If you've been visiting Bored Panda, you know we really like funny signs. But if you're new here (or need a friendly reminder), just check out our publications on 'The Absurd Sign Project' or 'Weird Signs.'
This time, however, let's take a step even further and explore the absurd from a bit closer. For that, we turn to the subreddits 'No Safety Smoking First' and 'Don't Open Dead Inside.'
These two online communities mirror each other really well, and are full of signs with questionable spelling, messed up kerning, and other mistakes that prohibit them from getting the point across. If there even is one!
This post may include affiliate links.
Heal Thy Burgers
If they're already burgers, I think it's gotten a little too late to heal em
Is It Now?
Just Do Nothing, It Is Impossible
Le Tits Now
Can We Just Make This The Icon Already?
How The Hell Do You Open This Door?
Come Naked. Try. Our Chalupa
Hvad Alena Pptiny Yes
Combat Loneliness
They Know All Nasa Your Stupid Is A Hoax Astronots
Unfortunately These Are Just Activists Against The Monopolization Of My Campus' Food Distribution Services, Not A Polyamorous Sex Club :(
What
Sbren Sbeve
Eliminating Women Empowering Racism
Unfortunately there are people out there who totally would use that slogan in all seriousness if they thought they could get away with it.
Mental Is Hocus. Health Not Pocus. 🎃
Ah yes, high time we learned to appreciate the inherent hocus-ness of mental health.
Getting Is An Drunk Never Excuse (Mind The Comedy Homicide)
The fact you have to have an ad campaign for this is disturbing.
We Don't Care. Stop
Get Covid Here, Your Vaccine Ages 12 And Up
Never Do Your Best Quit
Cheating Garage All Must Go!
Hmmm can I get this wife on discount? I is from the cheating garage. ________________________________All like her must go--does that men that you KILLED YOUR WIFE? Well not really... Poor guy got no wife anymore.
Don’t Save A Life! Be Afraid To Give Blood
My Boyfriend Sent Me This Picture And
Does This Belong Here Or On R/Dontopendeadinside ?
Winners Quitters Never Quit, Never Win
Land Of The Not Land Of The Home Of The Not Home Of Free Stay At Home Brave The Afriad
Ask About Mud Me My Flaps
...what
Yeah, There's Definitely No Turtle Inside. Feel Free To Discard
Pizza! Pizza!! P I Z Z A A A A
Dunno If This Has Been Posted Already. A Friend Sent Me This:
To Be Clever
...a Month Lasts Forever
If You Hard. Then You Hard. Work|play
Always Forgotten, Remembered Never
Remembered never? Not quite. We'll always have "still a better love story than Twilight" as a memorial.
I Was Informed That This Is Better Suited For This Sub So Here Ya Go
Someone had the brilliant idea to translate Smash Mouth to Arameic and back again and it's amazing. https://www.newshub.co.nz/home/entertainment/2019/08/smash-mouth-s-all-star-translated-to-aramaic-and-back-becomes-beautiful-poetry.html
Jesus Is Christ Lord
Isn't Jesus technically second to God? Or am I getting my bibles crossed here?
It’s a Trinity 🥰. And I have to say, any way you read the truck works! I like this one!
Load More Replies...
What it says isn't as important as how it's written. By the time the motorist in back figures out what it says he/she will be meeting Jesus.
Correct way to read is left-right, but then it would be "The Second Almighty To God None"
I agree that it kind of works either way you read it. I like that if you read each door separately, the left door could be interpreted as someone exasperatedly saying "Christ, Lord! Second to none.". I don't know why someone would be exasperated when saying that, but I found it funny anyway.
"Jesus is Christ Lord" still works. "The SECOND Almighty to God None" is a bigger problem.
The existence of God and Jesus as his avatar is so obvious we need entire trailers and billboards advertising it all over the country.
How is it obvious? Are you taking the word of a two thousand year old book? Why would we need billboards advertising stupidity?
Load More Replies...
Suddenly... Hairstylist
Got Straw? How About Heated Ones For Pets?
Made South In Africa
Don’t Never Drink And Drive. Drive High!
Let’s Beat The Children All Covid For
Your I Had To Mom Is So Spread This Fat Between 3 Books
They You What Will You
It's almost like a literal translation of an argument in Latin. "They you what will you?" "Will say you never made!" "Forget and did forget them!" "What forget? They how feel!"
Amber Of Will, You Are My You, The Love Life Marry Me?
Nach
Please Entrance, Keep Clear!
Who Thought This Would Be A Good Idea
The chamber has been enemies of BE of secrets opened the heir... WARE!
What Melt About Waffle?
This Physically Hurts Me
Be Be Be Kind Careful Yourself
Note: this post originally had 105 images. It’s been shortened to the top 50 images based on user votes.
You know most of these make sense if you know how to read. Left to right
Clear ants.
I thought they were being smartasses and I smirked while telling them I liked their sign. but no-- they didn't see anything funny and this was genuinely how they spelled "clearance" Clear-Ants...6-jpeg.jpg 
And this is why I get paid BIG BUCKS as an advertising artist. Everyone thinks they can do it themselves, and sometimes they can . . . most of the time you get this!
Many of these can be described as "If motivational quotes were honest"
Live in Alabama myself. Wasn't particularly offended by any of it. Then again, I'm not hunting for reasons to be offended either.
Load More Replies...
You know most of these make sense if you know how to read. Left to right
Clear ants.
I thought they were being smartasses and I smirked while telling them I liked their sign. but no-- they didn't see anything funny and this was genuinely how they spelled "clearance" Clear-Ants...6-jpeg.jpg
And this is why I get paid BIG BUCKS as an advertising artist. Everyone thinks they can do it themselves, and sometimes they can . . . most of the time you get this!
Many of these can be described as "If motivational quotes were honest"
Live in Alabama myself. Wasn't particularly offended by any of it. Then again, I'm not hunting for reasons to be offended either.
Load More Replies...