Bisexual 12-Year-Old Receives Support From A Guy He Least Expected, Remembers It For The Rest Of His Life
Coming out is tough. Coming out as a 12-year-old is social suicide. Liberating social suicide. When Rafi D’Angelo made his bisexuality public, the world turned against him and he didn’t have anyone by his side. It got so bad, Rafi even attempted suicide.
More info: Twitter
Image credits: rafidangelo
But right then, during one of the worst periods of his life, the boy made an unlikely ally who gave him the validation and support he so desperately needed. Now, many years later, Rafi publicly thanked the guy on Twitter and his emotional rollercoaster ride of a thread went viral.
Image credits: RafiDAngelo
Image credits: RafiDAngelo
Image credits: RafiDAngelo
Image credits: RafiDAngelo
Image credits: RafiDAngelo
Image credits: RafiDAngelo
Image credits: RafiDAngelo
Image credits: RafiDAngelo
Image credits: RafiDAngelo
Image credits: RafiDAngelo
Image credits: RafiDAngelo
Image credits: RafiDAngelo
Image credits: RafiDAngelo
Image credits: RafiDAngelo
Image credits: RafiDAngelo
Image credits: RafiDAngelo
Image credits: RafiDAngelo
Image credits: RafiDAngelo
Image credits: RafiDAngelo
Image credits: RafiDAngelo
Image credits: RafiDAngelo
Image credits: RafiDAngelo
Image credits: RafiDAngelo
If you’re someone who’s thinking about coming out, just remember, everyone should do it in their own time. You may feel under pressure to tell those close to you that you are lesbian, gay, or bisexual before you are ready. But according to Ditch The Label, you don’t have to. There are no obligations. Coming out is just about you. No one else. If you start to think about pleasing others, you might lose sight of what is really important – your happiness on your own terms.
And even though you may feel ready to come out, you may not feel you fit any particular “label.” Using terms like lesbian, gay, and bisexual is absolutely fine but there’s no need to identify as anything. But if you decide to do so, reading about how other people came out might give you that last bit of confidence to say the words that you need to say. RUComingOut is just one website with plenty of real-life stories as well as interviews from celebrities. Most people who come out go through the same anxieties and they experience very similar fears, so hearing how things turned out for others might be useful for you as well.
And when you are ready to come out, you don’t have to tell everyone straight away. Start by choosing one person who you trust more than anyone else – a friend, a sibling, a parent/guardian, or a teacher. Open up to that one person and take it from there. If you do it and things seem a thousand times easier, you’ll know you’re on the right track. Also, you’ll have someone you can talk to and ask for advice on how to come out to others.
Here’s what people had to say
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I'm not gay, but was the victim of an abusive mother at home and endless bullying at school and I was ready to pack it in when I was 15. Then a girl had moved into the area from Kansas. Unlike the other students, she liked me for me. She laughed at my jokes, let me hang out at her house, and picked me up at home so I didn't have to endure the abuses on the bus. Best part about it was, her father had some respect because he was boss to many of the other students parents. My bullies backed off and I was able to get through the majority of the rest of high school unscathed. I didn't tell her until 25 years later that she saved my life. She's my BFF and always will be. It just takes one person to save a life.
"It takes just one person to save a life" I like that statement, I like it a lot. Thank you for giving such a complex, yet simple phrase
Load More Replies...Wow, that is such a powerful story...And so incredibly heartbreaking that a 12-year-old would be ready to die because he is different.
Welcome to the world of being different in middle school
Load More Replies...This story is amazing. I know the feeling of being alone that fallows coming out. It's a hard time.
I am glad my (only) best friend accepted me when I came out as bisexual. I was scared of rejection, but she supports me so much. Even sometimes asks me about what I like about girls, what attracts me.... Firstly I was uncomfortable talking about this, cause I thought it would be disgusting and she would be weirded out, but said: "Look, you are my best friend. I love you with all my heart,. It's not disgusting for me, I myself talk with you about my sexual life, then why shouldn't I know what you like too. I know it's new for you being bi, but I won't judge you. And if someone has something u need to tell me." I am proud to have her in .my life. She makes it easier for me, to accept who I am
That is a true friend right there. Hold on to them tightly, because they are one in a million. :)
Load More Replies...what a blessing of a big brother. i hope those boys have had a wonderful, healthy, fulfilling life.
