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Mom Refuses To Attend Best Friend’s “Childfree” Wedding
Worried woman touching temples, reflecting tension and conflict about bride banning BFF from bringing baby to wedding.

Mom Refuses To Attend Best Friend’s “Childfree” Wedding

Interview With Expert

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Weddings are meant to bring people together, but sometimes they reveal not just who’s in; they also show who’s out.

Reddit user Then-Dragonfruit-702 recently shared a story about her best friend‘s destination wedding. Originally child-free, the bride later decided to accept a few babies—but only under strict conditions, which she herself set for every guest individually. When the Redditor learned her baby wasn’t welcome, she tried to reason with her friend, as it was really difficult for her to make arrangements that would allow her to leave the little one behind.

However, their bond turned out to be nowhere near as important as the ceremony.

RELATED:

    A couple should be able to be in charge of their wedding

    Young boy in a bow tie reaching out as bride and groom smile during an outdoor wedding ceremony.

    Image credits: Rawpixel / envato (not the actual photo)

    But is it worth sacrificing lifelong friendships over it?

    Bride risks friendship by banning BFF from bringing baby to wedding while allowing others to bring children to the event

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    Text discussing bride risking friendship after banning BFF from bringing baby to wedding while others allowed due to childcare.

    Text discussing a bride banning BFF from bringing her baby to a wedding while others are allowed due to caregiving concerns.

    Worried young woman sitting indoors, reflecting on bride risks and friendship issues involving baby at a wedding event.

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    Image credits: drazenphoto / envato (not the actual photo)

    Text excerpt discussing a bride risking friendship after banning BFF from bringing baby to wedding while others can.

    Bride risks her friendship after banning BFF from bringing baby to wedding while others are allowed to bring their children.

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    Bride risks her friendship after banning BFF from bringing her baby to wedding while others can attend with babies.

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    Bride risks friendship over banning BFF's baby from wedding while others are allowed to bring their children.

    Image credits: Then-Dragonfruit-702

    Vicki Psarias-Broadbent, author of the new children’s book Greek Myths, Folktales & Legends, thinks both child-free and child-full weddings can be fun, but they have to be fair

    Honest Mum Vicki Psarias Broadbent holding Greek Myths book, related to bride risks friendship over banning BFF’s baby.

    Image credits: Honest Mum

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    We contacted Bored Panda’s parenting expert and bestselling author Vicki Psarias-Broadbent, who is raising a teen, a tween, and a 3-year-old, and she believes “it’s acceptable to have a child-free wedding, but I do feel you need to stick to it; having allowances for some to bring babies and not others will end up disgruntling guests and causing issues.”

    Psarias-Broadbent, who runs the critically acclaimed family blog Honest Mum and has just released a beautiful new book for a younger audience consisting of 20 Greek myths, says one common rule at weddings is called ‘babes in arms,’ and couples can explain on the invite (and/or other forms of communication) that, for example, children under 16 are not invited, but babies in arms are.

    “Emotions run high at weddings, so limiting stress and confusion where possible will help everyone,” she says.

    According to Psarias-Broadbent, if the parents need to leave for a multi-day event, it can be tricky to leave the baby with someone overnight, especially if the mother is breastfeeding.

    “Worries aside, it can also be expensive. I think the bride and groom need to establish what’s important to them on their wedding day, and if potentially missing certain guests on the big day is not a worry, then enforce strict rules,” Psarias-Broadbent says.

    “I feel it’s ideal to be a little flexible so you are reasonable without compromising on the day and your goals and vision as the hosts.”

    As her story went viral, the woman joined the discussion in the comment section

    Forum discussion about bride risking friendship by banning BFF from bringing baby to wedding while others can bring kids.

    Bride risks friendship by banning BFF from bringing baby to a wedding while allowing others to bring children.

    Screenshot of a Reddit conversation discussing bride risking friendship after banning BFF from bringing baby to wedding.

    Text conversation about wedding travel logistics in Europe, highlighting a bride risking her friendship over baby ban at wedding.

    Screenshot of an online discussion about a bride banning her BFF from bringing her baby to a wedding.

    Reddit conversation about bride risking friendship after banning BFF from bringing baby to wedding while others can.

    And she received a lot of different reactions, including some suggestions

    Text conversation discussing bride risking her friendship after banning BFF from bringing her baby to wedding while others can.

    Bride risks friendship by banning BFF from bringing her baby to wedding while others are allowed to bring children.

    Comment on a forum discussing a bride risking her friendship after banning her BFF from bringing her baby to a wedding.

    Screenshot of a Reddit comment expressing frustration over a bride risking friendship by banning BFF's baby at wedding.

    Comment advising a bride on friendship risks after banning her BFF from bringing her baby to a wedding.

