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Cultural Torture: A Hilarious Guide On How To Piss Off People In Different Countries (10 Pics)
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Want to know how to easily piss people off in their own countries? Then check out this helpful guide by Cale, the artist behind the popular webcomic Things In Squares. Whether you're looking to upset the French, the Germans, the Mexicans or the Japanese, his tongue-in-cheek comics will show you the best way to go about it. Don't like the Italians? Then abuse their beloved spaghetti and watch the tears begin to fall. Want to know what really upsets an American? Give them a normal-sized plate of healthy food and find out for yourself. And if you really want to hurt a Canadian then just assume they're American and you've made an enemy for life. Scroll down to see if you can find your own country in there. Did he get it right? Let us know in the comments below, and don't forget to vote for the best!
More info: Things In Squares (h/t: designyoutrust)
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Not true: most Italians break spaghetti. Moreover, "mama" is wrong. Correct word is "mamma".
Idk, I come from an italian family and doing this is worst than killing the Pope.
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I will never get ppl who cut/break their spaghetti, you just have to wait 30s and they'll be soft enough to enter in your pan. And full spaghetti are easier to eat :/
Agree! Much easier! I would have trouble in eating half-cut spaghetti.
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it's "mamma", not "mama FFS. Add this to the list of things that piss Italians off: the constant butchering of the Italian language by English speakers.
It's a sinn to beak in half. First of all because it's not practice. You can't use a spoon to eat the spaghetti properly. The lengh of macaroni is not long enough to wrap up the fork, but is long enough to create a mess, from sauce splashes everywhere (mostly on clothes). - I am Greek, spaghetti lover! I hate breaking in half, overcooked spaghetti...
Anch'io!!! Non ho pentole così alte e non ho tempo di aspettare che tutti gli spaghetti finiscano sott'acqua!!!! :-)
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Ow. That's actually a torture. How can you eat them then? With a damn SPOON?
Lol many Americans do! At least they use a cucchiaione big spoon to"hold" the pasta on the fork! Too damn much sauce, too heavy!
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They now sell "Pot-sized" spaghetti, it's literally just spaghetti cut in half. Was taking half a second to break spaghetti too difficult for some people?
My adult kids cut up their spaghetti. I tried & tried to teach them to twirl but they never got it, I mean this is not hard to do! They're good kids so if this is the worst they do I'll die a happy Mother
I am also a breaker, i love to do that (it makes me nervous to think about, half of the spaghetti is standing out a while and would be cooked later then the rest) 😂🙈 By the way, i live in Switzerland 😂
It’s only logical to break it up into small pieces that will not slop around on the fork and spray sauce on your shirt!
Guys, Italian or not, just don't do this. It's a shame and an act of violence against such a beautifully simple product. :(
Why do people protest to this?! It's just comedy?! Why do some people feel the need to contradict everything they see?!
Or you could go to a restaurant in Italy and ask for some olive oil to dip your bread in.
Here in the US we break that shit cos its too long for the pot and long strings is a mess. And im uh 40% italian, i dont care...lol
Italians break spaghetti. My mom is first generation right off the cannoli boat.
Both my grandmothers broke pasta before they cooked it. When you have a big family you do it that way. More fits in the pot and the little ones can eat it better.
Lol, I am Italian, raised in Italy, I never saw anybody break spaghetti. If you want shorter pasta, there are different kinds to choose. Breaking spaghetti is like breaking some lovely Asian ramen noodles, you want them long, so you can roll them around the fork a few times, and get a nice juicy mouthful... That' s all. I advise not to break them. On the other side Italy is still very regional and you never know, maybe in other regions, with some local dishes they do break spaghetti? I can' t completely exclude it.
Everytime someone does that, somewhere in Italy a grandma dies... Just wanted you to know :D
Ah Hah! Most Italians are gonna be pissed with Filipinos... They break 'em spaghetti and cook it with sugar and banana ketchup.
im full blooded italian , my dad was off the boat , he and my mom both did the cooking and they always broke the spaghetti in half , i never asked why but i think so when you twirl the spaghetti around the fork , you can better control how much is being on the fork
A better example might have been someone trying to add some parmigiano reggiano to a fish pasta or risotto.
Ok now, let´s get to HOW to cook spaghetti without breaking it in half (as taught by my Italian ex mother in law): put the whole spaghetti in boiling water, then gently push them inside with a wooden spoon as they begin to soften until they are entirely immersed. Then put the lid on the pot until the boiling wáter rises and boils over. Only then take the lid off and stir a bit, always with your wooden spoon. Keep boiling (turn down the fire a bit but keep boiling) and wait until it´s al dente.
There is a culinary reason not to do it. The spaghetti don't taste de same, they are worst.
Do you want to know how to REALLY annoy a mexican? Tell us how much you like mexican food followed by "... at Taco Bell".
Lol I'm peruvian and I know many of us would react like that xD I'd be willing to try and be polite though.
Why are they all chained???
If you check the link on the address bar of your browser, you will see something like "cultural-torture-things...", I guess the original title or idea of the post was about torturing people from different countries, but they decided to change the title.
Well it's supposed to be torture
I had the same question!
