Guy Insists His Fiancée Wear A Red Wedding Dress As She’s Not A Virgin And Would Be “Deceiving Guests”, Gets Dumped Instead
Jealousy and insecurity are some of the most unattractive traits in a person. It boggles our minds that there are still people living in the 21st century who judge their significant others for having dated other people before meeting them.
Redditor u/CatOwnerVictim vented to the r/offmychest online community about how her fiancé didn’t want her to wear a white dress to their wedding because she wasn’t a virgin. Read on for the full story, how the internet reacted, and a surprise update.
Bored Panda reached out to u/CatOwnerVictim via Reddit, and we’ll update the article as soon as we hear back from her.
If your partner feels insecure that you’ve dated someone before them, this can put your entire future together in jeopardy
Image credits: Johnstocker (not the actual photo)
A woman shared how her fiancé had a problem with her wearing a white dress to their wedding
Image credits: nebojsa_ki (not the actual photo)
The couple had a massive argument in front of the guy’s mom
Image credits: CatOwnerVictim
Image credits: Đình Luật (not the actual photo)
The story ended with a surprise twist
The redditor told r/offmychest that she was reconsidering marrying ‘Ryan,’ who she’d been together with for 6 years, because of how insecure he was about her dating past. She had one serious boyfriend before him, but he was unable to get over the fact. So much so that he demanded she wears red, not white, to their wedding because she wasn’t a virgin anymore.
The silver lining was that the guy’s mom was completely on redditor u/CatOwnerVictim’s side. “Ryan, his mom and I stood in our living room and argued about my sex life being shown in a dress. His mom stated that he is no longer a virgin either so maybe he should wear red too and he burst out crying,” the OP wrote how his mom stood in solidarity with her.
Many internet users who read the story were bewildered by the guy’s bizarre behavior. They advised the woman to leave him (aka “throw the whole man away”). And that’s exactly what she did! In a short separate post on r/dating_advice, she shared how she had broken off her engagement and would be going on her first date in “many many years.”
She had moved on from ‘Ryan,’ something that many redditors were happy she had the courage to do. Nobody should be forced to stay in a relationship overflowing with jealousy and insecurity.
Image credits: Vivek Dabi (not the actual photo)
The best way to misery and unhappiness is to constantly keep comparing yourself to others. Or, in this case, ‘Ryan’ somehow decided that the fact that he wasn’t the first person his ex-fiancée dated was somehow more important than having a loving relationship with her. So-called retrospective jealousy is actually a common issue for couples.
It’s what happens when one or both partners feel jealous about the other’s past. They feel like something that happened years ago might threaten their current relationship, so they keep dwelling on this fact, instead of embracing it and letting it go.
Some examples of retrospective jealousy include wondering if your significant other’s previous partners were better lovers, whether they want to go back to them, and whether they still fondly remember their time together. Instead of focusing on the present and how great the relationship might be going, you keep ruminating about the past which you literally can’t control. You’re getting worked up and endangering your future together over memories. Fortunately, there are ways to get around this common mind trap. But they require some messy introspection and work with your emotions—something that not every individual is willing to do.
Looked at their Reddit profile, she broke off the engagement thankfully.
Thank you for sharing the update! What a relief. He was a raving misogynist with literal archaic views
They actually wrote that in the article too (that she broke off the engagement and she is going on a date with someone else), it's just buried in pages and pages off BP's verbosity. Do the writers get paid by line? It's really weird but yeah I always have to skim to see the relative points.
good for her
thank god. he was a controlling a*****e b***h
Phew! That could have gone terribly bad.
TLDR, but was he a virgin? Either way, no go!
He was a virgin when they ment and started to go out. She was not. She had one other partner for 4 years before she got together with this one. In caused stress in their first year being together.
Update: she left him
🥳🥳🥳
Virginity is just a scam anyway
There is some information where if both partners are virgins it helps their long term bonding, partially because they haven't had alternative experiences to compare with what they've had with their partner. IMO that could be better if the partner has a decent sexual education beyond the biological basics. I think the evidence has shown that this impacts the woman more but that there are certain numbers where each woman or man tend to better pair bond with their partner.
