There are a ton of reasons why we love the United Kingdom—from its gorgeous nature and culture to its wide-ranging cuisine and renowned literature. But something that keeps us coming back is our love for the British press with all of its ups, downs, and unique quirks. There’s honestly hardly anything better than making a big cup of tea and opening up the serious Sunday papers or going for a cheeky scroll through the digital tabloids. It’s entertaining. It’s fun. It’s off the hook!
Now that’s where the ‘Mental UK Headlines’ Twitter page comes in. A social media project that unites nearly 100k followers, the account features some of the funniest, most bizarre, and downright ludicrous news stories and headlines found in the British press. Both in the tabloids and in the more serious (digital) papers. And today we’re featuring some of their very best finds to bring a smile to your face. Just because the press isn't yellow doesn't mean it's not immune to some truly bizarre headlines.
Go on, grab yourself some biscuits and enjoy a good laugh. Don’t forget to upvote the pics that you enjoyed the most, send a few your friends’ way, and if you really love what you’re seeing, give ‘Mental UK Headlines’ a follow for some more top-tier humor.
Bored Panda got in touch with author, comedy writer, journalist, and all-around talented creative Ariane Sherine from the UK. We had a chat about tabloids, catchy headlines, and why the Brits love the sensationalist press so much. Read on for our full interview with her!
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Journalist and comedy expert Ariane, from London, shared her thoughts about the tabloids (or the ‘red tops’ as the Brits call them) with Bored Panda.
“I think the British press, particularly the sensationalist yellow press uses a lot more wordplay, humor, and puns in headlines—and also employs shock to grab the reader,” Ariane told us.
“You’ve also got our tabloid the Daily Sport, which I wouldn’t even class as a newspaper as it’s mostly made up for entertainment and titillation!”
We were curious to get Ariane’s take on why the British enjoy tabloids so much, whether it’s all for the sake of being entertained or if they actually believe the biased news printed there.
“I definitely think people read the Sport purely for cheeky entertainment and to look at scantily clad women, as it’s only meant for that,” the journalism expert told us.
“But a lot of people get all their news from the Sun or Star, which is a bit worrying. They definitely believe everything they read in those papers—and they shouldn’t!” she warned.
Meanwhile, when it comes to writing striking headlines, Ariane said that a lot depends on the topic in question. If you care about the issues on a personal level, you’re already more likely to read the story.
She shared some of the things that journalists ought to look at when writing headlines: “What’s the human interest angle? What would grab my attention? You have to distill the story into its essence in one sentence. What makes it entertaining?”
The ‘Mental UK Headlines’ project is fairly fresh. The account was started up on Twitter almost exactly a year ago, in April 2021. In that time, they’ve gotten the love and attention of 98.2k followers.
The account shows us a few things. First of all, how much a good headline can boost our mood for the next few hours (who doesn’t love a hearty chuckle?). Secondly, there are some truly weird events going on in the world. And lastly, the British yellow press is willing to write about pretty much anything and everything for the sake of a ‘story.’ Whether that restores or destroys your faith in humanity depends on your perspective.
During a previous interview, London-based comedy writer Ariane told Bored Panda that humor plays a huge role in British culture.
“I think it is inherently witty and quirky but coupled with a huge dose of irony and self-consciousness,” she shared her thoughts about British wit with us.
“[British humor is] sarcastic, petty, ridiculous, embarrassed, self-conscious, and underpinned with the knowledge and awareness of how silly Brits are,” the comedy expert explained to Bored Panda how we can define this unique sense of humor.
“When people think of us, they think of the Royal Family, iconic images like London buses and phone boxes, afternoon tea, period dramas, and posh people—like Hugh Grant in Richard Curtis films!” Ariane said how the world tends to think of the British.
Som many people are left "crying and shaking", traumatized, or "devastated" these days.
Have you faced down an Aldi cashier? The pressure is real.
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i love the photo they used for this headline. *product scanning intensifies*
That's regular speed at German check out not just in Aldi. Always pray there's someone before you or you're in deep s**t cause they start cashing while you're still putting your goods on, than the goods tower beside the cashier and you have to hurry even more getting it back in your shopping cart. @_@ been there, hurried up! XD
In Holland you have room to after paying put the stuff in bags and the next one's groceries come next to it, but at Aldi there is some tiny space where they put it and hurry up, throw it in your bag or chart. If they don't work quick, ppl in the row will start to complain, because they have to wait. Now that I do it myself, I'm like: How on earth can they do it that fast?
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Aldi has speed standards upon which its cashiers must perform on though 🤨🤨🙄 and i think the idea is because it’s a low cost supermarket, they train their cashiers to be lighting bolts because the queues are long, they don’t have self service, plus Aldi is a German brand probably trying to establish efficiency as one of its marketing selling points
Have you been through an Aldi cashier?? You have to do your own bagging and the pressure to keep up with the cashier as they run your stuff through the scanner is immense!
That's one reason I don't shop there. We just don't rush like that in this country, and it's annoying as hell. That being said, most people just put the stuff back in the cart and bag it after they're finished checking out.
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Aldi and Lidl are the same very fast. That is why they have a bagging area after the tiles so you can put your things away properly. So trolley - till- trolley - bagging up area - car.
Not in Holland at the Aldi. Hurry up and throw it in your bag or chart. We don't have all day.
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This is nonsense, yes the cashiers are super fast, but they are also very kind and helpful, I've seen them deal with my elderly mother, and I have absolutely nothing to complain about
It's the social pressure. You feel like you have to keep up to not piss anyone else off. And you've somehow failed if you don't.
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'Tis intimidating. Those cashiers are lightning fast. I throw everything into the basket as fast as I can after check out, then run to the bench to bag it as fast as I can. At that point I guess I don't have to hurry but I feel I must at least try to live up to their expectations.
