ADVERTISEMENT

There is a vast valley with steep slopes and a raging river winding its way through the bottom that separates the people who are genuinely nice and those who only proclaim themselves to be ‘nice.’ Most of us know from experience that guys who are actually nice act very differently than those who are ‘nice guys.’

However, this post isn’t about nice guys. No, this one is about nice girls. Or rather—‘nice girls’ who believe they’re entitled to ‘perfect’ partners while dripping with hatred for the world and showing their true colors when things don’t go their way. In fact, there’s a place where they get called out: the r/Nicegirls subreddit that proves that fake ‘niceness’ knows no gender boundaries. See for your yourselves, dear Pandas. Be sure to read on for Bored Panda's interview with one of the moderators of the subreddit, user CTFOE_is_Free.

#2

What A Sweetheart

What A Sweetheart

reddit.com Report

Selfishness and altruism aren't as black and white as you might think. According to research, human history has shown that some forms of selfishness can be considered to be "healthy" while some altruism can be "pathological." Healthy selfishness led to higher levels of psychological well-being and a "genuine prosocial orientation." Meanwhile, pathological altruism was associated with vulnerable narcissism and selfish motivations for helping others. If that sounds familiar, it's the scientific basis for the difference between nice and 'nice.'

Moderator CTFOE_is_Fee told Bored Panda that the reason why some women are 'nice girls' is a combination of a few factors. "Some of them are too immature to realize what they're doing. Others are that manipulative on purpose. Lastly, some do not even realize what they're doing," they explained.

#4

But Why? Smh Entitled Queens Lol

But Why? Smh Entitled Queens Lol

reddit.com Report

Add photo comments
POST
zoeschreurs avatar
Sowieso
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This kind of messaging is why men think they should try harder, and how you create an unsafe feeling for a lot of woman. Because a man will take away from this that no means yes. And that you have to keep trying, even though the woman made clear that she is not into you. It's a dangerous game to play!

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
ADVERTISEMENT
#6

The Cat Isn’t What He Should Be Getting Rid Of

The Cat Isn’t What He Should Be Getting Rid Of

reddit.com Report

Add photo comments
POST
wandiledludlu avatar
Sum Guy
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The cat has been there before her and judging by her being jealous of a cat, the cat will be there after she's gone

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu

We were curious to find out where the line between genuine niceness and fake 'niceness' was for the moderator. Here's what they had to say: "Personally, for me, the line is drawn when you can tell that someone is being passive-aggressive; when you can sense the subdued maliciousness in their words and actions. If your gut is telling you that something is not genuine about the person then they probably are not genuine. I think we've all experienced a few relationships like that in our lives. I do not see there being a large grey area between the two. You know when someone is being kind or not."

According to CTFOE_is_free, one of the things that new members need to keep in mind if they decide to join up is to read and follow the subreddit rules. "We have a strict No doxxing policy, as we work to respect and protect the privacy of the subjects of the content as well as that of the posters."

#7

I Went On One Date With This Girl And She Spent The Whole Time On Her Phone Drinking Coffee I Bought Her

I Went On One Date With This Girl And She Spent The Whole Time On Her Phone Drinking Coffee I Bought Her

reddit.com Report

ADVERTISEMENT
#9

A Message To All Nice Girls Who Might Have A Screw Loose

A Message To All Nice Girls Who Might Have A Screw Loose

reddit.com Report

Add photo comments
POST
thomas_maertens avatar
Saint Thomas
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Or maybe... confront him and talk about it ? Then make a decision ? I understand this is meant as a kind of joke with a twist, but it's not good advice, either way.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
ADVERTISEMENT

According to the creators of the subreddit, the 'Nice Girls' community is like the ‘Nice Guys’ online group, but different in that they focus on women instead. Bored Panda has even written about them before. You can check out that post right over here once you’re done enjoying this list. Spoiler alert: proclaiming that you’re nice doesn’t make it so. The proof is in how you act, not the mild-mannered facade you show the world.