    Comment discussing childfree weddings and destination weddings as ways to exclude guests and cause upset.

    Bride risks friendship by banning BFF from bringing her baby to wedding while others are allowed to bring kids.

    Bride risks friendship by banning BFF’s baby at wedding while allowing others to bring children, sparking debate on fairness.

    Comment about bride risking friendship after banning BFF from bringing baby to wedding while others allowed baby presence

    Comment on a wedding guest ban causing tension as bride risks friendship by banning BFF’s baby while others bring theirs.

    Online comment expressing that the bride risks her friendship after banning BFF from bringing her baby to a wedding.

    Screenshot of an online discussion about a bride risking her friendship by banning BFF from bringing her baby to a wedding.

    Bride risks friendship by banning BFF’s baby from wedding while allowing others with children to attend.

    Screenshot of a Reddit comment discussing challenges of having a child-free wedding and guest obligations.

    Reddit user shares views on child-free wedding invites and the impact on friendships after banning BFF’s baby at a wedding.

    Screenshot of an online comment questioning the status of a friendship after a bride banned her BFF from bringing her baby to a wedding.

    Text comment discussing in-laws not allowing a child at a wedding and suggesting alternatives, about bride banning BFF’s baby.

    Reddit comment discussing a bride risking her friendship after banning BFF from bringing her baby to a wedding.

    Comment discussing bride risking friendship by banning BFF from bringing baby to wedding while others are allowed.

    Text message discussing bride risking friendship by banning BFF from bringing her baby to a wedding while others can.

    Screenshot of an online comment discussing bride risking friendship over banning BFF from bringing baby to wedding.

    Comment discussing bride risking friendship by banning BFF's baby from wedding while allowing others to bring babies.

    Bride risks friendship by banning BFF from bringing baby to wedding while allowing others to bring children.

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    Rokas Laurinavičius

    Rokas Laurinavičius

    Writer, Senior Writer

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    Rokas is a writer at Bored Panda with a BA in Communication. After working for a sculptor, he fell in love with visual storytelling and enjoys covering everything from TV shows (any Sopranos fans out there?) to photography. Throughout his years in Bored Panda, over 300 million people have read the posts he's written, which is probably more than he could count to.

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    Rokas Laurinavičius

    Rokas Laurinavičius

    Writer, Senior Writer

    Rokas is a writer at Bored Panda with a BA in Communication. After working for a sculptor, he fell in love with visual storytelling and enjoys covering everything from TV shows (any Sopranos fans out there?) to photography. Throughout his years in Bored Panda, over 300 million people have read the posts he's written, which is probably more than he could count to.

    Gabija Palšytė

    Gabija Palšytė

    Author, BoredPanda staff

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    Gabija is a photo editor at Bored Panda. Before joining the team, she achieved a Professional Bachelor degree in Photography and has been working as a freelance photographer since. She also has a special place in her heart for film photography, movies and nature.

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    Gabija Palšytė

    Gabija Palšytė

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    Gabija is a photo editor at Bored Panda. Before joining the team, she achieved a Professional Bachelor degree in Photography and has been working as a freelance photographer since. She also has a special place in her heart for film photography, movies and nature.

    Jonas Žvilius

    Jonas Žvilius

    Author, BoredPanda staff

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    In my spare time, I enjoy creating art - both in traditional and digital form, mainly in the form of painting and animation. Other interests include gaming and music. Favorite bands include Swans, The Strokes, The Beatles.

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    Jonas Žvilius

    Jonas Žvilius

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    In my spare time, I enjoy creating art - both in traditional and digital form, mainly in the form of painting and animation. Other interests include gaming and music. Favorite bands include Swans, The Strokes, The Beatles.

    What do you think ?
    Zelda McLink
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you have a destination wedding, you have to accept that a lot of people won't be able to make it, no matter how much they love you. If it's a choice between rent and someone else's wedding, your rent always gonna win.

    Rafael
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The person holding the friendship hostage over a party isn't a friend.

    Rika
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Destination weddings shouldn't be a thing unless all of your guests are rich and have no commitment. Most people don't have crazy money to spend on someone else's wedding and can't afford to take time off work or get a nanny. Plus, making it a childfree wedding when a lot of people who are supposed to attend are breastfeeding is plain ridiculous, they obviously need the baby to be with them.

    Delicate Fcuking Flower
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I could neither have a destination wedding nor would I wanna attend one because, as the British say "I can't be arsed" which is really the only eloquent way I can think of phrasing my feelings towards it all

    Load More Replies...
    FreeTheUnicorn
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Don't go to a destination wedding if you have an infant. If you don't have childcare have a parent stay home.

