It often feels that some people have an entitlement to think that some rules just don’t apply to them. Sometimes, it comes in the form of an unfair policy run by the workplace, schools and universities, and other kinds of organizations that treat people differently. Don't let me even start with how the job market behaves towards men and women, where the inequality and unfairness is so obvious you need no magnifying glass.
So when someone asked “What double standard are you tired of?” on r/AskReddit, it spiraled into an illuminating thread with people sharing unfair examples in our society that they are totally fed up with. Think of basic laws not applying to people with money or power, star student athletes who seem nearly untouchable, or entry-level jobs that require experience—there’s a lot to uncover.
Scroll down below and be sure to share your thoughts on the double standards that have been bugging you lately in the comment section!
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People telling fat people to lose weight but then getting angry at us when we dare show our face in gyms and laugh at us while we exercise, get upset that companies make work out clothes for us because it’s “promoting obesity”, or making comments on every little thing we eat even if it is considered “healthy” when a skinny person who has a metabolism as fast as the flash could post themselves eating an entire pizza and people would be like, “mood” or “that’s so cute!” Or get angry at us for legitimately just existing. I’ll post a picture that isn’t promoting binge eating or ANYTHING of the sort, it’ll be just a picture of me in a dress, and I’ll be bombarded with vile comments for… posting a picture.
I've been big before, and people definitely treat you differently.
Religions preaching love while inciting hate filled conflicts.
Politicians being able to openly violate the law and nobody does anything.
If the punishment for a crime is to pay a fine, that means its legal as long as you can afford it.
Why is dental insurance diffrent from "health insurance" aren't teeth part of my overall health wth!!
There is no reason or logic behind American health care - only greed.
Your boss getting angry if you're a couple minutes late but then expects you to have no problem regularly staying on 2+ hours after your shift is meant to end.
Parenting double standards. The gender of the parent does not make the parent. Dads are not "babysitting" their children, they are parenting.
Tied with the classic stereotype that men don't care about parenting and see it as some kind of chore. Doubled with tge new stereotype that men showing care for children are creepy
Billionaires calling poor people lazy.
Me, a non smoker, being told off for being 5 minutes late to work. While smokers spend 30 mins at least a day on smoke breaks.
Celebrities lecturing about climate change when they have the carbon footprint of a small town..
When women get shamed for sleeping with a lot of people but men get applauded for it
Idk I find it gross
And somehow sex with different men makes you a s**t but lots of sex with one man doesn't.
Consumers are expected to curb the use of their plastic waste and carbon by corporations and regulatory bodies alike while Nestlé will destroy a natural habitat to make bottled water in plastic bottles and dump the waste into your grandma's urn if its affordable.
Defending yourself. The fact that someone can punished for defending themselves when no one else would, in my experience worse, is bullsh*t to me. Example a former bullied kid that punched back and got screwed
I have to be exactly on time for an appointment or risk a fine and no appointment. Yet a doctor can make you wait hours sometimes without even a "thank you for waiting" or "sorry about the wait"
I had an appointment with my GP at 8.30 AM. I was her first patient of that day. She showed up at 8.55 without as much as an apology. So I told her that I'd be looking for a new GP who was able to read the clock and knew what respect for their patients meant. I left her office telling her that I wasn't interested in her diagnose, because someone as unprofessional as her could not be trusted. It took me some effort, but I found a GP who does know how to manage his time.
There are a lot of double standards between the genders that need to die, many of which have been touched on in the thread, but I'll share one from quite literally a few days ago.
I'm male and have a pretty good-sized beard. At a social gathering the other day, a woman complimented it but then asked "Do you ever let people stroke it?" I replied that I did not, but then another woman spoke up with "Well why not? Isn't it flattering? Wouldn't you like the attention?" Not at all hostile, just blatantly "Why not?"
To that I replied "How would you feel if someone walked up to you and said 'Oh I love your hair, can I run my fingers through it?'" while miming making a stroking motion.
She recoiled and said "Of course not. That's super creepy." Followed almost a second later by a round-eyed "OH."
Ladies/Gentlemen, if you don't want someone doing it to you, then why would you think it would be okay for you to do it to someone else?
After swim practice when I was 11 my "friends" pushed me out of the shower room and held the door closed when a bunch of older ladies were getting together for water aerobics. One of em was my teacher. They laughed and I just stood there naked pushing on a door. Nobody got in trouble.
If they pushed a girl naked out of the locker room and held the door it'd be on the news.