“For all the self-proclaimed ‘nice girls.’ For the women who complain ‘guys are only interested in [promiscuous women].’ For women who complain that men are shallow for not dating overweight women, while also demanding that their man have washboard abs. For the women who hold others to the highest possible standard, but have no standards for themselves,” the r/Nicegirls creators explain what their group is all about.

#10

A Nicegirl Daydream

A Nicegirl Daydream

reddit.com Report

#11

Now That's A Logical Leap

Now That's A Logical Leap

reddit.com Report

Add photo comments
POST
anaelena avatar
Whimsy
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Laughter is not good for my tummy pain right now, but that reply was funny as heck.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu

The main focus of the subreddit is to shame these ‘nice girls’ in all their glory through images, articles, videos, and everything else. “This sub is not for female incels. This place is not for crazy girls. If you swap the genders and it doesn't belong on r/niceguys, then don't post it,” they explain.

ADVERTISEMENT

What’s more, the moderators point out that their community is “not a women hating subreddit.” They encourage members to be polite and “refrain from making sexist comments or being a bigot.” They have a zero-tolerance policy regarding things like that, so mind your manners. Yes, there’s a certain unsurprising irony there that a group about shaming people who are supposedly ‘nice’ actually requires folks to be nice.

However, just because r/Nicegirls deems these women worthy of being shamed doesn’t mean that they’re having an all-out war with them. Members of the group can’t post any identifying information about people: this way, they’re protected from internet users who might want to criticize them or insult them. After all, just because someone’s ‘nice’ now doesn’t mean that they’re not learning to be actually, genuinely nice. I’m a big believer that people can change if they set their minds to it.

#13

So You Know It's Wrong, But You Did It Anyway?

So You Know It's Wrong, But You Did It Anyway?

reddit.com Report

Add photo comments
POST
james_fox1984 avatar
Foxxy (The Original)
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Oh boy, and I bet that she still doesn't get the irony after being called out on it.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#14

So I Broke My Leg, And She Wanted To Go On A Date....

So I Broke My Leg, And She Wanted To Go On A Date....

reddit.com Report

#15

"I Just Said Goodnight, But I'm Gonna Throw A Tantrum If You Say Goodnight Back"

"I Just Said Goodnight, But I'm Gonna Throw A Tantrum If You Say Goodnight Back"

reddit.com Report

Add photo comments
POST
james_fox1984 avatar
Foxxy (The Original)
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Oh yeah coz men can read our minds and know exactly how we are feeling. How about stop playing games and tell him.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu

Urban Dictionary defines 'nice girls' as women who believe they're the best choice to be someone's girlfriend. They're deemed by the internet to be manipulative, have self-esteem issues, and can be passive-aggressive. They also have problems with jealousy and being self-centered. Especially if rejected.

ADVERTISEMENT
#16

The "I Don't Want Anything" Classic

The "I Don't Want Anything" Classic

reddit.com Report

Add photo comments
POST
james_fox1984 avatar
Foxxy (The Original)
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ugh another one playing stupid Games. If you say you don't want something then expect to not get it.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#17

Spanish Girls Are Her #1 Enemy

Spanish Girls Are Her #1 Enemy

reddit.com Report

#18

We Have The FBI And Then We Have This

We Have The FBI And Then We Have This

reddit.com Report

Add photo comments
POST
james_fox1984 avatar
Foxxy (The Original)
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What an absolute f*****g bitch. There is no sugar coating how I feel about people doing s**t like this.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu

Usually, 'nice girls' are women who get others to pity her into dating her. In short, they're the female version of 'nice guys,' with all the drama and seething hatred you'd expect to see from them. Both 'nice girls' and 'nice guys' feel like they deserve to be in a relationship with anyone that they want or anyone that so much as smiles at them.

#19

Double Standards Are Great !

