Woman Is Furious After Her Expensive Dinner Gets “Ruined” By Toddlers, Proposes A New Policy To Deal With Chaotic Children
Going out to a nice restaurant is supposed to be a treat. An evening to taste different meals, drink some quality wine, have pleasant conversations, and find more joy in daily living. This time should be spent bonding with yourself, a friend, or a loved one in a welcoming environment. Most importantly, you should not have to worry about anything — unless deciding what to get for dessert counts.
But sometimes, things get tricky, and your fancy dinner gets disrupted. This is exactly what happened to one woman who recently shared on Mumsnet that her fine dining experience was anything but relaxing. “We paid a lot of money for a meal we couldn’t enjoy,” she wrote while expressing anger about a family of five seated next to her.
As the kids at the next table were being loud and bashed their cutlery against the table, the woman felt she had to complain. What followed got her a free bottle of wine but turned into a heated online debate where people were eager to weigh in on the matter. Below, you can read the story in full and decide for yourself whether she was being unreasonable or not. Then be sure to let us know what you think about this whole ordeal in the comments.
This woman recently shared how a family with three children seated at the next table “ruined” her fancy meal out
Image credits: Nicolás Villalobos
She reached out to the internet to gain some perspective on the situation, sparking a debate online
Image credits: Ron Lach
Image credits: Arbesque
After making a complaint and getting a free bottle of wine, it seems like the woman still wanted more. The claim that expensive restaurants should have a policy on noisy children sparked a series of conversations in the comments. Some people said it was unreasonable, while others sympathized with her concerns.
A 2019 study conducted by Caterer.com surveyed over 1,000 UK parents with children between the ages of 0 and 14, 700 UK children between the ages of 5 and 14, and 105 restaurant managers and decision-makers. When it comes to new parents, half said they research online to make sure their chosen restaurant is child friendly.
Moreover, they are the most conscious of their kids’ impact on other diners: 45% reported feeling pressure for their little ones to behave. One respondent even noted the feeling of “being looked at because children are not silent.”
For parents of 5 to 7-year-olds, behavior is still a major concern. “Being served quickly, to avoid tantrums, is crucial. But these parents also value a good restaurant experience as a way to teach their children about the world.”
“Restaurants need to take the worry out of the eating experience,” Miranda Godfrey, a Senior Lecturer for Escoffier Grand Diploma Course at Westminster Kingsway College, said. “As a first step, they should have an area specifically for families that is near a changing facility and toilet. Good changing areas that provide wipes, creams, and clean changing mats with disposable sheets to place your baby on would be welcome — and let’s make sure this is accessible for dads too!”
The survey also found that families are vital for the dining business, as they make up 57% of restaurants’ revenue. Eating out is great for the kids too, as these little munchkins tend to absorb new experiences like sponges. The more activities they endeavor, the food they taste, and the new places they discover, the more they learn about their surroundings.
Young children, however, are still learning the art of self-control and etiquette, so these experiences often come as a challenge. But if you pick up a few tips and tricks and prepare beforehand, they don’t have to be.
“Kids are awesome and they should be part of the dining experience,” Sam Sifton, Food Editor for The New York Times told Fatherly. “Anytime we go to a restaurant, we are entering into a social contract with everyone else in the restaurant. I’m not trying to ruin your good time, and you’re not trying to ruin mine. It’s important to model that behavior, so kids can accept the social contract and have a good time.”
Firstly, he suggested that having confidence is key. “I always went in with a positive attitude that everything was going to work out well and be fun and exciting,” he said. But what’s even more important than having trust in yourself and your kids is being a model for manners.
Sifton pointed out that most of the time when he observed kids in the dining room acting out, it wasn’t their fault. “I’ve inwardly rolled my eyes at the sight of children coming into a restaurant and thought, ‘Oh boy, how is this going to go?’ But mainly, I’ve been pleasantly surprised.”
“When I’ve been annoyed by behavior, it’s generally the parents. You need to teach the kid how to be in the restaurant. This experience is different from eating at home. It’s more formal. It demands manners that we sometimes forget. That pays dividends down the line.”
At the end of the day, it’s up to the family to ensure both they and the other diners have a lovely time eating out. What are your thoughts about the situation? Do you think it’s reasonable to demand restaurants put policies in place to handle noisy kids? What can restaurants do to ensure everyone has an overall pleasant experience? We’d love to hear your thoughts on the matter down below.
After reading the post, some people sympathized with the woman and said her concerns were valid
And other users pointed out she was being unreasonable
The parents were the assholes. Obviously, they cannot control their kids. If you can't control your kids then it's your responsibility to not make them a problem for everyone else, especially at a nice place. Hire a babysitter if you must eat in the late evening or go to a kid friendly restaurant. Honestly, I'm so sick and tired of non-disciplinary and entitled parents that can't control their kids in public like the ones described here. My ex's family was like that. For rehearsal dinner we booked a nice restaurant and they were loud as hell. I was embarrassed and I apologized to every diner at the restaurant.
If my children misbehaved I asked for the food to be packed up and we would leave. Hard for many super permissive parents to realize I have zero desire to be around your children and especially not to pay hundreds of dollars to eat while someone's kids screech. Its common courtesy not rocket science.v
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There are plenty of moderate priced, family restaurants that you can bring your kids to to train them in polite restaurant behavior. Personally I expect to see kids at Dennys or iHop but not at an expensive restaurant unless they are as well behaved as most adults. I agree with the OP.
Absolutely agreed on the “training” part. Recently took my stepdaughter (and bf’s family) to out fine arts museum, let her bring a stuffed animal so she kept her hands to herself. It worked great! She was a little bored, but she needs to learn how to behave in adult spaces. And when we got home she spent the rest of the day coloring and making art to hang on our walls, win-win!
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I expect parents to make an effort to keep their kids quiet and especially that the kids don’t run around the restaurant. When my child was small, we took turns taking her outside for little breaks before she was bored.
Our kids knew that their butts were forbidden from leaving their seats. They knew if we had to have a private moment in the restroom that they wouldnt be happy and neither would I. If we needed some fresh air for a few minutes myself or my husband would take them out. We also knew that a 2 hour dinner would not work for us unless we had a sitter. You cant expect a kid to sit that long being bored.
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I despise parents who think that dealing with their obnoxious kids is something everyone should have to put up with. "So the parents don't deserve a night out?" If they can't control their kids, and allow them to ruin everyone else's night? No, they don't. Maybe some of the people in that restaurant were taking a night away from their own kids. Maybe some of the people there had saved up for a special night out. Just because these parents decided to raw dog a few years ago doesn't mean that everyone has to deal with the consequences.
Exactly. They don't need to eat out at the expense of others. They should keep their selfish entitled selves and annoying kids at home for dinner. The restaurant owners vare some of the responsibility for not banning them outright.
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If you have enough money to go to an expensive restaurant, you have enough money to hire a babysitter.
True that Matthew! Pple are cheap though... When it comes to a babysitter sometimes.
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Children aren't the problem here; lack of proper parenting is the problem. If you can't ensure your children will behave, you have no business ruining other people's meals. And an expensive restaurant is not the place to begin teaching children how to behave in public.
If they let the children in, it probably wasn’t that expensive of a restaurant. But the parents should make the children listen. We had 5 children in 8 years, and almost always took them out with us. They sat and were well behaved! We always receive compliments on their politeness. But they always were expected to do it at home also. Children just do what they are allowed to.
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Lol the only people mad about what OP said are the people who are guilty of doing this s**t too. "The kids don't deserve a good meal" ....... what fucken child gives a s**t about the quality of food? Especially at that age. Get a babysitter or YOU stay home! It's not our problem that you had children & you can't control them at a fancy restaurant at 8pm when there's generally adults looking to have an adult night. Like... you had children. I didn't. These children were being unreasonably obnoxious. Take your kids to a casual restaurant. Don't force your poorly behaved crotch goblins onto people who are paying good money for good food that they actually appreciate. Like... ugh. I'm sorry but entitled parents are the worst. Why is it that half the ppl who have kids think that they're entitled to more of the world than the rest? Or as if they're allowed to get away with s**t the rest can't? If you're an entitled parent. I don't. Like. You.
Mostly agree with you, but no.....DO NOT TAKE THEM TO ANY RESTRAUNT.....GO HOME! TRAIN YOUR KIDS AT HOME!
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I think certain places are not made for children. If you have young children, take them to a more family-friendly restaurant. I don't care if it's a child or a grown adult causing a commotion, they should be asked to leave. To pay a large sum of money for a nice night out and have to sit there with a screaming kid (or adult) is not acceptable. People aren't bad parents because they can't always control an unruly child and it doesn't mean the kid is bad- they're kids. But the thing that drives me more crazy is the parent not maybe taking the child outside or making some kind of effort to curb it. If I see there's *some* effort to try and stop it, I can feel bad for the parent dealing with the embarrassment and hassle of this. But half the time they just sit there and let the kid scream in a movie theater or kick seats on a plane or run around the store causing damage. Know your children and what they're temperament is and have courtesy for other people.
You just made me think it would be funny, (if a child kicked your seat on a plane and parent did zero to stop it) to slip a $20 to the person behind that parent, to trade sests with you, so you could deliver kicks to *their* seat for half the flight. I know it's not realistic, but it was just a funny thought... 😁
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I have kids myself and in no way would I describe myself as a strict parent. But I know the rules. What possessed these people to take a toddler and a baby to a fancy restaurant at 7:30 at night??? Also, when the kids start crying it's time to leave. Simple as that.
To those people that thought it was ok to take small kids to an expensive restaurant at 7:30, sure kids can go to restaurants and no one is saying that they have to stay hidden. Parents, however, should recognize that it's neither the time nor place for small kids. Wanna go out? There are plenty of family restaurants that cater to the noise young families make. How about showing some consideration for adults that don't want to listen to crying or boisterous kids?
Chuck e Cheese maybe....but I'm sick of brats ruining ANY of my meals! Stop taking them to restaurants....it's not healthy or cheap. Train your damned kids at home! Or get a babysitter!
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When I was a kid, if we didn't behave in a restaurant, my parents would pack us up and we would leave. There was home behaviour and restaurant behaviour and we quickly learned which was which.
EXACTLY! My mom would drag me out of a store, the mall, a restaurant, wherever we were if we were misbehaving. She knew that she would have to sacrifice what she wanted to do if we were being little shits.
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I cannot express how much I hate this comment, which sooner or later comes up in every thread about children behaving badly: "yUo wErE a CHilD OnCe ToO YoU KnoW" Yes, I was, like all of us. But my parents did not let me run amok or scream like a banshee on public places.
Leave your kids at home if they can't behave if you can't find a sitter you can go that's part of being a parent.
Precisely. Some parents are so entitled thinking it's acceptable to let their kid ruin other dining experience. Entitled parents and screeching kids is one of the downsides of working in retail (and I actually like my job).
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I'm so tired of entitled and inconsiderate parents. I went out the other day for dinner with my husband, the first time in about 10 months. Went on a Monday and got there at 4:15, deliberately trying to avoid a crowd. Things were nice and empty and calm. As soon as our drinks were put in front of us, that full boil kettle whistle screeching starts. Parents didn't care, didn't do anything to try to curtail it. Only other people in that section and they ruined our dinner. I would pay extra for a child-free restaurant. I shouldn't have to have my dinner ruined so you can take your kid out for a meal and not parent them. No three year old is even going to remember it anyway. Either be a parent or stay home with your screaming child.
I once gave this kid a glare down because they were up running circles around the table while their parents just sat there. I caught their eye, gave a slow shake of my head, and they immediately sat down in their seat and quieted all without their parents even noticing. Seriously, it's one thing if a kid is being loud by talking but when kids are being uncontrollable or chaotic, it's time to get the chicken nuggets to go.
I think there is a time and place for everything, even children. While I will not blame children for being children, I will blame parents for not handling situations that arise when taking them out in public properly. I don't imagine most young children would enjoy that kind of atmosphere anyway, so why even take them?
OP is reasonable. Don't take your spawn to a nice restaurant if they're gonna make everybody miserable.
If they can afford this restaurant they can afford a babysitter
There's a restaurant in a Chicago neighborhood with a sign on the door that states children of all ages have to behave and use their inside voices when they come. It drew a lot of complaints, but not as many as letters of approval.
To those who say children deserve a meal out. No they don't. Unitl they are 9 or 10 they won't appreciate it, before 5 they probably won't remember it. If the parents want a night out get a babysitter. When I was growing up we had to be at least 7 before we could go out. Our younger sister was left home until she was 7. If we acted up at all we were given three strikes. When we got home we were in trouble. One night when we acted up too much, WE LEFT THE RESTAURANT and went home. Misbehaving children are not and should no5 be anyone else's problem.
just dont take kids to fancy resturants, i mean im not a small child but still not an adult, and i wouldn't appreciate being forced to go to a fancy resturant, children dont like that kind of food any more than just a cheap fast food meal. as a plus, you bother literally every one else in the resturant
Exactly, people desiring, and paying for an expensive dinner should not have to eat at a day care
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No, if you can’t keep your child from climbing on windowsills and bashing cutlery on the table you have not earned a night out. I have four children, they knew by a very young age if you disturb the other patrons you were taken to the car, period end of discussion. If you were taken to the car you went home hungry. Restaurants should ask any diner no matter the age to leave if they are disruptive no matter if they’re a newborn or 90. Were I the couple I’d have eaten part of the meal as compensation for the restaurant not intervening, leaving just enough to justify refusing to pay as I was forced to abandon the meal. If enough people did that restaurants would change their policies on disruptive patrons.
My family had two parents and four children. On the rare occasion we were taken to a nice place we knew full well that misbehaving meant missing out. One parent would sit with us in the car to discuss why we were outside and how our actions affect others.
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I worked in nice restaurants for years and sometimes undisciplined children are a danger to themselves and others. I've seen children kick over the chair they are sitting in and hit the floor hard. They run into a server carrying hot food like melted butter for shellfish or someone carrying coffee. Somehow, this becomes the server's fault. Some children aren't ready for fine dining.
I saw one take a glass from a tray of drinks the server was balancing. The father wore the rest and began to yell at the young lady. I was quick to jump to her defense saying his “spoiled spawn” was the reason that happened and HE should apologize.
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It's the parents' fault that they cannot manage their children. One of your responsibilities as parents is to teach them to act appropriately in public, and if they are too young to understand, than to avoid places like restaurants until they do. My children were never permitted to act like that and I don't respect parents that think this is ok.
