Boss Cancels Child-Free Woman’s Christmas Leave, Quickly Regrets It When She Quits
Should parents get priority when it comes to taking annual leave at work? The answer largely depends on who you ask. Some might argue that those with young kids deserve the time off more, especially over Christmas. Then there are those who say, “Just because I don’t have children doesn’t mean I don’t have family, or plans.”
A child-free nurse found herself in quite a predicament recently. After working for the past 6 Christmases, she decided to take this year off. The woman put in her leave well in advance, only to have it canceled so that a “new mom” colleague could take time off instead. When HR refused to hear her out, she promptly quit, leaving the new mom to work anyway. Was she wrong?
Working over the holiday season is often part and parcel of being a nurse
Image credits: Freepik (not the actual photo)
But when this woman’s boss suddenly canceled her leave to give time off to a new mom, she didn’t take it lightly
Image credits: Alena Darmel/Pexels (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Skydancer-Fun1899
Should parents get priority when it comes to taking leave over the holiday season?
Image credits: Taryn Elliott/Pexels (not the actual photo)
You should treat all your staff equally, especially when approving holiday requests. That’s according to BrightHR’s Alan Price. The expert argues that it’s important for management to follow this rule so that they aren’t seen to favor parents over other staff, aka unfair treatment.
It’s not up to you to decide who’s more deserving of the time off, he warns.
“For example, if one of your employees has booked last-minute flights to Ibiza and the other wants a week off to go camping with their kids, you shouldn’t decide who gets the time off based on their plans,” Price explains. “Instead, put a process in place to make sure that annual leave gets shared out equally.”
The HR expert says many companies operate on a first-come, first-served basis because it helps to level the playing field for staff.
But he adds that it does have its drawbacks. “For example, there’s always going to be one employee who books all the popular days off at the start of the year, leaving their co-workers to pick up the scraps,” Price says.
To get around this, he advises that managers come up with a creative way to allocate popular days. “You could let your employees pull names out of a hat to decide who gets August bank holiday Monday off or rotate who gets first dibs on Christmas Eve,” suggests Price.
The experts at U.K.-based HR Connect agree that it’s vital to have an equal environment for all employees. They say the best way is to have a clear procedure in place that all staff are aware of when requesting to take holidays. “Of course, it is important to bear in mind that whilst employees can request to take holidays, it is for the employer to determine whether such a request has been accepted or not,” they add.
HR Connect’s team advises managers to be as flexible as possible.
“You may want to consider implementation of a hybrid approach,” suggests the site. “Priority to parents during the summer six-week closure period with all other school closure periods all staff being equal to book leave as and when without priority being given to parents.”
HR Connect notes that we may see a shift in the coming years, adding that there have already been political moves in Britain to have more family-friendly legislation and policies in the workplace.
The team adds that at the end of the day, parents do not, by law, have a right to be prioritized when booking and taking leave.
“Bon voyage!”: Many people sided with the nurse and shared their own similar stories
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As if holidays are only special to people with kids and everyone should just suck it up. Especially this case with a 1 year old and a newborn. They won't even be aware of the holiday.
Exactly my thought! "But Mooooooom, all the other babies are celebrating todaaaaaaay!" Joking aside, my family has sometimes celebrated on December 26 for convenience.
Load More Replies...Prioritising employees with children over those without is illegal where I live. Every employee has the same rights and obligations and that is how it should be. Having kids is a personal choice and so should the consequences be.
I don't know where you are but it is also illegal here in the UK. Plus, if the USA had decent employment rights, a new mum would not have to be working on their baby's first Christmas anyway as she would be on maternity leave.
Load More Replies...as a new mom you shouldnt have to work anyway for a few months but alas im so tired of people hiding behind their kids to always get time off. im always in the belief that you take turns having holidays off and if you cant work a holiday for personal reasons you need to ensure you cover something else to even out the play field. child or no child others still have lives and even just having time off doing nothing is acceptable.
The hospital and entitled coworker deserved what they got. Since OP can get a job easily elsewhere they were quite stupid to think they'd just roll over for their ridiculous policy.
The co-workers can give up their holidays and work instead? Oh, but that would mean THEY suffer, right? Can't have that. When I worked in jobs with Christmas shifts I was always happy to take them, so that my colleagues with kids could be at home. But with the understanding that *should* I want a holiday off, I should get it because I didn't had it for years. Worked like a charm. I used it once or twice.
