Does the Loch Ness Monster really exist? What happened to the crew of Mary Celeste? And what are guys up to when they're taking long showers? While we might never find out the answers to the first two mysteries, the latter has just been revealed. Together with a bunch of other men secrets most girls probably have no clue about. Recently, someone on reddit asked "What Are Some 'Guy Secrets' Girls Don't Know About?" and it got funnier and funnier with every answer. Amassing over 80K upvotes in just a few days, this post has become sort of like a diary of the 21st century man, and you couldn't make this stuff up. Scroll down to check out the entries and upvote your faves!
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"We are task orientated" absolutely true! we respond better with, "can you get me a blanket?" our brain process that faster than "I'm cold" statement.
I suspect a reasonable percentage of women would not know this. Good advice.
Honestly, I know it, but I think moms still think of their sons as babies.....for real I'm sitting here going "so THAT'S why my 14 yo boy takes so much time coming downstairs in the morning" because I'm aware of it, but my brain hasn't yet adapted to it being an issue for HIM.
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I would suggest never rushing into your kid's room regardless, as they could be naked or masturbating or something they'd be embarrassed about.
I strongly advise never rushing into a teenage boy's room for any reason! Make as much noise as you can walking down the hall before you knock on his door, then say something through the door if necessary. Never, ever open the door without plenty of warning!!
As a Mom of 2 boys, 19 and 12, I know all about morning wood, but it starts as a baby and never seems to stop. Who cares though, accept that theyre boys and let them have their personal space. Also, being open and factual about their bodies has help my boys not to be ashamed or embarrassed about themselves, it's helped to keep them happy and healthy in all body matters.
This is actually helpful advice. Never having had brothers I would have not ever thought of this.
I always thought the baggy pants the young boys wear, are held up with boners.
I just knock & shout! No way I need traumatising & neither does he. I don't just walk into my daughter's room either, girls have secrets too! Plus teenagers' rooms are not a place I want to be unless it is 100% necessary!
As an insomniac, I've always found it easier to sleep in the nude. There's just less to worry about, like extra wrinkles between pajamas and sheets or the legs of the pajamas twisting themselves around my legs. I honestly don't understand how people can sleep in clothes. Anyway, just to take this advice a step further than "don't rush into his room and demand that he get up immediately," I'd like to add "don't throw the curtains open to the whole world and tear your sons sheets off the bed, while singing at the top of your lungs. It's no wonder I'm so f****d up.
Once the curtains are open it doesn't matter what happens with the sheet, you are either going to have to stagger to the window & close the curtains half asleep & half mast in order to get dressed or develop the ability to dress using the force, or just become a full time naturist & go stand in the window scratching your balls at your neighbours like the creepy dude across the street from me?!
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oof, I had this discussion like a million f****n times with my wife, until finally I told her, "Soooo, your inability to process this as a real thing means that there exists the possibility, if not the probability that every time my son's d**k gets hard, he will have a flash of his mom bolting through the door and BAM, erectile disorder, capiche ''n s**t?" She suddenly learned to knock.
I wouldn't do this to my kids anyway, because it's really rude to barge into someone's bedroom and start yelling at them. If your kid is old enough to do chores, they are old enough that you should knock on the door. If they don't get up after a couple minutes, knock again, and then slowly open the door. Gently and respectfully call them out of sleep. Let them get up, get dressed, and eat breakfast. Then you let them know what chores they are responsible for, and above and beyond that, what they can do extra to help out. You do all of this respectfully. Your boss at work would never speak to you that way and they pay you (and if they DO speak to you like that, then your boss is toxic with a personality disorder or something and you should probably report them for creating a hostile environment or at least search for a different job). Respect your kids. There doesn't have to be a special reason such as his one. Just respect them, male or female.
How does this not have more upvotes?! I wish everyone in the fkn world read this. You are so spot on. Especially boys with morning wood (sorry for the vulgarity) but of course girls deserve the same respect. My goddd thank you for this comment!
