Entitled Couple Wants Neighbors To Cook For Them And Do Their Housework Because They Are Having A Baby, Get Slammed On Twitter
Interview With Author
Just because you’re a new parent doesn’t mean that you’re not acting entitled. Case in point, Twitter user Jack Jokinen, a podcaster from Philadelphia, shared a story about a very peculiar family from their neighborhood. He got an invitation to join the Nextdoor social network and that’s how he found about a local couple who were having a baby and they weren’t feeling all too confident about being first-time parents. That’s why they reached out to the community for help via the Meal Train ‘giving’ website.
One of the things they asked for was for their neighbors to come over with food. Sounds like a simple request for help from time to time, right? Just drop off an extra lasagna or little bit of pie that you baked and that’s it? Forget about it! The couple was expecting constant high-level catering. All for free! And it simply oozes entitlement.
They had an entire list of specific pre-approved meals (with recipes no less!). Yup, that’s right, dear Pandas, they wanted the friendly locals to make them their favorite meals. And no, they wouldn’t settle for anything else. However… that the request for food was just the tip of the iceberg. Naturally, Jack’s thread was so ‘out there’ that it went viral. Check out his full story about the peculiar couple below.
Bored Panda got in touch with Jack, the author of the thread, who told us all about the peculiar situation. “My initial reaction was to assume it was a couple in need,” he said. “Then, when I saw the demands and telling people that if they don’t cook, they can come clean, I was floored,” he said. Scroll down to read what Jack had to say, including an update about the couple.
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A couple who were expecting their baby were feeling very overwhelmed, so they reached out for help from their neighbors
Image credits: Anastasiia Chepinska (not the actual photo)
However, they asked for help in an incredibly entitled manner, as their neighbor, Jack, detailed in a viral Twitter post
Image credits: JJFromTheBronx
Image credits: JJFromTheBronx
Image credits: JJFromTheBronx
Here’s what the couple’s post on Meal Train, that eventually ended up on Nextdoor, looked like
Image credits: mealtrain
Image credits: JJFromTheBronx
The dad and mom-to-be were very picky about what kind of food they were expecting to get
Image credits: JJFromTheBronx
Not only did they have a list of over 30 pre-approved meals in mind, they also added in the specific recipes for each one
Image credits: JJFromTheBronx
Here are a few ideas that they had for breakfast and for lunch
Image credits: JJFromTheBronx
They also added in a list of their favorite snacks
Image credits: JJFromTheBronx
However, that was just the tip of the iceberg. The parents had some other tasks ready for their neighbors if they didn’t want to donate any food
Image credits: JJFromTheBronx
Image credits: JJFromTheBronx
The cherry on top was the fact that the couple put their convenience above that of their neighbors
Image credits: JJFromTheBronx
They were expecting constant checking in and wanted absolutely everything to be done on their terms
Image credits: JJFromTheBronx
Jack had the right idea when he wrote this particular tweet
Image credits: JJFromTheBronx
So far, there’s been just one neighboring family who was willing to lend a helping hand
Image credits: JJFromTheBronx
Image credits: JJFromTheBronx
Jack, the author of the thread, told Bored Panda that he had no idea that his thread on Twitter would go viral. He said that he “just found it funny.”
He did have a small update for us. “We did later find out that the couple was recording a podcast about having a child where they talked about all the gifts they had been given by neighbors already and that they had the resources to pay someone to paint their house while they lived in a hotel for a few days,” Jack shared.
“I think, overall, they were just out of touch with reality.”
The father-to-be told The New York Post that he was surprised that his post was going viral online. “I apologize if it was taken the wrong way—and I’m frankly just very surprised and a little disheartened by … the response. If they are not interested, then they don’t have to check that site or do anything. This is the world we live in,” he said, adding that he was asking for help from “friends and family.” At least one neighbor reached out and offered their support.
As if all of the couple’s breakfast, lunch, and dinner ideas weren’t enough, they also mentioned their least liked meals.
“Alex really dislikes mashed potatoes. But again, this isn’t necessarily about food. Text me and check in… maybe come visit… vacuum, wash some dishes, walk the dog. That will nourish us as much,” they wrote, inviting their neighbors to do their chores for them.
Twitter user Jack put it very nicely when he wrote, “If I don’t egg their house, I deserve an award.” After all, it’s incredibly difficult to find in yourself the willingness to help someone who asks for help in the most arrogant way possible.
The couple also noted that they “try to avoid sugar” and do their best to eat “whole, simple foods.”
