Girlfriend’s “Hot Mess Of A Sister” Attempts To Move Into Guy’s House Despite Him Strictly Saying “No”, So He Changes The Locks
Family can be both a blessing and a curse. It’s nice to have someone that knows you for so long that you are related by blood with and who will be in your life no matter what happens. But sometimes relationships in families aren’t that smooth because sharing blood doesn’t mean that you share the same values and outlook on life, however you feel stuck with them.
The same can be said about your significant other’s family, but redditor simpleguyy6 doesn’t think that people need to always be there for toxic family members. His girlfriend disagrees and they got into quite a huge fight when she went behind her boyfriend’s back and gave her sister a key to their house where she is not welcomed by the man.
More info: Reddit
Man is furious after he finds out his girlfriend gave a copy of his house key to her sister, so he changes the lock and doesn’t give the key to anyone
Image credits: Alper Çuğun (not the actual photo)
The Original Poster is a 27-year-old man who has been dating his girlfriend Ashton for 2 years. They live together in a house he owns, but simpleguy6 doesn’t charge his girlfriend rent as she is still finishing her master’s degree. They both agreed that the OP pays for the majority of the household expenses and Ashton would contribute to paying for the groceries, utilities and helping with some of the chores until she graduates.
While Ashton is getting higher education, her sister is a bit of a “hot mess” as the OP describes her. The sister, Anna, doesn’t get along with the rest of her family, she has two kids and they both have different dads, she has been divorced two times and never had a stable job for an extended period of time.
It seems that she doesn’t even want to pull herself together because all she does is complain about her life but doesn’t take action to change it.
Image credits: simpleguyy6
The OP and his girlfriend live in a house that only the boyfriend pays for, but they both agreed on that
Image credits: simpleguyy6
The OP has been helping her by giving rides and babysitting her children, but he is tired of it and gave up on her after she started dating a guy who didn’t even like kids. Not only was the OP against that man, but Ashton was as well, however, Anna didn’t listen to any advice they gave.
The man’s frustration is understandable because his help didn’t give any results in making Anna get her life in order. If the person themselves doesn’t take matters into their own hands, nobody can do that for them.
Turns out, OP’s and Ashton’s intuition didn’t betray them and Anna didn’t last long with the new guy. But the problem was that they were living together and when the couple broke up, Anna didn’t have anywhere to go, she didn’t have a job or money to start over, so she turned to Ashton.
Ashton couldn’t turn away from her sister not having a home, talked about it with simpleguyy6 and asked if Anna could live with them for a while, but the boyfriend protested immediately.
The girlfriend, Ashton, has a sister, Anna, who is a little bit all over the place and can’t seem to pull her life together
Image credits: simpleguyy6
First of all, he considered Anna to be a leech. He helped her plenty, but she didn’t use that help to get out of her difficult situation. Secondly, the OP doesn’t want children in his house because he works from home half of the time and 3 extra people in his space would not be ideal.
Ashton tried to convince him that this is the right thing to do, but the boyfriend was firm and agreed that they would help her by bringing her food but not sharing his home with her.
Anna broke up with her boyfriend that neither Ashton or OP approved of and she needed a place to live with her two children
Image credits: simpleguyy6
The conflict escalated as the girlfriend caught on when he took full ownership of the house even though they lived there together. His argument was that he was the one paying for the mortgage so until Ashton did that, she wouldn’t have a say in who can live in the house.
Some people in the comments also felt weird about the OP saying that it was his house only, so simpleguyy6 elaborated and said that it’s her home, but not her house: “It’s her home yes. But she doesn’t get to make real decisions on it till she has her skin in the game.” In another comment he said, “I don’t know if I plan on getting married to her yet or not. It’s not her house. Legally or in any way shape or form. If the house lit on fire tomorrow she’d have no financial obligation. So no, it’s not her house.”
Ashton asked her boyfriend if they could stay at their house, but the OP didn’t want to hear any of it
Image credits: simpleguyy6
But turns out that Ashton had given Anna the keys from his house months ago, so one day she just let herself in
Image credits: simpleguyy6
Because Ashton wasn’t able to talk the OP into welcoming Anna to his house, the sister called him to try it herself. She was unsuccessful and even got offended when simpleguyy6 suggested to her some organizations that could help her to find a roof over her head.