Yep. Its like men arent supposed to feel embarrassment, fear or sadness. It seems the only things we are "allowed" to feel are happy, horny, or angry.
How it’s perfectly okay for a potential employer to ask your salary expectations even before an interview, but a candidate asking what the job pays is somehow a red flag for HR and a big no-no.
Like, if all the employer cares about is what I will cost them (before learning anything else about me), then I should be able to f*cking ask too. But no, I’m branded as only caring about money. And you don’t you corporate prick?
Young adult women: old enough to decide that they permanently want to have/raise a child, not old enough to decide whether they want to permanently NOT have children. I lucked into a good doctor that gave me a hysterectomy at 29, but that's an extreme rarity.
Men not being allowed to be feminine without being labeled as gay.
I am gay, and the amount of times friends, family, and coworkers will point at a man being mildly effeminate and whisper "I think he plays for your team" is nauseating. Like, dude, he's literally married to a woman and has kids. Just because he talks in a slightly higher pitch does not mean he wants the D.
Simply taking care of yourself is almost considered gay among some men these days
To borrow from Matt Haig: people being ok with mental illness until someone shows symptoms of one
I'm not ok with people (and their families, guardians, state) being diagnosed with a serious mental illness and not being treated. For example, Squizofrenia es a very grave malady, even when being called Bipolar Disorder. I have been a witness of individuals creating mayhem, and afterward, calmy saying, "Oh, I have bipolar disorder." The supreme court ruling that found "free of involuntary institutionalization" sufferers of mental illnesses does not make them healed. Also, nobody indeed wants to pay for treatment, so many are ending in the streets are wrongly called homeless, drug addicts, prostitutes, petty criminals, and jails and prisons main population. Mental illnesses should be covered by Medicaid, long-term, and free of charge due to their impact on society. Individual action, other than personally financing the full treatment of a sufferer, always will fall short. Good intentions and acceptance are mostly self-gratification.
As a male I cannot take my son to a playground without getting a few strange looks. It's annoying.
Star student athletes are nearly untouchable. If they make the school look good the school will almost never take action against them.
Brock Turner. What a disgusting little maggot. He should still be behind bars.
Basic laws not applying to people with money or power. I thought the US was based on an idea that nobody was above the law.
Struggled with social interactions growing up. Half of my life was people telling me not to take things so personally. The other half was being told to conduct myself a certain way so I don't upset people.
In regards to the NFL, a head coach was fired because of racist and homophobic emails. He ABSOLUTELY deserves to be fired, absolutely. However Desean Jackson openly said Hitler was right about Jews, Antonio Brown has multiple assault allegations against him, Richard Sherman has an assault case against him, Tyreek Hill has audio of him threatening his child and GF with violence, as well as beat the brakes off his college GF, and SO MUCH MORE. These men are still in the league.
The double standard that I am sick of is that in the NFL for some reason words are treated way more harshly than actual physical violence.
I love football and am a die hard fan, but I truly dislike the double standard in the league today.
Some people I know who are strongly against gender norms told me that I shouldn’t have a say in my wedding since I’m a man…and that my fiancé alone makes the decisions.
It was pretty freakin confusing.
When company’s say they are family friendly but don’t want you to work from home or help with child care.
At me current workplace we're not allowed to work more than 50% from home, because working from home is a luxury they say, even though it's perfectly possible in this line of work. It almost seems like they want us to come to the office so they can keep better track of what we're doing and control us more easily
Corporations can take advantage of employees, but employees can’t take advantage of corporations.
My principal taking days to read and reply to my emails, if ever, VS me being told at 8 in the morning that I should have known something because he sent me an email at 10 in the evening the night before.
Covid restrictions applying to regular people but not celebrities or politicians
🙄 I work on film sets and everyone must wear a mask but no one enforces the rules for the cast or Director, producer etc when we’re not shooting.
Apparently, politicians are allowed to disrespect the citizens of the country they serve but it's frowned upon to tell a politician to "go f*ck yourself" to their face.
Respect is respect. No matter if it wears a suit or what language it uses
When jobs say they like to develop and promote internally then hire externally and wonder why you arent happy.
My mum is exceptional at her job and is one of the highest rated workers in her agency. She has been doing APS5 work for a while now even though her position is an APS4. She has to sit for an interview to get the APS5 position. The problem is my mum doesn't cope well with the interview process (recently diagnosed with ASD). She has had 3 interviews and been denied the higher level and instead they have hired outsiders that don't have the experience. My mum has had enough, she has told them to no longer give her APS5 work. If she's not going to get paid for doing the more complicated stuff, then they can shove it. Her boss and bosses boss have vouched for her but because she works for the government there are specific guidelines they have to follow in regards to the hiring process. She can't just get a promotion without being successful in the interview. It really isn't fair at all.