This. I don’t hate kids…I hate the hall of some parents that think their little angels can do no wrong or just ignore the behavior. I was a hostess for a short time at a sports bar type place. One woman would bring her little girl in all the time and the staff knew her well. So the servers would “oh she’s so cute” her but they were busy. I was up front alone and stuck with this kid who I didn’t know, constantly demanding my seating chart board, extra crayons…it was beyond annoying. I’m not getting paid squat, and I’m not getting paid to watch your brat. That and retail. In the area where I worked it was a town of entitlement: ages 0-70. But the amount of kids that would come in, run around and ruin the store…I literally started kicking them out. If they threatened to call their parents I told them to go be my guest. Grrrr!!! I feel for OP as I’ve gone out and have seen so many kids unsupervised, running around screaming, going up to strangers’ tables…and I just wanted to trip them.
I was raised in a Mediterranean country where it was absolutely normal to see young children eating out with their families at nice restaurants during dinner hours (generally between 9pm and 11:30 pm). They'd sit politely and eat regular food (rather than special kid food) with their families, and if they misbehaved, they'd get disciplined, and fast (read: a swift smack on the hand or the face). If things got out of hand, a family member would take the child outside, but that was rare. In all my time living there, I never saw a restaurant situation where kids where allowed to scream or run around without parental intervention. It's an interesting difference in parenting between the US and other countries.
The father of the children made more noise by playing peek a boo? The parents should have done something about all this noise. One of them could have taken them outside or to the car.
Parents are entitled to a meal out... BUT they should get a babysitter! FFS
Be a responsible parent and stop expecting everyone else to tolerate little Becky's "adorable" behavior. We are not required to like your child and if we're paying to be there too we also deserve a good experience sans screaming children (and as I've read elsewhere smelly diapers). People shouldn't have to "stay home" to have a nice meal without your children constantly interrupting and disturbing them. It shouldn't be up to us to raise your child or correct your lack of parenting because you don't have any respect for anyone around you but some of us will do exactly this. It doesn't feel good for anyone so please have some respect for those around you.
I don't dispute that kids are awesome as the one person said in the article. But they are also people and they need to be taught how to behave in a social setting. Be a parent, control your children, bring things if you have to to keep them entertained at the table without getting crazy. Start being considerate of others around and your children will see that and hopefully model your behavior. But so many adults these days have children but they don't know how to be a parent
NTA at all. Expecting very small children to sit thru a dinner & not make a peep is akin to baptizing a cat. Ya may as well tell the sun not to shine. I didn't/don't take m' kids or grandkids to places where others want an adult situation. There are many other venues that accommodate active children- the parents were inconsiderate...period.
Some parents cop out of their job as parents by implying that kids will be kids. If your kid is in someone else's space then you as a parent are wrong and have failed and there are no valid excuses for otherwise. I would guess that those who disagree are parents with unruly kids themselves.
The thing is, I think most parents generally agree that it's odd to take that many young children to an expensive restaurant that late in the evening. A lot of people seem to be proclaiming they would never do such a thing, or they would be more careful about it. That's not really the issue here, because it only takes one. There's always going to be someone out there who either just doesn't care how their children might be bothering other people, or it's an extenuating circumstance, like a holiday, even if it's not something they normally do all the time. Nobody is really arguing that families shouldn't be allowed a nice dinner once in a while, and there should be places that can accomodate that without upsetting everybody else. But what that means is it's really up to the restaurants to try to mitigate this, not the individuals. They either need to make it clear that certain times of day are child-free, or provide a separate area for noisy parties, not just children. I assume it must be uncomfortable for everybody when the baby starts crying in a quiet restaurant. Wouldn't even the parents rather be in an area where they don't have to feel embarrassed?
If parents aren't going to keep their kids from being loud and running around in places they aren't supposed to, I *will* laugh when their child trips or bumps into something.
I may have accidentally tripped a child running in a grocery store once. I didn’t let him hit the floor but nor did I scurry out of the way as he flew over my cane. I’ve had back surgery, I AM NOT moving for unruly children. They should be taught better.
Load More Replies... There are Restaurants in the Del Marva section of Old Town Alexandra. VA that do not allow Children to eat there so that the Patrons can enjoy an entire Meal Child Free. I am Glad that they do this so Adults can have a Nice, Child, Free Meal. I agree with this because we went through this with our Daughter's when they were growing up, and we would take them to Fast Food places when they used to have Play Area's in them. Only Chucky E. Cheese still have them. Parents with Children should wait until the Children are more Grown and Taught how to Behave when out in Public. Parents need to see what it's like when their Dinner gets interrupted by other people's Children, and then Rethink about taking their Children to an Expensive Restaurant to have a Great Dinner. Next time, Hire a Babysitter to watch your Kids so that you can have a Great Dinner yourself.
Has happened to my husband and myself, the Keg is an expensive restaurant, never spent under $200 but constantly kids running by my table, to the point my husband had to tell them they can't. The mothers were just chatting away ignoring till my husband spoke up and gave us dirty glares. Your job lady and we are trying to have a nice meal. Had happened so often we never go back any more. Found a wonderful place that is child free at dinner. Please people, take care of your kids, some of us never get much if any alone time away from our own, don't ruin it for the rest of us.
If you go to an expensive restaurant and somebody comes in with kids literally everybody in the restaurant tenses up. Parents don't realise it because they're parents but seriously, the second anybody sees kids we can't enjoy ourselves because we're waiting for them to freak out and start screaming. My opinion is if your kid starts screaming in the restaurant you have 5 minutes to shut them up or you can get the hell out and go to a Mcdonald's with the rest of the trash
No! We don't want that at McDonalds either! Go to Chuck E Cheese or stay home!
Load More Replies... That lady wasn't being unreasonable. I've asked to be reseated due to noisy children. I don't go out to eat very often, but when I do, I carefully pick a place and time that children won't be around. I don't have children, and I don't want them, even had a hysterectomy, so why should I have to babysit your child because you decided to eat out at your child's bedtime? However, it's important to note that the parents of the children are complete ignorant, indignant assholes. They are responsible for their children. I have never been mad at the kids, but I do get frustrated with parents. And, my mouth can get me in trouble, because I rarely stay quiet about these things.
I know if it had been me, I would have spoken up. Or my husband would have beat me to it. I would said something to those lazy a*s non parents to rein in their monsters!
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There's a difference between children needing to be put in public to learn how to deal and this. What irresponsible, lazy parents.
I feel like it's a time and place thing. If you're somewhere where people are expected to wear some sort of jacket, then yeah there shouldn't be kids there. If you're at an Applebee's then you should probably expect to hear someone's kid screaming its head off. Parents if you're not sure just ask yourself "is this the type of establishment that will provide crayons?" If the answer is no, then get a sitter.
No! Applebee's is NOT made for children! NO ONE should EXPECT to listen to I'll behaved children of assholes! You expect to hear loud kids at play grounds and Chuck E Cheese, stop effing up my meals a*****e parents!
Load More Replies... The key is to start your child young. I have 2 sons now 22 and 17. We started taking them almost everywhere (except bars of course) with us when they were babies so by the time they were 2 and 3 they knew how to act in nice restaurants. We always made sure they had had a nap, came armed with quiet activities for them to do and gave them food before we got there because usually the problems arise when the child is tired, bored or hungry. Most of the time we got comments about how well behaved they were. There were a few times they acted up and we had an escape plan so we didn't disturb other people. Just because you have kids doesnt mean its ok to disturb other people. Its people that dont dicipline their kids or they do what they call the "soft discipline"🙄 that makes bringing kids to nice restaurants worrisome. My kids knew if we had to get up and have a meeting in the restroom that they werent going to be happy. I think we only needed 1 or 2 of those private meetings.🤣
You should not take your children out to eat at a nice restaurant during prime times. I would be annoyed if I paid for an expensive meal and has disruptive children sittynear by. So many don't realize there is a time children need to be in bed and not in a restaurant or even shopping. Many times I have seen parents having children in a store at 8 or 9 pm. They are tied and need to.bw in bed. A bottle of wine doesn't comoensate for a meal being disruptrd.
Nothing bothers me more than undisciplined children in a nice quite restaurant. If you can't control your children, please don't bring them to nice restaurants, take them to Chuck E Cheese.
Don't come to Malta, kids are running around like feral cats, while parents ignore them. There should be 100% child free restaurants, bars, cafes, flights well everything should have a childfree option. Hate the little brats !!
When my kids were that young I would leave if they started acting up or crying. I have since decided that restaurants should have childfree seating. Some restaurants used to have or still have rooms for group or company meetings that should now be for families. I would have utilized them with my youngsters.
One day I watched as this little boy repeatedly asked his brother to take him to the bathroom. The large family took up two tables and essentially left the kids to take care of each other. As I sat on the patio I watched the kid looking around, I have a son, I know the look. He pulled down his pants and started peeing on the potted plants in front of me. I’m not proud but I was so stunned I said “seriously?!” The father turned and looked at me like I was TAH for calling out the boy urinating on the terrace!
That’s just gross. Good on you for bringing it to his oblivious fathers attention!
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Many times people with kids go out to these establishments and hire a baby sitter for the kids. Do you really think they want to go out and then be bothered by other people's out of control children.
My mom used to always hire a sitter for me when they went out to fancy places. But sometimes I went and my mom was strict about manners and behaving. Kids can and should learn young. I'm not saying people should be hearing parents berating their kids every minutes. But if expectations and simple dining etiquette were taught at home it would be a lot easier for kids to know how to behave at a restaurant. I don't care if it's a fast food dive, an Applebees, or some fancy restaurant. Other diners shouldn't have to put up with kids running around screeching, screaming (no, it's not exercising their lungs), banging utensils, smacking the table, disrupting others space. Yeah, kids are kids, but that's why they have parents. To teach them how to function in society. It can start young. But at a fancy, expensive restaurant leave the younglins at home. They're not having fun, there's nothing to colour, the lights are usually dim which is likely why they get tired in there so fast.
People choose to have children. They choose to take them to expensive restaurants rather than paying for a babysitter. They choose to take the stance that EVERYONE in the restaurant must cooperate with their experiment in teaching their infants, toddlers, and squirmy kids how to behave in an environment where adults are trying to enjoy a fine meal. Why so entitled? These are not my kids, nor are they my choice, and perhaps your "education" should include learning what the sacrifices and pitfalls are of parenthood before jumping in, assuming that The Village will ooh and aww and coo at your screaming baby while their forty buck entree is cooling on the plate. Go to a family style restaurant and make plans for childcare if you want to enjoy an adult evening out.
The people siding with the parents obviously never had a goblin screaming at the top of their lungs RIGHT IN YOUR EAR for a full hour. It's one thing if they're yours, I hear parents get dulled to the screaming, but God forbid they're NOT your kids but youre forced to sit there and listen to them anyway, unwilling, and unexpected. I'm sorry, but you're a crappy parent if you just let it go on without a thought in your entitled brain and you're a crappy person if you think this kind of thing is okay.
I met a guy who wouldn't hold his mouth and inform the parents ignoring their kids ruining everyone else's time, "I didn't go to your house, take your screaming kid(s) outside." Every parent should understand that when in public allowing screaming/crying kids is not cute, we strangers are not in their privet house should hurry their asses out the door with their brats! I love kids, but wouldn't ever sit there letting my kid scream and cry in public. It's annoying!! And parents should start understanding that. Not my fault you had kids and they're not behaving in public.
Most fine dining restaurants where I live have a policy for no children under a certain age after a certain time. They can call and ask what their policy is. However, it's up to the parents to look after and discipline their kids. I used to be a waitress and I have seen all sorts of things. Kids running around the restaurant like it's a playground and the parents just did nothing. All it takes is a kid running into a waitress with hot food to cause issues and a lawsuit.
At 6 o’clock their mummies & daddies will take them home to bed because they’re tired little teddy bears. Applies to children too. Yes parents are entitled to a meal in a restaurant, what they are not entitled to do is bring along 3 children that are going to disrupt the dining pleasure of the other patrons. Parents need to be considerate of other diners & not allow their progeny to irritate & disturb other patrons. I think all quality restaurants should have a 6:30 limit for young children to be gone. I had 4 kids & would never have allowed them to behave like that in a restaurant. If you want your kids to be able to run amok unchecked, take them to Maccas.
Siblings and I learned very early that leaving the house for any reason was contingent on knowing how to behave in public. It's not rocket science.
People should be licensed to breed. And those a*****e parents need to realize their hellspawn are not the precious gift to the rest of us they seem to think they are. Sure, they may be able to tune out their screaming, but for the rest of the patrons of that expensive restaurant, those rotten crumbsnatchers were a nightmare. I would've made them comp me the whole meal.
If an adult would fart, scream and running around, someone would be held accountable., The adult. If kids are doing it, then also someone would be held accountable, the adult. 'Training' kids for a restaurant is totally fine, but not in an upscale restaurant at 8 in the evening. You don't drop your kid for training in the sea, do you? You begin small, it's called baby steps for a reason. Otherwise the Italian approach works. Outdoor playground, go rage there.
Rule number 1. Do not take children too young to understand manners to fancy restaurants. You start out when children are small and take them to McDonald's or someplace similar. Work your way up to family diners and only when they understand how to behave do you take them to a restaurant with a wine list. I once worked at a very exclusive restaurant and some morons booked a birthday party for an eight year old there. Table of ten, two adults and eight children. There was nothing on the menu these children were interested in, the adults proceeded to guzzle wine as if it were water and everyone was angry: the other patrons, the children, the waitstaff and management. A little common sense goes a long way. Unfortunately, common sense and courtesy is disappearing, while entitlement is increasing. Fancy restaurants should just have a no child policy.
When my children were loud in restaurants, I take then outside and won't let them back in until they are quiet
No, parents are absolutely NOT entitled to a night out with noisy children, although the person who wrote that is an entitled b******e. As one person said "you were a kid once..." yeah, and my parents hired a baby sitter or asked a relative to come watch us when they went out like that. Some don't have kids by choice, others of us don't have kids because we aren't ready, either way, parents need to stop ruining things for the childless or those who kept them at home. I'm a bit of an alcoholic, assuming I couldn't control myself at a nice restaurant, is ok for my friends to bring me anyway? If it's ok for a kid to make a scene, why not me? I may be an adult, but I'm clearly a social liability! And anyone who thinks OP is a butt, and so am I, your a hypocrite. Let's make one thing clear, if you bring a child you know is prone to being loud and unable to control (which is understandable for them, they are a child) to a nice restaurant, or on public transportation when it's not necessary, you are an inconsiderate b******e.
I think the restaurant could have a policy of no children after a certain time. We've gone to dinner at 5.30pm a couple of times when oir children were younger, and now at 6pm with a 7 & 9 yr olds. A cut off of 7.30 or 8pm would give them plenty of time to eat, leaving a quiet space for adults to eat from that time
These people brought very young children to an expensive restaurant at almost 8:00 at night. That is too late to bring young kids anywhere and expect them to behave. It is well known that kids go full meltdown when they're tired. Those parents probably couldn't get a sitter but decided to go out anyway because they're just extremely selfish.