I try not to judge people too much, least of all parents who have it tough anyway, but the couple’s social ineptitude here is just overwhelming. But maybe I’m being too harsh. Maybe they grew up having absolutely everything handed them on a silver plate, so they assume everyone will be rushing to their rescue, no matter what.
What are your thoughts about the couple, Pandas? How would you react if your neighbors had a huge list of demands for you? Would you be willing to help out someone like this? And, most importantly, would you stick to their list of pre-approved recipes or would you bring over something that you were planning to make either way? Let us know what you think in the comments!
Here’s how people reacted to the incredibly peculiar call for help from the family
Image credits: minifanlaur
Image credits: EmilyKaWae
Image credits: MrSteveMusic
Image credits: DannyDeraney
Image credits: remakeyourself
Image credits: Dwest2828
Image credits: cliffyh69
Image credits: bleachacreature
Image credits: paultheoutlaw
Image credits: TheMominatrixx
Have either of those twats ever offered to help their neighbors in any way, or reached out to offer the least little thing to anyone there?
When my first child was born, my wife went through 24 hours of labor before having an emergency c-section (daughter was in an awkward position, and got stuck). They both spent 2 days in the (N)ICU. Finally got them home, and 24 hours later my wife had such abdominal pain that we went back to the hospital. Turns out she had postoperative ileus - basically her digestive system had shut down due to the trauma, and wasn't processing anything that she ate. She was in the hospital for 7 days, while I took care of our newborn, on my own. Our family lives 2000 miles away, and eventually my mother flew down to help out, but I managed to take care of our newborn daughter on my own for a week. These people are wimps.
Being a first time parent isn't supposed to be easy. It's a trial by fire and you learn pretty damn quick how to manage your time and what is most important to you. The new dad needs to step up to the plate and do the cooking and cleaning. If you weren't ready to face the stress of having kids then you shouldn't be having them. Is he going to have the neighbors diaper the baby, dish out discipline when the terrible two's come about, home school the kid? You had it, you deal with it.
Actually, throughout history and across the globe, the community comes together to help new parents. “It takes a village to raise a child” is a proverb for a reason. We now live in a self absorbed individualistic society, and people are having less children, so this tradition has died in some places. What they are asking for is what should be happening organically. The problem is that they are ASKING for it... which ties in to my previous comment of modern society being self absorbed. Another comment below said "if they were humble and just asked for any type of help" the response might have been different.
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That man is right~with all the time they took to write this up, they could have prepped a weeks worth of meals.
I wish people would stop referring to these self-centered, entitled arseholes as "so millennial".
Totally agree. This is a personality issue, not a generational one. Spoiled selfish gits have been a around forever.
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In short: Delusional idiot is looking for even more delusional morons to take advantage of. This proves once more that there's an idiot born every second.
At my church we have "meal trains" (new phrase for me), and we help with chores, however we only bring food for a week or so. I will call an ask if they have food allergies, or if they are really craving something (I love to cook). However if they came to us with a list like this, they would get shut down, politely, and told we are not a restaurant, but we will help meet your basic needs. We take food to those who are sick, recovering from surgery or birth. We typically help with any reasonable chores. FYI over the years my wife and I have served many people, who are not millennials and yet feel this entitled. Can we please stop labeling and stereotyping people?!?
Yeah that comment about “millennial phrasing” was fùcking dumb. Do they just mean “how people talk now”? Because millennials are between 25-40 so of course they pretty much determine standards of speech for this generation.
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My poor darlings, I so feel for you both. Few have been so blessed to become pregnant and give birth to an angel. You must feel very special and privileged. I would be honoured and humbly suggest I cook the following: Salade Nicoise as a starter, then on to Confit de canard and to end it all a Chocolate soufflé. Please let me know when you want me to serve these dishes, I can’t wait for your approval. Kow-towing with forehead on ground, Auntie CaroCaro.
What, no drinks? 😁 Please dress appropriately when you deliver it as well... some kind of maid's uniform I would think.
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I honestly wouldn’t even let strangers cook for me when I‘m pregnant. There are a lot of things pregnant women shouldn‘t eat or should only eat in moderation, and I would not trust (nor expect) strangers to be aware of these limitations.
I was also thinking- I wouldn't know a stranger's "sanitation level" they cook at, like potential cross-contaimination with raw meat. While I would appreciate the good intentions, I would be leery about a total stranger's home food.