I have always been amazed by my local Aldi... always costs a lot less than I expected, and scanned like lightening. Where I live, people turn out in droves for Aldi job fairs, because they pay better than most similar employers.
I'm in the Phoenix Arizona area and Aldi is fairly new to the valley. Their corporate ninja skills must have transferred across the pond. It is quite an experience to shop there!
Yes! We just went to the one that just opened in the north valley today lol hi fellow phoenician
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Let's be real. This woman clearly had some real problems, and it sounds like the Aldi cashier was just the straw that broke the camel's back. I wish therapy was less stigmatized and more accessible.
Compensation culture is relatively young here in the UK. An awful lot of people have been "crying and shaking" in recent years.
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The manager issued her a ticket for wreckless speeding during work hours.
Read the mum's account, and I fear I would've bopped him on the head with the tin that fell on the floor due to his speed.
Somebody needs to get a life. It doesn't mean that you have to pack your bags to keep up with the cashier!
She was then insulted when she found she had to bag her own groceries.
I'm upvoting this one because this is why we Brits, as a society, have anxiety.
They are fast but you are the one who regulates when the process finishes. Just load your bags normally and let the food pile. It's great fun when they've finished and get agitated whilst you calmly load your bags.
You're supposed to f**k everything back in the trolley and pack it on the big bench at the end. Some like a challenge though.
I remember this kind of thing when I had a broken shoulder! I wasn't exactly traumatized but it was hilarious watching the cashier's face as she expected me to bag my stuff like a non injured person. Like I know they have targets to meet but I can't magic my shoulder better no matter who wants it so sorry Aldi!!
Crying about what? You unload your items one at a time instead of just dumping them out on that conveyer belt. And she was cool. You're the one who thought 30 cans of chili counted as one item and you still couldn't keep up with her.
I understand where she's coming from. I pack my items carefully but refuse to use the Aldi system as I only use a basket. I unpack scientifically with heavy items out first and softest ones last . One stormtrooper aka cashier was going so fast I asked her to slow down. She told me I was packing incorrectly. I really slowed down then. I'm served, not processed.
Aldi cashiers in America are crazy fast too compared to other stores. No on is Suing.
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She'd be a lot more recognizable if both eyes were on the same side of her nose.
“They see us as charming and antiquated and think we're adorable. Spoiler: we're not really like this! Which they'll find out if they ever visit Britain, but I guess most people never do, so we remain cute and posh in their imaginations,” the comedy writer quipped.
Meanwhile, Lisa McLendon, the William Allen White Professor of Journalism and Mass Communications and the coordinator of the Bremner Editing Center at the University of Kansas, was kind enough to share her insights about text and how to leave an immediate impact on the audience with us during an earlier interview.
The professor said that when you have to make an immediate impression on someone, like with a sign, it’s best to focus on clarity and brevity. That’s especially important in our world where there’s a seemingly endless stream of information and shortening attention spans.
"Clarity and brevity are essential. You only have a second or two to get your message across, so you want people to understand quickly with zero confusion," she told Bored Panda.
What’s more, journalism and editing expert Lisa stressed the necessity to proofread all of your work. And then getting someone else to proofread it again. It’s especially useful when you’re using text in ways that can’t be easily and cheaply edited later (like it would be online).
Yeah, we all make mistakes - sure, but you need to take responsibility for your actions. Saying "everyone does it" isn't really taking responsibility.
-"What is the purpose of your visit?" - "Well actually I'm a terrorist and I will be performing terrorist acts throughout the country" - "OK sir, enjoy your stay"
She also stressed that it’s important to choose the right font, with the audience in mind. It should be clear. It should be readable. It shouldn’t have your readers second-guessing what they’re looking at.
I saw this apparently it was found safely outside in a hedge. Apparently the staff were very worried about it as nature abhors a vacuum. 😂
It should be mentioned that this little girl has Autism and struggles a lot with selective eating, which in some cases can be so severe that they would rather starve than eat something that isn't familiar or suitable for their selective tastes/texture etc.
Note: this post originally had 70 images. It’s been shortened to the top 50 images based on user votes.
You know if the Darwin awards were a real thing some of these people would have won too many times to be allowed to compete again.
Many of these could jut have easily been in Florida. The most bat shiit nuts state in the Union.
Texas keeps trying its hardest, but just can't knock The Sunshine State out of 1st place.
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https://metro.co.uk/2022/02/10/man-reunited-with-false-teeth-after-vomiting-them-into-bin-decade-ago-16083867/ How, oh how, did they miss this one?
I'm just snickering my ass off at these comments. Thanks BP community. You have made my day!
Florida man might have a case for trademark infringement. He is, after all, known for these exact type of antics. But I personally like to see the crazy spread around.
Why do you have a bored panda account if you don't like it tho? Lol
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There are dozens of those on this site already, no need to imagine.
Load More Replies... You know if the Darwin awards were a real thing some of these people would have won too many times to be allowed to compete again.
Many of these could jut have easily been in Florida. The most bat shiit nuts state in the Union.
Texas keeps trying its hardest, but just can't knock The Sunshine State out of 1st place.
Load More Replies... https://metro.co.uk/2022/02/10/man-reunited-with-false-teeth-after-vomiting-them-into-bin-decade-ago-16083867/ How, oh how, did they miss this one?
I'm just snickering my ass off at these comments. Thanks BP community. You have made my day!
Florida man might have a case for trademark infringement. He is, after all, known for these exact type of antics. But I personally like to see the crazy spread around.
Why do you have a bored panda account if you don't like it tho? Lol
Load More Replies... There are dozens of those on this site already, no need to imagine.
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