While it does seem a little bit entitled at first look for OP to be so mad,once I read the full story,I completely agree with them. Even at 16,if I act a fool even slightly, I get a warning and the next time it happens , we're gone. I don't act up anymore but it is still a rule in place for the days I think I'm grown enough to get all sassy.
I find it odd that modern parenting seems to teach that there are no manners at home. Small children find it difficult to switch gears out in public. Parents taught formal manners at home to their children in Victorian times, and they were used at home. Manners are not special occasion items . That being said fine dining and children are like oil and water. If you can afford the dinner, you can afford childcare. Yes children need to be exposed to fine dining. When they are old enough to appreciate it and old enough to behave. Practice that etiquette at home first with them, if they do well reward them with a fine dining experience.
I don't understand it either. My parents taught us to always use manners and to say please and thank you, even to family, at home, or in a relaxed setting. We were taught from a young age to never scream or yell, except if we were in danger or badly hurt. As a kid, I thought my parents were being to strict, but now I appreciate them for teaching us well. If I have kids someday I'll be raising them the same way. I couldn't handle kids constantly running around, screaming in public places, not listening, and being generally rude.
Load More Replies... If you want to "train" your kids, do so without annoying and punishing other people! The correct place to do this, for you clueless a*****e parents, is at home at your own godamned kitchen table! No, not Denny's, or any other "public" restaurant for that matter. And the management of these PRIVATELY OWNED ESTABLISHMENTS need to grow a pair and tell the parents, either get your kids under control or get the 'f out, you are bothering other people and it won't be tolerated...period!
Okay I believe parents should be allowed to go out with their kids but the other people who believed that's responses were all entitled parent responses "I'm sure you were a delight"? Um no. No child is a delight. Having a kid you are to sign up for sleep deprivation, constant wailing, feeding them every few hours even if you yourself forget to eat breakfast and dinner. Those children were excited and happy to be out hence that energy but their parents were not directive enough and should have told them to sit down or they were leaving. It was simple as that for us. My mom had a talk in the car before we went in and we were not afraid in these modern times to bring... *Babababaaa* TABLETS AND HEADPHONES FOR THE KIDS! there are so. Many. Solutions. For that behavior. And being all like "well how is my kid supposed to learn and how are they supposed to enjoy their night and how this and that because y o u r being an a*s" honey, it is YOUR JOB to teach them. NOT the general public.
Oh boy if this script was flipped and it was adults or older kids there would be next to no defenders. If OP had been acting out and not the children, they'd of been asked to leave. Going out for a date as a couple without children (even if it's without a child just for the night) shouldn't be punished. Just like going out with kids shouldn't be punished (even if it's at 7:30 pm, the universal cranky time for anyone under the age of 9)
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One of the commenters asked how you're suppose to teach children how to behave in public if you're not supposed to take them out. If she/he had read the whole post, the main complaint was that these parents WEREN'T teaching their offspring how to behave...not if one was crawling on the windowsill behind OP's head, one was banging the table incessantly with a spoon and one was screaming when daddy was playing a game with them. That's NOT how you train your kids to behave in public. That's stuff you do in your own home without the risk of ruining someone else's dinner. And yes...I have kids
Ugh kids are the worst. High-end restaurants, delicate exhibitions, alcoholic venues - kids don't belong. Get a sitter or stay home so the adults can enjoy what we're paying for. It's not my fault some people didn't use protection.
I understand that parents need to take their children places so they can teach them how to behave, but these parents weren't doing that. I would understand if the noise was just crying or whining, but the parents shouldn't just sit there and let it happen when the children are banging silverware and climbing all over furniture.
I mostly agree with you, except for this- kids should be taught at home FIRST, and then those lessons can be practiced out in public. Maybe have your first “practice session” at a place where you won’t cause much of a disruption if things go sideways. Fast food places, Chuck E. Cheese, and generally places where they’ll just kinda blend in with the background noise- IHOP, Denny’s, Cracker Barrel, Red Robin… there are hundreds of places that are “family-friendly.” They are so for a reason- kids DO need to know how to behave in public, and “in public” covers a lot of places and situations. It is sheer torture for very young children to have to sit quietly and patiently when they’re hungry and surrounded by the aroma of delicious food that they don’t have in front of them. Hunger and boredom are the root causes of most of the misbehaving. Giving them something to do, along with a small snack, will alleviate these problem. It’s simply a good parenting move to come prepared.
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I'd like to see some restaurants open up that either have a separate room for groups with children, we'll say under the age of 12, or not allow children under 12 at all. But that will never happen. The parents with the most ill behaved children think their little beasts are angels. Kids don't belong everywhere. I have 3, all adults now, we brought them to family restaurants only. We now have grandchildren, 2 of them are grown, the other 2 I wouldn't take to Chucky Cheese. The 9 year old has atrocious table manners and the 3 year old is a professional tantrum thrower.
The general rule I have: if they serve alcohol, mostly just adults, especially after 5/6.
The title had me fuming. The kids "ruined" the dinner - ruined is in quotes why? This exactly would have ruined a dinner for me. If your children act up, remove them from the establishment. It's not hard. It's parenting. *edit: just remembered! My mother did not take me out to eat UNTIL I WAS TWO and had been taught to know better. She literally didn't go out to eat. It wasn't that hard.
Sometimes adults can be really loud too. I wonder if the OP would have been as irritated when she encountered a bunch of loud executives in the restaurant instead.
Yes! Assholes are assholes, she was complaining about a*****e parents.
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Is it just me or is BP publishing a LOT of anti-children articles? (Please if you disagree, please comment, downvotes just get people banned.)
I'm surprised you didn't talk in this post about all the wealth and well behaved child you have 🤣
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Oh I am so torn on this issue. While I hate when kids run loose in restaurants and create havoc, mine also runs, albeit doesn't create havoc. I don't mind kids playing, being loud, but kids deliberately being a pain in the a** and even causing damage without so much as a glance from their parents' make me tick. I try to keep my kid in line, I know kids can be a handful but at least make the effort to keep your kid occupied
If your kid is running around in a restaurant your kid is creating havoc. Keep your spawn at the table and quiet or keep your restaurant visits to Chuck e cheese
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I love the kids in my life so much, but I don’t like being in situations where parents bring their kids along and ignore when the kids aren’t well behaved. There are plenty of family friendly places to go. I would love kid free hours at certain places. I didn’t have kids, they did, don’t make everyone else listen to your baby cry.
Nothing worse that having a nice meal ruined by obnoxious kids. When we go out to eat, I refuse to be seated next to anyone with small children (or a large party).
People who bring children to nice restaurants are assholes. They're children. No matter how well behaved their parents think they are, they're prone to tantrums and other gross things I'd rather not have associated with dinner time.
You can always tell the people that have rude a*s kids that they dont teach manners to because they offended. "Why dont get kids get to have a nice meal? Boo hoo" its not a nice meal if ur kid is crawling on a window seal!!! Thats when u take your child outside. Have some empathy for once and maybe ur kids will learn by your example. Maybe the woman complaining has 3 kids at home and this is first timr in months she gets to go out and get relief from the kids. They paid for a babysitter or had family take care of them. Or they just dont want to hear ur kids scream and have a peaceful stressless meal
When I was a kid my parents would bring something for me to be entertained with whenever we went out. Usually a book. One of the main rules was no leaving your chair. Never had any trouble with that at all. At child friendly restaurants we were allowed to be at the playing area as long as there was no food on the table.
If you are going to an expensive restaurant you are entitled to eat your meal in peace. Parents need to control their children. That seems to be a thing of the past. Families with very young kids need to go to family friendly restaurants where everyone expects a bit of noise. At that age certainly none of mine knew what the inside of a restaurant looked like. Even though they were well behaved, this is going back to the 70s and 80s when we were in recession.
Anytime someone is affecting others ability and right to enjoy an atmosphere that *should* be peaceful and enjoyable (that you're paying for!), it's on them. It's on the parents of the kids. They should not be there if they cannot behave. Does everyone else who doesn't have kids deserve that? No. I can't believe people argue the counterpoint. Doesn't matter if its a cheap dine in or a five star, don't disrupt other people's enjoyment of something! I have a kid, and ASD kid, and I taught him better right away-- lovingly explaining and using examples he could understand to show how certain behavior was disruptive and unfair to other people. To make him compassionate and self aware. Its not that hard. And I learned his limits, and I didn't try to push those limits where he would meltdown around others and make a scene. In the cases that he did that weren't easily avoidable, I would apologize and excuse the both of us, so it didn't *stay* a scene for others to endure.
When my kida were a baby/toddler, they were pretty well behaved. But... a tired baby/toddler will cry and get cranky. That's normal behavior for their age. Knowing this we never had dinner out later than 5:30pm and we always chose more family friendly restaurants. And even then we'd take them outside if they were having a meltdown. I'd just feel incredibly bad for ruining some one else's dinner. So I'm siding with the OP here. Yes, parents can go out for dinner... even a nice dinner. But if they can afford an expensive meal, they can afford baby sitting. They need to be less entitled and understand proper societal etiquette in such dining establishments.
The woman is totally correct. Loud kids at a nearby table does ruin the experience. Parents with small kids should be seated in a separate room or sent to McDonald's. She should have been given the meal and wine free.
We love to go out & thus, trained our kids very early to have good table manners at home & out. An occasional issue with an infant is rare but understandable. If the infant (not toddler) won't stop, then the family should get their meals to go & she should take the baby away from the dining area in the meanwhile. No unruly, loud, ill-mannerered persons should not be allowed to ruin others' time out. They obviously ruin dinner at home. Bad parenting
There's an old adage saying one person's freedom ends where another's begins. Same principle here, and I'm not just saying that because I'm childfree and never want to have them. Also yes, I was a child myself, but I was an extremely understanding and well-behaved kid thanks to my upbringing. Yes, children have inherent traits of becoming bored, curious etc, but it's all down to how you respond, as a parent, to each and every thing they do. You let them misbehave more than a couple of times, you can be sure they'll be way harder to educate out of it afterwards. People who try to argue that screaming, yelling and throwing tantrums are normal behaviour for kids know s**t about it, no offence, or simply don't wanna bother more than necessary. Evolutionary speaking look at all baby animals and see how roughly they are being disciplined by their parents if they cross the lines of accepted social behavior, like not making a fuss in order to avoid being detected, no chewing on mom etc. So parent's saying it's just kids being kids....no, it's just your kids having lousy "parents" giving them a lousy upbringing. And that's the truth, whether you admit it or not.
I am not saying that my wife and are perfect parents, but I can say we had a plan to deal with this. First don't take our young child to reasturants that are not kid friendly (at first). Next get the child ready by practicing and making sure there are clear consequences for not following rules, that you consistently apply. We started by taking our child to family type reasturants and the moment she got fussy one of us would grab her up and take her to the lobby. She would get a moment to collect herself and come back to the table. If not, out to the car we would go while the other parent got our food wrapped up. Once we went to the car, there was no coming back in (ever). Which also meant no treats. It only took a couple of times for our child to realize that this behavior would not be tolerated (at all). We had no problem taking our child wherever we wanted after she understood the rules.
Its disheartening that there are so many people ready to defend the parents that arent willing to put forth the effort to raise their kids. Thankfully ours is now getting ready to go to college but when he was a tiny handful and we wanted to go out for a nice dinner we would take him to granny and grandpas so we could get a break. Other diners deserve that same break. The way you raise kids to be considerate is to be considerate yourself. Its easy
If your children do not know how to behave in a restaurant ( you have to teach them while at home) then get a babysitter to go out.
Childless by choice here. I tell people off if their kids are being jerks. If you can't control your kids it's your fault. Get them out of the window sill or I'm yelling at them. For people with kids like this, a baby sitter is part of the cost of going out. If you can't afford it, it's not my problem. You chose to have kids.
If that had been me at that age, I would have been taken to a quiet place and told, in NO in certain terms, that this was not the place for that kind of behavior. But I was raised to be polite in public. Under 5 years old is too young for an obviously adult setting.
If you want a nice meal, leave the kids with a babysitter. You want your kids? Go to a "family" restaurant. I have very little disposable income. I would be LIVID if parents cannot control their children. I don't expect them to be dead silent, but I do expect them to eat and converse with their parents at the same volume as the rest of the dining room. Best that these restaurants have a "no child under age 10" policy. If they can't behave at that age, the manager can bounce 'em.
I think it's always a good idea to call and ask if they allow small children after a certain hour at a dinner restaurant where you want to go. Some higher-end places will not, usually under the pretext that alcohol will be served at tables or what not (but we all know the real reason) or say that they reserve an area for families with children. Those are the places you want to go if you want to wind down from a long day during dinner.
I use to take my children to restaurants when they were young and continued to do so. But I had taught my kids what goid manners and behavior they need to use when around other people - especially restaurants. I never got a complaint about my children disturbing other dinners. I did this because my children need to know how to deal with all sorts of situations as adults. After all a parents job is to teach their children how to be responsible adults
A little bit of fuss is one thing but no shouting and no climbing. This is on the parents, not the poster.
Gotta love the ones sticking up for the parents saying "Do the parents and children not deserve an expensive meal ?". The answer is "NO...THEY DON'T IF THEY'RE GOING TO BOTHER EVERYBODY ELSE AROUND THEM !!!". God, I swear some people are just so f*****g brain-dead.
Maybe restaurants need to have a separate section for parents with young children where they can play and not bother others.
We took our kids to kid friendly, but nice, restaurants where we trained them how to act in polite company. For birthdays, we took them to upscale restaurants as a treat, reminding them of how to act. We did, however, make reservations for 5:00 or 5:30 since most people who are going out for a nice night out prefer a later time. If you can’t do that, get a babysitter and have a nice dinner yourself and order them pizza!
The people arguing "don't the parents deserve a night out"? Yes. Yes they do. Right after they get a FRIGGIN babysitter!
I absolutely relate to how the women felt. We have 2 kids who are now in their 20s. From the time they were 2 weeks old we have taken them with us to restaurants. They were always kept in their seats and NEVER allowed to wander around the table let alone about the restaurant. We paid attention to them so they were quiet and on the occasion they broke bad they were immediately taken outside until they calmed down or if they didn't we left. There were a few times we didn't get through the first course. Before kids I never liked being near young children in a restaurant because invariably they were noisy and the parents never addressed the issue so as not to trouble other diners. It is definitely the fault of the parents who were clueless and inconsiderate of the people around them. They should have removed the children until they quieted down. Also, the woman should have contacted the maitre'd and had them deal with the issue as I am sure other diners we're not happy as well.
