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“Red Flags Everywhere”: 45 Insane Ex Stories People Are Still Recovering From
Imagine your boyfriend telling you not to touch the "cow meat" in the fridge because it belongs to a neighbor, when in reality it's another woman's carefully concealed clothing. Or, your man trying to convince you that the baby on his lap is yours, and that you've probably forgotten because of "mom brain." Plot twist: HE had the baby with someone else. Yeah, there are certain things that we just cannot make up. No matter how hard we try.
Those are just two twisted tales that came to light recently when someone asked people to "share the most insane thing your ex did." And if you think they're bad, wait 'til you read some of the others. All we can say is there's now proof that crazy comes packaged (or disguised) in all shapes and sizes.
Bored Panda has had a jaw-dropping read through all of the comments to select the ones that really made us question the human race. Some are a little unhinged, others are full-blown psychopath. All are a reminder that even when you think you know someone really well, they can always leave you wondering whether you actually ever knew them at all.
We also reveal how to tell if you're dating an actual psychopath. You'll find that info between the images...
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
He told me I wasn't allowed to use tampons because it's cheating
Ellinor she/they/elle 21 hours ago (edited)
First of all, your partner should never "allow" or "not allow" you to do anything, second of all he's an uneducated moron and unless he has a v@gina he shouldn't give his opinions on tampons.
Many of us associate psychopaths with terrifying monsters who make it into scary, true crime, Netflix documentaries. But the truth is, the majority of psychopaths aren’t actually criminals. They live fairly ordinary lives all around us, often hiding in plain sight. And there are more of them than you might think.
Here's the bad news: An estimated 1 in 100 people are psychopaths. To put it into perspective, that's similar to the number of people who are teachers in the U.K. So, statistically speaking, it's not that unlikely that one day, you might find yourself dating a psychopath. Or worse yet, marrying one.
If you want the good news, keep scrolling...
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#2
He got my best friend pregnant on our wedding night! She had a daughter. I was the Godmother. I had no idea it was my husband's baby for 10 years.
Ellinor she/they/elle 21 hours ago (edited)
I think you forgot the "ex" in front of best friend.
Let's start with what a psychopath is... According to Calli Tzani Pepelasi, a lecturer of investigative psychology at the University of Huddersfield in the U.K., most researchers agree that psychopathy involves "persistent antisocial behavior, impaired empathy and remorse, boldness, emotional resiliency, meanness, impulsivity and extremely egotistical traits."
But that doesn't make psychopaths all bad. Apparently, they also have certain positive traits, like paying attention to detail, being good at reading people, and engaging in conversation with ease. "Their ability to be precise and creative means psychopaths can be successful professionals," explains Pepelasi.
#3
My ex thought I was cheating on him. Why? Because google maps says the drive from home to work takes 15 minutes, and I was taking 17 minutes to get there. So he decided to "make sure I wasn't cheating" by coming to work with me and sitting in my car all day, for 2 months.
The expert says there are some red flags that scream "psychopath" in relationships. The first is that they're often pathological liars.
"Psychopaths are likely to repeatedly attempt to deceive their partners and will lie about anything under any circumstances in order to conceal their behavior and achieve their goals – whatever they may be," reveals Pepelasi.
That said, it's not always easy to catch them lying because they're so strategic in their planning of tall tales. "They often also tend to have a superficial charm that may have got their partner addicted in the first place – this could make their other half doubt their suspicions," the expert adds.
#4
He bought me ducks for my birthday because I’d always wanted ducks. Then he got his friend to shoot them all a few months later when he decided he didn’t like them. That’s definitely not the worst but about all I can say on here
#5
Sent me pictures of myself sleeping from before we got together 🧍 I should have listened to my mother when she told me not to date her 😭
Ellinor she/they/elle 21 hours ago
Yes, you should have. You should maybe also have called the police.
They're also apparently quite full of themselves. Or, put another way, their perception of self-worth is typically extremely high. The expert says even if you are a successful, confident professional, you are likely to feel worthless in comparison. "And if you don’t, a psychopath partner may set out to crush your self-esteem in order to have more control over you," Pepelasi warns.
