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We crave more than sunshine, warmth, and good company in the Fall. Everyone needs a good dose of humor to keep away the Autumn blues as well. And we’ve got a great collection that will make you chuckle all ready and waiting for you.

We’ve collected, concocted, and collated some of the very best examples of funny tweets posted by women. Grab a mug of hot cocoa or mulled wine, get comfortable on the couch, grab your cat or doggo for some company, and start scrolling. Upvote your fave tweets and share this list with anyone who desperately needs to unwind.

You can read Bored Panda’s previous posts about hilarious tweets by women that made everyone crack up right here, here, here, aaaaand here.

#2

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bjcolangelo Report

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Pamela24
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

OMG, where are you from? I had no idea this exact saying is international! :) (Czech person speaking...)

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deanna woods
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Why do parents tell these stupid lies instead of just saying " I don't want you to have green hair after Halloween."

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Id row
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

omg, that's hilarious. In about 10 years, she'll be posting about that time her dad lied to her about green hair being illegal after Halloween.

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The Original Bruno
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Various come-backs:1) "She's over 21. When you turn 21, I'll get you a scotch, some lottery tickets, and some green hair dye." or (keep in mind I like fun hair colors and am only saying a response, not making a judgment) 2) "Well look at her; she's obviously a criminal!"

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Sebastian Melmoth
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I dig green hair (favourite colour)...especially on Lum, from Urusei Yatsura

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Ally Kaye
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Hehehehe I'm probably the only one who got stranger things out of this, "FRIENDS DON'T LIE!"

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Tammy Ralph
Community Member
4 years ago

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Seabeast
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"Relax kid, you can have green hair for St. Patrick's day as well! Get your dad to buy you some green beer to drink as well."

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Mya Lugar
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Guess her "Kiss Me I'm Irish shirt is getting pretty rank by now!

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Bored Panda spoke with Sophia Armen, one of the women who posted extremely viral tweets. In her post, she compared EU leaders sitting around a round table to hummus and got nearly half a million likes.

“I love hummus and it is always on my mind. I couldn’t help it,” Armen explained what inspired her to make the joke. “The image even had the parsley garnish! People around the world expressed they also saw hummus. And once they saw it, that they “couldn’t unsee it.” That is how I felt as well.”

“The tweet got a lot of love from users in the Middle East. I was happy that a tweet spread a little joy,” she said. “As a woman social media can be a scary place, especially when you are outspoken and community-committed. This tweet was a moment of joy that showed universal love of hummus. Just made me smile and laugh.”

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The relationship between humor, stand-up comedy, and gender is seen as innately ‘sexist’ by some. Being a stand-up comedian was, until recently, seen as a profession ‘meant’ almost exclusively for men due to how much ‘aggression’ it requires. However, this has partly changed in recent years. Female comedians are becoming more and more prolific, even though not everyone accepts them. A large portion of female stand-up comedians use humor as a platform to declare their political beliefs and promote feminism.

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Humor is known to have positive side-effects. According to one study, laughter helps reduce blood pressure. While another one shows that laughing helps reduce anxiety, as well as other negative emotions. In other words, if you’re laughing, you most likely won’t be crying anytime soon. 

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What’s more, laughter can boost your immune system, improve blood circulation, calm down stress hormones, and even relieve pain! When you look at it this way, there’s barely anything that humor can’t help fix. Of course, it’s no substitute for exercise, a good diet, getting plenty of sleep, and doctor-approved medication or therapy if you need it, but laughter can give a big boost to your mood and your energy levels.

#10

Funny-Tweets-By-Women

LaLa_Lyds Report

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dani_q
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Well, did you start shaking and swinging your tail when you saw him walk in? :))) I bet the good boy did :))))))

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#16

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kttgros Report

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MagNat
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4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Someone explain to me why people who cheat are shocked when they're left. It's like, logical consequence.

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#17

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Vitt2tsnoc Report

#18

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Kristen_Arnett Report

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Rabbit Carrot
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Fared better than me. I accidentally kicked the couch and my toe bone split in two. I was on crutches for 6 weeks.

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#21

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march03rd Report

#22

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hailtotheHunny Report

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Kirsten Kerkhof
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I desperately want to claim that's a lie ... but it's true! I do have a favorite stovetop burner! I'm too much of an adult ...

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#27

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theresemerkel Report

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Aleksandra Kozłowska
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Because you my darling are shining diamond of nonsense and something better is waiting for you

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#30

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gothshakira Report

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Isabella
Community Member
4 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Well... nope. It's about a person's traits not what sex they are. My husband carries a BACKPACK - daily. With multitool, a bottle of water, hand sanitizer, water filter, rain jacket, a knife, and some energy bars... so am I. So either we are both preppers for zombie apocalypse... or just very smart people.

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#34

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katelizabee Report

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Id row
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4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Still better than the people who CAPITALIZE every OTHER word for DRAMATIC effect. Also better than those who use the word 'literally' too much and incorrectly. "I literally went to the store." My head threatens to explode when people do that. Literally.

