Stranger In Doctor’s Waiting Room Can’t Keep Her Opinion To Herself, Fat-Shames A Famous Model, Gets Shut Down
Well-known American model Tess Holliday is going viral on Instagram for a video that she shared. The 36-year-old LA-based body positivity activist and the founder of ‘Eff Your Beauty Standards’ shared how she shut down a woman criticizing her for her weight while waiting for an appointment at the doctor’s office with a couple of very snappy comebacks.
The video quickly gained popularity, and at the time of writing sits at over 144k views. It also sparked an important discussion about how even some of the most recognizable celebrities can still bear the brunt of body shaming. Scroll down to watch Tess’ full video, dear Pandas. When you’re done, let us know in the comments what you thought of the entire situation and if you would have done anything differently.
Bored Panda reached out to Hollywood-based celebrity expert Mike Sington for a few comments on how stars ought to react to their critics.
“My advice on what to do with haters and critics either online or in person is to always ignore them. Once you respond and engage with them, you’re expending unnecessary energy feeding into the hate. There are exceptions, however. If you feel your response can protect others and defend a larger group, you may feel a response is a responsibility you can’t ignore,” he told us.
According to celebrity expert Mike, the more popular a celebrity is, the more haters they’re going to have. Scroll down for the rest of our interview with him.
More info: Instagram | TikTok | YouTube | Twitter
Model Tell Holliday is known around the world
Image credits: tessholliday
Recently, she shared how she shut down a body-shamer who was waiting at the doctor’s office just like she was
Image credits: tesshollidaytessholliday
You can watch Tess’ viral video in full right over here
View this post on Instagram
Celebrity expert Mike, from LA, told Bored Panda that having haters “comes with the territory of being in the public eye.” In short, the more popular you are, the more critics you will likely have. However, there is also an upside to being well-known.
“On the flip side though, the more popular a celebrity is, the more admirers they’re going to have too, so it’s certainly not all bad,” he said.
Bored Panda also wanted to get Mike’s opinion on why some people like to make fun of stars. “People love to make fun of celebrities in an attempt to get a response. Often, that’s the only reason they’re doing it. Somehow, it validates their existence if they can get a high-profile person to respond to them. If you think about it, it’s kind of sad.”
Image credits: tessholliday
Tess immediately drew her critic’s attention to the fact that she’s doing pretty well as a world-renowned model. In fact, she’s so well-known, she has a whopping 2.5 million fans on Instagram and another half a million on TikTok.
However, the line that made a lot of internet users do a double-take was when the woman criticizing her said, “You know, I just stop eating when I’m not hungry anymore.” Tess came back with: “Bodies are weird.” Then the nurse called her name and that was the end of that interaction.
The model revealed last May that she struggles with anorexia. “People said I was lying. There are people who believe I was saying this to get attention. I’ve had some people say, ‘You’re doing this to stay relevant.’ I laugh because I know it’s untrue, but it’s so indicative of what a large problem this is,” Tess wrote on Today about how people reacted to this piece of news.
“I feel grateful that I’m tough enough to talk about this, but I’ve since taken a lot of steps backwards in my recovery. I’ve regressed. I haven’t eaten today. It’s 11 o’clock and I’ve had two sips of coffee, and I feel sick. This has been extremely hard on my mental and physical health.”
Tess believes that people should be able to eat as much as they want and whatever they want without being criticized. She also embraces the word ‘fat’ and thinks that a woman’s size should not dictate their fashion choices.
This isn’t the first time that Bored Panda has featured model Tess. You’ll find our previous article about her very first modeling photoshoot right here.
Here’s how internet users reacted to the popular model’s Instagram video
So I guess "plus size" is American for 'morbidly obese'
I think people hear the word model and think this is something to aspire to or a mark of beauty. She's a 'model' because there are so many morbidly obese people in the US and they need to sell sh*t to them and those people are not going to buy a shirt or dress from someone who is a lot thinner. She's not just big and it's not just her genes: she has a serious health condition that will probably shorten her life by decades.
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Yeah, people should mind their business, Yeah, nobody should bodyshame anyone because you don't know what this person may be going through... but also yeah, this level of obesity in not healthy and may shorten your life.
Swap "may" for "will" and you'd be correct over all. Let alone all the ongoing ailments like knee pains once you're 30 or so.
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She is living a super unhealthy life and promoting it. Fock that... the Pro-Ana community on the other extreme side is equally wrong.
