There's probably not one person in the world who hasn't felt dumb at one point or another in their lives. It's only human to experience mild brain farts from time to time, no matter your IQ, academic achievements, or profession. We're all highly susceptible to blunders, and that's okay!

However, there's no denying that dumb things are funny. There's a reason why Reddit always seems to love threads about the dumbest thing someone has said or done. Dumbest injuries? Viral. Dumbest things kids have said? Viral. So when someone on the r/AskReddit subreddit asked "What's the dumbest thing you've ever heard?" of course there were over 15k people that upvoted the thread and thousands of others participating in it. However, Bored Panda has handpicked you 50 stories that we enjoyed reading the most. Scroll down below to read them all and share in the comment section the dumbest thing you have heard!

More info: Reddit

#1

"If i could find a country that didn't take immigrants in I'd move there..."

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Why?
Community Member
2 months ago

Getting off to a flying stop!

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#2

I drive for Uber on the weekends and one time a girl who was in her late 20’s told me that I was making her uncomfortable. I haven’t said a word the whole trip so I asked how I could make the situation better. She said she didn’t like how i kept “playing with the fidget stick in the middle of my car.” I drive a manual. She then told me that I didn’t need to use that because “her car didn’t have that” and claimed to be a mechanic

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Darwinist
Community Member
2 months ago

It's not your car and therefore is none of your business, "mechanic".

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#3

I was in a college class, and we were talking about agriculture. Me being from a farming town I was explaining how important certain aspects of farming are interesting, and super important. This one student was not budging, and she was refusing whatever I was saying. I asked her why she was so against farming, and she said "I think we should get rid of all of them. We don't need them." I asked her if she liked to eat, and she said we would be fine. We could just get food from the stores. I asked her how she planned on getting that food into the store. She responded with "Well they already make all the food in the store as it is right? Why do we need farms. They're stealing money from our local businesses." So in a nutshell. She thought everything, flowers, fish, chicken, loaf bread, and like everything. Was made in the stores, and that's why we don't need farms.

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Zoe's Mom
Community Member
2 months ago

City girl here; born and raised in San Francisco. I went hiking in Yosemite and a baby bear came walking through a crowd of people wanting to get to the falls for water. I looked at the friends I was with and said, "Let's get out of here; if Mama Bear comes, this is going to be bears McDonalds". A guy in front turned and looked at me and said "You means that's not a full grown bear"! We just left.

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#4

A girls in math class didnt understand fractions. We got down to this because the teacher was explaining smething else pretty simple that she didnt understand. So broke it down and figured out she didnt get fractions. Well, thats a little odd but with a minute of explanation she should get it.
Nope. Teacher asked "what is larger, 1/2 or 1/3?" The girl said 3 is more than 2 so 1/3 is larger.
Teacher drew two circles on the board, divided one in two and the other in three parts. "Which is bigger?" Girl gave the same answer.
Teacher erazed both circles, grabbed two pieces of paper, ripped one in half, one in thirds. Held up a piece of both "Which one is larger?" Girl pointed out the 1/3 piece.
"Forget that there are more piece" and he binned the rest, holding up the initial two pieces again. "Just look at the size. Which one is larger?" Girl pointed out the smaller one again.
Defeated, teacher lowered his arms and walked back to his desk. "Please take no offense in this... but are you familiar with the words and concepts of "smaller and larger"?" He asked, as this class turned more sesamestreety by the second.
The girl said she did. Teacher pointed outside. "See those trees? Which is larger, right or left?" "Left", girl said and she was right. The left tree was about 5 metres taller. "Then which piece of paper is larger?" Holding them up again. Girl pointed out the smaller piece and the teacher walked out of the classroom.

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Kesam
Community Member
2 months ago

Teacher returns with bar of chocolate. "Now, I'm going to share this bar with you. Do you want 1/2 or 1/2000 of it?"

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#5

Reminds me of someone who wrote a negative review of their Spain trip, saying everyone were foreigners and they didn’t speak English

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That Guy
Community Member
2 months ago

That is called stupidity.