The man thought this was the end and made his stance clear but while he was at work, he saw Anna and her kids entering his house on his ring camera. She wasn’t accompanied by Ashton and had a bag on her shoulder.
The OP couldn’t understand how Anna managed to get in, so he asked Ashton what was going on. Turns out, Anna needed a place to stay for a few hours until her ex emptied the apartment, so she went to OP’s house because she had a key as Ashton had made her a copy months ago.
Finding out this information made simpleguyy6 very mad and he was about to call the police, but Ashton called Anna and told her to leave. The OP was so mad that he changed the locks on his house and didn’t give the new keys to Ashton. She needs to ask for access through the garage and this is the only way she will be able to get it until her sister finds a place to be.
Image credits: simpleguyy6
The OP was so furious and felt so betrayed that he changed the lock on the door and didn’t give the key to Ashton, who now has to request access through the garage
Image credits: simpleguyy6
He did that because he is afraid that one day he’ll come home and find his house occupied by a woman with two kids. However, he was called a jerk, so he second-guessed his actions. He offered an explanation to why he feels like that: “I feel like I’m being over controlling and it’s causing stress into my life and that makes me an AH to myself.”
People in the comments were concerned about Ashton making a copy of a key for someone that is clearly not welcome in their house behind OP’s back. They also believed that letting Anna stay at his house wouldn’t help her because people get comfortable with sitting on someone else’s neck, so it would have created even more problems.
What do you think? Do you sympathize with Anna and would have let her into your house along with her children? Or do you think that she lacks responsibility and you would be suspicious of her wanting to become a real adult with a stable income and home? Let us know your take on the situation in the comments!
Ashton and Anna think the OP is a jerk for the way he behaved, but other redditors thought the girlfriend’s behavior was questionable
The girlfriend seriously violated his trust by secretly giving her sister a house key to his house. You can't just go behind someone's back like that. Also, he's been helping her already, but there's a limit. Plus, if they'd let the girlfriend's sister in to stay, it's doubtful that she would have left. Then she'd be letting her sketchy boyfriends into his home, and who knows what they'd do. I understand that the girl wants to help her sister, but that wasn't the way to go about doing it.
Not to mention, if Anna refused to leave, he'd have to go to court and get her evicted. Meanwhile, she has access to his house and all his possessions? Nope. OP is NTA. I'd rethink the relationship too, given the seriousness of the betrayal of trust.
Load More Replies...The relationship might not work out, but I understand OP's position. I had to make a hard boundary with my sister because she will take everything she can and ask for more. When she realized she couldn'tget anything from me, she stopped talking to me.
I think they are both TAH. Yes, the girlfriend messed up. She should have never given her sister a copy of the key. But I am getting controlling vibes from this guy. Is everyone totally ignoring the red flags from this guy because his girlfriend made a mistake? First, it shouldn't matter if she doesn't pay the mortgage. They are in a long-term, live together relationship and should be making decisions together about their life. With his logic, every stay at home mom and dad should have no say about what goes on in their lives and house? BS! Also, he either needs to forgive her and work it out, or not and break up. But making her request access to her own home? He isn't her father and doesn't need to punish her.
If I had to get permission to enter my own home only through the garage, I would find a new home. She wasn’t right to give her sister a key, but her “punishment” is not right either.
Load More Replies...Yeah, I can't quite tell from hearing just one side of the story which member of the couple is being more unreasonable here, but either way, I have doubts about this relationship having much of a future. Changing the locks and making the girlfriend ask permission to enter the house that she lives in is pretty extreme--and has kind of a creepy/controlling vibe. As does the boyfriend playing the "you don't pay rent, so you don't have a say" card: the boyfriend is right that she has no business moving her relatives in when he is against it, but that's because moving additional people into a home you share as a couple should be a "two yesses" thing, not because he's the only one whose opinion matters. What I can't quite tell, from his side of the story is whether he's resorted to the nuclear option (changing the locks, etc.) because she has a pattern of trampling over his boundaries when he expresses them like a reasonable person--in which case he should dump her
Or if he just seethed silently about the sister situation until he (from the girlfriend's perspective) flew off the handle out of the blue--in which case she should dump him. Either way, they do not sound good for each other.