I can only go abroad during school holidays so I have to book the weeks I want well in advance because if someone else on the team gets in first then too bad for me. I have already booked. 2 weeks off next August and a week in April. We are currently putting in our Christmas requests but this does not mean we will get it as the whole dept needs to coordinate so there is cover. OP is 100% NTA she did the right thing by booking months in advance.
NTA. we are in the middle of planning our time off for next year and if I hear one more time how we have to fit around school holidays or other special times because someone who has kids gets dibs I am gonna scream.
"family first", that's literally textbook discrimination,a nd should be sued out of existance
If you're in the US or Canada, discrimination based on family status is illegal and OP should leave the job but also take legal action. It can't have been a great place to work anyway because my family is nearly all in medical/emergency and law enforcement and you either work Christmas or New Year, not bothered if you don't want the money. Usually younger folk want New Year's off and older people want Christmas, but really unusual that someone who isn't keen for the holiday overtime to work both .
I was a single mom after my ex-husband decided he really didn't want to be a father after all. I always put in requests for holiday time off extremely early, and I never expected someone else to give up their time off due to my lack of planning.
Why was the new mom working anyways - she should be on her baby leave. Yes I know americans do not have this, but honestly they should! Even dogs get to care for their pups for a few moths before starting hunting again.
1. That type of policy is illegal where I live. 2. Their HR dept. is deficient.
F**k this people with children should get priority b******t. I work most xmas/new years - two years ago I had the same come up - I booked leave to spend the first xmas as a family since 1990 in August. Come December and there was outrage. So I showed them my flight booking and price and said are they willing to pay me for them to cover the people who take every f*****g holiday off - including school holiday - and deny me my first xmas in over 30 years? Suddenly they STFU.
I have faced the "they have kids" elitist attitude my whole life. From my own parents having 7 of their own, to co-workers leaving for 2-3 months to deal with family and not having a replacement the whole time. One time I was literally the only person working out of 6 people, becaue overlapping vacations and severe influenza, and when I asked for a SINGLE DAY off to get married, they refused. The next year I had to beg and cry to the district manager to get 2 days off for a belated honeymoon. Bias is real.
...good for you, op....the christmas markets are incredible and so much fun.....so much to see and drink and eat.....you will not regret it.....🎄🎄
I wouldn't quit. Quitting ALWAYS forfeits unemployment. I'd simply inform my employer that I was not going to cancel my already paid for, non-refundable arrangements, and let them make of that what they will. If they fire me for it, so be it. I'm no worse off than if I quit, and likely better off, because being fired usually DOESN'T block you from getting unemployment.
This wonan should also look at any advice about employment law because my husband was unfairly dismissed when he still took his approved holiday leave but was told he had to cancel because there was an audit - he won. This lady would have lost some serious money from deposits on hotels and flights. But the holiday had been approved
That sounds like a horrible company to work for! HR should have known they could get sued for discrimination by cancelling the employees approved vacation. What the heck is wrong with people? Anyone who isn't on her side is a massive a-hole.
Sick to FKN DEATH of breeders always getting prioritised.
The above example would absolutely p*ss ne off. I don't mind compromising with my colleagues who have kids - but they also work hard. Example: while we were doing overtime, my colleague hopped out to pick up her kids, then came back to continue working with me. So I do feel lucky not to deal with whiney cr@p.
Load More Replies...I worked years of holidays for everyone who had children. Then when I was sick and booked leave, you should have heard the moaning and nasty comments I got. 7 years of coverage and not one person actually appreciated it. Now I have a child, I take holidays off. I have done my due time and again.
It is a parent's choice to have children and that choice should have no negative impact on anyone else who makes different choices. If you want to have children, that is absolutely fine but it is not ok to expect others to make adjustments to suit your choices or for them to accept any inconvenience or negative effect.
Load More Replies...As if holidays are only special to people with kids and everyone should just suck it up. Especially this case with a 1 year old and a newborn. They won't even be aware of the holiday.
Exactly my thought! "But Mooooooom, all the other babies are celebrating todaaaaaaay!" Joking aside, my family has sometimes celebrated on December 26 for convenience.
Load More Replies...Prioritising employees with children over those without is illegal where I live. Every employee has the same rights and obligations and that is how it should be. Having kids is a personal choice and so should the consequences be.
I don't know where you are but it is also illegal here in the UK. Plus, if the USA had decent employment rights, a new mum would not have to be working on their baby's first Christmas anyway as she would be on maternity leave.