This story has renewed my faith in mankind I am so happy for you and I hope you live the best life
What a powerful and heartbreaking story. I am glad to know that there are powerful and caring allies like Quincy and Eunice our there. Nobody, and I repeat, nobody should every be bullied or abused for being different or not fitting someone’s definition of “normal.” I came out to my father and close family and it was one of the hardest things I did. I’m still not out to other family members or friends for fear of being treated differently, but I’m so glad for people who have the strength and courage to do so. I’m also glad for strong allies who love the LGTBQ+ community.
Come on, we have enough info to go on, lets find Quincy and Malcolm and thank them!
We'd all end up just sobbing and blubbering at poor Quincy and confusing tf outta him 😂
Load More Replies...that's an amazing, powerful story. i hope by sharing it others will speak up and become an ally for a kid they see struggling. i'm not a religious person, but if you claim you are, then you can't tell me that your God would agree with turning your back on one of his children.
Words cannot convey who happy I am that your suicide attempt wasn't successful. Blessings to you for coping and for thanking these two men.
I'll probably get some hate for this, but, hey, that's the world today. First off, I'm happy for the kid, really. I'm also happy to hear of the organization "Ditch the Label"... at last something that isn't taking over the world by shouting in your face. My absolute best friend in the world is gay...and I'm the only one that he's told. I tried to help him tell his mother, but it didn't work out so well. Anyways...I accept the guy 100%...I've got his back..what I DON'T accept is when he feels the need to graphically tell me of his experiences...I basically just need to shut him down...I don't want to hear it. Close friends always talk about who they're attracted to...I just can't 'identify' with what he''s telling me... (sexual conversations). I think that's the issue with a majority of heterosexual men...the gay "sexual" lifestyle is what is repugnant, and not the fact of "loving" someone the same sex. "Ditch" is a positive step for everyone
Interesting input. And while you apparently do get some hate, I personally don’t see anything wrong with your opinion. I don’t want to hear anyone‘s sex stories, regardless of their sexual orientation, and I think everyone has the right to speak up if someone forces a conversation upon them they’re uncomfortable with. As long as you don’t harrass or mistreat others because they‘re different, I‘m fine with whatever you personally think or feel about the topic of gay sex.
Load More Replies...heart breaking to hear people say such horrible things to a 12 year old boy. So grateful you met those two guys. Who knows, maybe god is real and sent them to you that day
Just be kind. That's all. You have no idea how much your smile the other day helped me. When I was feeling baaad and ugly.
to clarify; really bad... thinking suicide bad. post very bad evil parents , raping father. etc. ... "you" some stranger in the street. made me feel human again for long enough.
Load More Replies...God started April fools when he was like yo Abraham kill your son. Then just kidding! Just wanted to make sure you loved me jokes on you
Load More Replies...Feast of tabernacles was fun until returning home after missing two weeks of school in the beginning of the school year. Plus starts and ends on high holy days to be held like sabbath days. Also the forced amount of money my parents had to put away for the trip and werent suppose to bring any of it back on top of mandatory 20% tithe to the church. Fun times.
I just read a great single panel comic where a little kid asked the priest holding the bowl of contributions "How do you get this money up to Jesus?"
Load More Replies...That's why I come to this site. Stories like these. Stories that give you hope that maybe - just MAYBE - we are a species worth saving and that there are actually some decent, good people left in this world. Thank you!
Touching, beautiful and yes, they helped each other more than they could ever know! I hope someday they can meet again and rebond. What a beautiful story and remembrance.
good for you :) you've got an ally here as well. It's rare I hear anyone bisexual, much less a male, talk about their orientation. Takes real courage and real friends. I hope one day I'll have guts of steel like you.
In the sixth grade I was the lowest-status person in the whole school and I think it was because I had an enormous crush on another girl and couldn't hide it. Being 12 is so hard.
I've had a couple of friends come out to me a few were expected but a couple were a big surprise. But one friend when he approached me he asked if he could talk to me and I said sure. He said I wanted to tell you something but I'm not sure how to say it I stopped him and I said "I know you're gay" he looked at me in shock and was like How I've tried not to show it... and I said that's how I knew. He goes it doesn't bother you? I said no why should it you are still you.... He got the same reaction from a mutual friend and was surprised by our support which he relied on heavily when he came out to his father and brother who weren't supportive. Now over 20 years later his family has come around and he has been married to the love of his life for about a decade.
