Marriage is full of ups and downs, highs and lows, and as with anything in life - the struggles of it can be taken with a dash of humor. The arguments themselves can be funny, especially when they arise over something trivial, like leaving a kitchen cabinet open. Bored Panda has compiled a list of hilarious tweets for you that reveal the harsh-but-funny truths of marriage and the raw nature of it. Scroll down below to read all 60 of them and leave a vote for those that you like.

#1

JessObsess Report

Night Owl
Community Member
2 years ago

Priorities

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#2

SladeWentworth Report

Victoria Rey Piuma
Community Member
2 years ago

Perfect

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#3

Peauxtassium Report

Night Owl
Community Member
2 years ago

He needs to scream louder

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#4

daddydoubts Report

Eagle Girl
Community Member
2 years ago

..but you don't need a raincoat

Elsker
Community Member
2 years ago

that still depends on the circumstances..

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JV
Community Member
2 years ago

No, this is sex after kids. Being married is irrelevant.

Mark Howell
Community Member
2 years ago

Wait till the children arrive. Planning needs a calendar, even then with allowances for unexpected rain-checks ;o)

Diana Rodz
Community Member
2 years ago

If you have kids. Not an issue if you don't.

Mark Kelly
Community Member
2 years ago

Sometimes during if you're into it.

Lisa Stewart
Community Member
2 years ago

Are we there yet??

Grace Wiebe
Community Member
2 years ago

My friend's husband cleverly approached her one evening with 2 Aspirin in hand. He gives her the Aspirin & she asks, "What's this for?" He matter-of-factly answers; "For your headache." She crumples her brow & says, "I don't have a headache." He grins; "Gotcha!" So yeah...she got pregnant that night. ;)

Beth McFadden
Community Member
2 years ago

Precisely.

Azrul Ahmad
Community Member
2 years ago

Lol so true

Richard Robertson
Community Member
2 years ago

Absolutely! We both travel a lot and joke we have million dollar sex: it only happens when we both stay in the same hotel together!

Magpie
Community Member
2 years ago

So true.

Mary Montejo
Community Member
2 years ago

You ready? I'm ready. You sure, yeah sure.

Mewton’s Third Paw
Community Member
2 years ago

Sounds more like parents, not married people.

Rocky Joe
Community Member
2 years ago

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And some duct tapes always useful

Sue Clifford
Community Member
2 years ago

I would use the duct tape to cover M O’Connell, the wood guy’s mouth.

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Zerina Bermudez
Community Member
2 years ago

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women are supposed to pee AFTER sex to help prevent UTIs...

Elfmonkey
Community Member
2 years ago

Unless you just need to pee... Makes focusing on sex a bit difficult otherwise.

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#5

iwearaonesie Report

ember avery
Community Member
2 years ago

its like when you lose something and check everywhere, and your mom tells you to look somewhere you've already looked but you check there anyway and find it there

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#6

simoncholland Report

M O'Connell
Community Member
2 years ago

My partner does this all the time. I'm colorblind! How the hell am I supposed to know these two pieces of clothing "go together" ? One covers my legs, one covers my shoulder legs, they "go together".

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#7

squirrel74wkgn Report

Eagle Girl
Community Member
2 years ago

Before marriage you probably didn't know to put the seat down but now, bc someone loves you, you do :)

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#8

Lisabug74 Report

glowworm2
Community Member
2 years ago

I'd forgive him just for using such an adorable play on words!

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#9

houseandhens Report

MadMom
Community Member
2 years ago

YES! Alphabetizing the CDs is not what I had in mind.

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#10

cameronesposito Report

Elizabeth
Community Member
2 years ago

my husband is usually the one moving my glasses, he sees them and thinks they are in a bad spot. When I wake up I need help, because of him!

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#11

DadZZZasleep Report

Eagle Girl
Community Member
2 years ago

*sigh*clops! Awesome screen name!!

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#12

simoncholland Report

StinkyMonkey
Community Member
2 years ago

We've changed a few things in the living room last week and we still haven't stopped congratulating ourselves on it.

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#13

iwearaonesie Report

Benjamin Boysley
Community Member
2 years ago (edited)

It's so he could Cheeto death :P

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#14

sarcasticmommy4 Report

RacconLifeGirlie
Community Member
2 years ago

Without fail, my father will fall asleep to ANY movie that we watch.

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#15

HenpeckedHal Report

Victoria Rey Piuma
Community Member
2 years ago

😂😂😂😂 perfect!

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#16

Lhlodder Report

Rebekah
Community Member
2 years ago

... and they know...

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#17

supermarkusa Report

Mark Howell
Community Member
2 years ago

Quickie... Quiche . you could have both

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#18

MelvinofYork Report

M O'Connell
Community Member
2 years ago

lol

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#19

mommajessiec Report

Night Owl
Community Member
2 years ago

The key word being finally

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#20

mommajessiec Report

Victoria Rey Piuma
Community Member
2 years ago

Men! *smh*

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#21

Cheeseboy22 Report

Night Owl
Community Member
2 years ago

Hey, at least he listened without interrupting

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#22

smerobin Report

Ben Smith
Community Member
2 years ago

You are well within your rights to divorce him. He knew what he was doing. He has to pay the price

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#23

ThatMummyLife Report

Ana Fuentes
Community Member
2 years ago

yeah, my hubby was looking for a bowl, he spend about a minute looking. me: what are you looking for? hubby: a bowl me: they are right here, where they have always been. hubby: well they where not their 8 years ago me: no, but they were there 7 1/2 years ago.

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#24

ADHDeanASL Report

Jill
Community Member
2 years ago

My husband just had his 52nd birthday. So i congratulated him on being able to tolerate me for so many years.

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#25

Parkerlawyer Report

Blue Cicada
Community Member
2 years ago

That shows the great depth of love for you and compassion for the waiter.

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#26

simoncholland Report

Eagle Girl
Community Member
2 years ago

Well. since garage shelves were a "game changer" guess you won't be needing the counter space for sex so, Yeah~ Go Hog Wild!

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#27

squirrel74wkgn Report

M O'Connell
Community Member
2 years ago

There is an ancient Chinese proverb: If a vegan does CrossFit, which do they tell you about first?

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#28

murrman5 Report

Erin
Community Member
2 years ago

Don't do it, I hate being left handed. Everything is built for righties :(

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#29

StoneAgeRadio13 Report

Ana Fuentes
Community Member
2 years ago

all the seasons of Downton Abby, 3 seasons of Victoria, 3 seasons of the Crown, 3 seasons of Versalles, and 8 seasons of Game of Thrones.

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#30

simoncholland Report

Xoxo
Community Member
2 years ago

And color swatches and paint chips

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