It's perfectly acceptable for women to wear short skirts and no sleeves on the workfloor if a man does it it's seen as a big no no. If's it's 34degrees outside plz don't make me wear long sleeves and pants i'm melting away.
The opposite was true when I was in school. South Africa we have uniforms. Girls had to wear short dresses throughout winter with either stockings or knee high socks. 50% of my school memories were of me being freezing cold. Not sure if girls have more options nowadays.
Men being able to go topless but women can’t.
I always felt awkward when men don't wear upper body clothing. Sometimes you just don't want to see that
I once saw a photo of a dad with his baby who by accident latched on to the dad's nipple, and it was all hoots and giggles but I thought if a woman were to show this with her breast out we'd be yelling shame and shameful. Why?
I’m happy with people going shirtless if they want. I think that those who do (without having gone to the gym for months beforehand) show body confidence I wish I possessed when I was younger. I do feel that many who do so in order to display a gym honed body seem to do so for reasons of vanity rather than comfort. Hey - each to their own. Life’s way too short to care about such trivial things.
I saw an interesting test of that whole concept at a Tig Nataro comedy show. She's young and had breast cancer and had a double mastectomy. She has chosen not to have breast reconstruction. Therefore, no breasts, no nothing on her chest except the scars. She was talking about something like this and proceeded to take her shirt off and place it on the chair. Talk about feel the audience squirm right through the TV. Why? Because she's a woman and took her shirt off in public.
i still don't understand that decision. Note that it's the legal decision, not the moral question that i don't like. As i understand it, they said it should be legal because female breasts are not sexual. There's a billion dollar industry well represented across Canada that depends on the fact that women's breasts are sexual. Also, and this of course is just my experience, but 100% of the women and very few of the men i've, er, investigated this with, have found touching of their breasts to be sexually arousing, to the point where they frequently do it themselves. So what's the proof for the opposite case? LIke genuine question, i don't get it.
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It used to be no problem in Western European countries. With more diverse cultures immigrating, it has become unacceptable by certain minority groups so women aren't as comfortable anymore sitting topless on the beach. Women even said they don't do it anymore because they were sure they would get assaulted.
Until fully clothed women can walk comfortably and safely in this world I don't see masses of women partaking in public toplessness. Everyone should be able to of course, ideally.
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Completely agree! One man in my apartment complex goes topless all the time, and believe me, nobody wants to see that.
well, as long as men see women's chests as sexually arousing I won't go topless. One of our politicians (female) is trying to pass a notion that women are allowed to swim topless, but honestly, I would feel super uncomfortable because a majority of men can't contain themselves and would just stare. No thank you.
Woman want the same rights as men in regards to this comment, but bitch when a man looks. OMG he's sexualizing me. Yeeeet it's ok for those very women to sexualize men. WTAF? This is why some women shouldn't open their mouths.
Like, it’s the same nipple, either have men cover up or don’t bat an eye when women don’t
Most women wouldn't anyways! We have enough problems as it is, I couldn't imagine adding topless problems on top of it! Omg no no no....
Free the butt cheeks too. I want bottom-less pants for everyone. (Pants with holes cut out so the cheeks are exposed)
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In Ontario Canada, women can go top less. It is rarely ever done though.
In the summer, some do. And those who pop over from Detroit join in.
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Breasts are a natural part of the body, they shouldn't be taboo, yes people are occasionally attracted to them, but people shouldn't be forced to cover them up just because other people have kinks ( and for those who are attracted to breasts please do not make others feel uncomfortable in a way which compels them to cover up)
I read that if a woman's bust were not a sexual attribute, all women would be "flat" and the bust would only appear during pregnancy and milk-feeding like all other mammals. I am not a purist, but there is a difference between the chest of a man and a woman, and it's not just about social construct. Nevertheless there are situations when it's not cultular to be shirtless regardless of the gender.
I'm sorry but I'm a bit confused. I don't want to walk around showing my bubbles, unless I'm in a nudist beach. I really don't.
Neither! And tbh I'm not a massive fan of blokes walking round showing their chests off either
Load More Replies... Yes! This upsets me especially when I see men with boobs much bigger than mine.
Funny as this may seem, you just proved OP's point.
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I’m a teacher and called my wife smoking hot at a football game. My principal reprimanded me for it. I told the principal my wife calls me her smoking hot hubby to her class sometimes. She said it’s different because it’s perceived different when a girl says it.