Load More Replies...OP is NTA. I understand gf is going for her master's, but she is living with him pretty much rent free. GF and sister are doing the same thing re living situations, but GF found a decent guy. OP may want to reevaluate that relationship. She was told no, has given a key without permission, etc. Bravo for the solid boundary and instant consequences.
Honestly, I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say he's kind of the a*****e. If her status in the relationship is based entirely on how much money she contributes, what would that mean if they had kids and she was a stay at home mom? What if she only makes 75% of what he does? Does she only get 37.5% of a vote on all household matters, instead of 50? I think his reasons for not wanting the sister there were legit, and for her to go behind his back like that was a serious breach of trust, so why did he have to devalue his girlfriend's place in their relationship by making it all about money? Everyone sucks here.
I think there is something to the fact that Ashton has zero skin in the game here that makes her behavior more appalling, but I do agree that a person's say in how a household is run shouldn't be apportioned by income. It should be a partnership. Though even if she was an equally contributing financial partner, or even contributing more, I do think that either partner should get veto power when it comes to moving someone in. Even then, I would think she was completely out of line giving her sister a key without OP's permission. I'm in a decades long legal marriage where we bought our house together. I would never do that to my partner and would be furious if they did that to me.
Load More Replies...Kick Ashton to the curb too. What a piece of crap gf. He can do so much better.
I have to wonder what the GF and sister thought was going to happen when he got home and found the sister and her kids there. Did they think he'd just say OK? GF sounds manipulative.
I think the 'access through garage' thing a bit over the top, but the a*****e? No, definitely not. He has good instincts. But family is family and the crazy sister will always be somewhere in his life in some way. I hope Ashton is worth it, otherwise.
I don't like this guy, I'm sorry, ya he sounds like kind of a judgemental Ahole
My husband and I were living in an apartment with my son. My sister needed a place to stay and I not only discussed it with my husband, I made it clear that his decision was final. He said yes, but after dealing with my sister's smartass mouthiness for 3 weeks, I'd had enough and kicked her out. She sobbed and cried, but I didn't appreciate being given attitude in my own home while my sister was living there free of charge. My husband backed me up. Even if she was contributing to the household, you don't go behind the other person's back and invite someone in when they've told you an absolute "No." Now Ashton destroyed trust between her and the OP. Good luck repairing that!
The sister is beyond salvage. 2 kids, different father, no job or stable relationship. Nothing about her life sounds normal. Not heeding a healthy advise proves that she is irredeemable. Burning bridges with family has its price. Now, the GF not only is backing the idiocy, but is trying to ensure that her healthy relationship is also poisoned due to matters of self-destructive behavior. I can see that the GF sister feels more entitled and sees her sister as a cushion for her mistakes. The OP should serious consider his relationship with the GF. The scales are weighing different now and the trust is gone. It's hard to build trust. Since financial angle is also present, it might turn real ugly later once married. It's not about gullibility anymore. Damage is done.
I think ESH...he's an a*****e because he expects his gf to turn her back on her family when she wants to help and Ashton if an a*****e for giving her sister a key to a house she doesn't own or even pay rent in. I think they're doomed because she clearly cannot set boundaries with her family and he is obviously a control freak.
I'm kinda thinking they're both TAH. Ashton should never have invited her sister into the house without the boyfriend's say so, she overstepped the line and went directly against her partner's wishes. However if they agreed as an adult couple that he would pay the bulk of the bills until she graduates but they would then take equal responsibility then it is unreasonable to "punish" Ashton by restricting access to her own home ? No. The "I pay all the bills so you get no say in the house" is a major red flag and I worry for Ashton that her whole life if going to be lived under the "my house my rules" policy. It's not uncommon to give a family member a key (though he should have been informed)
If he can't forgive her and regain trust the relationship is over. If he trusts her enough to continue living with her he should give her another chance. She messed up bad and hopefully apologized (I'm assuming she did since they are still together). I don't know how she could have not known that she should not make a key for someone without his position and I hope she learned her lesson. At this point though either he gives her another chance or they should break up.