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Lmao because I just remembered a friend that always said "morning wood" to my dog (who's name is Woody) when he woke up :'D
Yes, i'm 38 and no signs of stopping, depends what you are doing, if you just lie there and wait until it goes down probably a couple of minutes, if you get up and go for a p**s it will go away sooner.
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Thanks, I have a son and generally throw the dog in his bedroom first thing in the morning... Now rethinking this practice... maybe this is how furries are made...
The gasp of sudden realization followed by a squeal of laughter nearly scared my husband to frustration (he's driving and thought I'd gasped because of something in the road haha). Guess you'll know what's up if he starts looking at the dog dreamily over breakfast.
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Even if you have a girl give her 5 minutes, cause that is just decent politeness. No one should have to hopp out of bed the second a parent runs into their room.
I'll be honest, I was expecting this to go someplace else but yeah, good point.
Great advice. I don't have kids, but I would think you have to respect your children, just as much as you want respect from them. And to give them some space. This situation is a prime example. We woman complain about our periods but dealing with an erection during inopportune times has the potential to be pretty embarrassing.
My mom walked in on me once when I was wanking, funny I didn't feel embarrassed but she sure did. Barry! she exclaimed and walked away, When I came out she was so apologetic and sorry. My dad walked in on me once, shrugged chuckled and left.
This is hilarious and honestly true. I'm a girl and my mom practically breaks down my door and says "GET UP YOU HAVE PLACES TO BE" like OK just gimme a minute to actually wake up so I can process the words coming out of your mouth and then repeat
totally agree......... morning erection means u'rs, ours is working in good (healthy)
In your mother's general direction, a mother seeing her son at full salute, NO thank you.
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Oops.. I'm afraid I'm guilty of that a couple of times.. Sorry, Mike..
I have two sons. I walk in their rooms, wake them up and walk out. 10 minutes later I will take their coffee to them. I never ever rush them to get up before coffee. BUT if they do not get up after I have taken their coffee, I will turn into a monster...
This is solid (no pun intended) advice. My son is going on 13 years old. I don't think of things like this. Noted.
Lucky you. I had my hairdresser tell me I looked like a junkie because I had let my hair grow out. Needless to say I didn't visit her again.
This is no secret, those who do this are heroes and are celebrated.
I laughed at this for way too long, because I can't think of a single time I tied something down and didn't say that.
And it also smells nice. I think shampoo smells better than most of the expensive perfumes.
true! even for those of us who are short. We will jump just to fulfill our primal instinct
It's good to have open conversations about men's insecurities and issues too, and there always needs to be mutual open communication in a relationship, regardless of whether that's a male/female or male/male or female/female relationship because people are different and express themselves and their needs differently
It really is so important. Sadly, there are still a lot of people out there who mock this sort of thing, and it makes me so sad. We're all human beings, we all deserve the same right to express our feelings without fear.
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We are often ashamed of showing emotion because it's been used against us in the past. "He cries! lol. What a weakling." We go to the bathroom and cry, letting out emotion in solitude and come back with extra Machismo to mask it.
This makes me so mad/sad. I am middle-aged and even in my childhood it was considered normal for girls and boys to cry and show emotions. How can it be that a generation later men still have to deal with being allowed to act HUMAN? :(
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Also I think, I'm not sure, but I think most men want to be a hero, whether it's in a symbolic or a literal sense, we want the chance to be redeemable and respected. The chance to come to someones aid, to defend someones honor, to save the day - it sounds a bit wanky and can apply to women as well, but there's something to it I think
For years, I've wanted a flight attendant to come out and ask the passengers if anyone can land a plane. I would be there so fast!
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I was expecting more brutal truths. But glad to see the fraternity stayed strong! ;)
i would have LOVED to see some brutal truths--some of us actually learn from them
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I think one of the greatest "secret" I've learned about men is that they get anxious about starting a family as well. In my culture, there is this whole scheme they feed you, that you as a woman should procreate no-matter what, that you are worth only your reproductive capability, besides you have a shelf-life, etc. etc. I guess it just never occurred to me that men could possibly get worried about such a thing.
