Out of all types of cringe-worthy material, the "badass guy/girl" trope is one of the worst. Some people really feel the need to let the world know how much of a badass they are as they use guns/drugs/have tattoos/are anti-liberal or are just plain mean. However, such attempts at bad-assery are usually cringe-worthy rather than cool to all those around such people. Here, we made a list of all the laughable attempts at trying to appear cool and edgy. Prepare for some cringing, then scroll down below and leave a vote for those that made you laugh (or cringe).

#1

"I'm Italian. We don't call the cops - we call family"

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Xavier Wescott
Community Member
1 year ago

this is another good one, especially if your Italian!

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#2

"The dumbest thing you can possibly do is piss off my wife. She will open the gates of hell and escort your a** right on in. And she will do it with a smile on her face"

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C
Community Member
1 year ago

Purchased by his wife

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#3

"Pastor. Because hardcore devil stomping ninja isn't an official job title"

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Christina Sersif
Community Member
1 year ago

Love this one lol

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#4

"Hey snowflake, in the real world you don't get a participation trophy, not everybody is a winner, no one owes you anything, screaming doesn't make you right, sometimes you actually lose, crying doesn't solve problems, nothing is free in this world, people are going to say things that you don't like and you are not special!"

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Noonie Kehoe
Community Member
1 year ago

Has he never heard that brevity is the key of wit?

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#5

"As a September guy, I'm the kind of friend who will help you hide a dead body, but if you betray me just remember I know how to hide a dead body"

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Christina Sersif
Community Member
1 year ago

Don’t understand the September guy part, but I think it’s a funny shirt otherwise

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#6

"I came into this world kicking and screaming while covered in someone else's blood and I have no problem with going out the same way"

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C
Community Member
1 year ago

Well, that's a gross visual

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#7

"I have been the kind of man that when my feet hit the floor each morning, the devil says 'oh crap, he's up!'"

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Christina Sersif
Community Member
1 year ago

Haha this one is funny

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#8

"If this flag offends you, I'll help you pack"

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Christina Sersif
Community Member
1 year ago

I swear racists all look like Larry the cable guy

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#9

"I may seem quiet and reserved but if you mess with me while I'm bowling, I will break out a level of crazy that will make your nightmares seem like a happy place"

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Chris DiFonso
Community Member
1 year ago

Wow, I didn't know that bowlers are such tough fellas!

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#10

"Beware: I ride horses, which means I own pitchforks, have the strength to haul hay and have the guts to scream at a half ton animal after being kicked. You will not be a problem"

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Iggy
Community Member
1 year ago

Again with epistles. Keep it short!

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#11

"Too fat to run, too fat to fight, I JUST SHOOT"

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Jaguarundi
Community Member
1 year ago

Wal*Martians are an embarrassing fact of life here in the 'States.

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#12

"Oh, you ran a marathon? That's so cute! Maybe when you grow up your mommy will let you do the rest of the race!"

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ADHORTATOR
Community Member
1 year ago

Well, if he did an Ironman, he is right...

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#13

"I am the weapon"

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Noonie Kehoe
Community Member
1 year ago

And it's a pea shooter.

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#14

"Only God can decide if terrorists are right or wrong. It's our job to arrange the meeting"

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Iggy
Community Member
1 year ago

God wants a word with you in his office.

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#15

"Do I look like someone who cares what God thinks?"

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Noonie Kehoe
Community Member
1 year ago

Maybe not but he definitely cares what everyone else thinks.

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#16

"I am an asshole man: I love freedom, drink beer and love my wife. I protect my family, I eat meat and have tattoos. If you don't like it - move"

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Christina Sersif
Community Member
1 year ago

Bet this shirt was made in China

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#17

"I didn't serve this country for pussies to tell me that I should be politically correct"

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Iggy
Community Member
1 year ago

In my experience, people who object to PC ("It's PC gone mad!") have usually just been caught and called out for being racist, sexist or homophobic.

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#18

"I have three sides: the quiet side, the fun and crazy side, the side you never want to see"

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Noonie Kehoe
Community Member
1 year ago

He three sides: the quiet side; the fun & crazy side; the back side.

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#19

"As I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I will fear no evil , for I am the baddest motherf***er in the valley"

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Iggy
Community Member
1 year ago

'Baddest' MF waiting patiently in a line and wearing trainer liners.

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#20

"Peace is not my profession - it's yours. War is my profession. Should you fail at your job, I will not fail at mine"

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Amy Pattie
Community Member
1 year ago

A T-shirt worn by exactly no one in the military.

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#21

"I am 10 times the asshole you could ever hope to be. Now run along"

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Iggy
Community Member
1 year ago

Can we not even stay long enough to marvel at the sartorial elegance?

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#22

"Careful, <...> I'm this old for a reason"

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Iggy
Community Member
1 year ago

Even Death doesn't want you?

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#23

"Stay back 100 meters or you will be shot"

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Iggy
Community Member
1 year ago

No one has any intentions of going within a kilometre of you so we'll be fine.

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#24

"There are a lot of people in the world to mess with, I'm the one you may wanna skip"

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Tore Hana
Community Member
1 year ago

What’s with the constant “Mess with...” on all these shirts..?