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Wtf??!! 😂😂😂 Ok humour me. How is virginity a scam? Wtaf?
How is it not? Especially when (some) people do butt stuff and mouth stuff just to claim they're still virgins. Or stating that someone being a virgin is "pure", inferring that everyone who has had sex is impure, which is hilarious. Or stating the defining factor is an intact hymen lol. I weep for humanity, and the seemingly infinite ways we are stupid, irrational, illogical, cruel, and self-centered.
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
I do not even know what your are talking about! Pure?! I forget this is American panda where people look for ways to misinterpret what you say so they can platform. Sorry dude. I meant what is the scam? You are a virgin or you are not. I didn't know there was all these other weighted intricacies involved in what you are talking about. I thought America was a developed country? Or have you all worked out a way to capitalise on virginity too. That is a weird attitudes to sex if this is a thing. So how is it not?
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
Also very sexist. Butt stuff. Mouth stuff. Yet your definition of virginity is hymen related? So only girls are virgins? Are you saying boys cannot be virgins? I can't even with this stuff.
It is clear you do not understand what I was attempting to say. My basic point was that whether or not a person has had sex is irrelevant. Virginity, itself, is inconsequential. It's moot. The "scam" is that it's even a topic of discussion. The potential *results* from someone having sex (diseases/children) are relevant to their partner, of course, but that's the extent of it. Proclaiming someone as a virgin on their wedding day infers that virginity holds value, which it does not.
Girls are the only ones anyone seems to care about ,when it comes to "saving themselves" for marriage.Boys/men can do whatever the F they like but girls/women are supposed to be "pure".It's ridiculous in this day and age.
Agreed 👍
I don't know what era you live in but you have very old fashioned ideas. As pointed out, the idea of virginity being a purity issue, seems to only be an issue in one developed country. There is no pressure on girls to be 'pure' where I live. Insanity. Also, as said before, you are coming from your perspective which seems American based. Is that hard to understand? It may be a thing in your country but not in others. Hence the original question. How is being a virgin a scam. It is clear you couldn't understand what I was attempting to say. It is simply a stage of human developement that we all experience. Capiche?
Look, read the comments again, yours included. You’re acting like a troll and thats why people are downvoting you. Zaks is saying ”virginity [as in the human made concept and practise] is a scam”, which is miles away from your seeming understanding as ”being a virgin is a scam”. Zaks is saying that whether one is a virgin or not doesn’t matter. Virginity or non-virginity shouldn’t be a feature that enables one to do this and that. You’re basically arguing with Zak while having the same opinion as him…and being really confrontational about it.
Ooof. Stop projecting. And no. Not a troll. I do struggle to understand how some people think. My initial response was not even to Zak. It was a reply to Samuel Pelaton who said virginity is just a scam. Whereupon I said wrt how is virginity a scam. Which is when dear Zak responded with all with a diatribe about butt stuff and bla bla bla. And somehow, days later, I am still being deliberately taken out of context. What you need to understand, that a lot of the rest of the developed western world are not putting prizes or importance on virginity. That is you weirdos in America. A reason as a country you are so divided because you keep jamming your own pesonal interpretations of things down each others throat. I don't care about downvotes. I am comfortable in myself. I do take execption to being taken out of context and deliberately pilliored. Last word. My initial comment still stands because the entire concept is ludicrous. Everyone ok now?
Looked at their Reddit profile, she broke off the engagement thankfully.
Thank you for sharing the update! What a relief. He was a raving misogynist with literal archaic views
They actually wrote that in the article too (that she broke off the engagement and she is going on a date with someone else), it's just buried in pages and pages off BP's verbosity. Do the writers get paid by line? It's really weird but yeah I always have to skim to see the relative points.
good for her
thank god. he was a controlling a*****e b***h
Phew! That could have gone terribly bad.