My husband never tells me he liked my food. I have to watch and when he takes seconds, it means he likes it. But if he just finishes his plate and doesn't take seconds, it doesn't mean that he didn't like it, it can also mean that he just isn't that hungry, that he ate too many cookies and ruined his apetite, or that he is in a hurry and will take seconds later in the evening, or that he was just thinking about going to the loo, or that he sees a blue elephant, or.......
I need whatever ingredient you used which made him see blue elephants.
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To be fairly honest, I'm a woman and can still relate to some of these, like the ones about zoning off and thinking about opening a brewery in the middle of nowhere and the story about the T-rex. Also, the two drops rule ending up on your pants is valid for both sexes. Not having toilet paper at hand(because someone else finished it and didn't put a new roll)sucks.
I loved this post. Sometimes you guys seem so sure and unassailable, that I feel superfluous. It's very very nice to hear sometimes that what's going on in your head is actually pretty similar. And that you also worry if we like you back and stuff. (And that it doesn't matter that I cut my hair) And just to share, I had an American boyfriend once and he was always raised with the idea that men and women were fundamentally different. We're not. We're all human first and are insecure and shy and trip and stuff. Only after that comes the gender thing. And even though I knew it, you still tend to overlook it. That's why it's nice to see posts like this from time to time. And trust us, we usually operate on the premise that you aren't attracted to us. Please let us know, only take care of where so if the girl turns out to be mean you have a buffer. Also most of us dislike the high maintenance b****y girls too, don't judge us all by their a*s backwards behaviour. Thanks!
It's very true. I was raised with 'men are from Mars, women are from Venus' where really it should be "The solar system is big and empty, all life is amazing'"
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I'm so fed up of this 'be obvious' bs. Your wives and girlfriends are not your carers, mothers or nurses. If you see something needs doing, do it. You do not need to be asked. Some men like to hide behind a wall of 'stupidity' in order to get out of things. 'You're better at it than me anyway' or 'I'd just do it wrong so you should do it' etc etc. You are not idiots, but have been conditioned by society to act this way.
I think I explained 500 times not to mix whites with colors when he does the laundry. His answer is always: then do it yourself. Gives him an excuse not to do it at all.... But then next time same thing happens...
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Aww. .... If you were here you'd get the biggest hug ever!
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Im older and I used to be fit, my hair used to be black,I had no wrinkles,etc. I know it happens to us all but no matter how I work out the skin still isnt youthful any longer. I eat/drink healthy and I have still gotten cellulite now. Im still adjusting and some compliments from her would go so far. Believe me I know what my issues are but Id like for everyone else to pretend theyre not there or Im just being OCD.
Quite curious how a lot of these comments are along the lines of "women, change how you communicate, so that we don't have to."
And if the post was 'women tell men things they don't know' it would probably be reversed..
Load More Replies... I feel like a hero when i fix something she asked me to.The more witnesses the better.
Women need to learn where the guys G Spot is.... and no its not what you think. This will take the guy to a whole new level. Ask your guy..... and if he doesnt know..... prostate ladies prostate.....
I like the aroma of your own body, not the perfume's or the deodorant's
Most men can't stand reality soaps (TOWIE, Geordie Shore, Made In Chelsea etc), and even more men think the cast are not worthy of the status of "celeb". And they're not. They're famous for what, exactly. On the flip side... Dangermouse and Bagpuss? Legends.
Wow @tjler sounds like you got run over by angry femdomme with pms and kicked to the curb for being too pussy and moany. Issues much?
We are NOT mind readers! You need something? Ask for it! Want to say something? SAY it! "Something wrong, hun?" Don't say no if it's the opposite! For me, No and nothing realy means NO and NOTHING.
Reading the responses from women to these, it's clear why so many men are starting to be happy being single. You're all showing your toxic femininity.
So good to know, though we're on a break ,really hoping that I could kiss him back
These are kinda funny and kinda sad, but true of most of the men I've known. Basically we're all just people and the same things.
a lot of these should be common sense--times have changed from the male of the 40s-50s that didn't share their feelings or cook or have more involvement in raising their kids. a lot of these can be said for males as well as females--like, stop hinting and just ask for what you want. Men are people too & need compliments & affirmations just like women do. Give me a man that's not afraid to open up & be himself around me ANY day!