Amen. Let's give the dishonest BS a rest. This is horrid
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Obesity is an addiction. It should be treated like an addiction. We SHOULD NOT be applauding "body positivity", this s**t will kill you. I am 6'2" and 120kg. I am FAT and OBESE. I am working on it, but do NOT tell me to embrace my fat.
Im working on it, too. But I can say that it's a lot harder when people keep insulting me. It makes me want to say "f**k it, what's the point" and grab a pint of ice cream. I don't need people to tell me I'm beautiful, but I don't need them to tell me I'm gross, either. I didn't ask.
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Yes, people should mind their own business and leave her alone... but she can't make us think she's beautiful when we think she is not. We're going out of our way to accomodate her and other really large people (like when they don't fit into cars, planes, hospital beds etc. ), even if it's just their choice to look like that (It's not up to me to judge or decide that). BUT she's very hungry for limelight and attention so she shouldn't complain if she gets it, she can't force everyone to like her looks. While her positivity could be embraced, I hope she doesn't set an example for children to follow her looks. I would say the same thing about an anorexic woman, by the way.
This article is LITERALLY ONLY ABOUT people minding their business and not making comments to strangers about their bodies and what they "should" do. Not about who's beautiful. Not about planes or hospital beds. How about commenting on the article and not going off on your own tangent about your own hang-ups?
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I cant with Tess Holiay. The whole "eff your beautystandards" is complete bs, bc she lives up to all beautystandards except the one that pertains to size. Hair, skin, nails etc is always on point. Then theres her feeble attempt to get back into the spotlight, by claiming shes a recovering anorexic despite her not living up to ANY of the symptons, that define anorexia. Does she suffer from BED? maybe but shes def not afraid of getting fat, eating food and so forth which 10 minutes on her tiktok or instagram can confirm
Best points so far. “Accept yourself for who you are but make yourself look pretty to conform to what society says is attractive”. Fresh perspective.
Load More Replies... I wouldn’t call people like her plus size models, she’s just very obese. I don’t understand why people praise obesity so much these days. There’s nothing wrong to be slightly overweight, but this is just too much. She shouldn’t be called a model.
She is called a model because she presents clothes for large women - that is her job.
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She was in a doctor's office. She is OBJECTIVELY overweight. She is DEMONSTRABLY unhealthy. Do you all not realize what the NUMBER ONE comorbidity to Covid is? Hell, it's the number one killer in the US. Period. People aren't "shaming" you. They are pointing out your obvious problems. It's not "shaming" if I ask, "Hey, do you have to shoot up here?", and opioids only kill like a third of people as obesity. I'm glad she's able to capitalize on being fat, but we have to stop trying to normalize this.
The whole point of all of this is mind your business. It is not a strangers right nor obligation to "...point out your obvious problems." She didn't ask your opinion. Whatever path she's traveling is her business only. Same with yours. Just because you have an opinion and believe that it's correct or helpful does not give you the right to spew it at strangers.
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Oh! Well, like... you know.. I also though that, it was, well, you know, very hard hard to, like...read... LOLL
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The way she wrote it down, without punctuation, is probably clear only in her head. I only understood that she's one of the most famous plus size models. That's the thing she said to make this "unbelievably brave"? I'm more disturbed by the way of expressing then by what may be the looks, that I don't care about.
Lol, that was my thoughts exactly. I don't care what she does, I just want her to use punctuation.
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Her story doesn't even make sense. She says she was wearing her mask and a hoodie covering her hair but then this person says she has a beautiful afce and lovely hair.
Because of her deliberate lack of punctuation, I wasn't sure what the hell was going on. Just proves that stupid can be (semi) famous.
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For being the "most famous plus size model in the world", I've never heard of her until now.
Nope. It's never okay to comment on another person's body and tell them what they should be doing. Unless you're specifically asked. Never.
What really got me was the body shaper saying that she just stops eating sometimes and that eventually she isn’t hungry. That is terrible. Also the model is obese, not plus size
i think it was out of order to comment on the weight of a stranger as this woman did but being a plus size model is one thing but she is morbidly obese and its dangerous to celebrate that and the other extreme is also not healthy being so skinny celebrating both is not healthy at all and saying plus size makes you think someone who is a bit big or chubby but this is way past plus maybe she has a health condition or maybe she just wants to be big i don't know and i am not judging but saying you're plus size when you are morbidly obese is like an alcoholic saying they are just a social drinker its harmful and calling something else is just stupid
"saying you're plus size when you are morbidly obese is like an alcoholic saying they are just a social drinker its harmful and calling something else is just stupid" - that sentence was severely underappreciated by everyone on here. Hit the nail on the head.