Gotta say it's a little peculiar to be calling your spouse smoking hot in general in front of your class (like I can't imagine a scenario that would call for you sharing that information) but why would it be different for a man than for a woman is beyond me
Note: this post originally had 39 images. It’s been shortened to the top 35 images based on user votes.
What is missing in the list: men/people who will never be able to become pregnant, deciding if a woman can have an abortion if she wants to
I, to my eternal shame, used to be in the camp thanks to my Catholic upbringing that abortion was wrong full stop. Then I learned about rape and incest. Even then I though "other than those two horrific things big whoop, she gets a bit "fat" and has some backpain, that's no excuse to terminate, every mother went through that and they survived" .... then I learned what the ACTUAL impacts can be on a pregnant woman's body after reading the story of a young mother whos TEETH FELL OUT (every single one of them!!) and who is constantly made fun of because of this, because it turns out (duh) that the developing foetus gets the calcium it needs for its bones from the mother's own calcium supply ... in her case it was the jaw bones and the teeth themselves. And that shocked me enough that I actually did some proper research. Now I'm 100% in the camp of "it's her body, her choice". Not to mention the immorality behind a complete stranger dictating what you can and cannot do with your own body.
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Men wearing a kilt and (usually) women thinking it is perfectly acceptable to lift it, try and look under it, put a hand up it and grab your 'equipment' and then say "It's only a bit of fun"
Nothing about domestic violence/abuse in general? Huge double standard there.
No there isn't. A lot of places now have 0 tolerance laws and it doesn't matter what gender you are. The double standard is starting to thin out as people are realizing it's just as wrong for a girl to smack a guy around. Unfortunately men still feel shame, and are shamed by others, for coming forward. That's a societal problem but not necessarily a double standard where it's socially acceptable to the point we just accept it as it is the way it is.
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Another double standard: Men are "allowed" to have gray hair, they're still attractive and desirable. Women need to dye their hair, otherwise they have supposedly given up and are no longer seen as attractive
This is more of a personal preference and a fear of aging. I'm not sure if it's an attractiveness thing or something else. My mom dyes her hair and continues until it's all white. She doesn't like the salt and pepper look. There are women who do dye their hair gray, and it's become a trend, and this is among 20 year olds. Some women just aren't ready to see themselves aging because it is scary. It's a reminder you're not immortal and one day you'll be old and one day you'll die. That is a very scary thing to think about it.
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if you say youre black and proud thats great but if you say youre white and proud youre a racist lol
People saying that they are white and proud usually are racists. Black people have been told for ages that they basically amount to nothing, so to them it is defying the people who have been putting them all that time. White supremacists use "White and proud" as another attempt to insult POC. So sad that you aren't able to understand that.
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If there's one thing about people I don't get, it's double standards. What is it I need to think?
Didn't have time to comment on everything. But I did have time to UPVote everything. Hope this helps.
The idea that ALL white people are racist purely because they are white - and for no other reason - and that it isn't even POSSIBLE for anyone who isn't white TO be a racist. This, in of itself, is a racist opinion to have. I have personally seen a lot of quite open and blatant racist comments directed towards white people by non-white people and nobody ever calls them out on it and if you try you're immediately branded a racist instead and they are defended to the hilt. Also this strange idea that white people cannot possibly understand what a slave went through because only black people were slaves, yet those same people claiming this have no idea that the very word "slave" itself comes from the slang for "Slavic" since at the time people from Slavic nations (who were most definitely white) were the most numerable slaves within the slave trade worldwide. The truth is almost every nation on earth has not only owned slaves at some point in time - every nation has had their citizens BE slaves too.
A guy I work with dashing out of the office 2 hours early for his kids baseball game, which was okay - and then the owner wants to start a detailed discussion with me, 5 minutes before I need to leave to catch my bus. (It took 3 buses and a trolley for the hour & 45 minute commute home). It happened repeatedly, even though I told him REPEATEDLY I had a bus to catch. I finally just told him he'd have to send me an email, which I would read when I got home. I never felt like my time was respected.
Most of these double standards exist because the majority of people still support them. Where a reasonable person might disagree with one double standard but will actively defend another. The usual reason is that it's convenient to them. Also ladies.....most of your double standards are reinforced by other women.
Women being made fun of for taking long showers or taking a long time to get ready, but then women also being made fun of for not shaving their legs, or not having perfect hair and make up
Male strippers who complain about women getting a bit hands on during shows and getting told, "you should be glad of the attention" or "lighten up, it's just a bit of fun". If a man tried to grope a female stripper he'd be strung up by the balls.