I ugly cried. My younger brother, who I adore, was in denial and kept himself closeted for so long. He joined the Coast Guard, got married, did everything he could do to shove his true self down. When he finally came out, he was so scared we, his family, would reject him. The opposite happened. I cried for joy that he was being his true self finally. My mother was "meh, you are my baby boy, love is love". That was in the early eighties. Everyone was terrified of AIDS but not one person in our family wavered in support of my brother or his gay friends, many of whom their own families rejected. Religion should be instrument of love and healing, never a weapon.
Quincy's of the world, are the Real Bad Asses, be in God's army for sure, and its Peeps like him, that ensure Good always beats Evil, and always will!!
Religion is evil. How dare anyone ever tell this boy what they told him. There is no god, leave that b******t. Nobody says you have to stay.
Quincy put it right on the money.. Jesus has different things to worry about! So why then, do people think they need to be judge, jury and executioner? If Jesus isn’t worried, then no one should be!
Or empathy, intelligence, or compassion. Sad for you
Load More Replies...Because of the multiple stereotypes, such as: all gay adults were abused as children, that's why they're gay; Any positive experience from childhood must be their first sexual experience; and a young adult man mentoring a teen or preteen must have sexual motives, etc. etc.
Load More Replies...I'm not gay, but was the victim of an abusive mother at home and endless bullying at school and I was ready to pack it in when I was 15. Then a girl had moved into the area from Kansas. Unlike the other students, she liked me for me. She laughed at my jokes, let me hang out at her house, and picked me up at home so I didn't have to endure the abuses on the bus. Best part about it was, her father had some respect because he was boss to many of the other students parents. My bullies backed off and I was able to get through the majority of the rest of high school unscathed. I didn't tell her until 25 years later that she saved my life. She's my BFF and always will be. It just takes one person to save a life.
"It takes just one person to save a life" I like that statement, I like it a lot. Thank you for giving such a complex, yet simple phrase
Load More Replies...Wow, that is such a powerful story...And so incredibly heartbreaking that a 12-year-old would be ready to die because he is different.
Welcome to the world of being different in middle school
Load More Replies...This story is amazing. I know the feeling of being alone that fallows coming out. It's a hard time.
I am glad my (only) best friend accepted me when I came out as bisexual. I was scared of rejection, but she supports me so much. Even sometimes asks me about what I like about girls, what attracts me.... Firstly I was uncomfortable talking about this, cause I thought it would be disgusting and she would be weirded out, but said: "Look, you are my best friend. I love you with all my heart,. It's not disgusting for me, I myself talk with you about my sexual life, then why shouldn't I know what you like too. I know it's new for you being bi, but I won't judge you. And if someone has something u need to tell me." I am proud to have her in .my life. She makes it easier for me, to accept who I am
That is a true friend right there. Hold on to them tightly, because they are one in a million. :)
Load More Replies...what a blessing of a big brother. i hope those boys have had a wonderful, healthy, fulfilling life.
This story has renewed my faith in mankind I am so happy for you and I hope you live the best life
What a powerful and heartbreaking story. I am glad to know that there are powerful and caring allies like Quincy and Eunice our there. Nobody, and I repeat, nobody should every be bullied or abused for being different or not fitting someone’s definition of “normal.” I came out to my father and close family and it was one of the hardest things I did. I’m still not out to other family members or friends for fear of being treated differently, but I’m so glad for people who have the strength and courage to do so. I’m also glad for strong allies who love the LGTBQ+ community.
Come on, we have enough info to go on, lets find Quincy and Malcolm and thank them!
We'd all end up just sobbing and blubbering at poor Quincy and confusing tf outta him 😂
Load More Replies...that's an amazing, powerful story. i hope by sharing it others will speak up and become an ally for a kid they see struggling. i'm not a religious person, but if you claim you are, then you can't tell me that your God would agree with turning your back on one of his children.
Words cannot convey who happy I am that your suicide attempt wasn't successful. Blessings to you for coping and for thanking these two men.