Double Standards Are Great !

reddit.com Report

#20

There’ll Be Blizzard In Hell Before I Stop Eating Cinnamon Toast Crunch For Breakfast

There’ll Be Blizzard In Hell Before I Stop Eating Cinnamon Toast Crunch For Breakfast

reddit.com Report

They also believe that the world owes them what they want just because they're 'well-mannered.' The moment things go south and they don't get what they want, they rage at the world and proclaim that it's not fair that things are this way. Whereas a genuinely nice person is kind to others without expecting a reward, a self-proclaimed 'nice girl' or 'nice guy' hides the fact that they're really just after the reward. Usually, the reward they have in mind is romantic or [ahem] something more.

ADVERTISEMENT
#23

I'm Sure Nick Appreciates Your Support!

I'm Sure Nick Appreciates Your Support!

reddit.com Report

#24

My Ex Girlfriend Wanted To Meet For A Drink And I Said No As I Was Visiting My Terminally Ill Grandmother. She Said My Grandmother Was Lucky Be Dying Because She Would Be Ashamed Of Me. Then Put This Message On Her Instagram

My Ex Girlfriend Wanted To Meet For A Drink And I Said No As I Was Visiting My Terminally Ill Grandmother. She Said My Grandmother Was Lucky Be Dying Because She Would Be Ashamed Of Me. Then Put This Message On Her Instagram

reddit.com Report

The Gentleman’s Journal suggests that the difference between nice and ‘nice’ depends on how honest we are with ourselves about our intentions. For instance, they explain that you should be generous, but that you shouldn’t use your generosity as a bargaining chip for other things. That means that why you’re doing something is just as important as the fact that you’re doing it.

#25

Don't Get Me What I Ask For

Don't Get Me What I Ask For

reddit.com Report

Add photo comments
POST
evacheong avatar
Eva the Egg
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Come on, you cant be THAT unappreciative! You should be grateful you even have a boyfriend with that attitude

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#27

My Ex Sent Death Treats To Me On My Birthday, This Was What Happened Afterwardss

My Ex Sent Death Treats To Me On My Birthday, This Was What Happened Afterwardss

reddit.com Report

One thought in particular raised by the Gentleman’s Journal stuck in my mind: “Do be kind. But don’t do it just because you think you ought to.” The implication here is simple: being kind is vital. However, making the decision to be kind because you believe it’s the right thing to do is the key here.

#29

Nice Girls Don’t Exi-

Nice Girls Don’t Exi-

reddit.com Report

Add photo comments
POST
james_fox1984 avatar
Foxxy (The Original)
Community Member
3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That's insane, I think she needs professional help. Super stalkerish. Hopefully she was charged.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu

Being nice, polite, and kind just because you feel pressured to doesn’t make you nice. It makes you ‘nice.’ After all, kindness under duress isn’t really kindness, is it? But what do you think, dear Pandas? Why do you think ‘nice girls’ and ‘nice guys’ act the way that they do? Where do you think the line between actual kindness and fake kindness lies? Can we tell which is which from a distance? Share your thoughts with everyone else in the comments below.

#31

Okay, Thats Not Toxic At All

Okay, Thats Not Toxic At All

reddit.com Report

#32

It's Only Okay If I Can Go Through Your Phone

It's Only Okay If I Can Go Through Your Phone

reddit.com Report

Add photo comments
POST
james_fox1984 avatar
Foxxy (The Original)
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If you can't trust your partner and have to go through their phone then maybe it's the wrong relationship for you or you need help with getting over your trust issues.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#33

Damn... I Don‘T Even Know Her

Damn... I Don‘T Even Know Her

reddit.com Report

See Also on Bored Panda
#34

It’s Almost Like They’re There To Workout?

It’s Almost Like They’re There To Workout?

reddit.com Report

Add photo comments
POST
wandiledludlu avatar
Sum Guy
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wow... they are focused on working out at the gym? I have never heard of that before

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#36

The Truth Comes Out. My Former Best Friend, Who I Ended Up Dating And Then It Killed Off Our Friendship When Things Went South

The Truth Comes Out. My Former Best Friend, Who I Ended Up Dating And Then It Killed Off Our Friendship When Things Went South

reddit.com Report

#37

Feel Like This Belongs Here

Feel Like This Belongs Here

reddit.com Report

#38

And Breaking Worth 40$ Isn't Cruel?