Well, you are trying to walk a very fine line there...and good to you for trying...but it is too fine and is not going to work.
If OP stays with Ashton, he needs to be careful about how he frames their financial relationship after she starts paying more of the expenses. His house is currently his sole property. If she is paying "part of the mortgage" she may be able to assert some portion of ownership if/when they break up. If he's comfortable with that level of partnership, fine. If he's not, he needs to class this as a rental and have a rental agreement that is not based on his mortgage, taxes, etc. Any improvements should be out of his pocket.
ESH - you're treating your gf like a baby. GF shouldn't have given key out without your agreement. Changing the locks and giving GF the key would have been good and if she did it the 2nd time, drastic actions would have been appropriate. Additionally good on you for cutting sister out (regardless of why) she sounds like bad news with no boundaries. She isn't your problem at all. Poor kids, they don't stand a chance IMO
Everyone is Shitty here... of course you'd want to take your sister in, sometimes it takes a ridiculous amount of grief before you learn to stop trying to help people you love, and OP... your girlfriend has lived there 2 years... you have a billing agreement, it's her home too... you can't just lock her out of it. Y'all need to sit down a talk it out properly like adults, and not stop talking till you come to a compromise
So many boundaries and security are violated here despite being communicated well to the partner.
This is a classic case of ENTITLEMENT. Had a similar situation with my first wife. I would share with her because she was my wife. She would share with her friends because she didn't have to pay for any of the things she was sharing.
Dump Ashton. She did this when you are just living together in YOUR house! Can you imagine if you marry? If you do choose to stay with her you better make damn sure you are not living in a community property state or YOUR house will no longer be just YOURS. As long as her sister is alive you CANNOT marry Ashton. Better to end it now and protect your financial future.
ESH. because there are several issues going on. ashton should never have given a key to her sister so in that she was the AH. then, after her boyfriend made it very clear that he did not want her there she still allowed her to come in. as for the boyfriend, well, i would start thinking about the dynamics as a whole. he is fine w/her chipping in b/c of her studies but he makes it quite clear that as long as he is footing more than half then it's his way or the highway. once she starts to work there shoulld be a big discussion on how things will work or she may find herself needing a place to stay if he pulls the 'my name is on the mortgage' after an argument.
Holy s**t. This guy is a keeper - not. What a creep. Not about the sister - yeah, I would have done the same - but they way he did that to the girlfriend? Is she his boarder or a his partner. Relationships should not be placed on how much money you pay for your shared accommodation. What would happen if they had kids? Would he deny her a key because she didn't cook him dinner when he got home. This guy throws up all the red flags. He's definitely TAH and she needs to leave before she becomes too financially reliant on him.
completelly agree. He does not value her plain and simple. Ashton deserves better, maybe less income but respect is invaluable.
Load More Replies...That's a huge red flag omg When I moved in to my place my landlord was fine with me copying the keys so I asked if my boyfriend wanted a set his immediate response was no that's your space I'm not being a home invader if I want to come over I'll ask.
My SIL is the same way. And a nightmare in some other ways too. She put makeup on my daughter(4yo), which she knows I'm against, and wouldn't stop when I told her to. Allergies to cosmetics run in my family, I told her this, and her response was "well nothing happened so you're just over reacting" I grabbed my daughter, took her home, and told my wife she is not allowed near SIL again. I'm not one for making decisions without talking about it with my wife first, but if she thinks that Aunt > Dad well that means going no contact to me.
You're ridiculous. She's never allowed near her aunt again because you're against makeup? You're pathetic, and you have no right to dictate who your kid can be around - because she's not just your kid.
Load More Replies...Ashton wasn't there. Sis was just letting herself in.
