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It's no secret that every person has their own skeletons in the closet, gloomy or not, secrets that are better not known to others. Sometimes these are just some small facts that, according to people, can cast a shadow on them in the eyes of others.

On the other hand, we are all human and we all make mistakes. And just like that, we want to look better than we are. Especially in such an important and responsible business as cooking. Who among us hasn't done little dirty tricks in the kitchen while no one is watching? Who hasn't passed off store-bought sauces as an old family recipe?

Some time ago, the AskReddit community faced one simple question: "What's your dirty kitchen secret?" The Original Poster herself was the first to admit - once she dumped out a whole bottle of her husband's nice balsamic vinegar, deciding that it was old clutter, and then "honestly" joined her husband in looking for it all over the kitchen. The thread became very popular, with about 5.4K upvotes and nearly 2.7K comments.

Bored Panda collected for you a selection of the most original kitchen confessions from various people. Some of them are real masterpieces, and some can turn into very useful advice for any home cook. By the way, if you need any culinary ideas - here's another one of our posts about "secret" ingredients when cooking, but for now, feel free to write your comments and maybe show something dark that is hiding in the back corner of your soul... and your kitchen as well.

#1

35 People Reveal Their Dirtiest Kitchen Secrets That Should Probably Stay A Secret When I cook for other people, I’ll sterilize everything and buy most ingredients day of.

When I cook for myself, I’ll pick things up off of the floor and use any ingredient that passes the smell test.

TheMeanGirl , Rene Schwietzke Follow Report

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Kusotare
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When I cook from myself, I frequently eat from the pot, over the kitchen sink.

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#2

35 People Reveal Their Dirtiest Kitchen Secrets That Should Probably Stay A Secret As my family grows up and their various tastes/trends change I find it virtually impossible to please everyone or really anyone so I've basically lost my entire passion for cooking which used to be huge and now it's a freaking chore and they've choked one of my remaining pleasures right out of my life. I resent every bite that I cook. I've lost my mojo

sal139 , Scott Feldstein Report

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Crazy Dog Lady
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I feel this deep. Sick of family members roll their eyes or say "I'm not going to like that". Maybe cook yourself?

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#3

35 People Reveal Their Dirtiest Kitchen Secrets That Should Probably Stay A Secret I ordered 250$ worth of Belgium chocolate online and after it arrived, I hid the box from my kids.

bad_russian_girl , terrykimura Report

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Zophra
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Common scenario in our house. But then I forget what unique place I hide it. Sometimes, the kids are nice enough to remind me - which means my clandestine acts are useless.

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#4

35 People Reveal Their Dirtiest Kitchen Secrets That Should Probably Stay A Secret My popular spinach dip recipe is just a specific store-brand deli item that I add things to (like sour cream, seasoning, etc).

Why don't I make it myself? No idea, this just seems easier.

Why don't I tell anyone? The pleasure of knowing I'm full of lies.

Jemma6 Report

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Sa Ruuu
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Same, everyone praises my mom's spinach dip recipe but it's just the recipe on the back of the seasoning packet

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#5

35 People Reveal Their Dirtiest Kitchen Secrets That Should Probably Stay A Secret On grilled cheese sandwich night:

Wife's grandma: Make the tomato soup with water, not milk!

Me: *Makes it with milk*

Wife's Grandma: This is how I like it. I hate it with milk.

Tralan , stu_spivack Report

#6

35 People Reveal Their Dirtiest Kitchen Secrets That Should Probably Stay A Secret I was inspired by Caramel week on the Great British Bake Off and made a batch of caramel sauce. It was so good I did shots with it until I drank half the batch.

MinervaZee , Amy Stephenson Report

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AllZall
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm guilty in similar occasion. Had chocolate sauce as topping for ice cream. Took a sip every once in a while. Shame on me

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#7

35 People Reveal Their Dirtiest Kitchen Secrets That Should Probably Stay A Secret Had a friend ask me to bring deviled eggs to a party but use non-fat yogurt instead of mayo because they hate mayo.

I used mayo and didn't tell them. They loved the deviled eggs.

girardinl , Alabama Extension Report

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NsG
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Were it not for the fact that they were devilled *eggs* I'd boo this because of the dangers of swapping mayo for yoghurt for someone with egg allergies (says "hate" means "dare not eat". But this was just a fussy eater, so I don't care as much.