No advise/comment/how girls should react on the famous " I'm naked , but your d**k is sleeping" or the "how come that you finished if I didn't even started ?". On a way that don't hurt men's
Everybody saying “its a ppl thing” just shut up. Having these men express their “secrets” are actually pretty awesome and having u s**t on it saying “ohh duhh me too!” is aggravating. This is about them FOR ONCE. Damn it🙄
This is a social media site where people are sharing their own experiences for solidarity's sake and to show men that "hey you're not alone in this, everyone does this" because it can make you feel alone and misunderstood if you feel like people can't understand where you come from. So I don't understand how it's s******g on it to say "me too" when this is a social media site where people are supposed to share their thoughts and experiences??
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Ga away you annoying f**k. People like you keep the problem going. It's not pitied and not gentle it's finding common ground. If you're so narrow minded you can't see that just go away
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"Women think and assume too much." → talking about assumptions....
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It's good to have open conversations about men's insecurities and issues too, and there always needs to be mutual open communication in a relationship, regardless of whether that's a male/female or male/male or female/female relationship because people are different and express themselves and their needs differently
It really is so important. Sadly, there are still a lot of people out there who mock this sort of thing, and it makes me so sad. We're all human beings, we all deserve the same right to express our feelings without fear.
Load More Replies... We are often ashamed of showing emotion because it's been used against us in the past. "He cries! lol. What a weakling." We go to the bathroom and cry, letting out emotion in solitude and come back with extra Machismo to mask it.
This makes me so mad/sad. I am middle-aged and even in my childhood it was considered normal for girls and boys to cry and show emotions. How can it be that a generation later men still have to deal with being allowed to act HUMAN? :(
Load More Replies... Also I think, I'm not sure, but I think most men want to be a hero, whether it's in a symbolic or a literal sense, we want the chance to be redeemable and respected. The chance to come to someones aid, to defend someones honor, to save the day - it sounds a bit wanky and can apply to women as well, but there's something to it I think
For years, I've wanted a flight attendant to come out and ask the passengers if anyone can land a plane. I would be there so fast!
Load More Replies... I was expecting more brutal truths. But glad to see the fraternity stayed strong! ;)
i would have LOVED to see some brutal truths--some of us actually learn from them
Load More Replies... I think one of the greatest "secret" I've learned about men is that they get anxious about starting a family as well. In my culture, there is this whole scheme they feed you, that you as a woman should procreate no-matter what, that you are worth only your reproductive capability, besides you have a shelf-life, etc. etc. I guess it just never occurred to me that men could possibly get worried about such a thing.
My husband never tells me he liked my food. I have to watch and when he takes seconds, it means he likes it. But if he just finishes his plate and doesn't take seconds, it doesn't mean that he didn't like it, it can also mean that he just isn't that hungry, that he ate too many cookies and ruined his apetite, or that he is in a hurry and will take seconds later in the evening, or that he was just thinking about going to the loo, or that he sees a blue elephant, or.......
I need whatever ingredient you used which made him see blue elephants.
Load More Replies... To be fairly honest, I'm a woman and can still relate to some of these, like the ones about zoning off and thinking about opening a brewery in the middle of nowhere and the story about the T-rex. Also, the two drops rule ending up on your pants is valid for both sexes. Not having toilet paper at hand(because someone else finished it and didn't put a new roll)sucks.
I loved this post. Sometimes you guys seem so sure and unassailable, that I feel superfluous. It's very very nice to hear sometimes that what's going on in your head is actually pretty similar. And that you also worry if we like you back and stuff. (And that it doesn't matter that I cut my hair) And just to share, I had an American boyfriend once and he was always raised with the idea that men and women were fundamentally different. We're not. We're all human first and are insecure and shy and trip and stuff. Only after that comes the gender thing. And even though I knew it, you still tend to overlook it. That's why it's nice to see posts like this from time to time. And trust us, we usually operate on the premise that you aren't attracted to us. Please let us know, only take care of where so if the girl turns out to be mean you have a buffer. Also most of us dislike the high maintenance b****y girls too, don't judge us all by their a*s backwards behaviour. Thanks!