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I don't know that it's a generational thing, I think it's symptomatic of entitlement that is evident in all generations lately. I have listed stuff "free" on Craigslist, to get responses asking me if I wouldn't mind driving it 35 miles across town sometime between 1-3 pm. I look at bridezillas with their demands... "if you haven't spent $500 on the gift, don't bother coming, and for god'sake, lose 30 lbs before you do!". One of the earliest gifts my mom gave me was the lesson that ALL gifts, no matter what, are received with gratitude and graciousness. I grew up with little, among folks who had little, and we would never have demanded this kind of thing.
Do you watch Charlotte Dobre? She does videos on entitled people and some of her newer videos are stories of brides asking guests to lose 30 lbs and $500 gifts. It blows my mind people are like that. I've always stood on my own two feet and have gone without even basic things like new socks and underwear for years at a time. My family would laugh me out of town if I asked for $500 gifts when I married.
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Imagine if he had been humble and just asked for any kind of help, they'd probably have a GoFundMe up to $100k by now...and new friends.
How am I not at all surprised that their actual friends and family members don't want to help them out.
When my wife and I had our son, this or anything like this never entered our thoughts. Yes it's tough as hell being a first time parent but seriously, step up and be a parent. None of our family members did this aside from bringing round the occasional essentials (bread, milk butter etc). Not that we wanted them to, it is our journey after all. Also stop avoiding sugar, you will need a lot of it to keep up.
I live in a family neighborhood, lots of kids of various ages. And this is literally what we do. When a new family has a baby the neighbors come together and drop off food for the parents, because we know how hard it is. We don't expect to stop in and visit because we know how tired they will be. We help out in every way we can, because we are a community. *BUT* nobody expects this of anyone, and the new parents don't make any requests.
It sounds like a great way to live. I know if someone in my neighborhood politely told people they were having a baby and a bit overwhelmed and would love it if people gave a little of their time to help out, I would be all over that. This list of super-specific demands though, this is so entitled and egocentric.
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Please, create more work and financial burdens on people you don’t know, because you couldn’t use a rubber.
I have seen the concept of the meal-trains, but people - and let's not make this a generational thing, please - misunderstand. It's meant to be for FRIENDS and FAMILY who WANT and have OFFERED to help, but don't know what's most helpful to you, and it's easy to get overwhelmed in the moment and not know what you need. It is not a list of demands to strangers who haven't even offered to help.
Spend Lee’s time making a podcast about having a baby, something that has been going on forever, and concentrate more on preparing to have a baby. While you’re both able, buy a freezer and make a shitload of freezable meals and snacks ahead of time, so all you have to do for dinner is throw one in the microwave. Hubby can learn to cook, vacuum, dust, and do laundry—-or hire some help if they’re well off enough. The neighborhood is not your parents. They don’t have to be. They’re also not going to raise your kid(s) for you, so time to put on your grownup pants and be real parents. Otherwise, CPS will be knocking on your door.
they don't use that term everywhere but yes same thing
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Ok listen. i think meal trains are a good idea, especially if they help the elderly or chronically ill people! it's a lovely idea. but when two, able bodied people sat on their Macbook Air and asked others to cook for them??? and do CHORES? and then listed RECIPES FOR FOODS THEY WANT! and yes i agree with the comment that said "oh here take my leftover lasagna" and yea, i'd give a neighbor some lasagna leftovers
but they are asking for full meals. it just blows my mind. lmao that's my rant
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I'm just agog at the sheer balls of someone who thinks this would work. Just, wow.
Oh man...this entitled woman I know pulled something like this. Her and her husband make well beyond 6 figures each and actually posted a GoFundMe and one of those calendars where people can order meals to be delivered to them because they had a baby. Entitled twats will always be entitled.
When I was born my parents already had my big sister, my dad would leave to go to National Guard duties, and they both had jobs. They didn't rely on their neighbors to help them out by cooking them meals and checking in on them all the time. They did have help, but the help came from family members and not complete strangers. This kind of entitlement is what's wrong with our society. If you can't manage to take care of a baby without the entire neighborhood helping you then you shouldn't have a baby.
The thing is that the world is different today (for good or bad). (1) Go back a generation or two, and you would have at least one sibling, and dozens of aunts uncles and cousins. Today isn't uncommon at all for parents to both be "only children", and as such have zero immediate family other than their own parents. (who might not live in the same town, or be alive anymore) -- (2) Assuming these are Americans, attendance to a church/synagogue/mosque has dropped substantially over the last generation. Previous generations would have a community at their place of worship that would help. -- (3) fewer people are having children. In the past there would be multiple families already in the neighborhood for these people, and they already would have processes in place for helping each other.
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Breastfeeding and live on “whole, simple foods.” Welcome to a totally unrealistic world.... GET SOME GROUND CONTROL....