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I don't think anyone should comment on someone's weight. however, i don't think obesity should be promoted either. I really don't mean to be a an a**hole here. But obesity (as in calling it body positive, what the hell?) promotion should come with a warning, like alcohol or tobaco. as it is just if not more dangerous.
I have lupus. I take steroids. I gained weight because of that. I am also lucky enough to have hypothyroidism and depression. My anti-depressants cause weight gain. I don’t lay in bed all day eating snacks, but my diet could be better I do admit. So, where do I fit in with the fat people are bad narrative? Am I allowed to have any positive thoughts about myself, or should I just crawl in a hole and die due to my disgustingness?
Oh I feel you - I have fibromyalgia and depression and the meds are horrid for weight gain, plus you know, being in pain and exhausted aren't a great combo for an active life. I definitely feel miserable about my body, yet in the grand scale if things I know I'm not "fat" - I'm a uk size 12 but being someone who my family always criticised for being too thin it's a huge change for me. Being skinny was like a badge of honour - I was even a size 6/8 after my 4th child - but ill health, meds and lockdowns, crappy mood has left me totally different. I try to be ok with it but I'm just not. And it's damn hard time lose weight with everything working against you. Yet I'm not more unhealthy now just because I'm bigger - I was probably worse back then living off sugar free red bull and small portions. You are very much allowed positive thoughts about yourself! Main thing is to look after you, be kind to yourself and I'll try to be kind to me too, we're doing our best!
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Maybe I could share an opinion if only I could make sense of her rambling post. Grammar and punctuation matter.
Her response "I think I'm doing OK" shows she is absolutely clueless to the s**t storm of medical complications that is coming her why by maintaining her current body composition just because it brings in a good amount of cash at this point in her life. She better save it up for when that reality hits her.
The lady at the doctor's office should have minded her own business, yes, but you are absolutely wrong for advocating this unhealthy body image to people. I've been borderline obese and it's straight up UNHEALTHY and was killing me. I didn't need to be told I was beautiful, I needed a damn treadmill, therapy and friends encouraging me to stop being such a fat fuc*. Because I understand the mentality and emotional state of an obese person who won't get healthy, I never look at these people as beautiful. I look at them with absolute pity because they have deep issues needing to be resolved, and they never will be able to escape the attitude of "being fat is fine, in fact, it's COOL". Telling an unhealthy overweight person they're beautiful is akin to me shoving a lit cigarette in their mouth and yelling "smoke damn you!" at them. It's cheering on their death.
She seems to be more concerned about being famous so f**k that... Some people also call acloholism a disease but addiction is more of a mental problem and calling it a disease is kinda sugar coating it.
Ok. Sorry not sorry. She is obese and not a "model" to anyone. Plus sized models are a size 12-14 not a size xxxxl. I like looking at models wearing nice clothes and I'm a women who a few spare pounds on her. Maybe 10-15. So bring on the clothes that would fit me. But showing a model who is obviously WAY overweight and calling her a plus-sized model is just not right.
Grotesque. A dreadful thing to do to yourself. Then to try and pretend it's somehow beautiful.
The woman should have bit her tongue, but the biggest issue i have with this is article is the phrase "body positive activist". Being overweight is unhealthy; it increases your chances of countless diseases and death. It's part of evolution that unhealthy people are less attractive as a mate since we look for healthy partners to raise healthy offspring, scientifically speaking. Getting back to the phrase though, it's like saying you're a "smoking activist" or a "cancer activist". Neither of these things are healthy and don't make sense. What i do understand however is how incredibly difficult it is to lose weight for a lot of people. It's certainly not as easy as just going to the gym and eating less. My wife gained weight through pregnancy and has struggled for a year and a half killing it at the gym and eating
Most comments here a missing the point. Tess knows that she is overweight and that it is unhealthy. However, it is simply none of that lady's business. Like, at all. This post is not about body weight but about giving unsolicited advice. Even more so - at a doctor's office! What would the lady have said if she had replied "I am not fat, I just have a 60 kg tumour in my belly that needs to be operated!"? You do not go around and force your opinion or advice on other people.
Why do strangers think it's ok to say stuff like that?? Anyway, she has a beautiful face and that hair is to die for!