It's very true. I was raised with 'men are from Mars, women are from Venus' where really it should be "The solar system is big and empty, all life is amazing'"
Load More Replies... I'm so fed up of this 'be obvious' bs. Your wives and girlfriends are not your carers, mothers or nurses. If you see something needs doing, do it. You do not need to be asked. Some men like to hide behind a wall of 'stupidity' in order to get out of things. 'You're better at it than me anyway' or 'I'd just do it wrong so you should do it' etc etc. You are not idiots, but have been conditioned by society to act this way.
I think I explained 500 times not to mix whites with colors when he does the laundry. His answer is always: then do it yourself. Gives him an excuse not to do it at all.... But then next time same thing happens...
Load More Replies... Aww. .... If you were here you'd get the biggest hug ever!
Load More Replies... Im older and I used to be fit, my hair used to be black,I had no wrinkles,etc. I know it happens to us all but no matter how I work out the skin still isnt youthful any longer. I eat/drink healthy and I have still gotten cellulite now. Im still adjusting and some compliments from her would go so far. Believe me I know what my issues are but Id like for everyone else to pretend theyre not there or Im just being OCD.
Quite curious how a lot of these comments are along the lines of "women, change how you communicate, so that we don't have to."
And if the post was 'women tell men things they don't know' it would probably be reversed..
Load More Replies... I feel like a hero when i fix something she asked me to.The more witnesses the better.
Women need to learn where the guys G Spot is.... and no its not what you think. This will take the guy to a whole new level. Ask your guy..... and if he doesnt know..... prostate ladies prostate.....
I like the aroma of your own body, not the perfume's or the deodorant's
Most men can't stand reality soaps (TOWIE, Geordie Shore, Made In Chelsea etc), and even more men think the cast are not worthy of the status of "celeb". And they're not. They're famous for what, exactly. On the flip side... Dangermouse and Bagpuss? Legends.
Wow @tjler sounds like you got run over by angry femdomme with pms and kicked to the curb for being too pussy and moany. Issues much?
We are NOT mind readers! You need something? Ask for it! Want to say something? SAY it! "Something wrong, hun?" Don't say no if it's the opposite! For me, No and nothing realy means NO and NOTHING.
Reading the responses from women to these, it's clear why so many men are starting to be happy being single. You're all showing your toxic femininity.
So good to know, though we're on a break ,really hoping that I could kiss him back
These are kinda funny and kinda sad, but true of most of the men I've known. Basically we're all just people and the same things.
a lot of these should be common sense--times have changed from the male of the 40s-50s that didn't share their feelings or cook or have more involvement in raising their kids. a lot of these can be said for males as well as females--like, stop hinting and just ask for what you want. Men are people too & need compliments & affirmations just like women do. Give me a man that's not afraid to open up & be himself around me ANY day!
No advise/comment/how girls should react on the famous " I'm naked , but your d**k is sleeping" or the "how come that you finished if I didn't even started ?". On a way that don't hurt men's
Everybody saying “its a ppl thing” just shut up. Having these men express their “secrets” are actually pretty awesome and having u s**t on it saying “ohh duhh me too!” is aggravating. This is about them FOR ONCE. Damn it🙄
This is a social media site where people are sharing their own experiences for solidarity's sake and to show men that "hey you're not alone in this, everyone does this" because it can make you feel alone and misunderstood if you feel like people can't understand where you come from. So I don't understand how it's s******g on it to say "me too" when this is a social media site where people are supposed to share their thoughts and experiences??
Load More Replies... Ga away you annoying f**k. People like you keep the problem going. It's not pitied and not gentle it's finding common ground. If you're so narrow minded you can't see that just go away
Load More Replies... "Women think and assume too much." → talking about assumptions....
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