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Out of all types of cringe-worthy material, the "badass guy/girl" trope is one of the worst. Some people really feel the need to let the world know how much of a badass they are as they use guns/drugs/have tattoos/are anti-liberal or are just plain mean. However, such attempts at bad-assery are usually cringe-worthy rather than cool to all those around such people. Here, we made a list of all the laughable attempts at trying to appear cool and edgy. Prepare for some cringing, then scroll down below and leave a vote for those that made you laugh (or cringe).

#1

"I'm Italian. We don't call the cops - we call family"

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#2

"The dumbest thing you can possibly do is piss off my wife. She will open the gates of hell and escort your a** right on in. And she will do it with a smile on her face"

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Jace
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is some of the worst text flow on a shirt I’ve seen. Why are so many of these clichéd American conservative attitude shirts full of s****y text flow and bad design? Too many different fonts and decorations around the text.

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#3

"Pastor. Because hardcore devil stomping ninja isn't an official job title"

BroThornton Report

#4

"Hey snowflake, in the real world you don't get a participation trophy, not everybody is a winner, no one owes you anything, screaming doesn't make you right, sometimes you actually lose, crying doesn't solve problems, nothing is free in this world, people are going to say things that you don't like and you are not special!"

Jackizback0 Report

#5

"As a September guy, I'm the kind of friend who will help you hide a dead body, but if you betray me just remember I know how to hide a dead body"

saggywizardsleeve Report

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Christina Sersif
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Don’t understand the September guy part, but I think it’s a funny shirt otherwise

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#6

"I came into this world kicking and screaming while covered in someone else's blood and I have no problem with going out the same way"

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#7

"I have been the kind of man that when my feet hit the floor each morning, the devil says 'oh crap, he's up!'"

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#8

"If this flag offends you, I'll help you pack"

unknown Report

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#9

"I may seem quiet and reserved but if you mess with me while I'm bowling, I will break out a level of crazy that will make your nightmares seem like a happy place"

cassette_nova Report

#10

"Beware: I ride horses, which means I own pitchforks, have the strength to haul hay and have the guts to scream at a half ton animal after being kicked. You will not be a problem"

GeekPro101 Report

#11

"Too fat to run, too fat to fight, I JUST SHOOT"

cattattattat Report

#12

"Oh, you ran a marathon? That's so cute! Maybe when you grow up your mommy will let you do the rest of the race!"

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#14

"Only God can decide if terrorists are right or wrong. It's our job to arrange the meeting"

lionheart10801 Report

#15

"Do I look like someone who cares what God thinks?"

PeteyChamp51 Report

#16

"I am an asshole man: I love freedom, drink beer and love my wife. I protect my family, I eat meat and have tattoos. If you don't like it - move"

ibepunkinmugs Report

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Theodora Graybill
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

at first i thought he was letting everyone know his sexual preference

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Kay Bee
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yeah same, was wondering if he likes to get or give it in the a-hole!!

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Karin Love
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What's up with people saying "move" to people who may not like them? Why are they so defensive and fragile? To me, this guy seems like a complete twat. Not moving. Deal with it.

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Jace
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

MURRIKA: Full of a******s who are proud to be a******s. This is one reason why some of us are embarrassed by our nationalist brethren. These f*****s think that they represent the “true America” and they have no tolerance for what “freedom” is supposed to actually represent. I’m surprised there’s no f*****g god b******t on this shirt too.

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Louise Brigance
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Why is the world such a threat, imagined mostly, to these people. They see bad people all around them. Once again most imagined. Nobody cares about your guns, your beer, if you love your wife or not and who amount us doesn't value our freedom. Grow up and get a brain, straw-man.

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Peko
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

These people have a persecution complex. No one is trying to take away freedom, beer, meat or his wife. And tattoos are pretty mainstream these days.

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Freya the Wanderer
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I love freedom and drink beer, but at least I am tolerant of people who think differently from me.

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Kris K
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm a compassionate woman...I appreciate diversity, I drink coffee, I love everyone, I eat tofu, I support my family....if YOU don't like it, YOU move!

