"So I shouldn't throw him in the fire?"
3 year old daughter holding her baby brother for the first time.
My youngest now 5 started talking super early; like full sentence talking, everyone was shocked by how well he talked for his age.(3 older siblings) So at a year in a half he would tell me he begged God to let me be his mommy. He would says things like "I was an angel in heaven" and "I had another mommy but I wanted you", "I'm so glad God let you be my mommy". We weren't super religious at the time and I just hadn't found a church so it was really random to hear him talk about God, heaven and Angels especially before my other kids actually leaned about religion.
I had just took a pregnancy test that came up positive confirming I was pregnant with our 4th baby. I was pretty freaked out and a little surprised and had to keep a straight face because we had company at the time and my husband didn't even know I was taking it. I leave the bathroom and sit on the couch. My oldest son (barely 5 years old at the time) comes over to me acting giddy and goofy and as soon as everyone is out of the living room says to me in a whisper voice "Mom, I know". Me, having not said a single thing about it didn't know what he was referring to. "Know what?" I say back with a smile, thinking he's just being goofy. "That there's a baby in your belly!" He whispers with a huge grin and runs off.
I felt like I had seen a ghost! To this day I have no clue how he could have known that when I myself had just found out minutes before! When I asked him later how he knew, he responded "I just knew!".
When my youngest daughter was about 2-3 we were just talking and she said "I died all by myself" I asked her why she was talking about. She said "not when you was my mommy, when I lived with my old mommy. She had brown skin and so did I. The spider bit me and I died all by myself!" She is deathly afraid of spiders still and she is almost 13!!
My four year old son said, "Daddy, I want to drill into your tummy, crawl inside and eat your dinner." The food was ok but I didn't think it was worth that much effort.
A little neighbor kid I use to babysit was quietly playing with his toys when, without looking up, he says to me, "you look so different now." I had to ask him what he meant. "You mean how different I look with makeup?" And he said, "no, a long long time ago. A LONG long time ago." He seemed frustrated, like he couldn't find the right words. He then looked up, studied my face and said, "well, not that different. You're still pretty."
It was the strangest compliment I've ever received.
“My daughter and I were reading on the couch one Sunday morning. It was raining outside. We were wrapped up warm in a blanket. She had a cup of tea. I had that perfect Americano. Life was good. My daughter looked up at me and said, ‘Dad, when you die can I cut you open and look inside?’ I choked a bit on my coffee. My wife simply turned around and did an about-face and walked back upstairs. ‘Sure, I said.’ She looked up at me, smiling.”
When my son was 2 I told him to be careful when he was jumping around. He said "it's ok mom, grandpa George is watching me". My dad passed away when my son was 2 months old and we hadn't really talked about him.
Not a parent, but a former teacher.
I taught English in a school in Spain, and I wasn't supposed to let the kids know that I speak Spanish (so that they are forced to communicate in English). A 10-year-old girl comes up to me one day, grabs me by the hand, and says, with the most horrifying straight face ever, "Te vas a la muerte", or "you're going to die". I was so shocked at the randomness of it that my jaw must have dropped. She then laughed her head off and said, "HA! You DO speak Spanish!". She then skipped away, laughing and smiling.
Creepiest thing a kid has ever said to me. And probably the most clever thing a kid ever did while I was a teacher.
“My daughter’s friend’s dad, Ian, came in for a cup of tea one day when he came to pick his daughter up. My girl, Izzy, was playing with a toy sword. Ian said to her, ‘You know, Izzy, the pen is mightier than the sword.’ Izzy said, ‘I know, yeah, because you can stab someone in the neck with a pen."