Uh... Do they expect the neighbors to buy all the ingredients and stuff? That's kind of a lot, especially because they like organic specifically... Yeesh
What a couple of pansies. Grow up & raise your child . . . That's right, YOU do the rearing, not the baby.
This is what friends & family are for- not random neighbors you have never bothered to get to know until you need something
as a true millennial (32 and on the younger side of that generation), i can say this is not a generation issue, this is an entitlement issue. this could have totally been worded in a more humble and grateful tone. i've had friends ask for gift cards to services like hello fresh and blue apron in lieu of the countless newborn sized clothes everyone buys for showers that the kid will probably outgrow being even getting to wear it. and that's a brilliant idea. it takes less than five minutes to buy, friends don't have to cook and transport it, and it shows up at the new parents' home once a week. i've also had friends who don't have close family living in the same city that have taken the last approx 2 weeks of pregnancy just cooking anything that will freeze and reheat well like it was their mission in life. do what you gotta do to feed yourself first and f**k it if your house gets a bit messy in the first few months.
These selfish assholes are a textbook example of why communism can never work. The same reason why every hippie commune of the ‘60s failed. Some people are givers. Some people are takers.
This kid isn't even due til April and they have already alienated half the neighborhood before the going gets really tough. With the holidays coming up, perhaps they should put together some nice giftbaskets for their neighbors and try again. They seem to be big on organics, try building a relationship that way too.
maybe some of the neighbors who have kids should have an intervention to explain that part of being a new parent is the struggle. and, maybe they should have practiced safe sex until they were ready to be adults.
If they don't have a clue how to budget or cook, then these entitled little brats have no business bringing a whole human baby into the equation. Get a grip!
I think their neighbors need to start looking around, and find people who actually DO need community support and food chains. And demand that Mr. and Mrs. New-Parents join in and cook meals for the bereaved, or those who are flattened by medical issues, or who are aging with inadequate support. Of course the intended lesson will not sink in, but the neighbors will have a bit of fun poking the spoiled twats with sticks, and people who need help will get it.
This really is one of the most entitled things I've ever read. And the fact that the father to be is playing the poor victim just irritated me more. These two should NOT be raising another one of them to be set upon the world. I actually want to slap their parents for raising two of the most useless, entitled brats the planet has ever seen.
I get it. Having a kid is hard. And if they kept it to, "hey if you don't mind walking our dog (with yours if you have one) we'd be very grateful" there's been a lot more people going for walks durning this time so that wouldn't be unreasonable. But to basically ask your neighbors to be rotating cooks and maids?! Grow up lol. Yeah it's not easy, but no one ever said it was. Like omg this is delusional.
Yowl-serrrr! People have babies everyday. Somehow they manage without asking complete strangers for help. Last year we got some new neighbors who were very young and very nice. She was just starting her pregnancy and, of-course, rather obsessed. I learned they had recently moved to our area and knew no one. Their families lived on the other side of the country and were not very supportive (there's a story there). They both became involved in neighborhood projects and helped other neighbors when they could. When the baby arrived prematurely, the entire neighborhood came together to help. We made meals, mowed the lawn and did what we could. They were extremely thankful and later gave a huge party to thank everyone. This is how you do it RIGHT. No demands, no expectations, just being a good neighbor rather than a demanding jerk. This young family now helps others when they need help and have become a valued part of our community. As I said, they did it right.
These assholes....your PREGNANT. Grow the f**k up and do s**t for yourselves. We have all done it without resorting to this b******t !
I'm vegetarian, yet I have a lovely meal option that they didn't suggest. Cooking them for the entire neighborhood ala a tribute. Where's Dexter & Hannibal Lector when you need them?
that choice of words, "special instructions" was what really ticked me off. I just remmebered:"wot an idiot"-hermione
People in my neighborhood do this all the time. I've actually seen ones with significantly more forceful and detailed demands. And so many people step right up. I only do occasionally.
Having a newborn is incredibly hard and I wish we as a society gave new parents more support and resources, but I don't know that I'd ask an entire neighborhood of strangers. Family and friends, absolutely. I can empathize with where they're coming from, but if I were going to do something like this, I would at the least word it very differently.
I hope their skeletons aren't going to be found after all the food they expected to get didn't turn up
I’m thinking a hundred pounds of mashed potatoes- organic of course.
