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Someone On Tumblr Calculated How Much Communion Wafer Makes Up A Whole Jesus And It Will Crack You Up
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Funny4 years ago

Someone On Tumblr Calculated How Much Communion Wafer Makes Up A Whole Jesus And It Will Crack You Up

It’s common knowledge that during church services, Christians eat a piece of bread that symbolizes Jesus’ body and take a sip of wine which is a symbol of his blood. And there are definitely a few people who thought to themselves “so how many of those you have to consume before you’ve eaten a whole Jesus?” If you haven’t thought about it before, you probably are thinking about it now. Fortunately, Tumblr user ralfmaximus has the answer. They used their excellent arithmetic skills and came up with an answer. Scroll below to see it for yourself!

It’s common knowledge that during church services, Christians eat a piece of bread that symbolizes Jesus’ body and take a sip of wine which is a symbol of his blood

There are definitely a few people who thought this to themselves

Fortunately, Tumblr user used their excellent arithmetic skills and came up with an answer

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Hey pandas, what do you think?
Pamela24
Community Member
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I love how scientific the responses are. Especially because it's a reply to a religious question (sort of).

Caridina Japonica
Community Member
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Actually, the mass density of wine is between 0.99 and 1.05. Therefore we talk about 4500ml wine for $33 and 45.5kg wafers (182000 pcs) for $2730. That makes $2766 per corpse (sorry, couldn' resist). Considering the fact that there are 60000 seats in St.Peters Basilica in Rome, one Jesus sums up to 3 full house sundays. Maybe that's where all the donations go...

Krishna Chandra Singh Sanger
Community Member
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

How many Jesus (or will it be Jesuses) have been eaten by the Christians since this practice of communion was foisted upon their followers by the various churches all over the globe?

Brianna Fournier
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My friend Dallas just did the math, it's 466433.639923 Jesuses

Load More Replies...
Bobbi Newell
Community Member
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The phrase "Jesus load" alone was worth reading the article!

Joe Clark
Community Member
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think it would have been more accurate to use the caloric content of the wafers rather than the weight. If you are going to do a fair comparison, then you need to consider nutrition and not just weight.

Issey
Community Member
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

And from what we can read about Jesus in the bible he would have found this hilarious.

RJ Oliver
Community Member
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have just learnt that Jesus would've looked up to me.... how strange.

Jo Choto
Community Member
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Some people have too much time on their hands. (I suspect I might be one of those people!)

Stille20
Community Member
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm not offended... it's just an incredibly stupid exercise. If people were thinking "how many do you need to eat to equal Jesus", then they missed the concept. .

Stacy
Community Member
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

A kid asked the question. From a kids point of view, it is a legitimate question.

Load More Replies...
Mary Poole
Community Member
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You're all going to hell.

James Grey
Community Member
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What our brains are capable of always astounds me. And the fact that this question came from a child...kids should run the world. It would definitely be a much better place.

Lauren Kaufmann
Community Member
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I mean, if you're going based on catholic belief, the smallest particle of a consecrated wafer has just as much Jesus in it as a giant mega consecrated wafer, but this is p rad too lol

Nikki D
Community Member
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I've never heard that men in biblical times were 5'1", I'd need some proof or a citation on that. Anyone else ever hear of that?

John Kamau
Community Member
4 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

"To eat the WHOLE JESUS"... That Killed It.... Hahahahahaha

nadine blanchette
Community Member
4 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Funny you should ask... https://www.gocomics.com/saturday-morning-breakfast-cereal/2018/08/25

Vincent Jay
Community Member
4 years ago (edited)

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

I'm uncomfortable with this question. It seems blasphemous to me.

Sparrow17
Community Member
4 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

This did not crack me up, it made me sad.I deleted my BP account before as I got fed up with the swearing and judgemental posts;I will delete it again after this comment.Then probably not come back even as an observer.Free speech is one thing, but this is just Christian-bashing.Somehow we have reached a state where the same people who recognise it's not okay to bash people for their sexual orientation, culture or disability status, are also those who appear to delight in making horrible, degrading comments about Christianity and God.It's not okay people.You can't justify it on the basis of free speech,"humour"(it's not funny),or even the supposed argument that since religion has caused human suffering, it "needs"to be bashed (how does that solve the problem, and Christianity has done a lot more good than harm).The irony is, it's for people like this,while still doing these things and laughing about it,that Jesus spread out his arms on the Cross and said "I love you THIS MUCH".Your move

Ellen Stanley
Community Member
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It must be frightening to live with such a humorless mind.