Load More Replies...He sounds like he’s tired of dealing with the sisters b******t. And he didn’t blame her for the divorce. . You get tired of helping a leach and will eventually start to judge them. Some people have a hard time in life because they make it hard for themselves.
Load More Replies...She had her own key; she doesn't have the right to make a copy and give to someone else against her partner's (and homeowner's wishes).
Load More Replies...1. You and your husband let your brother stay with you. OP specifically said no. 2. She may want to help, but she shouldn't be going against her partner in doing so, especially when it's his house. 3. OP have contacts to organizations that could help, and if this is in the US, there are A LOT of programs to assist, including emergency cash assistance.
Load More Replies...I'm 95% sure, if the guy let his girlfriends' sister and kids living in his house, they would never leave, unless he literally throwing them out, which would end also his relationship. Remember, they are not a married couple, just two people dating for only 2 years. His girlfriends' sister is no family for him. Maybe they'll never marry, and break up in the following years... giving their age, is very possible. So, why would he treat a quasi stranger as family?
Load More Replies...The girlfriend seriously violated his trust by secretly giving her sister a house key to his house. You can't just go behind someone's back like that. Also, he's been helping her already, but there's a limit. Plus, if they'd let the girlfriend's sister in to stay, it's doubtful that she would have left. Then she'd be letting her sketchy boyfriends into his home, and who knows what they'd do. I understand that the girl wants to help her sister, but that wasn't the way to go about doing it.
Not to mention, if Anna refused to leave, he'd have to go to court and get her evicted. Meanwhile, she has access to his house and all his possessions? Nope. OP is NTA. I'd rethink the relationship too, given the seriousness of the betrayal of trust.
Load More Replies...The relationship might not work out, but I understand OP's position. I had to make a hard boundary with my sister because she will take everything she can and ask for more. When she realized she couldn'tget anything from me, she stopped talking to me.
I think they are both TAH. Yes, the girlfriend messed up. She should have never given her sister a copy of the key. But I am getting controlling vibes from this guy. Is everyone totally ignoring the red flags from this guy because his girlfriend made a mistake? First, it shouldn't matter if she doesn't pay the mortgage. They are in a long-term, live together relationship and should be making decisions together about their life. With his logic, every stay at home mom and dad should have no say about what goes on in their lives and house? BS! Also, he either needs to forgive her and work it out, or not and break up. But making her request access to her own home? He isn't her father and doesn't need to punish her.
If I had to get permission to enter my own home only through the garage, I would find a new home. She wasn’t right to give her sister a key, but her “punishment” is not right either.
Load More Replies...Yeah, I can't quite tell from hearing just one side of the story which member of the couple is being more unreasonable here, but either way, I have doubts about this relationship having much of a future. Changing the locks and making the girlfriend ask permission to enter the house that she lives in is pretty extreme--and has kind of a creepy/controlling vibe. As does the boyfriend playing the "you don't pay rent, so you don't have a say" card: the boyfriend is right that she has no business moving her relatives in when he is against it, but that's because moving additional people into a home you share as a couple should be a "two yesses" thing, not because he's the only one whose opinion matters. What I can't quite tell, from his side of the story is whether he's resorted to the nuclear option (changing the locks, etc.) because she has a pattern of trampling over his boundaries when he expresses them like a reasonable person--in which case he should dump her
Or if he just seethed silently about the sister situation until he (from the girlfriend's perspective) flew off the handle out of the blue--in which case she should dump him. Either way, they do not sound good for each other.
Load More Replies...OP is NTA. I understand gf is going for her master's, but she is living with him pretty much rent free. GF and sister are doing the same thing re living situations, but GF found a decent guy. OP may want to reevaluate that relationship. She was told no, has given a key without permission, etc. Bravo for the solid boundary and instant consequences.
Honestly, I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say he's kind of the a*****e. If her status in the relationship is based entirely on how much money she contributes, what would that mean if they had kids and she was a stay at home mom? What if she only makes 75% of what he does? Does she only get 37.5% of a vote on all household matters, instead of 50? I think his reasons for not wanting the sister there were legit, and for her to go behind his back like that was a serious breach of trust, so why did he have to devalue his girlfriend's place in their relationship by making it all about money? Everyone sucks here.