This post is literally about people minding their own business and not telling people what to do with their life. And yet most of the comments on here are peoples opinions about her life. You just can't walk up to someone and tell them what to do with their body and their life, that's super rude and not okay.
People need to mind their business. Her doctor can have those conversations with her. Not some stranger. Some people are so rude. I have heard complete strangers tell others they need to eat less, or eat more. Usually I hear the eat more comments to you g girls that are naturally very thin. Seriously why is it their business to put other down? Rude jerk faces.
Quite aside from the overwhelming consensus of modern medicine that morbid obesity is unhealthy, this young woman should not have to put up with complete strangers making judgements about her...and to her face. Just be nice, people. It's not difficult.
Don't comment on a person's body. No matter what. You can compliment their haircut, their outfit, some thing they worked hard on or have accomplished, but not their body. You don't need to tell me if my butt is too big, too small or just right. I don't need some creepy old man telling me what a beautiful smile I have. It's just nasty. And rude. And none of your business. Keep your hands, your eyes, and your comments off of other people's bodies.
I am "plus size". Doctor is ignoring just about everything and just wants me to lose weight. My weight was stable until she focused on it. Have gained at least 20 pounds more that I don't need since then. She would have more credibility if she actually listened to me and addressed my symptoms, some of which have nothing to do with my weight but if addressed, might make a difference in my ability to lose some weight instead of gaining more!
I completely oppose to the concept of giving unsolicited advice to a stranger. I have no patience for smug people who say "oh, I just eat less"... well good for you, all of our bodies and brains are different. It is utterly self absorbed to think that what is easy for you would be easy for someone else... even the comments here that say "but she IS obese". Yeah you are right, she is. Yeah you are right it is unhealthy... but so what? Nobody is perfect, I'm sure you have some qualities that are problematic. The only thing is that her problematic qualities are highly visible. Where as other problems can be hidden (lethargic lifestyle, smoking, drinking too much, substance abuse etc.) -- If at any point in her post she said "my weight is healthy", I would shut her down for lying. But she didn't say that, so I have nothing negative to say about her.
I'm not sure how I feel about this. I don't think anyone has the right to be up in anyones personal space criticising them, I mean - she was in the doctors, she could've been there for a condition that made her weight unavoidable, plus, just the good old if you don't have anything nice or productive/necessary to say then keep it to yourself. I'd be lying if I said I didn't judge obesity but it's nothing to do with that person really, it's my own issues as someone with a history of an eating disorder - at 18 I weighed 6stone, I was the polar opposite. I struggle today so much because long term illness and medication has made me "fat" in my own eyes, I am uncomfortable with how I look and really want to slim down again, so much so I've recently fallen back into hardly eating. But I'm working on it. I know I would be desperately unhappy, possibly even suicidal if I were this size and as such it's hard to see why anyone would be ok with it. But like I said, that's my issue, not theirs
Fat shaming anyone let alone a total stranger is nothing short of being a monstrous bully. You are not being helpful and you know it. You are tearing down confidence and self worth to make yourself feel like a superior jerkwad. No other reason. Until I got 50 I had a weight problem, I could not gain weight and unless I gorged myself sick and refrained from being active. If I was sick, sad or depressed I could not swallow food and could drop several lbs in a day. Strangers, classmates, coworkers were entitled to grab my wrist and carry on about how skinny I was, or worse, pick me up with zero consent to test my weight...even as an adult. They would tell me how I need to eat every day and how bad I looked. All that killed whatever appetite I had on those days and we'll into the next. I can almost hear the chanting of skinny bones again. Currently I'm a bit overweight and love not feeling bones on the chair. I don't mind my thighs touching instead of almost a foot of thigh gap.
The model was literally at a doctor's office. The doctor is the appropriate person to make a comment regarding health and weight, not the stranger. The commenting woman should have left it at the compliment. She doesn't know the model's medical history. Some people have a legitimate medical condition that results in weight gain. Let discussions of weight be between the doctor and the patient.
Obesity is an addiction. But y’all don’t get that a person has to live with themselves every second of every day. It’s almost like y’all forgot you’re all human too, and live within your own little minds. Body positivity is suppose to be about size or shape. It’s about accepting what you are today and not letting it ruin another god given day. It’s like telling a person with one leg, they shouldn’t be proud because they didn’t look both ways crossing the road. I’m sure EVERYONE should feel okay to be, without the unwarranted comments of someone else who probably had diabetes or heart murmurs. Not all illnesses related to diet are visible, so keep your comments to yourself. It’s really realllllly realllllllllly that simple. WORRY ABOUT YOURSELF.