Psychopaths are masters at gaslighting, too. They'll erode your confidence and sense of reality by confusing, misdirecting, deceiving, and persuading you, until eventually, you start to suffer from extreme self-doubt.
And there's a reason why psychopaths are so good at manipulating people. Find out what it is further down...
#6
Got concerningly jealous because I was spending too much time with my dog (I used to wfh), in addition the dog wasn’t eating one day so I put a splash of milk in his food (a fresh 4 pint bottle) and said that I had to go and buy the dog his own milk and that was his milk. Also he randomly decided to start taking my dog for walks every night for a few weeks, turns out he was taking him for a walk so he could call his other woman, while I was at home… 8 months pregnant with his baby… also looking after his 3 year old son… and sleeping on the living room room because he wouldn’t take no for an answer in bed.
These cunning men and women, as previously stated, are excellent at studying other people’s behavior and then using what they've learned to control them.
"If you are in a relationship with a psychopath and manage to resist their manipulation, they will often throw a toddler’s tantrum full of frustration, anger, nagging or repetitive conversations – and of course the pity puppy eyes as a final attempt – to make you feel sorry for them and give in to their wishes," says Pepelasi.
#7
Told me he was being deployed and instead of actually being deployed he was getting married.
#8
I worked at a restaurant and he wanted me to help him get a last minute catering order for a family event, but forgot I was out of town for the weekend. I felt so bad I couldn’t help until I found out the “family event” was his baby shower.
If you're waiting for an apology from your psychopath partner, don't hold your breath. They often have an astounding lack of guilt or remorse. And that's how it'll stay... Because research has shown that the brains of psychopaths are wired in this way.
"A recent brain scanning study of psychopaths in prison showed that the higher levels of psychopathy people had, the more likely they were to cheat – and not feel bad about it," writes Pepelasi. "Other studies have discovered that psychopaths have structural and functional differences in several brain areas, including the prefrontal cortex, which plays a crucial role in personality development and planning."
#9
Saw few lashes extensions on his duvet and he said it was bird feathers ☹️he lied to my face despite knowing I am a lash Tech ☹
Because of their cold behavior, you might think that psychopaths don't feel empathy. But apparently, that's not the case. They're just able to choose to disregard it, like an emotional off-switch. "Similarly, it seems psychopaths are often aware of the wrongfulness in their negative behavior, but act in that way in any case due to their lack of self-control," adds the expert.
#10
We dated for three months, I came to his house unannounced, I saw a family picture of him, wife and his two children on the wall, he told me it was his practical for AI class he took last month
#11
Cheated on me the night our daughter was born, in MY BED with MY NOW EX best friend and got her pregnant with a set of twins which she later secretly aborted anyway, then he cheated on HER and got someone else pregnant as well, while SHE was also still pregnant with the twins.
#12
he was bringing her into my apartment letting her steal my things while i was working two jobs every day. he slept with her in my bed multiple times, then popped the air mattress i slept on and robbed me. had the audacity to have his dad call me and ask for his cowboy boots back. i pissed in them and left them on the porch.
So what happens if or when you break up with a psychopath? They could feel genuinely sad or sorry. But not for the reasons you might think. Pepelasi believes their emotions are more to do with the fact that they are no longer able to own, control, or use you anymore.
Be warned... If you dump a psychopath and later change your mind and want to get back together, the joke's on you. "Their lack of empathy means that they will take no responsibility for what went wrong in the relationship and offer to change going forward," warns the expert. "Instead, they will most likely blame the outcome on you or anyone else but themselves."
And why's this? Because, says Pepelasi, in their mind, if you are feeling hurt, then it is your responsibility and your problem – in other words, you let this happen to you.
#13
Kicked me out of the house for cutting my hair without his permission
Ellinor she/they/elle 21 hours ago
Once again, a partner shouldn't have to give you "permission" or not.