Boy, I wonder how on earth my great grandmother managed with 10 kids to take care of. Ugh!!! I had my 2 back to back and did it all on my own while my husband was at work. It's hard but geez.... no one really knows what they're doing when they have the first kid but you figure it out
The very epitome of the "crass American". This is beyond embarrassing. These people have absolutely no business bringing a child into the world. Can you imagine what kind of self centered, entitled prick that kid is going to be?
And these POS are being allowed to BREED????? They should be spayed and neutered ASAP!!! They should NEVER be allowed to breed! EVER!!!
I looked at all those recipes and wondered why the mother and father-to-be aren't busy cooking and freezing. I also wondered if they have no relationship with any of their neighbors. I have a couple of neighbors who are really close friends and I would do anything for them and they have always been there for me. These guys are just entitled douche-canoes.
Sometimes these can be really helpful....though it is kinda of odd that they would make one for themselves... My grandpa recently passed away... and I'm part of the band up at my school....When the band parents heard about it, they created a meal train and brought us food. It was really helpful for us- My mom was all out of sorts since it was her dad... so she hadn't been cooking or grocery shopping for a few weeks (and the rest of us can't cook squat)... So yeah, I was really grateful they came along and helped :)
At first I didnt think it was too bad but after reading further and them including accepted meals and recipes, I changed my mind. Asking for help is reasonable but this just goes a bit too far.
THE TWIST He's 43 and not a millenial. A 43year-old father to be wrote that post not a young kid of 20.
Yeah, millennials are between 25-40. This guy is Generation X (my generation) which makes him an anomaly. We're known for being able to handle s**t because we basically raised ourselves.
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My hubby and I had no family support when we had our first child. It was bloody difficult. We mainly shifted for ourselves, were grateful for friends who did offer help without being asked and also looked into what support there was from our local authority (Surestart was pretty good when my eldest was a baby) and parenting organisations such as the NCT. These parents seem to want everything handed to them on a plate!!
Maybe I'm overly generous, but I see this as a plea for Traditional American Help without the 500 discarded helpings of Traditional American Helpful Casserole. If you aren't familiar, the dominant ingredient will be cream of mushroom soup, mayonnaise, or brown sugar. Most likely the maker will claim it has healthy vegetables in it; most often they mean sad little canned things. I suspect food-delivery systems benefit enormously from a whole generation that would love to ask for help but fears what we might get if we do.
Maybe I'm overgenerous, but I just read this as "We could use some Traditional American Help but do not want to throw away a hundred Traditional American Casseroles." For those unfamiliar, they are mostly served as vegetable side dishes, occasionally as main courses, and are built with too much mayonnaise, cream of mushroom soup, or brown sugar.
Who cares? They don’t know what they are doing, they asked for help albeit in an awkward and overbearing way. And they need to get shamed on the internet? SMH…
Have either of those twats ever offered to help their neighbors in any way, or reached out to offer the least little thing to anyone there?
When my first child was born, my wife went through 24 hours of labor before having an emergency c-section (daughter was in an awkward position, and got stuck). They both spent 2 days in the (N)ICU. Finally got them home, and 24 hours later my wife had such abdominal pain that we went back to the hospital. Turns out she had postoperative ileus - basically her digestive system had shut down due to the trauma, and wasn't processing anything that she ate. She was in the hospital for 7 days, while I took care of our newborn, on my own. Our family lives 2000 miles away, and eventually my mother flew down to help out, but I managed to take care of our newborn daughter on my own for a week. These people are wimps.
Being a first time parent isn't supposed to be easy. It's a trial by fire and you learn pretty damn quick how to manage your time and what is most important to you. The new dad needs to step up to the plate and do the cooking and cleaning. If you weren't ready to face the stress of having kids then you shouldn't be having them. Is he going to have the neighbors diaper the baby, dish out discipline when the terrible two's come about, home school the kid? You had it, you deal with it.
Actually, throughout history and across the globe, the community comes together to help new parents. “It takes a village to raise a child” is a proverb for a reason. We now live in a self absorbed individualistic society, and people are having less children, so this tradition has died in some places. What they are asking for is what should be happening organically. The problem is that they are ASKING for it... which ties in to my previous comment of modern society being self absorbed. Another comment below said "if they were humble and just asked for any type of help" the response might have been different.
Load More Replies... That man is right~with all the time they took to write this up, they could have prepped a weeks worth of meals.
I wish people would stop referring to these self-centered, entitled arseholes as "so millennial".
Totally agree. This is a personality issue, not a generational one. Spoiled selfish gits have been a around forever.
Load More Replies... In short: Delusional idiot is looking for even more delusional morons to take advantage of. This proves once more that there's an idiot born every second.