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#6

Me: “What weighs more; a pound of bricks or a pound of feathers?”

Coworker: “Bricks!”

It took me about 15 minutes to explain the answer to him, which included me drawing it out on paper and using a kitchen scale with different items for examples. I drank so much that night.

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Why?
Community Member
2 months ago

They also vote!

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#7

When I was getting a new aquarium, I put my fish into plastic bags of water to hold them while I set up the new tank.
My Mother panicked and started punching holes in the bags with a pencil. When I asked her what in the good god she was doing, she came back with:
"I'm putting air holes in the bag so your fish don't suffocate. Come on helljack, use your head!"
Nothing I said could convince her she wasn't the hero of this tale.

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ƒιѕн
Community Member
2 months ago

Like the episode of Family Guy when Peter got Chris a bullfrog and poked holes in its back so it could breathe while it was in the box.

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#8

Had a friend over years ago and we were talking about my plasma TV.

He said that he would never buy a plasma tv because he didn't want to have to replace the plasma when it ran out.

I didn't correct him. I thought it would be best if he didn't buy a plasma tv.

DerpDerpingtonIV Report

Daniel Lewis
Community Member
2 months ago

You don't replace it yourself. YOu take the TV to a hospital and get a plasma transfusion.

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#9

Elderly lady my mom knew refused to ever drink Colombian coffee because she was convinced that they "secretly put cocaine in it".

If that was the case, every store would be sold out of it as soon as they got it in.

Idiot.

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Kenny Kulbiski
Community Member
2 months ago

I'm switching to Colombian. Just in case.

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#10

Someone was convinced that Queen stole the bass line to "Under Pressure" from Vanilla Ice's "Ice Ice Baby". He wasn't even saying it as a joke.

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Dragonfruit'nrollerskates
Community Member
2 months ago

umm i have some news for him

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#11

Someone giving their one month old infant a bottle full of juice and water because her mother said to. Also denying the professional nutritionist that told her that’s bad for a baby. Another baby, under one year old, who’s mom puts soda in a bottle because the baby likes it. I don’t think people realize how actually life threatening it is to give their own children these things. And the fact that they don’t put an ounce of research into what they give their kids, or listen to the professionals telling them what their doing is wrong, just makes me so angry.

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Marcellus the Third
Community Member
2 months ago

They've done the research, read all the FaceBook wisdom about vaccines etc. Real world facts, not book knowlegde!

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#12

I used to work in a grocery store and this elderly woman said, “Twenty-five cents a pound? I can get them 4 pounds for a dollar at Safeway

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Daniel Lewis
Community Member
2 months ago

You can also get six of one or a half dozen of another.

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#13

If you have sex with a pregnant girl you can change the biological dad to you. We went to a prestigious school and he wasnt dumb. Everyone looked at him like an idiot

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Why?
Community Member
2 months ago

Obviously said before Sex for Dummies came out.

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#14

My co worker honestly thinks if we keep throwing our garbage into the ocean that nature will "take care of it" with no negative consequences.

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That Guy
Community Member
2 months ago

Its people like them who are making the ecosystem worse

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#15

Freshman English class... we were reading Lord of the Flies at the same time the movie Alive (about a soccer team's plane crashing in the Andes mountains) came out. Since both were about groups being stranded and the politics/society building that results, we were discussing the movie in class one day. When discussing their resorting to cannibalism as they remained stranded on the mountain, this one girl asked, "Why didn't they just order Domino's or something and have it delivered?"

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Truth Monster
Community Member
2 months ago

The Dominos would be super cold by the time it arrived....lol

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#16

When I did tattoos, I had a guy come into the shop that wanted "Mr. 113" on his wrist. Not really all that out of the ordinary. We get it drawn up, my co worker placed it and she starts to do the tattoo. As soon as she starts, the guy screams in pain and jumps up. "What the hell is in that thing?! Is there a needle in there?! That [crap] hurts!" .... what?! This guy was in his 30s or 40s. How do you not know how tattoos are done?! He said, "I don't know. Just thought it was some permanent ink or something." The guy went outside for almost an hour to smoke and I guess hype himself up. He got the outline done at least, but couldn't take the pain anymore and didn't get it filled. Still can't believe he didn't know tattoos were done with a needle.