Load More Replies...as a new mom you shouldnt have to work anyway for a few months but alas im so tired of people hiding behind their kids to always get time off. im always in the belief that you take turns having holidays off and if you cant work a holiday for personal reasons you need to ensure you cover something else to even out the play field. child or no child others still have lives and even just having time off doing nothing is acceptable.
The hospital and entitled coworker deserved what they got. Since OP can get a job easily elsewhere they were quite stupid to think they'd just roll over for their ridiculous policy.
The co-workers can give up their holidays and work instead? Oh, but that would mean THEY suffer, right? Can't have that. When I worked in jobs with Christmas shifts I was always happy to take them, so that my colleagues with kids could be at home. But with the understanding that *should* I want a holiday off, I should get it because I didn't had it for years. Worked like a charm. I used it once or twice.
I can only go abroad during school holidays so I have to book the weeks I want well in advance because if someone else on the team gets in first then too bad for me. I have already booked. 2 weeks off next August and a week in April. We are currently putting in our Christmas requests but this does not mean we will get it as the whole dept needs to coordinate so there is cover. OP is 100% NTA she did the right thing by booking months in advance.
NTA. we are in the middle of planning our time off for next year and if I hear one more time how we have to fit around school holidays or other special times because someone who has kids gets dibs I am gonna scream.
"family first", that's literally textbook discrimination,a nd should be sued out of existance
If you're in the US or Canada, discrimination based on family status is illegal and OP should leave the job but also take legal action. It can't have been a great place to work anyway because my family is nearly all in medical/emergency and law enforcement and you either work Christmas or New Year, not bothered if you don't want the money. Usually younger folk want New Year's off and older people want Christmas, but really unusual that someone who isn't keen for the holiday overtime to work both .
I was a single mom after my ex-husband decided he really didn't want to be a father after all. I always put in requests for holiday time off extremely early, and I never expected someone else to give up their time off due to my lack of planning.
Why was the new mom working anyways - she should be on her baby leave. Yes I know americans do not have this, but honestly they should! Even dogs get to care for their pups for a few moths before starting hunting again.
1. That type of policy is illegal where I live. 2. Their HR dept. is deficient.
F**k this people with children should get priority b******t. I work most xmas/new years - two years ago I had the same come up - I booked leave to spend the first xmas as a family since 1990 in August. Come December and there was outrage. So I showed them my flight booking and price and said are they willing to pay me for them to cover the people who take every f*****g holiday off - including school holiday - and deny me my first xmas in over 30 years? Suddenly they STFU.
I have faced the "they have kids" elitist attitude my whole life. From my own parents having 7 of their own, to co-workers leaving for 2-3 months to deal with family and not having a replacement the whole time. One time I was literally the only person working out of 6 people, becaue overlapping vacations and severe influenza, and when I asked for a SINGLE DAY off to get married, they refused. The next year I had to beg and cry to the district manager to get 2 days off for a belated honeymoon. Bias is real.
...good for you, op....the christmas markets are incredible and so much fun.....so much to see and drink and eat.....you will not regret it.....🎄🎄
I wouldn't quit. Quitting ALWAYS forfeits unemployment. I'd simply inform my employer that I was not going to cancel my already paid for, non-refundable arrangements, and let them make of that what they will. If they fire me for it, so be it. I'm no worse off than if I quit, and likely better off, because being fired usually DOESN'T block you from getting unemployment.
This wonan should also look at any advice about employment law because my husband was unfairly dismissed when he still took his approved holiday leave but was told he had to cancel because there was an audit - he won. This lady would have lost some serious money from deposits on hotels and flights. But the holiday had been approved
That sounds like a horrible company to work for! HR should have known they could get sued for discrimination by cancelling the employees approved vacation. What the heck is wrong with people? Anyone who isn't on her side is a massive a-hole.
Sick to FKN DEATH of breeders always getting prioritised.
The above example would absolutely p*ss ne off. I don't mind compromising with my colleagues who have kids - but they also work hard. Example: while we were doing overtime, my colleague hopped out to pick up her kids, then came back to continue working with me. So I do feel lucky not to deal with whiney cr@p.
Load More Replies...I worked years of holidays for everyone who had children. Then when I was sick and booked leave, you should have heard the moaning and nasty comments I got. 7 years of coverage and not one person actually appreciated it. Now I have a child, I take holidays off. I have done my due time and again.
It is a parent's choice to have children and that choice should have no negative impact on anyone else who makes different choices. If you want to have children, that is absolutely fine but it is not ok to expect others to make adjustments to suit your choices or for them to accept any inconvenience or negative effect.
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