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#8

35 People Reveal Their Dirtiest Kitchen Secrets That Should Probably Stay A Secret I took up sourdough baking and serious home chef cooking prior the pandemic. I was home during throat cancer treatment (I'm fine now!) so I had time on my hands and my sleep schedule was wonky and I found that there was always something on Food Network to watch.

But the radiation killed my taste buds and I can't swallow food.

I've baked hundreds of sourdough loaves, countless baked goods, hundreds of meals from simple to complex.

Haven't. tasted. a. single. bite.

People rave over my new found skills.

Lol.

Displaced_in_Space , Andy / Andrew Fogg Report

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#9

35 People Reveal Their Dirtiest Kitchen Secrets That Should Probably Stay A Secret I use jarred tomato sauce.

Ain't nobody got time to f**k with a bunch of tomatoes.

anon , Martin Cathrae Report

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William Tinsley
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Homemade marinara/pomodoro isn't difficult but it's definitely time consuming and honestly you can take the ragu garlic or garden vegetable and jazz it up with fresh garlic onions peppers and mushrooms and make it amazing. Also if you want a bolognese take a hot and a sweet Italian sausage and like half a pound of 80/20 ground beef (the lean stuff isn't greasy enough) and mix it with the aforementioned concoction and it's phenominal

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#10

35 People Reveal Their Dirtiest Kitchen Secrets That Should Probably Stay A Secret I throw away my bones and used store bought broth or Better than Bouillon.

Blarfendoofer , Better Than Bouillon Report

#11

35 People Reveal Their Dirtiest Kitchen Secrets That Should Probably Stay A Secret The snickerdoodle cookies that everyone loves and asks for every Christmas are just Pillsbury slice and bake sugar cookies. I roll em in a ball, coat them in cinnamon and sugar and call it a day.

Unchanging_window , star athena Report

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BluEyedSeoulite
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I make these from scratch, I'd do Pillsbury if I could too. Side note: those cookies need less butter and more baking soda/powder. And less time in the oven

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#12

35 People Reveal Their Dirtiest Kitchen Secrets That Should Probably Stay A Secret Sometimes I just wipe out my non-stick pan with paper towel and put it back in the cupboard rather than washing it.

beanofreen , Alpha Report

#13

35 People Reveal Their Dirtiest Kitchen Secrets That Should Probably Stay A Secret Nutmeg. My wife thinks she hates it. I put it in certain recipes to send them over the edge. She likes to cook, too, and hasn't been able to replicate those particular recipes, which she loves . It doesn't take much to enhance the nuttiness, or compliment the sweetness, or add a layer to the spiciness of certain dishes. For starters, try it in your quiche - nutmeg plays so well with gruyere and Swiss cheese!

bshef , Quinn Dombrowski Report

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#14

35 People Reveal Their Dirtiest Kitchen Secrets That Should Probably Stay A Secret My Asian wing sauce is equal parts sambal Olek and honey. Cut it with soy sauce.

I told everyone that it’s “a process”

It’s literally the easiest thing I make.

usernamesarehard1979 , Daniel Hanson Report

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Remi (He/Him)
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My wing sauce is: ketchup, sugar & honey, vinegar, hot sauce, pineapple juice, garlic, ginger, smoked pepper and a mix of flour and water for thickening. But I don't like wings so it's my everything chicken sauce (The recipe is from Washington DC)

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#15

35 People Reveal Their Dirtiest Kitchen Secrets That Should Probably Stay A Secret I eat a fancy lunch at the fancy grocery store when I go shopping there. I purposely go solo so I don’t have to share my luxe meal with anyone.

janbrunt , Denise Krebs Report

#16

35 People Reveal Their Dirtiest Kitchen Secrets That Should Probably Stay A Secret On most days I just resort to using Jarlic instead of fresh garlic.

palmacosta1 , Aaron Goodwin Report

#17

35 People Reveal Their Dirtiest Kitchen Secrets That Should Probably Stay A Secret This is a long one, the long con if you will.

Last year my girlfriend and I hosted Thanksgiving. Her family being from the Maritimes insisted that the stuffing be homemade, since their stuffing was always homemade. We reluctantly agreed.

We used Stovetop stuffing (the boxed stuff) and come dinner time, we got compliments, naturally. Her sister said "this tastes like stovetop" ... pause... "thank you!" I replied.