I'll probably get some hate for this, but, hey, that's the world today. First off, I'm happy for the kid, really. I'm also happy to hear of the organization "Ditch the Label"... at last something that isn't taking over the world by shouting in your face. My absolute best friend in the world is gay...and I'm the only one that he's told. I tried to help him tell his mother, but it didn't work out so well. Anyways...I accept the guy 100%...I've got his back..what I DON'T accept is when he feels the need to graphically tell me of his experiences...I basically just need to shut him down...I don't want to hear it. Close friends always talk about who they're attracted to...I just can't 'identify' with what he''s telling me... (sexual conversations). I think that's the issue with a majority of heterosexual men...the gay "sexual" lifestyle is what is repugnant, and not the fact of "loving" someone the same sex. "Ditch" is a positive step for everyone
Interesting input. And while you apparently do get some hate, I personally don’t see anything wrong with your opinion. I don’t want to hear anyone‘s sex stories, regardless of their sexual orientation, and I think everyone has the right to speak up if someone forces a conversation upon them they’re uncomfortable with. As long as you don’t harrass or mistreat others because they‘re different, I‘m fine with whatever you personally think or feel about the topic of gay sex.
Load More Replies...heart breaking to hear people say such horrible things to a 12 year old boy. So grateful you met those two guys. Who knows, maybe god is real and sent them to you that day
Just be kind. That's all. You have no idea how much your smile the other day helped me. When I was feeling baaad and ugly.
to clarify; really bad... thinking suicide bad. post very bad evil parents , raping father. etc. ... "you" some stranger in the street. made me feel human again for long enough.
Load More Replies...God started April fools when he was like yo Abraham kill your son. Then just kidding! Just wanted to make sure you loved me jokes on you
Load More Replies...Feast of tabernacles was fun until returning home after missing two weeks of school in the beginning of the school year. Plus starts and ends on high holy days to be held like sabbath days. Also the forced amount of money my parents had to put away for the trip and werent suppose to bring any of it back on top of mandatory 20% tithe to the church. Fun times.
I just read a great single panel comic where a little kid asked the priest holding the bowl of contributions "How do you get this money up to Jesus?"
Load More Replies...That's why I come to this site. Stories like these. Stories that give you hope that maybe - just MAYBE - we are a species worth saving and that there are actually some decent, good people left in this world. Thank you!
Touching, beautiful and yes, they helped each other more than they could ever know! I hope someday they can meet again and rebond. What a beautiful story and remembrance.
good for you :) you've got an ally here as well. It's rare I hear anyone bisexual, much less a male, talk about their orientation. Takes real courage and real friends. I hope one day I'll have guts of steel like you.
In the sixth grade I was the lowest-status person in the whole school and I think it was because I had an enormous crush on another girl and couldn't hide it. Being 12 is so hard.
I've had a couple of friends come out to me a few were expected but a couple were a big surprise. But one friend when he approached me he asked if he could talk to me and I said sure. He said I wanted to tell you something but I'm not sure how to say it I stopped him and I said "I know you're gay" he looked at me in shock and was like How I've tried not to show it... and I said that's how I knew. He goes it doesn't bother you? I said no why should it you are still you.... He got the same reaction from a mutual friend and was surprised by our support which he relied on heavily when he came out to his father and brother who weren't supportive. Now over 20 years later his family has come around and he has been married to the love of his life for about a decade.
I ugly cried. My younger brother, who I adore, was in denial and kept himself closeted for so long. He joined the Coast Guard, got married, did everything he could do to shove his true self down. When he finally came out, he was so scared we, his family, would reject him. The opposite happened. I cried for joy that he was being his true self finally. My mother was "meh, you are my baby boy, love is love". That was in the early eighties. Everyone was terrified of AIDS but not one person in our family wavered in support of my brother or his gay friends, many of whom their own families rejected. Religion should be instrument of love and healing, never a weapon.
Quincy's of the world, are the Real Bad Asses, be in God's army for sure, and its Peeps like him, that ensure Good always beats Evil, and always will!!
Religion is evil. How dare anyone ever tell this boy what they told him. There is no god, leave that b******t. Nobody says you have to stay.
Quincy put it right on the money.. Jesus has different things to worry about! So why then, do people think they need to be judge, jury and executioner? If Jesus isn’t worried, then no one should be!
Or empathy, intelligence, or compassion. Sad for you
Load More Replies...Because of the multiple stereotypes, such as: all gay adults were abused as children, that's why they're gay; Any positive experience from childhood must be their first sexual experience; and a young adult man mentoring a teen or preteen must have sexual motives, etc. etc.
Load More Replies...
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