I think there should be a strict policy for kids in upscale restaurants. Getting seated no later than 5 p.m. Kids typically start getting tired & cranky by 6:30-7:00. They need to be home by then & getting ready for bed. Idc how much of a kid person you are, I KNOW, no one wants to waste their time or money, being miserable when out for a nice dinner. And sadly, there's SO many parents that are too stupid to realize that the rest of society has no desire to have your kids imposed on them. The world doesn't revolve around you just because you're too tight to hire a sitter for a couple hours. I would've left this restaurant & found another one or just went home. Parents act like the minute they sit down tht the restaurant automatically becomes their sitter & they totally block out what their kids are doing & this seriously SUCKS!! STOP IT!!
I hope these children treat these jerks in their old age as awful as they have been treated. If you want a quiet private dinner order in. There are restaurants with age restrictions. Eat there. People just want to blame someone for their own misery. Get a life and leave the children alone! If children exiting bothers you, then clearly you are a POS. Adults act like spoiled children, then they complain about actual kids (who have an excuse for not being able to control their emotions)? This species is doomed. Anyone who agrees with this person is garbage.
First what the heck are toddlers and an infant doing awake past 7:30? Let alone, out and about at a fancy restaurant? As a mother to 5, I would NEVER bring my children to a place like that at 7:30pm! Maybe McDonalds as a LAST resort, but not fine dining. Other people didnt make the choice to spawn my crotch goblins and keep them up past a reasonable time just to eat at a restaurant that probably wont serve foods my kids want to eat anyway. Ergh. This makes me so angry.
Allowing them to bang cutlery and crawl on the window sill is not new behavior, regardless of age. This is carry over behavior from home. Yes, children will be disruptive, especially when they're bored and tired but if taught certain things from home these "little sponges" will absorb what is acceptable, and not. You're not being unreasonable because this is not totally the children's fault. The parents bear quite a bit of the responsibility here.
"New parents have the right to dine put" Right. Because when I'm planning a special evening for my wife my first thought is "you know what would make the night just PERFECT? A shrieking infant in my ear for the entirety of my meal!" Sure you have the right to eat out. Just like I have the right to not have to put up with your selfish lack of parenting.
The nicest place that I take my toddler is somewhere like Olive Garden, and we leave if she is misbehaving. I do say to give parents a few minutes to calm the child down because it can take a short period of time to get them distracted if something upset them. My rule for if the restaurant is appropriate is if they have a separate kids menu, especially one with crayons; those restaurants are expecting kids and toddlers. Anything more expensive than that is a no. Unfortunately, the grandparents don't always remember that and will take us somewhere fancier than we would have been ok taking our daughter to if we had known. I also like the times I have been to restaurants, and it's quiet enough that the hostess is able to sit all the families in the same area and the people without kids in another. It's a lot less stressful and annoying for everyone.
I'm not getting all the things about kids not going to the restaurant at 7:30, though. Some people just have later schedules. My daughter's bedtime has always been 9 because that works better with our schedule. She just sleeps later than most kids her age too. So us being out to eat at 7:30 is pretty usual, and I'm seeing more younger families out that late too. Everyone's work and home schedules are different. Kids don't need to be in bed at 7 anymore.
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I think the problem is the parents don’t know how to discipline kids these days. No I’m not saying beat them, but I’ve seen kids out like this and you just always wonder how they act at home. There’s a reason for the cliché curtain climbers. Kids only do what they are taught and mimic what they see and hear. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t like snot gobblers. I don’t however mind we’ll behaved kids. Training begins at home. So no not bu
Alot of people love nothing more than to complain about others children, so I thought I'd share some food for thought. A restaurants main buisness is to make money by preparing and selling food. A simple couple would pay for two meals, maybe a glass of wine each, and maybe a dessert each. A family with three kids is paying for 5 meals 5 drinks and possibly 5 desserts. Which means they are actually paying far more than the complainers. A restaurants main income comes from families. Without families coming in they could not stay afloat. The money coming in from the occasional couples would simply not be enough to keep it going. The OP sounds like someone who expects the world to revolve around them. The restaurant had lots of other paying guests to take care of, not just her.
Kids have as much right as anyone and are the future regular customers. Kids have a sixth sense about strangers not liking them and will respond accordingly. So if you want nice, calm, behaved kids at the table next to you, be nice to them, theyll be nice and respectful back. And vice-versa! Also, parents are also allowed a little slack, they are paying handsomely for it, they chose not to go to MaccyD's! Having said that, in my experience, if this was a truly upmarket establishment the whole thing would have been taken care of very efficiently and effortlessly by the staff who would have anticipated any issue. But banning children is commercial suicide in Europe, and probably illegal?
Ok, so I probably will get down voted but consider 3/4 hypotesis with me: 1. The family had to save money to go to the restaurant and could not afford a babysitter. My parents worked hard but we rarely had money to eat out, let alone on fancy placeals and wherever they did get enough money, they took me and my sibs, even when we where young 2. They DID hire a babysitter, who had to cancel for some reason and they didn't find another. "Then just don't go!". At least in my country, a lot of places have non-refund If is a reservation, so they might have decided to take the kids and use the Babysitter money to pay the children meal... OR 3. OP did not say if someone Else was on the table. It might have been a birthday or something, or someone might have got there after OP left. Once my dad's cousin came to visit and invited us to a fancy place when I was like 5, and my parents did not feel like refusing free food and seeing a stranded family member bc some people might be bothered by us...
I am a Grandmother that adores her 2 grandchildren. The six of us, (daughter, Saint-son-in-law, husband, and 2 Grandchildren, (3 and 6) went out to dinner at a very nice family owned restaurant in Atlanta. My Grandchildren were wild. Nothing, not threats or treats could convince them to behave. We ordered a large order of their famous Greek food. Children camped out under table. I excused myself and found the matriarch that rules the dining room. I explained my problem and paid our bill with a healthy tip. The lovely woman did exactly what I asked. She walked over to our table and said she was sorry but we had to leave. The adults loved it. We acted so embarrassed and apologetic. The restaurant is famous for their fabulous cases of desserts as you walk in. The children, still in shock, asked if they couldn’t have a dessert to go. We said ,”no they won’t let us take them home”. You could see the little gears in their brains working. That was years ago. We never had another problem! 😂
I lived this with my youngest daughter. We would go to a nice restaurant and she would immediately clear the table of all silver and salt and pepper, anything she could get her hands on and then scream so loud if you tried to take them away, you and everyone else could hardly think. The difference between these scenarios was I would immediately remove myself and my daughter from the restaurant so everyone in our party and the restaurant could enjoy their dinner. After two of these experiences, where I walked the sidewalk while everyone enjoyed their dinner, I decided this was why kid restaurants weigh play areas were the restaurants appropriate to teach children "put to dinner manners" not fine dinning restaurants. My desire to enjoy a nice restaurant with a toddler does not outway others in their desire to enjoy a fine dinning experience without chaos at the next table. Let's be honest who really enjoys that. This is a perfect example of people not being responsible or socially.
So my issue with this is that you are expecting the place to not have parents and kids as if you and your needs are singlehandedly more important. Kids exist. You are the master of your own feelings. You cannot control what other people will do. You allowed the presence of children to ruin your evening. For example, will we ban people that are just too noisy because they're having a good time? Adults can be pretty loud and I really don't care to hear your conversations either. But you have a choice to either let it get to you or to just go on with your meal and accept you don't control other people.
And before you ask, no I don't take kids to fancy places, but I'm not going to restrict other people from taking their kids to go have a nice meal.
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At the end of the day.... if you are bothered by noisy children in an expensive place or any place it would be best to book a table at a place that does not allow children. Because you have control over that. You can't control other people and their choices in places to eat, whether they bring their kids, how those kids behave and what the parents or the restaurant does about it. You can call the kids, their parents and the restaurant assholes but that doesn't change the fact that your evening out was ruined. The price point of said restaurant in the end is completely irrelevant. An assumption the price point meant no noisy kids is misguided.
Kids DO NOT belong in fancy expensive restaurants! I have 4 (now adults) and 6 grandchildren and although I and their parents wouldn't let them act up they just don't belong there. As for the crying parents that told the OP she was wrong...trust me when I tell you we all don't think your kids are precious!
Your issue should be with the children's parents, not the kids. Thet failed to keep their children under control or quietly entertained. Since you couldnt move your table, you should have spoken diplomatically to the parents. Then, some times there just isnt a fix for other peoples behaviour. You got a free bottle of wine. Thats life.
Though I'm torn on the whole kids in bed by 730 thing, I don't exactly believe that they should only be allowed to dine at fast food places. I also firmly believe in keeping your children in check and teaching them proper dining etiquette starting from toddlerhood. I also have been known to either cancel my order or get it changed to to go if my kids got to the point where they refused to behave.
If the children act this way in public and the parents Don't take care of the problem, I can only imagine what dinner time is like at their house. Anytime after 6:30 is to late to have kids at a Fancy Restaurant. I don't care if you can afford the prices people are there to have a quiet evening with others. They're NOT paying those kind of prices to listen to kids crying and misbehaving. Please STAY HOME is you CAN'T CONTROL your kids!!!
There are family restaurants and there are restaurants that are not. This one clearly appears to be the latter. You expect this at a Chuck-E-Cheese...not at an expensive high end restaurant.. Their parents shouldn't have acted like privileged entitled types who give a lot of parents bad names.
I can understand if it was one you had make reservations, or it was a baby crying but I hate how people always say your love life is over when you have kids but complain about children in all public places. What if I got job promotion is my husband going to take me my 4yr old to chuckee cheese? No I'll go to Applebee's for a early dinner. If my kids misbehaving I'll leave, but I'm not going to stop going on dates with my husband because bringing my kid is inconvenience to others.I wish I grew up in a time where it was easy & reasonable getting a babysitter. I used be a stay mom and never left the house except for groceries attended. I went through postpartum alone& was underweight. My bff took me to red lobster for my birthday. My ex had a meltdown screaming at me there. I wasn't embarrassed at my toddler babbling. I realized he was embarrassed of us and left. My husband gave me hot pizza & let me eat it, I cried , that was the first time i finished a meal in 3yrs. Never again.
Don't know what this had to do with the post, but very sorry for you.
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"some places are not places for kids" yes and if that restaurant wasn't family friendly, they would turn said family away at the door. it couldn't have been that f*****g fancy if they're seating a family of 5 at 7:30.
How hard is it to ask if the restaurant allows kids/families in the place?
Those kids obviously shouldn't have been out that late!
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If I acted like that as a kid we would have left the restaurant and corporal punishment would administer promptly entering the vehicle and likely to occur again when home. I however knew the drill act up get the belt. Kids today get a gold star for doing nothing!
Same for me. My Dad would not have put up with it. One warning, then home and spanking. I was taught to respect others, and behave like a human.
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A toddler and an infant are prone to disruptive behavior. They are very little and cannot be controlled by even the strictest parents, Eric G. At that hour, the children were likely exhausted and bored. As far as the complaining woman is concerned, bad luck. The other family should not suffer discrimination to cater to your whims for the evening. You could have simply taken your time and waited until they left to resume your fancy dinner. Your idea of expensive and their idea of expensive might be totally different. To them, that restaurant might have been the equivalent of a "training" restaurant, as some people have so callously phrased it. My opinion is mind your own business and I hope you get to walk a mile in their shoes.
Then they shouldn't have been in the restaurant. Its not discrimination kicking them out would have not been allowing their rude entitled selves to ruin everyone's dinner.
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Although I am sorry your expensive dinner was ruined, I do believe you are being a bit un reasonable. Life happens. No child has a warning sign. I have kids (all grown now) but they could and would be fine one moment and complete melt down the next. It happens. Now I WILL say that if the kids were acting up and being cranky prior to dinner than they shouldn't have brought them. I never took my small kids to upscale places just in case. But at the end of the day parents with children have the exact same right as you to enjoy a meal that they are splurging on as well. I will say they probably should've packed it up and left after the first attempt at getting it under control didn't work. But if you rather dine somewhere with no children, find a place that doesn't allow children.
No one said they didn't have the right to eat out, but these parents didn't even try to control their children, or at least apologize.
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I'm gonna go ahead and say ESH. The parents should have been keeping their older kids in line better (I'm on gonna say anything on the baby because babies cry and laugh and it's just something you can't really control) while at a fancy restaurant. kids won't learn if you don't set rules for how to behave. But OP is being unreasonable Imo. You went to a public restaurant, you should know the risks. Parents payed just as much as you OP did (probably more with the extra people) and have just as much right to be there. OP chose to leave early because the kids were (what sounds to me) a little active. Banging silverware and being behind your head? So not throwing things. Not actually touching you. Not stealing your things or getting all up in your business. I personally feel like that shouldn't have been enough to ruin a night out.
Children are humans, and they have just as much right to be in a public space as anybody else. They get to exist and take up space. They are not the only loud people you may encounter in society. They didn't "ruin" your meal unless they physically did something to your food. And lastly, what is wrong with politely asking the parents to help with a specific behavior? I wouldn't be thrilled with a three year old next to my head, but I would turn around and politely ask their parents to bring them down because I would like a little space. Most parents are extremely concerned about disturbing others and are grateful for polite requests, rather than complaining about them to the restaurant and the internet. Judging on the fact that the restaurant staff did not intervene, and the need of the op to complain yet again online, I'm going to guess that this family was just being a family and that OP is pearlclutching.
Obviously you didn't read the post. The kids were monsters, and the parents did nothing to stop them. They are the assholes here!
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The entitlement is real. Yes, the parents could, and should have absolutely done more to control their kids, but to expect to go out and not have to worry about another hard working family bringing their kids out to eat is crazy to me.
This is most possibly the harshest, most cold hearted, evil stepmom kind of comment section I have ever seen in my life… to the people referring to children as “crotch goblins” and “obnoxious brats” I feel as though maybe you’re forgetting that you were once children as well? You certainly weren’t pleasures to be around at that age either. If there were children allowed in the restaurant then I doubt it was a place that expensive or exclusive or even something designed for an “adult’s night out”. Every restaurant I’ve ever been to that was slightly more on the luxurious or expensive side didn’t allow children below the age of twelve and so from what I gather this restaurant just seemed like an overpriced family restaurant or bistro of some sort. Honestly there’s no reason to be so crude and assume that these children were out to get you. The person got irritated that a baby was giggling too loudly so that says something too. They were compensated so there was no reason to make an Issue
When kids act like this, they are exactly that. And yes, I was a child once, but my parents did their job and made sure I didn't act like a uncontrollable brat. The only ones speaking up probably have brats just like these.