Load More Replies...
Night Owl
Community Member
4 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

This comment has been deleted.

Kiahna
Community Member
4 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

This comment has been deleted.

Load More Replies...
Pamela24
Community Member
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I love how scientific the responses are. Especially because it's a reply to a religious question (sort of).

Caridina Japonica
Community Member
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Actually, the mass density of wine is between 0.99 and 1.05. Therefore we talk about 4500ml wine for $33 and 45.5kg wafers (182000 pcs) for $2730. That makes $2766 per corpse (sorry, couldn' resist). Considering the fact that there are 60000 seats in St.Peters Basilica in Rome, one Jesus sums up to 3 full house sundays. Maybe that's where all the donations go...

Krishna Chandra Singh Sanger
Community Member
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

How many Jesus (or will it be Jesuses) have been eaten by the Christians since this practice of communion was foisted upon their followers by the various churches all over the globe?

Brianna Fournier
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My friend Dallas just did the math, it's 466433.639923 Jesuses

Load More Replies...
Bobbi Newell
Community Member
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The phrase "Jesus load" alone was worth reading the article!

Joe Clark
Community Member
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think it would have been more accurate to use the caloric content of the wafers rather than the weight. If you are going to do a fair comparison, then you need to consider nutrition and not just weight.

Issey
Community Member
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

And from what we can read about Jesus in the bible he would have found this hilarious.

RJ Oliver
Community Member
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have just learnt that Jesus would've looked up to me.... how strange.

Jo Choto
Community Member
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Some people have too much time on their hands. (I suspect I might be one of those people!)

Stille20
Community Member
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm not offended... it's just an incredibly stupid exercise. If people were thinking "how many do you need to eat to equal Jesus", then they missed the concept. .

Stacy
Community Member
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

A kid asked the question. From a kids point of view, it is a legitimate question.

Load More Replies...
Mary Poole
Community Member
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You're all going to hell.

James Grey
Community Member
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What our brains are capable of always astounds me. And the fact that this question came from a child...kids should run the world. It would definitely be a much better place.

Lauren Kaufmann
Community Member
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I mean, if you're going based on catholic belief, the smallest particle of a consecrated wafer has just as much Jesus in it as a giant mega consecrated wafer, but this is p rad too lol

Nikki D
Community Member
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I've never heard that men in biblical times were 5'1", I'd need some proof or a citation on that. Anyone else ever hear of that?

John Kamau
Community Member
4 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

"To eat the WHOLE JESUS"... That Killed It.... Hahahahahaha

nadine blanchette
Community Member
4 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Funny you should ask... https://www.gocomics.com/saturday-morning-breakfast-cereal/2018/08/25

Vincent Jay
Community Member
4 years ago (edited)

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

I'm uncomfortable with this question. It seems blasphemous to me.

Sparrow17
Community Member
4 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

This did not crack me up, it made me sad.I deleted my BP account before as I got fed up with the swearing and judgemental posts;I will delete it again after this comment.Then probably not come back even as an observer.Free speech is one thing, but this is just Christian-bashing.Somehow we have reached a state where the same people who recognise it's not okay to bash people for their sexual orientation, culture or disability status, are also those who appear to delight in making horrible, degrading comments about Christianity and God.It's not okay people.You can't justify it on the basis of free speech,"humour"(it's not funny),or even the supposed argument that since religion has caused human suffering, it "needs"to be bashed (how does that solve the problem, and Christianity has done a lot more good than harm).The irony is, it's for people like this,while still doing these things and laughing about it,that Jesus spread out his arms on the Cross and said "I love you THIS MUCH".Your move

Ellen Stanley
Community Member
4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It must be frightening to live with such a humorless mind.

Load More Replies...
Night Owl
Community Member
4 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

This comment has been deleted.

Kiahna
Community Member
4 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

This comment has been deleted.

Load More Replies...
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