I think there is something to the fact that Ashton has zero skin in the game here that makes her behavior more appalling, but I do agree that a person's say in how a household is run shouldn't be apportioned by income. It should be a partnership. Though even if she was an equally contributing financial partner, or even contributing more, I do think that either partner should get veto power when it comes to moving someone in. Even then, I would think she was completely out of line giving her sister a key without OP's permission. I'm in a decades long legal marriage where we bought our house together. I would never do that to my partner and would be furious if they did that to me.
Load More Replies...Kick Ashton to the curb too. What a piece of crap gf. He can do so much better.
I have to wonder what the GF and sister thought was going to happen when he got home and found the sister and her kids there. Did they think he'd just say OK? GF sounds manipulative.
I think the 'access through garage' thing a bit over the top, but the a*****e? No, definitely not. He has good instincts. But family is family and the crazy sister will always be somewhere in his life in some way. I hope Ashton is worth it, otherwise.
I don't like this guy, I'm sorry, ya he sounds like kind of a judgemental Ahole
My husband and I were living in an apartment with my son. My sister needed a place to stay and I not only discussed it with my husband, I made it clear that his decision was final. He said yes, but after dealing with my sister's smartass mouthiness for 3 weeks, I'd had enough and kicked her out. She sobbed and cried, but I didn't appreciate being given attitude in my own home while my sister was living there free of charge. My husband backed me up. Even if she was contributing to the household, you don't go behind the other person's back and invite someone in when they've told you an absolute "No." Now Ashton destroyed trust between her and the OP. Good luck repairing that!
The sister is beyond salvage. 2 kids, different father, no job or stable relationship. Nothing about her life sounds normal. Not heeding a healthy advise proves that she is irredeemable. Burning bridges with family has its price. Now, the GF not only is backing the idiocy, but is trying to ensure that her healthy relationship is also poisoned due to matters of self-destructive behavior. I can see that the GF sister feels more entitled and sees her sister as a cushion for her mistakes. The OP should serious consider his relationship with the GF. The scales are weighing different now and the trust is gone. It's hard to build trust. Since financial angle is also present, it might turn real ugly later once married. It's not about gullibility anymore. Damage is done.
I think ESH...he's an a*****e because he expects his gf to turn her back on her family when she wants to help and Ashton if an a*****e for giving her sister a key to a house she doesn't own or even pay rent in. I think they're doomed because she clearly cannot set boundaries with her family and he is obviously a control freak.
I'm kinda thinking they're both TAH. Ashton should never have invited her sister into the house without the boyfriend's say so, she overstepped the line and went directly against her partner's wishes. However if they agreed as an adult couple that he would pay the bulk of the bills until she graduates but they would then take equal responsibility then it is unreasonable to "punish" Ashton by restricting access to her own home ? No. The "I pay all the bills so you get no say in the house" is a major red flag and I worry for Ashton that her whole life if going to be lived under the "my house my rules" policy. It's not uncommon to give a family member a key (though he should have been informed)
If he can't forgive her and regain trust the relationship is over. If he trusts her enough to continue living with her he should give her another chance. She messed up bad and hopefully apologized (I'm assuming she did since they are still together). I don't know how she could have not known that she should not make a key for someone without his position and I hope she learned her lesson. At this point though either he gives her another chance or they should break up.
Well, you are trying to walk a very fine line there...and good to you for trying...but it is too fine and is not going to work.
If OP stays with Ashton, he needs to be careful about how he frames their financial relationship after she starts paying more of the expenses. His house is currently his sole property. If she is paying "part of the mortgage" she may be able to assert some portion of ownership if/when they break up. If he's comfortable with that level of partnership, fine. If he's not, he needs to class this as a rental and have a rental agreement that is not based on his mortgage, taxes, etc. Any improvements should be out of his pocket.