She has an eating disorder like she said herself, but weight or looks is not something a complete stranger should comment on in a negative way because its none of their business. It is different though when you are close to someone and have a relationship of trust asking if the person is feeling comfortable in their own skin etc., and, if not, what I as a friend can do to help my friend. But there is no way you could force anyone to loosing weight, the person himself needs to to this out of their own will, while our job is to love that person the way she is. But like I said I think its fine to mention potential struggles within a good friendship, even when it comes to weight. It help a lot when a person feels heard and knows there is a net of healthy support surrounding him.
I'm one of the most famous models in the marketing gimmick/fetish category.
Something people don't realize about obese people is that they are just trying to see the value in themselves when everyone else just sees a fat person, which is evident in these comments. They are still human, they still need love and sex and hopes and dreams and everything everybody else wants. I shouldn't even have to say that. Yes, their problem happens to be visible to the world, but that doesn't mean they can't feel good about who they are and feel beautiful sometimes. It's not always about accepting and loving that you're unhealthy and overweight, it's about accepting and loving yourself when you are unhealthy and overweight. I've been unhealthy due to chronic health problems but it's not visible. Underweight and overweight. I couldn't imagine someone telling me how to live my life when I'm struggling so hard and trying to accept myself. You don't know what's going on in these peoples lives to make this happen. Lots of people have issues, mind your own business.
It's all "love yourself" unless your fat I guess. Everyone agrees with "Bodily autonomy", except if your fat, then we can tell you what to do. Everyone is so hypocritical.
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Yeah, I'm surprised too and we're getting downvoted for saying "mind your own business".
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So I guess "plus size" is American for 'morbidly obese'
I think people hear the word model and think this is something to aspire to or a mark of beauty. She's a 'model' because there are so many morbidly obese people in the US and they need to sell sh*t to them and those people are not going to buy a shirt or dress from someone who is a lot thinner. She's not just big and it's not just her genes: she has a serious health condition that will probably shorten her life by decades.
Load More Replies... Yeah, people should mind their business, Yeah, nobody should bodyshame anyone because you don't know what this person may be going through... but also yeah, this level of obesity in not healthy and may shorten your life.
Swap "may" for "will" and you'd be correct over all. Let alone all the ongoing ailments like knee pains once you're 30 or so.
Load More Replies... She is living a super unhealthy life and promoting it. Fock that... the Pro-Ana community on the other extreme side is equally wrong.
Amen. Let's give the dishonest BS a rest. This is horrid
Load More Replies... Obesity is an addiction. It should be treated like an addiction. We SHOULD NOT be applauding "body positivity", this s**t will kill you. I am 6'2" and 120kg. I am FAT and OBESE. I am working on it, but do NOT tell me to embrace my fat.
Im working on it, too. But I can say that it's a lot harder when people keep insulting me. It makes me want to say "f**k it, what's the point" and grab a pint of ice cream. I don't need people to tell me I'm beautiful, but I don't need them to tell me I'm gross, either. I didn't ask.
Load More Replies... Yes, people should mind their own business and leave her alone... but she can't make us think she's beautiful when we think she is not. We're going out of our way to accomodate her and other really large people (like when they don't fit into cars, planes, hospital beds etc. ), even if it's just their choice to look like that (It's not up to me to judge or decide that). BUT she's very hungry for limelight and attention so she shouldn't complain if she gets it, she can't force everyone to like her looks. While her positivity could be embraced, I hope she doesn't set an example for children to follow her looks. I would say the same thing about an anorexic woman, by the way.
This article is LITERALLY ONLY ABOUT people minding their business and not making comments to strangers about their bodies and what they "should" do. Not about who's beautiful. Not about planes or hospital beds. How about commenting on the article and not going off on your own tangent about your own hang-ups?
Load More Replies... I cant with Tess Holiay. The whole "eff your beautystandards" is complete bs, bc she lives up to all beautystandards except the one that pertains to size. Hair, skin, nails etc is always on point. Then theres her feeble attempt to get back into the spotlight, by claiming shes a recovering anorexic despite her not living up to ANY of the symptons, that define anorexia. Does she suffer from BED? maybe but shes def not afraid of getting fat, eating food and so forth which 10 minutes on her tiktok or instagram can confirm
Best points so far. “Accept yourself for who you are but make yourself look pretty to conform to what society says is attractive”. Fresh perspective.