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Tabitha L
Community Member
2 months ago

I have several tattoos. None were painful. (Have not done wrist.) Worst part is the itching as it heals.

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#17

Can't you just hold in your period or stop it?

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Foxxy (The Original)
Community Member
2 months ago

I sooooo wish we could without it involving a pregnancy or surgery.

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#18

I had a patient tell me once that smoking can’t cause cancer and it’s all a big hoax... as I took him to his chemo appointment for lung cancer, which was most likely because he smoked 40 a day. (How can anyone afford to do that?)

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Dragonfruit'nrollerskates
Community Member
2 months ago

Being rich and stupid is a hobby now

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#19

My old housemate thought that Down Syndrome was something you could get from vaccines.

She wasn’t anti-vax. She was talking about vaccines and said “I don’t get why parents are afraid to get their kids vaccinated. The chances of catching Down syndrome are really low.”

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Ben Dover
Community Member
2 months ago

Well vaccines obviously don't make you smarter!

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#20

Obama has a "weather machine," and that's why it's so hot outside. Person was dead serious, and worked in DC for the federal government for over 25 years, nearing retirement.

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Truth Monster
Community Member
2 months ago

He totally does, He keeps in in a vault next to his *real* birth certificate from Africa and the cure for COVID. And Cancer.

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#21

15 year old girl was afraid that she may be pregnant because she had unprotected sex, with another girl.

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Truth Monster
Community Member
2 months ago

These days that's not as stupid as it sounds. If that other girl is trans, for instance.

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See Also on Bored Panda
#22

A girl I used to work with was pissed that her boyfriend "only bought me 12 roses! He wouldn't even go all out for a dozen, whatta jerk!"

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Why?
Community Member
2 months ago

He should have splurged on a baker's dozen.

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#23

That politician is already rich. He cannot be a thief.

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Marcellus the Third
Community Member
2 months ago

Yes, that's the basis on which the US elected it president.

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#24

Is African a religion

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That Guy
Community Member
2 months ago

Hmmmmm. Thats a good question. Im Not sure

Paige Garberding
Community Member
1 month ago

You''re joking, right?

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Nevits Yibble
Community Member
2 months ago

I'd rank this right up there with "the country of Africa", which is something I still hear people utter far too often

Nicole Tomme
Community Member
2 months ago

No but Afrikaans IS a language

Fieke Engelen
Community Member
1 month ago

Afrikaans is a language, based on the Dutch language after they settled there. It's called a daughter of the Dutch language.

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Marcellus the Third
Community Member
2 months ago

Religion, or deodorant flavor? Choices choices...

Hugo Raible
Community Member
2 months ago

Jewish can be both a religion and an ethnicity.

Ms.M.
Community Member
2 months ago

True. I had a DNA test done and one of the results said that I was ___% Eastern European Jewish.

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CrunChewy McSandybutt
Community Member
2 months ago

I had an acquaintance say that Buddhism is a branch of Christianity and my head exploded.

Rose the Cook
Community Member
2 months ago

No, it isn't a nationality either.

mph seti
Community Member
2 months ago

Pretty sure donald trump said that once...

Curry on...
Community Member
2 months ago

Almost, but not quite as bad as calling Africa a country.

Sasha Kuleshov
Community Member
2 months ago

Is Mexican a place?

Juan Hernandez
Community Member
2 months ago

yes

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Dragonfruit'nrollerskates
Community Member
2 months ago

No

Brenda Johnson
Community Member
2 months ago

I can speak United States of America.

¯_(ツ)_/¯
Community Member
2 months ago

BIG BRAIN

Dumbo Sanchez
Community Member
2 months ago

no its a country duh

D.Dag
Community Member
2 months ago

No, its a song stupid!

Zoe Stillwell-Taylor
Community Member
2 months ago

WHY ARE PEOPLE SO HECKING STUPID

Viviane
Community Member
2 months ago

No, it's an amphibian. Set foot in Morocco and you'll be turned into a newt.

