Math Professor Helps Student Despite Them Failing Her Class For Being Constantly High Or Drunk, And Their E-Mails Go Viral
Substance abuse is dangerous. It creeps on you, tries to become your friend, but can destroy your life if you let it.
Of course, it’s hard to fully comprehend the negative side of drinking and getting high if you haven’t experienced it firsthand. That’s why personal stories about wrecked careers and ruined families are so important. They put things into perspective.
This confession is one of those stories. A young person who learned about the dangers of addiction the hard way has agreed to talk about their struggles with Bored Panda, and hopefully, their experience will prevent at least one of us spiraling down the same shaft.
“Drugs and alcohol became an unhealthy coping mechanism,” the student who wanted to remain anonymous said. “I drank to become comfortably numb and deal with negative emotions. It got to a point where it was just continuous.”
Failing their math class was one of the warning signs. “I started going to AA meetings (I didn’t think I was ‘hardcore’ enough for NA since I only used marijuana, cocaine, and alcohol). I got a sponsor, and started working the steps.”
When they decided to rebuild their life, they knew honesty was the main material. The one that holds everything together. So, instead of making excuses, they told the truth, which really resonated with the professor who failed them.
“Dr. S. is very warm and charming. She seems to genuinely care about her students and makes herself available outside of class to help students that are having trouble,” the student said. “She started a ‘Math Appreciation Society’ and often buys food for students with her own money. She sees it as her moral duty to help people.”
Below is their inspiring story, which shows just how far people can go when they talk to each other. When you finish scrolling through it, consider firing up Bored Panda‘s earlier posts 24 Stunning Before & After Transformations Of People Who Quit Drugs and 59 Before & After Pics That Show What Happens When You Stop Drinking.
I remembered Dr. S. said that if anyone failed Math 25, she would work with them for the rest of the semester. I went back to school after missing two weeks, asked if the offer still stood, and got to work immediately. I had a complete meltdown and ugly-cried in front of her because I was so tired and frustrated. Turns out withdrawal is no fun, and I was angry at myself because I felt years of alcohol and drug abuse had made me… dumb. I used to love math and I was good at it. Now I was struggling with things that should have been easy for me.
I felt I owed her an explanation after the ugly crying incident and wanted to give her an “out”. I knew I had earned my failing grade and didn’t deserve help.
Dr. S. has been super kind and supportive. I met with her every day for the rest of the semester and did all of the exams over again. My withdrawal symptoms were relatively mild. My hands were a little shaky, I couldn’t sleep, and I couldn’t eat much of anything. Thankfully, they didn’t last too long and with Dr. S.’s help, I was able to get a lot done over the last month.
I took the final this morning and scored a 98. Now I’ve gone from an F to a B. This e-mail hit me in the feels and made me cry tears of joy. I got a B?!?!?! Thank you, Dr. S., for being so incredibly kind and patient with me.
People had a lot to say about the recovery
This is a nice story, but I feel for the student she dismissed their family funeral as "a lame excuse". Is there some reason she thinks it's a lie? Because if not, I can't understand why that student doesn't deserve just as much compassion as the one struggling with substance abuse issues. A death in the family should always have higher priority than a quiz at school. I've been in that situation. You should drop everything and deal with the fallout later, because you need to be there for everyone who's still alive.
It depends on how many excuses this student has already given. When my father had a stroke, I went to my professors to let them know that my priority, at the moment, was to make sure my sister (my father's caretaker) was ok and that my father was pulling through. They worked with me on deadlines and quizzes to make sure I was able to keep my grade up. Several months after the stroke, my father passed away. My professors allowed me personal time to help my sister with planning the final arrangements. I am now on my last semester of classes with a current 4.0 GPA. My professors were willing to work with me because I busted my butt the rest of the time I was there. They knew I wouldn't use excuses just to slack off. Maybe this "funeral" student used a different excuse each time a quiz came up to buy more study time for the exams. It's not uncommon. I find honesty and a good track record usually helps professors determine the lame excuses from the legitimate ones.
Load More Replies...I know a lot of judges. You might want to find another way to express your sobriety. :-D tenor.gif
Load More Replies...There are several problems that arise out of substance abuse..the above story is one of them. I tutor and I've often had students that have gotten clean and sober. There are the ones that see everything as a challenge to conquer. They are unstoppable and will do whatever it takes to succeed, even if they struggle to understand the material. Then there are the ones that set up appointments, then cancel at the last minute. They rush through tutoring sessions because they have friends they're meeting for lunch. They have material to study, but ask if you can "summarize it for them." And when they fail the class, they blame everyone but themselves. Alcoholism isn't just about the initial illness, it's about the behaviors that go along with it. In order to stay sober, you don't just have to stay away from the alcohol, you need to readjust your attitude and take responsibility for your actions in everyday life. This student is an example of doing just that. Kudos to both of them.
I will work with every student to the best of my ability to get that passing grade. My reward is the look on their face when they see they were just as smart as I kept telling them they were. If they apply themselves, I will go leaps and bounds for them. Students will struggle and I don't fault them for that. It just means I have to approach teaching them in a different way. And if they're honest with me about their struggles (private or otherwise), I will go the extra mile for them to help them through it because I've been there. But because I've been there, I don't take lame excuses or blase' attitudes. If I'm going to put in the work, so are you.