TLDR, but was he a virgin? Either way, no go!
He was a virgin when they ment and started to go out. She was not. She had one other partner for 4 years before she got together with this one. In caused stress in their first year being together.
Update: she left him
🥳🥳🥳
Virginity is just a scam anyway
There is some information where if both partners are virgins it helps their long term bonding, partially because they haven't had alternative experiences to compare with what they've had with their partner. IMO that could be better if the partner has a decent sexual education beyond the biological basics. I think the evidence has shown that this impacts the woman more but that there are certain numbers where each woman or man tend to better pair bond with their partner.
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
Wtf??!! 😂😂😂 Ok humour me. How is virginity a scam? Wtaf?
How is it not? Especially when (some) people do butt stuff and mouth stuff just to claim they're still virgins. Or stating that someone being a virgin is "pure", inferring that everyone who has had sex is impure, which is hilarious. Or stating the defining factor is an intact hymen lol. I weep for humanity, and the seemingly infinite ways we are stupid, irrational, illogical, cruel, and self-centered.
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
I do not even know what your are talking about! Pure?! I forget this is American panda where people look for ways to misinterpret what you say so they can platform. Sorry dude. I meant what is the scam? You are a virgin or you are not. I didn't know there was all these other weighted intricacies involved in what you are talking about. I thought America was a developed country? Or have you all worked out a way to capitalise on virginity too. That is a weird attitudes to sex if this is a thing. So how is it not?
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
Also very sexist. Butt stuff. Mouth stuff. Yet your definition of virginity is hymen related? So only girls are virgins? Are you saying boys cannot be virgins? I can't even with this stuff.
It is clear you do not understand what I was attempting to say. My basic point was that whether or not a person has had sex is irrelevant. Virginity, itself, is inconsequential. It's moot. The "scam" is that it's even a topic of discussion. The potential *results* from someone having sex (diseases/children) are relevant to their partner, of course, but that's the extent of it. Proclaiming someone as a virgin on their wedding day infers that virginity holds value, which it does not.
Girls are the only ones anyone seems to care about ,when it comes to "saving themselves" for marriage.Boys/men can do whatever the F they like but girls/women are supposed to be "pure".It's ridiculous in this day and age.
Agreed 👍
I don't know what era you live in but you have very old fashioned ideas. As pointed out, the idea of virginity being a purity issue, seems to only be an issue in one developed country. There is no pressure on girls to be 'pure' where I live. Insanity. Also, as said before, you are coming from your perspective which seems American based. Is that hard to understand? It may be a thing in your country but not in others. Hence the original question. How is being a virgin a scam. It is clear you couldn't understand what I was attempting to say. It is simply a stage of human developement that we all experience. Capiche?
Look, read the comments again, yours included. You’re acting like a troll and thats why people are downvoting you. Zaks is saying ”virginity [as in the human made concept and practise] is a scam”, which is miles away from your seeming understanding as ”being a virgin is a scam”. Zaks is saying that whether one is a virgin or not doesn’t matter. Virginity or non-virginity shouldn’t be a feature that enables one to do this and that. You’re basically arguing with Zak while having the same opinion as him…and being really confrontational about it.
Ooof. Stop projecting. And no. Not a troll. I do struggle to understand how some people think. My initial response was not even to Zak. It was a reply to Samuel Pelaton who said virginity is just a scam. Whereupon I said wrt how is virginity a scam. Which is when dear Zak responded with all with a diatribe about butt stuff and bla bla bla. And somehow, days later, I am still being deliberately taken out of context. What you need to understand, that a lot of the rest of the developed western world are not putting prizes or importance on virginity. That is you weirdos in America. A reason as a country you are so divided because you keep jamming your own pesonal interpretations of things down each others throat. I don't care about downvotes. I am comfortable in myself. I do take execption to being taken out of context and deliberately pilliored. Last word. My initial comment still stands because the entire concept is ludicrous. Everyone ok now?