Load More Replies... I wouldn’t call people like her plus size models, she’s just very obese. I don’t understand why people praise obesity so much these days. There’s nothing wrong to be slightly overweight, but this is just too much. She shouldn’t be called a model.
She is called a model because she presents clothes for large women - that is her job.
Load More Replies... She was in a doctor's office. She is OBJECTIVELY overweight. She is DEMONSTRABLY unhealthy. Do you all not realize what the NUMBER ONE comorbidity to Covid is? Hell, it's the number one killer in the US. Period. People aren't "shaming" you. They are pointing out your obvious problems. It's not "shaming" if I ask, "Hey, do you have to shoot up here?", and opioids only kill like a third of people as obesity. I'm glad she's able to capitalize on being fat, but we have to stop trying to normalize this.
The whole point of all of this is mind your business. It is not a strangers right nor obligation to "...point out your obvious problems." She didn't ask your opinion. Whatever path she's traveling is her business only. Same with yours. Just because you have an opinion and believe that it's correct or helpful does not give you the right to spew it at strangers.
Load More Replies... Oh! Well, like... you know.. I also though that, it was, well, you know, very hard hard to, like...read... LOLL
Load More Replies... The way she wrote it down, without punctuation, is probably clear only in her head. I only understood that she's one of the most famous plus size models. That's the thing she said to make this "unbelievably brave"? I'm more disturbed by the way of expressing then by what may be the looks, that I don't care about.
Lol, that was my thoughts exactly. I don't care what she does, I just want her to use punctuation.
Load More Replies... Her story doesn't even make sense. She says she was wearing her mask and a hoodie covering her hair but then this person says she has a beautiful afce and lovely hair.
Because of her deliberate lack of punctuation, I wasn't sure what the hell was going on. Just proves that stupid can be (semi) famous.
Load More Replies... For being the "most famous plus size model in the world", I've never heard of her until now.
Nope. It's never okay to comment on another person's body and tell them what they should be doing. Unless you're specifically asked. Never.
What really got me was the body shaper saying that she just stops eating sometimes and that eventually she isn’t hungry. That is terrible. Also the model is obese, not plus size
i think it was out of order to comment on the weight of a stranger as this woman did but being a plus size model is one thing but she is morbidly obese and its dangerous to celebrate that and the other extreme is also not healthy being so skinny celebrating both is not healthy at all and saying plus size makes you think someone who is a bit big or chubby but this is way past plus maybe she has a health condition or maybe she just wants to be big i don't know and i am not judging but saying you're plus size when you are morbidly obese is like an alcoholic saying they are just a social drinker its harmful and calling something else is just stupid
"saying you're plus size when you are morbidly obese is like an alcoholic saying they are just a social drinker its harmful and calling something else is just stupid" - that sentence was severely underappreciated by everyone on here. Hit the nail on the head.
Load More Replies... I don't think anyone should comment on someone's weight. however, i don't think obesity should be promoted either. I really don't mean to be a an a**hole here. But obesity (as in calling it body positive, what the hell?) promotion should come with a warning, like alcohol or tobaco. as it is just if not more dangerous.
I have lupus. I take steroids. I gained weight because of that. I am also lucky enough to have hypothyroidism and depression. My anti-depressants cause weight gain. I don’t lay in bed all day eating snacks, but my diet could be better I do admit. So, where do I fit in with the fat people are bad narrative? Am I allowed to have any positive thoughts about myself, or should I just crawl in a hole and die due to my disgustingness?
Oh I feel you - I have fibromyalgia and depression and the meds are horrid for weight gain, plus you know, being in pain and exhausted aren't a great combo for an active life. I definitely feel miserable about my body, yet in the grand scale if things I know I'm not "fat" - I'm a uk size 12 but being someone who my family always criticised for being too thin it's a huge change for me. Being skinny was like a badge of honour - I was even a size 6/8 after my 4th child - but ill health, meds and lockdowns, crappy mood has left me totally different. I try to be ok with it but I'm just not. And it's damn hard time lose weight with everything working against you. Yet I'm not more unhealthy now just because I'm bigger - I was probably worse back then living off sugar free red bull and small portions. You are very much allowed positive thoughts about yourself! Main thing is to look after you, be kind to yourself and I'll try to be kind to me too, we're doing our best!
Load More Replies... Maybe I could share an opinion if only I could make sense of her rambling post. Grammar and punctuation matter.
