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If there’s something in this world that we still have the power to control, it must be reviews. These short sentences of practical wisdom shared with fellow customers, shoppers, or diners can totally make it or break it for brands, services, and products.

Think of the last time you went on Amazon to get your mom a fancy aroma diffuser. If you are a stranger in the land of aroma diffusers, and most of us are, you totally rely on that one or two scribbles of feedback left by someone who probably doesn’t remember ever writing it.

And while some reviews are indeed helpful and others plain odd, others are splendidly hilarious. Like, verging on the border of being their own kind of comedic gold.

But thanks to the subreddit r/amazonreviews, which has been collecting the “the funniest damned product reviews on Amazon” since 2012, we've got quite an archive to feast on. From weirdly specific to plain specific, from painfully funny to mildly funny, there’s everything for every single taste in the reviews department. Psst! Part 1 of the same 5-star hilarity waits here.

#1

Hilarious!

Hilarious!

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Sum Guy
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

First time I ever read this review, I laughed way too much and it was the same time I saw the video of air mattresses causing havoc in the surburbs

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#2

A Cute Amazon Review I Revisit Just For A Smile. An 88 Year Old Woman And Her 92 Year Old Husband Attend A Halloween Party. Btw They Liked The Bee Costume

A Cute Amazon Review I Revisit Just For A Smile. An 88 Year Old Woman And Her 92 Year Old Husband Attend A Halloween Party. Btw They Liked The Bee Costume

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#3

Turning A Bad Situation Into A Good Review?

Turning A Bad Situation Into A Good Review?

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To find out more about the community dedicated entirely to the funniest, most genuine, and utterly absurd Amazon reviews, Bored Panda reached out to the moderator u/Pzreich of the subreddit r/AmazonReviews.

Even though the subreddit was created 8 years ago, it didn’t really get a lot of people coming until 2015. Today, the community gets about 90 to 150 posts a month, but the daily amount of submissions varies quite a bit, the mod explained.

When asked about what u/Pzreich defines as a good Amazon review, he said that it’s one which “shares the delightful oddities people possess and share. I personally prefer those where you can really see the person’s thoughts and personality and stories shine through.” This review would be an example of it.

#4

Just Saw This Today On A Teeth Whitening System

Just Saw This Today On A Teeth Whitening System

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MiraiJack
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

So white that they enslaved my soul, which is dark.

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Brent Kaufman
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Maybe it was never meant to be free in the first place. Some souls are subjugated by their nature.

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Suzanne Haigh
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I did find this very funny. But if this was about black people though it would be horribly racist, so why is it not?

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Gyro Pilot
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Because "this falafel was so Islamic that it made me feel like conquering and colonizing Spain" doesn't have the same ring. Please stop with these racist attempts at humour.

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Ozacoter
Community Member
3 years ago

This comment has been deleted.

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Cecily Holland
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

And as always there are idiots in the comment squealing DAT BEEZ RAYCIST. Grow a sense of humour Virtue Signallers

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Antonio Gregovich
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This deserves way more upvotes. It has the perfect amount of dark humor, and simplicity

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William Brooks
Community Member
3 years ago

This comment has been deleted.

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Elaine Mattingly
Community Member
3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

We don't need to be reminded, ashhamed yes but not reminded of evil times and people who supposedly discovered land and thought they had the right to steal it and brag about how they were so awsome for having done it. Then enslave other human beings to work the land they stole and think they could justify it. When your time is done you will be held accountable as long as you pretend ,"Oh well, other people did it too." Yes Lord they did it too." I didn't and I would not and I am ashamed of those who did. And the laughter stops. "Please forgive us."

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Felix Feline
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Imagine the screams of outrage if someone reviewed, say, a black t-shirt: "It's so black I was afraid that it would mug me". Apparently it's okay to be racist as long as the target is white. What great lessons we teach our children.

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#6

Ok, I’m Sold!

Ok, I’m Sold!

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Meanwhile, a bad review is “generally anything repetitive,” the moderator explained and added that “we’ve had to close quite a few posts that were Amazon users answering questions in a way that didn’t make sense. Turns out, “it was found that they received these in their email and it wasn’t them intentionally answering the question.”

"This can still lead to funny occurrences, but generally it’s not the most interesting to look at, no shame at all to our wonderful members who share them," said u/Pzreich and gave this review as an example.