What is missing in the list: men/people who will never be able to become pregnant, deciding if a woman can have an abortion if she wants to
I, to my eternal shame, used to be in the camp thanks to my Catholic upbringing that abortion was wrong full stop. Then I learned about rape and incest. Even then I though "other than those two horrific things big whoop, she gets a bit "fat" and has some backpain, that's no excuse to terminate, every mother went through that and they survived" .... then I learned what the ACTUAL impacts can be on a pregnant woman's body after reading the story of a young mother whos TEETH FELL OUT (every single one of them!!) and who is constantly made fun of because of this, because it turns out (duh) that the developing foetus gets the calcium it needs for its bones from the mother's own calcium supply ... in her case it was the jaw bones and the teeth themselves. And that shocked me enough that I actually did some proper research. Now I'm 100% in the camp of "it's her body, her choice". Not to mention the immorality behind a complete stranger dictating what you can and cannot do with your own body.
Load More Replies... Men wearing a kilt and (usually) women thinking it is perfectly acceptable to lift it, try and look under it, put a hand up it and grab your 'equipment' and then say "It's only a bit of fun"
Nothing about domestic violence/abuse in general? Huge double standard there.
No there isn't. A lot of places now have 0 tolerance laws and it doesn't matter what gender you are. The double standard is starting to thin out as people are realizing it's just as wrong for a girl to smack a guy around. Unfortunately men still feel shame, and are shamed by others, for coming forward. That's a societal problem but not necessarily a double standard where it's socially acceptable to the point we just accept it as it is the way it is.
Load More Replies... Another double standard: Men are "allowed" to have gray hair, they're still attractive and desirable. Women need to dye their hair, otherwise they have supposedly given up and are no longer seen as attractive
This is more of a personal preference and a fear of aging. I'm not sure if it's an attractiveness thing or something else. My mom dyes her hair and continues until it's all white. She doesn't like the salt and pepper look. There are women who do dye their hair gray, and it's become a trend, and this is among 20 year olds. Some women just aren't ready to see themselves aging because it is scary. It's a reminder you're not immortal and one day you'll be old and one day you'll die. That is a very scary thing to think about it.
Load More Replies... if you say youre black and proud thats great but if you say youre white and proud youre a racist lol
People saying that they are white and proud usually are racists. Black people have been told for ages that they basically amount to nothing, so to them it is defying the people who have been putting them all that time. White supremacists use "White and proud" as another attempt to insult POC. So sad that you aren't able to understand that.
Load More Replies... If there's one thing about people I don't get, it's double standards. What is it I need to think?
Didn't have time to comment on everything. But I did have time to UPVote everything. Hope this helps.
The idea that ALL white people are racist purely because they are white - and for no other reason - and that it isn't even POSSIBLE for anyone who isn't white TO be a racist. This, in of itself, is a racist opinion to have. I have personally seen a lot of quite open and blatant racist comments directed towards white people by non-white people and nobody ever calls them out on it and if you try you're immediately branded a racist instead and they are defended to the hilt. Also this strange idea that white people cannot possibly understand what a slave went through because only black people were slaves, yet those same people claiming this have no idea that the very word "slave" itself comes from the slang for "Slavic" since at the time people from Slavic nations (who were most definitely white) were the most numerable slaves within the slave trade worldwide. The truth is almost every nation on earth has not only owned slaves at some point in time - every nation has had their citizens BE slaves too.
A guy I work with dashing out of the office 2 hours early for his kids baseball game, which was okay - and then the owner wants to start a detailed discussion with me, 5 minutes before I need to leave to catch my bus. (It took 3 buses and a trolley for the hour & 45 minute commute home). It happened repeatedly, even though I told him REPEATEDLY I had a bus to catch. I finally just told him he'd have to send me an email, which I would read when I got home. I never felt like my time was respected.
Most of these double standards exist because the majority of people still support them. Where a reasonable person might disagree with one double standard but will actively defend another. The usual reason is that it's convenient to them. Also ladies.....most of your double standards are reinforced by other women.
Women being made fun of for taking long showers or taking a long time to get ready, but then women also being made fun of for not shaving their legs, or not having perfect hair and make up
Male strippers who complain about women getting a bit hands on during shows and getting told, "you should be glad of the attention" or "lighten up, it's just a bit of fun". If a man tried to grope a female stripper he'd be strung up by the balls.