I think it's meant to symbolize people being chained to their beliefs.
Funny but a bit stereotypical (?)
well, obviously
That's the joke you fucking moron
That supposed to be the funny part ;)
Or how to piss off a stereo-type of different countries.
which is the fucking point of the article...
How to piss off a portuguese: "So, you're from spain!".
Or Brazil, or that they speak Brazilian.
Portuguese here; can confirm.
Belgium: tell them you prefer Swiss chocolate or German beers.
No, the best way to piss off the Belgians is to force them to eat American chocolate or drink the American swill
Isn't Budweiser owned by a Belgian company now?
Do Norway!!
Assume that we are from Sweden, I presume...
for british people, get them to make tea but make them put the milk in first. (Im British)
Or microwave the water instead of boiling it
Sweden: talk to them unexpectedly at the bus stop
Diga a um brasileiro que ele é argentino...
If there was a no one it would be something along the lines of “no gumboots” or “where in Australia are you from” (New Zealand HATES Australia)((I’m a New Zealander))
“No one” was supposed to be NZ
Brazil: Say that Argentina is better.
This is not the funny.....i'm surprised I even got to the bottom.
Xenophobia is fucking hilarious!
England: Make a cup of tea the colour of hearing-aid beige. Wales: Call them English. Scotland: Call them British. Ireland:....actually I can't think of anything that would annoy them
Ay no weon que asco
# 8 Not true! Mexicans hate people think of hard shell tacos, chimichangas, burritos, etc as Mexican food. Also, there's no such thing as street tacos or soft shell tacos. Soft or street tacos are just "Tacos" that is the way they are supposed to be. Never made with flour tortilla, ground beef, sour cream, cheese or lettuce. Are you kidding me?!?!?! The end! LOL
Wouldn't the first one work with a lot of countries these days?
Ways to piss off a Japanese: 1. Listen to your music loudly in public 2. Ignore elderly people on the train while sitting. 3. Litter. 4. Leave a tip. 5. Don't slurp your noodles. 6. Don't bring a gift to a friend's house 7. Assume that what is shown in anime is true 8. Blow your nose in public 9. Wreak havoc at a shrine 10. Don't speak formally to your elders/employers.
There is no Chilean ceviche what exists is a badly named pisco Chilean that in fact is a poor brandy. Our cultural torture is that they take possession of pisco, lomo saltado, suspiro limeño, etc, And sell it to the world like yours.
I always break spaghetti in two and I'm Italian. We all do except know-it-all food bores (all of them men btw).
I am born Indian and I eat with my left hand
I am Indian and I eat with left hand only
This was beyond stupid, stereotypical and obvious... I want 1 minute of my life back.
MEH
This is all so . . . cheap. Of course, I should have guessed that from the use of the words "to piss off people", but I was hoping the writer had ideas that generally transcended eighth grade.
Indonesians: let them eat with their left hand. They wash their butts with it
were are the muslims?
Nobody dare offend a muslim! They start a riot.
Please do the Icelandic ones!
Pronounce Oahu's "Likelike (Lee-Kay Lee-Kay) Highway" as like-like highway.
where's the British?
I would suggest "to force Czech people drink Slovakian beer" :-D
They forgot the English: Ask them if they're gay or just English.
What is that supposed to mean?
Huh, so it does work
How to piss off any African. Tell them that Africa is a country.
To piss off Mexicans, give them American-style hard-shell tortilla chips with meat and assorted vegetables and call it a taco. To piss off non-Mexico City Mexicans, ask them whether they like their quesadilla with or without cheese. Conversely, to piss of Mexico City Mexicans, give them a quesadilla with cheese without asking first.
Let em eat Shawarmarittos!
In Italian it's "Mamma" with a double "M". If you really want to stereotype us, at least do it properly.
Put in front of ANY Slav vegetarian food , or in front of Bosniak "burek" without meat
Most of these are recast bad ethnic jokes. Thumbs down.
Every nations has the different people... I like American people like Donald Trump, Ivanka Trump, Miranda Lambert and Nicole Kidman, and I do not like John Mccain...
I am from Québec and I will be very pleased if someone ask me if I am from US instead of canada.
Yeah well go be a part of their country then. We won't miss you.
Quebec? is that still part of canada? ;)
Lame.
Only stereotypes, and most of them not true.
Let's rename this post "How many tone deaf cultural stereotypes can we cram into one post?"
Belgium: 1/ tell them that these Swiss chocolates are amazing or that you love German beers best.
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Not sure if this is racist.
I am sure that it isn't because these are not differentiating between people based on their race but their nationality. I hope that helps.
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It is. It's elementary school "humour". Of course, there are going to be dozens of people down voting us because they've been raised to give a trophy to anyone just for showing up and they can't bear to call crap what it is; crap.
Thanks for telling us the facts and not just your miserable opinion. I downvoted you, btw. Twice.
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Wow. Bigot, much? How did "let's crap on every international stereotype and pretend that we're being funny", translate to actually being funny? Get back to us when you graduate from Grade Six.
Why are they all chained???
If you check the link on the address bar of your browser, you will see something like "cultural-torture-things...", I guess the original title or idea of the post was about torturing people from different countries, but they decided to change the title.