Load More Replies... Why on earth do you think that the OP should relax and accept this experience? Why on earth do you think that ____ (any number) of good meals NOT ruined by misbehaving children should compensate for this one that was? Why on earth do you think that the OP expects all of her life experiences to be perfect? She did go into this situation with expectations, and none of them were unreasonable. There aren’t many adults who expect “perfectly ideal” from any *one* or any *thing.* No, we adjust our expectations accordingly, depending on what we are heading into. It makes perfect sense, and leads to much, much less disappointment- or, as you so eloquently put it, fewer hairs up in our butts. I have FAR different expectations- regarding food quality, noise level, dress code, price, and so much more- of a meal at McDonald’s than almost any other restaurant. Would I be upset and complaining if anything the OP described about that night had happened in a McDonald’s? Would she? Would you?
Load More Replies... The entitled ones are the selfish parents who breed and expect everyone else to put up with THEIR decision. Babies and kids dong belong in fancy restaurants. Take your kid to McDonald's not a restaurant where people are trying to enjoy a night out. And when you're on the receiving end either working in retail or as a waitress or waiter you're going to be pissed off.
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Or parents with lil kids could have just not go out at 7pm lol
Load More Replies... Yeah. The OP is the problem. Not the parents letting their kids scream and run everywhere. Where do you trolls go to get the worst takes possible? I'm curious.
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Parents are magically powerless? Wtf. You know what you do if your kids start acting up? You leave. You don't stick around and ruin everyone's dinner because you feel entitled.
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Stop excusing parents who don't even try to control their kids. The OP isn't the problem here nor is the OP the one acting entitled. Yall need to get your head screwed on straight. I'm starting to think you people all have terrible kids who you don't bother to control and that's why you are trying to make the OP the bad guy. Control your kids. Period.
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Ugh. Glad you think your children are angels and ruining the evening of everyone around you is fine as long as you get your nice dinner. But sure the OP is the entitled Karen. Get real. You are the Karen.
Load More Replies... Lmao. Even if it was expensive for OP doesn't mean OP can't enjoy her expensive meal in peace.
Load More Replies... Yeah so weird to imagine how screaming kids and kids crawling all over you might but be welcome. Just so weird right??
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You need to calm down. If I'm paying $50 a plate a expect a no kids policy ESPECIALLY at 7:30 at night. I have my own children and I would never take them to a restaurant like this so late.
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The parents were the assholes. Obviously, they cannot control their kids. If you can't control your kids then it's your responsibility to not make them a problem for everyone else, especially at a nice place. Hire a babysitter if you must eat in the late evening or go to a kid friendly restaurant. Honestly, I'm so sick and tired of non-disciplinary and entitled parents that can't control their kids in public like the ones described here. My ex's family was like that. For rehearsal dinner we booked a nice restaurant and they were loud as hell. I was embarrassed and I apologized to every diner at the restaurant.
If my children misbehaved I asked for the food to be packed up and we would leave. Hard for many super permissive parents to realize I have zero desire to be around your children and especially not to pay hundreds of dollars to eat while someone's kids screech. Its common courtesy not rocket science.v
Load More Replies... There are plenty of moderate priced, family restaurants that you can bring your kids to to train them in polite restaurant behavior. Personally I expect to see kids at Dennys or iHop but not at an expensive restaurant unless they are as well behaved as most adults. I agree with the OP.
Absolutely agreed on the “training” part. Recently took my stepdaughter (and bf’s family) to out fine arts museum, let her bring a stuffed animal so she kept her hands to herself. It worked great! She was a little bored, but she needs to learn how to behave in adult spaces. And when we got home she spent the rest of the day coloring and making art to hang on our walls, win-win!
Load More Replies... I expect parents to make an effort to keep their kids quiet and especially that the kids don’t run around the restaurant. When my child was small, we took turns taking her outside for little breaks before she was bored.
Our kids knew that their butts were forbidden from leaving their seats. They knew if we had to have a private moment in the restroom that they wouldnt be happy and neither would I. If we needed some fresh air for a few minutes myself or my husband would take them out. We also knew that a 2 hour dinner would not work for us unless we had a sitter. You cant expect a kid to sit that long being bored.
Load More Replies... I despise parents who think that dealing with their obnoxious kids is something everyone should have to put up with. "So the parents don't deserve a night out?" If they can't control their kids, and allow them to ruin everyone else's night? No, they don't. Maybe some of the people in that restaurant were taking a night away from their own kids. Maybe some of the people there had saved up for a special night out. Just because these parents decided to raw dog a few years ago doesn't mean that everyone has to deal with the consequences.
Exactly. They don't need to eat out at the expense of others. They should keep their selfish entitled selves and annoying kids at home for dinner. The restaurant owners vare some of the responsibility for not banning them outright.
Load More Replies... If you have enough money to go to an expensive restaurant, you have enough money to hire a babysitter.
True that Matthew! Pple are cheap though... When it comes to a babysitter sometimes.
Load More Replies... Children aren't the problem here; lack of proper parenting is the problem. If you can't ensure your children will behave, you have no business ruining other people's meals. And an expensive restaurant is not the place to begin teaching children how to behave in public.
If they let the children in, it probably wasn’t that expensive of a restaurant. But the parents should make the children listen. We had 5 children in 8 years, and almost always took them out with us. They sat and were well behaved! We always receive compliments on their politeness. But they always were expected to do it at home also. Children just do what they are allowed to.
Load More Replies... Lol the only people mad about what OP said are the people who are guilty of doing this s**t too. "The kids don't deserve a good meal" ....... what fucken child gives a s**t about the quality of food? Especially at that age. Get a babysitter or YOU stay home! It's not our problem that you had children & you can't control them at a fancy restaurant at 8pm when there's generally adults looking to have an adult night. Like... you had children. I didn't. These children were being unreasonably obnoxious. Take your kids to a casual restaurant. Don't force your poorly behaved crotch goblins onto people who are paying good money for good food that they actually appreciate. Like... ugh. I'm sorry but entitled parents are the worst. Why is it that half the ppl who have kids think that they're entitled to more of the world than the rest? Or as if they're allowed to get away with s**t the rest can't? If you're an entitled parent. I don't. Like. You.
Mostly agree with you, but no.....DO NOT TAKE THEM TO ANY RESTRAUNT.....GO HOME! TRAIN YOUR KIDS AT HOME!
Load More Replies... I think certain places are not made for children. If you have young children, take them to a more family-friendly restaurant. I don't care if it's a child or a grown adult causing a commotion, they should be asked to leave. To pay a large sum of money for a nice night out and have to sit there with a screaming kid (or adult) is not acceptable. People aren't bad parents because they can't always control an unruly child and it doesn't mean the kid is bad- they're kids. But the thing that drives me more crazy is the parent not maybe taking the child outside or making some kind of effort to curb it. If I see there's *some* effort to try and stop it, I can feel bad for the parent dealing with the embarrassment and hassle of this. But half the time they just sit there and let the kid scream in a movie theater or kick seats on a plane or run around the store causing damage. Know your children and what they're temperament is and have courtesy for other people.
You just made me think it would be funny, (if a child kicked your seat on a plane and parent did zero to stop it) to slip a $20 to the person behind that parent, to trade sests with you, so you could deliver kicks to *their* seat for half the flight. I know it's not realistic, but it was just a funny thought... 😁
Load More Replies... I have kids myself and in no way would I describe myself as a strict parent. But I know the rules. What possessed these people to take a toddler and a baby to a fancy restaurant at 7:30 at night??? Also, when the kids start crying it's time to leave. Simple as that.
To those people that thought it was ok to take small kids to an expensive restaurant at 7:30, sure kids can go to restaurants and no one is saying that they have to stay hidden. Parents, however, should recognize that it's neither the time nor place for small kids. Wanna go out? There are plenty of family restaurants that cater to the noise young families make. How about showing some consideration for adults that don't want to listen to crying or boisterous kids?
Chuck e Cheese maybe....but I'm sick of brats ruining ANY of my meals! Stop taking them to restaurants....it's not healthy or cheap. Train your damned kids at home! Or get a babysitter!
Load More Replies... When I was a kid, if we didn't behave in a restaurant, my parents would pack us up and we would leave. There was home behaviour and restaurant behaviour and we quickly learned which was which.
EXACTLY! My mom would drag me out of a store, the mall, a restaurant, wherever we were if we were misbehaving. She knew that she would have to sacrifice what she wanted to do if we were being little shits.
Load More Replies... I cannot express how much I hate this comment, which sooner or later comes up in every thread about children behaving badly: "yUo wErE a CHilD OnCe ToO YoU KnoW" Yes, I was, like all of us. But my parents did not let me run amok or scream like a banshee on public places.
Leave your kids at home if they can't behave if you can't find a sitter you can go that's part of being a parent.
Precisely. Some parents are so entitled thinking it's acceptable to let their kid ruin other dining experience. Entitled parents and screeching kids is one of the downsides of working in retail (and I actually like my job).
Load More Replies... I'm so tired of entitled and inconsiderate parents. I went out the other day for dinner with my husband, the first time in about 10 months. Went on a Monday and got there at 4:15, deliberately trying to avoid a crowd. Things were nice and empty and calm. As soon as our drinks were put in front of us, that full boil kettle whistle screeching starts. Parents didn't care, didn't do anything to try to curtail it. Only other people in that section and they ruined our dinner. I would pay extra for a child-free restaurant. I shouldn't have to have my dinner ruined so you can take your kid out for a meal and not parent them. No three year old is even going to remember it anyway. Either be a parent or stay home with your screaming child.
I once gave this kid a glare down because they were up running circles around the table while their parents just sat there. I caught their eye, gave a slow shake of my head, and they immediately sat down in their seat and quieted all without their parents even noticing. Seriously, it's one thing if a kid is being loud by talking but when kids are being uncontrollable or chaotic, it's time to get the chicken nuggets to go.
I think there is a time and place for everything, even children. While I will not blame children for being children, I will blame parents for not handling situations that arise when taking them out in public properly. I don't imagine most young children would enjoy that kind of atmosphere anyway, so why even take them?
OP is reasonable. Don't take your spawn to a nice restaurant if they're gonna make everybody miserable.
If they can afford this restaurant they can afford a babysitter
There's a restaurant in a Chicago neighborhood with a sign on the door that states children of all ages have to behave and use their inside voices when they come. It drew a lot of complaints, but not as many as letters of approval.
To those who say children deserve a meal out. No they don't. Unitl they are 9 or 10 they won't appreciate it, before 5 they probably won't remember it. If the parents want a night out get a babysitter. When I was growing up we had to be at least 7 before we could go out. Our younger sister was left home until she was 7. If we acted up at all we were given three strikes. When we got home we were in trouble. One night when we acted up too much, WE LEFT THE RESTAURANT and went home. Misbehaving children are not and should no5 be anyone else's problem.
just dont take kids to fancy resturants, i mean im not a small child but still not an adult, and i wouldn't appreciate being forced to go to a fancy resturant, children dont like that kind of food any more than just a cheap fast food meal. as a plus, you bother literally every one else in the resturant
Exactly, people desiring, and paying for an expensive dinner should not have to eat at a day care
Load More Replies... No, if you can’t keep your child from climbing on windowsills and bashing cutlery on the table you have not earned a night out. I have four children, they knew by a very young age if you disturb the other patrons you were taken to the car, period end of discussion. If you were taken to the car you went home hungry. Restaurants should ask any diner no matter the age to leave if they are disruptive no matter if they’re a newborn or 90. Were I the couple I’d have eaten part of the meal as compensation for the restaurant not intervening, leaving just enough to justify refusing to pay as I was forced to abandon the meal. If enough people did that restaurants would change their policies on disruptive patrons.
My family had two parents and four children. On the rare occasion we were taken to a nice place we knew full well that misbehaving meant missing out. One parent would sit with us in the car to discuss why we were outside and how our actions affect others.
Load More Replies... I worked in nice restaurants for years and sometimes undisciplined children are a danger to themselves and others. I've seen children kick over the chair they are sitting in and hit the floor hard. They run into a server carrying hot food like melted butter for shellfish or someone carrying coffee. Somehow, this becomes the server's fault. Some children aren't ready for fine dining.
I saw one take a glass from a tray of drinks the server was balancing. The father wore the rest and began to yell at the young lady. I was quick to jump to her defense saying his “spoiled spawn” was the reason that happened and HE should apologize.
Load More Replies... It's the parents' fault that they cannot manage their children. One of your responsibilities as parents is to teach them to act appropriately in public, and if they are too young to understand, than to avoid places like restaurants until they do. My children were never permitted to act like that and I don't respect parents that think this is ok.
This. I don’t hate kids…I hate the hall of some parents that think their little angels can do no wrong or just ignore the behavior. I was a hostess for a short time at a sports bar type place. One woman would bring her little girl in all the time and the staff knew her well. So the servers would “oh she’s so cute” her but they were busy. I was up front alone and stuck with this kid who I didn’t know, constantly demanding my seating chart board, extra crayons…it was beyond annoying. I’m not getting paid squat, and I’m not getting paid to watch your brat. That and retail. In the area where I worked it was a town of entitlement: ages 0-70. But the amount of kids that would come in, run around and ruin the store…I literally started kicking them out. If they threatened to call their parents I told them to go be my guest. Grrrr!!! I feel for OP as I’ve gone out and have seen so many kids unsupervised, running around screaming, going up to strangers’ tables…and I just wanted to trip them.
I was raised in a Mediterranean country where it was absolutely normal to see young children eating out with their families at nice restaurants during dinner hours (generally between 9pm and 11:30 pm). They'd sit politely and eat regular food (rather than special kid food) with their families, and if they misbehaved, they'd get disciplined, and fast (read: a swift smack on the hand or the face). If things got out of hand, a family member would take the child outside, but that was rare. In all my time living there, I never saw a restaurant situation where kids where allowed to scream or run around without parental intervention. It's an interesting difference in parenting between the US and other countries.
The father of the children made more noise by playing peek a boo? The parents should have done something about all this noise. One of them could have taken them outside or to the car.
Parents are entitled to a meal out... BUT they should get a babysitter! FFS
Be a responsible parent and stop expecting everyone else to tolerate little Becky's "adorable" behavior. We are not required to like your child and if we're paying to be there too we also deserve a good experience sans screaming children (and as I've read elsewhere smelly diapers). People shouldn't have to "stay home" to have a nice meal without your children constantly interrupting and disturbing them. It shouldn't be up to us to raise your child or correct your lack of parenting because you don't have any respect for anyone around you but some of us will do exactly this. It doesn't feel good for anyone so please have some respect for those around you.
I don't dispute that kids are awesome as the one person said in the article. But they are also people and they need to be taught how to behave in a social setting. Be a parent, control your children, bring things if you have to to keep them entertained at the table without getting crazy. Start being considerate of others around and your children will see that and hopefully model your behavior. But so many adults these days have children but they don't know how to be a parent
NTA at all. Expecting very small children to sit thru a dinner & not make a peep is akin to baptizing a cat. Ya may as well tell the sun not to shine. I didn't/don't take m' kids or grandkids to places where others want an adult situation. There are many other venues that accommodate active children- the parents were inconsiderate...period.