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Mark Morey
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

More logorrhea. Just remove everything but the first four words.

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Noonie Kehoe
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Well, he got the first bit right. He's definitely one of them!

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Mewton’s Third Paw
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This makes zero sense. Why would anyone move because YOUR life is lame? Huh?

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Iapetos
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Why are so many people bragging about supporting animal cruelty? And what does that have to do with the other stuff?

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Batwench
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I really think the 1st part of this should be rephrased LOL

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Eden-Rose Huntsman
Community Member
4 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Why is that written on the back of the shirt? Why would they need to move if they are behind you...

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elfin
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have no plans on moving, but for you I think I'll double my social distancing.

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Bacony
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"A*****e Man" sounds like the third worst possible superhero, right after "Captain Guernsey" and "HIV Man"

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Jason Doakes
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yeah, we think you're an a*****e because you love your wife and your family and your beer and your meat, THAT is exactly the reason, because we don't do that..., you ignorant asocial POS.

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Ivana
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Move where? Like is this specifically for his neighbor? Is Jeff yelling over the fence at him to stop having family BBQs? Jeff is just over there like "Dude, do you really have to get drunk every night, fire up the grill and then f**k your wife in the backyard." This guy is just like "This is America, I can get drunk and f**k my wife if I want to Jeff! It's called freedom. If you don't like it then move." I mean, that is the take away I am getting from this.

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Mad Haberdasheress
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"I'm an a*****e man. . ." Thanks for the advance notice that I can stop listening to anything you have to say past that. Huge time saver!

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Erika Haynes
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

OK, but is that his wife in front of him in the neon zebra pants?

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Aaron Kara
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's difficult to take anything seriously after the proposition - "I am an a*****e man"

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Calum Rothwell
Community Member
4 years ago

This comment has been deleted.

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Bettina Jansen
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

does that means he loves his wife in the a*****e ? (being an a*****e man...)

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Chris DiFonso
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

He proves that he himself is an a-hole by wearing a shirt with "a**hole" spelled out instead of having symbols to replace some of the letters in the word.

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Monika Soffronow
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Well, all men have one, but I am so glad that far from all men are one.

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#17

"I didn't serve this country for pussies to tell me that I should be politically correct"

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Iggy
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

In my experience, people who object to PC ("It's PC gone mad!") have usually just been caught and called out for being racist, sexist or homophobic.

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#18

"I have three sides: the quiet side, the fun and crazy side, the side you never want to see"

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#19

"As I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I will fear no evil , for I am the baddest motherf***er in the valley"

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Iggy
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

'Baddest' MF waiting patiently in a line and wearing trainer liners.

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#20

"Peace is not my profession - it's yours. War is my profession. Should you fail at your job, I will not fail at mine"

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#21

"I am 10 times the asshole you could ever hope to be. Now run along"

SWEDinTexas Report

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Iggy
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Can we not even stay long enough to marvel at the sartorial elegance?

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#22

"Careful, <...> I'm this old for a reason"

IamMull Report

#23

"Stay back 100 meters or you will be shot"

LetsGoGameCrocks Report

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Iggy
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

No one has any intentions of going within a kilometre of you so we'll be fine.

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#24

"There are a lot of people in the world to mess with, I'm the one you may wanna skip"

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#26

"If this flag offends you, you need a history lesson"

Mnkeyqt Report

#27

"Forklift operator. My sense of humor may hurt your feelings or offend you. I suggest you buckle up, buttercup! I change for no one"

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Monika Soffronow
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is like an open declaration of being mentally stuck at 14 1/2 years of age. Cringeworthy, definitely cringeworthy.

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#28

"I oil my guns with liberal tears"

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#29

"Never, and I mean never, mess with 4-H kids, because in 4-H we are a family... and if you mess with the family you better run"

lofzfreak Report

#30

"Cool story, babe. Now make me a sandwich"

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Note: this post originally had 40 images. It’s been shortened to the top 30 images based on user votes.

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