Her mother passed away a few months ago, and while we were saying our private goodbyes to her, while she was in a medically induced coma, we admitted that the stuffing was in fact the boxed stuff.

Nobody knows but her, and I love it.

Crocubots , lilszeto Report

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LH25
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I like the Stovetop stuffing, but to me it wouldn't pass for homemade. Both good, just different.

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#18

35 People Reveal Their Dirtiest Kitchen Secrets That Should Probably Stay A Secret No one knows I use Knorr Beef Stock Pot in many of my sauces and stews.

Those pots are literally flavor bombs

RandomAsianGuy , knorr Report

#19

I'm classically trained, worked in the industry for... S**t since 1994, when I was 15 folding boxes in a pizza place. I've cooked every kind of cuisine imaginable, I've worked in places with michelin stars... And my all time favorite food is microwaved banquet salsbury steak. I'll buy and f**k up a [family size container of them at least once a month. I'm addicted.

iamaneviltaco Report

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William Tinsley
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I've been in the industry off and on both front and back of house at a variety of levels of cuisine (no Michelin stars but I've cooked at places with four dollar signs on yelp and I'm totally hooked on taco bell and pizza rolls....

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#20

I hide the jam from my husband. He's British and eats it by the spoonful every day, so I had to take measures

StonyOwl Report

#21

35 People Reveal Their Dirtiest Kitchen Secrets That Should Probably Stay A Secret I only wash my vegetables/fruit if someone else is watching me cook (of if they’re visibly dirty obviously). I just can’t be arsed and I figured if pesticides/production contamination are what kills me, I was meant to eat fast and die young

Zowiezrr , Maciej Lewandowski Report

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Artemis302
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

While in a grocery store I watched someone sneeze (big open mouth sneeze) all over a fresh fruit display. You bet I wash my produce! What happened in the field isn't the only thing in our fruit and veggie's history!

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#22

My closely guarded family secret brisket recipe:
Brisket

Sliced onions

Heinz chili sauce (the whole bottle)

Lipton onion soup mix (must be the powder, must be Lipton)

12-16oz of the soda of your choosing. Mom does root beer, I do Dr Pepper.

Throw everything in the crockpot for at least 6 hours on low.

Also works for pork shoulder (for that I like ginger ale).

PersephoneInSpring Report

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Anna
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Sorry...but for me briskets has to be on the smoker, in a slow cooker it just tastes like pot roast.

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#23

i use Better than Bouillon 'roast chicken' flavor base/bouillon in every soup i make, or anything that calls for broth/stock. sometimes i also add a little BTB mushroom base too, for even more umami. it tastes amazing, lasts forever, and saves time/space/waste. sometimes on special occasions i'll make stock from scratch, or i'll make specific stocks from scratch as a recipe calls for it (shrimp stock is easy/fast enough to make, and if i make pho or ramen i definitely go from scratch. but that's a rare project). but 9 times out of 10 i'm more than happy to use BTB, i think it tastes great.

emergencybarnacle Report

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Adam Belaire
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Just to add a bit, if you ever make rice or a chicken pasta, add BTB in the water first. We started making it with chicken broth in the box and it was amazing. Then we switched to BTB to save packaging/waste/money. So worth it.

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#24

35 People Reveal Their Dirtiest Kitchen Secrets That Should Probably Stay A Secret For the holidays I make cranberry sugar cookies for my grandma (her recipe), last year I completely forgot to mix the cranberry into the dough and she didn't notice. She blamed her lack of taste for the holiday weather and I let her, she kept lamenting on how she knows I'm so good at cooking and yada yada. Oh well, try again to remember to mix it in this year!

Also throw out stuff from my parents pantry that's old or that they'll never eat (looking at you canned creamed spinach) but I move boxes and cans forward to it looks like their shelves are full so they won't buy more stuff.

lilmidjumper , Phoebe Report

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NicNor5560
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My mother passed away a few months ago and I'm the one who got most of the food from her pantry. My goodness, I threw so much stuff away it's incredible. Most of it was expired - like expired since 2012 or something. My brothers could have checked those out instead of packing everything and get me to lease a minivan to move my mother's stuff over at my house 6 hours away. Oh well. I would still probably needed the minivan without the food.