And Breaking Worth 40$ Isn't Cruel?

reddit.com Report

Add photo comments
POST
lsoo avatar
Raine Soo
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yeah, keep on telling yourself that after your boyfriend breaks up with you, and you're sitting home alone fuming.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#39

This Is The Second Time I've Ever Talked To Her, What The Hell

This Is The Second Time I've Ever Talked To Her, What The Hell

reddit.com Report

#41

Nice Girl Gets Called Out

Nice Girl Gets Called Out

reddit.com Report

#42

It Do Be Like That

It Do Be Like That

reddit.com Report

Add photo comments
POST
bp_10 avatar
WilvanderHeijden
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"Why do you guys always take thing so litterally?" (Proceeds to teach the dude how women never mean what they say and you'll always have to do the opposite of what they are saying....)

View more commentsArrow down menu
#43

Found On Facebook. I Pray This Was Posted As A Joke

Found On Facebook. I Pray This Was Posted As A Joke

reddit.com Report

See Also on Bored Panda
#45

Girlfriend Cheated On Me. Broke Up With Her Then She Sent This

Girlfriend Cheated On Me. Broke Up With Her Then She Sent This

reddit.com Report

#46

God Dammit! This Guys Always Tryng To Flirt With Smiley Emojis!

God Dammit! This Guys Always Tryng To Flirt With Smiley Emojis!

reddit.com Report

#47

What A Wonderfully Nice Attitude! It's A Wonder Why She Has Trouble Dating!

What A Wonderfully Nice Attitude! It's A Wonder Why She Has Trouble Dating!

reddit.com Report

Add photo comments
POST
mohsie avatar
Mohsie Supposie
Community Member
3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Imagine a man creating a female height chart like that. What kind of names would you call him? Now apply those names to this lady!

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#48

The Duality Of (Wo) Men

The Duality Of (Wo) Men

reddit.com Report

#49

"He Should Either Talk To Me Or Be Asleep"

"He Should Either Talk To Me Or Be Asleep"

reddit.com Report

#50

Denied My Friend Request? I'll Show Up At Your Job

Denied My Friend Request? I'll Show Up At Your Job

reddit.com Report

#52

She Broke Up With Me, Blocked Her On All Social Media’s And Has The Nerve To Send Me This. I Have Nothing That She Owns

She Broke Up With Me, Blocked Her On All Social Media’s And Has The Nerve To Send Me This. I Have Nothing That She Owns

reddit.com Report

See Also on Bored Panda
#55

So I Get Sex Whenever I Want, Right?

So I Get Sex Whenever I Want, Right?

reddit.com Report

Add photo comments
POST
tamsin_far avatar
Tamsin Far
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I like the weight loss add at the bottom - new diet: waiting for someone to pay for my food!

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#56

Those Damn Unattractive People Staying In Loving Relationships

Those Damn Unattractive People Staying In Loving Relationships

reddit.com Report

#57

She’s Single, Fellas

She’s Single, Fellas

reddit.com Report

#58

More Personalities Than A Swiss Army Knife

More Personalities Than A Swiss Army Knife

reddit.com Report

#59

Just Another #nicegirlsproblem

Just Another #nicegirlsproblem

reddit.com Report

#60

Btw, She Lives In Another Country

Btw, She Lives In Another Country

reddit.com Report

Add photo comments
POST
phantomaivilo avatar
Sneeze
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

wow... my gf is 500 miles away, and I'm not like that at all. I... don't understand these ppl.

View more commentsArrow down menu
#61

Because Your Guy Friends Need To Be Attracted To You, Obviously. If Not, You’re Ugly

Because Your Guy Friends Need To Be Attracted To You, Obviously. If Not, You’re Ugly

reddit.com Report

Add photo comments
POST
james_fox1984 avatar
Foxxy (The Original)
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Obviously this is someone that needs constant attention and validation. There is no way I would want any of my hubby's friends to find me attractive, that is just awkward.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
See Also on Bored Panda