So you've committed a crime and you've just been caught. Now what?

Well, apart from taking some precious time out to reflect upon your dumbass life choices, you're going to need some legal advice. Better call Saul! But if he's busy then we'd recommend checking out L. Scott Briscoe. He's a lawyer from West Virginia, and he's picked up a bunch of useful tips during his nineteen years of legal practice. He shares them on his Facebook page and they cover everything from what not to wear in a courtroom to how not to cheat a drug test. We can't guarantee they'll help you beat the rap, but at least they'll give you something to laugh about. In prison.

More info: Facebook (h/t: collegehumor)

#1

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Anna Brandigi
Community Member
5 years ago

If your social security number was your age, how old would you be?😱

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#2

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Kjorn
Community Member
5 years ago

if you do drug the chances are good that your friend do it too.

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#3

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Amanda Panda
Community Member
5 years ago

"He said we were going to get McDonalds, I didn't know he meant rob it" - Friend

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#4

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Hans
Community Member
5 years ago

I guess many of these tipps can be subsumed as "do not be so bloody stupid"...

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#5

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Susanna Vesna
Community Member
5 years ago

Legalize it! And make cigarettes illegal!!!

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#6

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Hans
Community Member
5 years ago

sounds legit

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#7

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Kjorn
Community Member
5 years ago

it doesn't work? damn... i must find another excuse then :-)

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#8

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Hans
Community Member
5 years ago

Irony or stupidity? You decide.

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#9

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Hans
Community Member
5 years ago

This hand-raising thing is awkward...a relict of the past. As if it would make people lie less...

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#10

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Maureen Eggert
Community Member
5 years ago

Sounds like person was doing quite a decent job of exposure.

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#11

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Yvonne Bernal
Community Member
5 years ago

Reminds me of the slogan from years ago.... "Only dopes do dope"

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#12

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Kjorn
Community Member
5 years ago

LOL at least it's not for something frivolous

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#13

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Luke S.
Community Member
4 years ago

should have done a little more research on this one

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#14

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Yvonne Bernal
Community Member
5 years ago

Telling the judge you can't find your witness because they're in the 'witness protection' program probably won't work either.

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#15

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Catalina Ioan
Community Member
5 years ago

Oh, wow... Karma was having a blast that day

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#16

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Hans
Community Member
5 years ago

Helping the state safe money!

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#17

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Susanna Vesna
Community Member
5 years ago

Drug Dealers still have no Customer Service set up?! Unacceptable!

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#18

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Amanda Panda
Community Member
5 years ago

... and you are bound to hear in prison -_-

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#19

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Yvonne Bernal
Community Member
5 years ago

Asking her for sex probably isn't a good idea either.... with or without the pills.

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#20

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Kjorn
Community Member
5 years ago

x-ray line on a cruise ship? what kind of cruise is that?

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#21

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Catalina Ioan
Community Member
5 years ago

"I'm an Eskimo" might work in a plea for insanity, though

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#22

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Kika Virtanen
Community Member
5 years ago

Ohhh kayyy..........wat?

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#23

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Hans
Community Member
5 years ago

haha, that sounds at least interesting to watch.

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#24

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Deb Bie
Community Member
5 years ago

Why would you friend a judge on Facebook?!?!

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#25

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Catalina Ioan
Community Member
5 years ago

Maybe "People of Walmart" should relocate :))

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#26

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David Stuckey
Community Member
5 years ago

Or on Facebook the week of the trial either - http://loweringthebar.net/2016/04/i-got-you-cold-mate.html

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#27

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Kjorn
Community Member
5 years ago

people who do drug are so dumb. like my kid who has chocolate on his face and insist of telling me he doesn't know who eat the chocolat chip cookies

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#28

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Jace
Community Member
5 years ago

With those kinds of tattoos on a person, it's pretty much too late to give them tips on being reasonable and socially harmonious.

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#29

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Enoch Evenson
Community Member
5 years ago

If you only know one sign.

Wacky Panda
Community Member
5 years ago

But probably just me being stupid

Wacky Panda
Community Member
5 years ago

I don't get it

Ainsley Allred
Community Member
5 years ago

I think it has something to do with some inappropriate finger gestures.

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#30

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Kjorn
Community Member
5 years ago

dear lord

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#31

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Hans
Community Member
5 years ago

Strange question, though...

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#32

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Catalina Ioan
Community Member
5 years ago

I'm betting the court found his funnier, though

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#33

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Arty
Community Member
5 years ago

smartphones and internet have really made police work more easy! :p

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#34

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Arty
Community Member
5 years ago

and what about some moat around the trailer?

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#35

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Catalina Ioan
Community Member
5 years ago

Alas, his undaunted accuracy was lost on the courtroom that day...

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#36

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Kjorn
Community Member
5 years ago

an injection made me pregnant would've been more plausible

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#37

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Jamie Lua
Community Member
5 years ago

😂😂😂😂

#39

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Julia Wolfe
Community Member
5 years ago

"Snuggly" 😂😂😂

#40

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Kjorn
Community Member
5 years ago

yeah! like people who complaint about their bosses or jobs on facebook

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#41

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Maggie Macaskill
Community Member
5 years ago

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Yo I heard the shit gets in so you might just be wrong. We need more constructive advice. Can you ask your clients who never got the "tobacco" discovered on their person for a better tip?

#42

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Kjorn
Community Member
5 years ago

that's disgusting. It's fun to do, but we don't need to know the detail

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#43

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Kjorn
Community Member
5 years ago

that's a good thing. that dumbass will stay in jail instead of doing his crappy stuff outside

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#44

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Master Markus
Community Member
5 years ago

"Fuck you?"

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#45

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JEFF THE KILLER
Community Member
5 years ago

me on my birthday :)

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#46

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JEFF THE KILLER
Community Member
5 years ago

*taking selfies with said hidden treats *

#47

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Catalina Ioan
Community Member
5 years ago

...unless you bring enough for everybody?

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#50

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Ryon Mikeska
Community Member
5 years ago

points because butthole is my favourite word.

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#51

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Cassie
Community Member
5 years ago

It will be fine tomorrow, though?