At my church we have "meal trains" (new phrase for me), and we help with chores, however we only bring food for a week or so. I will call an ask if they have food allergies, or if they are really craving something (I love to cook). However if they came to us with a list like this, they would get shut down, politely, and told we are not a restaurant, but we will help meet your basic needs. We take food to those who are sick, recovering from surgery or birth. We typically help with any reasonable chores. FYI over the years my wife and I have served many people, who are not millennials and yet feel this entitled. Can we please stop labeling and stereotyping people?!?
Yeah that comment about “millennial phrasing” was fùcking dumb. Do they just mean “how people talk now”? Because millennials are between 25-40 so of course they pretty much determine standards of speech for this generation.
Load More Replies... My poor darlings, I so feel for you both. Few have been so blessed to become pregnant and give birth to an angel. You must feel very special and privileged. I would be honoured and humbly suggest I cook the following: Salade Nicoise as a starter, then on to Confit de canard and to end it all a Chocolate soufflé. Please let me know when you want me to serve these dishes, I can’t wait for your approval. Kow-towing with forehead on ground, Auntie CaroCaro.
What, no drinks? 😁 Please dress appropriately when you deliver it as well... some kind of maid's uniform I would think.
Load More Replies... I honestly wouldn’t even let strangers cook for me when I‘m pregnant. There are a lot of things pregnant women shouldn‘t eat or should only eat in moderation, and I would not trust (nor expect) strangers to be aware of these limitations.
I was also thinking- I wouldn't know a stranger's "sanitation level" they cook at, like potential cross-contaimination with raw meat. While I would appreciate the good intentions, I would be leery about a total stranger's home food.
Load More Replies... I don't know that it's a generational thing, I think it's symptomatic of entitlement that is evident in all generations lately. I have listed stuff "free" on Craigslist, to get responses asking me if I wouldn't mind driving it 35 miles across town sometime between 1-3 pm. I look at bridezillas with their demands... "if you haven't spent $500 on the gift, don't bother coming, and for god'sake, lose 30 lbs before you do!". One of the earliest gifts my mom gave me was the lesson that ALL gifts, no matter what, are received with gratitude and graciousness. I grew up with little, among folks who had little, and we would never have demanded this kind of thing.
Do you watch Charlotte Dobre? She does videos on entitled people and some of her newer videos are stories of brides asking guests to lose 30 lbs and $500 gifts. It blows my mind people are like that. I've always stood on my own two feet and have gone without even basic things like new socks and underwear for years at a time. My family would laugh me out of town if I asked for $500 gifts when I married.
Load More Replies... Imagine if he had been humble and just asked for any kind of help, they'd probably have a GoFundMe up to $100k by now...and new friends.
How am I not at all surprised that their actual friends and family members don't want to help them out.
When my wife and I had our son, this or anything like this never entered our thoughts. Yes it's tough as hell being a first time parent but seriously, step up and be a parent. None of our family members did this aside from bringing round the occasional essentials (bread, milk butter etc). Not that we wanted them to, it is our journey after all. Also stop avoiding sugar, you will need a lot of it to keep up.
I live in a family neighborhood, lots of kids of various ages. And this is literally what we do. When a new family has a baby the neighbors come together and drop off food for the parents, because we know how hard it is. We don't expect to stop in and visit because we know how tired they will be. We help out in every way we can, because we are a community. *BUT* nobody expects this of anyone, and the new parents don't make any requests.
It sounds like a great way to live. I know if someone in my neighborhood politely told people they were having a baby and a bit overwhelmed and would love it if people gave a little of their time to help out, I would be all over that. This list of super-specific demands though, this is so entitled and egocentric.
Load More Replies... Please, create more work and financial burdens on people you don’t know, because you couldn’t use a rubber.
I have seen the concept of the meal-trains, but people - and let's not make this a generational thing, please - misunderstand. It's meant to be for FRIENDS and FAMILY who WANT and have OFFERED to help, but don't know what's most helpful to you, and it's easy to get overwhelmed in the moment and not know what you need. It is not a list of demands to strangers who haven't even offered to help.