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#25

35 People Reveal Their Dirtiest Kitchen Secrets That Should Probably Stay A Secret I chop storebought creamy caesar dressing in with the meat when I make a Philly cheesesteak. No one has ever guessed it, and everyone is blown away at how awesome they taste.

occidental_oriental , Creative Tools Report

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Bunzilla
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Hey, if it works, it works. Just because it's a store-bought ingredient, that doesn't make it bad. The important thing is really; does it taste good?

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#26

35 People Reveal Their Dirtiest Kitchen Secrets That Should Probably Stay A Secret I worked at a restaurant where a kid made balsamic reduction out of the 3L of 25 year old balsamic.

To this day he’s known as “Money Bals”. That was 2012 😬

Bullshit_Conduit , CCFoodTravel.com Report

#27

35 People Reveal Their Dirtiest Kitchen Secrets That Should Probably Stay A Secret MSG seasoning on pretty much all things

Blimmmer , spice supreme Report

#28

35 People Reveal Their Dirtiest Kitchen Secrets That Should Probably Stay A Secret As a mexican, Doña María mole with a couple of large tomatoes cooked in chicken broth, blended with extra mexican chocolate and peanut butter for a "homemade" classic, lol. Thanks to my ex sis in law for the "family recipe".

aaalma_viajeraaaa , ANDR3W A Report

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Momma Panda
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I am intrigued by this meal. Tomatoes I love, broth is tasty, peanut butter also, and my favorite is chocolate.. but the combo of all.. hmm

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#29

35 People Reveal Their Dirtiest Kitchen Secrets That Should Probably Stay A Secret I drank more wine than usual a few weeks ago and ate half a bag of Cheetos (family size) for dinner.

No-Avocado-1768 , Jason Dean Report

#30

The secret ingredient to my famous from scratch mac and cheese is Velveeta. I have done it with real cheddar, gouda, swiss you name never as good as when there is a little Velveeta.

Any-Photojournalist2 Report

#31

35 People Reveal Their Dirtiest Kitchen Secrets That Should Probably Stay A Secret All my friends and family think I'm a great cook.
They tell me that all the time.

My dirty secret: I have very under-developed taste buds.
I'm only good at shape & texture of foods.

kikimaru024 , Joshua Rappeneker Report

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Kusotare
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I once heard a similar story was the secret to Ben and Jerry's early success. One of them (I don't remember if it was Ben or Jerry) was developing the recipe for ice cream, and kept adding vanilla because it didn't taste much like vanilla. It turned out that he had a problem tasting it (again, I don't recall if it was a permanent condition or temporary), so by the time he could taste it, he'd added several times the typical quantity of vanilla. And that's why B&J's vanilla ice cream tastes so good.

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#32

35 People Reveal Their Dirtiest Kitchen Secrets That Should Probably Stay A Secret My sister always insists only one specific pepper blend is any good to her. I replaced the pepper in her grinder with grocery store pepper. It still tastes good to her.

LallybrochSassenach , Dave Lundy Report

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AllZall
Community Member
1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

A sister of a friend only drank Volvic Water, an expensive brand. Their mother always filled the water up with tap water and acted like someone else already took a bit off it, so she wouldn't wonder about the seal being broken. She took six months to figure it out, though she's a smart person

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#33

35 People Reveal Their Dirtiest Kitchen Secrets That Should Probably Stay A Secret I use these bullion cubes that aren't the super hard rocks, and before I drop them in l like to pinch off a corner and eat it.

LaLucertola , Andrew Gustar Report

#34

35 People Reveal Their Dirtiest Kitchen Secrets That Should Probably Stay A Secret I make tomato sauce for shakshuka “from scratch“ by adding tomato purée to diced tomatoes from a can. The tomatoes where I live suck and the stuff from the can is at least consistent with regard to flavour / acidity profile. Everyone loves me for “homemade” shakshuka ;)

thriftyalbino , Andrew Bowden Report

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Remi (He/Him)
Community Member
1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

this is what I'm always saying. Don't use "fresh" if it's old and shipped in. Freezing and canning and preserving is the better option. so is using them when they're made by others

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#35

My lemon bars I make for my family/coworkers every July 4 is just from the Pillsbury website.

The recipe literally ended up in a cookbook thing we did at work like it was something special I made up

AskMeAboutMy___ Report

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Kaos
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Give yourself more credit, not everyone can follow a recipe well enough to make it exceptionally well.

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