#14
My father left my mother for her BEST FRIEND, that was literally HELPING PLAN THEIR WEDDING. I had been out in the world for a good year already. He knew about me. He just ran away from his responsibility like the big dump he is
#15
he actually introduced her as a cousin and had me cooking for them every weekend, while they watched movies 😆😅
#16
He also used to get really upset at me having a single drink, crying and yelling about how his family was alcoholic and he had trauma from it, and then would proceed to drink 6-8 beers at his friend's house, more than I have EVER drank in my life 💀
WindySwede 14 hours ago
He thought beer and then alcoholic drinks were two different things? Or just a jerk?
#17
Ex-husband forged my signature on loans, long after we were separated. Only knew when debit collection called. Went MIA & took 7 years to divorce him. Possessions taken including the car he loved more than me.
#18
said he was going to his friend's wedding in another state, but he actually went to his own wedding
#19
On Valentine’s Day he bought me chocolate as a gift 🎁 , he then sent me a picture of it and ate it.
Anne Roberts 19 hours ago
I had an ex who completely ignored me on Valentine's Day. The next day he told me he had bought and eaten two lobsters to celebrate for both of us. After I dumped him he had many, many other exes. Jerk
#20
He lied about stage 3/4 cancer for months, falsified documents and faked doctor visits (also got himself hospitalised for the same issue using the same fake documents- and the doctors found out and kicked him out of the hospital before a surgery he didnt need) and made my family feel sorry for him and transfer him 1000 euros (and he wants to become a priest and tried to convince me to marry him for that)
#21
he dumped me for not following the dotted lines when using the toilet paper
#22
He placed another ladies clothes in the fridge telling me it’s his neighbors cow meat so I should not touch it .
#23
My ex wrote me a letter in blood. He also asked if he could get me pregnant after I broke up with him. Said once I gave birth to sign all rights over to him and he would take care of the kid and never talk to me again. Because he was so desperate to love someone and them love him back…..
#24
he came to my place at the middle of the night barefoot to prove that he loves me then a week later he got married to someone else
Laserleader 17 hours ago (edited)
100% He was kicked out barefoot by his fiancé and just shacked at your place until she let him back.
#25
Took another girl out to dinner on our anniversary.
#26
He took his clothes off and slept on the street, blocking my driveway
Peripheral Visionary 20 hours ago
Makes it easier to run them over when they're already on the ground.
#27
Well he did cheat but then decided to join a dart team with one of his affair partners so they could throw darts together every Sunday to punish me for catching him cheating and I was still supposed to stay and raise a baby together.
#28
when we broke up he would come at my place at night and sleep on a tree just to see who im with😂😂😂
#29
After divorce ex-husband came to my dad and tried to convince that I’m insane, alcoholic, pills-addicted and violent to my kid. None of this is true btw.
#30
He took the girl he was cheating on me with to spain (WITH THE MONEY I PUT IN OUR VACATION FUND)
#31
After dating for more than a year, my ex ghosted me with no reason
Shark Lady 16 hours ago
This happened to me. To help me get over him.i would make up random scenarios for why he disappeared. E.g witness protection, an alien collecting data about the earth for a full year,
#32
Delayed our divorce with the excuses he did not have time for it because he had to arrange the funeral of his friend. He did not tell who it was. Turned out to be some who i was also friends with. So, did not bother to tell me who died, but effort in making sure i did not het to know about the funeral, used his dead friend as an excuse to not cooperate in the divorce.
#33
he came home drunk at 3 in the morning, found me in bed ,he poured water on me while I was sleeping 😭
#34
He almost moved to Montana with the girl he was cheating on me with, then asked me to come along to become his side chick, then when I said no he started losing it and asking how we can make our relationship work if I won't move to be in the same place as him (which is been doing already for the past 5 years)
#35
He came to my house at 2:30 am to see if I was with another man, he knocked and knocked called but I silenced my phone. Started shouting at my window that he will put surveillance on me, he went home when he was tired.