Her response "I think I'm doing OK" shows she is absolutely clueless to the s**t storm of medical complications that is coming her why by maintaining her current body composition just because it brings in a good amount of cash at this point in her life. She better save it up for when that reality hits her.
The lady at the doctor's office should have minded her own business, yes, but you are absolutely wrong for advocating this unhealthy body image to people. I've been borderline obese and it's straight up UNHEALTHY and was killing me. I didn't need to be told I was beautiful, I needed a damn treadmill, therapy and friends encouraging me to stop being such a fat fuc*. Because I understand the mentality and emotional state of an obese person who won't get healthy, I never look at these people as beautiful. I look at them with absolute pity because they have deep issues needing to be resolved, and they never will be able to escape the attitude of "being fat is fine, in fact, it's COOL". Telling an unhealthy overweight person they're beautiful is akin to me shoving a lit cigarette in their mouth and yelling "smoke damn you!" at them. It's cheering on their death.
She seems to be more concerned about being famous so f**k that... Some people also call acloholism a disease but addiction is more of a mental problem and calling it a disease is kinda sugar coating it.
Ok. Sorry not sorry. She is obese and not a "model" to anyone. Plus sized models are a size 12-14 not a size xxxxl. I like looking at models wearing nice clothes and I'm a women who a few spare pounds on her. Maybe 10-15. So bring on the clothes that would fit me. But showing a model who is obviously WAY overweight and calling her a plus-sized model is just not right.
Grotesque. A dreadful thing to do to yourself. Then to try and pretend it's somehow beautiful.
The woman should have bit her tongue, but the biggest issue i have with this is article is the phrase "body positive activist". Being overweight is unhealthy; it increases your chances of countless diseases and death. It's part of evolution that unhealthy people are less attractive as a mate since we look for healthy partners to raise healthy offspring, scientifically speaking. Getting back to the phrase though, it's like saying you're a "smoking activist" or a "cancer activist". Neither of these things are healthy and don't make sense. What i do understand however is how incredibly difficult it is to lose weight for a lot of people. It's certainly not as easy as just going to the gym and eating less. My wife gained weight through pregnancy and has struggled for a year and a half killing it at the gym and eating
Most comments here a missing the point. Tess knows that she is overweight and that it is unhealthy. However, it is simply none of that lady's business. Like, at all. This post is not about body weight but about giving unsolicited advice. Even more so - at a doctor's office! What would the lady have said if she had replied "I am not fat, I just have a 60 kg tumour in my belly that needs to be operated!"? You do not go around and force your opinion or advice on other people.
Why do strangers think it's ok to say stuff like that?? Anyway, she has a beautiful face and that hair is to die for!
This post is literally about people minding their own business and not telling people what to do with their life. And yet most of the comments on here are peoples opinions about her life. You just can't walk up to someone and tell them what to do with their body and their life, that's super rude and not okay.
People need to mind their business. Her doctor can have those conversations with her. Not some stranger. Some people are so rude. I have heard complete strangers tell others they need to eat less, or eat more. Usually I hear the eat more comments to you g girls that are naturally very thin. Seriously why is it their business to put other down? Rude jerk faces.
Quite aside from the overwhelming consensus of modern medicine that morbid obesity is unhealthy, this young woman should not have to put up with complete strangers making judgements about her...and to her face. Just be nice, people. It's not difficult.
Don't comment on a person's body. No matter what. You can compliment their haircut, their outfit, some thing they worked hard on or have accomplished, but not their body. You don't need to tell me if my butt is too big, too small or just right. I don't need some creepy old man telling me what a beautiful smile I have. It's just nasty. And rude. And none of your business. Keep your hands, your eyes, and your comments off of other people's bodies.
I am "plus size". Doctor is ignoring just about everything and just wants me to lose weight. My weight was stable until she focused on it. Have gained at least 20 pounds more that I don't need since then. She would have more credibility if she actually listened to me and addressed my symptoms, some of which have nothing to do with my weight but if addressed, might make a difference in my ability to lose some weight instead of gaining more!
I completely oppose to the concept of giving unsolicited advice to a stranger. I have no patience for smug people who say "oh, I just eat less"... well good for you, all of our bodies and brains are different. It is utterly self absorbed to think that what is easy for you would be easy for someone else... even the comments here that say "but she IS obese". Yeah you are right, she is. Yeah you are right it is unhealthy... but so what? Nobody is perfect, I'm sure you have some qualities that are problematic. The only thing is that her problematic qualities are highly visible. Where as other problems can be hidden (lethargic lifestyle, smoking, drinking too much, substance abuse etc.) -- If at any point in her post she said "my weight is healthy", I would shut her down for lying. But she didn't say that, so I have nothing negative to say about her.