Some parents cop out of their job as parents by implying that kids will be kids. If your kid is in someone else's space then you as a parent are wrong and have failed and there are no valid excuses for otherwise. I would guess that those who disagree are parents with unruly kids themselves.
The thing is, I think most parents generally agree that it's odd to take that many young children to an expensive restaurant that late in the evening. A lot of people seem to be proclaiming they would never do such a thing, or they would be more careful about it. That's not really the issue here, because it only takes one. There's always going to be someone out there who either just doesn't care how their children might be bothering other people, or it's an extenuating circumstance, like a holiday, even if it's not something they normally do all the time. Nobody is really arguing that families shouldn't be allowed a nice dinner once in a while, and there should be places that can accomodate that without upsetting everybody else. But what that means is it's really up to the restaurants to try to mitigate this, not the individuals. They either need to make it clear that certain times of day are child-free, or provide a separate area for noisy parties, not just children. I assume it must be uncomfortable for everybody when the baby starts crying in a quiet restaurant. Wouldn't even the parents rather be in an area where they don't have to feel embarrassed?
If parents aren't going to keep their kids from being loud and running around in places they aren't supposed to, I *will* laugh when their child trips or bumps into something.
I may have accidentally tripped a child running in a grocery store once. I didn’t let him hit the floor but nor did I scurry out of the way as he flew over my cane. I’ve had back surgery, I AM NOT moving for unruly children. They should be taught better.
Load More Replies... There are Restaurants in the Del Marva section of Old Town Alexandra. VA that do not allow Children to eat there so that the Patrons can enjoy an entire Meal Child Free. I am Glad that they do this so Adults can have a Nice, Child, Free Meal. I agree with this because we went through this with our Daughter's when they were growing up, and we would take them to Fast Food places when they used to have Play Area's in them. Only Chucky E. Cheese still have them. Parents with Children should wait until the Children are more Grown and Taught how to Behave when out in Public. Parents need to see what it's like when their Dinner gets interrupted by other people's Children, and then Rethink about taking their Children to an Expensive Restaurant to have a Great Dinner. Next time, Hire a Babysitter to watch your Kids so that you can have a Great Dinner yourself.
Has happened to my husband and myself, the Keg is an expensive restaurant, never spent under $200 but constantly kids running by my table, to the point my husband had to tell them they can't. The mothers were just chatting away ignoring till my husband spoke up and gave us dirty glares. Your job lady and we are trying to have a nice meal. Had happened so often we never go back any more. Found a wonderful place that is child free at dinner. Please people, take care of your kids, some of us never get much if any alone time away from our own, don't ruin it for the rest of us.
If you go to an expensive restaurant and somebody comes in with kids literally everybody in the restaurant tenses up. Parents don't realise it because they're parents but seriously, the second anybody sees kids we can't enjoy ourselves because we're waiting for them to freak out and start screaming. My opinion is if your kid starts screaming in the restaurant you have 5 minutes to shut them up or you can get the hell out and go to a Mcdonald's with the rest of the trash
No! We don't want that at McDonalds either! Go to Chuck E Cheese or stay home!
Load More Replies... That lady wasn't being unreasonable. I've asked to be reseated due to noisy children. I don't go out to eat very often, but when I do, I carefully pick a place and time that children won't be around. I don't have children, and I don't want them, even had a hysterectomy, so why should I have to babysit your child because you decided to eat out at your child's bedtime? However, it's important to note that the parents of the children are complete ignorant, indignant assholes. They are responsible for their children. I have never been mad at the kids, but I do get frustrated with parents. And, my mouth can get me in trouble, because I rarely stay quiet about these things.
I know if it had been me, I would have spoken up. Or my husband would have beat me to it. I would said something to those lazy a*s non parents to rein in their monsters!
Load More Replies... There's a difference between children needing to be put in public to learn how to deal and this. What irresponsible, lazy parents.
I feel like it's a time and place thing. If you're somewhere where people are expected to wear some sort of jacket, then yeah there shouldn't be kids there. If you're at an Applebee's then you should probably expect to hear someone's kid screaming its head off. Parents if you're not sure just ask yourself "is this the type of establishment that will provide crayons?" If the answer is no, then get a sitter.
No! Applebee's is NOT made for children! NO ONE should EXPECT to listen to I'll behaved children of assholes! You expect to hear loud kids at play grounds and Chuck E Cheese, stop effing up my meals a*****e parents!
Load More Replies... The key is to start your child young. I have 2 sons now 22 and 17. We started taking them almost everywhere (except bars of course) with us when they were babies so by the time they were 2 and 3 they knew how to act in nice restaurants. We always made sure they had had a nap, came armed with quiet activities for them to do and gave them food before we got there because usually the problems arise when the child is tired, bored or hungry. Most of the time we got comments about how well behaved they were. There were a few times they acted up and we had an escape plan so we didn't disturb other people. Just because you have kids doesnt mean its ok to disturb other people. Its people that dont dicipline their kids or they do what they call the "soft discipline"🙄 that makes bringing kids to nice restaurants worrisome. My kids knew if we had to get up and have a meeting in the restroom that they werent going to be happy. I think we only needed 1 or 2 of those private meetings.🤣
You should not take your children out to eat at a nice restaurant during prime times. I would be annoyed if I paid for an expensive meal and has disruptive children sittynear by. So many don't realize there is a time children need to be in bed and not in a restaurant or even shopping. Many times I have seen parents having children in a store at 8 or 9 pm. They are tied and need to.bw in bed. A bottle of wine doesn't comoensate for a meal being disruptrd.
Nothing bothers me more than undisciplined children in a nice quite restaurant. If you can't control your children, please don't bring them to nice restaurants, take them to Chuck E Cheese.
Don't come to Malta, kids are running around like feral cats, while parents ignore them. There should be 100% child free restaurants, bars, cafes, flights well everything should have a childfree option. Hate the little brats !!
When my kids were that young I would leave if they started acting up or crying. I have since decided that restaurants should have childfree seating. Some restaurants used to have or still have rooms for group or company meetings that should now be for families. I would have utilized them with my youngsters.
One day I watched as this little boy repeatedly asked his brother to take him to the bathroom. The large family took up two tables and essentially left the kids to take care of each other. As I sat on the patio I watched the kid looking around, I have a son, I know the look. He pulled down his pants and started peeing on the potted plants in front of me. I’m not proud but I was so stunned I said “seriously?!” The father turned and looked at me like I was TAH for calling out the boy urinating on the terrace!
That’s just gross. Good on you for bringing it to his oblivious fathers attention!
Load More Replies... Many times people with kids go out to these establishments and hire a baby sitter for the kids. Do you really think they want to go out and then be bothered by other people's out of control children.
My mom used to always hire a sitter for me when they went out to fancy places. But sometimes I went and my mom was strict about manners and behaving. Kids can and should learn young. I'm not saying people should be hearing parents berating their kids every minutes. But if expectations and simple dining etiquette were taught at home it would be a lot easier for kids to know how to behave at a restaurant. I don't care if it's a fast food dive, an Applebees, or some fancy restaurant. Other diners shouldn't have to put up with kids running around screeching, screaming (no, it's not exercising their lungs), banging utensils, smacking the table, disrupting others space. Yeah, kids are kids, but that's why they have parents. To teach them how to function in society. It can start young. But at a fancy, expensive restaurant leave the younglins at home. They're not having fun, there's nothing to colour, the lights are usually dim which is likely why they get tired in there so fast.
People choose to have children. They choose to take them to expensive restaurants rather than paying for a babysitter. They choose to take the stance that EVERYONE in the restaurant must cooperate with their experiment in teaching their infants, toddlers, and squirmy kids how to behave in an environment where adults are trying to enjoy a fine meal. Why so entitled? These are not my kids, nor are they my choice, and perhaps your "education" should include learning what the sacrifices and pitfalls are of parenthood before jumping in, assuming that The Village will ooh and aww and coo at your screaming baby while their forty buck entree is cooling on the plate. Go to a family style restaurant and make plans for childcare if you want to enjoy an adult evening out.
The people siding with the parents obviously never had a goblin screaming at the top of their lungs RIGHT IN YOUR EAR for a full hour. It's one thing if they're yours, I hear parents get dulled to the screaming, but God forbid they're NOT your kids but youre forced to sit there and listen to them anyway, unwilling, and unexpected. I'm sorry, but you're a crappy parent if you just let it go on without a thought in your entitled brain and you're a crappy person if you think this kind of thing is okay.
I met a guy who wouldn't hold his mouth and inform the parents ignoring their kids ruining everyone else's time, "I didn't go to your house, take your screaming kid(s) outside." Every parent should understand that when in public allowing screaming/crying kids is not cute, we strangers are not in their privet house should hurry their asses out the door with their brats! I love kids, but wouldn't ever sit there letting my kid scream and cry in public. It's annoying!! And parents should start understanding that. Not my fault you had kids and they're not behaving in public.
Most fine dining restaurants where I live have a policy for no children under a certain age after a certain time. They can call and ask what their policy is. However, it's up to the parents to look after and discipline their kids. I used to be a waitress and I have seen all sorts of things. Kids running around the restaurant like it's a playground and the parents just did nothing. All it takes is a kid running into a waitress with hot food to cause issues and a lawsuit.
At 6 o’clock their mummies & daddies will take them home to bed because they’re tired little teddy bears. Applies to children too. Yes parents are entitled to a meal in a restaurant, what they are not entitled to do is bring along 3 children that are going to disrupt the dining pleasure of the other patrons. Parents need to be considerate of other diners & not allow their progeny to irritate & disturb other patrons. I think all quality restaurants should have a 6:30 limit for young children to be gone. I had 4 kids & would never have allowed them to behave like that in a restaurant. If you want your kids to be able to run amok unchecked, take them to Maccas.
Siblings and I learned very early that leaving the house for any reason was contingent on knowing how to behave in public. It's not rocket science.
People should be licensed to breed. And those a*****e parents need to realize their hellspawn are not the precious gift to the rest of us they seem to think they are. Sure, they may be able to tune out their screaming, but for the rest of the patrons of that expensive restaurant, those rotten crumbsnatchers were a nightmare. I would've made them comp me the whole meal.
If an adult would fart, scream and running around, someone would be held accountable., The adult. If kids are doing it, then also someone would be held accountable, the adult. 'Training' kids for a restaurant is totally fine, but not in an upscale restaurant at 8 in the evening. You don't drop your kid for training in the sea, do you? You begin small, it's called baby steps for a reason. Otherwise the Italian approach works. Outdoor playground, go rage there.
Rule number 1. Do not take children too young to understand manners to fancy restaurants. You start out when children are small and take them to McDonald's or someplace similar. Work your way up to family diners and only when they understand how to behave do you take them to a restaurant with a wine list. I once worked at a very exclusive restaurant and some morons booked a birthday party for an eight year old there. Table of ten, two adults and eight children. There was nothing on the menu these children were interested in, the adults proceeded to guzzle wine as if it were water and everyone was angry: the other patrons, the children, the waitstaff and management. A little common sense goes a long way. Unfortunately, common sense and courtesy is disappearing, while entitlement is increasing. Fancy restaurants should just have a no child policy.
When my children were loud in restaurants, I take then outside and won't let them back in until they are quiet
No, parents are absolutely NOT entitled to a night out with noisy children, although the person who wrote that is an entitled b******e. As one person said "you were a kid once..." yeah, and my parents hired a baby sitter or asked a relative to come watch us when they went out like that. Some don't have kids by choice, others of us don't have kids because we aren't ready, either way, parents need to stop ruining things for the childless or those who kept them at home. I'm a bit of an alcoholic, assuming I couldn't control myself at a nice restaurant, is ok for my friends to bring me anyway? If it's ok for a kid to make a scene, why not me? I may be an adult, but I'm clearly a social liability! And anyone who thinks OP is a butt, and so am I, your a hypocrite. Let's make one thing clear, if you bring a child you know is prone to being loud and unable to control (which is understandable for them, they are a child) to a nice restaurant, or on public transportation when it's not necessary, you are an inconsiderate b******e.
I think the restaurant could have a policy of no children after a certain time. We've gone to dinner at 5.30pm a couple of times when oir children were younger, and now at 6pm with a 7 & 9 yr olds. A cut off of 7.30 or 8pm would give them plenty of time to eat, leaving a quiet space for adults to eat from that time
These people brought very young children to an expensive restaurant at almost 8:00 at night. That is too late to bring young kids anywhere and expect them to behave. It is well known that kids go full meltdown when they're tired. Those parents probably couldn't get a sitter but decided to go out anyway because they're just extremely selfish.
While it does seem a little bit entitled at first look for OP to be so mad,once I read the full story,I completely agree with them. Even at 16,if I act a fool even slightly, I get a warning and the next time it happens , we're gone. I don't act up anymore but it is still a rule in place for the days I think I'm grown enough to get all sassy.
I find it odd that modern parenting seems to teach that there are no manners at home. Small children find it difficult to switch gears out in public. Parents taught formal manners at home to their children in Victorian times, and they were used at home. Manners are not special occasion items . That being said fine dining and children are like oil and water. If you can afford the dinner, you can afford childcare. Yes children need to be exposed to fine dining. When they are old enough to appreciate it and old enough to behave. Practice that etiquette at home first with them, if they do well reward them with a fine dining experience.
I don't understand it either. My parents taught us to always use manners and to say please and thank you, even to family, at home, or in a relaxed setting. We were taught from a young age to never scream or yell, except if we were in danger or badly hurt. As a kid, I thought my parents were being to strict, but now I appreciate them for teaching us well. If I have kids someday I'll be raising them the same way. I couldn't handle kids constantly running around, screaming in public places, not listening, and being generally rude.
Load More Replies... If you want to "train" your kids, do so without annoying and punishing other people! The correct place to do this, for you clueless a*****e parents, is at home at your own godamned kitchen table! No, not Denny's, or any other "public" restaurant for that matter. And the management of these PRIVATELY OWNED ESTABLISHMENTS need to grow a pair and tell the parents, either get your kids under control or get the 'f out, you are bothering other people and it won't be tolerated...period!
Okay I believe parents should be allowed to go out with their kids but the other people who believed that's responses were all entitled parent responses "I'm sure you were a delight"? Um no. No child is a delight. Having a kid you are to sign up for sleep deprivation, constant wailing, feeding them every few hours even if you yourself forget to eat breakfast and dinner. Those children were excited and happy to be out hence that energy but their parents were not directive enough and should have told them to sit down or they were leaving. It was simple as that for us. My mom had a talk in the car before we went in and we were not afraid in these modern times to bring... *Babababaaa* TABLETS AND HEADPHONES FOR THE KIDS! there are so. Many. Solutions. For that behavior. And being all like "well how is my kid supposed to learn and how are they supposed to enjoy their night and how this and that because y o u r being an a*s" honey, it is YOUR JOB to teach them. NOT the general public.