Spend Lee’s time making a podcast about having a baby, something that has been going on forever, and concentrate more on preparing to have a baby. While you’re both able, buy a freezer and make a shitload of freezable meals and snacks ahead of time, so all you have to do for dinner is throw one in the microwave. Hubby can learn to cook, vacuum, dust, and do laundry—-or hire some help if they’re well off enough. The neighborhood is not your parents. They don’t have to be. They’re also not going to raise your kid(s) for you, so time to put on your grownup pants and be real parents. Otherwise, CPS will be knocking on your door.
they don't use that term everywhere but yes same thing
Load More Replies... Ok listen. i think meal trains are a good idea, especially if they help the elderly or chronically ill people! it's a lovely idea. but when two, able bodied people sat on their Macbook Air and asked others to cook for them??? and do CHORES? and then listed RECIPES FOR FOODS THEY WANT! and yes i agree with the comment that said "oh here take my leftover lasagna" and yea, i'd give a neighbor some lasagna leftovers
but they are asking for full meals. it just blows my mind. lmao that's my rant
Load More Replies... I'm just agog at the sheer balls of someone who thinks this would work. Just, wow.
Oh man...this entitled woman I know pulled something like this. Her and her husband make well beyond 6 figures each and actually posted a GoFundMe and one of those calendars where people can order meals to be delivered to them because they had a baby. Entitled twats will always be entitled.
When I was born my parents already had my big sister, my dad would leave to go to National Guard duties, and they both had jobs. They didn't rely on their neighbors to help them out by cooking them meals and checking in on them all the time. They did have help, but the help came from family members and not complete strangers. This kind of entitlement is what's wrong with our society. If you can't manage to take care of a baby without the entire neighborhood helping you then you shouldn't have a baby.
The thing is that the world is different today (for good or bad). (1) Go back a generation or two, and you would have at least one sibling, and dozens of aunts uncles and cousins. Today isn't uncommon at all for parents to both be "only children", and as such have zero immediate family other than their own parents. (who might not live in the same town, or be alive anymore) -- (2) Assuming these are Americans, attendance to a church/synagogue/mosque has dropped substantially over the last generation. Previous generations would have a community at their place of worship that would help. -- (3) fewer people are having children. In the past there would be multiple families already in the neighborhood for these people, and they already would have processes in place for helping each other.
Load More Replies... Breastfeeding and live on “whole, simple foods.” Welcome to a totally unrealistic world.... GET SOME GROUND CONTROL....
Uh... Do they expect the neighbors to buy all the ingredients and stuff? That's kind of a lot, especially because they like organic specifically... Yeesh
What a couple of pansies. Grow up & raise your child . . . That's right, YOU do the rearing, not the baby.
This is what friends & family are for- not random neighbors you have never bothered to get to know until you need something
as a true millennial (32 and on the younger side of that generation), i can say this is not a generation issue, this is an entitlement issue. this could have totally been worded in a more humble and grateful tone. i've had friends ask for gift cards to services like hello fresh and blue apron in lieu of the countless newborn sized clothes everyone buys for showers that the kid will probably outgrow being even getting to wear it. and that's a brilliant idea. it takes less than five minutes to buy, friends don't have to cook and transport it, and it shows up at the new parents' home once a week. i've also had friends who don't have close family living in the same city that have taken the last approx 2 weeks of pregnancy just cooking anything that will freeze and reheat well like it was their mission in life. do what you gotta do to feed yourself first and f**k it if your house gets a bit messy in the first few months.
These selfish assholes are a textbook example of why communism can never work. The same reason why every hippie commune of the ‘60s failed. Some people are givers. Some people are takers.
This kid isn't even due til April and they have already alienated half the neighborhood before the going gets really tough. With the holidays coming up, perhaps they should put together some nice giftbaskets for their neighbors and try again. They seem to be big on organics, try building a relationship that way too.
maybe some of the neighbors who have kids should have an intervention to explain that part of being a new parent is the struggle. and, maybe they should have practiced safe sex until they were ready to be adults.
If they don't have a clue how to budget or cook, then these entitled little brats have no business bringing a whole human baby into the equation. Get a grip!
I think their neighbors need to start looking around, and find people who actually DO need community support and food chains. And demand that Mr. and Mrs. New-Parents join in and cook meals for the bereaved, or those who are flattened by medical issues, or who are aging with inadequate support. Of course the intended lesson will not sink in, but the neighbors will have a bit of fun poking the spoiled twats with sticks, and people who need help will get it.
This really is one of the most entitled things I've ever read. And the fact that the father to be is playing the poor victim just irritated me more. These two should NOT be raising another one of them to be set upon the world. I actually want to slap their parents for raising two of the most useless, entitled brats the planet has ever seen.
I get it. Having a kid is hard. And if they kept it to, "hey if you don't mind walking our dog (with yours if you have one) we'd be very grateful" there's been a lot more people going for walks durning this time so that wouldn't be unreasonable. But to basically ask your neighbors to be rotating cooks and maids?! Grow up lol. Yeah it's not easy, but no one ever said it was. Like omg this is delusional.