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#25

"Obama can't ban these guns"

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Iggy
Community Member
1 year ago

Water pistols.

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#26

"If this flag offends you, you need a history lesson"

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Christina Sersif
Community Member
1 year ago

Someone has a little pp

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#27

"Forklift operator. My sense of humor may hurt your feelings or offend you. I suggest you buckle up, buttercup! I change for no one"

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C
Community Member
1 year ago

Lol, everyone at my job operates a forklift. It's not special

Koalamonster
Community Member
1 year ago

If FailArmy videos have taught me anything about forklift operators it's that not all of them should be driving forklifts.

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Monika Soffronow
Community Member
1 year ago

This is like an open declaration of being mentally stuck at 14 1/2 years of age. Cringeworthy, definitely cringeworthy.

Blue Cicada
Community Member
1 year ago

Good assessment. Applies to most of the T-shirts here.

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Amy Demo
Community Member
1 year ago

I wonder what he means by "sense of humor". My ex coworker thought that his rape jokes were part of a wonderful sense of humor.

BusLady
Community Member
1 year ago

OMG! I hope he is no longer your coworker.

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Bettina Jansen
Community Member
1 year ago

what does operating a forklift have to do with your sense of humour ?

Peta Hurley-Hill
Community Member
1 year ago

My Husband has a forklift licence...But he's only good at telling Dad jokes...Well, he THINKS he's good at telling them ;)

Lazy Panda
Community Member
1 year ago

What does being a forklift driver have to do with it

Jace
Community Member
1 year ago

Please send this to your HR department so they have it on file when someone finally submits a complaint about your abusive behavior at work.

Grumble O'Pug
Community Member
1 year ago

Spoken by the lonely old man

HoffLensMetalHedLovesAnimalsUK
Community Member
1 year ago

No i can;t change, i can;t have just a bit more humanity for other earthlings and stop thinking you own that land you call home. My god people.

Iggy
Community Member
1 year ago

We all couldn't give a fork(lift)!

Ryo Bakura
Community Member
1 year ago

The fuck is that supposed to mean?

comboplush
Community Member
1 year ago

It translates to "I made offensive jokes often enough for people to tell me to stop and I think everyone not laughing at them is a stuck-up snowflake".

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jamie1707
Community Member
1 year ago

go fuck off you massive turd.

Tore Hana
Community Member
1 year ago

I’m actually really curious to hear some good, wholesome forklift jokes now :-) Anyone?

Mary Rose Kent
Community Member
1 year ago

I’m 63 years old and I have never heard a forklift joke, wholesome or otherwise.

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elfin
Community Member
1 year ago

What humor?

Jo Choto
Community Member
1 year ago

A whole new subgenre of comedy I knew nothing about.

Louise Brigance
Community Member
1 year ago

Sorry, tie in is lost in translation.

Faramir10
Community Member
1 year ago

Thinks he's tough guy.

Small Fish
Community Member
1 year ago

At leat he doesn’t change for someone else... that’s a good thing right ?

Fred Fontaine
Community Member
1 year ago

I was a forklift operator at 15 years old. It's not that hard tough guy.

Tambot
Community Member
1 year ago

I think it's more "tongue in cheek" making fun of himself... I hope so anyways! Even I've driven a forklift before...

Jessi Zultanky
Community Member
1 year ago

What does being a forklift operator have to do with being offensive?

Mark Kelly
Community Member
1 year ago

What does that have to do with a forklift operator.

Mark Kelly
Community Member
1 year ago (edited)

All these shirts are contorted from these guys fat bodies.

Teri Donovan
Community Member
1 year ago

Gee, never knew forklift operators were comics....learn something every day!

Jessica Skorch
Community Member
1 year ago

Wait...is that a beeper?!?

Ana Vaz
Community Member
1 year ago

"Alright...but I'm confused know, tell me again how your job is affecting your (non-existent) sense of humour"

Eric Allen
Community Member
1 year ago

Who knew forklift operators were such bad asses? All this money being wasted on defense when we could just have a whole army of forklifts.

E A M
Community Member
1 year ago

ooooo.... a forklift operator... :I

Michelle Muirhead
Community Member
1 year ago

Woop de doo

ADHORTATOR
Community Member
1 year ago

Well, I used to operate forklifts when I was at the beginning of my career and I never thought to be special :-)

Mary Rose Kent
Community Member
1 year ago

You blew it!

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elfin
Community Member
7 months ago

Perhaps Sigourney Weaver could change your mind. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j51DfrLHUek

okpkpkp
Community Member
1 year ago

ha ha ha

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#28

"I oil my guns with liberal tears"

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Iggy
Community Member
1 year ago

I would have thought salty water would be bad for guns...

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#29

"Never, and I mean never, mess with 4-H kids, because in 4-H we are a family... and if you mess with the family you better run"

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Iggy
Community Member
1 year ago

Sorry, I got bored halfway through.

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#30

"Cool story, babe. Now make me a sandwich"

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C
Community Member
1 year ago

Nice fedoras tools

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Note: this post originally had 40 images. It’s been shortened to the top 30 images based on user votes.