#36
He asked me to tell his girlfriend who came over unexpectedly that im his sister😢 😢
#37
Long distance relationship - bought a whole house with someone else while we were together. Moved in with her. When I would send him coffee or meals by Uber eats on his hard days to his old apartment because obviously I didn't know then that he had moved, he would pretend to receive it and tell me how great it tasted
#38
he got married while we were dating, I confronted him he said it's just an introduction is not wedding...... fast forward to when he found out I was dating someone else, he broke my bfs windscreen..... wereh sleep station that day... he said if I can not be with him, I can't be with someone else
Norfolk and good 20 hours ago
This one is scary because most men who k**l their ex do so because they think "if I can't have her, no-one will."
#39
He named his daughter after me and begged me to be the God mother
#40
Not mine, but my dad thought my mom was cheating just bc she wrote a “rip” comment under her dead grandad post
#41
I didn’t talk to him for days,he came to me saying he is bored and lonely asking for my friend’s number 😂😩
#42
He broke up with me after 1.5 years because my depression made him depressed. Like bro, same.
Nathaniel He/Him Cis-Het 21 hours ago
I get this one. You can get locked into depression with others.
#43
he doesn't sleep whenever I'm sleeping, I woke up in the middle of the night one-day and saw him looking straight into my eyes omo I was so scared 😫😭😭
Laserleader 17 hours ago
This sounds like the sleeper has an issue more than the bed partner insomniac who probably looked over when they heard the sleeper wake up.
#44
we had a fight then I left it was at night the guy had a guitar so he followed me until I got home he was playing the guitar all the way and singing
#45
As he left me,he insisted that I help him pack cause he doesn't know how,that I run all his unfinished business,that I top up his phone card,send him money, listen to him rage to me on the phone because his new life isn't going well, gaslight me.rewrite history,defend his friends with a passion, ever when I didn't attack them,insult me,come back briefly and use my body and confuse me further .....
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What do you think ?
Ellinor she/they/elle 21 hours ago (edited)
One of my ex thought that just because we weren't together anymore (we had broken up because we realised we weren't in love and were better as friends), that meant that he now didn't had to keep the secrets I had told him during our relationship. You will never read this but F you Mickael.
Pittsburgh rare 18 hours ago
Yeah, f**k you, Mickael. The awful exes club has your back 🙏
Load More Replies...
Tiffany 16 hours ago (edited)
In the 60s or 70s my dad chased his first wife into a police station and beat her there in the lobby. (They let him go.) He beat and r***d many women and any real jail time fell through the cracks. He once popped up in the back of the van as my mom was trying to take me away. We didn't know he was there. He went to the front and kept messing with the wheel as she was driving and screaming. We almost crashed. I was 4. My mom was self defeating and kept going back to him. I'd wait in the van when I was 5 for awhile. I begged her not to go in. She ended up running out screaming completely naked trying to run away. Once she fully left she just found men who were the same. She finally k****d one of them in self defense but in the end she committed s*****e a few years after. I was still a kid. My dad was a malignant narcissist. We're not all one thing. He was narcissistic at his core and sociopathic. Malignant. He was an inspector working in aerospace.
Ellinor she/they/elle 21 hours ago (edited)
One of my ex thought that just because we weren't together anymore (we had broken up because we realised we weren't in love and were better as friends), that meant that he now didn't had to keep the secrets I had told him during our relationship. You will never read this but F you Mickael.
Pittsburgh rare 18 hours ago
Yeah, f**k you, Mickael. The awful exes club has your back 🙏
Load More Replies... Tiffany 16 hours ago (edited)
In the 60s or 70s my dad chased his first wife into a police station and beat her there in the lobby. (They let him go.) He beat and r***d many women and any real jail time fell through the cracks. He once popped up in the back of the van as my mom was trying to take me away. We didn't know he was there. He went to the front and kept messing with the wheel as she was driving and screaming. We almost crashed. I was 4. My mom was self defeating and kept going back to him. I'd wait in the van when I was 5 for awhile. I begged her not to go in. She ended up running out screaming completely naked trying to run away. Once she fully left she just found men who were the same. She finally k****d one of them in self defense but in the end she committed s*****e a few years after. I was still a kid. My dad was a malignant narcissist. We're not all one thing. He was narcissistic at his core and sociopathic. Malignant. He was an inspector working in aerospace.
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