Yowl-serrrr! People have babies everyday. Somehow they manage without asking complete strangers for help. Last year we got some new neighbors who were very young and very nice. She was just starting her pregnancy and, of-course, rather obsessed. I learned they had recently moved to our area and knew no one. Their families lived on the other side of the country and were not very supportive (there's a story there). They both became involved in neighborhood projects and helped other neighbors when they could. When the baby arrived prematurely, the entire neighborhood came together to help. We made meals, mowed the lawn and did what we could. They were extremely thankful and later gave a huge party to thank everyone. This is how you do it RIGHT. No demands, no expectations, just being a good neighbor rather than a demanding jerk. This young family now helps others when they need help and have become a valued part of our community. As I said, they did it right.
These assholes....your PREGNANT. Grow the f**k up and do s**t for yourselves. We have all done it without resorting to this b******t !
I'm vegetarian, yet I have a lovely meal option that they didn't suggest. Cooking them for the entire neighborhood ala a tribute. Where's Dexter & Hannibal Lector when you need them?
that choice of words, "special instructions" was what really ticked me off. I just remmebered:"wot an idiot"-hermione
People in my neighborhood do this all the time. I've actually seen ones with significantly more forceful and detailed demands. And so many people step right up. I only do occasionally.
Having a newborn is incredibly hard and I wish we as a society gave new parents more support and resources, but I don't know that I'd ask an entire neighborhood of strangers. Family and friends, absolutely. I can empathize with where they're coming from, but if I were going to do something like this, I would at the least word it very differently.
I hope their skeletons aren't going to be found after all the food they expected to get didn't turn up
I’m thinking a hundred pounds of mashed potatoes- organic of course.
Boy, I wonder how on earth my great grandmother managed with 10 kids to take care of. Ugh!!! I had my 2 back to back and did it all on my own while my husband was at work. It's hard but geez.... no one really knows what they're doing when they have the first kid but you figure it out
The very epitome of the "crass American". This is beyond embarrassing. These people have absolutely no business bringing a child into the world. Can you imagine what kind of self centered, entitled prick that kid is going to be?
And these POS are being allowed to BREED????? They should be spayed and neutered ASAP!!! They should NEVER be allowed to breed! EVER!!!
I looked at all those recipes and wondered why the mother and father-to-be aren't busy cooking and freezing. I also wondered if they have no relationship with any of their neighbors. I have a couple of neighbors who are really close friends and I would do anything for them and they have always been there for me. These guys are just entitled douche-canoes.
Sometimes these can be really helpful....though it is kinda of odd that they would make one for themselves... My grandpa recently passed away... and I'm part of the band up at my school....When the band parents heard about it, they created a meal train and brought us food. It was really helpful for us- My mom was all out of sorts since it was her dad... so she hadn't been cooking or grocery shopping for a few weeks (and the rest of us can't cook squat)... So yeah, I was really grateful they came along and helped :)
At first I didnt think it was too bad but after reading further and them including accepted meals and recipes, I changed my mind. Asking for help is reasonable but this just goes a bit too far.
THE TWIST He's 43 and not a millenial. A 43year-old father to be wrote that post not a young kid of 20.
Yeah, millennials are between 25-40. This guy is Generation X (my generation) which makes him an anomaly. We're known for being able to handle s**t because we basically raised ourselves.
Load More Replies... My hubby and I had no family support when we had our first child. It was bloody difficult. We mainly shifted for ourselves, were grateful for friends who did offer help without being asked and also looked into what support there was from our local authority (Surestart was pretty good when my eldest was a baby) and parenting organisations such as the NCT. These parents seem to want everything handed to them on a plate!!
Maybe I'm overly generous, but I see this as a plea for Traditional American Help without the 500 discarded helpings of Traditional American Helpful Casserole. If you aren't familiar, the dominant ingredient will be cream of mushroom soup, mayonnaise, or brown sugar. Most likely the maker will claim it has healthy vegetables in it; most often they mean sad little canned things. I suspect food-delivery systems benefit enormously from a whole generation that would love to ask for help but fears what we might get if we do.
Maybe I'm overgenerous, but I just read this as "We could use some Traditional American Help but do not want to throw away a hundred Traditional American Casseroles." For those unfamiliar, they are mostly served as vegetable side dishes, occasionally as main courses, and are built with too much mayonnaise, cream of mushroom soup, or brown sugar.
Who cares? They don’t know what they are doing, they asked for help albeit in an awkward and overbearing way. And they need to get shamed on the internet? SMH…
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