Oh boy if this script was flipped and it was adults or older kids there would be next to no defenders. If OP had been acting out and not the children, they'd of been asked to leave. Going out for a date as a couple without children (even if it's without a child just for the night) shouldn't be punished. Just like going out with kids shouldn't be punished (even if it's at 7:30 pm, the universal cranky time for anyone under the age of 9)
Load More Replies... One of the commenters asked how you're suppose to teach children how to behave in public if you're not supposed to take them out. If she/he had read the whole post, the main complaint was that these parents WEREN'T teaching their offspring how to behave...not if one was crawling on the windowsill behind OP's head, one was banging the table incessantly with a spoon and one was screaming when daddy was playing a game with them. That's NOT how you train your kids to behave in public. That's stuff you do in your own home without the risk of ruining someone else's dinner. And yes...I have kids
Ugh kids are the worst. High-end restaurants, delicate exhibitions, alcoholic venues - kids don't belong. Get a sitter or stay home so the adults can enjoy what we're paying for. It's not my fault some people didn't use protection.
I understand that parents need to take their children places so they can teach them how to behave, but these parents weren't doing that. I would understand if the noise was just crying or whining, but the parents shouldn't just sit there and let it happen when the children are banging silverware and climbing all over furniture.
I mostly agree with you, except for this- kids should be taught at home FIRST, and then those lessons can be practiced out in public. Maybe have your first “practice session” at a place where you won’t cause much of a disruption if things go sideways. Fast food places, Chuck E. Cheese, and generally places where they’ll just kinda blend in with the background noise- IHOP, Denny’s, Cracker Barrel, Red Robin… there are hundreds of places that are “family-friendly.” They are so for a reason- kids DO need to know how to behave in public, and “in public” covers a lot of places and situations. It is sheer torture for very young children to have to sit quietly and patiently when they’re hungry and surrounded by the aroma of delicious food that they don’t have in front of them. Hunger and boredom are the root causes of most of the misbehaving. Giving them something to do, along with a small snack, will alleviate these problem. It’s simply a good parenting move to come prepared.
Load More Replies... I'd like to see some restaurants open up that either have a separate room for groups with children, we'll say under the age of 12, or not allow children under 12 at all. But that will never happen. The parents with the most ill behaved children think their little beasts are angels. Kids don't belong everywhere. I have 3, all adults now, we brought them to family restaurants only. We now have grandchildren, 2 of them are grown, the other 2 I wouldn't take to Chucky Cheese. The 9 year old has atrocious table manners and the 3 year old is a professional tantrum thrower.
The general rule I have: if they serve alcohol, mostly just adults, especially after 5/6.
The title had me fuming. The kids "ruined" the dinner - ruined is in quotes why? This exactly would have ruined a dinner for me. If your children act up, remove them from the establishment. It's not hard. It's parenting. *edit: just remembered! My mother did not take me out to eat UNTIL I WAS TWO and had been taught to know better. She literally didn't go out to eat. It wasn't that hard.
Sometimes adults can be really loud too. I wonder if the OP would have been as irritated when she encountered a bunch of loud executives in the restaurant instead.
Yes! Assholes are assholes, she was complaining about a*****e parents.
Load More Replies... Is it just me or is BP publishing a LOT of anti-children articles? (Please if you disagree, please comment, downvotes just get people banned.)
I'm surprised you didn't talk in this post about all the wealth and well behaved child you have 🤣
Load More Replies... Oh I am so torn on this issue. While I hate when kids run loose in restaurants and create havoc, mine also runs, albeit doesn't create havoc. I don't mind kids playing, being loud, but kids deliberately being a pain in the a** and even causing damage without so much as a glance from their parents' make me tick. I try to keep my kid in line, I know kids can be a handful but at least make the effort to keep your kid occupied
If your kid is running around in a restaurant your kid is creating havoc. Keep your spawn at the table and quiet or keep your restaurant visits to Chuck e cheese
Load More Replies... I love the kids in my life so much, but I don’t like being in situations where parents bring their kids along and ignore when the kids aren’t well behaved. There are plenty of family friendly places to go. I would love kid free hours at certain places. I didn’t have kids, they did, don’t make everyone else listen to your baby cry.
Nothing worse that having a nice meal ruined by obnoxious kids. When we go out to eat, I refuse to be seated next to anyone with small children (or a large party).
People who bring children to nice restaurants are assholes. They're children. No matter how well behaved their parents think they are, they're prone to tantrums and other gross things I'd rather not have associated with dinner time.
You can always tell the people that have rude a*s kids that they dont teach manners to because they offended. "Why dont get kids get to have a nice meal? Boo hoo" its not a nice meal if ur kid is crawling on a window seal!!! Thats when u take your child outside. Have some empathy for once and maybe ur kids will learn by your example. Maybe the woman complaining has 3 kids at home and this is first timr in months she gets to go out and get relief from the kids. They paid for a babysitter or had family take care of them. Or they just dont want to hear ur kids scream and have a peaceful stressless meal
When I was a kid my parents would bring something for me to be entertained with whenever we went out. Usually a book. One of the main rules was no leaving your chair. Never had any trouble with that at all. At child friendly restaurants we were allowed to be at the playing area as long as there was no food on the table.
If you are going to an expensive restaurant you are entitled to eat your meal in peace. Parents need to control their children. That seems to be a thing of the past. Families with very young kids need to go to family friendly restaurants where everyone expects a bit of noise. At that age certainly none of mine knew what the inside of a restaurant looked like. Even though they were well behaved, this is going back to the 70s and 80s when we were in recession.
Anytime someone is affecting others ability and right to enjoy an atmosphere that *should* be peaceful and enjoyable (that you're paying for!), it's on them. It's on the parents of the kids. They should not be there if they cannot behave. Does everyone else who doesn't have kids deserve that? No. I can't believe people argue the counterpoint. Doesn't matter if its a cheap dine in or a five star, don't disrupt other people's enjoyment of something! I have a kid, and ASD kid, and I taught him better right away-- lovingly explaining and using examples he could understand to show how certain behavior was disruptive and unfair to other people. To make him compassionate and self aware. Its not that hard. And I learned his limits, and I didn't try to push those limits where he would meltdown around others and make a scene. In the cases that he did that weren't easily avoidable, I would apologize and excuse the both of us, so it didn't *stay* a scene for others to endure.
When my kida were a baby/toddler, they were pretty well behaved. But... a tired baby/toddler will cry and get cranky. That's normal behavior for their age. Knowing this we never had dinner out later than 5:30pm and we always chose more family friendly restaurants. And even then we'd take them outside if they were having a meltdown. I'd just feel incredibly bad for ruining some one else's dinner. So I'm siding with the OP here. Yes, parents can go out for dinner... even a nice dinner. But if they can afford an expensive meal, they can afford baby sitting. They need to be less entitled and understand proper societal etiquette in such dining establishments.
The woman is totally correct. Loud kids at a nearby table does ruin the experience. Parents with small kids should be seated in a separate room or sent to McDonald's. She should have been given the meal and wine free.
We love to go out & thus, trained our kids very early to have good table manners at home & out. An occasional issue with an infant is rare but understandable. If the infant (not toddler) won't stop, then the family should get their meals to go & she should take the baby away from the dining area in the meanwhile. No unruly, loud, ill-mannerered persons should not be allowed to ruin others' time out. They obviously ruin dinner at home. Bad parenting
There's an old adage saying one person's freedom ends where another's begins. Same principle here, and I'm not just saying that because I'm childfree and never want to have them. Also yes, I was a child myself, but I was an extremely understanding and well-behaved kid thanks to my upbringing. Yes, children have inherent traits of becoming bored, curious etc, but it's all down to how you respond, as a parent, to each and every thing they do. You let them misbehave more than a couple of times, you can be sure they'll be way harder to educate out of it afterwards. People who try to argue that screaming, yelling and throwing tantrums are normal behaviour for kids know s**t about it, no offence, or simply don't wanna bother more than necessary. Evolutionary speaking look at all baby animals and see how roughly they are being disciplined by their parents if they cross the lines of accepted social behavior, like not making a fuss in order to avoid being detected, no chewing on mom etc. So parent's saying it's just kids being kids....no, it's just your kids having lousy "parents" giving them a lousy upbringing. And that's the truth, whether you admit it or not.
I am not saying that my wife and are perfect parents, but I can say we had a plan to deal with this. First don't take our young child to reasturants that are not kid friendly (at first). Next get the child ready by practicing and making sure there are clear consequences for not following rules, that you consistently apply. We started by taking our child to family type reasturants and the moment she got fussy one of us would grab her up and take her to the lobby. She would get a moment to collect herself and come back to the table. If not, out to the car we would go while the other parent got our food wrapped up. Once we went to the car, there was no coming back in (ever). Which also meant no treats. It only took a couple of times for our child to realize that this behavior would not be tolerated (at all). We had no problem taking our child wherever we wanted after she understood the rules.
Its disheartening that there are so many people ready to defend the parents that arent willing to put forth the effort to raise their kids. Thankfully ours is now getting ready to go to college but when he was a tiny handful and we wanted to go out for a nice dinner we would take him to granny and grandpas so we could get a break. Other diners deserve that same break. The way you raise kids to be considerate is to be considerate yourself. Its easy
If your children do not know how to behave in a restaurant ( you have to teach them while at home) then get a babysitter to go out.
Childless by choice here. I tell people off if their kids are being jerks. If you can't control your kids it's your fault. Get them out of the window sill or I'm yelling at them. For people with kids like this, a baby sitter is part of the cost of going out. If you can't afford it, it's not my problem. You chose to have kids.
If that had been me at that age, I would have been taken to a quiet place and told, in NO in certain terms, that this was not the place for that kind of behavior. But I was raised to be polite in public. Under 5 years old is too young for an obviously adult setting.
If you want a nice meal, leave the kids with a babysitter. You want your kids? Go to a "family" restaurant. I have very little disposable income. I would be LIVID if parents cannot control their children. I don't expect them to be dead silent, but I do expect them to eat and converse with their parents at the same volume as the rest of the dining room. Best that these restaurants have a "no child under age 10" policy. If they can't behave at that age, the manager can bounce 'em.
I think it's always a good idea to call and ask if they allow small children after a certain hour at a dinner restaurant where you want to go. Some higher-end places will not, usually under the pretext that alcohol will be served at tables or what not (but we all know the real reason) or say that they reserve an area for families with children. Those are the places you want to go if you want to wind down from a long day during dinner.
I use to take my children to restaurants when they were young and continued to do so. But I had taught my kids what goid manners and behavior they need to use when around other people - especially restaurants. I never got a complaint about my children disturbing other dinners. I did this because my children need to know how to deal with all sorts of situations as adults. After all a parents job is to teach their children how to be responsible adults
A little bit of fuss is one thing but no shouting and no climbing. This is on the parents, not the poster.
Gotta love the ones sticking up for the parents saying "Do the parents and children not deserve an expensive meal ?". The answer is "NO...THEY DON'T IF THEY'RE GOING TO BOTHER EVERYBODY ELSE AROUND THEM !!!". God, I swear some people are just so f*****g brain-dead.
Maybe restaurants need to have a separate section for parents with young children where they can play and not bother others.
We took our kids to kid friendly, but nice, restaurants where we trained them how to act in polite company. For birthdays, we took them to upscale restaurants as a treat, reminding them of how to act. We did, however, make reservations for 5:00 or 5:30 since most people who are going out for a nice night out prefer a later time. If you can’t do that, get a babysitter and have a nice dinner yourself and order them pizza!
The people arguing "don't the parents deserve a night out"? Yes. Yes they do. Right after they get a FRIGGIN babysitter!
I absolutely relate to how the women felt. We have 2 kids who are now in their 20s. From the time they were 2 weeks old we have taken them with us to restaurants. They were always kept in their seats and NEVER allowed to wander around the table let alone about the restaurant. We paid attention to them so they were quiet and on the occasion they broke bad they were immediately taken outside until they calmed down or if they didn't we left. There were a few times we didn't get through the first course. Before kids I never liked being near young children in a restaurant because invariably they were noisy and the parents never addressed the issue so as not to trouble other diners. It is definitely the fault of the parents who were clueless and inconsiderate of the people around them. They should have removed the children until they quieted down. Also, the woman should have contacted the maitre'd and had them deal with the issue as I am sure other diners we're not happy as well.
I think there should be a strict policy for kids in upscale restaurants. Getting seated no later than 5 p.m. Kids typically start getting tired & cranky by 6:30-7:00. They need to be home by then & getting ready for bed. Idc how much of a kid person you are, I KNOW, no one wants to waste their time or money, being miserable when out for a nice dinner. And sadly, there's SO many parents that are too stupid to realize that the rest of society has no desire to have your kids imposed on them. The world doesn't revolve around you just because you're too tight to hire a sitter for a couple hours. I would've left this restaurant & found another one or just went home. Parents act like the minute they sit down tht the restaurant automatically becomes their sitter & they totally block out what their kids are doing & this seriously SUCKS!! STOP IT!!
I hope these children treat these jerks in their old age as awful as they have been treated. If you want a quiet private dinner order in. There are restaurants with age restrictions. Eat there. People just want to blame someone for their own misery. Get a life and leave the children alone! If children exiting bothers you, then clearly you are a POS. Adults act like spoiled children, then they complain about actual kids (who have an excuse for not being able to control their emotions)? This species is doomed. Anyone who agrees with this person is garbage.
First what the heck are toddlers and an infant doing awake past 7:30? Let alone, out and about at a fancy restaurant? As a mother to 5, I would NEVER bring my children to a place like that at 7:30pm! Maybe McDonalds as a LAST resort, but not fine dining. Other people didnt make the choice to spawn my crotch goblins and keep them up past a reasonable time just to eat at a restaurant that probably wont serve foods my kids want to eat anyway. Ergh. This makes me so angry.
Allowing them to bang cutlery and crawl on the window sill is not new behavior, regardless of age. This is carry over behavior from home. Yes, children will be disruptive, especially when they're bored and tired but if taught certain things from home these "little sponges" will absorb what is acceptable, and not. You're not being unreasonable because this is not totally the children's fault. The parents bear quite a bit of the responsibility here.
"New parents have the right to dine put" Right. Because when I'm planning a special evening for my wife my first thought is "you know what would make the night just PERFECT? A shrieking infant in my ear for the entirety of my meal!" Sure you have the right to eat out. Just like I have the right to not have to put up with your selfish lack of parenting.