Load More Replies..."I started going to AA meetings (I didn’t think I was 'hardcore' enough for AA since I only used marijuana, cocaine, and alcohol). I got a sponsor, and started working the steps." --> What happened during the last couple of decades that cocaine is not 'hardcore' anymore?
How old are these students? I'm the UK, school finishes when you are 15/16, then you go on to sixth-form college if you choose to. My friend is in a coma right now, we believe he became injured on a drugs binge. The ventilator will be switched off imminently and we don't know if he will breathe for himself or not. Addiction is very serious.
Fairly recent changes (think it was from 2015) have made it law that UK students must stay in one form of education or another until 18. Can be 6th form college, apprenticeship or traineeship. I am so, so sorry about your friend. Hoping for the best.
Load More Replies...To respond to one comment: the "aloha" makes me think Honolulu CC or Hawaii CC. As to the student with the funeral excuse, I must admit it's a go-to excuse for many students. That said, my daughter started college and the day after her professor gave a "just how many grandparents can die in a semester" talk about lame excuses, my mother did actually die! I wrote him an email to assure him that she really did have a dead grandparent but that I understood why he gave that talk to his classes.
Thank you to this professor for kindness and generosity. I suspect prof has 100s of students and this helpful spirit is above and beyond!
The equation is simple: 1 day + 0 drugs/booze x time = Better living
This is a nice story, but I feel for the student she dismissed their family funeral as "a lame excuse". Is there some reason she thinks it's a lie? Because if not, I can't understand why that student doesn't deserve just as much compassion as the one struggling with substance abuse issues. A death in the family should always have higher priority than a quiz at school. I've been in that situation. You should drop everything and deal with the fallout later, because you need to be there for everyone who's still alive.
It depends on how many excuses this student has already given. When my father had a stroke, I went to my professors to let them know that my priority, at the moment, was to make sure my sister (my father's caretaker) was ok and that my father was pulling through. They worked with me on deadlines and quizzes to make sure I was able to keep my grade up. Several months after the stroke, my father passed away. My professors allowed me personal time to help my sister with planning the final arrangements. I am now on my last semester of classes with a current 4.0 GPA. My professors were willing to work with me because I busted my butt the rest of the time I was there. They knew I wouldn't use excuses just to slack off. Maybe this "funeral" student used a different excuse each time a quiz came up to buy more study time for the exams. It's not uncommon. I find honesty and a good track record usually helps professors determine the lame excuses from the legitimate ones.
Load More Replies...I know a lot of judges. You might want to find another way to express your sobriety. :-D tenor.gif
Load More Replies...There are several problems that arise out of substance abuse..the above story is one of them. I tutor and I've often had students that have gotten clean and sober. There are the ones that see everything as a challenge to conquer. They are unstoppable and will do whatever it takes to succeed, even if they struggle to understand the material. Then there are the ones that set up appointments, then cancel at the last minute. They rush through tutoring sessions because they have friends they're meeting for lunch. They have material to study, but ask if you can "summarize it for them." And when they fail the class, they blame everyone but themselves. Alcoholism isn't just about the initial illness, it's about the behaviors that go along with it. In order to stay sober, you don't just have to stay away from the alcohol, you need to readjust your attitude and take responsibility for your actions in everyday life. This student is an example of doing just that. Kudos to both of them.
I will work with every student to the best of my ability to get that passing grade. My reward is the look on their face when they see they were just as smart as I kept telling them they were. If they apply themselves, I will go leaps and bounds for them. Students will struggle and I don't fault them for that. It just means I have to approach teaching them in a different way. And if they're honest with me about their struggles (private or otherwise), I will go the extra mile for them to help them through it because I've been there. But because I've been there, I don't take lame excuses or blase' attitudes. If I'm going to put in the work, so are you.
Load More Replies..."I started going to AA meetings (I didn’t think I was 'hardcore' enough for AA since I only used marijuana, cocaine, and alcohol). I got a sponsor, and started working the steps." --> What happened during the last couple of decades that cocaine is not 'hardcore' anymore?
How old are these students? I'm the UK, school finishes when you are 15/16, then you go on to sixth-form college if you choose to. My friend is in a coma right now, we believe he became injured on a drugs binge. The ventilator will be switched off imminently and we don't know if he will breathe for himself or not. Addiction is very serious.
Fairly recent changes (think it was from 2015) have made it law that UK students must stay in one form of education or another until 18. Can be 6th form college, apprenticeship or traineeship. I am so, so sorry about your friend. Hoping for the best.
Load More Replies...To respond to one comment: the "aloha" makes me think Honolulu CC or Hawaii CC. As to the student with the funeral excuse, I must admit it's a go-to excuse for many students. That said, my daughter started college and the day after her professor gave a "just how many grandparents can die in a semester" talk about lame excuses, my mother did actually die! I wrote him an email to assure him that she really did have a dead grandparent but that I understood why he gave that talk to his classes.
Thank you to this professor for kindness and generosity. I suspect prof has 100s of students and this helpful spirit is above and beyond!
The equation is simple: 1 day + 0 drugs/booze x time = Better living
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