I'm not sure how I feel about this. I don't think anyone has the right to be up in anyones personal space criticising them, I mean - she was in the doctors, she could've been there for a condition that made her weight unavoidable, plus, just the good old if you don't have anything nice or productive/necessary to say then keep it to yourself. I'd be lying if I said I didn't judge obesity but it's nothing to do with that person really, it's my own issues as someone with a history of an eating disorder - at 18 I weighed 6stone, I was the polar opposite. I struggle today so much because long term illness and medication has made me "fat" in my own eyes, I am uncomfortable with how I look and really want to slim down again, so much so I've recently fallen back into hardly eating. But I'm working on it. I know I would be desperately unhappy, possibly even suicidal if I were this size and as such it's hard to see why anyone would be ok with it. But like I said, that's my issue, not theirs
Fat shaming anyone let alone a total stranger is nothing short of being a monstrous bully. You are not being helpful and you know it. You are tearing down confidence and self worth to make yourself feel like a superior jerkwad. No other reason. Until I got 50 I had a weight problem, I could not gain weight and unless I gorged myself sick and refrained from being active. If I was sick, sad or depressed I could not swallow food and could drop several lbs in a day. Strangers, classmates, coworkers were entitled to grab my wrist and carry on about how skinny I was, or worse, pick me up with zero consent to test my weight...even as an adult. They would tell me how I need to eat every day and how bad I looked. All that killed whatever appetite I had on those days and we'll into the next. I can almost hear the chanting of skinny bones again. Currently I'm a bit overweight and love not feeling bones on the chair. I don't mind my thighs touching instead of almost a foot of thigh gap.
The model was literally at a doctor's office. The doctor is the appropriate person to make a comment regarding health and weight, not the stranger. The commenting woman should have left it at the compliment. She doesn't know the model's medical history. Some people have a legitimate medical condition that results in weight gain. Let discussions of weight be between the doctor and the patient.
Obesity is an addiction. But y’all don’t get that a person has to live with themselves every second of every day. It’s almost like y’all forgot you’re all human too, and live within your own little minds. Body positivity is suppose to be about size or shape. It’s about accepting what you are today and not letting it ruin another god given day. It’s like telling a person with one leg, they shouldn’t be proud because they didn’t look both ways crossing the road. I’m sure EVERYONE should feel okay to be, without the unwarranted comments of someone else who probably had diabetes or heart murmurs. Not all illnesses related to diet are visible, so keep your comments to yourself. It’s really realllllly realllllllllly that simple. WORRY ABOUT YOURSELF.
She has an eating disorder like she said herself, but weight or looks is not something a complete stranger should comment on in a negative way because its none of their business. It is different though when you are close to someone and have a relationship of trust asking if the person is feeling comfortable in their own skin etc., and, if not, what I as a friend can do to help my friend. But there is no way you could force anyone to loosing weight, the person himself needs to to this out of their own will, while our job is to love that person the way she is. But like I said I think its fine to mention potential struggles within a good friendship, even when it comes to weight. It help a lot when a person feels heard and knows there is a net of healthy support surrounding him.
I'm one of the most famous models in the marketing gimmick/fetish category.
Something people don't realize about obese people is that they are just trying to see the value in themselves when everyone else just sees a fat person, which is evident in these comments. They are still human, they still need love and sex and hopes and dreams and everything everybody else wants. I shouldn't even have to say that. Yes, their problem happens to be visible to the world, but that doesn't mean they can't feel good about who they are and feel beautiful sometimes. It's not always about accepting and loving that you're unhealthy and overweight, it's about accepting and loving yourself when you are unhealthy and overweight. I've been unhealthy due to chronic health problems but it's not visible. Underweight and overweight. I couldn't imagine someone telling me how to live my life when I'm struggling so hard and trying to accept myself. You don't know what's going on in these peoples lives to make this happen. Lots of people have issues, mind your own business.
It's all "love yourself" unless your fat I guess. Everyone agrees with "Bodily autonomy", except if your fat, then we can tell you what to do. Everyone is so hypocritical.
Load More Replies... Yeah, I'm surprised too and we're getting downvoted for saying "mind your own business".
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