The nicest place that I take my toddler is somewhere like Olive Garden, and we leave if she is misbehaving. I do say to give parents a few minutes to calm the child down because it can take a short period of time to get them distracted if something upset them. My rule for if the restaurant is appropriate is if they have a separate kids menu, especially one with crayons; those restaurants are expecting kids and toddlers. Anything more expensive than that is a no. Unfortunately, the grandparents don't always remember that and will take us somewhere fancier than we would have been ok taking our daughter to if we had known. I also like the times I have been to restaurants, and it's quiet enough that the hostess is able to sit all the families in the same area and the people without kids in another. It's a lot less stressful and annoying for everyone.
I'm not getting all the things about kids not going to the restaurant at 7:30, though. Some people just have later schedules. My daughter's bedtime has always been 9 because that works better with our schedule. She just sleeps later than most kids her age too. So us being out to eat at 7:30 is pretty usual, and I'm seeing more younger families out that late too. Everyone's work and home schedules are different. Kids don't need to be in bed at 7 anymore.
Load More Replies... I think the problem is the parents don’t know how to discipline kids these days. No I’m not saying beat them, but I’ve seen kids out like this and you just always wonder how they act at home. There’s a reason for the cliché curtain climbers. Kids only do what they are taught and mimic what they see and hear. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t like snot gobblers. I don’t however mind we’ll behaved kids. Training begins at home. So no not bu
Alot of people love nothing more than to complain about others children, so I thought I'd share some food for thought. A restaurants main buisness is to make money by preparing and selling food. A simple couple would pay for two meals, maybe a glass of wine each, and maybe a dessert each. A family with three kids is paying for 5 meals 5 drinks and possibly 5 desserts. Which means they are actually paying far more than the complainers. A restaurants main income comes from families. Without families coming in they could not stay afloat. The money coming in from the occasional couples would simply not be enough to keep it going. The OP sounds like someone who expects the world to revolve around them. The restaurant had lots of other paying guests to take care of, not just her.
Kids have as much right as anyone and are the future regular customers. Kids have a sixth sense about strangers not liking them and will respond accordingly. So if you want nice, calm, behaved kids at the table next to you, be nice to them, theyll be nice and respectful back. And vice-versa! Also, parents are also allowed a little slack, they are paying handsomely for it, they chose not to go to MaccyD's! Having said that, in my experience, if this was a truly upmarket establishment the whole thing would have been taken care of very efficiently and effortlessly by the staff who would have anticipated any issue. But banning children is commercial suicide in Europe, and probably illegal?
Ok, so I probably will get down voted but consider 3/4 hypotesis with me: 1. The family had to save money to go to the restaurant and could not afford a babysitter. My parents worked hard but we rarely had money to eat out, let alone on fancy placeals and wherever they did get enough money, they took me and my sibs, even when we where young 2. They DID hire a babysitter, who had to cancel for some reason and they didn't find another. "Then just don't go!". At least in my country, a lot of places have non-refund If is a reservation, so they might have decided to take the kids and use the Babysitter money to pay the children meal... OR 3. OP did not say if someone Else was on the table. It might have been a birthday or something, or someone might have got there after OP left. Once my dad's cousin came to visit and invited us to a fancy place when I was like 5, and my parents did not feel like refusing free food and seeing a stranded family member bc some people might be bothered by us...
I am a Grandmother that adores her 2 grandchildren. The six of us, (daughter, Saint-son-in-law, husband, and 2 Grandchildren, (3 and 6) went out to dinner at a very nice family owned restaurant in Atlanta. My Grandchildren were wild. Nothing, not threats or treats could convince them to behave. We ordered a large order of their famous Greek food. Children camped out under table. I excused myself and found the matriarch that rules the dining room. I explained my problem and paid our bill with a healthy tip. The lovely woman did exactly what I asked. She walked over to our table and said she was sorry but we had to leave. The adults loved it. We acted so embarrassed and apologetic. The restaurant is famous for their fabulous cases of desserts as you walk in. The children, still in shock, asked if they couldn’t have a dessert to go. We said ,”no they won’t let us take them home”. You could see the little gears in their brains working. That was years ago. We never had another problem! 😂
I lived this with my youngest daughter. We would go to a nice restaurant and she would immediately clear the table of all silver and salt and pepper, anything she could get her hands on and then scream so loud if you tried to take them away, you and everyone else could hardly think. The difference between these scenarios was I would immediately remove myself and my daughter from the restaurant so everyone in our party and the restaurant could enjoy their dinner. After two of these experiences, where I walked the sidewalk while everyone enjoyed their dinner, I decided this was why kid restaurants weigh play areas were the restaurants appropriate to teach children "put to dinner manners" not fine dinning restaurants. My desire to enjoy a nice restaurant with a toddler does not outway others in their desire to enjoy a fine dinning experience without chaos at the next table. Let's be honest who really enjoys that. This is a perfect example of people not being responsible or socially.
So my issue with this is that you are expecting the place to not have parents and kids as if you and your needs are singlehandedly more important. Kids exist. You are the master of your own feelings. You cannot control what other people will do. You allowed the presence of children to ruin your evening. For example, will we ban people that are just too noisy because they're having a good time? Adults can be pretty loud and I really don't care to hear your conversations either. But you have a choice to either let it get to you or to just go on with your meal and accept you don't control other people.
And before you ask, no I don't take kids to fancy places, but I'm not going to restrict other people from taking their kids to go have a nice meal.
Load More Replies... At the end of the day.... if you are bothered by noisy children in an expensive place or any place it would be best to book a table at a place that does not allow children. Because you have control over that. You can't control other people and their choices in places to eat, whether they bring their kids, how those kids behave and what the parents or the restaurant does about it. You can call the kids, their parents and the restaurant assholes but that doesn't change the fact that your evening out was ruined. The price point of said restaurant in the end is completely irrelevant. An assumption the price point meant no noisy kids is misguided.
Kids DO NOT belong in fancy expensive restaurants! I have 4 (now adults) and 6 grandchildren and although I and their parents wouldn't let them act up they just don't belong there. As for the crying parents that told the OP she was wrong...trust me when I tell you we all don't think your kids are precious!
Your issue should be with the children's parents, not the kids. Thet failed to keep their children under control or quietly entertained. Since you couldnt move your table, you should have spoken diplomatically to the parents. Then, some times there just isnt a fix for other peoples behaviour. You got a free bottle of wine. Thats life.
Though I'm torn on the whole kids in bed by 730 thing, I don't exactly believe that they should only be allowed to dine at fast food places. I also firmly believe in keeping your children in check and teaching them proper dining etiquette starting from toddlerhood. I also have been known to either cancel my order or get it changed to to go if my kids got to the point where they refused to behave.
If the children act this way in public and the parents Don't take care of the problem, I can only imagine what dinner time is like at their house. Anytime after 6:30 is to late to have kids at a Fancy Restaurant. I don't care if you can afford the prices people are there to have a quiet evening with others. They're NOT paying those kind of prices to listen to kids crying and misbehaving. Please STAY HOME is you CAN'T CONTROL your kids!!!
There are family restaurants and there are restaurants that are not. This one clearly appears to be the latter. You expect this at a Chuck-E-Cheese...not at an expensive high end restaurant.. Their parents shouldn't have acted like privileged entitled types who give a lot of parents bad names.
I can understand if it was one you had make reservations, or it was a baby crying but I hate how people always say your love life is over when you have kids but complain about children in all public places. What if I got job promotion is my husband going to take me my 4yr old to chuckee cheese? No I'll go to Applebee's for a early dinner. If my kids misbehaving I'll leave, but I'm not going to stop going on dates with my husband because bringing my kid is inconvenience to others.I wish I grew up in a time where it was easy & reasonable getting a babysitter. I used be a stay mom and never left the house except for groceries attended. I went through postpartum alone& was underweight. My bff took me to red lobster for my birthday. My ex had a meltdown screaming at me there. I wasn't embarrassed at my toddler babbling. I realized he was embarrassed of us and left. My husband gave me hot pizza & let me eat it, I cried , that was the first time i finished a meal in 3yrs. Never again.
Don't know what this had to do with the post, but very sorry for you.
Load More Replies... "some places are not places for kids" yes and if that restaurant wasn't family friendly, they would turn said family away at the door. it couldn't have been that f*****g fancy if they're seating a family of 5 at 7:30.
How hard is it to ask if the restaurant allows kids/families in the place?
Those kids obviously shouldn't have been out that late!
Load More Replies... If I acted like that as a kid we would have left the restaurant and corporal punishment would administer promptly entering the vehicle and likely to occur again when home. I however knew the drill act up get the belt. Kids today get a gold star for doing nothing!
Same for me. My Dad would not have put up with it. One warning, then home and spanking. I was taught to respect others, and behave like a human.
Load More Replies... A toddler and an infant are prone to disruptive behavior. They are very little and cannot be controlled by even the strictest parents, Eric G. At that hour, the children were likely exhausted and bored. As far as the complaining woman is concerned, bad luck. The other family should not suffer discrimination to cater to your whims for the evening. You could have simply taken your time and waited until they left to resume your fancy dinner. Your idea of expensive and their idea of expensive might be totally different. To them, that restaurant might have been the equivalent of a "training" restaurant, as some people have so callously phrased it. My opinion is mind your own business and I hope you get to walk a mile in their shoes.
Then they shouldn't have been in the restaurant. Its not discrimination kicking them out would have not been allowing their rude entitled selves to ruin everyone's dinner.
Load More Replies... Although I am sorry your expensive dinner was ruined, I do believe you are being a bit un reasonable. Life happens. No child has a warning sign. I have kids (all grown now) but they could and would be fine one moment and complete melt down the next. It happens. Now I WILL say that if the kids were acting up and being cranky prior to dinner than they shouldn't have brought them. I never took my small kids to upscale places just in case. But at the end of the day parents with children have the exact same right as you to enjoy a meal that they are splurging on as well. I will say they probably should've packed it up and left after the first attempt at getting it under control didn't work. But if you rather dine somewhere with no children, find a place that doesn't allow children.
No one said they didn't have the right to eat out, but these parents didn't even try to control their children, or at least apologize.
Load More Replies... I'm gonna go ahead and say ESH. The parents should have been keeping their older kids in line better (I'm on gonna say anything on the baby because babies cry and laugh and it's just something you can't really control) while at a fancy restaurant. kids won't learn if you don't set rules for how to behave. But OP is being unreasonable Imo. You went to a public restaurant, you should know the risks. Parents payed just as much as you OP did (probably more with the extra people) and have just as much right to be there. OP chose to leave early because the kids were (what sounds to me) a little active. Banging silverware and being behind your head? So not throwing things. Not actually touching you. Not stealing your things or getting all up in your business. I personally feel like that shouldn't have been enough to ruin a night out.
Children are humans, and they have just as much right to be in a public space as anybody else. They get to exist and take up space. They are not the only loud people you may encounter in society. They didn't "ruin" your meal unless they physically did something to your food. And lastly, what is wrong with politely asking the parents to help with a specific behavior? I wouldn't be thrilled with a three year old next to my head, but I would turn around and politely ask their parents to bring them down because I would like a little space. Most parents are extremely concerned about disturbing others and are grateful for polite requests, rather than complaining about them to the restaurant and the internet. Judging on the fact that the restaurant staff did not intervene, and the need of the op to complain yet again online, I'm going to guess that this family was just being a family and that OP is pearlclutching.
Obviously you didn't read the post. The kids were monsters, and the parents did nothing to stop them. They are the assholes here!
Load More Replies... The entitlement is real. Yes, the parents could, and should have absolutely done more to control their kids, but to expect to go out and not have to worry about another hard working family bringing their kids out to eat is crazy to me.
This is most possibly the harshest, most cold hearted, evil stepmom kind of comment section I have ever seen in my life… to the people referring to children as “crotch goblins” and “obnoxious brats” I feel as though maybe you’re forgetting that you were once children as well? You certainly weren’t pleasures to be around at that age either. If there were children allowed in the restaurant then I doubt it was a place that expensive or exclusive or even something designed for an “adult’s night out”. Every restaurant I’ve ever been to that was slightly more on the luxurious or expensive side didn’t allow children below the age of twelve and so from what I gather this restaurant just seemed like an overpriced family restaurant or bistro of some sort. Honestly there’s no reason to be so crude and assume that these children were out to get you. The person got irritated that a baby was giggling too loudly so that says something too. They were compensated so there was no reason to make an Issue
When kids act like this, they are exactly that. And yes, I was a child once, but my parents did their job and made sure I didn't act like a uncontrollable brat. The only ones speaking up probably have brats just like these.
Load More Replies... Why on earth do you think that the OP should relax and accept this experience? Why on earth do you think that ____ (any number) of good meals NOT ruined by misbehaving children should compensate for this one that was? Why on earth do you think that the OP expects all of her life experiences to be perfect? She did go into this situation with expectations, and none of them were unreasonable. There aren’t many adults who expect “perfectly ideal” from any *one* or any *thing.* No, we adjust our expectations accordingly, depending on what we are heading into. It makes perfect sense, and leads to much, much less disappointment- or, as you so eloquently put it, fewer hairs up in our butts. I have FAR different expectations- regarding food quality, noise level, dress code, price, and so much more- of a meal at McDonald’s than almost any other restaurant. Would I be upset and complaining if anything the OP described about that night had happened in a McDonald’s? Would she? Would you?
Load More Replies... The entitled ones are the selfish parents who breed and expect everyone else to put up with THEIR decision. Babies and kids dong belong in fancy restaurants. Take your kid to McDonald's not a restaurant where people are trying to enjoy a night out. And when you're on the receiving end either working in retail or as a waitress or waiter you're going to be pissed off.
Load More Replies... Or parents with lil kids could have just not go out at 7pm lol
Load More Replies... Yeah. The OP is the problem. Not the parents letting their kids scream and run everywhere. Where do you trolls go to get the worst takes possible? I'm curious.
Load More Replies... Parents are magically powerless? Wtf. You know what you do if your kids start acting up? You leave. You don't stick around and ruin everyone's dinner because you feel entitled.
Load More Replies... Stop excusing parents who don't even try to control their kids. The OP isn't the problem here nor is the OP the one acting entitled. Yall need to get your head screwed on straight. I'm starting to think you people all have terrible kids who you don't bother to control and that's why you are trying to make the OP the bad guy. Control your kids. Period.
Load More Replies... Ugh. Glad you think your children are angels and ruining the evening of everyone around you is fine as long as you get your nice dinner. But sure the OP is the entitled Karen. Get real. You are the Karen.
Load More Replies... Lmao. Even if it was expensive for OP doesn't mean OP can't enjoy her expensive meal in peace.
Load More Replies... Yeah so weird to imagine how screaming kids and kids crawling all over you might but be welcome. Just so weird right??
Load More Replies... You need to calm down. If I'm paying $50 a plate a expect a no kids policy ESPECIALLY at 7:30 at night. I have my own children and I would never take them to a restaurant like this so late.
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