refer to truth above - you can't control what other people do. Only your response.

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#25

You cannot go through life without experiencing some type of pain/discomfort. Physical and emotional. It is necessary for growth.

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Scyth
Community Member
5 months ago

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There go the safe spaces.

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#26

Things are going to keep getting worse on our planet and we are in for some serious human tragedy.

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Hans
Community Member
5 months ago

This is not universally true. In fact, many things are improving, at least when looked in decaded. Scientific progress. The fight of hunger (despite negative effects through corona). Medicine. People believing it ought to be worse anyway are a major contributor to it becoming worth, because, why should they care if they are doomed anyway?

Monday
Community Member
5 months ago

Looking at the big picture, we are doomed anyway. Eventually the planet is going to die, people are going to die out, but we can influence how fast that happens.

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Iapetos
Community Member
5 months ago

Tragedy in general. Wouldn't be a problem if we all were 1. Vegan and minimalist 2. following Celibacy or 3. dead. I prefer number 1, but also in modern Western society, life is difficult without producing huge piles of garbage and having a giant carbon footprint :(

Henry Cheves
Community Member
5 months ago

Alright, I agree, but the Homo Sapiens Sapiens(yes, that's supposed to be there twice, it is our sub species) are actually omnivores naturally, so vegan is hard for us to do.

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Lauren Caswell
Community Member
5 months ago

Like agent Smith says in the matrix, humans are a virus, spreading and multiplying and leaving damage behind. If we continue being a parasite to earth rather than a symbiote it's not gna end well for humans :(

Saico Hipe
Community Member
5 months ago

Humans are not a virus. Capitalism and colonialism are the disease at work here. Lots of indigenous folks managed to live in stewardship of the earth and not drive the human race into ruin with unchecked greed. Blame the 1% ruling class which controls the vast majority of material wealth on earth and creates the vast majority of pollution, carbon emission, hunger, lack of access to health care, lack of housing, war, and general suffering. Never ever buy into the ruling class's narrative that it is the fault of the 99%.

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Mari
Community Member
5 months ago

That's because Jesus is coming back...literally ALL the things talking about the End Times are being fulfilled and the book of Revelation was written 2000 years ago, and some other books even more before that

bill marsano
Community Member
5 months ago

This means that progress should have stopped somewhere along the way. Care to pick a year? Go ahead--but ask yourself how you'd like the medical and dental care of that year, the civil liberties of that year, the employment prospects of that year. Then you'd have some perspective.

Martha Meyer
Community Member
5 months ago

This is definitely not true. Humanity has continually improved over time. It's just hard to see because we keep taking a step back for every two forward and the timeframes are too long for a single human to see the big picture easily within his/her lifetime.

fuggnuggins
Community Member
5 months ago

It's quite likely that humanity will fail at some point. Before that, humanity may come close to the brink. Many times. It seems likely to me that it has happened in the past. I think Olaf Stapledon was the author of a novel called First and Last Men that considers this topic. It's a good book, if maybe a bit drawn-out towards the end. Also, considering that we are a branch on the same tree as other primates, and even of other hominids that are now extinct and in which humans may have had some role, it's not hard to imagine what the future might bring. Especially now that we are on the verge of creating a new species of human - the trans-human. You think that disparity is bad today? Imagine what it will be like for humans who have to live under actual living, perhaps even immortal, gods and demigods, which is what AI, prosthetics, longevity science, perhaps also Quantum Computing (even Intellectual Property playing a role, isolating most from major advantages), will usher in shortly.

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Octavia Hansen
Community Member
5 months ago

Nature is not kind. Civilizations have a point of blooming, then wilting. Mankind is notorious for hind-sight.

Ivan Martin
Community Member
5 months ago

As numbers keep rising things will get worse

Stannous Flouride
Community Member
5 months ago

A mutated virus is just one of the many tragedies we face.