    Mi So
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This feels so similar to an issue we had with our wedding, except we did not have a destination wedding & most people didn’t have to travel at all. Big exception were my brother & SIL, who were both in our wedding party, & their 1 y/o. We had childfree wedding, assuming 1y/o could stay with SIL’s family….turns out, she didn’t feel comfortable leaving him with her mom or sister. So we adjusted - we dressed him like his dad, declared him a “ring bearer”, hired in a mother’s helper (with my cousin for backup) who could take him out of the ceremony if he was loud, & set up a crib in the bridal suite. Cost to his parents-$0. But still basically a childfree wedding for us.Still close to my SIL, she trusts husband & I with her kid (but not her fam), & no strain on the relationship, making them choose. People need to realize their wedding may be the event of the year & centre of the universe FOR THEM, but not for everyone else. They are the main character ONLY in their own story.

    Mark Childers
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Personally, I think all weddings should be child free. The kids are bored out of their minds and will probably act up, and it's an adult event. I also feel that destination weddings are selfish. If a couple thinks they need to get married out of the country, great! They should have a blast. Then have the reception back at home so people can actually attend without going into debt. I feel like it's all for social media.

    K Barnes
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    First world problems. If you have a baby that you can't separate from then you can't go to a childfree destination wedding. No need for all this drama over something so straightforward.

    We ride at dawn biatches
    Community Member
    2 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My family is huge, when someone gets married children of all ages are always welcome. It's supposed to be a happy day with your loved ones. As a toddler I was taken on the dancefloor by older cousins, as a mother now myself I took my baby to another cousins wedding party. Just normal.

    Sabrina
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When one of my friends got married in another country, she paid for our maid of honor's clothes and hotel, as well as transport to and from the event, since it is a nearby country, we could take a coach back, which was provided by them as well. There has never been a child-free event at our cultural wedding.

    Miriam Insidecor
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's their wedding. If they don't want kids there then that's fine.

    Load More Comments
    Zelda McLink
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you have a destination wedding, you have to accept that a lot of people won't be able to make it, no matter how much they love you. If it's a choice between rent and someone else's wedding, your rent always gonna win.

    Rafael
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The person holding the friendship hostage over a party isn't a friend.

    Rika
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Destination weddings shouldn't be a thing unless all of your guests are rich and have no commitment. Most people don't have crazy money to spend on someone else's wedding and can't afford to take time off work or get a nanny. Plus, making it a childfree wedding when a lot of people who are supposed to attend are breastfeeding is plain ridiculous, they obviously need the baby to be with them.

    Delicate Fcuking Flower
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I could neither have a destination wedding nor would I wanna attend one because, as the British say "I can't be arsed" which is really the only eloquent way I can think of phrasing my feelings towards it all

    Load More Replies...
    FreeTheUnicorn
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Don't go to a destination wedding if you have an infant. If you don't have childcare have a parent stay home.

    Mi So
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This feels so similar to an issue we had with our wedding, except we did not have a destination wedding & most people didn’t have to travel at all. Big exception were my brother & SIL, who were both in our wedding party, & their 1 y/o. We had childfree wedding, assuming 1y/o could stay with SIL’s family….turns out, she didn’t feel comfortable leaving him with her mom or sister. So we adjusted - we dressed him like his dad, declared him a “ring bearer”, hired in a mother’s helper (with my cousin for backup) who could take him out of the ceremony if he was loud, & set up a crib in the bridal suite. Cost to his parents-$0. But still basically a childfree wedding for us.Still close to my SIL, she trusts husband & I with her kid (but not her fam), & no strain on the relationship, making them choose. People need to realize their wedding may be the event of the year & centre of the universe FOR THEM, but not for everyone else. They are the main character ONLY in their own story.

    Mark Childers
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Personally, I think all weddings should be child free. The kids are bored out of their minds and will probably act up, and it's an adult event. I also feel that destination weddings are selfish. If a couple thinks they need to get married out of the country, great! They should have a blast. Then have the reception back at home so people can actually attend without going into debt. I feel like it's all for social media.

    K Barnes
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    First world problems. If you have a baby that you can't separate from then you can't go to a childfree destination wedding. No need for all this drama over something so straightforward.

    We ride at dawn biatches
    Community Member
    2 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My family is huge, when someone gets married children of all ages are always welcome. It's supposed to be a happy day with your loved ones. As a toddler I was taken on the dancefloor by older cousins, as a mother now myself I took my baby to another cousins wedding party. Just normal.

    Sabrina
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When one of my friends got married in another country, she paid for our maid of honor's clothes and hotel, as well as transport to and from the event, since it is a nearby country, we could take a coach back, which was provided by them as well. There has never been a child-free event at our cultural wedding.

    Miriam Insidecor
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's their wedding. If they don't want kids there then that's fine.

    Load More Comments
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