On the other hand, a fan-favorite funny review is usually one that “doesn’t have to be super long, but it usually falls into the same standards as the good ones,” u/Pzreich said. According to him, simplicity and comedic appeal combined make a perfect Amazon review that entertains people. And this particular one may have it all, according to the moderator.

“I enjoy moderating this subreddit because Amazon reviews are really the gift that keeps on giving since it really is a great medium for capturing a neat essence of human nature,” u/Pzreich concluded.

#7

Found Last Night When Shopping For A LED Collar For Dog

Found Last Night When Shopping For A LED Collar For Dog

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#9

50 Lb Pound Of Play Sand Is Heavy And Makes For Great Revenge!

50 Lb Pound Of Play Sand Is Heavy And Makes For Great Revenge!

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#12

At Least It’s Keto Friendly...

At Least It’s Keto Friendly...

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#13

Man Has Existential Crisis Over Gaffers Tape

Man Has Existential Crisis Over Gaffers Tape

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Bill
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm building a solar field in New England and have to store tape inside my snow suit all day. Cold tape doesn't stick

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#15

Graphing Calculator

Graphing Calculator

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#16

On A Review For Down Pillows... Thanks For The Clarification

On A Review For Down Pillows... Thanks For The Clarification

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#17

I Was Searching For Transparent Sewing Thread

I Was Searching For Transparent Sewing Thread

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#18

Can You Replace The Spray

Can You Replace The Spray

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#19

No King Lives Forever

No King Lives Forever

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#21

It’s A Trap!

It’s A Trap!

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#24

Rip Bob, The Little Roomba That Couldn't

Rip Bob, The Little Roomba That Couldn't

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#25

Worked As Advertised

Worked As Advertised

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Katy McMouse
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I just bought these for my sons. It's handy to know that they won't hear the agonized screeching of my husband as I eviscerate him for, well, just about everything the poor bastard has done since quarantine began. I, unfortunately, have a long memory and a much shorter fuse these days.

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#27

“It’s Lube, Not Much More To Say”

“It’s Lube, Not Much More To Say”

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#28

As Soon As I Started Looking For Googly Eyes, I Knew The Reviews Would End Up Here

As Soon As I Started Looking For Googly Eyes, I Knew The Reviews Would End Up Here

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#29

I Love When Reviewers Post Photos

I Love When Reviewers Post Photos

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#30

Review For A Sprinkler

Review For A Sprinkler

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#31

Found This Gem While Buying Ant Poison

Found This Gem While Buying Ant Poison

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Brandy Grote
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What is this product? We used Terro baits all summer, but I still had to spray the monsters.

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#35

Herb Garden Is Seriously Nice Stuff

Herb Garden Is Seriously Nice Stuff

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Maiun
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Been grumpy since I've known myself - fantastic turn of phrase!

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#37

"I Should Have Picked A Different Color"

"I Should Have Picked A Different Color"

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#40

Much More Comfortable With My Purchase Now

Much More Comfortable With My Purchase Now

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#41

So Like, Where Are The Wolves?

So Like, Where Are The Wolves?

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Ivo H
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

These kind of comments sure are funny, but they should NEVER be an excuse to give the product one-star rating. You can write anything you want, but the star rating should always reflect your REAL experience.

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#42

He Ordered A Terabyte Ssd... And Got Wood

He Ordered A Terabyte Ssd... And Got Wood

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#43

In The Reviews For A Weighted Blanket

In The Reviews For A Weighted Blanket

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#44

A Fair Question

A Fair Question

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Brandy Grote
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That cancer warning law backfired. Everything now causes cancer, and no one cares or pays attention to the warning. Making it ineffectual, therefore the companies are still liable if they use cancer causing stuff. Lookin at you, Monsanto.

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#45

Woman Hides Laptop In Oven, Rates 5 Stars For Surving The Heat!

Woman Hides Laptop In Oven, Rates 5 Stars For Surving The Heat!

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Mohsie Supposie
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think there IS something wrong with the laptop. It repeated the first 4 lines of the review!

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#46

Perhaps Rethink Shipping?

Perhaps Rethink Shipping?

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#50

Ordered Hair Clips And Found This

Ordered Hair Clips And Found This

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Note: this post originally had 89 images. It’s been shortened to the top 50 images based on user votes.