ESH - you're treating your gf like a baby. GF shouldn't have given key out without your agreement. Changing the locks and giving GF the key would have been good and if she did it the 2nd time, drastic actions would have been appropriate. Additionally good on you for cutting sister out (regardless of why) she sounds like bad news with no boundaries. She isn't your problem at all. Poor kids, they don't stand a chance IMO
Everyone is Shitty here... of course you'd want to take your sister in, sometimes it takes a ridiculous amount of grief before you learn to stop trying to help people you love, and OP... your girlfriend has lived there 2 years... you have a billing agreement, it's her home too... you can't just lock her out of it. Y'all need to sit down a talk it out properly like adults, and not stop talking till you come to a compromise
So many boundaries and security are violated here despite being communicated well to the partner.
This is a classic case of ENTITLEMENT. Had a similar situation with my first wife. I would share with her because she was my wife. She would share with her friends because she didn't have to pay for any of the things she was sharing.
Dump Ashton. She did this when you are just living together in YOUR house! Can you imagine if you marry? If you do choose to stay with her you better make damn sure you are not living in a community property state or YOUR house will no longer be just YOURS. As long as her sister is alive you CANNOT marry Ashton. Better to end it now and protect your financial future.
ESH. because there are several issues going on. ashton should never have given a key to her sister so in that she was the AH. then, after her boyfriend made it very clear that he did not want her there she still allowed her to come in. as for the boyfriend, well, i would start thinking about the dynamics as a whole. he is fine w/her chipping in b/c of her studies but he makes it quite clear that as long as he is footing more than half then it's his way or the highway. once she starts to work there shoulld be a big discussion on how things will work or she may find herself needing a place to stay if he pulls the 'my name is on the mortgage' after an argument.
Holy s**t. This guy is a keeper - not. What a creep. Not about the sister - yeah, I would have done the same - but they way he did that to the girlfriend? Is she his boarder or a his partner. Relationships should not be placed on how much money you pay for your shared accommodation. What would happen if they had kids? Would he deny her a key because she didn't cook him dinner when he got home. This guy throws up all the red flags. He's definitely TAH and she needs to leave before she becomes too financially reliant on him.
completelly agree. He does not value her plain and simple. Ashton deserves better, maybe less income but respect is invaluable.
Load More Replies...That's a huge red flag omg When I moved in to my place my landlord was fine with me copying the keys so I asked if my boyfriend wanted a set his immediate response was no that's your space I'm not being a home invader if I want to come over I'll ask.
My SIL is the same way. And a nightmare in some other ways too. She put makeup on my daughter(4yo), which she knows I'm against, and wouldn't stop when I told her to. Allergies to cosmetics run in my family, I told her this, and her response was "well nothing happened so you're just over reacting" I grabbed my daughter, took her home, and told my wife she is not allowed near SIL again. I'm not one for making decisions without talking about it with my wife first, but if she thinks that Aunt > Dad well that means going no contact to me.
You're ridiculous. She's never allowed near her aunt again because you're against makeup? You're pathetic, and you have no right to dictate who your kid can be around - because she's not just your kid.
Load More Replies...Ashton wasn't there. Sis was just letting herself in.
Load More Replies...He sounds like he’s tired of dealing with the sisters b******t. And he didn’t blame her for the divorce. . You get tired of helping a leach and will eventually start to judge them. Some people have a hard time in life because they make it hard for themselves.
Load More Replies...She had her own key; she doesn't have the right to make a copy and give to someone else against her partner's (and homeowner's wishes).
Load More Replies...1. You and your husband let your brother stay with you. OP specifically said no. 2. She may want to help, but she shouldn't be going against her partner in doing so, especially when it's his house. 3. OP have contacts to organizations that could help, and if this is in the US, there are A LOT of programs to assist, including emergency cash assistance.
Load More Replies...I'm 95% sure, if the guy let his girlfriends' sister and kids living in his house, they would never leave, unless he literally throwing them out, which would end also his relationship. Remember, they are not a married couple, just two people dating for only 2 years. His girlfriends' sister is no family for him. Maybe they'll never marry, and break up in the following years... giving their age, is very possible. So, why would he treat a quasi stranger as family?
Load More Replies...
145
78