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#36

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chrissyteigen Report

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Hans
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

No, it means you should have taken biology classes more seriously.

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#38

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Autumn_Kamrie Report

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Hello it Smee
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That happen to my brother this past summer. His daughter said look daddy they fit me now.

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#39

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ka_waltz Report

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Shelby P
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4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Math should stop acting like a child and solve its own problems (not my quote but so true)

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#42

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saaamscottt6 Report

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Lenka Smetanová
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4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

loool, I laugh so hrd that my cat sleeping next to me woke up, growl at me and leave :D

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#45

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mayainthemoment Report

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#49

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ashleymayer Report

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Katherine Boag
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I mean switching your letters around isn't dangerous until you try to pronounce it and accidentally summon a demon...

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#50

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kendraaaleighh Report

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Mariana Schneider
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm the opposite. I don't work out, sit at a desk all day, and I'd still happily sleep 10+ hours a night 7 days a week.

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#52

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Kristen_Arnett Report

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Kim Bush
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If that's the greatest lie the devil ever told you then you all lead charmed lives

#54

Funny-Tweets-By-Women

leafyIeah Report

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Hello it Smee
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Maybe if the service industry wasn't rigged against the wait staff. When most of their wages come from tips.

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#55

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SidwWolfe Report

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Mary Jo
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's not like she purposefully wrecked her car because she was in that costume.

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#58

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VisionBored1 Report

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Niffler_13
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I splurged on a carpet cleaner with a quick wash function, lol

#64

Funny-Tweets-By-Women

czericeliza Report

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Shawn
Community Member
4 years ago

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Yeah but have you ever had a text changed? I've sent something to whom is now an ex but the message she recieved from me was changed from what I had typed. So it then totally changed how this text would be read and interpreted.

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#65

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drjclau Report

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Lilli
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

UPVOTE FOR YOU UPVOTE FOR YOU AND AN UPVOE FOR YOU.... why can't I upvote this more??

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#66

Funny-Tweets-By-Women

malban_ Report

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#70

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svershbow Report

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kkathleen517
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What is SMH? I keep coming across these in posts what the hell? It's like another language, man I'm not going to sit around for five mins trying to figure out what words start with smh just type that s**t out. Some Monkey Hype? Is that it? Someone Moo's Hello? Smoke Marijuana Hookahs? Yep, that must be the one. ( I totally sat around for five mins trying to figure it out) damn it!

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#71

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#74

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Steph_I_Will Report

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#75

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chrissyteigen Report

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#76

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tweetrajouhari Report

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张艺兴
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Me at 4 years old telling my mom I can do a backflip when in reality I'm just twirling backwards

#80

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chrissyteigen Report

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#81

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Kristen_Arnett Report

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#83

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#86

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MenkauraB Report

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#91

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adriel_willis Report

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Aldhissla VargTimmen
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This may seem like a bad bf but if my husband, who can not always say in words what he wants to say, went to google search for something that describes his feelings it wouldn't mean less to me. I think this is sweet :)

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#94

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katesquire Report

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Lorraine R
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Actually this is brilliant -- finding out what's really in this stuff that you put on your skin all the time.

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#95

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BoomBoomBetty Report

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#96

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nextleveltilly Report

#98

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#100

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#101

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ibeshitposting Report

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Demi Zwaan
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Well, you do have a hunter, a trapper and a fisher, so you're all set for Robinson's island.

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#102

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petridishes Report

#103

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GroovyTasia Report

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Anne
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Its probably not the coffee.. its more likely to be all the sugar in that o_0

#105

Funny-Tweets-By-Women

JessicaValenti Report

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#106

Funny-Tweets-By-Women

Maisie_Williams Report

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Demi Zwaan
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Maybe not wear a dress with a personal space device attached to it, so other people can be in the picture and not stand on it?

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#108

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Nicole_Cliffe Report

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Kiss Army
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have 6 cats. They always NEED to be on the other side of any closed door. No closed doors at my house either...

#109

Funny-Tweets-By-Women

lilireinhart Report

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#114

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KaufmanAudrey Report

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#115

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holy_schnitt Report

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#116

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hawillisdc Report

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Lily
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Studio C and JK! Studios. No slurs, and funny. Also pretty professional.

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#117

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KarenKilgariff Report

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#118

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tiffygvgs Report

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Niffler_13
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I once got a message like that at 3am from a guy I hadn't talked to in almost 3 years.

#120

Funny-Tweets-By-Women

marthonite Report

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#123

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redactedgirl Report

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#124

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Brittany_broski Report

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#125

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nataliecanales Report

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#126

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#127

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Coll3enG Report

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Emerald Joanna
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have NEVER heard a guy say "do you want to do your skincare routine in my bathroom?" If i am staying at a boys place you best believe half my make up wil end up smeared on the pillowcase and I will wake up looking like death...

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