A wedding during the COVID-19 era looks different. So does its preparation. Couples have to follow the news closely and maintain an open conversation with their vendors and guests. Navigating everything is exhausting. And some people just can’t catch a break. Reddit user u/Jolly_3772 is one of them.

She and her partner had to cancel their wedding twice during the pandemic. And when things finally were looking good for her, a new problem arose, in person. Her mother-in-law. Not only did the lady completely hijack the planning of the big day, but she also made u/Jolly_3772’s fiancé think his bride began turning into a bridezilla. Not knowing what to make of it and how to react, u/Jolly_3772 turned to the subreddit r/AmItheA**hole, explaining the entire situation and asking for advice.

Image credits: Samantha Gades (not the actual photo)

Image credits: Jolly_3772

Wedding planner Lisa Burton, who has over 14 years of experience throwing weddings abroad, thinks that brides and grooms need as much understanding and empathy as one can muster during these difficult times. “Last year during COVID has been one of the most stressful we’ve ever experienced as a world, can you even imagine planning a wedding in the midst of all this? Some of my couples have now postponed their wedding twice,” Burton told Bored Panda. “Hopes and dreams are being crushed and emotions are raw. Remember, this is supposed to be one of the most joyous times of the couple’s lives so if they want something that you are not fully onboard with I suggest holding your breath and keeping your thoughts to yourself. After all, it’s the couples’ day.”

Burton said that stories like this one are fairly common. “Unfortunately, this happens more than you’d imagine,” she said. “We see a lot of moms thinking the day is as much about them as it is about the bride. They can overstep boundaries and try to influence the bride and groom into doing something they’re not happy with.”

It’s good to have someone by your side when this happens. Someone who has experience in resolving these conflicts. As a wedding planner, Lisa wears many hats. Along with planning, she’s the source of advice when the couple is struggling to balance difficult family dynamics. “I’m a shoulder to cry on in stressful times and sometimes I even do a bit of light counseling if you can call it that,” she explained.

“In general, my couples are strong and confident and their weddings are self-financed, but even then there have been occasions where I’ve had to work with them to get them to assert their confidence and plan the day that they want and not the day their parents want!”

Let’s hope that u/Jolly_3772 finds a way out.

People think the mother-in-law is way out of line