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Someone Writes Hilarious Animal Reviews, And The Reason Why Dogs Get Only 4 Out Of 5 Stars Will Crack You Up
What's your favorite animal? We all have our preferences, often formed when we are kids and based on not much in particular. Mine is a fox, mainly because my favorite football team is nicknamed the Foxes, and they are clever and sly. Now Charlie, the brains behind 'Welcome to my meme page' has started giving the best reviews on animals in a tongue-in-cheek way, and they are tons of fun to read.
“I've been trying out different sorts of comedy writing formats for a while,” Charlie told Bored Panda. “Ideas come out of nowhere. One day I thought a funny review of Snakes would be hilarious and it got very popular, and I realized I could probably do a lot more of these without it getting too old.”
Such has been the popularity of Charlie's fake reviews, a book is now on the way. “A funny book of these reviews is in the works as well as a storybook and a mixed media variety book,” he told us. “I am a full-time writer - people seem to enjoy my stuff, and I somehow can attract an audience online with my sense of humor, so it seemed foolish not to try and see where I can take that.”
“My stuff helped me land me a job as a script intern on Conan for my last semester of college, and something about my experience working there and getting to talk to professional writers and comedians told me that I ought to try this for real. Books and games are in the works!”
Charlie really does have a knack for making people laugh, and his first batch of funny animal reviews prove it. From Badgers (sad creatures) to ants (unstoppable) these reviews hilariously highlight the pros and cons of individual species, with the absurdity of it all sure to bring an idiotic smile to your dial! If you just can't get enough, we have a previous post based on Amazon-style animal reviews that you can find here. Scroll down below to check them all out for yourself, and let us know what you think in the comments!
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Ants
Consider me ashamed of myself for being a space cadet and playing Jumpy Jumpy Shooty Shooty bing bing wahoo VIDEO GAMES!
Elephants
Spiders
Snakes
My boa constrictor was unturstworthy - she didnt try to strangle you - she BIT you
Sorry - that made me laugh!! Naughty boa constrictor!
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Snakes are the mascot of Slytherin House, and make a respectable tattoo.
We do actually know how they move. And it's pretty f*****g sweet. https://animals.howstuffworks.com/snakes/snake3.htm
Technically they are not tubes... tubes are generally hollow - snakes have stuff on the inside of them! lol
True. But i was thinking what if the snake open its mouth. Is it a tube then? LOL
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You, author, do not know how they move. It's pretty obvious to the rest of us.
"ils marchent sur leur ventre dans le genre flippant je sais pas ce qu’il vous faut !" For the French people addict to Kaamelott ;)
Snakes are creatures of their environment. Don't let their size fool you a smaller snake once bitten can kill you aka rattler, then one of the larger snakes can be almost harmless and people have them as pets. They are like spiders you never know what you are up against unless you took snake classes in college.
We do know how they move! They grip the earth with their belly scales and pull themselves along that way.
They move by bending the laws of gravity, and harnessing the power of anti-matter from black holes, just like their ancient parallel dimension brothers
They have legs, but they can only bee seen on the upper ultraviolet spectrum.
When you come back from a weekend away and your heat pad had failed - and you have to cuddle the damm cold 6ft snake for 4 hours till it wakes up - then you have to carefully cut a frozen rat into 4 (microwaved) to feed it - oh happy days = lol - the joys of snake ownership
i loved disecting russian hamsters - NOT - mice lollys etc
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Tables
Turtles
Birds
I must be tired because "eat our seeds and then go CACK" nearly made me spit coffee on my desk.
Jellyfish
Moths
Crabs
"If you're too beautiful, the crabs might pinch you and never let go" made me choke on my tea!
Bears
Badgers
Raccoons
I rate this post 2 stars out of 5 for their hillarious writing style. 3 star has been deducted because there is no f*****g CAT in it!!!
I rate Fajarjarjar 4/5 stars for making this joke. One star has been deducted because idk
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So funny! Exactly what is required as an antidote to reading the news these days!
4/5 would read again. One point is deducted for contempt of badgers.
I rate this post 4/5 stars, 1 star has been deducted because there isn't MORE!
I LMAO! Deduct one star for leaving out possums! (See comment under "Raccoons")
Started reading this in Dungeon Keeper Gold narrator guy's voice at some point. Flowerhat.
I refuse to rate this post simply because someone beat me too it. I take several deductions, Which lowers my gross income.
I rate this post 2 stars out of 5 for their hillarious writing style. 3 star has been deducted because there is no f*****g CAT in it!!!
I rate Fajarjarjar 4/5 stars for making this joke. One star has been deducted because idk
Load More Replies... So funny! Exactly what is required as an antidote to reading the news these days!
4/5 would read again. One point is deducted for contempt of badgers.
I rate this post 4/5 stars, 1 star has been deducted because there isn't MORE!
I LMAO! Deduct one star for leaving out possums! (See comment under "Raccoons")
Started reading this in Dungeon Keeper Gold narrator guy's voice at some point. Flowerhat.
I refuse to rate this post simply because someone beat me too it. I take several deductions, Which lowers my gross income.