Well it's supposed to be torture
I had the same question!
I think it's meant to symbolize people being chained to their beliefs.
Funny but a bit stereotypical (?)
well, obviously
That's the joke you fucking moron
That supposed to be the funny part ;)
Or how to piss off a stereo-type of different countries.
which is the fucking point of the article...
How to piss off a portuguese: "So, you're from spain!".
Or Brazil, or that they speak Brazilian.
Portuguese here; can confirm.
Belgium: tell them you prefer Swiss chocolate or German beers.
No, the best way to piss off the Belgians is to force them to eat American chocolate or drink the American swill
Isn't Budweiser owned by a Belgian company now?
Do Norway!!
Assume that we are from Sweden, I presume...
for british people, get them to make tea but make them put the milk in first. (Im British)
Or microwave the water instead of boiling it
Sweden: talk to them unexpectedly at the bus stop
Diga a um brasileiro que ele é argentino...
If there was a no one it would be something along the lines of “no gumboots” or “where in Australia are you from” (New Zealand HATES Australia)((I’m a New Zealander))
“No one” was supposed to be NZ
Brazil: Say that Argentina is better.
This is not the funny.....i'm surprised I even got to the bottom.
Xenophobia is fucking hilarious!
England: Make a cup of tea the colour of hearing-aid beige. Wales: Call them English. Scotland: Call them British. Ireland:....actually I can't think of anything that would annoy them
Ay no weon que asco
# 8 Not true! Mexicans hate people think of hard shell tacos, chimichangas, burritos, etc as Mexican food. Also, there's no such thing as street tacos or soft shell tacos. Soft or street tacos are just "Tacos" that is the way they are supposed to be. Never made with flour tortilla, ground beef, sour cream, cheese or lettuce. Are you kidding me?!?!?! The end! LOL
Wouldn't the first one work with a lot of countries these days?
Ways to piss off a Japanese: 1. Listen to your music loudly in public 2. Ignore elderly people on the train while sitting. 3. Litter. 4. Leave a tip. 5. Don't slurp your noodles. 6. Don't bring a gift to a friend's house 7. Assume that what is shown in anime is true 8. Blow your nose in public 9. Wreak havoc at a shrine 10. Don't speak formally to your elders/employers.
There is no Chilean ceviche what exists is a badly named pisco Chilean that in fact is a poor brandy. Our cultural torture is that they take possession of pisco, lomo saltado, suspiro limeño, etc, And sell it to the world like yours.
I always break spaghetti in two and I'm Italian. We all do except know-it-all food bores (all of them men btw).
I am born Indian and I eat with my left hand
I am Indian and I eat with left hand only
This was beyond stupid, stereotypical and obvious... I want 1 minute of my life back.
MEH
This is all so . . . cheap. Of course, I should have guessed that from the use of the words "to piss off people", but I was hoping the writer had ideas that generally transcended eighth grade.
Indonesians: let them eat with their left hand. They wash their butts with it
were are the muslims?
Nobody dare offend a muslim! They start a riot.
Please do the Icelandic ones!
Pronounce Oahu's "Likelike (Lee-Kay Lee-Kay) Highway" as like-like highway.
where's the British?
I would suggest "to force Czech people drink Slovakian beer" :-D
They forgot the English: Ask them if they're gay or just English.
What is that supposed to mean?
Huh, so it does work
How to piss off any African. Tell them that Africa is a country.
To piss off Mexicans, give them American-style hard-shell tortilla chips with meat and assorted vegetables and call it a taco. To piss off non-Mexico City Mexicans, ask them whether they like their quesadilla with or without cheese. Conversely, to piss of Mexico City Mexicans, give them a quesadilla with cheese without asking first.
Let em eat Shawarmarittos!
In Italian it's "Mamma" with a double "M". If you really want to stereotype us, at least do it properly.
Put in front of ANY Slav vegetarian food , or in front of Bosniak "burek" without meat
Most of these are recast bad ethnic jokes. Thumbs down.
Every nations has the different people... I like American people like Donald Trump, Ivanka Trump, Miranda Lambert and Nicole Kidman, and I do not like John Mccain...
I am from Québec and I will be very pleased if someone ask me if I am from US instead of canada.
Yeah well go be a part of their country then. We won't miss you.
Quebec? is that still part of canada? ;)
Lame.
Only stereotypes, and most of them not true.
Let's rename this post "How many tone deaf cultural stereotypes can we cram into one post?"
Belgium: 1/ tell them that these Swiss chocolates are amazing or that you love German beers best.
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
Not sure if this is racist.
I am sure that it isn't because these are not differentiating between people based on their race but their nationality. I hope that helps.
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
It is. It's elementary school "humour". Of course, there are going to be dozens of people down voting us because they've been raised to give a trophy to anyone just for showing up and they can't bear to call crap what it is; crap.
Thanks for telling us the facts and not just your miserable opinion. I downvoted you, btw. Twice.
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
Wow. Bigot, much? How did "let's crap on every international stereotype and pretend that we're being funny", translate to actually being funny? Get back to us when you graduate from Grade Six.