Nicolas Pilot
Community Member
5 months ago (edited)

Thank you for the prophetic insight. Regardless, please give my best regards to your illuminati friends :p

Norah Reilly
Community Member
5 months ago

Some tragedy maybe, and, I believe that every moment of every day we all have a choice about how we feel, what we think, and most importantly, what we do about it.

Astrid Nineor
Community Member
5 months ago

https://www.bbc.com/future/article/20190111-seven-reasons-why-the-world-is-improving

Tiny Dynamine
Community Member
5 months ago

I'm still hoping for our extinction (humans only).

Don Quixote
Community Member
1 month ago

You first

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Tor Rolf Strøm
Community Member
5 months ago (edited)

This is an opinion, not a truth. No-one knows what will happen in the future.

Chris Challis
Community Member
1 month ago

Nothing new. civilizations have risen and fallen for milennia. If we disrespect Mother Earth she will find a way to kick us off. Start again...Human tragedy has always been...

Wouldn't You Like to Know
Community Member
3 months ago

Well, are you just a happy little ray of sunshine

serge
Community Member
4 months ago

I agree. There is food shortage as it is, drinking water is at a premium and those two will be the reason for serious problems with migration and wars. We might be able to do something about global warming but unless we stop the human race from reproducing it will all be for nothing in the end. It is called looking at things realistically. I do whatever is in my power to help my planet but it just doesn't seem to be enough. It's like carrying water to the ocean, futile.

David Gripon
Community Member
5 months ago

.....and then the return of Jesus.

Lynda Gutierrez
Community Member
5 months ago

UNLESS things change.

Wouldn't You Like to Know
Community Member
5 months ago (edited)

Yep, read the Bible, I know how it ends.

Terd Fergison
Community Member
5 months ago

The bible is riddled with scientific errors, contradictions, bad morality (endorsing slavery and rape), failed prophecies, and some just plain stupidity (it tells you that if you want striped cattle and goats, put them in front of striped things when they are mating and they will produce striped offspring. That’s not how genetics works!). Why should we trust the bible?

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Steve Barker
Community Member
5 months ago

Left strictly to humans that is sadly correct. Fortunately, there will be a massive intervention. Watch for religion to be destroyed/outlawed/done away with. At that time the earth has only moments to live.

Terd Fergison
Community Member
2 months ago

Let’s look at the bible logically. The bible claims god is a perfect being who is all-knowing, all-powerful, all good, is eternal (always existed) and has a divine plan. If god is a perfect being and is eternal (always existed), then he was perfectly happy & perfectly content for an infinite amount of time in the past. From there why create anything? Not logical. Doesn’t make sense. A perfect being becomes discontent & needs to create something, so creates the cosmos & he creates angels. At least one of those angels betrays him. If he’s all knowing with a divine plan, how did he not see this coming an infinity away? Then he creates Eve & Eve betrays him. How did he not see this coming an infinity away? Then sin and evil take over the world. Why not stop evil? He’s all-powerful. He floods a world, saying that it will stop evil. But, it doesn’t. Buffoonish. Laughably incompetent. It’s a comedy of errors. Then we’re to think he gets things right with jesus? Evil still exists.

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Ojberretta Berretta
Community Member
5 months ago

thats just an opinion

Scyth
Community Member
5 months ago

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"Human tragedy" not environmental. Humans are incapable of seriously damaging mother nature.

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#27

We don't know everything and probably never will.

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Amy Pattie
Community Member
5 months ago

There will always be more mystery, and that’s the way I like it

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#28

So many of these are negative... So how about the truth that one of the best ways to be happy in life is by helping other people. People don't want to do it, because helping other people feels like you're losing out, but it's true.

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RaroaRaroa
Community Member
5 months ago

How does it feel like you're losing out? It always gives me a happy feeling.

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#29

It’s okay to be selfish sometimes.

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Tor Rolf Strøm
Community Member
5 months ago

Yes yes, it's okay to be all the animals in the sea.

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#30

Everyone's a hypocrite. Even you.

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Kim
Community Member
5 months ago

Not true. Hard pill to swallow: Some people are actually genuine and true.

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