Gage Franke
Community Member
1 month ago

Here, let me put this to you as gently as possible...NO AFRICAN IS NOT A F**KING RELIGION YOU F**KING MORON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Celtic Pirate Queen
Community Member
1 month ago

Or the idiots that think Africa is a country. Africa is a CONTINENT containing 54 COUNTRIES.

David Lippman
Community Member
1 month ago

Maybe the MOVE guys in Philly back in1985...their leader named himself Africa and said he was God.

Naima Ivansdóttir
Community Member
1 month ago

go ask rachel dolezal...

Wolfblood Fanatic
Community Member
1 month ago

*DEEEEEEEP SIIIIIGGGGHHHHH*

BM85
Community Member
1 month ago

"If you're from Africa, why aren't you black"

Juan Hernandez
Community Member
2 months ago

if it is a religion how do i join because i want in

Soro Doeth
Community Member
2 months ago

No,but african music is!!!!

Sabine Hahn
Community Member
2 months ago

A question usually only uttered in the US. 😊

Darwinist
Community Member
2 months ago

It's more of a culture, a place if you ask me.

TheHolyFatherOfToast
Community Member
2 months ago

My brain seriously said "yes" for about 18.7 seconds. (Maybe a little more. It took me abit to start the timer)

Mathieu Brouwers
Community Member
2 months ago

No, but being Chinese could be seen as a religion. I know people who´s (great)grandparents left China and still see themselves and their children as Chinese.

Shopper East
Community Member
2 months ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Can you ask a question with out a questionmark or a questioning tone, if spoken

Shopper East
Community Member
2 months ago (edited)

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

If "Muslim" can be a race, why not?

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#25

Oxygen doesn’t come from trees, it comes from the air!

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ƒιѕн
Community Member
2 months ago

Well..... I guess technically you can't inhale a tree.

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#26

My younger cousin (boy) in Bangladesh got bitten a monkey, somehow. My uncle (not the cousin’s Dad) genuine was worried that would make him pregnant. Some weird old ancient folk tale. He genuinely believed it, I can’t even with that amount of stupidity.

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Ms.M.
Community Member
2 months ago

Well, I'll be a monkey's uncle...

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#27

I was on a date with a girl and she was talking about how being smart made things difficult for her. She said she felt like a social piranha........

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Truth Monster
Community Member
2 months ago

Social piranhas are what happens to smart people after they become cynics of humanity. Start tearing people apart.

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#28

my mum once asked if they had wind in canada...

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Dragonfruit'nrollerskates
Community Member
2 months ago

Good lord how do you not notice it's so cold

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#29

Recently my relative told me he got a bunch of credit cards and maxed them out, he plans on paying them back with next year tax refund. He then quit his job. Same relative always makes fun of me for having "book smarts" but not "street smarts", but the older I get the more I realize being able to look at my finances, live within my means and squirrel some away is a form of "street smarts" that a lot of people seem to be lacking.

Also pretty much any comment on my local news facebook page. A recent one was about a renovated gas station. One person commented complaining that they spent all that money and took away gas pumps, someone else commented that they actually had added several, the only reason the line was longer was because it was new and everyone was going there to see the improvements. The lady replied back really nastily saying she had a J-O-B and didn't have time to count gas pumps, unlike some other "lowlifes", completely oblivious that she looked like an idiot. The article even mentioned that they added more pumps, but again, she has to work for a living to pay taxes for the welfare bums, she don't got time for reading that either. A simple "oh crap I must have been mistaken" or better yet not commenting at all would have sufficed. This situation is not uncommon at all.

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Troux
Community Member
2 months ago

"I'm too busy and important to respond to you!" - Person wasting time on the internet

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#30

Q: Do you like bon jovi?

A: No, I don't eat italian food.

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That Guy
Community Member
2 months ago (edited)

Lol "Its actually french food"

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Note: this post originally had 50 images. It’s been shortened to the top 30 images based on user votes.